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jammie3132 · 10 months

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Fandom: Glee Pairing: Blaine Anderson & Sebastian Smythe Chapter Title: Back to November Chapter Summary: It's been 12 years since he met Sebastian. 11 years since he lost Sebastian and Sam. 10 hours since Tony Stark appeared in a hologram telling him there's a way to fix it.

It would change everything he's ever known...no relationships with Tony, Brittany, Dave, Xavier or Clint. He doesn't even know if the Sebastian and Sam he'd wind up with were the Sebastian and Sam he dreamed of.

Screw it...he wants them back!

10 Days of Seblaine 2023 Day 10: I Want You Back Only 3 Days late! 🎉🎉🎉

Note: Endgame is over. Be prepared for sciency-timey-whimey/canon-schmanon/I made this crap up explanations.

November 9th, 2023

It's been 12 years since he met Sebastian. 11 years since he lost Sebastian and Sam. 10 hours since Tony Stark appeared in a hologram beaming out of a lightsaber telling him there was a way to get them back.

But that was for another time. Today was about Tony.

You were never my Dirty Little Secret. I didn’t build Dalton to replace my workspace at the house in Malibu. You were never a replacement for Peter. You might have never said anything, but I knew. Of course, I knew because…say it with me…I’m a genius. But I’m also an idiot. Forgive me?

Before I go, I want to share this one last piece of my vast wisdom…I love you, Blaine Anderson. It’s time for you to love yourself.

“What do you think, Sammy? Is it time for me to love myself?” The dog rolled over so Blaine could rub his tummy. “Yeah, I know you love me. I love you too.”

Blaine tried to push aside Tony’s complete message until later, but it was impossible. Prior to watching the hologram, he’d only been told the cliff note version of how the Snap became the Blip. It involved time travel and shrinking to the size of Ant Man. Except for Natasha (obviously), they’d thought it had gone well. No one anticipated Nebula being swapped out for her past version, her letting Thanos through the time portal and…KABOOM!!

But now he had the full story...and a decision. Besides the lightsaber, Tony left him everything required to go back to save Sebastian and Sam, as well as some (emphatic) advice. Before he makes a rash decision, fully understand the possible ramifications.

He wouldn’t be there to prevent Brittany’s genius being discovered. Dave and Sebastian’s friendship could be affected, a friendship that helped Dave recover after his suicide attempt. Xavier might never realize what a truly amazing person his son was. Sammy would die without his early round-the-clock care. Lots of the animals he brought to Dalton would’ve died.

Tony and Clint wouldn’t have him during the five worst years of their lives.

Thomas Anderson, the man who put him on a Nazi hit list, would be free to find new ways to make his life hell.

And there was no guarantee the Sebastian and Sam he'd wind up with were the Sebastian and Sam he’d dreamed of for over a decade.

He closed his eyes to quiet his mind. He had no idea what to do. In his past life, the one before half the world disappeared, he’d look for signs. Like the one that day in Miss Pillsbury’s office that told him to trust Dave. Like the one that told him to protect Brittany no matter what. Like the one that would never let him cut off his relationship with Tony no matter how mad he was.

Like the one currently telling him to read Sebastian’s letter.

He moved Sammy and ran to the wall safe. His hands were shaking so badly he had to ask Saturday to open it for him. Then, as usual, he began to overthink. After all these years of not being ready, why now?

What could have Sebastian written all those years ago that would help with his decision?

The only way to know for sure was to read the damn thing.

It wasn’t the grand proclamation of love he assumed when Dave told him why Sebastian wrote him the letter, it was so much better. This was the Sebastian he remembered.

Killer,

When you’re ready, come get me.

Sebastian

ONE MONTH LATER

Blaine’s first attempt talking with Professor Hulk…Bruce, was a disaster. The Scientist/Superhero never had to turn all the science mumbo-jumbo speak into what Blaine understands speak. Tony had always been there to translate. Which meant, even though he didn’t want her involved, he’d never be able to make a final decision without Brittany.

Bruce volunteered to come to Dalton. He was one of the few people who knew what was hiding in the basement. But he was the only person who knew what was in Tony’s final shipment.

“But they say Do not open. That includes you, Anderson” Brittany pointed out as she and Blaine helped the injured Avenger open the boxes.

“And if Tony didn’t give Blaine the lightsaber, we wouldn’t be opening them. Tony wanted backups of the technology we used in the Time Heist. He didn’t trust the government, meaning Ross…if he returned, wouldn’t confiscate it when they found out what we did. And of course, Tony Stark was right. They did.”

Department of Damage Control not only confiscated the pad built to send Steve back to return the stones, they declared the battle site off-limits.

Blaine let a snort/chuckle due to the picture in his head. “Of course, Tony was right. God, he’d be insufferable and pissed at the same time.”

Bruce was no longer paying attention. He was focused on the content of the boxes. “Ah, here they are. Blaine, would you pick up that small box?”

“Sure.” The only small box he saw was covered in some kind of cooling container. “This one?”

“Yes. What’s the temperature?”

“4 degrees Celsius.”

“Perfect. I need you to open the box very carefully. One of the downsides of my transformation is the inability to pick up small objects without crushing them.” Blaine opened the box and found several small vials full of a red fluid. “Good, none of them broke. Put them in the refrigeration unit and we can talk.”

The three of them sat on the floor and Bruce began to fill in holes. What they’d found was PYM Particles. PYM Particles were necessary to get to the Quantum Realm. That started Bruce and Brittany down a sciency-timey-whimey rabbit hole, so Blaine went to fix lunch.

When he returned, the rest of the final boxes were unpacked, Bruce explaining each item to Brittany. There was some sort of space suit and a bunch of laptops and other computer related items. The supply shipments he’d received in the past couple months were materials needed to build a portal and control panel. The boxes delivered right before Thanos attacked the Avengers Compound were what was necessary to make it all work. Unknowingly, Tony got them to Blaine at the last possible minute.

After lunch (which cost half his monthly food budget for the eight people currently living at Dalton) Bruce left with the promise to be available if Blaine decided to go back. He told the giant, green scientist no matter what, his final decision wouldn’t be until after the new year.

He’d promised Brittany a big, over-the-top Christmas at Dalton.

January 14, 2024

Blaine tried not to think of Bruce’s unexpected video call as a sign, but he was failing. Today would have been Sebastian’s 29th birthday.

“Is this stuff Britt will need to translate for me? You didn’t say she had to be here.”

“No, but it is a little complicated. Just ask questions if you’re confused.”

“Ok, what’s up?”

“I know you saw Steve at Tony’s memorial but there’s a reason we’ve kept what happened to him a bit of a mystery.”

“He’s not living on the moon?”

“No, the truth is actually even more unbelievable. After the service, Steve took the stones back like I promised the 2012 Sorcerer Supreme. He just didn’t come back….”

“He disappeared?”

“No, he went back to WWII and then had a life with Peggy Carter.”

“That’s not possible.”

“I assure you...”

Blaine folded his arms and leaned back into the couch as Sammy sat up to attention. “I don’t care. No way.”

Bruce tried to channel his inner Tony Stark to…yeah, that wasn’t going to work. “Why?”

“Because no way in hell would Steve Rodgers go live a happily ever after with Peggy Carter without saving Bucky Barnes from becoming the Winter Soldier first. He’d never sacrifice one of the loves of his life for the other.”

“Um…what?”

“The Avengers, well…not Clint, believe Steve Rogers, Captain fucking America, stormed a Hydra infested castle all by himself in World War II to rescue his childhood best friend?”

Now the supposed genius was even more confused. “Uh, yeah.”

“Left SHIELD, Peggy Carter’s legacy, immediately after discovering it was partially run by Nazis with flying battleships and millions of names on a kill list, including yours and mine, to find his army buddy?”

“Well…”

“Fought Iron Man in a Battle Royal, gave up his shield and destroyed the fucking Avengers to protect a poor tortured soul he knew 70 years ago?” Before Bruce could ask what the hell he was implying, Blaine added “I ship Stucky.”

"Ship?"

"Fan of the relation...ship, and I'm not talking not friendship."

Ok…oh…OH!! He and Tony always assumed Steve was a virgin. Maybe that only meant women. “Ok, that’s a lot to handle.”

“And he didn’t tell Peggy about Hydra being in SHIELD? Or stop the death of Tony’s parents? Or tell Thor what his brother was up to and stop the Invasion of NYC? Or…”

“Ok, ok, I get it. And if you could give me a minute to stop my mind from completely exploding, I might be able to explain, even the no rescuing Bucky part.”

Bruce took the fact the dog curled back down beside his owner as the sign Blaine was calm enough to continue.

“Steve didn’t come back through the portal after he returned the stones, but he did return. He was sitting on a bench 20 yards away, but he was old…over 100 years old, old and he had no idea what was going on.”

“What do you mean? Like dementia?”

“No, like no idea. Clues from his surroundings allowed him to fake his way through a conversation with Sam. Next thing Sam and I knew, Bucky had Steve on a plane to Wakanda. Evidently, he has a place there…” Blaine cocked an eyebrow and the thoroughly discombobulated man(?) paused when he realized why.

He had never seen Tony in Blaine before but now he’d swear he was his late friend’s long, lost younger brother.

“Ok, well, a few days ago, a Princess there, Shuri, she’s a lot like Brittany, she contacted me. Steve’s memory has returned, for the most part.”

“Great, I hope he and Bucky are happy. What does this have to do with me?”

“We had just enough PYM Particles for Steve to return all the stones and come back…or back to WWII. We only had those because Steve and Tony had to go back…”

“The 2012 Hulk got pissed about some stairs, 2023 Ant-man gave 2012 Tony a heart attack, and something about Alexander Pierce, America’s Ass and 2012 Loki disappearing with the 2012 Tesseract. Tony and Steve go to 1970 Camp Lehigh to get WWII Tesseract and raid Hank Pym’s lab.”

“I’m finally seeing the biggest difference between you and Peter. You get right to the point where he would have referenced Back to the Future or…”

“Bruce!” Blaine took a breath then put on a forced smile. “And the difference between you and Tony is he would have been done with this explanation by now.”

“Not if you told him what you thought about Steve and Bucky living together in Wakanda.”

For the first time since October 17th, Blaine laughed. Not snorted, chuckled or giggled. He laughed so hard it scared Sammy enough to run out of the room. “Maybe, maybe not. Clint came around but probably because his wife Laura is an even bigger Stucky shipper than I am. Now, if I promise to not mention Stucky again, you think you can promise to get…to…the…point?”

