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Unpopular opinion: Dirty Dan shows should be banned
Okay, I felt this way for a long time but I feel like after that "Quiet on the set" documentary, we ALL know what Dirty Dan Schneider did to the children who worked on his nasty, perverted shows and movies. I'm sorry if these were your "childhood favorites" which is a bunch of bullcrap because it was part of my childhood too. My grandma and I used to think Cat was so cool on Victorious, and we liked the songs, although there were some moments that made us question why people would put such rubbish jokes in a kids show. The songs are great, but if you watch it for "nostalgia", which I can't do after knowing what Dan did, just search the songs up in the nightcore playlists on YouTube. Victorious should be BANNED along with all of Dan's sows and and movies. I think iCarly and Good Burger were the worst of all, and those of you who say otherwise, I think you don't realize how much abuse these kids went through on set and how disgusting the "humor" was in these shows. I think iCarly should get banned first, but everything that Dan Schneider worked on should be banned. and I mean EVERYTHING!
Okay, I'm 21 and hate adult humor shows... I know it's weird but I'm from the generation that had shows like Little Bear, Maggie and the Ferocious Beast, Marvin the Tap-Dancing, and ToddWorld (those last two shows you probably never heard of, look them up) and I'm not used to that Family guy/Ren & stimpy type humor. In fact, Ren & Stimpy is another show I think should be banned. John K was just like Dan Schneider in a way, he was a huge p*do too. I'm also not saying that dirty jokes in kids shows are a bad thing, subtle dirty jokes are okay, but don't take the "adult humor" too far. They take the dirty jokes way too far in those shows. I hope one day we will stop putting perverted, fetishy stuff in kids shows. Some example of subtle dirty jokes would be like the "Could you imagine teaching those kids how to ride a corndog?" thing from Marvin the tap-dancing Horse, and the "I'm trying to admire some heavenly bodies" "Wow you can see the beach through that thing? Let me look" from CatDog. Those were subtle dirty jokes for parents, but we know they were talking about something that wasn't for kids. The shows like iCarly and Ren & Stimpy just had the most perverted, fetishy crap ever that it wasn't even watchable.. especially since iCarly characters were underage. There's other Nickelodeon shows I do have problems with, but that's for a different day.
Jeanette McCurdy wasn't the only victim and just because she spoke out and wrote a book about it, doesn't mean that it only happened to her. The other girls were offered hush money. I do think Jeanette probably suffered the worst, though. I think Amanda Bynes (voice of Piper in Robots, if you don't know who she is) had it bad too. I'm sure she had fun voicing in Robots, but she obviously went through abuse on the Dirty Dan shows that she was on. Dirty Dan gave her "The Amanda show" so that she could be the star because that creepy jerk was obsessed with her. Also, Miranda Cosgrove (if you don't know who that is, she was Margot in Despicable Me and Sam in Mouse Tale) also went through abuse by Dirty Dan too. Practically everyone was abused by Dirty Dan Schnieder. He didn't just have a foot fetish either, he literally R*PED underage girls! He also held pool parties and refused to invite their parents... if that doesn't sound suspicious, I don't know what does.
I also have opinions on Disney movies I think we should cancel, however, those are old movies and I know more people have nostalgia for them, and they could be a good learning point for people to see how far we've come (like, Peter Pan and Song of the South absolutely disgust me, but they can be used as a learning thing on why we shouldn't make movies like this anymore). I'd like to see them get banned eventually though, however more people have nostalgia for those than iCarly and stuff, and I just think we need to ban iCarly (and Dan's other shows) first.
If you disagree I'd like to hear your opinion on why you disagree with me. If you agree, let me know your thoughts. I'm still mad that they removed an innocent episode of SpongeBob from Paramount plus, yet you can watch Victorious and iCarly on there. It doesn't make sense... we should start a riot or boycott for Paramount Plus or something. WE NEED TO COMPLAIN! I don't want any other kid in the world to see an episode of iCarly, Victorious, Sam & Cat, Henry Danger, All That, Kenan & Kel, Thundermans, whatever else Dan Schneider worked on! PLEASE! If you see your kids or younger sibling watching one of those shows, turn it off immediately and try to get those awful shows removed for good!
Yeah, sorry for the rant, again, if you disagree, I'd like to hear why. Try convincing me that these shows don't need to be banned.
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Critics Choice Awards 2023 winners:
Best Picture: Everything Everywhere All at Once
Best Actress: Cate Blanchett, Tár
Best Actor: Brendan Fraser, The Whale
Best Director: Daniel Kwan and Daniel Scheinert, Everything Everywhere All at Once
Best Limited Series: The Dropout
Best Drama Series: Better Call Saul
Best Actress in a Drama Series: Zendaya, Euphoria
Best Actor in a Drama Series: Bob Odenkirk, Better Call Saul
Best Comedy Series: Abbott Elementary
Best Actress in a Comedy Series: Jean Smart, Hacks
Best Actor in a Comedy Series: Jeremy Allen White, The Bear
Best Animated Feature: Guillermo del Toro’s Pinocchio
Best Actor in a Limited Series or TV Movie: Daniel Radcliffe, Weird: The Al Yankovic Story
Best Supporting Actress: Angela Bassett, Black Panther: Wakanda Forever
Best Supporting Actor: Ke Huy Quan, Everything Everywhere All at Once
Best Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series: Sheryl Lee Ralph, Abbott Elementary
Best Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series: Henry Winkler, Barry
Best Supporting Actress in a Limited Series or TV Movie: Niecy Nash-Betts, Dahmer - Monster: The Jeffrey Dahmer Story
Best Supporting Actor in a Limited Series or TV Movie: Paul Walter Hauser, Black Bird
Best Supporting Actress in a Drama Series: Jennifer Coolidge, The White Lotus
Best Supporting Actor in a Drama Series: Giancarlo Esposito, Better Call Saul
Best Foreign Language Film: RRR (India)
Best Actress in a Limited Series or TV Movie: Amanda Seyfried, The Dropout
Best Young Actor/Actress: Gabriel LaBelle, The Fabelmans
Best Comedy: Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery
Best Acting Ensemble: Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery
Best Talk Show: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver
Best Comedy Special: Norm Macdonald: Nothing Special
Best Foreign Language Series: Pachinko
Best Animated Series: Harley Quinn
Best Movie Made for Television: Weird: The Al Yankovic Story
Best Hair and Makeup: Elvis
Best Visual Effects: Avatar: The Way of Water
Best Editing: Paul Rogers, Everything Everywhere All at Once
Best Production Design: Florencia Martin, Babylon
Best Cinematography: Claudio Miranda, Top Gun: Maverick
Best Costume Design: Ruth E. Carter, Black Panther: Wakanda Forever
Best Song: “Naatu Naatu”, RRR
Best Score: Hildur Guðnadóttir, Tár
Best Adapted Screenplay: Sarah Polley, Women Talking
Best Original Screenplay: Daniel Kwan and Daniel Scheinert, Everything Everywhere All at Once
Lifetime Achievement Award: Jeff Bridges
#SeeHer Award: Janelle Monáe
#Critics Choice Awards#Critics Choice Awards 2023#Everything Everywhere All at Once#Better Call Saul#Abbott Elementary#Tar#The Whale#The Dropout#Euphoria#Hacks#The Bear#Guillermo del Toro's Pinocchio#WEIRD The Al Yankovic Story#Black Panther Wakanda Forever#Barry#Dahmer Netflix#Black Bird#The White Lotus#RRR#Glass Onion#Last Week Tonight with John Oliver#Pachinko#Harley Quinn#Elvis#Avatar The Way of Water#Babylon#Top Gun Maverick#film#television
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@superbeaucoupdevisages || 𝔚𝔥𝔞𝔱 𝔦𝔡𝔩𝔢 𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔯𝔬𝔯𝔰 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔡𝔢𝔭𝔱𝔥𝔰 𝔥𝔬𝔩𝔡
Yoav - Adore Adore
This is the song that the caged bird sings, Curled up like a cat at the corner of everything Don't feel bad even if you could, 'Cuz if you did not do it, Someone else just would It's easy Believe Me I'll show you such wonderful things I'll show you such wonderful things 'til you're just like me
#Most secret royal advisor || OOC#Dreaded rumors || Asks#superbeaucoupdevisages#(( to be fair this is more#(( amanda talking to miranda song#(( since DAS MY TAG FOR AMANDA#I'll show you such wonderful things 'til you're just like me || Amanda Vanderbilt#(( see
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Drowns the Whiskey
Dean Winchester x Reader
1000 Words
Written for: @atc74 and her Duets Challenge. I’m so sorry, I thought I had already posted this, but it was just sitting in my drafts!!!
My song: Drowns the whiskey by Jason Aldean and Miranda Lamber
Summary: Whiskey is the only thing that can help Y/N forget.
Warnings: Angst, surprise ending
The amber liquid swirled in the glass, sloshing slightly over the side. Droplets formed on your hand, and you fought against the urge to lick it up, hating the waste. Signaling the bartender, you downed the shot, welcoming the slight burn as it slid down your throat, pulling in your stomach.
It was another run-down bar, in another no-name town. It didn’t matter what the interior looked like. As long as it had some stools at the bar, and a never-ending supply of whiskey, you were content.
The whiskey had helped at first. Drowning the memories of a man who had been your everything. The strong liquid had taken the edge of the pain away. At first. And now? No matter how many sips of whiskey, those mossy green eyes still haunted you.
“Dean,” you whispered, the pain cutting through the whiskey, stinging at the corner of your eyes. Closing your eyes, your hand grasping the shot glass so tight it could have cracked, you gave in to them. Dean, sitting in the driver seat of the Impala, one hand on the steering wheel, the other resting on the rolled-down window. He smiled over at you, his eyes crinkling up. “This is nice, isn’t it?” He had asked. “You, me, and the open road.”
“Another,” You told the bartender, pushing away the empty glass. He complied, and you waved at the bottle. “Keep that here.”
He sighed, setting the bottle down in front of you. Tossing back the shot, you welcomed the numbness as it began to take a hold of you. But it faded away as the memory of Dean’s lips against your skin had your hand trembling as you poured another round. Dean, and those plump lips had driven you to distraction more times than you could count. A tear slipped down your cheek as the liquid slid down your throat.
“Damn you whiskey,” you muttered. It was why you were here. You were looking for a release, a way to forget because the memories were too much to bear.
“Excuse me?” The man sitting next to you asked. “Miss, are you alright?”
“Nope,” you answered, taking another shot of whiskey.
He backed off, leaving you to the only thing you cared about. Whiskey. But even the strong alcohol wasn’t your friend tonight. No matter how much you drank, or how much it burned, Dean was still there, at the front of your mind. Remind you of how much you missed him. How much it hurt that he was gone, leaving you alone.
You wished that fateful day could be burned from your mind. But it would take something stronger than whiskey. The day everything had been taken from you. Your love, your hope, your reason for going on. When that knife had slid into Dean’s chest, you had been helpless to stop it. You had watched him die right in front of you, and now you couldn’t sleep without seeing those mossy green eyes go glassy. Watching as he took his last painful breath.
Reaching for the whiskey bottle, you poured another shot of whiskey, trying to dull the tight ache around your heart. Wishing that it would take away the memories. The good and the bad. They both hurt right now, and you weren’t sure you could stand to hurt anymore.
Your phone buzzed in your pocket. No doubt Sam calling once again, trying to check up on you. But you couldn’t talk to him. He reminded you too much of the good life, the life that you would give everything up for just to have Dean alive once again. His call went to voicemail, your mailbox probably full.
With the shot glass resting in your hand, you thought back to your last happy memory of Dean. Before the mark had changed him. When the two of you had slipped away for a night to yourself. Parked in the back row of the drive-in, more interested in the feel of his body against yours, you had spent the evening wrapped in his arms. It had been perfect, but now even that memory had tears spilling down your cheek, and you quickly raised the shot glass to try and push the pain back.
“What’s a pretty girl like you got to cry about?” A deep voice, so familiar and haunting asked as a callused hand pushed the glass down.
Through the tears, you slowly peered up, your heart catching as a person you had never expected to see again stood beside you. “Dean?” You asked, wondering if he was a figment of your whiskey-fueled brain.
“In the flesh,” he answered proudly. “With a few upgrades.”
Your heart hammered as you looked him over. He seemed a little leaner, stronger than before. Wearing that soft maroon flannel shirt you loved so much. His hair seemed longer, wilder, but it looked good. Smiling, you let your gaze drop to his eyes, gasping when they flicked to black.
Dean/Jensen Tags: @acortez82 @acreativelydifferentlove @adoptdontshoppets @a-girl-who-loves-disney @akshi8278 @bi-danvers0 @cap-just-said-language @colette2537 @deansgirl215 @flamencodiva @hamiltrash1411 @its-not-a-tulpa @jerkbitchidjitassbutt @justanotherwinchester @just-another-winchester @karouwinchester @keikoraventeller @krys198478 @librarygeekery @magssteenkamp @misspygmypie @mlovesstories @mrsambroserollinsacklesmgk @mrspeacem1nusone @nothinbuttrouble2 @ria132love @ruprecht0420 @screechingartisancashbailiff @sortaathief @superseejay721517 @squirrelnotsam @team-free-will-you-idjiot @thing-you-do-with-that-thing @torn-and-frayed @tricksterdean @wonderfulworldofwinchester @woodworthti666
Forever Tags: @aditimukul @alexwinchester23 @algud @amanda-teaches @andreaaalove @artisticpoet @atc74 @be-amaziing @camelotandastronauts @caswinchester2000 @cpag7 @chelsea072498 @closetspngirl @deanwanddamons @docharleythegeekqueen @emoryhemsworth @ericaprice2008 @esoltis280 @foxyjwls007 @gh0stgurl @goldenolaf25 @growningupgeek @heartislubbingdubbing @heyitscam99 @hobby27 @horsegirly99 @imsuperawkward @internationalmusicteacher @iwriteaboutdean @jayankles @jensen-gal @justsomedreaming @just-another-busyfangirl @karlee-fay-my-wayward-son @linki-locks11 @littleblue5mcdork @lowlyapprentice @mersuperwholocked-lowlife @mogaruke @monkeymcpoopoo @musiclovinchic93 @nanie5 @percussiongirl2017 @plaid-lover-bay25 @roonyxx @ronja-uebrick @roxyspearing @samanddeanmyheroes @sandlee44 @shamelesslydean @simonsbluee @sillesworldofwriting @sgarrett49 @spnbaby-67 @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester @spnwoman @superbadassnatural @thatcrazybookwormgeek @thewinchesterchronicles @vvinch3st3r @whimsicalrobots @winchester-writes @zombiewerewolfqueen
#angelina's duets reboot challenge#dean winchester x reader#supernatural x reader#supernatural reader insert#supernatural angst#katy writes#spn fanfic#dean fanfic#dean x reader#supernatural fanfic
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Recent country songs that have made me literally gay gasp as a gay woman, in order of how much they make me want to write an essay on gender and queerness
HONORARY MENTION BUT JUST BECAUSE I THINK THIS IS TECHNICALLY AMERICANA NOT COUNTRY (but genre is fake) AND THIS SONG ISN’T RECENT (2014 and I’ve been listening to it faithfully since then) BUT I ONLY RECENTLY LEARNED IT’S A COVER AND THAT’S MADE ME RECONTEXTUALIZE IT: “Murder in the City” by Brandi Carlile, a cover of The Avett Brothers where she changed the words “make sure my sister knows I loved her/make sure my mother knows the same” to “make sure my wife knows that I love her/make sure my daughter knows the same” which fucking. fucking gets me. Especially since the first time that I heard this song, I assumed it was from a man’s point of view because of that line, and then I learned that Brandi Carlile is a lesbian and I was caught up in my foolish heteronormitivity, and then I learned it was a cover and thought oh okay I guess the song is originally from a man’s pov and it’s cool she covered, and then I learned she changed those lines to make a song that already feels deeply personal to her to explicitly include her love for a woman and the family they’ve made together. And that’s just. It’s all just a lot.
3) “Fooled Around and Fell in Love” by Miranda Lambert featuring Maren Morris, Elle King, Ashley McBryde, Tenille Townes and Caylee Hammack, because the first time it came up on my spotify, I saw the title and was like “hey dope I like this song” and then I heard the first line was still “I must have been through about a million girls” and I realized none of the words or pronouns were getting changed and I was getting the song I’ve always wanted and deserved: a high production value, high energy, big girl group tribute to being a lesbian fuckboy who Fooled Around And, oops can you believe it, Fell in Love.
2) “If She Ever Leaves Me” by The Highwomen, sung by Brandi Carlile who is, as mentioned, lesbian, but since I’m apparently still chugging my comp het juice, I was still trying to figure out if this song--a classic “hey buddy keep walking, she’s my girl and she’s not interested” song with an interesting element of the singer being aware the relationship might not last anyway--was gonna be explicitly queer. And then there’s the line, “That's too much cologne, she likes perfume,” and I was like OH HOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!!
This is immediately followed by the lines “I’ve loved her in secret/I’ve loved her out loud” which is also deliciously queer in this context, with this singer and that juxtaposition, but the line that really fucking got me is my favorite of the song: “If she ever leaves, it's gonna be for a woman with more time.” This is two women in a complicated relationship. This isn’t just a “keep walking, cowboy” song, it’s a song that uses that framework to suggest a whole ass “Finishing the Hat”** relationship, and that’s so interesting to me. Like a song that isn’t just explicitly about two women in love but one that conveys very quickly a rich history between the two of them. And in a genre where the line “Kiss lots of boys, kiss lots of girls if that’s something you’re into” was revolutionary representation.
(Fun fact, “Follow Your Arrow” was partially written by Brandy Clarke, another country lesbian! Another fun fact, so is basically every other good country song. Brandy Clark, please write a big lesbian country anthem, I know it will immediately kill me on impact.)
To quote one youtube comment, “”lesbians how we feeling??” and to answer by quoting some others, “As a closeted baby gay in the 90s, who was into country, this song would have changed my life”, “I just teared up. So many happy tears, as a gay woman raised on country music, this is something that's definitely been needed. Thank you Brandi. Thank you highwomen”, “This song means more than I can say in a youtube comment”, and “Lesbians needed this song :)”
It’s me. I’m lesbians.
**ANOTHER HONORARY MENTION EXCEPT IT ISN’T RECENT AND IT ISN’T COUNTRY SO I GUESS THIS IS JUST A MENTION, BUT I AM INTERESTED IN THIS SONG--“Finishing the Hat” by Kelli O’Hara. A very good Sondheim joint, that’s about making art, the costs of its obsessive and exclusive nature and the incomparable pleasure of putting something into the world that wasn’t there before. It’s such a traditionally male narrative that I’m thrilled to find a wonderful female cover of it. I’m not even fussed about her changing the gender from the lover who won’t wait for the artist (except that the shift from “woman” to “one man” sounds so clunky) because there’s value turning this song into a lament of the men who won’t love artistic women. But I do also wish she’d also recorded a version that kept the original gender so it would be gay. OKAY BROADWAY TANGENT OVER, BACK TO COUNTRY.
1) “Highwomen” by The Highwomen, ft. Yola and Sheryl Crow. I can’t even express the full body chills the first time I heard this. Like repeated, multiple chills renewed at every verse of the song. This really closely parallels my experience with “Fooled Around and Fell in Love” up there, because when I started it I was like “oh dope I know what this cover will be” and then the lyrics started and I was like “OH MY GOD I DIDN’T.” In the case of “Fooled Around” it’s because I was amazed that they kept the original words. In the case of “Highwomen” I fucking transcended because they changed them.
So I grew up on Johnny Cash, obsessed with a couple of his albums but largely with a CD I had of his greatest hits. (Ask me how many times I listened to the shoeshine boy song. Hundreds. Johnny Cash told me to get rhythm and I got it.) And my FAVORITE was “Highwayman” from the country supergroup he was in, The Highwaymen. The concept of the song is that each of the four men sing a verse about a man from the past and how he died. It’s very good. The line “They buried me in that grey tomb that knows no sound” used to scare the shit out of me. I didn’t expect to have a song that targets so specifically my fear of being buried alive in wet concrete.
