Spike and Jenny could’ve been besties. You can’t tell me if Jenny was around in season four she wouldn’t invite sad cat Spike in and give him blood mixed with booze. They could shit talk Angel, not to mention help each other out with their respective love lives, since Jenny is a stylish boss babe and Spike is a bookworm gentleman, meaning if they need to get a present for their partner they just have to hit each other up to get ideas. They’d play video games together like the nerds they are and tease each other to death
Bonus: you can’t tell me Jenny would’ve let Faith stay in a motel room if she was around in season 3, meaning we get more friendship goals (plus Buffy gets two smoking hot partners, good for her)
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Hadestown as Things I, My Friends, Colleagues, and Teachers Have Said
In honor of purchasing Working on a Song: The Lyrics of Hadestown (which is fantastic) and desperately missing high school, theatre, and high school theatre, I now present choice selections from the 200-page-strong document of quotes my friends and I compiled during high school (as well as a few personal, apocryphal favorites) in the mode and style of Hadestown.
Enjoy!
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Hades, to Orpheus: You have the stealth skills of a police siren.
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Eurydice: Take me out. On a date or murder, I don't care. That's my life's motto.
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Orpheus: Look back with acceptance? But what if you look back and you're just like "Wow, I sucked"?
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Hermes, to Orpheus: you’re [singing] for people that disagree, even hate you a little bit. The people that would run over your dog in the street, back up over him, point and laugh, and do it again. You’re writing for the people that would run over your dog.
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Orpheus: My brain isn't working. It just stopped. You know I love my solfege but I'm really struggling.
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The Workers: Ma'am? Ma'am what's your name?
Peresphone: Ask me when I'm sober darling.
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Eurydice: I'M FINE. I'M NOT HUNGRY. I'M NOT ABOUT TO CRY. I'M NOT TIRED.
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Eurydice: You can have my phone. You can have my empanada. But you can't have my Chips
The Fates: So can I have your phone?
Eurydice: NO
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Hades: Why do you have Skittles?
The Workers: I got them from my dealer.
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Hades: Have you ever considered being an orphan?
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Eurydice: Wait what did I just pinky promise to?
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Hermes: Realistically, the solution to your problem is to become a necrophile
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Hermes: I haven't had a mental breakdown in months, I'm kind of worried.
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Hades: Pandemics may come and go, but Capitalism is forever.
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Eurydice: It's cozy here at rock bottom
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Orpheus: When I find myself in times of trouble, Karl Marx comes to me
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Persephone: Grief? That's what liquor is for!
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Hermes: The point that you are making is a moot point, but it is not a mute point, as you are still talking.
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Persephone: Y'know, I think cocaine has gotten a bad rap
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Orpheus: Saying "Red is sus" is McCarthyism
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Hermes, to Orpheus: Y'know, you would benefit a great deal from a CBD prescription.
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