“Give me a minute.” Bruce tried to think of ways to streamline what he had left to tell Blaine. Maybe he should call Brittany. No, that girl was definitely a Stucky shipper.

“As Tony and I worked on the gauntlet, I also worked on the plan to get the stones back to where we found them. Steve had already volunteered to do it after Clint told us about the weird guy with a red face on Vormir. Anyway, I was setting up a way to protect the PYM Particles. The increased amount necessary to complete the mission also increased the chances something might happen to one. We had exactly enough to get everything back. And then…”

“What?”

“I spilled a vial.”

Bruce’s comment when they found the box of PYM Particles made more sense. “So, you had to go back for more?” Blaine asked.

“No, I managed to save enough, Tony and I were able to break down the formula and make a replacement, plus the box currently in your basement. That’s the problem.”

“How?”

“The replacement particles were the last Steve used. I set it up myself. When he went back into the Quantum Realm the final time, he expected to come out when and where Bucky fell off the train. He’d save Bucky then make sure WWII Steve got out of the plane, with his shield and the Tesseract, before it crashed into the ice. WWII Steve would have his happily ever after with Peggy."

Blaine was finally beginning to understand. "Our Steve would then come back, give the shield to your Sam and go have his happily ever after on this timeline with Bucky. What happened?"

"I don't know for sure about the Bucky part..."

"Bruce..."

“Fine! Steve didn’t come out at the train accident. He came out on the plane. The thing was he wasn’t on the same timeline as WWII Steve, he was WWII Steve but with all his 2023 Steve memories. He managed to radio Peggy he found a way to get off the plane before it crashed and to send help. He spent almost 48 hours on the ice before they found him, but you know, Super Soldier serum. Unfortunately, by the time he was rescued all 2023 Steve memories were gone. He was WWII Steve again.”

“That would explain Bucky but not how he showed up in 2023 on the same day at the same time, plus 30 seconds.”

“He still doesn’t remember and Shuri’s convinced he won’t. The problem is she can’t tell if it’s a side effect of the replacement particles or that he’s 100 years old. Do you understand what this means for you?”

“Maybe? Something like since my particles are the replacements, if I used them, we have no idea what will happen.”

“Especially since we have the unknowns of Steve having the Super Soldier serum in his system and being considerably older than you. We do have another option. Hank Pym is back. We could ask him. However, the man has hated anyone named Stark for half a century.”

“No offense, but Tony Stark is the reason he and his family aren’t still stuck inside a fucking Hoover somewhere. He can get over himself.”

“And he might, until he found out Tony and I borrowed his formula. We could ask Scott and Hope to feel Hank out but there’s a risk.”

“More than me trying to go back in time with possibly defective, no offense, particles?”

“No…but, depending on Hank’s mood when he’s told what Tony and I did, there’s a good chance he’d turn us in to Ross and the DODC. Dalton would be raided, you and anyone living there would be taken into custody, and…”

“And Ross would get his hands on Brittany despite everything Tony and I did all those years to prevent that from happening. Bruce, I’m sorry for how I’ve behaved. I know you’re just trying to help. But I think I need to be alone right now.”

“I understand. And Blaine, I know I’m not Tony, but if you need me, don’t hesitate to call.”

February 3, 2024

Brittany planned a surprise party for his birthday. Her idea of surprise was it was on Saturday, two days before his actual birthday on Monday. The fact she was constantly on the phone making arrangements with him in the same room, ordered everything using Dalton’s accounts with local stores, and kicked him out of the Warblers Commons (living room!) so she could decorate didn’t make a difference. It was a surprise party, so he acted surprised.

God, he’d missed her so much during those 5 years.

Besides Dave, his newly returned father and Xavier, she invited former New Directions and Warblers. She also invited Pamela and Cooper. He’d only seen Pamela Anderson once since she Blipped back. In his mind, she wasn’t his mother anymore and hadn’t been for a long time. As much as he wanted to let go of his anger, he couldn’t forgive her role in the Christmas ambush all those years ago.

Cooper had a role as well, but it was not giving him a heads-up when he found out the ambush was happening. The brothers talked about it during Cooper’s stay at Dalton the first 6 months after the Snap and he eventually forgave him…but Blaine never forgot. This time there was no chance of reconciliation.

However, if he was going to do what Tony offered, he needed to say goodbye. Even if Cooper and Pamela didn’t know that’s what he was doing.

The next weekend was his real party with his real family. Dave, Xavier and Brittany (and Sammy) were there but so were Pepper, Morgan, Clint, Laura and the kids. They hadn’t been to Dalton yet and he was pretty sure Nate wasn’t leaving without a dog. Morgan was doing a pretty good job on Pepper too, but her focus was a fluffy white kitten.

Pepper was in Ohio for another reason as well. The return of half the world’s population of animals was more traumatic than when they disappeared. Dalton was full again in a matter of days but Blaine kept letting them come. They managed, and it was a great distraction for that other thing, but they had to have a better plan than the old one of Tony sending supplies every few weeks to disguise his shipments of Iron Man technology.

That’s where Stark Enterprise's CEO came in. There was an abandoned baby food factory not too far away. Pepper finished the purchase while she was in town. The two of them planned to convert it to a pet food factory. Dalton needed the supplies and locals needed the jobs. It was a boon for everyone.

It was also a way for him to take care of his animals if he decided to take Tony offer.

But the person wanted to talk to the most was Clint. So, while everyone else watched Morgan, Nate, Lila and CB (a name agreed to when Blaine felt odd calling the Barton’s oldest child Cooper) ride the horses, the Birthday Boy and retired Archer grabbed a couple beers and went inside to have a chat.

“So, this is the infamous letter? Sebastian was a man of few words. I like him even more now.”

“You never met Bas.”

“But you loved him and Sam…in different ways, of course. You barely knew Nat and never met Vision, but you cried when Wanda and I told you stories about them.”

“I cry at Christmas commercials…at least I used to.”

“You made my point. Now, not that I’m not eternally grateful, but why are we in here instead of the barn? My wife is going to have a few words for us for leaving her alone with Nate and his pleas to go home with Sammy’s brother.”

“Thor is a great puppy.”

“He’s also around 6 months old. Do you remember when Sammy was 6 months old…5 years ago? That’s still so weird.”

“Think how I felt when I found out the golden retriever mother and litter of puppies brought in was Sammy’s family. Though it was amazing to watch the reunion. Sammy and his mom knew each other immediately. When you guys planned to bring everyone back, did you remember it meant animals too?”

“Not really but Scott says he figured out it worked because of the birds. I figured it out when I realized no one at the cell phone company ever got around to cancelling the accounts of people who Snapped. Then Thanos bombed the compound into oblivion and the rest is history. Why are you asking?”

Blaine went to the wall safe, put Sebastian’s letter back in and brought out a box he put in front of Clint. “Open it.”

Clint began to laugh when he saw the contents. “Stark finally built you a lightsaber.”

“It’s not a lightsaber.”

Hey, Bow! Miss me?

“Oh shit!” Blaine sat silently while the former Avenger watched the hologram his late teammate left behind. When it finished the lightsaber went back into the safe and he went back to the couch to wait for Clint to say something.

It didn’t take as long as he thought it would. “That’s the shit Banner was so frantic to find? Still can’t believe it took less than an hour. But it was some sort of miracle we found everything safe in a pocket of the building untouched by the rubble. Then again, I probably fell 200 feet down, had barely even a scratch and the Infinity Stones lying next to me.”

“That explains one of the questions I had for Bruce, but no. Everything I need Tony had been shipping back here the entire time you guys were building what you needed for the Time Heist.”

“Stark was sending shit to you?”

“Saturday, open basement.”

Clint watched the bookcases separate and shook his head. That was such a Tony Stark move. Five minutes later he was shaking his head again but this time also swearing at the top of his lungs.

“Stark wanted everyone to sign…he fucking signed, those fucking Sokovia Accords, giving the government oversight over the Avengers and the entire time he was hiding shit here in your basement at Dalton to keep it away…FROM THE FUCKING GOVERNMENT?!!”

“Yes, but if you could put Ronan back in the box for the time being, I really need this to be about me for the next few minutes.”

“Low blow Anderson. Also, well played. Start talking.”

Blaine told him everything from the moment he watched the hologram the first time. All the changes the change in his timeline could make, the voice telling him to open Sebastian’s letter, Bruce’s visit, the unexpected call from Bruce telling him about what happened to Steve and how all his particles were the replacement particles, how they couldn’t ask Hank Pym for new ones because of the treat he would turn them into Ross and the DOCD.

After a recap of the Great Stucky Debate so Clint could get a clear picture of Bruce’s reactions, he only had one question. “When are you going?”

“I haven’t decided to do it.”

“Kid, you decided the minute Sebastian told you to come find him.”

"You're right, I did. I want him back."

November 8, 2024

There was never any other date. 13 years since he met Sebastian. 12 years since he lost Sebastian and Sam. 1 year since Tony Stark gave him way to get them back.

It was also enough time to, for lack of a better term, put his affairs in order.

The pet food factory was running and highly successful, not only by providing for animals but they created more jobs than anticipated.

Just in case, he signed the deed to Dalton over to both Dave and Xavier. Dave was going to run Dalton farm but Xavier was to rebuild the school. It was to be in the image of Dalton Blaine remembered, but open to anyone (boy or girl) in need of a place to stay. So many people, not just those who Blipped, were in constant transit looking for jobs. The New Dalton would be a boarding school where children would be not only educated but well cared for (in a zero-tolerance environment) while their parents found stability.

Brittany gave him no choice. Sammy was staying with her. She and Blaine bonded over their loss of the real Sammy and she needed a cuddle buddy to sleep with. Lord Tubbington wasn’t a cuddler.

How that damn cat was still alive was beyond comprehension.

When the time came, the only people he wanted there were Bruce and Clint. They all knew Clint was moral support, Bruce was in charge.

It took the scientist a couple visits to realize they were missing one of Tony’s GPS wrist bands. It took devouring Tony’s copious notes to figure out the lightsaber hilt replaced it. Blaine’s Quantum suit had a special pocket inside his right sleeve where it fit. The button above the red on was for going back and the one on the bottom was for coming home.