(If you haven’t heard the song, by the way, listen to this version to properly appreciate it as a piece of music. If you have, watch the fucking music video holy shit this is a work of art oh my GOD.)
So I was predisposed to love this cover before I even heard it. But then I heard it. And they rewrote the song to be about historical women. And it’s like. There’s layers here okay.
Neither the Highwaymen nor the Highwomen are signing about famous people. This isn’t a Great Man tour of history, it’s about dam builders and sailors and preachers and mothers and Freedom Riders and also Johnny Cash who flies a starship across the universe, as you do.
In the 1986 version, it’s a song about the continuity of life--the repeated idea is “I am still alive, I’m still here, I come back again and again in different forms.” The highwayman is all the men in the song. He reincarnates. The song is past, present, future. The title is singular, masculine. The same soul, expressed through multiple voices, multiple lives.
In the 2019 version, the title is plural, feminine. Highwomen. This song is about women. Each verse asserts the same motif as the 1986 version--“I may not have survived but I am still alive”--but there is no implication of reincarnation. Each woman is her own woman. This version has a final verse that the previous versions lacks. The singers harmonize. It’s not a song where one voice replaces another, the story of this One Man progressing through time. It ends in a chorus of women saying “We are still alive.”
We are The Highwomen Singing stories still untold We carry the sons you can only hold We are the daughters of the silent generations You sent our hearts to die alone in foreign nations They may return to us as tiny drops of rain But we will still remain
And we'll come back again and again and again And again and again We'll come back again and again and again And again and again
Another fun fact! The first time I heard them sing “We are the daughters of the silent generations” I died! But luckily I came back again and again and again.
This is a song about the continuity of history. It asserts that women’s historical lives matter and that they continue to matter, long after they died. This is a song about legacy as well, the legacy of nameless women who worked to protect the ones they loved and make the world better. They don’t die by chance. They are all hunted down by political violence, by racism, by misogyny, for stepping outside their prescribed roles. But, as Yola (who btw fucking CRUSHES THE VOCALS ARE YOU KIDDING ME?????? HOLY SHIT MA’AM) sings as a murdered Freedom Rider, she’d take that ride again. And at the end of the song, she joins the chorus but does not disappear into it. Her voice rises up out of crowd. And the crowd calls itself “we”. These women are united but not subsumed into being One Woman. This is about Women.
And then, outside the song itself, there’s the history of this song about history. It’s originally by Jimmy Webb and was covered by Glenn Campbell. This cover inspired the name of the supergroup that covered it, the group with Willie Nelson, Kris Kristofferson, Waylon Jennings, and my man Johnny Cash. And it’s like holy shit! What an amazing group to collaborate! Hot damn!
Then, it’s 2019 and here’s The Highwomen with Brandi Carlile, Natalie Hemby, Maren Morris, and Amanda Shires. The name is obviously riffing on The Highwaymen. Shires set out to form the group in direct response to the lack of female country artists on the radio and at festivals. And they name themselves after a country supergroup, and they put out this song, a song connected to massive names in country music, and they center all of this on women and womanhood and the right of women to be counted in history and to make history and to talk about the ways we have mistreated and marginalized women, in a group that started because one woman was like hey! we’re mistreating and marginalizing women!
I just think this is neat! I think there’s a lot here we could unpack! But this post is 100 times longer than I was planning and work starts in a bit so uh I’m gonna go get dressed and listen to The Highwomen on repeat for the next hour, “Heaven is a Honky Tonk” is another fucking bop that improves on the original, it would be dope if they’d collab with Rhiannon Giddens, okay byyyyyyyye
#don't even know what to tag this bc for one there's way too many links for this to show up in any tags!!#country music#long post#surprisingly long post!#feel free always to rec female country/americana/folk/bluegrass to me esp if it's gay
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The Best Films of 2020
I can’t tell you anything novel or insightful about this year that has been stolen from our lives. I watched zero of these films in a theater, and I watched most of them half-asleep in moments that I stole from my children. Don’t worry, there are some jokes below.
GARBAGE
93. Capone (Josh Trank)- What is the point of this dinner theater trash? It takes place in the last year of Capone's life, when he was released from prison due to failing health and suffered a stroke in his Florida home. So it covers...none of the things that make Al Capone interesting? It's not historically accurate, which I have no problem with, but if you steer away from accuracy, then do something daring and exciting. Don't give me endless scenes of "Phonse"--as if the movie is running from the very person it's about--drawing bags of money that promise intrigue, then deliver nothing in return.
That being said, best "titular character shits himself" scene since The Judge.
92. Ammonite (Francis Lee)- I would say that this is the Antz to Portrait of a Lady on Fire's A Bug's Life, but it's actually more like the Cars 3 to Portrait of a Lady on Fire's Toy Story 1.
91. Ava (Tate Taylor)- Despite the mystery and inscrutability that usually surround assassins, what if we made a hitman movie but cared a lot about her personal life? Except neither the assassin stuff nor the family stuff is interesting?
90. Wonder Woman 1984 (Patty Jenkins)- What a miscalculation of what audiences loved about the first and wanted from the sequel. WW84 is silly and weightless in all of the ways that the first was elegant and confident. If the return of Pine is just a sort of phantom representation of Diana's desires, then why can he fly a real plane? If he is taking over another man's soul, then, uh, what ends up happening to that guy? For that matter, why is it not 1984 enough for Ronald Reagan to be president, but it is 1984 enough for the president to have so many Ronald Reagan signifiers that it's confusing? Why not just make a decision?
On paper, the me-first values of the '80s lend themselves to the monkey's paw wish logic of this plot. You could actually do something with the Star Wars program or the oil crisis. But not if the setting is played for only laughs and the screenplay explains only what it feels like.
89. Babyteeth (Shannon Murphy)- In this type of movie, there has to be a period of the Ben Mendelsohn character looking around befuddled about the new arrangement and going, "What's this now--he's going to be...living with us? The guy who tried to steal our medication? This is crazy!" But that's usually ten minutes, and in this movie it's an hour. I was so worn out by the end.
88. You Should Have Left (David Koepp)- David Koepp wrote Jurassic Park, so he's never going to hell, but how dare he start caring about his own mystery at the hour mark. There's a forty-five minute version of this movie that could get an extra star from me, and there's a three-hour version of Amanda Seyfried walking around in athleisure that would get four stars from me. What we actually get? No thanks.
87. Black Is King (Beyonce, et al.)- End your association with The Lion King, Bey. It has resulted in zero bops.
ADMIRABLE FAILURES
86. Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) (Cathy Yan)- There's nothing too dysfunctional in the storytelling or performances, but Birds of Prey also doesn't do a single thing well. I would prefer something alive and wild, even if it were flawed, to whatever tame belt-level formula this is.
85. The Turning (Floria Sigismondi)- This update of The Turn of the Screw pumps the age of Miles up to high school, which creates some horny creepiness that I liked. But the age of the character also prevents the ending of the novel from happening in favor of a truly terrible shrug. I began to think that all of the patience that the film showed earlier was just hesitance for its own awful ending.
I watched The Turning as a Mackenzie Davis Movie Star heat check, and while I'm not sure she has the magnetism I was looking for, she does have a great teacher voice, chastening but maternal.
84. Bloodshot (David Wilson)- A whole lot of Vin Diesel saying he's going to get revenge and kill a bunch of dudes; not a whole lot of Vin Diesel actually getting revenge and killing a bunch of dudes.
83. Downhill (Nat Faxon and Jim Rash)- I was an English major in college, which means I ended up locking myself into literary theories that, halfway through the writing of an essay, I realized were flawed. But rather than throw out the work that I had already proposed, I would just keep going and see if I could will the idea to success.
So let's say you have a theory that you can take Force Majeure by Ruben Ostlund, one of the best films of its year, and remake it so that its statement about familial anxiety could apply to Americans of the same age and class too...if it hadn't already. And maybe in the first paragraph you mess up by casting Will Ferrell and Julia Louis-Dreyfus, people we are conditioned to laugh at, when maybe this isn't that kind of comedy at all. Well, don't throw it away. You can quote more--fill up the pages that way--take an exact shot or scene from the original. Does that help? Maybe you can make the writing more vigorous and distinctive by adding a character. Is that going to make this baby stand out? Maybe you could make it more personal by adding a conclusion that is slightly more clever than the rest of the paper?
Or perhaps this is one you're just not going to get an A on.
82. Hillbilly Elegy (Ron Howard)- I watched this melodrama at my mother's encouragement, and, though I have been trying to pin down her taste for decades, I think her idea of a successful film just boils down to "a lot of stuff happens." So in that way, Ron Howard's loss is my gain, I guess.
There is no such thing as a "neutral Terminator."
81. Relic (Natalie Erika James)- The star of the film is Vanessa Cerne's set decoration, but the inert music and slow pace cancel out a house that seems neglected slowly over decades.
80. Buffaloed (Tanya Wexler)- Despite a breathless pace, Buffaloed can't quite congeal. In trying to split the difference between local color hijinks and Moneyballed treatise on debt collection, it doesn't commit enough to either one.
Especially since Zoey Deutch produced this one in addition to starring, I'm getting kind of worried about boo's taste. Lot of Two If by Seas; not enough While You Were Sleepings.
79. Like a Boss (Miguel Arteta)- I chuckled a few times at a game supporting cast that is doing heavy lifting. But Like a Boss is contrived from the premise itself--Yeah, what if people in their thirties fell out of friendship? Do y'all need a creative consultant?--to the escalation of most scenes--Why did they have to hide on the roof? Why do they have to jump into the pool?
The movie is lean, but that brevity hurts just as much as it helps. The screenplay knows which scenes are crucial to the development of the friendship, but all of those feel perfunctory, in a different gear from the setpieces.
To pile on a bit: Studio comedies are so bare bones now that they look like Lifetime movies. Arteta brought Chuck & Buck to Sundance twenty years ago, and, shot on Mini-DV for $250,000, it was seen as a DIY call-to-bootstraps. I guarantee that has more setups and locations and shooting days than this.
78. Eurovision Song Contest: The Story of Fire Saga (David Dobkin)- Add Dan Stevens to the list of supporting players who have bodied Will Ferrell in his own movie--one that he cared enough to write himself.
Like Downhill, Ferrell's other 2020 release, this isn't exactly bad. It's just workmanlike and, aside from the joke about Demi Lovato's "uninformed" ghost, frustratingly conventional.
77. The Traitor (Marco Bellochio)- Played with weary commitment by Pierfrancesco Favino, Tomasso Buscetta is "credited" as the first informant of La Cosa Nostra. And that sounds like an interesting subject for a "based on a true story" crime epic, right? Especially when you find out that Buscetta became a rat out of principle: He believed that the mafia to which he had pledged his life had lost its code to the point that it was a different organization altogether.
At no point does Buscetta waver or even seem to struggle with his decision though, so what we get is less conflicted than that description might suggest. None of these Italian mob movies glorify the lifestyle, so I wasn't expecting that. But if the crime doesn't seem enticing, and snitching on the crime seems like forlorn duty, and everything is pitched with such underhanded matter-of-factness that you can't even be sure when Buscetta has flipped, then what are we left with? It was interesting seeing how Italian courts work, I guess?
76. Kajillionaire (Miranda July)- This is another movie so intent on building atmosphere and lore that it takes too long to declare what it is. When the protagonist hits a breaking point and has to act, she has only a third of a film to grow. So whispery too.
Gina Rodriguez is the one to inject life into it. As soon as her motormouth winds up, the film slips into a different gear. The atmosphere and lore that I mentioned reeks of artifice, but her character is believably specific. Beneath a basic exterior is someone who is authentically caring but still morally compromised, beholden to the world that the other characters are suspicious of.
75. Scoob! (Tony Cervone)- The first half is sometimes clever, but it hammers home the importance of friendship while separating the friends.
The second half has some positive messaging, but your kids' movie might have a problem with scale if it involves Alexander the Great unlocking the gates of the Underworld.
My daughter loved it.
74. The Lovebirds (Michael Showalter)- If I start talking too much about this perfectly fine movie, I end up in that unfair stance of reviewing the movie I wanted, not what is actually there.* As a fan of hang-out comedies, I kind of resent that any comedy being made now has to be rolled into something more "exciting," whether it's a wrongfully accused or mistaken identity thriller or some other genre. Such is the post-Game Night world. There's a purposefully anti-climactic note that I wish The Lovebirds had ended on, but of course we have another stretch of hiding behind boats and shooting guns. Nanjiani and Rae are really charming leads though.
*- As a New Orleanian, I was totally distracted by the fake aspects of the setting too. "Oh, they walked to Jefferson from downtown? Really?" You probably won't be bothered by the locations.
73. Sonic the Hedgehog (Jeff Fowler)- In some ways the storytelling is ambitious. (I'm speaking for only myself, but I'm fine with "He's a hedgehog, and he's really fast" instead of the owl mother, teleportation backstory. Not everything has to be Tolkien.) But that ambition doesn't match the lack of ambition in the comedy, which depends upon really hackneyed setups and structures. Guiding Jim Carrey to full alrighty-then mode was the best choice anyone made.
72. Malcolm & Marie (Sam Levinson)- The stars move through these long scenes with agility and charisma, but the degree of difficulty is just too high for this movie to reach what it's going for.
Levinson is trying to capture an epic fight between a couple, and he can harness the theatrical intensity of such a thing, but he sacrifices almost all of the nuance. In real life, these knock-down-drag-outs can be circular and indirect and sad in a way that this couple's manipulation rarely is. If that emotional truth is all this movie is trying to achieve, I feel okay about being harsh in my judgment of how well it does that.
71. Beanpole (Kantemir Balagov)- Elusive in how it refuses to declare itself, forthright in how punishing it is. The whole thing might be worth it for a late dinner scene, but I'm getting a bit old to put myself through this kind of misery.
70. The Burnt Orange Heresy (Giuseppe Capotondi)- Silly in good ways until it's silly in bad ways. Elizabeth Debicki remains 6'3".
69. Everybody’s Everything (Sebastian Jones and Ramez Silyan)- As a person who listened to Lil Peep's music, I can confidently say that this documentary is overstating his greatness. His death was a significant loss, as the interview subjects will all acknowledge, but the documentary is more useful as a portrait of a certain unfocused, rapacious segment of a generation that is high and online at all times.
68. The Witches (Robert Zemeckis)- Robert Zemeckis, Kenya Barris, and Guillermo Del Toro are the credited screenwriters, and in a fascinating way, you can see the imprint of each figure on the final product. Adapting a very European story to the old wives' tales of the American South is an interesting choice. Like the Nicolas Roeg try at this material, Zemeckis is not afraid to veer into the terrifying, and Octavia Spencer's pseudo witch doctor character only sells the supernatural. From a storytelling standpoint though, it seems as if the obstacles are overcome too easily, as if there's a whole leg of the film that has been excised. The framing device and the careful myth-making of the flashback make promises that the hotel half of the film, including the abrupt ending, can't live up to.
If nothing else, Anne Hathaway is a real contender for Most On-One Performance of the year.
67. Irresistible (Jon Stewart)- Despite a sort of imaginative ending, Jon Stewart's screenplay feels more like the declarative screenplay that would get you hired for a good movie, not a good screenplay itself. It's provocative enough, but it's clumsy in some basic ways and never evades the easy joke.
For example, the Topher Grace character is introduced as a sort of assistant, then is re-introduced an hour later as a polling expert, then is shown coaching the candidate on presentation a few scenes later. At some point, Stewart combined characters into one role, but nothing got smoothed out.
ENDEARING CURIOSITIES WITH BIG FLAWS
66. Yes, God, Yes (Karen Maine)- Most people who are Catholic, including me, are conflicted about it. Most people who make movies about being Catholic hate it and have an axe to grind. This film is capable of such knowing wit and nuance when it comes to the lived-in details of attending a high school retreat, but it's more concerned with taking aim at hypocrisy in the broad way that we've seen a million times. By the end, the film is surprisingly all-or-nothing when Christian teenagers actually contain multitudes.
Part of the problem is that Karen Maine's screenplay doesn't know how naive to make the Alice character. Sometimes she's reasonably naive for a high school senior in 2001; sometimes she's comically naive so that the plot can work; and sometimes she's stupid, which isn't the same as naive.
65. Bad Boys for Life (Adil El Arbi and Bilall Fallah)- This might be the first buddy cop movie in which the vets make peace with the tech-comm youngs who use new techniques. If that's the only novelty on display here--and it is--then maybe that's enough. I laughed maybe once. Not that the mistaken identity subplot of Bad Boys 1 is genius or anything, but this entry felt like it needed just one more layer to keep it from feeling as basic as it does. Speaking of layers though, it's almost impossible to watch any Will Smith movie now without viewing it through the meta-narrative of "What is Will Smith actually saying about his own status at this point in his career?" He's serving it up to us.
I derived an inordinate amount of pleasure from seeing the old school Simpson/Bruckheimer logo.
64. The Gentlemen (Guy Ritchie)- Look, I'm not going to be too negative on a movie whose crime slang is so byzantine that it has to be explained with subtitles. That's just me. I'm a simple man. But I can tell you that I tuned out pretty hard after seven or eight double-crosses.
The bloom is off the rose a bit for Ritchie, but he can still nail a music cue. I've been waiting for someone to hit "That's Entertainment" the way he does on the end credits.
63. Bad Hair (Justin Simien)- In Bad Hair, an African-American woman is told by her boss at a music video channel in 1989 that straightening her hair is the way to get ahead; however, her weave ends up having a murderous mind of its own. Compared to that charged, witty logline, the execution of the plot itself feels like a laborious, foregone conclusion. I'm glad that Simien, a genuinely talented writer, is making movies again though. Drop the skin-care routine, Van Der Beek!
62. Greyhound (Aaron Schneider)- "If this is the type of role that Tom Hanks writes for himself, then he understands his status as America's dad--'wise as the serpent, harmless as the dove'--even better than I thought." "America's Dad! Aye aye, sir!" "At least half of the dialogue is there for texture and authenticity, not there to be understood by the audience." "Fifty percent, Captain!" "The environment looks as fake as possible, but I eventually came around to the idea that the movie is completely devoid of subtext." "No subtext to be found, sir!"
61. Mank (David Fincher)- About ten years ago, the Creative Screenwriting podcast spent an hour or so with James Vanderbilt, the writer of Zodiac and nothing else that comes close, as he relayed the creative paces that David Fincher pushed him through. Hundreds of drafts and years of collaborative work eventuated in the blueprint for Fincher's most exacting, personal film, which he didn't get a writing credit on only because he didn't seek one.
Something tells me that Fincher didn't ask for rewrites from his dead father. No matter what visuals and performances the director can coax from the script--and, to be clear, these are the worst visuals and performances of his career--they are limited by the muddy lightweight pages. There are plenty of pleasures, like the slippery election night montage or the shakily platonic relationship between Mank and Marion. But Fincher hadn't made a film in six years, and he came back serving someone else's master.
60. Tesla (Michael Almereyda)- "You live inside your head." "Doesn't everybody?"
As usual, Almereyda's deconstructions are invigorating. (No other moment can match the first time Eve Hewson's Anne fact-checks something with her anachronistic laptop.) But they don't add up to anything satisfying because Tesla himself is such an opaque figure. Driven by the whims of his curiosity without a clear finish line, the character gives Hawke something enigmatic to play as he reaches deep into a baritone. But he's too inward to lend himself to drama. Tesla feels of a piece with Almereyda's The Experimenter, and that's the one I would recommend.
59. Vitalina Varela (Pedro Costa)- I can't oversell how delicately beautiful this film is visually. There's a scene in which Vitalina lugs a lantern into a church, but we get several seconds of total darkness before that one light source carves through it and takes over part of the frame. Each composition is as intricate as it is overpowering, achieving a balance between stark and mannered.
That being said, most of the film is people entering or exiting doors. I felt very little of the haunting loss that I think I was supposed to.
58. The Rhythm Section (Reed Morano)- Call it the Timothy Hutton in The General's Daughter Corollary: If a name-actor isn't in the movie much but gets third billing, then, despite whom he sends the protagonist to kill, he is the Actual Bad Guy.
