#(i've decided that one of her traits in the AU is being very annoying about 'tonnage'.)
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doolallymagpie · 1 year ago
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wait if i do BTAU Cibola Burn for NaNo that means i get to write the exact moment Murtry realizes he fucked up (which is Bobbie giving his entire scouting lance the ol' Highland Burial)
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dazzlingjaeyun · 1 month ago
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𝐫𝐮𝐢𝐧 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 – 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐣𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐠
bestfriend!jay x fem!reader
genre: friends to lovers, fake dating, fluff & a tiny bit of angst <3
warnings: mentions of food, skinship, curse words, a tiny bit suggestive at some points
word count: 5.7k
a/n: short mention of &team's nicholas for the sake of the plot; he can literally be read as any other guy, i just needed another name lol
a/n²: i know this is the second f2l au i've written about jay but i just can't help it (we all need best friend jay in our lives) (╥﹏╥)
↝ dazzlingjaeyun's bookshelf
‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊ ♡ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙·̩̩̥͙*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ♡ ‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊
you were just about to settle down on the sofa next to jay for your usual friday night movie marathon when you heard a low groan escape his lips. his hand was tangled in his hair, frustration evident on his furrowed brows as he stared intently at his phone screen.
“someone’s not excited about movie night?” you teased. “i promise, i’m not making you rewatch finding nemo for the tenth time!”
your best friend shot you a glare, clearly not in the mood for your humor. “it’s not the movie night, idiot,” he said with a low voice. “i have to go back home for family dinner tomorrow…” he explained.
your amused expression shifted to one of confusion. “what’s so bad about that?” you asked.
after all, his family was insanely sweet, and the food was immaculate. you knew that from years of friendship. ever since the two of you had become friends some time in high school, you’d always looked forward to being at his place – specifically when you knew there would be food. and there’d always be food, both of his parents being not only skilled cooks but also very passionate about it. luckily, these traits rubbed off on jay, so now, after you both had left your hometown for college and decided to move in together for the sake of sharing rent, you had your own personal chef.
“nothing usually… but they haven’t stopped asking about my love life ever since we moved here, and it’s so annoying,” he whined, throwing his head back into the cushions of the sofa in frustration. “my mom keeps on asking; i swear she’ll set me up with a random girl if i don’t show up with a girlfriend in the next two months.”
you put your lips together tightly, trying not to laugh at his words. he noticed despite your effort to hide it and took the nearest pillow to throw it at you. “it’s not funny! they just don’t stop.” the tone of his voice grew more desperate.
you successfully dodged the pillow, letting out a small chuckle. “well, why don’t you just tell them that you’re not into girls?” you asked, breaking out in laughter as you saw the bewildered expression on his face. “you’re a terrible friend; you’re no help at all!” he complained, crossing his arms in front of his chest.
your laughter died down soon after, and you looked at him with a more sincere expression. “no, but i’m serious, jay. just tell them that you’re not looking for anything right now. you’re focusing on college, and you’re doing well… and that’s what they’d want for you, after all.”
he sighed. “yeah, no. i tried, but they just don’t stop asking.”
you hummed, thinking about how to help him out of the constant questions. “i mean… it’s not like you haven’t gotten to know any girls,” you started, remembering some nights that he’d asked you to stay over at a friend’s house, or you cursing him for waking you up in the middle of the night when he was busy with a girl next door to your room. “you can tell them you just haven’t found the right one yet. you wouldn’t even lie.”
before he could reply, you blurted out the next idea that came to your mind. “or just ask one of them to join you?”
he shook his head without hesitation. “no way in hell, that would be so awkward. i cannot appear with a girl who i know nothing of and pretend to be her boyfriend? they’ll catch on immediately,” he protested. “besides, i don’t even have the numbers for half of them.”
you raised an eyebrow, looking at him in surprise. he wasn’t the type to fool around, and you knew he hadn’t been with too many girls, but it still surprised you – you wouldn’t have thought your best friend since high school turned out to be this type of person after all.
"you’re terrible, jay,” you laughed.
silence stretched between you for a while. jay’s forehead wrinkled, showing he was deep in thought, before he suddenly looked at you with an expression you didn’t quite understand.
“stop looking at me like that; you’re scaring me,” you said, half joking, half serious.
“you could help me,” he blurted out, before even processing his own thought.
“i already gave you all my ideas,” you replied.
“no, i mean…” he paused as if searching for the right words, “you can pretend to be my girlfriend.”
your eyes widened at his suggestion, the air getting stuck in your throat, forcing you to choke out a cough. “what the fuck?”
“doesn’t it make sense? i mean… i know you, so it won’t be hard to answer any questions. they won’t even ask many. we’re not awkward around each other, and you also know my family, so it won’t be weird either,” he explained, but you shook your head.
“they know me as your friend, jay. and besides that, how the hell do you want to explain it to them once you found a real girlfriend? you’ll just tell them we went back to being friends? or you’ll lie to them and say we ended the friendship too? for the rest of your life? it’s just complicating things much more,” you protested.
another sigh came from his lips. “i don’t know either, but can’t we figure that out later?” he looked at you with a pleading look – one you usually couldn’t resist.