The date and time Blaine chose to return to was November 8, 2012, as he and Sam arrived at Dalton to convince then-Warbler Captain Clarington to help him get use of the Grand Staircase to serenade his self-absorbed ex. He’d get Sam alone, tell him he changed his mind and to go back to Lima for his date with Brittany. Leaving over 2 hours sooner meant Sam would avoid the accident…easy-peasy.

The problem was getting his Kurt Hummel-mind-controlled former self to remember the date, the significance behind it and find out why Sebastian was upset all before leaving Dalton. Then the idiot had to not only realize he was really in love with Sebastian but stop him from going to his weekly dinner with Dave. Once accomplished, he presses the home button and comes back to live with the timeline changes he made.

If his replacement particles weren’t so fucked up he wound up wrestling dinosaurs in a real-life Jurassic Park.

Blaine came out of his thoughts when he heard “You’re good to go.” Next thing he knew Bruce began counting backwards from 10, Clint gave him a thumbs up and he pressed the top button on his lightsaber.

It becomes a blur after that.

November 8, 201…

The blur ended and Blaine was in the hall of the former Dalton. He immediately noticed two problems…he was wearing a grey and white striped cardigan and could hear the beginning of Uptown Girl down the hall.

It wasn’t the day he lost Sebastian. It was the day he found him.

Fuck!

TBC

Notes:

Tried to tell you…sciency-timey-whimey/canon-schmanon/I made this crap up. Hopefully, I included enough back story to make it work for you. HOWEVER, true to form for me, I underestimated and one more chapter is necessary to finish.

I don’t care how smart those people were. Or that they had a Super Soldier, a Hulk, 2 men with suits to give them super strength, and a (out of shape) God on the team. With only those 5, 2 mere mortals, a Cyborg and an enhanced Racoon, it would have taken at least a couple months to build what they did. Plenty of time for Tony to send parts somewhere else for safekeeping. And how they all felt about the government by then (even Rhodey), I don’t believe any of the others would question his actions (even Steve).

The Christmas Ambush was in Character 3.

Some sort of miracle = plot armor. I’d like to thank Clint Barton for the example.

#10daysofseblaine2023 #Day 10 #I Want You Back #seblaine #blaine anderson #sebastian smythe #seblaine fic #MCU Inspired #Blaine is a Stucky shipper

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dylanlila · 3 years

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I agree that Charlie Dalton will 100000% break into someone's house just to pet their dog and no, I will not take any criticism because he's a precious bean :"))

Glad somebody agrees with me on this💕 Charlie is actually the biggest softie out there, I guarantee you that he's that friend who remembers everyone's birthdays and each and every conversation he had with them (no matter how little the information he receives from them might seem) I'm probably projecting on him or something, but it's how I view him.

charlie 🤝 being the epitome of the "I would die for you (in secret)" taylor swift lyrics

Charlie's like: *hears you talking about your favourite candy flavour* - two months later - *buys that exact candy, puts it on the table and doesn't say a word about it*

that's charlie in my head, idc I'm also not taking any criticism

there are some major dean winchester vibes in this post, maybe I'm dean after all

#im also the epitome of that lyrics but we're not gonna dig into that today #charlie dalton #charlie my beloved #dead poets society #💌restless wind inside a letter box💌#mutuals love #im dean #problem solved #i just love sam too much to admit that im not like him #sorry for the supernatural mentions😅

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emachinescat · 3 years

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I've decided to watch MacGyver from the beginning (again), and I'm live tweeting the experience with every tweet tagged with #savemacgyver. I thought it would be fun to share my collected thoughts from the episodes on here as well.

My Thoughts on S1E1, "The Rising"

Good old Lake Como.

"How do I look?" Always amazing, Mac, though here you are so bebby. Gosh, tiny Lucas is tiny.

Ugggh, Nikki. My least favorite story arc in the show. Even with her redemption arc, even her face makes me mad.

I am soooo glad this awkward flirting is only in this episode. Mac and Nikki have never vibed with me.

JACK DALTON

"Who loves ya, baby?" We all do, Jack.

I always wished they would have played more into the original Mac's reason for not carrying a weapon - not just so he doesn't get caught but because he doesn't like them. That was actually one reason I used to be so upset at the reboot when it first came out. I still feel like Mac's character was off for this first episode - a little too cocky, not super developed. But still lovable, and with so much potential!

It's so cool to see how much Lucas has grown into this character over the years, really making it his own while still holding on to its essence.

Lol "serious bad-assery" - Nikki thinks she's so cool. (Spoiler: she's not.)

Lololol Nikki is the Walmart brand of Riley.

Mac in glasses. Adorbs.

Man, I'm already so ready for Matty. Patti is the off brand version of her.

I always love watching Mac rifle through stuff to find his improvisation supplies!

First MacSplaining session! Electromagnets!

"Is this George Clooney's house?" I miss Jack so freaking much.

Mac kind of looks like a penguin with that waiter outfit on and I'm living for it.

The second Mac hack is so Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew.

"Why don't you ever flirt with me like that?" Um, Jack, do you want your partner's girlfriend flirting with you, daddy fixation or not?

There are two kinds of oops, accordng to Jack Dalton: Oops - I just stubbed my toe / Ooooooops - Zombie apocalypse initiated.

Mac's hair is so shaggy.

"START THE DAMN BOAT!" Classic.

"Hold this and get out of my way." Dang, Mac.

The bad guy is the dude from Galavant hahaha. I know this guy has been in so many things, but he will always be Gareth to me. (That's his name, right? Gareth?)

W H U M P

I actually love the consistency of Mac always having that scar even seasons into the series (except for the last time, in the river). Overall great attention to detail!

That is a LOT of blood in the water.

Lol I'm pretty sure Grandpa Harry didn't say that in so many words, Mac.

Poor traumatized bebby. What am I saying? I live for this stuff.

Awww, lil Bozer. So smol. So pure. And now I want waffles.

"Eat your waffles." Three words I will never say no to.

"Give me Wang." -Bozer, 2016

Am I the only one who finds these intimate scenes between Mac and Nikki hella awkward?

QUARANTINE, sounds familiar.

Lol "cyberteam." Once Riley Davis comes along, they will be obsolete.

Jack just wants a hug.

I always hated the clinical white room in the pilot. Can't wait for the War Room.

I love the interactions between Jack and Riley.

Mac and Riley EYE CONTACT.

"You two are on timeout from now on." 😂😂😂

THE MOMENT WHERE HE GRABS HER HANDS

Lol, thanks for telling me that's a paperclip. I was so confused.

"Riley has so much hair!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

I love how Riley takes charge. Her confidence is 🔥🔥🔥

"You know what, never mind, I'd be pissed at you too." 🤣

Jack's so proud of his daughter. 💕

"Is that real?" Bless Jack's heart. He's such an old man.

Patti is a square. Pretty, competent, but boring. I miss Matty.

"My man never jokes about tin foil."

Ooooo Nikki is alive. Poor Mac. His whole world keeps getting turned on its head.

Jack can be scary when he wants to be.

Poor, poor, Mac. When he faces Nikki, he looks like a kicked golden retriever. (Also, NEVER kick a dog.)

I'm just eating up all this angst.

Mr. Wizard lololol

Mac hanging from a plane is soooo iconic.

"Don't get cocky. You're the only other one here." Haha, the SASS on this girl.

"Go ahead, you aready had me killed once." Also, oof. Undercover or not, Nikki is cold. I can't stand her.

Excuse me, Patricia, but I would consider running over your neighbor's dog (or any dog) a damn catastrophe, too.

"Sometimes a purge is necessary to fix what's broken." Codex, anyone?

Love this whole chase/fight sequence so much. The music, action, everything... perfect.

The sweat on Mac's forehead when dangling out of the 🚁 - such a great detail!

"YOU GO KABOOM, I GO KABOOM"

Kind of weird to me that Mac seems to be using so much guesswork with this bomb, especially when we know that he's one of the best specialists out there.

That fight scene in the back of the vehicle is one of my all time favorites. The whump is excellent.

Okay, but when does MacGyver ever do anything the way Jack has in mind?

DIY or die. Still so lame, lol. The parachute is awesome, though.

Oof. That landing looks painful and the whumper in me loves it. Even more, I can't get over how worried Jack is as he rushes to Mac's side. ❤️❤️❤️

That break in his voice when he asks if Mac's okay is just... AYSKTUFYIFUYliIIGUOG

Mac burning Nikki's pics like that old Taylor Swift song.

Bozer calling Jack his bestie is so weird and funny to me.

I am so ready for Bozer to get over Riley. They are so much better as friends.

Lol "Those fries won't cook themselves." The crack of a whip, man.

Jack calling Riley a little rascal and then gently asking Mac if he's doing all right there, pal ... taking care of his kids, and I am DYING.

The Three Amigos... come on, Jack. You can do better than that.

Is it bad that I'm actually a little surprised that Jack knows what a Phoenix is? Just seems like something he wouldn't care to learn, especially since he's a sci fi junkie but I never really hear him talk about fantasy.

Oooooooo Nikki's on the loose. Gotta end with suspense, to hook those viewers and make them want more. Well, I want more of this show, but not because of her.

Well, awesome re-watch of episode 1. Definitely not my favorite by a long shot, but so iconic and with some amazing moments! It just makes me that much more excited to get to see the show and the characters grow!

If anyone wants to join me in my re-watching and tweeting adventure, please do! It's my way to take about an hour a day in my busy, busy life to commit to the #savemacgyver movement. (And to enjoy my favorite show yet again!) If you do tweet as you watch, make sure to tag EVERY tweet with ONLY #savemacgyver so we can keep that hashtag trending! :)

Thanks for letting me share my (numerous) thoughts on this episode. This was really fun, and I hope it's something you all enjoy, too. I'll probably go ahead and post episode 2 tonight since I just watched it. I'd love to know what you all think of the episode in the comments! ❤️

#macgyver #jack dalton #riley davis #wilt bozer #macgyver rewatch #my thoughts #episode review #tweet compilation #with minor edits for an easier tumblr experience #savemacgyver #please join me in my rewatch and tweeting on twitter #using the hashtag savemacgyver #we can save our show #pilot episode #emcatreviews #s1e1 #the rising #spoilers

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angelisverba · 4 years

Text

no need to be sorry

in which y/n realizes she loves Jason, and he can’t touch himself to the thought of her because it makes him feel guilty

word count: 12.8k

pairing: y/n and her brother’s best friend, jason

warning: strong mentions of sexual trauma and abuse. please read at your own caution if you are not comfortable with that .

author’s note: originally this was supposed to be a super long piece (and the last one) but i wanted to put something else to make the last part even longer :) THIS IS NOT EDITED, sorry not sorry hehe

March is a very confusing month.