Even if the movie serves up a lot of cliche, the action and sound design are visceral. I would like to see more from Morano.
57. Red, White and Blue (Steve McQueen)- Well-made and heartfelt even if it goes step-for-step where you think it will.
Here's what I want to know though: In the academy training sequence, the police cadets have to subdue a "berserker"; that is, a wildman who swings at their riot gear with a sledgehammer. Then they get him under control, and he shakes their hands, like, "Good angle you took on me there, mate." Who is that guy and where is his movie? Is this full-time work? Is he a police officer or an independent contractor? What would happen if this exercise didn't go exactly as planned?
56. Wolfwalkers (Tomm Moore and Ross Stewart)- The visuals have an unfinished quality that reminded me of The Tale of Princess Kaguya--the center of a flame is undrawn white, and fog is just negative space. There's an underlying symmetry to the film, and its color palette changes with mood.
Narratively, it's pro forma and drawn-out. Was Riley in Inside Out the last animated protagonist to get two parents? My daughter stuck with it, but she needed a lot of context for the religious atmosphere of 17th century Ireland.
55. What She Said: The Art of Pauline Kael (Rob Garver)- The film does little more than one might expect; it's limited in the way that any visual medium is when trying to sum up a woman of letters. But as far as education for Kael's partnership with Warren Beatty or the idea of The New Yorker paying her for only six months out of the year, it was useful for me.
Although Garver isn't afraid to point to the work that made Kael divisive, it would have been nice to have one or two interview subjects who questioned her greatness, rather than the crew of Paulettes who, even when they do say something like, "Sometimes I radically disagreed with her," do it without being able to point to any specifics.
54. Beastie Boys Story (Spike Jonze)- As far as this Spike Jonze completist is concerned, this is more of a Powerpoint presentation than a movie, Beastie Boys Story still warmed my heart, making me want to fire up Paul's Boutique again and take more pictures of my buddies.
53. Tenet (Christopher Nolan)- Cool and cold, tantalizing and frustrating, loud and indistinct, Tenet comes close to Nolan self-parody, right down to the brutalist architecture and multiple characters styled like him. The setpieces grabbed me, I'll admit.
Nolan's previous film, which is maybe his best, was "about" a lot and just happened to play with time; Tenet is only about playing with time.
PRETTY GOOD MOVIES
52. Shithouse (Cooper Raiff)- "Death is ass."
There's such a thing as too naturalistic. If I wanted to hear how college freshmen really talked, I would hang out with college freshmen. But you have to take the good verisimilitude with the bad, and good verisimilitude is the mother's Pod Save America t-shirt.
There are some poignant moments (and a gonzo performance from Logan Miller) in this auspicious debut from Cooper Raiff, the writer/director/editor/star. But the second party sequence kills some of the momentum, and at a crucial point, the characters spell out some motivation that should have stayed implied.
51. Totally Under Control (Alex Gibney, Ophelia Harutyunyan, Suzanne Hillinger)- As dense and informative as any other Gibney documentary with the added flex of making it during the pandemic it is investigating.
But yeah, why am I watching this right now? I don't need more reasons to be angry with Trump, whom this film calmly eviscerates. The directors analyze Trump's narcissism first through his contradictions of medical expertise in order to protect the economy that could win him re-election. Then it takes aim at his hiring based on loyalty instead of experience. But you already knew that, which is the problem with the film, at least for now.
50. Happiest Season (Clea Duvall)- I was in the perfect mood to watch something this frothy and bouncy. Every secondary character receives a moment in the sun, and Daniel Levy gets a speech that kind of saves the film at a tipping point.
I must say though: I wanted to punch Harper in her stupid face. She is a terrible romantic partner, abandoning or betraying Abby throughout the film and dissembling her entire identity to everyone else in a way that seems absurd for a grown woman in 2020. Run away, Kristen. Perhaps with Aubrey Plaza, whom you have more chemistry with. But there I go shipping and aligning myself with characters, which only proves that this is an effective romantic comedy.
49. The Way Back (Gavin O’Connor)- Patient but misshapen, The Way Back does just enough to overcome the cliches that are sort of unavoidable considering the genre. (I can't get enough of the parent character who, for no good reason, doesn't take his son's success seriously. "Scholarship? What he's gotta do is put his nose in them books! That's why I don't go to his games. [continues moving boxes while not looking at the other character] Now if you'll excuse me while I wait four scenes before showing up at a game to prove that I'm proud of him after all...")
What the movie gets really right or really wrong in the details about coaching and addiction is a total crap-shoot. But maybe I've said too much already.
48. The Whistlers (Corneliu Porumboiu)- Porumboiu is a real artist who seems to be interpreting how much surveillance we're willing to acknowledge and accept, but I won't pretend to have understood much of the plot, the chapters or which are told out of order. Sometimes the structure works--the beguiling, contextless "high-class hooker" sequence--but I often wondered if the film was impenetrable in the way that Porumboiu wanted it to be or impenetrable in the way he didn't.
To tell you the truth, the experience kind of depressed me because I know that, in my younger days, this film is the type of thing that I would re-watch, possibly with the chronology righted, knowing that it is worth understanding fully. But I have two small children, and I'm exhausted all the time, and I kind of thought I should get some credit for still trying to catch up with Romanian crime movies in the first place.
47. Borat Subsequent Moviefilm (Jason Woliner)- I laughed too much to get overly critical, but the film is so episodic and contrived that it's kind of exhausting by the end--even though it's achieving most of its goals. Maybe Borat hasn't changed, but the way our citizens own their ugliness has.
46. First Cow (Kelly Reichardt)- Despite how little happens in the first forty minutes, First Cow is a thoughtful capitalism parable. Even though it takes about forty minutes to get going, the friendship between Cookie and King-Lu is natural and incisive. Like Reichardt's other work, the film's modest premise unfolds quite gracefully, except for in the first forty minutes, which are uneventful.
45. Les Miserables (Ladj Ly)- I loved parts of the film--the disorienting, claustrophobic opening or the quick look at the police officers' home lives, for example. But I'm not sure that it does anything very well. The needle the film tries to thread between realism and theater didn't gel for me. The ending, which is ambiguous in all of the wrong ways, chooses the theatrical. (If I'm being honest, my expectations were built up by Les Miserables' Jury Prize at Cannes, and it's a bit superficial to be in that company.)
If nothing else, it's always helpful to see how another country's worst case scenario in law enforcement would look pretty good over here.
44. Bad Education (Cory Finley)- The film feels too locked-down and small at the beginning, so intent on developing the protagonist neutrally that even the audience isn't aware of his secrets. So when he faces consequences for those secrets, there's a disconnect. Part of tragedy is seeing the doom coming, right?
When it opens up, however, it's empathetic and subtle, full of a dry irony that Finley is already specializing in after only one other feature. Geraldine Viswanathan and Allison Janney get across a lot of interiority that is not on the page.
43. The Trip to Greece (Michael Winterbottom)- By the fourth installment, you know whether you're on board with the franchise. If you're asking "Is this all there is?" to Coogan and Brydon's bickering and impressions as they're served exotic food in picturesque settings, then this one won't sway you. If you're asking "Is this all there is?" about life, like they are, then I don't need to convince you.
I will say that The Trip to Spain seemed like an enervated inflection point, at which the squad could have packed it in. The Trip to Greece proves that they probably need to keep doing this until one of them dies, which has been the subtext all along.
42. Feels Good Man (Arthur Jones)- This documentary centers on innocent artist Matt Furie's helplessness as his Pepe the Frog character gets hijacked by the alt-right. It gets the hard things right. It's able to, quite comprehensively, trace a connection from 4Chan's use of Pepe the Frog to Donald Trump's near-assuming of Pepe's ironic deniability. Director Arthur Jones seems to understand the machinations of the alt-right, and he articulates them chillingly.
The easy thing, making us connect to Furie, is less successful. The film spends way too much time setting up his story, and it makes him look naive as it pits him against Alex Jones in the final third. Still, the film is a quick ninety-two minutes, and the highs are pretty high.
41. The Old Guard (Gina Prince-Bythewood)- Some of the world-building and backstory are handled quite elegantly. The relationships actually do feel centuries old through specific details, and the immortal conceit comes together for an innovative final action sequence.
Visually and musically though, the film feels flat in a way that Prince-Bythewood's other films do not. I blame Netflix specs. KiKi Layne, who tanked If Beale Street Could Talk for me, nearly ruins this too with the child-actory way that she stresses one word per line. Especially in relief with one of our more effortless actresses, Layne is distracting.
40. The Trial of the Chicago 7 (Aaron Sorkin)- Whenever Sacha Baron Cohen's Abbie Hoffman opens his mouth, the other defendants brace themselves for his dismissive vulgarity. Even when it's going to hurt him, he can't help but shoot off at the mouth. Of course, he reveals his passionate and intelligent depths as the trial goes on. The character is the one that Sorkin's screenplay seems the most endeared to: In the same way that Hoffman can't help but be Hoffman, Sorkin can't help but be Sorkin. Maybe we don't need a speech there; maybe we don't have to stretch past two hours; maybe a bon mot diffuses the tension. But we know exactly what to expect by now. The film is relevant, astute, witty, benevolent, and, of course, in love with itself. There are a handful of scenes here that are perfect, so I feel bad for qualifying so much.
A smaller point: Daniel Pemberton has done great work in the past (Motherless Brooklyn, King Arthur, The Man from U.N.C.L.E.), but the first sequence is especially marred by his sterile soft-rock approach.
GOOD MOVIES
39. Time (Garrett Bradley)- The key to Time is that it provides very little context. Why the patriarch of this family is serving sixty years in prison is sort of besides the point philosophically. His wife and sons have to move on without him, and the tragedy baked into that fact eclipses any notion of what he "deserved." Feeling the weight of time as we switch back and forth between a kid talking about his first day of kindergarten and that same kid graduating from dentistry school is all the context we need. Time's presentation can be quite sumptuous: The drone shot of Angola makes its buildings look like crosses. Or is it X's?
At the same time, I need some context. When director Garrett Bradley withholds the reason Robert's in prison, and when she really withholds that Fox took a plea and served twelve years, you start to see the strings a bit. You could argue that knowing so little about why, all of a sudden, Robert can be on parole puts you into the same confused shoes as the family, but it feels manipulative to me. The film is preaching to the choir as far as criminal justice goes, which is fine, but I want it to have the confidence to tell its story above board.
38. Bloody Nose, Empty Pockets (Turner Ross and Bill Ross IV)- I have a barfly friend whom I see maybe once a year. When we first set up a time to meet, I kind of dread it and wonder what we'll have to talk about. Once we do get together, we trip on each other's words a bit, fumbling around with the rhythm of conversation that we mastered decades ago. He makes some kind of joke that could have been appropriate then but isn't now.
By the end of the day, hours later, we're hugging and maybe crying as we promise each other that we won't wait as long next time.
That's the exact same journey that I went on with this film.
37. Underwater (William Eubank)- Underwater is a story that you've seen before, but it's told with great confidence and economy. I looked up at twelve minutes and couldn't believe the whole table had been set. Kristen plays Ripley and projects a smart, benevolent poise.
36. The Lodge (Veronika Franz and Severin Fiala)- I prefer the grounded, manicured first half to the more fantastic second half. The craziness of the latter is only possible through the hard work of the former though. As with Fiala and Franz's previous feature, the visual rhymes and motifs get incorporated into the soup so carefully that you don't realize it until they overwhelm you in their bleak glory.
Small note: Alicia Silverstone, the male lead's first wife, and Riley Keough, his new partner, look sort of similar. I always think that's a nice note: "I could see how he would go for her."
35. Miss Americana (Lana Wilson)- I liked it when I saw it as a portrait of a person whose life is largely decided for her but is trying to carve out personal spaces within that hamster wheel. I loved it when I realized that describes most successful people in their twenties.
34. Sound of Metal (Darius Marder)- Riz Ahmed is showing up on all of the best performances of the year lists, but Sound of Metal isn't in anyone's top ten films of the year. That's about right. Ahmed's is a quiet, stubborn performance that I wish was in service of more than the straight line that we've seen before.
In two big scenes, there's this trick that Ahmed does, a piecing together of consequences with his eyes, as if he's moving through a flow chart in real time. In both cases, the character seems locked out and a little slower than he should be, which is, of course, why he's facing the consequences in the first place. To be charitable to a film that was a bit of a grind, it did make me notice a thing a guy did with his eyes.
33. Pieces of a Woman (Kornel Mundruczo)- Usually when I leave acting showcases like this, I imagine the film without the Oscar-baiting speeches, but this is a movie that specializes in speeches. Pieces of a Woman is being judged, deservedly so, by the harrowing twenty-minute take that opens the film, which is as indulgent as it is necessary. But if the unbroken take provides the "what," then the speeches provide the "why."
This is a film about reclaiming one's body when it rebels against you and when other people seek ownership of it. Without the Ellen Burstyn "lift your head" speech or the Vanessa Kirby show-stopper in the courtroom, I'm not sure any of that comes across.
I do think the film lets us off the hook a bit with the LaBoeuf character, in the sense that it gives us reasons to dislike him when it would be more compelling if he had done nothing wrong. Does his half-remembering of the White Stripes count as a speech?
32. Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom (George C. Wolfe)- This is such a play, not only in the locked-down location but also through nearly every storytelling convention: "Where are the two most interesting characters? Oh, running late? They'll enter separately in animated fashion?" But, to use the type of phrase that the characters might, "Don't hate the player; hate the game."
Perhaps the most theatrical note in this treatise on the commodification of expression is the way that, two or three times, the proceedings stop in their tracks for the piece to declare loudly what it's about. In one of those clear-outs, Boseman, who looks distractingly sick, delivers an unforgettable monologue that transports the audience into his character's fragile, haunted mind. He and Viola Davis are so good that the film sort of buckles under their weight, unsure of how to transition out of those spotlight moments and pretend that the story can start back up. Whatever they're doing is more interesting than what's being achieved overall.
31. Another Round (Thomas Vinterberg)- It's definitely the film that Vinterberg wanted to make, but despite what I think is a quietly shattering performance from Mikkelsen, Another Round moves in a bit too much of a straight line to grab me fully. The joyous final minutes hint at where it could have gone, as do pockets of Vinterberg's filmography, which seems newly tethered to realism in a way that I don't like. The best sequences are the wildest ones, like the uproarious trip to the grocery store for fresh cod, so I don't know why so much of it takes place in tiny hallways at magic hour. I give the inevitable American remake* permission to use these notes.
*- Just spitballing here. Martin: Will Ferrell, Nikolaj (Nick): Ben Stiller, Tommy: Owen Wilson, Peter: Craig Robinson
30. The Invisible Man (Leigh Whannell)- Exactly what I wanted. Exactly what I needed.
I think a less conclusive finale would have been better, but what a model of high-concept escalation. This is the movie people convinced me Whannell's Upgrade was.
29. On the Rocks (Sofia Coppola)- Slight until the Mexican sojourn, which expands the scope and makes the film even more psychosexual than before. At times it feels as if Coppola is actively simplifying, rather than diving into the race and privilege questions that the Murray character all but demands.
As for Murray, is the film 50% worse without him? 70%? I don't know if you can run in supporting categories if you're the whole reason the film exists.
28. Mangrove (Steve McQueen)- The first part of the film seemed repetitive and broad to me. But once it settled in as a courtroom drama, the characterization became more shaded, and the filmmaking itself seemed more fluid. I ended up being quite outraged and inspired.
27. Shirley (Josephine Decker)- Josephine Decker emerges as a real stylist here, changing her foggy, impressionistic approach not one bit with a little more budget. Period piece and established actors be damned--this is still as much of a reeling fever dream as Madeline's Madeline. Both pieces are a bit too repetitive and nasty for my taste, but I respect the technique.
Here's my mandatory "Elisabeth Moss is the best" paragraph. While watching her performance as Shirley Jackson, I thought about her most famous role as Peggy on Mad Men, whose inertia and need to prove herself tied her into confidence knots. Shirley is almost the opposite: paralyzed by her worldview, certain of her talent, rejecting any empathy. If Moss can inhabit both characters so convincingly, she can do anything.
26. An American Pickle (Brandon Trost)- An American Pickle is the rare comedy that could actually use five or ten extra minutes, but it's a surprisingly heartfelt and wholesome stretch for Rogen, who is earnest in the lead roles.
25. The King of Staten Island (Judd Apatow)- At two hours and fifteen minutes, The King of Staten Island is probably the first Judd Apatow film that feels like the exact right length. For example, the baggy date scene between a gracious Bill Burr and a faux-dowdy Marisa Tomei is essential, the sort of widening of perspective that something like Trainwreck was missing.
It's Pete Davidson's movie, however, and though he has never been my cup of tea, I think he's actually quite powerful in his quiet moments. The movie probes some rare territory--a mentally ill man's suspicion that he is unlovable, a family's strategic myth-making out of respect for the dead. And when Davidson shows up at the firehouse an hour and fifteen minutes in, it feels as if we've built to a last resort.
24. Swallow (Carlo Mirabella-Davis)- The tricky part of this film is communicating Hunter's despair, letting her isolation mount, but still keeping her opaque. It takes a lot of visual discipline to do that, and Claudio Mirabella-Davis is up to the task. This ends up being a much more sympathetic, expressive movie than the plot description might suggest.
(In the tie dispute, Hunter and Richie are both wrong. That type of silk--I couldn't tell how pebbled it was, but it's probably a barathea weave-- shouldn't be ironed directly, but it doesn't have to be steamed. On a low setting, you could iron the back of the tie and be fine.)
23. The Vast of Night (Andrew Patterson)- I wanted a bit more "there" there; The film goes exactly where I thought it would, and there isn't enough humor for my taste. (The predictability might be a feature, not a bug, since the film is positioned as an episode of a well-worn Twilight Zone-esque show.)
But from a directorial standpoint, this is quite a promising debut. Patterson knows when to lock down or use silence--he even cuts to black to force us to listen more closely to a monologue. But he also knows when to fill the silence. There's a minute or so when Everett is spooling tape, and he and Fay make small talk about their hopes for the future, developing the characters' personalities in what could have been just mechanics. It's also a refreshingly earnest film. No one is winking at the '50s setting.
I'm tempted to write, "If Andrew Patterson can make this with $1 million, just imagine what he can do with $30 million." But maybe people like Shane Carruth have taught us that Patterson is better off pinching pennies in Texas and following his own muse.
22. Martin Eden (Pietro Marcello)- At first this film, adapted from a picaresque novel by Jack London, seemed as if it was hitting the marks of the genre. "He's going from job to job and meeting dudes who are shaping his worldview now." But the film, shot in lustrous Super 16, won me over as it owned the trappings of this type of story, forming a character who is a product of his environment even as he transcends it. By the end, I really felt the weight of time.
You want to talk about something that works better in novels than films though? When a passionate, independent protagonist insists that a woman is the love of his life, despite the fact that she's whatever Italians call a wet blanket. She's rich, but Martin doesn't care about her money. He hates her family and friends, and she refuses to accept him or his life pursuits. She's pretty but not even as pretty as the waitress they discuss. Tell me what I'm missing here. There's archetype, and there's incoherence.
21. Bacurau (Kleber Mendonca Filho and Juliano Dornelles)- Certain images from this adventurous film will stick with me, but I got worn out after the hard reset halfway through. As entranced as I was by the mystery of the first half, I think this blood-soaked ensemble is better at asking questions than it is at answering them.
20. Let Them All Talk (Steven Soderbergh)- The initial appeal of this movie might be "Look at these wonderful actresses in their seventies getting a movie all to themselves." And the film is an interesting portrait of ladies taking stock of relationships that have spanned decades. But Soderbergh and Eisenberg handle the twentysomething Lucas Hedges character with the same openness and empathy. His early reasoning for going on the trip is that he wants to learn from older women, and Hedges nails the puppy-dog quality of a young man who would believe that. Especially in the scenes of aspirational romance, he's sweet and earnest as he brushes his hair out of his face.