“no,” you crossed your arms, “as your best friend, i have to stop you from making dumb decisions… and there’s nothing in it for me either way so–”
“a month of free coffee,” jay interrupted you quickly, and as you raised an eyebrow, he corrected himself, “two. two months.”
you squinted your eyes as if thinking about his offer.
“and i’ll cook and do the dishes for the next two weeks. please, y/n,” he pouted, which drew a sigh from you.
“fine,” you agreed after some time, “but don’t make it weird. only in front of your family. and don’t you dare kiss me!” you said, a playful disgust in your voice.
.。*゚+.*.。
as it was time to get ready for the family dinner, you rummaged through your closet, feeling a wave of panic wash over you. “what am i going to wear?” you muttered, tossing clothes aside like they were useless scraps. you felt the pressure of the evening ahead, the weight of pretending to be jay’s girlfriend pressing down on you.
“relax, y/n. it’s not a big deal,” jay said, leaning against your doorframe, arms crossed, a small smile on his face. “you’ve been to my house a million times.”
“yeah, but this time it’s different. it’s not just a casual hangout. they’re gonna think we’re dating,” you replied, running a hand through your hair, which had suddenly become a tangled mess from all your fidgeting.
“so what? just wear something you’re comfortable in. trust me, my mom just wants to see you,” he reassured you, stepping into your room to help. “how about that blue dress? it always looks great on you.”
you paused, glancing at the dress hanging in your closet. “i don’t know… it might be too much.”
“it’s perfect,” he insisted, plucking it off the hanger and holding it up to you. “just put it on. and besides, you want to impress my mom, right?”
you rolled your eyes but couldn’t suppress a smile at his playful tone. “fine, but if i look ridiculous, you’re the one who picked it out.”
after a few moments of back-and-forth, you finally slipped into the dress while jay waited outside your door. when you stepped out, you saw his eyes widen slightly. “wow, you look amazing,” he said genuinely, and you felt a warmth spread through your chest. “like, really amazing.”
“thanks,” you replied shyly, feeling butterflies start to swirl in your stomach, before you forced them to die down. “but now i need to do something with my hair.”
“don’t stress about it. you can just leave it down. it looks great that way,” he said with a casual wave of his hand, but you could tell he meant it, so you left your hair and instead busied yourself with a quick makeup touch-up, trying to ignore the fluttering nerves that came with his soft remarks.
when jay was driving to your hometown, the familiar sights began to flash by the window, memories flooding your mind. the drive was a bit long, but it was filled with easy conversation and laughter, although tension simmered just beneath the surface.
“you sure you’re okay?” jay asked as he glanced at you.
“yeah, just… nervous,” you admitted, biting your lip.
“you’ll be fine. you know my family loves you. just act like you always do. they won’t suspect a thing.”
as he pulled into the driveway, you could see the warm glow of the porch lights illuminating his family’s home. jay parked the car, and you took a deep breath, preparing yourself for what was to come.
when you stepped inside, jay’s mom was already in the hallway, a huge smile spreading across her face. “y/n! it’s so good to see you! it’s been a while, come here!” she exclaimed, pulling you into a tight hug. you felt the warmth of her embrace wash away some of your nerves.
“hi, mrs. park,” you replied, grinning as she stepped back, looking you up and down.
“but why did jay bring you? is everything okay?” she asked, a hint of concern lacing her words.
you shot him a nervous glance. “did you not inform her beforehand?” you whispered.
“uh, well…” jay interjected, a hint of mischief dancing in his eyes. “actually, mom, i brought her as a surprise. we’re dating now.” he took your hand in his and intertwined your fingers, a confident smile on his face as he glanced between you and his mother.
you felt your heart race, the sudden admission leaving you momentarily speechless. you shot him a look of uncertainty, but he just shrugged, a smirk tugging at his lips.
“oh, that’s wonderful!” she said, her expression brightening. “i’m so happy for you two!” she clapped her hands together excitedly, and you could see the genuine joy in her eyes. “you know, i always thought you might end up together… ah, you two make such a cute match!” she brought her hand up to softly squeeze jay’s cheek between her thumb and index finger. your heart dropped just slightly at her happy demeanor; guilt creeping up on you for lying to her.
after you went inside and greeted jay’s dad, you helped his mom to set the table, feeling more at ease with each passing moment. you chatted with her about various things – college, work, the food she was preparing – anything to keep the atmosphere light.
jay hovered close, keeping his hand on your waist as you moved around, grounding you as you tried to navigate the situation. every touch sent a rush of goosebumps down your skin, but you quickly brushed it off. it felt strangely natural, though, and you could see how easily he seemed to slip into this role.
“you’re really great with my parents,” he whispered as you stood by the kitchen island, layering plates with napkins. you glanced up, meeting his gaze and feeling the warmth radiate from him.
“thanks, jay. you know i love your family,” you replied, trying to sound casual, but for a strange reason, your heart was racing.
a few minutes later, as you helped jay’s mother to bring the dishes to the table, you overheard jay talking to his dad. “she’s just incredible, dad,” he said, and you couldn’t help but catch the hint of pride in his voice. “she’s smart, funny, and just gets me.”
you felt your cheeks heat up, your heart fluttering at his words – especially because he had said them when you weren’t even in the room. it was a little embarrassing, but in a good way. yet, you tried to shove the feeling aside, sitting down to start eating.