For y/n, it meant SAT cramming and intensive camps for the retake in may. A maxed out speed on her brain as to keep up her grades (and even improve them because God knows her math grade needs urgent care) and constantly keep her nose in her books because finals were approaching soon.

For Jason, and the entire senior class for that matter, it meant renting out tuxedos and making appointments at the beauty salon in preparation for prom, buying tickets for prom, finding a prom date, asking out said date in a cutesy way that was memorable for both parties.

It meant asking y/n to be his prom date, but not drag her away from her studies because that just wouldn’t be fair.

Hell, Jason still hadn’t taken his girl out on a second date because she was such a busy bee, and had to settle for ‘study dates’. Really it was just him watching her chew on her bottom lip as she transferred notes from her chemistry textbook to her notebook, his own work splayed out in front of him, meaning to be completed but his attention diverted elsewhere. She’d glance up with burning cheeks to tell him that his glasses were sliding down his nose, and Jason— quite nearly in a hypnotic daze— would smile dopily at her and say ‘you’re so pretty’. She would shush him and tell him to get to work, or sometime ask for his help, and Jason would use that as an excuse to wrap his arm around her waist telling her ‘gotta whisper love, come close’ and proceed to explain how the law of gas, ideal gas, and Dalton’s Law of partial pressure differentiated from each other.

He didn’t mind this. Any time he got with her he treasured, but god did he want to keep her tucked at his side at all times to show him off. It was selfish of him to be jealous that she wasn’t spending time with him when all she wanted to do was study for her future; for college. Selfish because Jason already had everything worked out. He’d gotten a scholarship to his dream school via football and his good-ish grades. Dorming and transportation was all set-up; he was 100% ready to go.

But y/n? She’d confessed to Jason that she had no idea what she was doing with her life. That she was studying and doing all these things to look good for her college application, but her biggest fear was that they still wouldn’t accept her and she’d wind up going to community college. There were times where her bouncing leg would violently shake their table in the library so much, Jason would drag her out of the chair and take her on a short walk around the library (if her eyes were teary he’d sneak her into a corner and peck at her eyelids softly until she giggled). An effective strategy that resulted in a noticeable tent at his crotch, and a dreamy-eyed y/n that peeked up at him through her lashes with heated cheeks.

He’d say, “Are you relaxed now? Or should we go home?”

Home was his house. Y/n had her home, and Jason had his- respectively- but he referred to his place as ‘home’ and she never bothered to correct him. More often than not (once it got to this point) y/n would nod and they’d head over to his place.

And, well, who was she to pass up that opportunity?

Y/n enjoyed reading her dog-eared SAT book on Jason’s bed and falling asleep on her crossed arms. Only because she would wake up an hour or so later, glued next to his side, with him also napping, lips puffy and hair extra fluffy. His hair, how a complete chocolate brown color, closely cropped since he’d cut off all the blond, fanned on the pillow and curled around the frames of his tortoise-shell glasses that he never remembered to take off.

She’d always take them off for him, and the movement would startle him awake, his green eyes fluttering awake, eyebrows furrowed in a confusion that disappeared when he realized that it was just her. His sweet y/n with sleepy eyes who took his glasses off ever so gently, and reached over him to place them on his bedside.

They were wrapped up in their own little personal heaven when they were together, alone, and it was only disrupted when it was time for Jason to take y/n home. Grabby hands and kissy faces consumed them when she received a questioning text from her parents or brother, and the whole ‘do you really have to go’ ordeal took its course. And maybe- just maybe- Jason enjoyed the goodbyes because y/n always put extra effort into her goodbye kiss, leaning and pressing up against his mouth so their noses were squished against each other, her hand at the collar of his shirt to pull him even closer, communicating to him how much… how much she would miss him.

She knew that Jason understood, and when they broke apart with a wet suction noise, and her eyes fluttered open to meet his, Jason knew that she knew that he knew what she was trying to say. It was a slight moment of vulnerability on her part, because it was the closest they’d get to admitting/discussing the sexual parts of their relationship. Or rather, the lack of.

But never mind that, it didn’t matter to any of them. They could be intimate without having sex.

Right?

* * *

Jason was confused.

As silly as it was, prom was a big deal. It signified the closing of an era in a teenager’s life; the end of high school. A party to honor their struggles and begin a transition to a period of more struggles.

Traditionally, you attend a dance with a date. A girlfriend, a crush, a last resort. One could go with friends but, Jason has a girlfriend now and he’d be damned if he didn’t take his pretty girl and show off that he was the one that got her in the end.

The only issue was: the prom-posal.

He knew that y/n and him didn’t hang in the same crowd, and while they were both mellow, y/n held a little more reserve to public announcements.

She was shy.

Needless to say, Jason had a very big quest on his shoulders; to find a way to ask y/n out to prom in a way that was memorable and attune to her likings. He thinks he doesn’t think he'd be able to get over it if he messed this up.

“Jason? Bro are you even listening?” Andrew asked from across the lunch table. Kent stuffed french fries into his mouth, and glanced from both his friends.

“Sorry, man. What was that?” Jason presses the lock button on his phone, and places it down on the table.

“I was talking about the rager at Greg’s, is everything alright? You’ve been distant for a few days now, not having issues with y/n are you?” Andrew’s facial features darkened slightly, the deep concerns for his sister shining through his demeanor. Kent picked on the change of atmosphere, and his chewing stops.

Jason sighed, his shoulders slanting downwards and the fabric of his letter-man jacket coming to a close at his chest. His heart-shaped lips come to a pensive pucker, debating if he should tell his best friend what was on his mind.

At the troubled look on his face, Kent smiles encouragingly, and says, “You know you can tell us anything, J.” Andrew turns to look at his Kent while he’s speaking, and when he turns back to Jason, he nods, a knowing glimmer in his eyes.

“What’s up?” His girlfriend’s brother leans forward, prepared to listen.

“I don’t know how to ask y/n to go to prom with me.”

Andrew and Kent’s facial expression drop to a deadpan, and Jason’s eyebrows furrow in response, confused at their reaction.

“What?” He looked back and forth between his two unimpressed friends, who suddenly burst into laughter; snickering and pointing fingers at him through wheezed words.

“You’re fucking whipped,” Kent said, slapping a hand on Andrew’s shoulder and doubling forward.

“My sister,” their laughter calms down momentarily, “has you this upset?” And at his comment, the boys start laughing again, loud enough that it drags the attention of nearby tables.

“Guys,” the corner of Jason’s lips struggle to stay down. “It’s not funny.”

“Yeah, it is. Your panties are in a twist because of y/n,” Kent said, “Where is she?” He stands up from the bench and glances around the cafeteria, looking for her.

Jason’s eyes widen, and his jaw drops, amazed at his friend’s response. “Dicks,” he mutters. “She’s with her English teacher, preparing for an exam.”

Andrew’s chuckles die down again, and he shakes his head while rubbing his fingers on his forehead, grinning. “Deadass?”

“Yes!” Jason juts his head forward, nodding wildly. “Help me!”

Kent sits again, and places his chin on his palm. “Just go with what she likes, man.”

“Gee, thanks so much.” The stressed boy looks away, defeated.

Perhaps, it was a mistake bringing it up. Instead of receiving help, they were taking the piss out of him. He thought that maybe, because Andrew was related to the girl he was dating, he’d be a bit of hel-

“She keeps bugging me to take her to the aquarium.”

Jason whips his head around to look at his friend, crossing his arms on the table and leaning with interest.

“The aquarium?” He asks, eyebrows raising.

“Yeah, they remodeled a few exhibits and she’s been wanting to see them. Sent me a text about it a few days ago,” Andrew reached back to pull out his phone from his back pocket, unlocking it and pulling up a thread of texts from his sister. “Look.”

The boy takes the phone from his friend’s hand. Y/n had sent her brother a link to the aquarium’s announcement of a reopening that occurred a few weeks before, along with ‘pleeease can we go? pleeease?’ and a puppy-eyed emoji. Andrew had only sent a curt ‘we’ll see’ to which the girl responded with screenshots of seals and penguins.

A pang hit him straight in the heart, and he was saddened that she hadn’t asked him, given that he had refrained from taking her out in fear of distracting her from her studies. Yet, here she was asking to be taken to the aquarium, and Andrew showed no interest.

“Take her. Ask her there. The only reason why I haven’t taken her is because she’ll ask for something from the gift shop and they’re expensive as fuck.” Andrew shrugged.

Bingo.

With a composed look, he clicked off the phone and slid it back. On the inside, he was hopping up and down, pumping his arms with joy because everything had clicked, and he knew exactly what to do.

* * *

Y/n still felt butterflies every time Jason looked at her.

Every girl wanted to be looked at by someone the way he looked at her.

A soft, dreamy daze that took over his face, eyes shining with an enamored gleam. Lashes fluttering adoringly, and lips coming together in a smirk, like he held all kinds of secrets and wanted to share them with her. His look alone said it all. I want you and only you.

It was overwhelmingly passionate. So intimate; an open admission with no shame.

“You’re not even paying attention to me,” she whined, flopping over onto her back and throwing an arm over her head.

They were- as usual- laying on Jason’s bed, with one of y/n’s textbooks spread open in front of them.

“Can’t help myself,” he pushed up his glasses and raked his hair back. “You’re so pretty it’s distracting.”

At that, y/n turned herself over so she laid next to Jason again, but her face was still nestled in the crook of her arm where her cheeks flamed. “Stop it,” she said, words muffled.

“I’m serious.” She felt his weight dip on the bed, his hand coming to brush away hair that blocked the side of her face, and then puffs of air on her arm. Tilting her head so her eye peeked out, she saw that Jason’s mouth was hovering millimeters away from her skin, and when her eyes glanced up, an intense emerald gaze fixed on hers. “Like an angel, you are.”

Fire, heat, tingles littered the areas where his lips pressed against a trail into his skin. A blossoming feeling of affection imprinted onto her arm, and up to her cheek, where his lips lingered right underneath her lashes.