Streep plays Alice Hughes, a serious author of literary fiction, and she crosses paths with Kelvin Kranz, a grinder of airport thrillers. In all of the right ways, Let Them All Talk toes the line between those two stances as an entertaining, jaunty experiment that also shoulders subtextual weight. If nothing else, it's easy to see why a cruise ship's counterfeit opulence, its straight lines at a lean, would be visually engaging to Soderbergh. You can't have a return to form if your form is constantly evolving.
19. Dick Johnson Is Dead (Kirsten Johnson)- Understandably, I don't find the subject as interesting as his own daughter does, and large swaths of this film are unsure of what they're trying to say. But that's sort of the point, and the active wrestling that the film engages in with death ultimately pays off in a transcendent moment. The jaw-dropping ending is something that only non-fiction film can achieve, and Johnson's whole career is about the search for that sort of serendipity.
18. Da 5 Bloods (Spike Lee)- Delroy Lindo is a live-wire, but his character is the only one of the principals who is examined with the psychological depth I was hoping for. The first half, with all of its present-tense flourishes, promises more than the gunfights of the second half can deliver. When the film is cooking though, it's chock full of surprises, provocations, and pride.
17. Never Rarely Sometimes Always (Eliza Hittmann)- Very quickly, Eliza Hittmann has established herself as an astute, empathetic director with an eye for discovering new talent. I hope that she gets to make fifty more movies in which she objectively follows laconic young people. But I wanted to like this one more than I did. The approach is so neutral that it's almost flat to me, lacking the arc and catharsis of her previous film, Beach Rats. I still appreciate her restraint though.
GREAT MOVIES
16. Young Ahmed (Jean-Pierre Dardenne and Luc Dardenne)- I don't think the Dardennes have made a bad movie yet, and I'm glad they turned away from the slight genre dipping of The Unknown Girl, the closest to bad that they got. Young Ahmed is a lean, daring return to form.
Instead of following an average person, as they normally do, the Dardenne Brothers follow an extremist, and the objectivity that usually generates pathos now serves to present ambiguity. Ahmed says that he is changing, that he regrets his actions, but we never know how much of his stance is a put-on. I found myself wanting him to reform, more involved than I usually am in these slices of life. Part of it is that Idir Ben Addi looks like such a normal, young kid, and the Ahmed character has most of the qualities that we say we want in young people: principles, commitment, self-worth, reflection. So it's that much more destructive when those qualities are used against him and against his fellow man.
15. World of Tomorrow Episode Three: The Absent Destinations of David Prime (Don Hertzfeldt)- My dad, a man whom I love but will never understand, has dismissed modern music before by claiming that there are only so many combinations of chords. To him, it's almost impossible to do something new. Of course, this is the type of thing that an uncreative person would say--a person not only incapable of hearing the chords that combine notes but also unwilling to hear the space between the notes. (And obviously, that's the take of a person who doesn't understand that, originality be damned, some people just have to create.)
Anyway, that attitude creeps into my own thinking more than I would like, but then I watch something as wholly original as World of Tomorrow Episode Three. The series has always been a way to pile sci-fi ideas on top of each other to prove the essential truths of being and loving. And this one, even though it achieves less of a sense of yearning than its predecessor, offers even more devices to chew on. Take, for example, the idea that Emily sends her message from the future, so David's primitive technology can barely handle it. In order to move forward with its sophistication, he has to delete any extraneous skills for the sake of computer memory. So out of trust for this person who loves him, he has to weigh whether his own breathing or walking can be uninstalled as a sacrifice for her. I thought that we might have been done describing love, but there it is, a new metaphor. Mixing futurism with stick figures to get at the most pure drive possible gave us something new. It's called art, Dad.
14. On the Record (Kirby Dick and Amy Ziering)- We don't call subjects of documentaries "stars" for obvious reasons, but Drew Dixon kind of is one. Her honesty and wisdom tell a complete story of the #MeToo movement. Kirby Dick and Amy Ziering take their time developing her background at first, not because we need to "gain sympathy" or "establish credibility" for a victim of sexual abuse, but because showing her talent and enthusiasm for hip-hop A&R makes it that much more tragic when her passion is extinguished. Hell, I just like the woman, so spending a half-hour on her rise was pleasurable in and of itself.
This is a gut-wrenching, fearless entry in what is becoming Dick and Ziering's raison d'etre, but its greatest quality is Dixon's composed reflection. She helped to establish a pattern of Russell Simmons's behavior, but she explains what happened to her in ways I had never heard before.
13. David Byrne’s American Utopia (Spike Lee)- I'm often impressed by the achievements that puzzle me: How did they pull that off? But I know exactly how David Byrne pulled off the impish but direct precision of American Utopia: a lot of hard work.
I can't blame Spike Lee for stealing a page from Demme's Stop Making Sense: He denies us a close-up of any audience members until two-thirds of the way through, when we get someone in absolute rapture.
12. One Night in Miami... (Regina King)- We've all cringed when a person of color is put into the position of speaking on behalf of his or her entire race. But the characters in One Night in Miami... live in that condition all the time and are constantly negotiating it. As Black public figures in 1964, they know that the consequences of their actions are different, bigger, than everyone else's. The charged conversations between Malcolm X and Sam Cooke are not about whether they can live normal lives. They're way past that. The stakes are closer to Sam Cooke arguing that his life's purpose aligns with the protection and elevation of African-Americans while Malcolm X argues that those pursuits should be the same thing. Late in the movie, Cassius Clay leaves the other men, a private conversation, to talk to reporters, a public conversation. But the film argues that everything these men do is always already public. They're the most powerful African-Americans in the country, but their lives are not their own. Or not only their own.
It's true that the first act has the clunkiness and artifice of a TV movie, but once the film settles into the motel room location and lets the characters feed off one another, it's gripping. It's kind of unfair for a movie to get this many scenes of Leslie Odom Jr. singing, but I'll take it.
11. Saint Frances (Alex Thompson)- Rilke wrote, "Perhaps everything terrible is in its deepest being something helpless that wants help from us." The characters' behavior in Saint Frances--all of these fully formed characters' behavior--made me think of that quotation. When they lash out at one another, even at their nastiest, the viewer has a window into how they're expressing pain they can't verbalize. The film is uneven in its subtlety, but it's a real showcase for screenwriter and star Kelly O'Sullivan, who is unflinching and dynamic in one of the best performances of the year. Somebody give her some of the attention we gave to Zach Braff for God's sake.
10. Boys State (Jesse Moss and Amanda McBaine)- This documentary is kind of a miracle from a logistical standpoint. From casting interviews beforehand, lots of editing afterwards, or sly note-taking once the conference began, McBaine and Moss happened to select the four principals who mattered the most at the convention, then found them in rooms full of dudes wearing the same tucked-in t-shirt. By the way, all of the action took place over the course of one week, and by definition, the important events are carved in half.
To call Boys State a microcosm of American politics is incorrect. These guys are forming platforms and voting in elections. What they're doing is American politics, so when they make the same compromises and mistakes that active politicians do, it produces dread and disappointment. So many of the boys are mimicking the political theater that they see on TV, and that sweaty sort of performance is going to make a Billy Mitchell out of this kid Ben Feinstein, and we'll be forced to reckon with how much we allow him to evolve as a person. This film is so precise, but what it proves is undeniably messy. Luckily, some of these seventeen-year-olds usher in hope for us all.
If nothing else, the film reveals the level to which we're all speaking in code.
9. The Nest (Sean Durkin)- In the first ten minutes or so of The Nest, the only real happy minutes, father and son are playing soccer in their quaint backyard, and the father cheats to score on a children's net before sliding on the grass to rub in his victory. An hour later, the son kicks the ball around by himself near a regulation goal on the family's massive property. The contrast is stark and obvious, as is the symbolism of the dead horse, but that doesn't mean it's not visually powerful or resonant.
Like Sean Durkin's earlier film, Martha Marcy May Marlene, the whole of The Nest is told with detail of novelistic scope and an elevation of the moment. A snippet of radio that mentions Ronald Reagan sets the time period, rather than a dateline. One kid saying "Thanks, Dad" and another kid saying, "Thanks, Rory" establishes a stepchild more elegantly than any other exposition might.
But this is also a movie that does not hide what it means. Characters usually say exactly what is on their minds, and motivations are always clear. For example, Allison smokes like a chimney, so her daughter's way of acting out is leaving butts on the window sill for her mother to find. (And mother and daughter both definitely "act out" their feelings.) On the other hand, Ben, Rory's biological son, is the character least like him, so these relationships aren't too directly parallel. Regardless, Durkin uses these trajectories to cast a pall of familial doom.
8. Sorry We Missed You (Sean Durkin)- Another precisely calibrated empathy machine from Ken Loach. The overwhelmed matriarch, Abby, is a caretaker, and she has to break up a Saturday dinner to rescue one of her clients, who wet herself because no one came to help her to the bathroom. The lady is embarrassed, and Abby calms her down by saying, "You mean more to me than you know." We know enough about Abby's circumstances to realize that it's sort of a lie, but it's a beautiful lie, told by a person who cares deeply but is not cared for.
Loach's central point is that the health of a family, something we think of as immutable and timeless, is directly dependent upon the modern industry that we use to destroy ourselves. He doesn't have to be "proven" relevant, and he didn't plan for Covid-19 to point to the fragility of the gig economy, but when you're right, you're right.
7. Lovers Rock (Steve McQueen)- swear to you I thought: "This is an impeccable depiction of a great house party. The only thing it's missing is the volatile dude who scares away all the girls." And then the volatile dude who scares away all the girls shows up.
In a year short on magic, there are two or three transcendent moments, but none of them can equal the whole crowd singing along to "Silly Games" way after the song has ended. Nothing else crystallizes the film's note of celebration: of music, of community, of safe spaces, of Black skin. I remember moments like that at house parties, and like all celebrations, they eventually make me sad.
6. Crip Camp: A Disability Revolution (Nicole Newnham and James Lebrecht)- I held off on this movie because I thought that I knew what it was. The setup was what I expected: A summer camp for the disabled in the late '60s takes on the spirit of the time and becomes a haven for people who have not felt agency, self-worth, or community anywhere else. But that's the right-place-right-time start of a story that takes these figures into the '80s as they fight for their rights.
If you're anything like my dumb ass, you know about 504 accommodations from the line on a college syllabus that promises equal treatment. If 2020 has taught us anything though, it's that rights are seized, not given, and this is the inspiring story of people who unified to demand what they deserved. Judy Heumann is a civil rights giant, but I'm ashamed to say I didn't know who she was before this film. If it were just a history lesson that wasn't taught in school, Crip Camp would still be valuable, but it's way more than that.
5. Palm Springs (Max Barbakow)- When explaining what is happening to them, Andy Samberg's Nyles twirls his hand at Cristin Milioti's Sara and says, "It's one of those infinite time-loop scenarios." Yeah, one of those. Armed with only a handful of fictional examples, she and the audience know exactly what he means, and the continually inventive screenplay by Andy Siara doesn't have to do any more explaining. In record time, the film accelerates into its premise, involves her, and sets up the conflict while avoiding the claustrophobia of even Groundhog Day. That economy is the strength that allows it to be as funny as it is. By being thrifty with the setup, the savings can go to, say, the couple crashing a plane into a fiery heap with no consequences.
In some accidental ways, this is, of course, a quarantine romance as well. Nyles and Sara frustratingly navigate the tedious wedding as if they are play-acting--which they sort of are--then they push through that sameness to grow for each other, realizing that dependency is not weakness. The best relationships are doing the same thing right now.
Although pointedly superficial--part of the point of why the couple is such a match--and secular--I think the notion of an afterlife would come up at least once--Palm Springs earns the sincerity that it gets around to. And for a movie ironic enough to have a character beg to be impaled so that he doesn't have to sit in traffic, that's no small feat.
4. The Assistant (Kitty Green)- A wonder of Bressonian objectivity and rich observation, The Assistant is the rare film that deals exclusively with emotional depth while not once explaining any emotions. One at a time, the scrape of the Kleenex box might not be so grating, the long hallway trek to the delivery guy might not be so tiring, but this movie gets at the details of how a job can destroy you in ways that add up until you can't even explain them.
3. Promising Young Woman (Emerald Fennell)- In her most incendiary and modern role, Carey Mulligan plays Cassie, which is short for Cassandra, that figure doomed to tell truths that no one else believes. The web-belted boogeyman who ruined her life is Al, short for Alexander, another Greek who is known for his conquests. The revenge story being told here--funny in its darkest moments, dark in its funniest moments--is tight on its surface levels, but it feels as if it's telling a story more archetypal and expansive than that too.
An exciting feature debut for its writer-director Emerald Fennell, the film goes wherever it dares. Its hero has a clear purpose, and it's not surprising that the script is willing to extinguish her anger halfway through. What is surprising is the way it renews and muddies her purpose as she comes into contact with half-a-dozen brilliant one- or two-scene performances. (Do you think Alfred Molina can pull off a lawyer who hates himself so much that he can't sleep? You would be right.)
Promising Young Woman delivers as an interrogation of double standards and rape culture, but in quiet ways it's also about our outsized trust in professionals and the notion that some trauma cannot be overcome.
INSTANT CLASSICS
2. Soul (Pete Docter)- When Pete Docter's Up came out, it represented a sort of coronation for Pixar: This was the one that adults could like unabashedly. The one with wordless sequences and dead children and Ed Asner in the lead. But watching it again this week with my daughter, I was surprised by how high-concept and cloying it could be. We choose not to remember the middle part with the goofy dog stuff.
Soul is what Up was supposed to be: honest, mature, stirring. And I don't mean to imply that a family film shouldn't make any concessions to children. But Soul, down to the title, never compromises its own ambition. Besides Coco, it's probably the most credible character study that Pixar has ever made, with all of Joe's growth earned the hard way. Besides Inside Out, it's probably the wittiest comedy that Pixar has ever made, bursting with unforced energy.
There's a twitter fascination going around about Dez, the pigeon-figured barber character whose scene has people gushing, "Crush my windpipe, king" or whatever. Maybe that's what twitter does now, but no one fantasized about any characters in Up. And I count that as progress.
1. I’m Thinking of Ending Things (Charlie Kaufman)- After hearing that our name-shifting protagonist moonlights as an artist, a no-nonsense David Thewlis offers, "I hope you're not an abstract artist." He prefers "paintings that look like photographs" over non-representational mumbo-jumbo. And as Jessie Buckley squirms to try to think of a polite way to talk back, you can tell that Charlie Kaufman has been in the crosshairs of this same conversation. This morose, scary, inscrutable, expressionist rumination is not what the Netflix description says it is at all, and it's going to bother nice people looking for a fun night in. Thank God.
The story goes that Steven Spielberg and George Lucas, when constructing Raiders of the Lost Ark, sought to craft a movie that was "only the good parts" with little of the clunky setup that distracted from action. What we have here is a Charlie Kaufman movie with only the Charlie Kaufman moments, less interested than ever before at holding one's hand. The biting humor is here, sometimes aimed at philistines like the David Thewlis character above, sometimes at the niceties that we insist upon. The lonely horror of everyday life is here, in the form of missed calls from oneself or the interruption of an inner monologue. Of course, communicating the overwhelming crush of time, both unknowable and familiar, is the raison d'etre.
A new pet motif seems to be the way that we don't even own our own knowledge. The Young Woman recites "Bonedog" by Eva H.D., which she claims/thinks she wrote, only to find Jake's book open to that page, next to a Pauline Kael book that contains a Woman Under the Influence review that she seems to have internalized later. When Jake muses about Wordsworth's "Lucy Poems," it starts as a way to pass the time, then it becomes a way to lord his education over her, then it becomes a compliment because the subject resembles her, then it becomes a way to let her know that, in the grand scheme of things, she isn't that special at all. This film jerks the viewer through a similar wintry cycle and leaves him with his own thoughts. It's not a pretty picture, but it doesn't look like anything else.
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7 Day Prayer Miracle Review Amanda Ross (2020)
7 Day Prayer Miracle by Amanda Ross
Does it Work?
Almost everyone is familiar with the word Prayer, as well as the concept of Prayer. So when we come across someone offering a 7 Day Prayer Miracle, it is possible to have some questions popping up in the minds of people. Does it work? Is it effective? Why it is so popular? So I thought of bringing this blog 7 Day Prayer Miracle Review — Does it work?
So before we proceed, here is a synopsis about the product:·
Product: 7 Day Prayer Miracle Review·
Author: Amanda Ross·
Bonus: Yes·
Official Website: 7dayprayermiracle
What Will You Get From 7 Day Prayer Miracle?
Here in 7 Day Prayer Miracle coaching, you get a shocking tragedy that manifests itself in a great blessing.
It contains a prayer composed of four sentences. This helps approximately many ordinary people to highlight the miracles of health, finances, and relationships.
This miracle program gets related to the secrets of Archangel Michael. Hence, you get a blazing stream of miracles.
You get heavenly wisdom to show the fairy tale. This helps to choose the best pair of dreams.
It helps to boost your life. And you can spread your wings and move on to the next level.
You experience good, irreversible changes in your life by this guidance. There is no place for negativity in your life.
>>> Learn More About 7 Day Prayer Miracle <<<
Manifesting Miracles by Using Prayer
When The Secret first came out, it renewed hope in millions of people for manifesting the things that would make their lives more livable. A few years on, most of those millions have lost hope, again. The “Law of Attraction” seemed to be missing something.
More than 2,500 years ago, the Prophet Daniel discovered a method of prayer that worked miracles and gave him prophetic visions of the future. Not only was he able to save his own life and that of all the wise men of Babylon, he told the king what he had dreamed and then told him what the dream meant.
We now know why the Law of Attraction works when it does. We also know why the prayers of most people don’t work. This knowledge is power — the power to manifest miracles at will. The 7 Day Prayer Miracle program contains distilled wisdom that details the differences between the two halves of reality so you can know where you stand in relationship to heaven.
Never before have we had such clarity in understanding about how prayer and miracles work. Yes, this is exciting stuff.
Imagine taking the guesswork out of your life. Imagine setting a path and having it appear right in front of your eyes. Prayer done the right way is the most powerful tool we could ever imagine.
>>> Tap or Click Here to Start the 7 Day Prayer Miracle <<<
How the Course Can Help You
Well, the course has:
1. Verified Techniques:
The big problem we’ve had with programs like “positive thinking” or “law of attraction” is that they remained vague on how to get to the desired state of mind. There was too much “pie-in-the-sky,” feel-good stuff that didn’t have a sufficient connection to the real world.
The 7 Day Prayer Miracle requires that you develop and exercise the ability to achieve the proper feelings for delivering prayers that match your conscious thoughts. The course shows you exactly how to do this with several, step-by-step exercises. This has been the area of disconnect in so many other programs
The exercises in this course raise your critical awareness of your environment and your own internal feelings so you can know when you’re aiming your prayer correctly.
2. Establishes Within You the Proper Skills:
The reason why the 7 Day Prayer Miracle works and has so many enthusiastic testimonials is because of the deep, spiritual understanding behind it — an understanding grounded in science and critical thinking.
No matter what your starting point, you will find yourself moving further from “lack” all the way to “abundance” — not merely physical abundance, but spiritual abundance of unconditional love, utter humility, perfect responsibility and fearless confidence. The map has been laid out. All you have to do is to walk the path.
The 7 Day Prayer Miracle is not only about wealth, health and relationships. It repairs the basic issues in your thinking and attitudes that would otherwise prevent effective prayer and, all too often, result in self-sabotaging behavior that spoils any gains you may make. All of these pitfalls have been handled.
Needless to say, the spiritual half of reality has its own rules and quite often doesn’t work at all like the physical half. This program is the manual for understanding what’s different and how to use those differences to your own benefit.
Because we each have our own set of bad habits, the course book covers a broad range of exercises to strengthen your awareness of your own thoughts, attitudes, intentions and — most importantly — your subconscious “feeling” attention. The 7 Day Prayer Miracle does these things far better than any book or program we’ve seen before.
Are you a Book Lover?
5+1 Stories That Prove Miracles Actually Happen:
Tap or Click Here to Get Free eBook
3. Proper Preparation:
No amount of thinking will ever accomplish anything truly worthwhile. Thought is a useful tool, but it’s only the starting point. And you can’t fix a great dinner in a dirty kitchen.