“so, how long have you two been dating?” his dad asked, looking between you and jay, a curious glint in his eyes.
“about two months,” jay replied casually, but you could see the slight tension in his shoulders.
“why didn’t you tell us sooner?” his dad pressed, an amused smile playing on his lips.
jay shrugged, a sheepish grin spreading across his face. “i just wanted to make sure everything worked out before telling you. didn’t want to jump the gun.”
you glanced at him, appreciating how easily the lies slipped over his lips, until a pang of guilt hit you again. it felt wrong to be lying to his parents, who seemed so genuinely happy for the both of you.
throughout and even after dinner, as the conversation still flowed, jay’s hand remained on your thigh, and you felt the tension in your body slowly dissipate. jay felt good to have you close to him, the touches coming naturally, without him having to think about it. he loved how you felt against him – the way your body fit perfectly by his side.
you caught him glancing at you with a soft expression, and for a brief moment, it felt like you shared a silent understanding. it didn’t feel as weird as you thought it would; instead, it felt oddly comfortable, just a little more domestic than usual. maybe this wasn’t going to be so bad after all.
.。*゚+.*.。
a few days after dinner – things had returned to normal between you two – you found yourself sitting in the small kitchen of your shared apartment. you sat across from each other, quietly sipping the coffee jay had bought, as he promised, both of you occupied with your phones rather than talking.
suddenly, a loud ringtone broke the silence, startling you. you glanced at jay, who briefly met your gaze before answering his phone.
"what's up, ki?" he asked.
"is y/n with you?" you could make out riki’s voice on the other end. jay raised an eyebrow in confusion.
"yeah, why? let me know if i need to step out, in case you're gonna say something gross," he teased.
"no, actually put me on speaker," riki instructed. after jay signaled he had done so, riki continued, "you two are so fake. first, you come back home for a day without saying a single word about it, and now you're dating?"
your eyes widened in shock, turning to jay with a hundred of questions written over your face.
"what do you mea–" jay began, but riki cut him off.
"bro, your mom asked me how long we’ve known you’re together."
it suddenly clicked. riki had grown close to jay’s parents too. after leaving his home country without his parents, and befriending jay at school, they had taken him under their wing, ensuring he was looked after, fed, and had a place to spend the holidays when he couldn’t return to japan.
"you two better get your asses here next weekend and explain. the others already know," riki said, hanging up before either of you could respond.
there was a silence between the both of you, yet it was so heavy with unspoken words, both of you knowing exactly what the other was thinking.
“we’re fucked,” you broke the silence, eyes still fixated on the phone in the middle of the table.
jay let out a frustrated sigh, leaning back in his chair. “my mom being nosy as always and riki’s big mouth didn’t help either.”
“should we tell them that we faked it to get your parents off your back? they’ll never leave us alone. plus, riki can't lie to your parents if his life depended on it. they'll catch on immediately,” you said, your frustration evident as you brought your fingers up to massage your temples.
“exactly,” jay muttered, staring at the floor.
you rubbed your temples harder, feeling a headache coming on. “so, now what? we’re screwed either way.”
jay hesitated, his eyes narrowing in thought. “what if… we just go along with it for now? let them think we’re dating.”
you blinked, caught off guard. “you’re kidding, right? we can’t keep up this act with our friends.”
“no, hear me out,” jay said quickly, leaning forward. “if we pretend for a while, they’ll lose interest eventually. it’ll be easier to ‘break up’ later when it’s not fresh gossip. less drama that way, no?”
“fake dating in front of our friends?” you scoffed, shaking your head. “jay, this is a terrible idea.”
“yeah, but what’s our other option? tell them the truth and get mocked for the next five years? and having to explain the lie to my parents?” he asked, meeting your gaze with a raised eyebrow. “at least this way, we have control over the story.”
you bit your lip, considering his words. “and then we just… ‘break up’ when it feels right?”
jay nodded. “yeah. we’ll keep it simple, no big gestures or anything. and whenever the time comes, we ‘end it’.”
“and go back to casually hanging out with them how?” you questioned.
jay stayed silent for a while, but only shrugged when he couldn’t find an answer. “i don’t know, we’ll figure that out when it’s time.”
you exhaled slowly, feeling the weight of the situation pressing down on you. “fine,” you said reluctantly. “but this better not get any weirder than it already is.”
“deal,” jay said, a slight smile tugging at his lips. “we’ve got this.”
.。*゚+.*.。
the next few days after riki’s call were filled with tension. you and jay had barely discussed the fake dating plan beyond a few vague strategies, but as the weekend loomed, the reality of keeping up appearances with your friends started to weigh on both of you. that afternoon, you stood in front of your bedroom mirror, adjusting your shirt nervously while jay lingered near the door, arms crossed and expression thoughtful.
“are we really going through with this?” you asked, glancing over at him. there was a hint of hesitation in your voice, the weight of pretending gnawing at you.
jay met your gaze, his lips curving into a small, reassuring smile, though his own unease was clear. “it’ll be fine,” he said softly. “we’ll just play it cool. stick to the plan, that’s it.”
you let out a deep breath, nodding slowly. “yeah…”
he chuckled lightly, moving closer to offer a comforting squeeze to your shoulder. “we’ve got this. it’ll be over before we know it.” with one last shared look of uncertainty, you both headed out the door, ready to sell the lie.
as the sun dipped below the horizon, casting a warm glow over the familiar neighborhood, you found your friends sitting in a booth at your favorite diner. the place was bustling, the air thick with laughter and the smell of food. it felt nostalgic, like slipping on an old sweater you hadn’t worn in ages.
the six guys were already teasing each other, their easy banter filling the space as they welcomed you and jay.