It became too much for her to handle, her heart and mind becoming muddled and confused through the overwhelming sensations that traveled throughout her nerves. Her cognitive senses seemed to refuse to acknowledge the difference between welcomed attention and… unwanted but forced attention. And, in efforts to prevent a hysteric scene or breakdown, she sprung up from her position, pressing a quick kiss into Jason’s cheek so he wouldn’t suspect anything, and sitting so she was almost completely off the bed.

Jason watched her with… rejection. But, she wouldn’t know that because she refused to meet his eyes. Instead she said, “Have you got marshmallows in the cupboard?”

“Uhh,” Jason cleared his throat, standing up and heading out of his room. “Yeah, I think so.”

She followed after him, shoulders hunched; ashamed. Mentally, she was pushing away repressed trauma from what seemed like yesterday. A haunting memory that refused to leave like paranoia.

“Tiny ones or…?” He heads straight for the silver door knob next to the fridge, stepping in to squat at the lower shelves. Y/n stands in the doorway, hands awkwardly at her sides.

“The big ones, please.” She doesn’t look up when he extends his hand to give her the fluffy white bag, and he doesn’t ask what's wrong.

Silently, y/n walks over to the kitchen island to pluck a skewer out of the drawer, and pops her hip to shut it. Jason lifts himself to sit on the countertop, his white shirt lifting to expose the pale sliver of skin that escaped from his grey sweatpants. Out the corner of her eye, she could see the enticing movement, and it caused her hands to shake, but she hid it in the twisting wrist movement of turning on the stove.

A tearing noise comes from behind her, blending in with the clicking noises of the stove turning on. Jumping at the startling disruption, she turns to see Jason with an Oreo midway to his mouth. He gives her an open lipped smile, eyes wide as if shocked, and it makes her burst into a chuckle.

“Can I get one?” She asked.

Wordlessly, he passed her a cookie. She took it, and it seemed that he purposely grazed his fingers over her palm.

Y/n yanked her hand away like he’d burned her.

Alarmed, Jason hops off the counter and moves to stand next to her.

“Y/n, is everything al-”

“Do you want a marshmallow?” She interrupted him, her breaths tense.

“Uh, no.” He said, his head slightly shaking in disbelief at her actions. Had he done something wrong?

The girl stabbed the skewer through the white candy, and twirled it over the flames, the edges quickly turning a golden color.

“Baby, what’s wr-”

It catches fire, and her lips blow them off before it turns completely black, the fuh noise that escapes overpowering Jason’s gentle words. She was scared of breaking in front of him. She was scared to show him how much she was holding in.

“Can you hold this?” Voice small and squeaky.

He took the skewer out of her hands, holding it while she opened the oreo cookie. Knowing what she was gonna do, he gingerly placed the melted marshmallow on top of the frosting covered cookie, and pulled away when she sandwiched the top cookie on top.

Y/n takes a bite out of the treat, and relishes in the slightly burnt, woodsy taste of the white taffy and how it melts on her tongue and slides with ease down her throat. So much so, that a small noise of appreciation comes from the depths of her chest.

“S’good?” Jason asked, a breathy-uneasy- laugh whooshing through his nose.

She’s nodding before she looks up at him, and her head stills when she locks eyes with him.

It’s the same, intense, focused look from before.

The one that promised so much. And it just- god she was so confused.

So confused that she leaned forward to kiss him, disregarding the fact that- in that moment- she didn’t want affection. She needed a bit of distance and time to process her emotions.

And instead of doing so, she lunged and connected herself to him in a smoldering embrace of their mouths. A sudden flood of inexplicable physical impressions, claiming, pleading.

Jason didn’t hesitate to respond, his hands appearing to cup at her cheeks, thumbs gingerly rubbing on the apples of her cheeks. He breathes deeply; a sharp inhale into her mouth that pulled his frame taught against hers. The forgotten treat pressed up against the divot of his pectoral muscles.

The instant his tongue snaked into her mouth, he was bombarded with the warm and sweet taste of her mouth. Marshmallows and just her essence crowding over his taste buds; his nose also breathing in the fruity scent of her hair and woodsy burnt candy. Urgently, his lips suckled on her lower lip, y/n gasping at the sudden, ardent actions.

Had she been any other girl, that would have been the night she finally let herself have sex with Jason.

The mood was right; they were both bleeding mad for each other.

But, y/n was y/n and that’s not how she was wired to go. Her mind began again with the confusion, her heart rate picking up double the rates from both the proximity of the boy and what was going to happen if the kiss continued. Did she want this? Fuck, of course she wanted this! Why was she…

“She’s not gonna do it because she’s a prude!” said one of the girls in the room.

“No, I’m n-”

“Yeah, you are y/n. You’re a virgin. Probably wouldn’t even know what to do,” said the same girl.

Y/n had been invited to a party that the cheerleaders in her class were throwing, and boys from rival school had been invited to. They were all sitting in a circle- enough people to fill up the living room of a rich man’s house- playing a game of truth or dare, and they’d just gotten to y/n.

She’d gotten dared to give one of the football players of the opposing school a blowjob… in the middle of the living room, with everyone watching. When they all saw her face fall, redden, and then pale, no one wasted time to verbally pounce on her hesitance.

“Look at her! She’d pathetic Marcy, she’s not gonna do it.” The girl who invited her, Marcy, looked at her with a smirk.

Embarrassed, and just numb to everything that was going on around her as well as what may come depending on her decisions. All she knew is that she needed to do this because she’d look bad if she didn’t. She didn’t want to be known as a prude. Even if she was a virgin. She didn’t want to be thought of badly.

“Yes, I will.” Her meek reply had silenced the whole room.

“Come over here, and blow me.” Chris was a sophomore that was known for his promiscuous ways, and the fact that he had a big… that was evident when y/n came to kneel in front of him.

Shaking, she sat in front of him with wide eyes, her back burning with stares and her heart pounding so hard she could feel it in her hands.

Throughout it all, she felt disgusting. Ashamed. And unable to breathe because the guy wasn’t letting her come off, holding her down with a strong grip in her hair. Tears burned on her lashes and down her cheeks, partly from being unable to breathe, and the other because she was scared.

God, she was so scared. What would happen to her when this got out? What then? When everyone knew what she’d done? There were more than enough witnesses present to attest that she’d given head to a guy she didn’t even know.

She’d felt a hand on her breast, and her eyes snapped open from their painful clench; alarmed. The guy sitting next to Chris had leaned over to touch her, and at her scared look he only laughed and continued to do it. His hand trailed lower and lower, and eventually she felt something hot spill down her aching throat. Her ears were ringing, her eyes bleary.

Much of how she escaped had been... blurred through her panic.

But the feeling… that dreadful, terrorized feeling. It was what deer felt moments before being impacted by a car.

She’d never forget it.

It was the same feeling creeping up on her then. The niggling, freezing, ambushed fear. It’s the reason why she pulled away from him, and said in a wet whisper, “I can’t.”

She hugs her arms across her chest, oreo still in hand, and turns away with her eyes dropped to the floor. Y/n’s mind is reeling, utterly confused and just so scared scared scared.

“Did I do something wrong?” Jason asked, trailing after her to place a comforting hand on her shoulder. His lips are a dark shade of pink, the skin of his cheeks a flushed color; if one were to look down, they’d see the heather grey color of his sweatpants was slightly lifted. But his arousal was pushed aside by his concern towards the small girl, who shivered when his fingers grazed her shoulder. He could see her eyes were shut closed, but a tear escaped to roll down her cheeks, and at that the thick hairs of his brows dipped to crinkle on his forehead. “Y/n?”

“I’m sorry.” She sighed, her words hitching and cracking. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry-”

Jason pulled her into his chest, his head shaking no no no to her apologies. “There’s no need to be sorry, dovie. It’s okay. You’re alright.”

“But I am! I so sorry, Jason. I-” Her words died on her tongue, collapsed by a series of sobs that ruptured out of her lips. She was guilty. So so guilty. She felt like she was lying to him by not telling him of what had… occurred.

“Baby, baby, hey. Y/n,” He pulled back to cup her face with his hands again, forcing her to gaze into his calm, forest eyes. “Listen to me. Deep breaths,” he began to inhale, his chest expanding with the intake of air. “You’re okay. I’m not mad at you for anything, dove.”

“You don’t know what I’ve done,” Y/n sets the cookie on the counter, and goes to wipe at her eyes roughly, Jason tugging at her wrists and doing it himself, shushing her as he does.

“Well I can’t be mad if I don’t know, yeah?” He gives her a small smile. “Do you wanna talk about it?”

“N-no,” she shakes her head. “No, I don’t.”

“Okay.” He nods, still smiling. “That’s okay. I’m here to listen whenever you’re ready.”

Y/n just nodded and gave him a sad attempt to seem happy, but her chin began to tremble, crinkles appearing underneath her lip, and she rushed to dig her nose in the crook of Jason’s neck.

“Oh, sweetheart, I wish you’d tell me what’s got you so upset.” He murmured into her hair, his arms wrapping around her.

“Please, Jason. I don’t wanna,” She sniffled. “Don’t wanna talk about it.”

“Alright. I’ll stop asking. Don’t wanna stress you out anymore, dovie. You need a break as it is.” Jason rubs a warm hand up and down her back soothingly when he feels her nose dip into his collarbone.

She sniffles some more, a slight hiccup in her breaths, and Jason continues, “speaking of breaks,” this catches her attention, and y/n tilts her head so she’s able to rest it in his shoulder and look up at his side profile. “Would you like to go to the aquarium with me next week?”

At this, her head springs up so she’s eye level with Jason, her wet eyes gleaming as a surprised smile plays on her mouth. “The aquarium?”

“Yes, the aquarium.” Jason laughed at her response, his eyes flitting between hers. The skin of his chin crinkled because he was looking down at her, and y/n wondered how he still managed to look so good with a double chin. “A little birdy told me you’ve been wanting to go.”

Squealing, she said, “Oh my gosh, Jason please! Can we?!”

Jason pressed a small kiss to her nose, “Of course, silly. It’s why I asked.”

“I’ve been asking Andrew but he….” she trails off, and her eyes become squinty, “heeey, did he tell you?”

“Mayb-” She jumped suddenly at the feeling of her phone vibrating in her back pocket. The Simpsons theme song blaring through the quiet kitchen, and letting her know her brother was calling. Most likely to tell her it was time to come home.

“I’ll go get your stuff,” Jason mumbled, separating himself with a wistful look in his eye.