Bad habits and bad attitudes can cloud your spiritual vision and prevent your message from reaching heaven.
It’s a bit like 50 very loud people shouting while you’re trying to talk to someone on your cell phone. Sometimes, you can’t even hear yourself think.
The 7 Day Prayer Miracle helps you clear out not only bad habits, but also the daily garbage of stuck attention on little crimes we all commit from time to time — like being late for work, not taking out the garbage, forgetting about a commitment we’ve made, and more.
Becoming more aware of our stuck attention points, we can actively clean them up and ensure that our prayers make a direct, clear connection to heaven.
4. Reliability and Dependability:
By having you acquaint yourself more thoroughly with your own mind, ego and spirit, you will find yourself capable of using every part of each prayer with precision skill and powerful, spiritual effect.
Like a ship finally allowed to leave sight of land, you will enter spiritual territory you never knew existed. You will come to think of your body as merely your current vessel. And the control switches of physical reality will seem as real and natural as any physical device you’ve ever mastered.
>>> Tap or Click Here to Discover the Magical 4 Sentence Prayer That Instantly Grants Your Heart’s Fiercest Desires <<<
The Course Contents of 7 Day Miracle
Learn how to Grabbing The Attention of Heaven ( The ebook that gives you a crash course on your relationship to the spiritual world, to God and to His angels, and how to exercise your ability to connect directly to heaven).
· A Prayer Journal (a PDF journal that includes 7 prayers for 7 days, designed to give you miracle results).·
· Divine Hearing — How to Recognize Crucial Messages from Your Angels (The ebook that helps you recognize messages from your angels).
· Divine Numbers — How to Interpret Angelic Sequences and Unleash Their Blessings (ebook that helps you interpret sequences of numbers and individual numbers like 11:11, 555, etc).
· The Prayer of Daniel (a handy, 1-page reprint of the biblical prayer that Prophet Daniel was using to achieve his miraculous results. This is the template upon which all effective prayer is based).
· A Song of Shifts (MP3 file, angelic music, using the “miracle frequency.” If you like, this can be played while you are performing your own prayers to help enter the theta wave band of meditative thought — the prayerful state of mind)
· Chances are you would be quite amazed to have so much content included for such a reasonable price.
>>> Tap or Click Here to Start the 7 Day Prayer Miracle <<<
Features of the 7 Day Prayer Miracle Course·
When you have the power of prayer, you never have to be worried again.
· Once you learn how to pray, prosperity flows in to you from an infinite source
· The 7 Day Prayer Miracle shows you how to choose the right option
· You learn to cultivate the right feelings all the time. When you learn to have the right feeling, things seem to go very right.
· Life suddenly becomes perfect, almost all the time.
· With prayer you can invite better health and healing for your body
· Boost Your Love Life With Prayer
>>> Tap or Click Here to Discover the Magical 4 Sentence Prayer That Instantly Grants Your Heart’s Fiercest Desires <<<
7 Day Prayer Miracle Testimonials
From the website of 7 Day Prayer Miracle, here is a reproduction of the testimonials of some of the individuals:
“I was only 5 days away from being declared a bankrupt. Almost all my savings gone. I then stumbled on to Amanda’s teaching. Just 2 prayers later, the bank actually cancelled my debt. Holy smokes, this works!” — Leanne R.
“I had terrible, terrible fights with my husband and I was on the verge of leaving him… Then one day I stumbled on to Amanda’s writings. I consumed it, prayed the prayers and now not only has my marriage been restored — the relationship sizzles in a way not seen since the honeymoon.” — Jane A.
“I’d always wanted to connect to the divine and talk to angels, but I never could. After the 7 Day Prayer Miracle, it was almost a suffocating blanket was removed. I can even now feel the breath of God and delve into the secrets of the universe.” — May R.
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val, this is my pitch for you to listen to bring it on, because i need someone to talk about it with
1 - the music is written by famous theatre people tom kitt and amanda green (who wrote next to normal) and lin-manuel miranda (and there are hidden hamilton refernces! like two but still!)
2 - trans rep, poc rep, plus size rep, we got it all
3 - it stars taylor louderman (mean girls), elle mclemore (heathers), kate rockwell (mean girls), ariana debose (a bronx tale), and all in all some very cool and talented people so yeah
4 - the choreography manages to blend together hip-hop and actual. cheerleading stunts. and it works (im still mad they lost the tony for best choreography)
so yeah. bring it on my beloved
ahh that sounds so cool!! i’ve actually listened to the opening song/killer instinct and plan to listen to it later when i’ve got time! tysm for the rec!!
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I saw your comments about country music on the Chicks thread and I’m curious about your opinion. I grew up on country music and feel like “9/11 killed country” is pretty valid. But I’d love to hear your take because I miss it [country music].
Hi! So, my major issue with the “9/11 killed country music” post, as someone who listens to a ton of musical genres but has both a history of and soft spot for country, is that it’s a reductive, cherrypicking way to define an entire massive genre based on a handful of individual songs and high-profile artists that had their heyday at this point nearly two decades ago (Toby Keith, Big & Rich, etc.). It’s a very slanted read on pop radio country, and it’s not even remotely accurate to quantifying the broader genre.
It’s just bizarre that people allow their idea of the whole genre to be molded by a spate of reactionary right-wing songs that found traction immediately after 9/11 and then largely lost dominance in the genre. Most country songs on the radio are not about jingoism - they’re still about a lover done you wrong, or drinking after a hard day’s work, or finding happiness without much money, or teenagers in love, or about the tragedies of alcoholism and domestic abuse, or appreciating your small town, as so much of this genre has always been. If you look at the top 10 right now, there isn’t a patriot song in the whole thing (although two of the songs have overtly Christian references, but that’s always been part of country music too). The militaristic patriotism songs tend to just be one or two songs a year that end up in heavy rotation around the fourth of July and in September, but they get outsized attention comparatively because they’re so offensively grating.
And even after 9/11, for the last two decades most country songs on the radio still haven’t been “nationalist pop with twang”. Yes, in the 2000’s we had “Courtesy of the Red White and Blue” and “Where Were You When the World Stopped Turning” and “American Soldier”, but this was also LGBT+ supporter Shania Twain’s* and avowed Democrat Tim McGraw’s imperial phases, the era of “Before He Cheats” and “Concrete Angel” and “Red Ragtop”, the years that made a Blake Shelton song about breaking out of prison his calling card and gave Miranda Lambert a massive hit with a song about burning her abuser’s house down.
This isn’t to say that country is progressive. Country music has a major problem with being dominated by straight white men, and even straight white women spent several of the last years underrepresented** (to say nothing of LGBT+ artists and artists of color). But that issue predates 9/11, as does the whitewashing of country’s history; the aforementioned Ken Burns documentary does go into how white country musicians forced black musicians out of the scene and erased their accomplishments going back decades before 2001. “Proud to Be an American” and “God Bless the USA”, for the record, were recorded in 1980’s.
Country, as a genre, does lean more conservative than many other genres, but it still holds a wide array of political viewpoints, even on the pop charts. I’m not just talking about indie alt-country darlings, although I’ll get to those in a minute - even pop country megastars are a varied bunch. Eric Church, who currently has a hit on the top 10, just dropped a scathing track called “Stick That in Your Country Song” that cusses out underfunding schools and mass incarceration; Luke Bryan got a #1 hit in 2017 with a chorus that included “I believe you love who you love and ain’t nothing you should ever be ashamed of”; Carrie Underwood pinned an entire album and tour cycle around a single about escaping domestic abuse and recently released a song criticizing gun proliferation; Kacey Musgraves won a CMA for her hit single where she criticizes slut-shaming and encourages women to “kiss lots of boys or kiss lots of girls if that’s something you’re into”, then she won a Grammy for an album where she sings about smoking weed and dedicates an empowerment anthem to the LGBT+ community; Miley Cyrus had an explicitly bisexual song on her most recent “back to her roots” country album; Tim McGraw discussed running for governor of Tennessee as a Democrat and threw his support behind Obama way back during Obama’s 2008 campaign. I’ve been relatively unplugged from country radio for the last few years, but this is all stuff relatively off the top of my head.
And that moves us to alt-country. I die a little inside whenever someone says that they “just mean radio country” when they say they “hate country music”, because alt-country is just the tits. It just is. It’s the best. If someone says they listen to rock music, we don’t assume they only mean Nickelback and Shinedown - and yet somehow we’ve shut country out so much that we don’t even consider that there’s an entire world of the genre beyond what charts - and that world is rich and powerful and thoughtful and as valid a form of music as any other genre. Some favorites contemporary alt-country artists of mine (including some songs about immigration, opiate addiction, protesting war, sexism, agricultural exploitation, homophobia, one bashing Trump directly and even one about female cunnilingus): Courtney Marie Andrews, Ruston Kelly, Tyler Childers, Margo Price, Jason Isbell, Colter Wall, Ian Noe, Kathleen Edwards, Lydia Loveless, Lori McKenna, Amanda Shires, Ashley Monroe, Lucinda Williams, Over the Rhine, Samantha Crain, Shooter Jennings, Cam, John Moreland, Chris Stapleton, Lindi Ortega, Lavender Country, Cody Belew, Honey Harper, Lera Lynn, Nina Nastasia, Patty Griffin, Holly Williams.
The problem with the “9/11 killed country” attitude, to me, is that it’s a stance that requires limited knowledge of country that happened after 9/11 and a selective memory for the country that existed before 9/11. Jingoist country songs existed and found massive success before 9/11; more progressive country songs existed and found success after 9/11. Contrary to what people on tumblr seem to believe, the genre of country music was not just outlaw country, “Jolene” and Woodie Guthrie folk songs until Toby Keith came along; it was already highly Christian/gospel-influenced and highly patriarchal. And it was already full of goofy songs about getting drunk and partying and driving tractors, the predecessors to “bro country”.
I think, personally, we lose so much by centering “Courtesy of the Red White and Blue” and Florida Georgia Line as the first things we think of when we think about country music, because those songs and acts aren’t representative of the genre, or even of the pop country charts. We lose a lot because we lose sight of all the fantastic progressive or apolitical music in the genre, and we lose a lot because we ignore the sins of pre-9/11 country and the opportunity to critique its history of whitewashing, heteronormativity and cultural Christianity by likening it to some sort of good ol’ days.
Thank you for letting me ramble!
*I’m aware of Shania’s ignorant-ass Trump comments, but those reflect more recent political developments for her and came with a hasty retraction.
**Although lol the pop, rock and rap charts have all been brutal to women for the last several years.
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First Reactions To Logan’s Playlist
K first song let’s do this
White and Nerdy-Weird Al Yankovic
Wtf this song was definitely Joan’s idea I mean who else would think of ‘White and Nerdy’ for Logan
Is this like canon he listens to this stuff or like songs about him???
Not Perfect-Tim Minchin
TIM MINCHIN
Bo Burnham better be on Logan's playlist
#deep
Is this about the mindpalace/inside of Thomas’ head??? Cause like???? Ouch???? I think????
Lol nvm it’s not sad lmao
I take back my take back it is sad
So this could be literally “in his mind” or it could be figurative and it’s really messing with my funky flow
Streaks-ANIMA!
Cool instrumental
Love the voice sounds a little like MARINA and Regina Spektor
Oh no I’m two lines in and I can tell it’s gonna be sad
OH NO CONFORMITY RELATED ANGST AHHHHH
Wow Logan is just out here being relatable isn’t he smh 😔👊
"Cause you're a smart kid, but you're still a kid" LOGAN REALLY BE OUT HERE BEING RELATABLE ON MAIN
The Elements-Tom Lehrer
Sounds like what piano class would sound like if I took piano class
Something you would listen to in science class
Bop
Medicine-STRFCKR
A Fever You Can't Sweat Out vibes
Lmao nvm
Gonna go look up the lyrics rn brb
A sad bop
Philosophy cool
Human-Tank And The Bangas
Logan playing this to comfort himself because this singer is the only person who has ever told him this
WHO HURT LOGAN WITH THEIR WORDS
LOGAN THE HEART SKIPPING COMMENT ARE YOU OKAY IM GIVING YOU A HUG
GUYS LOGAN IS TRYING TO CONVINCE HIMSELF THAT HE MATTERS IM NOT OKAY
Last???? Relationship???
Okay I'm not a shipper BUT my theorist analysis obsessed brain is just SCREAMING about Roman and Patton
Observation: Logan is probably atheistic and this song covers God a lot. I don't have a conclusion or anything just pointing that out
This woman do be calming tho like yes I'm beautiful yes I'm special thank you
Okay so I already knew Logan wasn't okay but he 100% isn't okay
Fittet Happier-Radiohead
K two words in and I can tell this is gonna be sad here we go
Employees? Or maybe…other sides?
Minor key ok
SELF HARM ISNT OKAY
"WILL NOT CRY IN PUBLIC" NONONONO
So I heard of a good therapist just downtown-
The Watchtower-The Dø
I paused it cause I need a second after the last one
Guys as someone who dissosiates a lot I think Logan might be dissosiating
Dissosiating to protect himself from his emotions
Y'all just trust me in this one
Coming for the TØP brand I see
K ready to start again here we go
Fire beat I'm vibing with it
Is he trying to distance himself from his emotions to try and perform his tasks better like watching from a Watchtower???
This is the first character I've seen that might dissosiate which only means one thing
I'm gonna be projecting an unholy amount in my fanfiction
"No one in particular" hon who hurt you
City Lights=Emotions (which he considers distractions)??? Maybe??
I'm a William Finn fan come on this isn't my first rodeo
Art Is Dead-Bo Burnham
BO BURNHAM I WAS RIGHT
We all love some good Imposter Syndrome (tm)! :D
This gives Learning New Things About Ourselves' a whole new meaning
Ngl this is the first time I heard the degrading of the piano at the end and I'm here for it
In My Mind-Amanda Palmer
Oop we LOVE setting up impossible expectations for yourself to the point you have a cripplingly horrid self esteem! :D
Logan I've done this before and trust me it isn't worth it the mental breakdowns are too taxing
I'll do it when I'm older=I'm never gonna get around to it
I don't wanna be the person I wanna be either
Why do I perfectly understand every lyric am I ok
Live!!! While you!!!! Can!!!!
At least there's a happy ending
Okay so I've decided that once I'm done I'm gonna make a list of songs I think would fit in the playlist
Algorythym-Childish Gambino
K its spelled incorrectly get ready for some metaphors my dudes
Intro is cool definitely very very Logan WOAH OKAY CHAIN SMOKER
Gonna go look up lyrics I don't understand shit
The chorus sounds like Thanksgiving at my Aunt's house where like 100+ African American relatives blast house music and dance until their feet falls off
Nvm no it doesn't
GO OFF
ELPHABA BETTER WATCH OUT CHILDISH GAMBINO IS COMING FOR YOUR BELT
Adlibs are everything
Letter C-Zach Sherwin
This gives off the same vibes as that one pickle video by Charlie Puth
Roman vs Logan rap battle but it's this
I don't really see why this is related but sure
Time Adventure-The Marcus Hedgehog
Nostalgiaaaaaa
Okay Logan has too many songs talking about one (1) person who is it
I have a gut feeling that it's about Thomas and how Logan used to be enough "back then" but now he thinks he's not cause like let's be honest when was the last time someone gave Logan a strong sincere thank you for all that he does????Excluding DWIT (which doesn't really count in my opinion cause they said he was cool, not like an integral and arguably the most important and powerful side) nobody really appreciates Logan???? Hugs???
Anyway plz ignore this is just how my brain works
K next song
The Breach-clipping.
OKAY SLOW DOWN IM GONNA LOOK UP LYRICS
Is this Daveed Diggs???? I haven't listened to Hamilton in like forever is this Daveed Diggs???
LITERALLY PERFECY PARRALLEL TO LOGAN AND THE SIDES
Sound effects
Really just gonna fry my eardrums like that huh
What I Do For U-Ra Ra Riot
Okay scrap anything and everything I said about it being the sides Logan is 100% talking about Character!Thomas
Erase Me-Ben Folds Five
Ooh this intro reminds me of this one particular musical songs but I don't remember which one
Wait have I listened to this before????
I've listened to this before!
Okay I need to stop being distracted
NOOOOOO don't Erase Yourself!!!!
Logan really just do be having no Self Esteem don't he
Okay so theory: Logan didn't pop up in person in the last video because his eyes were too red from crying
I have 0 evidence so it's not a very good theory but…
Just throwing it out there
One More Time with Feeling-Regina Spektor
Oh no it's Regina Spektor
Oh no I'm gonna cry
Okay so Logan doesnt wanna block of all emotion, only permit some to show???? But most of the time block everything????
Did I get that???
Nobody!!!! Thanks!!!! Logan!!!!
Awww he just wants love and recognition
Tbh this sounds a lot like Roman they have so much in common despite their constant arguing
Galaxy Song-Monty Python
Ooh Monty Python
I haven't listened to Monty Python so I sadly don't know the context
Really just dissing all of the other sides aren't we
Can't really blame him tho
Very scientific
"Yeau~"
Sweet with dark undertones. Love it.
Equation-Hans Zimmer
Later I'm gonna check the equations if they're correct XD
Sunrise-In The Heights
!!!!!!
WHO???!!!!!
K to this is one of my favorite love songs ever it's just so sweet and as someone who's bilingual the concept is just amazingly wonderful so yeah I may be freaking out
Also because WHO??!!
Okay I said I wasn't a shipper but let's be honest this is probably about Roman not romantically but like
OR MAYBE JANUS???
IM SO CONFUSED
But Logan is definitely Nina in this situation it just fits so well with her character for the same reasons I really wanna play her (but never will cause I'm exactly 0% Latin American smh) yeah the pressures to be the smartest and then it backfiring horribly and oh God what if Inùtil is also in the playlist ahhhh
Okay moving on
Lifeboat-Heathers
WHAT
NO
NO
CONFORMITY RELATED ANGST LOGAN STOP BEING RELATABLE AHHHH
IS THIS CAPTAIN THOMAS??? THE OTHER SIDES AS A WHOLE??? AN ABSTRACT CONCEPT???
IM NOT OKAY
Bohemian Groove-Will Connolly
Okay I'm still not recovered from the last song but I need to continue or else I'm never gonna finish this playlist
Eeecccchhhhhoooo
Your friends haven't surpassed you Logan you belong with them okay????
Emptiness despite success??? Millennial who???
Vibing with it but also are you okay
Nvm I know the answer already
Hug All Ur Friends-Cavetown
Okay so Logan is a Cavetown gay noted
Self validation??? Who's she???
Lies. You care so much about what other people *sides* think about you
Maybe Logan listens to this song to remind himself to not care too much
But it doesn't work and it's getting to him more and more
Oh
That took a turn
Breathin'-Thomas Sanders
Good move
Don't really have much to say on this
The Bidding
Spoopy
Alchoholic!Logan
New idea for us fan writers
The pronunciation of beurgoise
Okay I'm like pretty certain at this point that all of the songs that mention a someone else is about Character!Thomas
A Better Version
OHMYGOD I LOVE THIS MUSICAL ITS SO UNDERRATED I HAVE LISTENED TO THE SOUNDTRACK AND UNGODLY AMOUNT OF TIMES YESSSSS
But also since I know the song in terrified cause the feels are gonna come in I just know it
Wait so is Jayce supposed to be Thomas???
I am suddenly feeling much more uncertain about my certainty
Okay let me unpause and just listen to it (even though I already know all of the lyrics)
Okay so I'm a dumbass and apparently this song isn't even part of the playlist
Okay so I'm an idiot and the last few songs have all been "related to playlist" and not in the actual playlist I'm big dumb.
Anyway here's my list of songs I think would fit. (BTW, I only went off of lyrics for these ones. I realize that there’s a general sound and vibe for the playlist, but I decided not to follow it.)