“look who finally decided to grace us with their presence!” heeseung exclaimed, a playful grin stretching across his face. “and look at you two, all cozy and couple-y. what’s up with that?”
you shot a glance at jay, who merely smirked, intertwining his fingers with yours under the table.
“just trying to make it official,” he replied, the mischief in his eyes evident.
“official? since when?” sunoo chimed in, raising an eyebrow as if riki hadn’t told them the entire story already. “you guys just moved in together, and now you’re dating? what’s the story?”
“oh, come on. it’s not that complicated,” jay said, casually shrugging his shoulders. “we decided it was time to take things to the next level. right, babe?”
your heart dropped slightly at the nickname, but you decided to play it cool. you rolled your eyes, but couldn’t hide your smile as you squeezed his hand back. “sure, let’s go with that,” you replied, playing along.
“i knew it! this was all just part of the plan to share rent, wasn’t it?” sunghoon teased, leaning back in his seat with a grin. “just to save on bills?”
“classic jay,” jungwon laughed. “moving in and immediately jumping into a relationship. what a move!”
“that’s not all he jumped into,” jake quipped, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. “so you broke the promise you made to her about no funny business!”
“hey! that’s not what happened!” jay shot back, a mix of amusement and embarrassment creeping into his tone. “we just figured it made more sense to have someone to… keep me grounded, you know?”
“sure, sure. whatever helps you sleep at night,” riki teased, a playful smirk plastered on his face. “but seriously, how did this whole thing start? was it an ‘oops, i guess we’re dating now’ moment?”
you couldn’t help but laugh along with them, the easy-going atmosphere easing the tension from earlier. “more like a ‘you got caught making googly eyes at each other’ moment,” heeseung chimed in, and you felt your cheeks flush.
“okay, okay, back off! enough,” you defended playfully, and jay chuckled beside you, clearly enjoying the light-hearted teasing.
but then, as the conversation flowed, sunoo leaned forward, curiosity glinting in his eyes. “so, y/n… i thought you were seeing that other guy. you know, the one before jay? what happened with him?”
you felt a shift in the air, the teasing laughter fading slightly. you caught jay tensing beside you, his grip on your hand tightening just a bit. “oh, uh, he was… nice?” you replied, trying to keep your tone casual, but your heart raced as you sensed the subtle change in jay's mood.
“nice? that’s it? what happened?” jungwon pressed, his curiosity piqued.
“just… didn’t work out,” you said quickly, wanting to avoid any deeper conversation. he hadn’t been nice exactly. but luckily it had taken you only three dates to understand his intentions weren’t exactly good, and you could cut him off before things started to get more complicated.
“probably because she was just waiting for me to swoop in,” jay added, his voice light, but you noticed the edge to it. the banter continued, but you could feel the tension hanging in the air, especially from jay. when the dinner wrapped up, and everyone dispersed into their own conversations, you felt jay lean just a little closer to you.
once you were both in the car heading back home, the mood was quieter, more contemplative than on your way there. jay’s knuckles were white around the steering wheel, and a silence settled between you.
“what’s wrong?” you finally asked, glancing at him.
“nothing,” he replied, a bit too quickly.
you thought back to the dinner, remembering how his mood shifted when the other guy was mentioned. “jay, you were tense when they brought him up,” you pointed out gently.
he sighed, running a hand through his hair, a habit of his when he was stressed. “i just had to act jealous, that’s all,” he said, his voice lacking the usual ease.
“then why are you still tense?” you pressed, curiosity bubbling in your chest.
he glanced at you, a flicker of something passing through his eyes before he focused back on the road. “i’m still your best friend, y/n. it’s just… i don’t like that some guy didn’t treat you right,” he admitted, his tone steady but slightly strained. you had told him about it. after all, he had been the one to pick you up from the disastrous third date before things could get any worse.
the admission made your heart swell a little, but you could sense the underlying tension lingering between you. it was a mix of familiarity and something else – something unspoken that neither of you dared to explore just yet.
you both fell into silence again, but this time it felt different. you could feel the weight of his words hanging in the air, an invisible thread binding you both a little closer as you drove through the night.