Y/n mumbled a ‘thank you’ and fished her phone out of her back pocket, pressing the green call button and holding it up to her ear.

“Hey, lover girl. Mom says it’s time to come home. See ya,” and he hangs up before y/n can even respond.

Rolling her eyes, y/n heads upstairs to help Jason pack her stuff with all her troubles plaguing her heart like weeds.

* * *

Y/n had eased up a little on her avid studying habits because the SAT had passed, and she studied hard enough that she wasn’t planning on re-taking the exam-- no matter the score. In addition to that, there was enough to place on her shelf to make her look… well, better than good. Years worth of community service work, volunteering, participating in and starting clubs, all about to finally pay off. It was surreal. Kinda stressful, too, but now that she had time off she wanted to decompress. Enjoy herself some.

To begin with, much of it was taking time off with herself. Meaning, no Jason, or Andrew, or her parents. Just her. She didn’t even have to explain to Jason that she wanted to be alone because after her initial comment of taking time off alone, he’d kissed her palm and murmured about how proud he was against her skin. No bitterness or spite attached. He’d even made a joke about ‘bro time with Andrew’.

The gym nearest to her house was offering a free month trial-- which just so happened to be the amount of time she was planning on taking to relax before starting to study for finals again-- and she took it up instantly when she found out that they offered yoga and guided meditation classes. It was most likely the best thing she’d ever done.

Apart from getting an hour of physical exercise a day (because yoga is harder than it looks) she was the most relaxed ever. Her sleep was the best it’s been in so long, and her body felt so light. Time to reflect, she’d decided, was very important.

Plus, her self-esteem had gone up knowing she was doing something to better herself for* herself.

For the most part, that was how most of her days went.

Go to school, sometimes she’d eat lunch with Jason, get a ride home from him (the goodbye kisses ignited her), head to the gym, come back home and fall right asleep. She took advantage of the first three periods to finish any work that she had to turn in.

It’s only logical that she’d be nervous the day of her date with Jason, since it hadn’t been on her mind at all, and she hadn’t been spending time with the boy so his presence has not consoled her. An anxious fervor had plotted itself in the depths of her belly, goading her like a devil on her shoulder. Better watch how you act, it said, or you’ll fuck this all up.

Jason was the same way.

The poor boy had also taken to working out to release his...stress. Sleepless nights were spent with the weight-rack in his father’s home gym- arms aching from the strain of bench pressing. Shirtless torso draped in a sheen of sweat, flushed a pink color and littered with prominent veins as he pulled his body upwards, jaw clenched and mind focused, having already reached the point where he listens to his body’s begs for mercy. Rhythmic release of tense breaths escaped through the hard line of his lips, muscles defined under a glint of perspiration beneath the lights of the room, shorts low on his hips. His curls dripped salty beads down the line of his nose, and matted on his forehead.

He lost himself in the repetitive movements, body going numb until his brain turned off.

It was almost better than sex. Hell he did it to forget about sex.

He swears his body chose to betray him every time he was getting ready to fall asleep, projecting filthy images of a girl so sweet, he felt guilty just humoring them. Swollen red lips, hot mouths, soft hands, perky breasts blotchy with his marks. These pictures were so explicit and vivid in his brain about y/n, who was nothing but sweet and kind, and had never come close to even insinuating the things he imagined.

Hell on earth-- torture is what it felt like, having to ignore sticking a hand down his pants and pulling at himself until he found relief with such an innocent girl on his mind. It made him feel icky and gross because she was so pure. Jason preferred to turn to exhaustion of his body rather than pleasure. And, more often that not he greeted his father’s gym with a scowl and determination to distract himself, pushing himself until he was nothing but a breathless, strained heap laying all tired-out on the bench, salty beads running a path down his forehead and dripping down his neck where his shoulders drooped-- defeated.

Waking up the next day was a burning adventure; muscles feeling as if they’d been shot through and pricked with needles over and over again.

But, his dignity was still intact and he was able to look y/n in the eyes with no remorse. The one time he’d jerked off to her, he was a sweating, burning mess as he made his way up to her in the halls.

He’d learned his lesson then.

His nerves didn’t run as deep as y/n’s, but he did second guess himself the more intricate his plan got. Take a certain route, be there at a certain time so there wouldn’t be so full, alert the personnel of his presence.

Jason had approached his mother, Anne, the night that she had come home, and questioned her about her friend’s sister that worked as a zookeeper, to see if she had connections to the aquarium. Turns out, she did and-and,

“Honey, what’s the sudden interest in Penny’s sister?” She looked up at her son while chopping green onions.

Stammering, he rubbed his neck and said, “I was kinda… wondering- maybe, uhm… you could call in a favor for-for me…”

“What for?”

“I wanted to ask… y/n to prom at the uhm.. The aquarium,” his cheeks go pink and he can’t keep steady eye-contact with his mother. She’s smiling at him knowingly, smiling at him from underneath the lip of the wine-glass she holds up to her mouth.

She smacks her lip, “Y/n? The prom? When did this happen?” Anne smirked at him, scraping the onions off the cutting board with a knife onto the pan.

This would be the moment where the distraught teenage boy goes off on his mom for being absent and not knowing a single thing about him. Slam his firsts against the counter-top while sneering.

But Jason loved his mother and they maintained good communication, so there would be none of that. “Start of February…” He bites his thumb.

The sound of sizzling onions is what fills in the silence of their gazes. His mother slowly nodded her head, and Jason blushing.

“I knew it.”

Jason furrowed his eyebrows at his mother’s statement. “What?”

“I knew this would happen. I knew it the day she first came in with Andrew. The instant you said her name, I knew.”

Jason furrowed his eyebrows at his mother’s statement. “What?”

“I knew this would happen. I knew it the day she first came in with Andrew. The instant you said her name, and that look in your eye…” She gleamed at her son. “You love her, don’t you?”

The boy gaped at his mother. Had he really been that transparent from the beginning? So much so that not even he had noticed his feelings? “You knew?”

“Course I did. Pushed you out of me didn’t I? Know you like the back of my hand.” His mother set the glass down and continued cutting vegetables. “It’s a mother’s instinct to know when her boy has been swept off his feet.” A soft pat on the cheek meets a dazed Jason. “Now, what’s this favor you wanted?”

* * *

Y/n was scared to admit how deep her feelings were for Jason.

Scared to admit that the usual fluttering gnaw at her ribs had developed into an inferno that took over her entire body, centering at her heart and spreading through her nervous system, leaving her skin a tingling network of her emotions.

Basically, take puppy love, and remove ‘puppy’. She loved him. With her entire being and more she loved him. She could see her life with him more secure than anything in her life, which was a big admission because the poor girl was all about security. And Jason made her feel more comfortable than anything in her life at that moment; he made her forget about anything that wasn’t them together in that moment.

The morning of their date was like one of those scenes in movies where the character just has that really big realization, and all her feelings hit her at once. Y/n pieced it all together in a few seconds. How much he meant to her, how she loved him* and how scary it would be if she were to admit her feelings and receive nothing in return.

It was at cause of these thoughts that her nerves revved up to their max, mind overthinking different ways that her feelings might cause this date to go wrong. Like something might slip from her lips; a rushed, urgent proclamation of her devotion full of jumbled stutters and met with a stunned look and a freshly single boyfriend.

“Honey, Jason’s here!” Called her mother at the base of the stairs.

Y/n watched herself grow pale in her reflection, teeth sinking in her bottom lip. No turning back now.

“Coming!” She took one last look at herself, pulling on the sleeves of the cardigan she layered over the long, white-eyelet dress she was saving for an occasion like this. It was a light, summer material with white embroidered flowers and a nice frilly detain around the waist. The creme cardigan served no purpose other than the fact that she was nervous, and covering up calmed her down. There wasn’t much to cover, but bare shoulders made her heart want to start a riot, screaming at her that people were looking and it was time to get anxious about whether she looked good or not.

She forced herself to tear her eyes away from the dewy makeup on her face, drawing her mind away from picking at it until it was perfect because it would never be that and it’s okay. Instead, she focused on what lay ahead of her for the day— and maybe that was a tad bit worse but that didn’t matter because she was already in the witch’s pot and the brew was boiling— her date with Jason looming with possibility. Not to mention, she’d finally be getting to see the newly added exhibits she was longing to see.

Cute baby sea lions, penguins and jellyfish that quickly outweighed all the disastrous scenarios filling her mind.

Skipping down the steps with an eager smile on her lips, y/n struggled to hold in all her happy squeaks because downstairs Jason was waiting for her and-

“There she is!” Her mother greeted her at the base of the stairs, and winked at her daughter with a smile, a cheeky expression displayed upon the fact that what was happening was a surprising event. Her little y/n going out on a date with none other than her favorite out of Andrew’s friends, Jason.

This would have been the moment in the movies where everything freezes and everyone else disappears. The camera comes to a zoom in on Jason and y/n’s faces, the screen split in half but it the same, dreamy, loved-up expression on both their faces. Y/n’s cheeks warmed with a soft flush and a cheek splitting grin on her mouth, lips that shined with the gloss she had put on them, and eyes that shined under the kitchen lights with an extra sparkle that had floated up from her chest that had become the cavern where she shoved all her emotions.

Jason is equally stunned, unsure of how his girlfriend could get any more beautiful. Bunny teeth on full display, hands in the pockets of his blue jeans. He wore a satin bomber jacket with a tiger on the lower right side of his abdomen that was perched on snow-capped mountains that stretched up to his chest, a swooping eagle on his left breast. Two buttons were left unclasped, the collar of a white under-shirt peeking out, and the dip of his breast-bone on display, highlighted by the glint of the golden cross necklace his grandmother had given him when he was eight.

Meanwhile he took in the sight of her, y/n did the same as well, eyes roaming all over his figure and settling on the eyes that were already set on hers. He loved how she turned a pretty bothered color when they locked dreamy gazes. How her demeanor changes to shy glances when he smiles at her all toothy- his dimples prominent on his cheeks. The boy straightened, looking proud to be able to take her on a date.

“Well are you guys gonna stare at each other all day, or go to the aquarium?” Andrew asked. He was standing at the kitchen entrance, a bag of Cheetos in his arm, and one cheek bulging with chips.

“Andrew!” His mother playfully swatted his bicep. “Be nice! You’ll be the same, just wait.”