Oh No! ~ MARINA
Hug All Ur Friends ~ Cavetown
Bohemian Groove ~ Will Connolly
Guiltless ~ Dodie Clark
Lifeboat ~ Laurens O’Keefe
The Bidding ~ *idk who*
I Am Not A Robot ~ MARINA
Inútil - Lin Manuel Miranda
Through The Eyes Of A Child ~ AURORA
Community Gardens ~ The Scary Jokes
Let me know if I should do this with the other playlists as well! :)
#sander sides#ts sanders sides#sanders sides#thomas sanders#tss#logan sander angst#logan sanders#ts logan#logan’s playlist#first reaction#self harm mention#tw self harm
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Tagged by @slxsh-n-bxsh Thanks, pal!
Tagging: I’m, uh, gonna skip this part since I still don’t have many followers yet lol
FULL NAME: Cal Shepard
NICKNAME: the only nickname he really cares about is the private one Ryan used to call him (it’s nothing like, weird lol but Cal always enjoyed the idea of Ryan calling him a name reserved only for his ears)
GENDER: cis male
HEIGHT: 5′10″
AGE: depends what fic we’re talking about. with my new one that I’m eventually writing, around 35
ZODIAC: aries
SPOKEN LANGUAGES: spanish, english, chinese, italian, some korean, trade language
HAIR COLOR: brown
EYE COLOR: green
SKIN TONE: a little darker than the picture
BODY TYPE: toned, always been on the thinner side
VOICE: dunno, not his voice in-game
DOMINANT HAND: left handed
POSTURE: okay?
SCARS: self-harm scars on his thighs and larger ones on his arms from when he tried to kill himself, one from his forehead to cheekbone--he almost lost his right eye in that one, his side from when he got stabbed as a teenager, a bunch of others as a result of the life he’s led
TATTOOS: so many that I’m not quite sure what all of them are lmao. the Tenth Street Reds’ dagger symbol, blackout sleeve, octopus on his back, solar system planets on his side (Ryan got the same with him), the coordinates of Rosarito, Mexico on his hip (again, Ryan has the same coordinates. Cal has a map outline with his while Ryan has a compass), on his chest an abstract version of a song Ryan wrote for him, the word ‘beauty’ on his neck. later on: Grunt’s face on the back of his thigh after he lost a drunken competition to Jack, Kaidan’s name and the tree Kaidan painted on his arm
BIRTHMARKS: none
MOST NOTICEABLE FEATURE(S): tattoos
PLACE OF BIRTH: as far as he knows it’s Mexicali, Mexico
HOMETOWN: Mexicali
SIBLINGS: none
PARENTS: hell if he knows but I do
OCCUPATION: first a thief in the Reds, then an Alliance soldier (which he fucking despised), then after the Reaper War he starts a career in porn
CURRENT RESIDENCE: he and Kaidan live on the Citadel
CLOSE FRIENDS: Ryan, Wrex, Miranda, Ronan and Amanda (twins, Ryan’s other closest friends)
RELATIONSHIP STATUS: exclusive with Kaidan
FINANCIAL STATUS: between his work and the life insurance Ryan left him, he ended up quite well off
DRIVER’S LICENSE: lol no, Kaidan’s very nervous every time he has to get in a car with him. or the mako. especially the mako. actually Cal’s now banned from driving the mako
CRIMINAL RECORD: he only got caught for minor stuff!
VICES: used to be drugs and drinking (does his sluttiness count??)
SEXUAL ORIENTATION: gay
PREFERRED EMOTIONAL ROLE: submissive | dominant | switch (I’m not sure what this one means tbh)
PREFERRED SEXUAL ROLE: submissive | dominant | switch
LIBIDO: just...absurdly high
TURN ONS: name calling, biotics, spanking, roughness, group sex, being bound
TURN OFFS: piss, blood, sounding
LOVE LANGUAGE: uhhhhh. he likes giving little gifts, cooking meals. if he writes a song for someone then they’re very important to him. he also needs physical touch like hand holding, playing with his hair, hugging, Ryan used to always throw his arm over his shoulders when they’d walk
RELATIONSHIP TENDENCIES: the stuff above? Cal’s a slut but he’s still pretty new to the whole ‘serious relationship’ thing
CHARACTER’S THEME SONG: Manic Depression by Emilie Autumn
HOBBIES TO PASS TIME: playing music/writing songs, drawing, building model ships, skateboarding before he got too busy
PHOBIAS: claustrophobia and (after Ryan died) autophobia (fear of spending time alone)
SELF CONFIDENCE LEVEL: this fluctuates wildly for him. sometimes he hates himself and questions every choice he’s ever made, other times his self-confidence is incredibly high and he thinks he’s the best person in the galaxy
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Hey! So for some reason as I sat on my bathroom floor cleaning out the stuff under the sink I got this idea to make small playlists for people instead of a follow thing or in Kahoots with it? and want to fill their new year with maybe some new music or whatever and yeah. So these are all playlists for you guys that reminded me of you or songs I just think you’d like💕 (this is also why I’ve been so annoying the last couple of days asking about what streaming services you use)(also I love stupid jokes so be prepared)
Now please enjoy my suffering:
@sweetertayfiction : Asif, HEY LISTEN HERE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I FEEL LIKE IVE KNOWN YOU FOR YEARS YOU WERE PROBABLY MY FIRST FRIEND ON HERE YOURE AN ANGEL HAVE A GREAT YEAR
@bisexualgorgeous : Hannah, I don’t know where to start, not gonna lie I was so intimidated by you and your talent but since we’ve become friends I’ve come to realize that you’re such an amazing genuine person with a scary amount of talent who I am overjoyed to be friends with. (Also fun fact the first edit that “made it big” for me was one that you reblogged and complimented and that still means the world to me. And thank you for taking a chance on me with daily Taylor edits)
@spendsmychange : Ellie, We’re both each other’s biggest fans. I love you so much. Your personality and talent is top notch. I’d burn at the stake for you and I hope you know how much you mean to me.
@getaway-car : Han, Throwback to when I had a stroke when you followed me cause I had looked up to you for so long and couldn’t believe you followed me. You’ve made me feel so appreciated. You’re so amazing in every way. Also, YOUR EDITS ARE SO FUCKING GOOD AHHHHHHHHHH I LOVE THEM AND YOU NUMBER ONE HAN STAN FOR LIFE
@battledemo : Han, I don’t even know what to say. You mean so much to me. And being able to rant or talk about music with someone who gets it I don’t think I’d be able to give enough thanks. You’re probably my best friend, Han. I love you and would do anything for you 💕
@ciwyw2 : Maggie, HEY REMEMBER WHEN WE MET AND NOTHJNG IN THE WORLD CAN TOP THAT. But for reals you’re unreal, you helped me with my concert anxiety, you’re so funny and nice, out conversations are the best (also I see you reblogging my old crappy edits) rep tour kc will always be my favorite concert cause of you
@taylorsnewdress : Tori, HEY DID YOU KNOW YOURE GORGEOUS AND I ABSOLUTELY ADORE YOU???? CAUSE I JUST WANNA SCREAM IT ALL DAY EVERDAY AT YOU
@diamondseaside : Tina, my New Years resolution is to make you believe I am Taylor Swift also hey did you know that I absolutely adore you in every way?
@ikywts : Raquel, Hello angel. Wow. Idk what to say. I just love you and you make my heart feel safe
@tshifty : Kristin, you are so fucking smart. Sorry, I just felt like I needed to say that. Because you are and the way you handle things is a plus. You’re also talented, funny, and just overall a great person. I’m so glad I’ve come to know you better.
@partayswiftie : Ash, I’m still bitter you walked past me multiple times at kc. (But that doesn’t mean that I don’t love you and that I don’t think you’re one of the most amazing things to ever exist cause I do. ALSO J TOLD YOU YOUD MEET TAYLOR BEECH)
@friendlyneighborhoodpegacorn : Emma, my biggest life regret is not meeting you at KC. I can only attest if to the fact that you don’t exist cause you’re peak humanity with talent beauty and humor and also Play With My Cats is on a whole other level of humanity so that’s all the evidence I need.
@lfthiswasamovie : Em, Have I screamed that I love you at you enough? Cause I do and being your secret Santa was just the best and no matter what I’m hear for you angel.
@fearlessthealbum : Emily, I still need to get you Fearless mercy sorry I forgot bb. Also, how is one person as hysterical as you?
@itsdarkandalltoquiet : Ruby, you are a very non annoying child and ily
@colorsinautumnsobright : Autumn, you’re so kind and intelligent and always trying to light up others lives I love you so much.
@teardropsonmyguitar : AMANDA, I feel like you need your own post tbh you have been so amazing and getting to know you has been a gift. FIRST BURN SLAPS SO THANKS FOR THAT. I’m really not sure what to say, but I love you have a great new year.
@lovemademecrazys : Vicki, The only thing prettier than your edits is you and your soul. You’re so amazing.
@bleachellataylor : April, I have more Bleachella memes happy new year
@millionlittleshiningstars12 : Adrian, you’re so amazing and I’m so glad we’ve grown closer
@imhereonthekitchenfloor : Catherine, PRETZEL QUEEN, I looked for pretzel songs and couldn’t find any I’m sorry (I didn’t try that hard cause I’m tired but I tried) I’m here for you forever I love you you pretzel angel
@1989deluxe : Nikita, I love you more than you love sad beautiful tragic
@nowcanwebabes : Katie, you’re an actual goddess I love you
@bunchsrebecca : Miranda, LISTEN BEECH YOU ARE SO FUNNY CREATIVE AND TALENTED AND IM SO GALD WE MET AND GET TO CONTINUE BEING BERDS TOGETHER ABOUT THINGS LIKE CRAZY EX GIRLFRIEND AND MUSICALS I LOVE YOU BYE
@beginagain : Julia, okay this isn’t a note for Julia this is a note for y’all GO READ JULIAS BOOK ON WATTPAD ITS SO GOOD IM ACTUALLY IN LOVE SHES SO TALENTED AHHHHHHH
@thslove : Kathryn, A Place in This World is a good song you’re just mean
@heartsremainbreakable : Sarah, you have taught me so much I’m so grateful for people like you in the world. I love you enjoy the new year.
@ialmostdos : Sarah, I love getting to see your amazing face everyday through Snapchat and your personality is one of the best.
@swiftie-in-red : Rainey, You’re so nice and we have so many common interests I’m so glad to have met you and can’t wait to talk more about Percy Jackson
@fearlessplatiumedition : Rachel, I 👏 LOVE 👏 YOU 👏 SO MUCH YOURE AMAzing
@eyesoqen : Karli, (yours will come later) you’re such a blessing to this Earth and I’m glad I get to exist at the same time as you
@ours-ssong : Elisabeth, (yours will come later) don’t tell Ruby but your my favorite child. I love you so much and seeing you grow throughout the year in so many things has been amazing. Also y’all did you know she decorates cakes! It’s so cool! She’s really good.
@thatonedollar : Siya, (yours will come later) Talk about heaven on earth, you’re such a caring angel and you have been there for me through some of my worst moments this year I love you so much.
Okay, so happy New Year! Y’all have made this one to remember if I forgot anyone I am so sorry, I lost a few brain cells doing this but just know that I love you to infinity plus one(also for people who got joke ones -its pretty easy to tell- I’m making you an actual one lol) and for anyone who would just like a random playlist these are some of my faves.
Please ignore typos I haven’t slept since Thursday (if that) love y’all.
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THE HIGHWOMEN - REDESIGNING WOMEN
[5.30]
And yet they couldn't get Delta Burke to do a cameo in the video...
Joshua Lu: The Highwomen should, in theory, be a triumph for country music, at the very least because of the four amazing artists involved: Natalie Hemby (songwriter who's penned works for artists like Miranda Lambert, Kacey Musgraves and... Nelly Furtado?), Amanda Shires (singer/songwriter/violinist with six solo albums to her name), Brandi Carlile (responsible for one of the best albums of 2018 and for several other excellent ones) and Maren Morris (renowned hitmaker who recently sent "Girl" to #1 on the country airplay charts). Why, then, does "Redesigning Women" fail to muster the magic any one of the artists could deliver on her own? Vocally, the four of them blend together into each far too much; only Brandi's vocals ring distinctly, leaving the other three acting as part of her backdrop, including Maren, whose particularly potent pipes I shouldn't struggle to pinpoint. Lyrically, it's filled with signifiers for traditional vs. modern female roles, with requisite mentions of babies, the kitchen and hair dye, which make for evocative imagery but don't make for any meaningful message other than... that women's roles have evolved over time? It's too comfortable just describing the current state of affairs instead of demanding something more, and I'm left wondering what a listener is supposed to take away when the last guitar chord fades away. [4]
Michael Hong: The supergroup should involve a group of artists who know their strengths and weaknesses well enough that they're able to cover each other's weaknesses and emphasize their strengths in a way that wouldn't be possible as solo artists. The Pistol Annies worked so well on Interstate Gospel, not only because of the trio's harmonies, but also in the way that each artist brought something as a writer, like Monroe injecting some of her trademark dry humour into Lambert and Presley's wickedly smart small-town life observations. It comes as a confusing surprise then that across The Highwomen, less than half of all tracks are writing collaborations between the women, with Natalie Hemby being the sole member credited with writing their first outing. While Hemby has established herself as a great songwriter in Nashville, her strength was in the charming intimacy of her hushed vocals and finger-plucked guitar, but her own writing was hindered by her reliance on traditionalism that occasionally veered into cheesy nostalgia. "Redesigning Women" lacks the personal charm of Hemby's solo music and allows Hemby's penchant for cheesy traditionalism to seep through on awkward lines like "running the world while we're cleaning up the kitchen" and "changing our minds like we change our hair color." Confusingly, the track pushes this narrative where women have control, so long as they continue to provide in the more "traditional" gender roles. It makes for the track appearing to be a female empowerment anthem on first glance, but ending up being more outdated and restrictive, akin to Maren Morris's GIRL. Without the voices of Carlile, Morris, and Shires as writers, The Highwomen fall flat as a supergroup. While the four do sound pleasant across the track, pleasant just doesn't feel like enough on a track titled "Redesigning Women," which ultimately falls flat as another version of female empowerment written by the current Nashville songwriter du jour. [4]
Alex Clifton: In general feminist Americana/folk/country plays well with me, but where "Redesigning Women" gets really good is when all four women sing the title line. I hear so many older country superstars in their harmonies -- I could swear Dolly is in there singing along with them -- and it's a revelation. The lyrics are pretty good too, giving a light touch with lines like "breaking the jello mould" while still delivering a sincere message. The thing I have always liked about classic country is its strength, the confidence of the sliding guitars and banjos, how the singers sing out and loud, how even when there are quieter moments you still remain on solid ground. "Redesigning Women" does that while returning to an older sound that feels so rare these days, all the while making it fresh and glorious to hear. [8]
Alfred Soto: Shtickier and less distinctive than expected, "Redesigning Women" hews to a pattern -- a Jell-O mold? -- that acknowledges no middle ground between saints and surgeons; someone else, after all, a man, makes a woman a saint. It survives because Brandi Carlile, Maren Morris and Amanda Shires harmonize with the ease of women who understand how doing a job well is too often not reward enough. [6]
Jackie Powell: This song is an anthem and after my first listen, I didn't think I'd ever come to that conclusion. Country music for me is polarizing. But, each member of this quartet is Grammy-nominated in their own right and is enduring massive individual success. So why now for The Highwomen? "Redesigning Women" and the entire project coming from these four is selfless in nature. On CBS Morning before their debut at the Newport Folk Festival, Carlile referred to it as "a movement" rather than "a band." And the lyrical choices on this track are mostly consistent with that analysis. A goal is to inspire and that's admirable. Although I'll be frank, the first verse annoyed me; it reminded me of Girl Scout campfire songs. The chorus, however, is where The Highwomen shine. Each voice is heard, unlike the verses, and layered to provide a vocal texture that juxtaposes the nasal one you hear at the top of the song. I'm a sucker for alliteration and Hemby's serves as the best phrases in the entire song. But I don't love some of the female stereotypes referenced. Can we please move away from this idea that women almost always "need to look good," "clean the kitchen" or feel pressured to "feed the baby"? The Highwomen redeem themselves on the bridge which offers a call and response to a question that all who identify as female can relate to. Womanhood isn't black and white. There isn't a formula and if there is, then maybe you are doing it all wrong. The Highwomen have a broader audience than they think. I hope they take advantage of it as they continue to tell the stories of those who have redesigned and redefined their own womanhood. [6]
Joshua Copperman: The Highwomen have an interesting idea here -- "Running the world while we're cleaning up the kitchen" is clunky but appears to speculate that while gender roles are changing for women, men aren't meeting that change halfway. So you have podcasts asking if Women Can Have It All, and entire empires built on the Plight of the Working Woman -- in this song, the progress society has made (lol) indicates that "traditional women" take on all the responsibilities and nothing has gotten easier, let alone more equal. It's a thought-provoking message, but the rest is delivered in a surprisingly corny fashion from four women that, as far as I know, have either evaded or embraced corniness. This project could be a midpoint between Case/Lang/Veirs and Bridgers/Baker/Dacus, but the monotonous verses only bring to mind "Children of The Future" in their presentation and messaging. Maybe it's because up to this point, I've presented and lived in the world as a cis straight male (regardless of my actual orientation or gender identity). But no matter how I present myself, I know for a fact that all parties involved have done better, and this is deeply underwhelming. [4]
Iris Xie: A title like "Redesigning Women" begs something a lot more radical, maybe even jumping on the whole cyberpunk/anthropocene/post-apocalyptic aesthetic. But no, we get a song that is emblematic of conservative, tired, "choice" feminism. Why is buying 11 pairs of shoes considered moving progress forward? Why is a song about the fatigue in women's gender roles lacking so much anger? Why does this sonically sound like a swallowed deference? "Redesigning Women" upsets me, because it's like the time when I was a kid and asked older women if they've ever heard what feminism and seeing them wrinkle their noses at it and be offended at my question, and when I asked DC immigration lobbyists if they've ever experienced sexism or discrimination in their work and they stared at me because they didn't know how to answer the question. It made me feel so confused in those moments, and realizing how effective obfuscation is in separating and talking about the ways oppressive systems function, and how we ourselves can be extremely complicit in perpetuating them while also surviving them. "Redesigning Women" is meant as a touch-and-go balm as an acknowledgment of life's hardships, but without providing any solutions other than "let's make the best of it, you aren't the only one suffering," which is the only time that collectivism seems to raise its head in this individualist capitalist society, for the moment you start complaining, you aren't doing your part in your Dream. Bioessentialism and gender roles aside, this is a song that puts forth several arguments that The Highwomen and any other women just living their lives is redefining the roles of women. The imagery in "Making bank, shaking hands, driving 80 / Tryna get home just to feed the baby" is wonderfully succinct, and pretty much wraps up why life underneath capitalism absolutely sucks, whether you are or are not able to access that life. The rest of the examples -- such as "breaking every jello mold" and "When we love someone we take 'em to Heaven / And if the shoe fits, we're gonna buy 11" -- mix relatable, down-home metaphors with ones that wouldn't be out of place when it comes to simple desires to be a little too much, to be a little more ostentatious and a little less modest and "for the family!", where your every move as a woman is judged harshly. The bridge itself hearkens to a place of moral simplicity, with "How do we do it? How do we do it? / Making it up as we go along / How do we do it? How do we do it? / Half way right and half way wrong," that seems so innocent and very "we can do it!" But in reality, who is the target audience for this? It's for the women with families and jobs, and for those single femmes (like me!) who are conscientious of those future realities, who are all trying to keep these impossible lives and demands afloat in this disaster called late crisis capitalism. This is supposed to be soothing and reminds me that we're "all in this together," but it honestly kind of hurts to listen to this song. [5]
Katherine St Asaph: Designing Women is a relic of the '80s-'90s deadzone, and though it's getting rebooted and reconstituted, and was just rerun on Hulu (if you even knew), it is no longer a cultural touchstone, let alone enough of one to effectively snowclone. Jell-O molds reside in questionable '70s cookbooks and not modern kitchens, even in the South. Rosie the Riveter predates even the '50s. Nothing about this, from fusty lyrics to fustier vocals to women-are-fickle-but-good-fickle feminism, suggests it was written in the 21st century, let alone by "Country's Ballsiest New Supergroup." Who is this for? The kids are listening to Kacey Musgraves and Lil Nas X. The grownups are listening to country artists -- including some of the solo Highwomen, probably -- whose songs sound like they're inhabited by real people, not the speechwriters for corporate retreats. Industry folks are undoubtedly listening to this out of pent-up goodwill, which would be better directed toward commissioning repertoire that doesn't sound like it'd be dated in 1989. Extra point because at least it's responsible for the best thing Dierks Bentley has ever recorded. [2]
Stephen Eisermann: The idiot members of the Deplorable Choir have been all over my Twitter feed this week, so much so that I almost doubted if I ever wanted to listen to women of country collaborate for a track. I'm so pissed this song didn't show up immediately after I first saw that horrendous performance because this track, with its rich harmonies and empowering lyrics, elevates country music in a way that melts the iciness that has developed around my heart in recent years. These are the women that are leading and should continue to lead us into the future. [8]
Thomas Inskeep: Better in theory than in practice, mainly because the song's lyrics are just the slightest bit kitschy. But goddamn if Brandi Carlile, Natalie Hemby, Maren Morris, and Amanda Shires don't sound great together, and are given perfect country production by Dave Cobb. Even though I wish I liked "Redesigning Women" a little more, it still whets my appetite for their debut album, because I know there's even better to come. [6]
[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]
#Brandi Carlile#Natalie Hemby#Maren Morris#Amanda Shires#The Highwomen#country#music#music review#writing
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Anti-Love Collection Track List
Below the cut is a list of every track on every disc of the Anti-Love Album. I thought pretty seriously about going through and linking to music videos and bandcamp and whatnot, but, yeah, that’s not happening tonight.