.。*゚+.*.。
as the weeks went by, the lines between pretending and reality seemed to blur. each time you met jay’s parents, you found yourselves slipping effortlessly into the roles of a couple. laughter and light teasing accompanied every shared meal, and you could almost forget that this was all an act – until you caught jay’s mother gazing at you with such warmth that it made your heart ache.
it was the same when you hung out with your friends; you’d find yourself nestled against jay on the couch, feigning casual intimacy, but the warmth of his body next to yours sent butterflies racing in your stomach.
video calls with them were no different. the moments where you’d curl into him, your head resting on his shoulder while your friends joked and teased, felt increasingly real. you both pretended not to notice the way your cheeks flushed when he’d casually drape an arm around you or whisper something sweet in your ear. there were times when you’d catch his gaze lingering on you, filled with something you couldn’t quite make out, but neither of you dared to acknowledge it.
jay often replayed moments in his head – like the way you lit up when he surprised you with yet another coffee (although the two months deal had long passed) or how your laughter could fill the room and make his chest feel lighter. these were the times when it was hard for him to remember that you weren’t really together. there was an undeniable chemistry, an easy intimacy that felt so natural, yet he couldn't shake the underlying sadness that came with it. pretending to be a couple seemed to slowly but surely blur the lines of your friendship, and he found himself wrestling with the fear of losing you entirely.
at times, when you’d catch him looking at you, a shy smile would spread across your face, and for a brief moment, he would allow himself to entertain the thought that maybe this wasn’t just an act. maybe, just maybe, you felt the same warmth he did. but as quickly as that thought came, he would shake it off. after all, you were his best friend, and the last thing he wanted was to risk that by crossing a line that was better left uncrossed.
still, whenever you both met his parents, he felt an ache in his chest when he saw the way they treated you – like you were already part of the family. it was a bittersweet reminder of how perfect everything could be if you weren’t pretending. he couldn’t help but picture what it would be like if you really were together, how natural and easy it would feel to call you his girlfriend in front of his parents, to wrap his arms around you without feeling like he was crossing a boundary. the thought left him a bit melancholic, yet he pushed it aside, convincing himself that it was just a game you both were playing.
after hanging up from yet another video call with riki, a comfortable silence enveloped you both as you lay in your bed, your head resting on jay's chest. the rhythmic sound of his heartbeat was soothing, and you savored the warmth that came from being so close. the laughter from the call lingered in the air, but now it felt distant, like a dream fading into the morning light.
as you stared at the ceiling, your phone lit up beside you, a notification interrupting the moment. glancing over, you noticed a message from nicholas. he was a classmate, nothing significant. you couldn’t even really say that he was a friend – just someone to talk to when you felt the weight of everything pressing down on you. you hadn’t planned on meeting up with him; you just needed some distraction from your swirling thoughts and emotions.
“who’s nicholas?” jay asked, his voice breaking the silence. you could sense a slight tension in his tone, though he tried to keep it light.
“just a guy from college,” you replied casually, though you felt a twinge of guilt. there was something in the way he said the name that made you realize he was a bit protective. maybe even jealous?
“are you... are you guys close?” he pressed, turning slightly to glance at your phone. his stomach twisted with an unspoken insecurity, but he tried to mask it, keeping his expression neutral.
“not really. we just text sometimes,” you said, avoiding his gaze.
“just texting?” he echoed, a hint of skepticism in his voice. you could tell he wanted to know more, but you didn’t want to open that door.
“it’s just distraction, okay?” you finally admitted, the words slipping out before you could stop them.
“distraction from what?” he asked, confusion knitting his brows together. the unease in his chest only grew as he studied your face, searching for answers.
you hesitated, your heart racing at the prospect of being vulnerable. “it’s nothing,” you replied.
“c’mon, y/n. you can’t just say that,” he urged, propping himself up on one elbow to face you more directly. “what do you need distraction from?”
the question hung in the air, heavy and charged. you felt tears welling up in your eyes, and a lump formed in your throat. “i… i don’t want to talk about it,” you managed to whisper, fighting the emotion that threatened to spill over.
“y/n, please,” he said gently, concern etched across his features. “just tell me what’s going on.”
the tears finally began to fall, and you couldn’t hold back the hurt any longer. “i want distraction from you, okay?” you blurted out, your voice breaking.
his heart dropped at your admission, and for a moment, he felt as if the air had been knocked out of him. “from me? why? what did i do wrong?” the vulnerability in his voice surprised even him, and he hated how desperate he sounded.
the sight of your tears broke him a little, and he felt a mixture of anger and fear. he wanted to pull you close and wipe away your tears, but he felt paralyzed by your words. “you’re hurting, and i don’t want to be the reason for that.”
“you’re not the reason,” you said softly, but the cracks in your voice betrayed you. “it’s just… everything feels too intense. i can’t pretend anymore, jay. i want to stop this whole fake-dating thing.”
panic surged through him. stop? his mind raced, but he forced himself to remain composed. “why? what do you mean?” he asked, his voice steady, though he felt like he was on shaky ground.
“why?” you echoed, taking a deep breath, your heart pounding. “because i feel more than i should, and it’s scary. i need to get myself together.”
the reality of your words hit him like a freight train. “more than you should?” he repeated, a mix of fear and hope igniting in his chest. “y/n, are you saying you have feelings for me?”
you looked away, tears streaming down your cheeks as you nodded reluctantly. “but i’ll get myself together, i… i just need space.”
jay’s heart sank further, torn between the relief of knowing your feelings mirrored his own and the dread of losing you. he took a deep breath, willing himself to stay calm. “i don’t want to lose you, y/n. please don’t do this.”
you shook your head. “you won’t lose me. but you have to understand,” you said, your voice trembling. “if we stop now, i can get a grip on everything. i promise i’ll figure myself out. just... just give me that space.”
he felt a rush of emotions – fear, sadness, longing – but as he looked into your tear-filled eyes, he knew he had to be honest. “i… i feel it too. this isn’t just an act for me anymore.”
your eyes widened slightly, surprise mixing with your heartache. “you do?”