“Ready to go?” Jason asked, giving a sluggish nod towards the door, his being still transfixed in y/n, who nodded equally as slow even though her heart raced a mile a minute. “Alright, let’s go then. I’ll bring her home before 10, Mrs. Y/L/N.” Y/n walked towards the hand that Jason stretched out for her to grab, her hand swimming in his. It suddenly made sense why he was able to launch a football 400 meters. His hands were big, with a wide palm and nimble fingers that wrapped around hers, the top of it striped with the pleasing ridged of his veins.

“Bye, hunnies! Have fun…. But not too much fun!” The mother clutched at her chest, her eyes soft at the sight of Jason opening the door for her daughter.

“Ew, mom!” Andrew said, crumbling the bag to a close and retreating up the stairs, presumably to his room. He stopped at the base, and turned to say, “And I’ll be here, the brother forgotten by this best friend, woe is me!”

His friend twisted around with a hand on the doorknob, “You know I love you, babe!”

Andrew said something stupid along the lines of ‘show me, ya stud!’ before his mother shushed him up and waved at the couple that it was okay to leave, approaching the doorway to lock up.

Y/n peeked sideways at Jason, finding him already looking at her with a cheeky smirk.

“Caughtcha looking,” He said, taking hold of her hand again and giving it a mall squeeze, leaning over to peck her cheek. “Missed you, y/n.”

She wanted to stop and pull him in by both sides of his face to smash their lips together, but she knew that her mom was probably watching through the window. “Wanna kiss you good so bad, but my mom’s probably watching through the window and I don’t wanna hear about it later.”

“It’s okay, baby, I know. Wanted to ravish you when I saw you coming down the stairs, but that’s not the most appropriate thing to do when my girlfriend’s mom is present, is it?” They reached his car, and he sped up slightly to open the door for her, placing a hand on the small of her back. The grip on her phone increased at the sudden warmth on her body, her mind jumping to dirty assumptions on where this could lead to.

She got in the car with a quiver in her belly, and it jolted away when Jason shut the door behind her. What was she thinking? Their relationship was built upon glances and sly touches, and how she was flustered in a non-sexual way over him? Strongly?

“Did you wanna get food anywhere before?” He said when he opened the door to his side, leg hiking up and to the side to take a seat. “Dunno ‘bout you, but I’m really really craving those chicken-avocado paninis from that one little coffee shop, and I know you really like their milk tea, what do you say?”

“I say that’s a really good idea.” Y/n said, nodding with a pinch on one side of her face, her true feeling hidden. Eyes trained at the way he held the steering wheel; one hand at 12 while he turned the key into the ignition. Maybe he would hold her neck while the other rubbed at her…

What the fuck? She needs to cut it out.

Clearing her throat and looking out the window she said, “I could definitely go for a milk tea right now…”

“Yeah? Are you excited for today?” He twists to check behind him before pulling out of his parallel position to the curb, and y/n uses that moment to glance at the smooth skin of his neck, imagining how it would feel underneath her fingertips… her mouth…

“Yes,” She chokes, saliva collecting at the back of her tongue and slipping through. There’s a small pause where she coughs, and Jason plucks a bottle of water from the glove compartment, the back of his hand grazing her knees and the tops of her thighs, which only makes her cough harder.

“Are you okay, my love? Here,” using the flat of his wrist to take hold on the steering wheel while he opened the bottle, “drink some. I don’t want you to die before you’ve seen the jellyfish.”

A feeble ‘thank you*’ left her lips before the water bottle occupied it. The liquid washed out anything that had agitated her, and she drank extra to fill the time for at least a few more seconds. She was terrified of doing something wrong.

The car was pulling up the parking lot of their local cafe when she placed the bottle in the cup holder between them. Jason didn’t have a clue what was going through her head, or the fact that he should be concerned because her thoughts had traveled to him fingering her while she made a mess of his seat. He was simply so grateful to be spending time with the girl who he loved.

Who he loved.

The boy had realized the extremities of his regards after his mother had spoken them aloud.

You love her don’t you?

Yes, yes he did. He had known that it was there. The guzzling, spritzy feeling he felt over his chest- like when a sip of a freshly opened can of Sprite goes down your throat- when he saw her, felt her touch, thought about her, had always been there. Always. It was there the day he bumped into her outside of the locker room, her tiny frame going unnoticed when he rounded the corner of the locker room where she was waiting for her brother because he was busy texting some girl, but the moment he heard a squeaky ‘oh, I’m so sorry!’, it was there.

In some aspects, Jason was a bit dense, and this was one of them. He didn’t act when he should’ve. Or at least recognized what was going on in that broad chest of his-- he doesn’t think he would’ve acted because Andrew wouldn’t have held back. They hadn’t developed such a strong bond to come to the understanding that they did (Jason had made a really bold statement about life long partners and Andrew had been too blown away to stay mad).

Jason loved y/n, and he always would; that was just facts.

“Wanna stay in here or go inside with me?” He asked her, taking the key out and placing a hand on the door.

She was lightning quick to say “With you!” a bashful look overcoming her when he looked at her all knowingly, like he could see right through her. “I’ll go with you so you don’t have to carry everything,” y/n blubbered in efforts to reclaim her dignity, and stepped out of the car.

He feigned being hurt, “Owie, that stung. Are you saying I’m not strong?” Jason followed after her, a playful pout in his lips, “Tell you what,” he placed an arm around her neck, tugging her close to him and putting his lips by her ear, “I can carry you and the food, at the same time.”

Tables with umbrellas were located at the front of the cafe, people sitting with their computers open or having a chat with friends. Some looked up, some didn’t, but the stares of those who did made y/n feel thousands of times shyer than what she felt.

The girl couldn’t help but squeeze the fabric of her sweater around herself, her thoughts getting the best of her, the feeling of his lips an enticing action that drove her mad…

He knew it too, chuckling to himself as he opened the door.

Inside, only a single person made up the line for ordering, and she was already in the process of giving the man her card to pay. Jason and y/n stood side by side, looking up at the menus as if they were thinking over their choices, but really just thinking about each other.

“Nex- Well, well, well.”

Y/n doesn’t think she had ever forgotten that voice. And hearing it ten, with Jason at her side, brought back the fear she hadn’t even begun to overcome. Her face went white, her lungs freezing, and her feet glued to the ground.

Shock, was the medical term for it.

When your body is submerged into temperatures it can’t handle, it goes through a series of procedures to attempt survival. It begins to slow down to conserve energy, shutting down to keep in heat, or await help. Hearts slow, lungs slow, and in extreme, abrupt situations, a person can faint.

At the appearance of Chris after nearly an entire year, y/n wanted to faint. She wished she had, that way she wouldn’t have to endure Jason’s confused glances, and Chris’s malicious, salacious smirk.

“Y/n, long time no see, baby.” He said, a piece of gum that he had hidden in his cheek appearing as he started to chew, leaning forward on the counter and giving Jason a once over. “Who’s that?”

Jason’s eyebrows furrowed at the audacity this guy had, calling his girl ‘baby’. Y/n wasn’t looking at him, she couldn’t- she wasn’t aware of what was happening anymore, retreated into deep parts of her brain- but had she, she would’ve seen a bone-chilling, intimidating look of dominance in his usually kind green eyes. “I’m her boyfriend, who are you?” He said, stepping forward so his thighs were flush with the edge of the counter. His body was pulled tight like the strings on a violin, one pluck away from releasing a disastrous melody.

Y/n’s eyes began to tear from not blinking them, her heart going from beating normal to beating so hard she could feel it in her fingertips, her stomach dropping like it had been ripped to her feet.

“Who am I?” Chris licked the inside of his cheek, and y/n gagged. Repulsed, her feet tripped over themselves in attempts to get to the trashcan by the pickup site. “There wasn't even anything in your mouth, babe! Guess that thing they say about muscle memory is true, huh?”

Jason didn’t pay attention to the last thing that he said because he ran over to hold his girlfriend’s hair, rubbing her back and whispering that ‘it’s okay, my love, take deep breaths’. Her body started to tremble when nothing came out, her eyes emitting actual tears now, feeling undeserving of Jason’s affection because of what she’d done.

“I’m so-rry,” she whispered, her face a splotchy, red color that made him panic on the inside at what could plague her. “Can we go?”

“Yeah,” He nodded quickly, no questions asked.”Yeah, let’s go.”

Y/n shot up then, practically running out of the store while Chris laughed a belly-clenching laugh that pushed her out further. Jason looked back at him once, anger on clear display because whatever the guy had done, it was bad if it made her this upset.

When he turned around, y/n’s figure was disappearing through the view of the store’s window, arms clutching herself as she ran to the parking lot. There were more stares than when they first arrived when he ran out after her with a call of her name.

“Y/n!” He turned the corner to see her yanking violently at his door handle, tears streaming continuously down her cheeks now. Her shoulder jerked back and pushed forward until her knuckles collided on the material of the car. She was hurting herself. “Hey!” He yelled, yanking her back and wrapping his arms around her torso to restrict her movements.

She thrashed for a few seconds, sobs leaving her until she went limp, which was when he let her go. His eyes were wide with concern, not being able to believe what had just happened.

“Dovie? Look at me, dovie,” With a curled finger, he gently encouraged her to look at him. Irritated, doe eyes blinked with... fear.

“Do you want me?” Were the words that left her mouth in a breathy tremble.

“I always want you,” Jason said, not hesitating to respond to her abrupt inquiry. His thick brown eyebrows were still knitted, however, and she knew that she owed him answers. As much as she couldn’t bring herself to give them up, y/n said,

“Would you want me even if I was used?” She shut her eyes tight, not being able to bear looking at him. It felt as if she were the one using him then, comforted by his presence, but lying to him as well.

He scoffed, head shaking. “Yes. Even then I’d still love you.” Jason’s composure remains the same,neither alarmed or shocked that he had let it ‘slip’ past his lips because he hadn’t. He loved her and he told her.

Y/n, on the other hand, burst into tears and dropped her head, her forehead on his chest, chanting a pathetic, “I don’t deserve you. I don’t deserve you.”

“Y/n, I need you to tell me what just happened,” He crooned into her ear, his lips kissing her head in attempts to show his affection to comfort her, “Let me help you.”

She shook her head, and the gold zipper of his sweater scratched her forehead when she did. “No. No, I’m sorry.” She looked up at him, her voice pleading, “I don’t want to ruin our date. Can I tell you after?” Jason looked at her with lips pressed into a firm line. “Please.” She begged.