Disc One(Chaotic/Static Cling Enterprises)
1. Could You Use Me? Harry Groener and Jodi Benson 2. Hit the Road, Jack Ray Charles and the Raelettes 3. Down with Love Caxton Swing 4. You're No Good Linda Ronstadt 5. It Ain't Me, Babe The Turtles 6. Already Gone The Eagles 7. Paradise By the Dashboard Light Meatloaf 8. Don't Believe a Word Andy Taylor 9. I Will Survive Gloria Gaynor 10. I've Done Everything for You Rick Springfield 11. Love Stinks The J. Geils Band 12. Don't You Want Me The Human League 13. Goodbye to You Scandal 14. Love's Been a Little Bit Hard on Me Juice Newton 15. I Could Be Happy Altered Images 16. What Do All the People Know The Monroes 17. Jukebox (Don't Put Another Dime) The Flirts 18. No More Words Berlin 19. She Don't Love Nobody Nick Lowe 20. So In Love Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark 21. Let Your Love Go Bread
Disc Two(Chaotic/Static Cling Enterprises) 1. Would I Lie to You Eurythmics 2. Keep Your Hands to Yourself The Georgia Satellites 3. Twisting They Might Be Giants 4. I Don't Want Your Love Duran Duran 5. One More Minute Weird Al Yankovic 6. What Part of No Cactus Country 7. Itty Bitty Little Single Solitary Piece O' My Heart Lari White 8. That Was Yesterday Wynonna Judd 9. Jane Barenaked Ladies 10. Better Things to Do Terri Clark 11. Bury the Shovel Clay Walker 12. No News Lonestar 13. Spiderwebs No Doubt 14. She Won't Change Her Mind The Band with Rocks In 15. Me Neither Brad Paisley 16. Waste Smash Mouth 17. Goodbye Earl Dixie Chicks 18. Giving up on Love Ataris 19. Kiss This Aaron Tippin 20. Last Chance to Lose Your Keys Brand New 21. It's Only Me (The Wizard of Magicland) Barenaked Ladies
Disc Three(Aberration, Inc.) 1. Can't Hold Us Down Christina Aguilera feat. Lil Kim 2. The Frug Rilo Kiley 3. A Man/Me/Then Jim Rilo Kiley 4. Nothing Came Out The Mouldy Peaches 5. All That She Wants Ace of Base 6. You Oughta Know Alanis Morissette 7. The More You Ruv Someone Avenue Q 8. Roses Outkast 9. Day Tripper Live 10. Sexx Laws Beck 11. Vienna Billy Joel 12. Sunday Girl Blondie 13. You Don't Own Me The Blow Monkeys 14. You Give Love a Bad Name Bon Jovi 15. Protons, Neutrons, Electrons Cat Empire 16. Girls Just Wanna Have Fun Cyndi Lauper 17. Mix Tape Avenue Q 18. 31st & M The Daycare Stranglers 19. Fuck It (I Don't Want You Back) Eamon 20. Inside Out Eve 6 21. Beep The Pussycat Dolls feat. will.i.am
Disc Four(Aberration, Inc.) 1. Just One of Those Things Frank Sinatra 2. Just Friends Gavin Degraw 3. Defying Gravity Idina Menzel and Kristin Chenoweth 4. Sugar Tick Tick Boom Cast 5. Gold Digger Kanye West feat. Jamie Foxx 6. Bag of Money The Low Life 7. Scotty Doesn't Know Lustra 8. I'm So Alone The Mad Caddies 9. World at Large Modest Mouse 10. Get Over It OK Go 11. People Got to Be Free The Rascals 12. Tainted Love Soft Cell 13. Don't Do Me Like That Tom Petty 14. What's Love Got to Do with It Tina Turner 15. He Wasn't Man Enough Toni Braxton 16. Undone (The Sweater Song) Weezer 17. Funny Honey Renee Zellweger 18. I'll Never Be Jealous Again Reta Shaw and Eddie Foy, Jr. 19. Everyone Else Has Had More Sex Than Me Ambient Irony 20. Dirty Little Secret All American Rejects
Disc Five(Chaotic/Static Cling Enterprises) 1. Will you Love Me Tomorrow The Shirelles 2. Desperate But Not Serious Adam Ant 3. Ready to Run Dixie Chicks 4. I'm Gonna Miss Her Brad Paisley 5. Love Is Hell Ryan Adams 6. It Ain't None of Your Business Missing Persons 7. Stupid Boy Keith Urban 8. Before He Cheats Carrie Underwood 9. You Don't Love Me Anymore Weird Al Yankovic 10. The Song That Goes Like This Christopher Sieber and Sara Ramirez 11. (I'm Gonna) Run Away Joan Jett and the Blackhearts 12. I'm Not in Love Talking Heads 13. You Keep Me Hangin' On Kim Wilde 14. Don't Let's Start Common Rotation 15. That's Enough of That Mila Mason 16. Leave in Silence Depeche Mode 17. Sign of the Times The Belle Stars 18. Break Your Heart Barenaked Ladies 19. Signs of Life Journey 20. Cell Block Tango The Six Merry Murderesses of Cook County Jail
Disc Six(Aberration, Inc.) 1. Designated Drinker Alan Jackson and George Strait 2. Video Game Heart All Girl Summer Fun Band 3. Twisting They Might Be Giants 4. Fighter Christina Aguilera 5. Found Out About You Gin Blossom 6. What Is This Feeling Kristin Chenoweth and Idina Menzel 7. Therapy Amy Spranger and Raul Esparza 8. Since U Been Gone Kelly Clarkson 9. Number One John Legend feat. Kanye West 10. Material Girl Madonna 11. Build Me Up, Buttercup The Goops 12. Schadenfreude Natalie Venetia Belcon and Rick Lyon 13. Happy Now Gwen Stefani 14. Why Don't You Get a Job Offspring 15. Cry Me a River Justin Timberlake 16. Ugly Ugly Mustache Girl The Skakabobs 17. You Don't Know How It Feels Tom Petty 18. Pink Triangle Weezer 19. Let Me Be Lonely Will Hoge 20. Buttons The Pussycat Dolls 21. My Love (The Christian Bale Experience) Sweet Tired Kitten
Disc Seven(Chaotic/Static Cling Enterprises) 1. Let's Hear It For Love Smoking Popes 2. She Hates Me Puddle of Mudd 3. In and Out of My Life (In a Day) The Pandoras 4. Cry of the Wild Goose Frankie Laine 5. Way Away Yellowcard 6. Blue Monday New Order 7. Kerosene Miranda Lambert 8. Don't Shed a Tear Paul Carrack 9. Ghost of Love The Proclaimers 10. I Write Sins Not Tragedies Panic at the Disco 11. Smile Lily Allen 12. Goodbye Says It All BlackHawk 13. Careless Memories Duran Duran 14. Nowhere Girl B-Movie 15. Hard to Be a Husband, Hard to Be a Wife Chely Wright and Brad Paisley 16. Not About Love Fiona Apple 17. Take Out the Trash They Might Be Giants 18. U + Ur Hand Pink 19. Good News Neurotic Outsiders 20. Love You Jack Ingram 21. Time for Me to Fly REO Speedwagon 22. What Is This Thing Called Love? John Barrowman
Disc Eight(Aberration, Inc.) 1. Stripped, Part 2 Christina Aguilera 2. Girls Lie, Too Terri Clark 3. What Goes Around Comes Around Justin Timberlake 4. Believe Cher 5. Subtract One Love (Multiply the Heartaches) Cake 6. Knock 'Em Out Lily Allen 7. All That She Wants Ace of Base 8. You Don't Love Me The Kooks 9. You're So Damn Hot OK Go 10. Billie Jean Michael Jackson 11. Losin' You Amy Millan 12. Oh, Goddamnit Hot Hot Heat 13. You Oughta Know Alanis Morissette 14. You Don't Own Me The Blow Monkeys 15. Girls Beastie Boys 16. Next Ex-Girlfriend Bowling for Soup 17. Never There Cake 18. You Are Everything The Low Life
Disc Nine(Chaotic/Static Cling Enterprises) 1. Love Potion No. 9 The Searchers 2. My Lovin' (You're Never Gonna Get It) En Vogue 3. Liberty Duran Duran 4. Da Da Da I Don't Love You You Don't Love Me Aha Aha Aha Trio 5. Hole in My Head Dixie Chicks 6. Your Woman White Town 7. Murderess Power Station 8. Good as Gone Little Big Town 9. One Night in Bangkok Murray Head 10. Endicott Kid Creole & the Coconuts 11. Kiss You Off Scissor Sisters 12. I'll Take You Back Brad Paisley 13. New Toy Lene Lovich 14. Every Word Means No Let's Active 15. Broke in Two They Might Be Giants 16. My Friends Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter 17. He Can't Quit Her Gary Allan 18. When You're in Love The Proclaimers 19. Don't Think You'll Be Missed Aileen Stanley with the Virginians 20. Why Say Anything Nice? Barenaked Ladies
Disc Ten(Aberration, Inc.) 1. Don't Trust Me 3OH!3 2. Atari Lucky Boys Confusion 3. Get Over It OK Go 4. So What Pink 5. Have I Been a Fool Jack Penate 6. Flavor of the Weak American Hi-Fi 7. There's a Fine, Fine Line Stephanie D'Abrazzo 8. 99 Problems Jay-Z 9. Don't Want You Back Backstreet Boys 10. You Turn the Screws Cake 11. Breakin' Up Rilo Kiley 12. More Boys I Meet Carrie Underwood 13. They'll Need a Crane They Might Be Giants 14. Should've Said No Taylor Swift 15. Hound Dog Elvis Presley 16. Take Me or Leave Me Rent 17. Your Kisses are Wasted on Me The Pipettes 18. Just a Girl No Doubt 19. Bust Your Windows Jazmine Sullivan 20. Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It) Beyonce Knowles 21. There You Go Pink
Disc Eleven(Chaotic/Static Cling Enterprises) 1. I Hate Myself for Loving You Joan Jett 2. Her Royal Majesty James Darren 3. What If I'm Right? Sandi Thom 4. I Hear You Knockin' Fats Domino 5. Go Your Own Way Fleetwood Mac 6. He'll Have to Stay Jeanne Black 7. Du Hast Rammstein 8. Ampersand Amanda Palmer 9. Another Girl The Beatles 10. Can't Do It Today Gary Allan 11. No Scrubs TLC 12. Cold Cold Heart Tony Bennett 13. Gunpowder and Lead Miranda Lambert 14. True Romance She Wants Revenge 15. Brand New Lover Dead or Alive 16. Ex-Girlfriend No Doubt 17. Nothing Suits Me Like a Suit Neil Patrick Harris, et al 18. Don't Say You Love Me Erasure 19. Red Rubber Ball Cyrkle 20. Strange Reba McEntire 21. Mr. Spock Nerf Herder 22. See You Later Alligator Bill Haley and His Comets
Disc Twelve(Aberration, Inc.) 1. Right as Rain Adele 2. She Ain't Got LeToya Luckett 3. Fly on the Wall Miley Cyrus 4. Telephone Lady Gaga feat. Beyoncé 5. Love Drunk Boys Like Girls 6. Bye Bye JoDee Messina 7. Analysis of a 1970s Divorce David Dondero 8. I'm Not Crying Flight of the Conchords 9. Every Breath You Take Police 10. You Owe Me an IOU Hot Hot Heat 11. It's Over John Legend feat. Kanye West 12. Mood Ring Relient K 13. Picture to Burn Taylor Swift 14. Gives You Hell All American Rejects 15. Hit Em Up Style Blu Cantrell 16. Beautiful Girls Sean Kingston 17. It's Oh So Quiet Bjork 18. Pastures Lil' Justice
Disc Thirteen(Chaotic/Static Cling Enterprises) 1. Fox on the Run Sweet 2. Angel in Your Arms Hot 3. Say It Right Nelly Furtado 4. Gimme Three Steps Lynyrd Skynyrd 5. Heartbreaker Pat Benatar 6. Don't Bet Money, Honey Linda Scott 7. Two Out of Three Ain't Bad Meatloaf 8. Too Many Fish in the Sea The Marvelettes 9. Pet Name They Might Be Giants 10. Cold as Ice Foreigner 11. Jezebel Frankie Laine 12. Dark Lady Cher 13. (She's So) Selfish The Knack 14. Evil Woman Electric Light Orchestra 15. Lipstick on Your Collar Connie Francis 16. Stereo John Legend 17. Too Fast James Marsters 18. I Don't Wanna Go on with You Like That Elton John 19. It's My Life Talk Talk 20. Cold Hearted Paula Abdul
Disc Fourteen: Suck It, Marshall(Chaotic/Static Cling Enterprises) 1. Told You So Barenaked Ladies 2. The Sign Ace of Base 3. Bulletproof La Roux 4. Victim of Love Erasure 5. I'll Never Fall in Love Again Kristin Chenoweth and Sean Hayes 6. Are You Fucking Kidding Me? Kate Miller-Heidke 7. Leeds United Amanda Palmer and the Born Again Horny Men of Edinburgh 8. Bringin' Me Down Andy Taylor 9. Alejandro Lady Gaga 10. Go Where You Wanna Go The Mamas and the Papas 11. Hate on Me Jill Scott 12. Shop Around Smokey Robinson and the Miracles 13. Anti-Love Song Raven-Symoné 14. Don't Come Around Here No More Tom Petty 15. King of Anything Sara Bareilles 16. Endgame Tommy Körberg and Barbara Dickson 17. I Am a Rock Simon and Garfunkel 18. Don't Ask Me OK Go 19. Gonna Get Along Without Ya Now Patience and Prudence 20. I Quit Hepburn 21. The Mixed Tape Jack's Mannequin
Disc Fourteen-and-a-Half: The Robot Falls in Love (Static Cling) 1. Rolling in the Deep Adele 2. Rolling in the Deep David Choi 3. Rolling in the Deep Jodie Aysha 4. Rolling in the Deep Kina Grannis 5. Rolling in the Deep David Cook 6. Rolling in the Deep Wonderland 7. Rolling in the Deep PS22 Chorus feat. Denise 8. Rolling in the Deep Adele, Jay-Z, Biggie Smalls, and Voodoo Farm 9. Rolling in the Deep Tahj Mowry 10. Rolling in the Deep Tim Halperin 11. Rolling in the Deep Melissa Tojones 12. Rolling in the Deep Mike Posner 13. Rolling in the Deep Chris Ning 14. Rolling in the Deep Haley Reinhart 15. Rolling in the Deep Darius Dante 16. Rolling in the Deep John Legend 17. Rolling in the Deep (live on Ellen) Adele
Disc Fifteen(Aberration, Inc.)