“yeah,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “i do. and that’s why i don’t want to stop. i’m scared of what that means for us, but i can’t just let go.”
you saw the fear in his eyes – the fear of losing you, of losing everything you had built together.
“or…what if… what if we stopped pretending, but instead made it real?”
your brow furrowed in confusion. “what do you mean?”
“let’s take things slow. we can still be together, but we don’t have to rush into anything. we can experience it step by step.”
you hesitated, the thought both exciting and terrifying. “but what about our friendship? what if it ruins everything?”
“i’m still your best friend, y/n. i'll always be,” he reassured you, his gaze steady and sincere. “if we both have feelings for each other, why should we both suffer and shut them down?”
his words settled in the air, and you felt a warmth spreading through you, despite the tears still glistening in your eyes. “you really think we can handle it?” you asked, a flicker of hope igniting within you.
“i know we can,” he replied, his voice softening.
.。*゚+.*.。
a week later, you found yourself back in the familiar booth at the diner, enveloped by its nostalgic aroma and your friends' chaotic energy. “what’s going on with you two today?” sunoo asked curiously, popping a fry into his mouth. “you both look happier than usual. any good news to share?”
“yeah, it’s almost sickening how cute you are,” riki chimed in, pretending to gag dramatically. both, you and jay couldn't help but chuckle at his antics.
“no, seriously, what’s up with you guys?” jake dug deeper, a playful smirk on his lips. you rolled your eyes before turning to jay, sharing a knowing glance.
“ guys, let them be,” jungwon defended. “why don’t we all focus a little more on our own lives, hm?” he exchanged a quick smile with you and jay, and soon everyone returned to their usual conversations.
jay leaned in a little closer, his breath brushing against your ear, before he whispered, “it’s worth ruining the friendship, don’t you think?”
‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊ ♡ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙·̩̩̥͙*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ♡ ‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊
© dazzlingjaeyun, 2024. please do not copy.
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ilys00ga · 11 months ago
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hellooo, ur blog is such a comfort for me <3 ! can i request yoongi meeting reader who’s quite literally the same person as him. he could’ve met the reader through one of the members trying to hook them up. “you two are so alike it’s scary, i think you’d be a match made in heaven”. so yoongi agrees..eventually. but when he meets the reader, it’s horrible! their similar personalities clash in the worst way possible. it’s pretty funny to everyone, because they totally thought they were in matchmaker mode?? the two constantly talk about how they couldn’t stand each other, so it surprised everyone when yoongi just admitted that he’d and the reader had been dating for a few months after their first meeting. loll
A MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN.
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pairing: yoongi x reader.
genre: fluff, i tried to make it funny loool, best friends to lovers, non idol au (?), non idol!yoongi, non idol!jimin, non idol!namjoon, jimin is the dramatic bestie and namjoon is just the very supportive friend that's happy to be there.
warnings: this is pure fiction and English is not my first language.
A/N: okay so, there was also this one ask I got from @parkjennykim that says: "Hiiii ❤️ hope this finds you well. Could you write a fluffy bsf to lovers with yoongi? Theres hardly any of those out there 😭 i need some fluff ive been too deprived and depressed".
I thought these two were similar so I decided to merge them, I hope that's ok for both of u :). thank u sm for sending these reqs, I really appreciate it and I hope u enjoy this read. do not hesitate to send more if u want to !
ᵎᵎ 𖦹彡⋆。˚・ ─ ・ ⋯ ・ ─ ⊹ ♡₊˚๑
“I'm sorry, WHAT?!” Jimin, who’d been slouched on the couch with his head leaning against its rolled arm, sat up straight and goggle-eyed as soon as he heard what Yoongi had said.
The latter only rolled his eyes, not surprised one bit at his friend’s dramatic reaction. In fact, he expected it to be so much worse, but he guessed the younger one was just too tired that day for all of that. “don’t be loud.” he hissed and crossed his arms.
“hyung, are you serious?” Namjoon asked from where he was sitting with his chopsticks hanging in the air near his mouth as he too was stunned by the eldest’s statement.
“why the hell would i lie and say that me and __ have been dating for almost two months now?” Yoongi muttered through narrowed his eyes. "TWO MONTHS- woah, this is crazy. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me.” The youngest of the three covered his face with his hands and heaved a big, disappointed sigh.
“Seriously, why is he so annoying today?”
Namjoon chuckled as the older continued side eyeing their dongsaeng, “hyung, he’s just really happy for you. I too am.”
“I’m very happy, yes, but, hyung, how could you hide such a thing from me? I literally helped you grow the balls to ask her out.” Jimin whined and slouched back down on the couch with a growing pout, “I've been waiting for you two to get together for months.”
It's true, Jimin was a man on a mission ever since he’d noticed the insanely similar character traits when you and your (now) boyfriend met for the very first time. two individual human beings but the exact same patterns and edges. on a large scale, talking to you always felt like talking to Yoongi and vice versa.