1. Just You Wait My Fair Lady 2. You Can Make Him Like You The Hold Steady 3. Like a Boy�� Ciara 4. Marionette The Marvelettes 5. Through with You Maroon 5 6. Bye Bye Baby Janis Joplin 7. Let It Die Foo Fighters 8. Blow It Out Ludacris 9. Take It Easy (Love Nothing) Bright Eyes 10. The Line Skakabobs 11. Fuck You Cee Lo Green 12. Grenade Bruno Mars 13. Jar of Hearts Christina Perri 14. Love the Way You Lie Eminem feat. Rihanna 15. Potential Break-Up song Aly & AJ 16. Cooler Than Me Mike Posner 17. What the Hell Avril Lavigne 18. Tired Adele 19. My Give a Damn's Busted JoDee Messina 20. Ignorance Paramore 21. Hot and Cold Katy Perry
Disc Sixteen(Chaotic/Static Cling Enterprises) 1. Almost Sorry Scissor Sisters 2. Drama! Erasure 3. Stop Draggin' My Heart Around Stevie Nicks and Tom Petty 4. Runaway Baby Bruno Mars 5. I Have Learned Barenaked Ladies 6. All Cried Out Redux Jill Scott (feat. Doug E. Fresh) 7. If Only Grey Delisle and Neil Patrick Harris 8. Nobody's Side Elaine Paige and Murray Head 9. Human Charlene Kaye 10. Maneater Hall & Oates 11. Mr. Big Stuff Jean Knight 12. Used to Love U John Legend 13. Bad Medicine Bon Jovi 14. Treat Me Right Pat Benatar 15. We'll Sing in the Sunshine Gale Garnett 16. The Last Song Tim Halperin 17. Bills, Bills, Bills Darren Criss and the Warblers 18. Modern Girl Sheena Easton 19. Chain of Fools Aretha Franklin 20. Dreams Be Dreams Jack Johnson
Disc Seventeen(Chaotic/Static Cling Enterprises) 1. Dead Memories Slipknot 2. Poison Alice Cooper 3. Paper Gangsta Lady Gaga 4. Maneater Nelly Furtado 5. These Boots Are Made for Walkin' Nancy Sinatra 6. 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover Paul Simon 7. Stutter Joe Walker 8. Solitaire Laura Branigan 9. Runaround Sue Dion and the Beltones 10. Life Goes On Little Texas 11. Me Party Amy Adams and Eric Jacobsen 12. Coin-Operated Boy The Dresden Dolls 13. Smoochy Smoochy Pukey Pukey Harry and the Potters 14. I Know There's Something Going On Frida 15. Evil Ways Santana 16. Your Cheating Heart Joni James 17. Harden My Heart Quarterflash 18. Rest in Peace James Marsters 19. That'll Be the Day Linda Ronstadt 20. (I'm Not Your) Stepping Stone The Monkees 21. Na Na Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye Steam
Disc Seventeen-Plus(Static Cling) 1. Ready to Go (excerpt) Nicholas Strauss and Brian Holden 2. Please Don't Touch Me Megan Mullally 3. I Want You, But I Don't Need You Momus 4. The Longest Text Message Childish Gambino 5. Makin' Whoopie Amanda Palmer 6. Fuck You/Gonna Get Over You Sara Bareilles 7. Getting Rid of Britta Eric Christian Olsen, Chevy Chase, and Tom Wolfe 8. Geek in the Pink Jason Mraz 9. Look It Up Ashton Shepherd 10. Poison Bel Biv DeVoe 11. Used to Love Her Guns N' Roses 12. Irreplaceable Beyoncé (feat. Ghostface Killah) 13. How to Write a Love Song Axis of Awesome 14. The Girl Next Door (To Everybody Else) George Watsky 15. I'm Tired Madeline Kahn 16. Jubilation Day Steve Martin and the Steep Canyon Rangers 17. Making Circles Christian Kane 18. Tyrone Erykah Badu 19. The Rake's Song The Decemberists 20. The Succubus Isaac Hayes and Trey Parker 21. There Ain't Nothing Like a Dick Nicholas Strauss and Devin Lytle
Disc Eighteen(Static Cling) 1. She Runs Tim Halperin 2. Boy Toy Tanya and the Hot Girls 3. Misery Maroon 5 4. Grown Man Cry Amanda Palmer and the Grand Theft Orchestra 5. Ooh La La Counting Crows 6. The Truth About Love P!nk 7. Bones Gary Allan 8. Good Girl Carrie Underwood 9. I Don't Think She's in Love Anymore Charlie Pride 10. I'm Not Your Toy La Roux 11. Kids Childish Gambino 12. Lesson in Leavin' Jo Dee Messina 13. Mockingbird Rob Thomas 14. Say You're Sorry Sara Bareilles 15. Can't Wait to Say No to You TalkFine 16. You Lie The Band Perry 17. I'll Feel a Whole Let Better The Byrds 18. Turn on the Radio Reba McEntire 19. Bye Bye Baby OK Go 20. Leave the Pieces The Wreckers
Disc Nineteen(Static Cling) 1. Rumour Has It Adele 2. Woman Up Charlene Kaye 3. No Surprise Daughtry 4. Nylons in a Rip Nikka Costa 5. How Am I Doin'? Dierks Bentley 6. Hermione The Moaning Myrtles 7. Baby Don't Get Hooked on Me Mac Davis 8. The Apartment Song Tom Petty 9. I'm Like a Bird Nelly Furtado 10. At Seventeen Janis Ian 11. Le Disko Shiny Toy Guns 12. Strippers Ghost of the Robot 13. You Don't Like Me They Might Be Giants 14. Shame on You Jerry Minor 15. The More I Learn (The Less I Understand About Love) Ronna Reeves 16. Bad Blood Natalie Lungley 17. To Be a Man Brian Holden and Joseph Walker 18. Her Daddy Was a Dalek, Her Mummy Was a Non-Stick Frying Pan Martin Gordon 19. Men The Forester Sisters 20. Rashida Jones Prometheus Brown and Bambu 21. All You Really Need Is Love Brad Paisley 22. Alone with You Jake Owen 23. Wind It Up Barenaked Ladies
Disc Twenty(Static Cling) 1. You Will See Me dan le sac Vs Scroobius Pip 2. Pumpkin Soup Kate Nash 3. Girls Ain't Nothing but Trouble The Fresh Prince and DJ Jazzy Jeff 4. Sigh No More Catherine Tate and David Tennant 5. Tough Goodbye Gary Allan 6. Survivor Destiny's Child 7. Trade Mistakes Panic at the Disco 8. I Don't Wanna Be in Love Good Charlotte 9. Poison Apple Charlene Kaye 10. Hey Robin, Jolly Robin Paterson Joseph 11. Sitting, Waiting, Wishing Jack Johnson 12. Blow Me (One Last Kiss) P!nk 13. Better off with Him A 14. Let Her Rip Dixie Chicks 15. Don't Think Twice It's All Right Bob Dylan 16. Shut Up Black Eyed Peas 17. I Hate Everything About You Three Day's Grace 18. Eden Sara Bareilles 19. Amsterdam Guster 20. Erase Me Ben Folds Five 21. Good Day The Dresden Dolls
Disc Twenty.Five: Keep Your Hands off Will You Damn Fancy Cannibal(Static Cling) 1. Goldberg Variations: Aria Glenn Gould 2. Sympathy for the Devil The Rolling Stones 3. Fee Fi Fo The Cranberries 4. Civilized Man James Marsters 5. A Place Called Home Kim Richey 6. Gravity The Dresden Dolls 7. For Reasons Unknown The Killers 8. A Formidable Marinade Mikelangelo and the Black Sea Gentlemen 9. Your Own Worst Enemy They Might Be Giants 10. Temptation VAST 11. Exterminate, Regenerate Chameleon Circuit 12. Thankless Job Anthony Stewart Head 13. Demons Guster 14. Let's Kill Tonight Panic at the Disco 15. Crime and Passion Duran Duran 16. Polly Nirvana 17. Hello, My Treacherous Friends OK Go 18. I Know Things Now Danielle Ferland 19. Monster Lady Gaga 20. One Tiny Thing 8in8 21. Stand By Me Mona 22. Vide Cor Meum Patrick Cassidy 23. Hannibal (Censored) oswinlost
Disc Twenty-One: The Oklahoma Legacy OR Musical Anachronism(Static Cling) 1. Girl in a Country Song Maddie & Tae 2. Mister Nice Guy Invisible Inc. 3. You Don't Know What Love Is (You Just Do As You're Told) The White Stripes 4. What You Call Love Guster 5. Because It's Not Love (But It's Still a Feeling) The Pipettes 6. Upside Down Barenaked Ladies 7. Lasso Sister Sparrow and the Dirty Birds 8. Bang Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down) Nico Vega 9. If Your Kisses Can't Hold the Man That You Love Rasputina 10. Epiphany Chrisette Michele 11. Wishing He Was Dead The Like 12. Stunner dan le sac Vs Scroobius Pip 13. Forgot to Laugh Bridgit Mendler 14. Delayed Devotion Duffy 15. Switch TLC 16. I Love It Icona Pop feat. Charli XCX 17. Leaving You Behind Amanda Blank 18. Love Don't Love You En Vogue 19. Drowning Banks 20. Building a Wall Brian d'Arcy James 21. Truce The Dresden Dolls
Disc Twenty-Two(Static Cling) 1. Dickhead Kate Nash 2. Love Is Like a Bottle of Gin The Magnetic Fields 3. Same Old Love Selena Gomez 4. Burn Phillipa Soo 5. Turn Me Loose Loverboy 6. So Long Guster 7. Free Fallin' Tom Petty 8. Love Sick Bob Dylan 9. Look for the Woman dan le sac and Scroobius Pip 10. Opposite of Blue Raining Jane 11. Leave Barenaked Ladies 12. L.A. Devotee Panic at the Disco 13. How to Be a Heartbreaker Marina and the Diamonds 14. The Sad Truth Shauna Carrick 15. Here Alessia Cara 16. Hungover Heart Gary Allan 17. Cupid's Got a Shotgun Carrie Underwood 18. Ex's & Oh's Elle King 19. If This Is It Huey Lewis and the News 20. You Rascal You Hanni El Khatib 21. Merry Happy Kate Nash
Disc Twenty-Three(Static Cling) 1. Casanova (Your Playing Days Are Over) Ruby Andrews 2. You Finally Said Something Good (When You Said Goodbye) Teddy Thompson 3. Allez-vous En Kate & Anna McGarrigle 4. By the Sea Helena Bonham Carter and Johnny Depp 5. One Night Stand The Pipettes 6. You Can't Go By That Ricochet 7. Goodies Ciara feat. Petey Pablo 8. Neutron Dance Pointer Sisters 9. Trouble Avicii 10. Smoke Rings in the Dark Gary Allan 11. So Gone John Legend 12. You're Easy on the Eyes Terri Clark 13. Better to Leave Jordan Brown 14. Second Chance Shinedown 15. Ballad of Mr. Steak Kishi Bashi 16. Hunter's Kiss Rasputina 17. The Jeep Song The Dresden Dolls 18. My First Stalker Watsky 19. Parasites San Fermin 20. End Love OK Go
Disc Twenty-Four(Static Cling) 1. Doin' It By Myself Guster 2. Me, Myself, and I G-Eazy feat. Bebe Rexha 3. Duct Tape Heart Barenaked Ladies 4. Instant Pleasure Rufus Wainwright 5. Please Don't Tell Her Jason Mraz 6. Mr. Know It All Kelly Clarkson 7. Set Me Free Leela James 8. Turning Tables Adele 9. Hard Hearted Hannah Bea Arthur 10. Here I Go Again Whitesnake 11. 455 Rocket Kathy Matea 12. She Had the World Panic! at the Disco 13. Heartbeat Childish Gambino 14. Your Love Is a Lie Simple Plan 15. Flake Jack Johnson 16. Little Rock Reba McEntire 17. Four Little Diamonds Electric Light Orchestra 18. What Makes You Cry The Proclaimers 19. The Fog Overcoats 20. Sorry Beyonce 21. Motherfucker Got Fucked Up Folk Uke
Disc Twenty-Five(Static Cling) 1. Welcome to Hell Saoirse Ronan, Cecliy Strong, Kate McKinnon, Aidy Bryant 2. A Kiss Is Not a Contract Flight of the Conchords 3. Leave Me Alone The Veronicas 4. Simple Machine Guster 5. I'm Moving On Chyvonne Scott 6. Daddy Lessons Beyonce 7. As the Crow Flies Gary Allan 8. Five Minutes dan le sac vs. Scroobius Pip 9. Love Will Tear Us Apart �� Joy Division 10. Now I Know Lari White 11. That's My Girl Fifth Harmony 12. Bling Bling Junglepussy 13. Bye Bye Bye *NSync 14. It Was a Shit Show Santino Fontana 15. Paper Mache (Single A.F.) Miss Eaves 16. Daria Cake 17. Sleeping Beauty Helen Trevillion 18. Justice for Lavender Shauna Carrick 19. Philosopher San Fermin 20. No Means No (But So Do Other Things, Too!) Grumpy Princess 21. Flirtin' El Pus 22. Pink Lemonade Watsky with Invisible Inc. 23. Stake a Claim dan le sac vs. Scroobius Pip
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Pikesville teacher creates cicada song to make the bug less scary to students People might be talking about the cicadas, but in Pikesville, some fourth graders are singing about them.”It’s a cicada,” is the title of the No. 1 hit song going around the Krieger Schechter Day School in Pikesville, where music teacher Sara Fuld dusted off a song she wrote 17 years ago for a whole new brood to sing.”I did a lot of tweaks to it, changed some wording around and brought it out about two weeks ago for the kids to sing,” Fuld said.ALSO: Blast from the Past: WBAL-TV visits cicada-infested tree 17 years laterFuld said she wrote the song to be funny and educational, putting in lyrics like, “They need to procreate-a. They lay their eggs and then they die. Sad to be a cicada.””If kids can laugh at something, it makes it does make it a lot less scary for them,” she said.”It’s very funny. I like the lines in it. Some of the lines can be super funny and some of the lines can just be regular,” said student Jonah Adler.ALSO: Health benefits of eating cicadas”I’m not a big cicada fan. So, I’m starting to like them more by hearing the lines, so I knew they didn’t sting or bite, but yeah, I learned a lot of things,” said student Isabella Hodes.It’s a fun way to end the school year for kids just now being allowed to sing again because of COVID-19. Like the cicadas, moments like this will be gone too soon.You can find the song by clicking here. PIKESVILLE, Md. — People might be talking about the cicadas, but in Pikesville, some fourth graders are singing about them. “It’s a cicada,” is the title of the No. 1 hit song going around the Krieger Schechter Day School in Pikesville, where music teacher Sara Fuld dusted off a song she wrote 17 years ago for a whole new brood to sing. “I did a lot of tweaks to it, changed some wording around and brought it out about two weeks ago for the kids to sing,” Fuld said. ALSO: Blast from the Past: WBAL-TV visits cicada-infested tree 17 years later Fuld said she wrote the song to be funny and educational, putting in lyrics like, “They need to procreate-a. They lay their eggs and then they die. Sad to be a cicada.” “If kids can laugh at something, it makes it does make it a lot less scary for them,” she said. “It’s very funny. I like the lines in it. Some of the lines can be super funny and some of the lines can just be regular,” said student Jonah Adler. ALSO: Health benefits of eating cicadas “I’m not a big cicada fan. So, I’m starting to like them more by hearing the lines, so I knew they didn’t sting or bite, but yeah, I learned a lot of things,” said student Isabella Hodes. It’s a fun way to end the school year for kids just now being allowed to sing again because of COVID-19. Like the cicadas, moments like this will be gone too soon. You can find the song by clicking here. 1 of 73 Cicadas seen May 11 just off Belfast Road in Sparks, Baltimore County. PHOTO: Candi Brosnan 2 of 73 Cicadas seen May 11 just off Belfast Road in Sparks, Baltimore County. PHOTO: Candi Brosnan 3 of 73 Cicadas seen May 11 just off Belfast Road in Sparks, Baltimore County. PHOTO: Candi Brosnan 4 of 73 Cicadas seen May 11 just off Belfast Road in Sparks, Baltimore County. PHOTO: Candi Brosnan 5 of 73 Cicadas seen May 11 just off Belfast Road in Sparks, Baltimore County. PHOTO: Candi Brosnan 6 of 73 Cicadas seen May 11 just off Belfast Road in Sparks, Baltimore County. PHOTO: Candi Brosnan 7 of 73 Cicadas seen May 11 just off Belfast Road in Sparks, Baltimore County. PHOTO: Candi Brosnan 8 of 73 On May 11, this color-coordinated fella joined me for coffee on my front porch in Hamilton Hills in northeast Baltimore! – Stacy Bryan PHOTO: Stacy Bryan 9 of 73 Two of hundreds that emerged in our front lawn in Homeland. We are already finding empty shells as they morph from nymphs to young adults. – John Grayson PHOTO: John Grayson 10 of 73 Cicadas coming up on Old Stockbridge Drive in Ellicott City. – Becky Koskovich PHOTO: Becky Koskovich 11 of 73 PHOTO: Becky Koskovich 12 of 73 PHOTO: Kaitlynn Grassi 13 of 73 PHOTO: Joseph Regier 14 of 73 PHOTO: Nancy Palmquist 15 of 73 PHOTO: Jeffery Dawson 16 of 73 PHOTO: Cheryl Keffer 17 of 73 PHOTO: Karen Vincent 18 of 73 PHOTO: Bonnie Ford 20 of 73 PHOTO: Larry Derreth 21 of 73 PHOTO: Chris Pluemer 22 of 73 PHOTO: Beth Scearce 23 of 73 PHOTO: Tarah Theoret 24 of 73 PHOTO: Sarah Siebold 25 of 73 PHOTO: Joyce Morris 27 of 73 PHOTO: Amanda Keyser 30 of 73 PHOTO: Nancy Miller 31 of 73 PHOTO: Doreen Anderson 32 of 73 PHOTO: Christina Gendeloff 33 of 73 PHOTO: Amanda Paoletti 34 of 73 PHOTO: Cory Zolnier 35 of 73 PHOTO: Danielle G. 36 of 73 PHOTO: Jack Cooper 37 of 73 PHOTO: Bibi Foston 38 of 73 PHOTO: Lisa Baer 40 of 73 PHOTO: Kathleen Flower 41 of 73 PHOTO: Dave Erdman 42 of 73 PHOTO: Sheila Keating 45 of 73 PHOTO: Doug McCarthy 46 of 73 PHOTO: Doug McCarthy 47 of 73 PHOTO: Jenn Castello 48 of 73 PHOTO: Steve Ash 49 of 73 PHOTO: Ilene Gold 50 of 73 PHOTO: Nancy Palmquist 51 of 73 PHOTO: Janice Schneider 52 of 73 PHOTO: Karen Price 53 of 73 PHOTO: Janet Graf 54 of 73 PHOTO: Karlee Neel 55 of 73 PHOTO: Karlee Neel 57 of 73 PHOTO: M. Kim Diehl 58 of 73 PHOTO: WBAL-TVBob Moore 59 of 73 PHOTO: Jaime Arrick 60 of 73 PHOTO: Nick Fischer 61 of 73 PHOTO: Shawn Dreher 62 of 73 PHOTO: Frances Meadows 63 of 73 PHOTO: Megan Hahn 64 of 73 PHOTO: Miranda Verzola 65 of 73 PHOTO: Miranda Verzola 66 of 73 PHOTO: Jennifer Burner 67 of 73 PHOTO: Randy Acosta 68 of 73 PHOTO: Miranda Verzola 69 of 73 PHOTO: Donna Woods 71 of 73 PHOTO: Becky Newcomer 72 of 73 PHOTO: Becky Newcomer 73 of 73 PHOTO: Edward Brause Source link Orbem News #Bug #Cicada #cicadamusic #cicadasong #Creates #KriegerSchechterDaySchool #Pikesville #SaraFuld #scary #song #Students #Teacher
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People, January 13
Cover: Half Their Size -- How We Got Healthy
Page 1: Chatter -- Kit Harington on having a December 26 birthday, Kumail Nanjiani, Kelly Clarkson, Lizzo, Chrissy Teigen on John Legend, Lin-Manuel Miranda
Page 2: 5 Things We’re Talking About This Week -- Star Wars adds cute new alien, Chris Evans dresses up his dog, Kardashians go gift-krazy, John Mayer writes a song called ‘CVS Bag,’, Dr. Dre ruled the decade
Page 4: Contents
Page 6: Holiday Fun in the Sun -- Pippa Middleton and husband James Matthews and her mother Carole in St. Bart’s
Page 7: Chris and Liam Hemsworth in Melbourne after a 10-hour surfing day, Gabrielle Union and daughter Kaavia James in Hawaii, Christie Brinkley in Turks and Caicos, Sofia Vergara and son Manolo and dog Baguette and nephew Rafi
Page 8: Stars in the Snow -- Mariah Carey and Bryan Tanaka, Diana Ross’ family including daughter Tracee Ellis Ross and son Evan Ross, Gwyneth Paltrow and Brad Falchuk, Chris Martin and Dakota Johnson
Page 10: Michael B. Jordan and Kevin Hart at the Lakers/Clippers game, Jennifer Aniston and Rita Wilson and Amanda Anka and Chris McMillan and Laura Dern, The Office reunion Angela Kinsey and Oscar Nunez and Jenna Fischer, Ryan Reynolds and Hugh Jackman take a stroll in NYC
Page 13: Seeing Double -- Elizabeth Hurley and son Damian, Reese Witherspoon and daughter Ava Phillippe, StyleTracks -- silver -- Ava DuVernay, Kim Kardashian West, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Katie Holmes, Celine Dion, Julia Stiles
Page 15: How Alex Trebek is staying strong
Page 16: Hilary Duff ties the knot
Page 19: Katherine Heigl and Josh Kelley happy anniversary, Lindsey Vonn and P.K. Subban engaged again, Angie Harmon and Greg Vaughan surprise proposal, Lauren Sanchez and Jeff Bezos going strong
Page 20: Stephen Dorff -- I’m in the best place I’ve ever been, Justin Bieber plans a comeback
Page 23: SNL’s funny guys in love -- Pete Davidson and Kaia Gerber, Colin Jost and Scarlett Johansson, Bill Hader and Rachel Bilson, Emma Stone and Dave McCary, This Week in People History -- 1982 -- Brooke Shields and Calvin Klein
Page 27: Aaron Paul’s West Hollywood house on sale for $2.198 million, Bethenny Frankel gets serious with her new love Paul Bernon
Page 28: Stories to make you smile
Page 31: Passages, Why I Care -- Trudie Styler and her husband Sting have fought to protect the world’s rain forests
Page 33: People Picks -- 1917
Page 34: Sandition
Page 35: The Outsider
Page 36: Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist, Party of Five
Page 37: Jeopardy! The Greatest of All Time, FBI: Most Wanted
Page 39: Books
Page 40: Princess Kate Middleton, Prince William and the kids -- The Royals’ busy holidays
Page 44: What happened to Cheryl Coker?
Page 46: New Bachelor Peter Weber -- I’m on top of the world
Page 52: Cover Story -- We Lost Half Our Size!
Page 67: Pets get healthy
Page 73: We Cut Half Our Stress
Page 91: Second Look -- Jimmy Kimmel hosts Force Family Feud with Chewbacca, Kelly Marie Tran, Keri Russell, John Boyega, Oscar Isaac, J.J. Adams, Daisy Ridley, Billy Dee Williams, Anthony Daniels and Naomi Ackie
Page 92: One Last Thing -- Tiffany Haddish
#tabloid#tabloid toc#half their size#alex trebek#kate middleton#princess charlotte#peter weber#The Bachelor#snl#saturday night live#Colin Jost#scarlett johansson#pete davidson#kaia gerber#emma stone#dave mccary#bill hader#rachel bilson
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