It was like a game to him. It made him buzz with excitement, reminding himself every now and then to keep a close eye and count all the similarities you two shared. not that it was hard to notice to begin with: having almso the exact same taste (especially in music), always sitting silently when being around other people and speaking little amounts of words when necessary, getting flustered and smiling shyly when being complimented, being chill and too soft to scold or yell at anyone (most of the time), having that same slow tone in your voices whenever you talk, having random bursts of energy or playful teasing despite the cold facade both of you display, getting so talkative when it comes to topics and things you’re so passionate about, being very honest but never too rude or offensive about it, being the most hardworking people jimin has probably ever met in his entire life—something that nevers fails to admire about the two of you.
You and Yoongi were so similar, even your bad habits and red flags matched. When setting your mind on finishing a task—say a project for example—you’d wear your bodies out for the sake of completing it, even if it meant you’d stay up several hours late during the night. and when mad or during intense clashes and arguments, you would put thick walls between you and the other person, ignoring and shutting them out until you're human enough to confront them. sometimes it’s too hard to even apologize, instead, you’d slowly start approaching them as if nothing had happened at all.
“No wonder you two ended up together, you’re basically a match made in heaven.” Namjoon nodded his head as he munched on his food, as if approving of his own statement.
“i know! and the way you wasted your time pinning on each other was killing me.” being the biggest shipper of your pair, Jimin huffed as he spoke with a very serious tone.
“how did you guys even make it?” namjoon asked.
“We hit it off right after the first date.” Yoongi answered with a shrug, acting as nonchalant as ever.
“you mean the date i had set for you?” it was jimin who asked this time, and when Yoongi nodded in confirmation, the younger groaned and buried his face into the couch, “hyung, you are seriously the worst.”
“hyung, you both are coffee addicts, take her to a new café this time!” Jimin suggested with a huge grin on his face. after finding out that you two secretly liked each other, he spent weeks pressuring Yoongi to confess his feelings for you. He couldn’t believe that his hyung finally obliged after many “no”s and “I don’t like __ that way.”s and “we’re just friends.”s. it was getting really annoying.
YG: “Can we hang out tomorrow? as two people wanting to know each other.”
ME: “Are you asking me on a date?”
YG: “yeah?”
ME: “okay :)”
that was the conversation you had with him the day before he took you on a cute café date. The place was impressively good, but the date was the complete opposite of that. Nothing bad happened, yet sitting down with someone you’ve known for a good period of time and have shared good amounts of vulnerability with in that intimate context was too unpleasant. Both of you struggled to find comfort and normality in the heavy awkward silence that fell on the table. and everytime he would try to play it off and throw some joke or normal piece of conversation that he found appropriate for a date, you two ended up laughing int your sweaty palms because of how ridiculous the whole situation was.
“stop laughing!” Yoongi exclaimed while his shoulders shook, giggling.
“I'm sorry, I'm trying!” you wiped at the corners of your eyes.
"Just act like this is a normal hangout.." he had said after a short moment.
"We're literally on a date." you reminded him.
“right..”
The “date” didn’t last long, and the two of you ended up at his house. eating popcorn on his couch and watching your favorite series of movies together.
Later that night, he asked, “so, what are we?”
“whatever you want us to be.” you answered with flushed cheeks.
“I like you..” he whispered, eyes never leaving the TV screen acroos the couch, "more than friends should like one another."
“Great, ‘cause I'd be sad if you didn’t like me back.” you whispered back, never daring to glance his way even for a split of a second.
“Wait, does that mean I won the bet?” Namjoon suddenly spoke, making Jimin kick him lightly on the shoulder from where he was still lying with a sour frown, and toss a few dollars he had grabbed from his wallet at the smiling man's extended palm.
“Did you two seriously make a bet on my relationship?” came a sharp question from Yoongi.
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brittlebutch · 2 years ago
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Okay, I’m branding myself the MASH!anon for a while then! (I’d come off anon, but I’ve had experiences before where people have been annoyed with me wanting to talk fandom stuff/AUs, so I’ll need to ease into this fandom for a bit.)
I’m partway through season seven, Hawkeye has had several episodes where he’s been Going Through It ™ and the people around him have either ignored it or blamed him for his own pain, and I’m just—can someone please get this man a nice chair on a beach somewhere or something? He deserves so much better, and it kills me whenever that’s not acknowledged.
(I’ve seen spoilers for the series finale, so I know it gets much, much worse—and knowing me I’ll end up watching it once and then just skipping over it/not acknowledging it on future rewatches.)
All this background is to ask—Are you open to talking Soft Dad!Hawkeye? I was also the anon who sent that Erin prompt a little while back, and fluff would be a great counterpoint as I wade through the angst.
Sounds good!! Also yeah, Hawkeye's like, Tragic Trait is that he's so good at selling himself as The Jokester that it becomes very apparent that no one around him can figure out when he needs to be taken seriously, so a lot of his hurt and angst gets written off as exaggerated histrionics until it's Too Late :(
but! yeah totally!! I've been turning that prompt over in my head as I've rewatched some episodes, trying to figure out what route i might take with it, so i'd be happy to hear some more!
[I'll admit though that pretty much all the possibilities involve Erin being Older - late teens to maybe even early twenties - lol. Kids won't usually spontaneously label an adult as 'mom' or 'dad' unless they hear it - which is why a lot of parents will talk in third person around kids and call each other mom/dad, not to mention get very excitable when baby's babbling starts to follow the 'ma' / 'da' syllables; it's all learned (I actually wrote a Bill&Ted fic about this - Bill and Ted call each other by their first names so often that Billie and Thea never wound up calling them "Dad" as kids and keep referring to them by their first names, much to their teachers' chagrin lmao).
I couldn't quite see any of the adults referring to Hawkeye as papa when Erin was little - combination of Hawkeye still being a little uncomfortable around young children And everyone being aware that they have to hide the relationship outside of the house - but I did think it would be an Extremely sweet thing for Erin to grow up and Decide to do on her own :3
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craftedsolace · 4 years ago
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CHERRY LIPS, mikasa ackerman. ( prelude & synopsis )
a mikasa ackerman x fem!oc fic, 1990/dark academia AU !
( series master list )
prelude !
Mother once told Katsumi, misery is inevitable. For which the girl had grown up to believe, but a thought had always pampered with her mind. Mother said misery is inevitable. But clearly, that doesn't mean misery should be shrouded within every fiber of her body. What's to the explanation of the agony coating her blood in distress? Why is wretchedness wrapping around her soul, controlling it to a restless demeanor?
Every single dreadful day, Katsumi felt like she was being eaten alive. Her arms, bitten with malice-coated venom, wobbling thorns for teeth. Her mind twisted with the most sinister of cruelty. The blonde truly has wept too much, all her tears, each sprung up into a creature, kindling her with its deceitful whispers. To kill her inside, once again. All of her servile and filial fears sprung to their very existence, haunting her mind day and night. Invisible claws ripped through Katsumi's chest. All this agony seemed so real, yet, so fictitious at the same time.
But her smile stretches on its own.
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synopsis !
Katsumi Ito is living in a real-life nightmare.
Maybe she'll take a step and go-ahead to call her life more than a terrifying bone-shaking nightmare for which she can't even escape it by pinching herself awake. Her mother had always told her everything happened for a reason, definitely not.
Every single day, she was living in ultimate distress as her fears were clinging on to her, for every step she took. Facing your biggest fears once can be beyond traumatizing, having the event forcefully imprinted on your mind for every single second you breathe.
It won't be an overstatement to call them her quote on quote, companions. Though, that never meant she was used to seeing her fears every time she fluttered her eyelids open. It was beyond terrifying, least to say. No, it wasn't a horrendous creature with sharp fangs and distorted figures.
In fact, the so-called creature she saw every day, was herself. Not the current Katsumi, but a Katsumi she despised. Her biggest fears unbelievably towering over her mind day and night, sending her into a panic state, her mind a whirlwind of worries.
Her second fear (yep, there's not just one), is the figure of her mother. A tall grown woman, with shiny black hair resting on the curve of her hips. Eyebrows almost too identical with Katsumi's. On her pale smooth face was not a sweet smile, warm as the rays of sunshine softly beaming, but a harsh scowl. Eyes filled with pure impotent rage; there was no trace of adoration or kindness in her expression. "You were why I couldn't die at ease. You couldn't live up to your potential. You should be embarrassed".
Her third fear was something she could never bring herself to decipher, nor could she make out what it is. It was just a looming strand of nothingness. The nothingness that brings her quite a handful of uneasy feelings churning in her stomach, or sending her frantic feelings, making her quite more even distraught.
What makes her life even ten times gradually worse, is Katsumi being able to see everyone's fears. It was more than unpleasant to see people's fears towering over them with a malicious smile, whilst they were having fun, enjoying their not so miserable life.
It was way too much for Katsumi, but she smiled nonetheless, through her rather peculiar coping mechanisms, distracting herself from getting into a frantic shape of mind. Either way, her fears find a way to provoke her mind rather too often. Least to say, her blood was filled with agony and distress.
Apparently, when she decided to have a fresh new start to her seventh on her 18th birthday by moving across the country, everything just splatters into an overwhelming disaster. Disasters just have a keen preference to follow Katsumi's trailing footsteps. Surely, there was something abnormal lurking within the hallways of Remington Academy. Not to mention a principal with horrendous side-parted hair who gives her disgusting glares on her first day.
katsumi ito
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mikasa ackerman
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author's notes !
if you want to read this on wp, it's under the same title. my wattpad username is @/craftedsolace. also, this is pretty much my first time using tumblr with an actual account???
i don't own any characters from attack on titan, however, i do own my oc's + the plot of this fic.
trigger warnings include moderate swearing, abuse, violence, usage of drugs, murder, blood, gore, underage drinking.
this is an 'x oc' fic, y'all. i've seen so many people in the anime community who reads an x oc fic like it's an x reader fic. 'oh, so we're blonde?' who's we? it's just blatantly rude and annoying. if you do that, i have some serious beef with you. i didn't just spend countless days designing my character's traits & flaws, for you to overlook it.
oml, i have so much to say. i'm aiming for dark academia kinda vibes for this fic, yk? i didn't work out well, but el oh el.
i'm not too happy about the prelude's writing & the mood boards, but eh. the prelude was kinda confusing, but dw. there'll also be a synopsis too! it's basically a story taking place in a boarding school with murder, mystery, crime & goth mikasa! ( who doesn't like goth mikasa, unless you have zero taste )
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