“Not gonna ruin our date, dovie,” He kissed her right cheek, and her eyelid, the bridge of her nose, and nudged his forehead against hers, “Spent so much time waiting for you, that I’m not gonna let a silly thing break us apart. I’m willing to fight, y/n. I already have.” He fumbled behind her, unlocking the door and propping it open before he pressed a kiss to her lips. A deep press that conveyed everything he just said. I love you.

A shaky, relieved breath left her when they parted, her eyes still shut when he said, “Get in the car, my love,” with another, plushy kiss to her lips before he stepped back to see her get in the car. Her eyes opened slowly to see him smiling at her, no trace of anything strange in his eyes- like he had forgotten everything that happened in the past 10 minutes.

Y/n mumbled an ‘okay’ and got inside, putting on his seat belt as he closed the door and walked over to his side. She wondered if this was it, if this was her messing up and at the end of the day she would be crying into her pillow because he’d broken up with her. If e was just playing nice because that was just Jason, his MO.

Lost in her own thoughts, she didn’t notice that he had turned on the radio until he started singing along to it. An oldies station that he always had on if there wasn’t any music coming from his phone. It was in the middle of Prince’s Nothing Compares 2 U to which Jason didn’t hesitate to start singing.

“I went to the doctor’s and guess what he told me, guess what he told me,” he looked over at her while he was singing, a playful look in his eyes, and he shimmied his shoulders. It was a classic ‘sing to your girlfriend so she’ll never forget this song and always associate this song with you’ moment.

“He said girl you better try to have fun no matter what you do,” his singing voice was a direct reflection on his character, smooth like honey, but deep and slightly scratchy like the comfort of burning wood, “but he’s a fool.”

Just then, his voice gets a little louder, “Cause nothing compares to you.” He placed a hand on her knee, his lips forming an exaggerated ‘o’ shape on the ‘you’. Jason was clearly singing to her, his eyes flickering from the road to her as a sweet gesture to direct his words to her.

Y/n sniffled and laughed, using her finger to trace the veins on the back of Jason’s hands, looking up at him while he sang to her. She had the sudden urge to reiterate what he had confessed in the parking lot. How it swelled in her chest, and consumed her.

But she couldn’t. It was hard and she didn’t know why. Maybe it was because he didn’t know the whole truth about her. Instead she wrote it on his hand. Her caresses going from random to spelling out letters on his knuckles. He noticed this. How the movements were calculated now, and the singing stopped. Green eyes went from the road to her eyes, to the road to their hands.

I love you, too.

She wiped her hand over his when she finished, and didn’t dare look up at him, so she looked out the window but left her hand in his hold. He brought it up to his lips, and kissed her knuckles, rubbing his lips over them repeatedly.

* * *

Jason stepped out of the car, and took long, quick strides over to her door, y/n admiring how long and muscular his legs looked in his jeans. He pulled the door open, leaning back so the door could swing past his torso, but staying relatively close to the car, giving her just enough space to get out. Y/n didn’t think anything of it, until she stood, and was face to face with his face, her nose swamped with the toned down scent of fresh, spring scented body wash merged with the soft smell of his skin.

Given how close she was, she could see the lines on his cupid's bow where his skin color changed from a golden tint to the strawberry of his lips.

“Can you kiss me properly now, baby?” He said, voice low and raspy. Hands came to flatten on the hood of his Prius, caging her in so she was close to his torso. A blush formed from the way he stared at her mouth like he was starved.

“P-properly?” She muttered, her hands taking purchase on his hips, and smoothing up his sides, the material cool under her hands.

“Yeah,” He licked the inside of his cheek, his head tilting, “Like this.”

Jason pushed forward until her back hit the car, and their hips were flush, y/n’s hands stuck between them, but she maneuvered them to she could palm at his chest, her nails digging in like cat’s claws when his lips found their way together, pillowed between each other in a passionate embrace that warmed her to her toes.

“Mmph, baby ‘ya marking me with your fingers,” He spoke in a sotto voice, heavy breaths and wet noises of their smacking lips resonating through their ears.

It took everything in her not to moan, and she knew that if they kept going it would be inevitable, so she unclenched her hands with a reluctant squeak, and ducked her head into his neck. Breath hot on his neck, “I’m sorry.”

“No, no, no, no. I… uhm, I liked it, my love. You didn’t do anything wrong, don’t be shy.” He flexed his jaw, his eyes rolling at the back of his head at recalling the feeling of her hands- dainty and small, and sweet,, and god* it was just her*- clawing at his chest. Jason dipped forward, and kissed her neck. His lips staining her skin with scorching heat, the soft skin creating a magnetic force between them.

She moaned at that, her teeth scratching at his neck tentatively. “Stop it,” Her head felt floaty, her limbs soft, “Wanna see the fishies and the way that you’re…” “The way that I’m what, dovie?” He’s stunned by her moan, his brain haywire. “Tell me.”

“The way you’re talking is gonna me make me wanna stay here, and I really wanna see the fishies. Please?” She’s whining; voice an embarrassingly high pitched tone. Her hands gripped the collar of his sweater for stability because her knees were shaking.

“Alright. Alright, let’s go see the fishies, baby.” Jason pecks her one last time at the juncture of her neck, and takes a step back to grab her hand. “Come on.”

* * *

“So, they’ve got McDonald’s, Tam’s Burgers, Ruby’s Diner, and Sushi.” Jason holds a tri-fold directory of the aquarium in one hand, and y/n’s hand in the other.

“Sushi? At an aquarium?” She skews half her face to the side like she tasted something sour.

“I know right?” He copies her face, “The irony. Up for burgers? It’s all they’ve got.”

Y/n’s stomach grumbled at the mention of food, and she giggled when Jason noticed and laughed at her. “Burgers sound good,” she said, rubbing her stomach comically. Although she was still heated by their earlier interaction, both were pretending like nothing happened, and like they didn’t have a big thing waiting for them at the end of the day.

Like she wasn’t going to reveal how sh-

“Anything for you, baby.” Jason Jason held up the tri-fold again and blew out of his lips as he made out the route to Tam’s burgers.

When they both got there, they ordered the same thing: one cheeseburger with a vanilla milkshake. Oh, and they were sharing chili cheese fries.

It was the epitome of a perfect date for a young couple in love. They chose to sit on the same side of the booth because they were greedy to get everything they could from each other. Unnecessary touches were made more than the amount of things they said to each other. Him brushing hair behind her each, hand on her thigh, rubbing her cheeks, feeding her, wiping her mouth, her arm hooked through his, pecking his cheek after a sip of her milkshake, nudging his feet with hers, caressing his thigh. It was on the rubbing his thigh part where things would get slightly heated, and Jason would stop to kiss her, licking into her mouth to taste the vanilla that was also on his tongue.

Jason paid for their meal, much to y/n’s begging, and then walked her over to the penguin exhibit.

“Heard one of their eggs just hatched, and I want you to see it.” He said, swinging their hands between them.

“Really?” She asked, her features lifted with excitement. “Well then let’s go!” Y/n ran ahead of him, looking back at him and pulling at his arm. Laughing, they swerved around people and ran past the large tank that represented the reef ecosystem, blue light from the sun that streamed through the top of the tank dancing on their skin like shadows. It was a magical moment, even though they looked like weirdos. In their head they were in their own movie, their own world.

“Jason, honey? Is that you?” A woman in green cargo shorts and the customary blue shirts with the aquarium’s logo on the left breast called from the inside of the penguin expedition. She had raven black hair in a low bun, and red lipstick paired with a bright smile. She was feeding the animals from two buckets on the edge of the pool where they were jumping in.

“Hey, Janet!” Jason called out, waving from behind the glass barrier. “Long time no see, have you gotten younger?”

She laughed and turned around, walking through an archway and disappearing from view. A male walked out, and smiled towards the couple, nodding once and turned his attention towards the penguins. He whistled once, and they all came to him, huddling around him expectantly.

Then he bent downwards and placed the back of his hand on the penguins tummy, pressing back and they waddled backwards. He did the same to four others, pressing them so they were in a straight line, and they stayed where he placed them. Janet came out then, with black objects in her arms.

“What are they….” Y/n asked, confused as to what was going on because she had been to this aquarium several times and had never seen such things. “... doing?”

Janet removed one of the items from her chest, and y/n could see that they were large letters. A ‘P’ which she placed at the feet of the first penguin. ‘R’ on the one following. They rested against their bellies, and after an initial peck at it, they left it alone and watched their keepers expectantly, presumably for food. ‘O’ followed, then ‘M’. And as the question mark was being laid on the last penguin, Jason turned to watch his girlfriend’s face, waiting for the realization to hit. It didn’t take very long.

“Oh my gosh, Jason, look! Look it spells prom!” She pointed at it excitedly, a smile from ear to ear as she looked on at the animals, amused by their antics. She looked over at him to share her glee, and found him watching her with a dreamy smirk. “Look at the animals! Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Will you go to prom with me?”

Y/n’s jaw dropped, the full realization hitting her. This had been planned, more specifically, Jason had planned this. “You did this?” She asked. Looking back and then at him again as he nodded slowly, still waiting for an answer. She stood there for a moment, stunned, and after a blink she jumped into his arms. “Yes! Yes! Yes, I want to go to prom with you!”

He didn’t waste any time in wrapping his hands around her waist and twirling her around, laughing. Kissing her cheek, he set her to her feet and she was watching him with bleary eyes, a pout on her lips. “You did this for me?”

“Technically, my mom did, but yes. Had her call in for me. Did you like it?” He put his hands in the pocket of his bomber jacket, his lips puckered as he tried to conceal a proud smile.

“I love it, so much, Jason I-” She’s left speechless, and she glances up at the animals again, where Janet and the other keep were throwing fish at them. “Thank you.” The tips of her fingers came to cover her mouth, tears of joy threatening to slip.

“Don’t cry, dovie. You weren’t supposed to cry,” he cooed, slipping his hands out again to wipe at the tears that fell down her cheeks.

“Shut up and kiss me,” Leaning up on her tip-toes, y/n abruptly yanked at his jacket, and crushed their lips together.

“There we go! Your mother would love this!” Janet whooped, and her cheers caused the couple to split from each other with red faces, laughs covering their embarrassment.

“Hush up, and let me kiss my girl will ya?” Jason pointed a finger at her and pretended to scowl. “We’re leaving to somewhere where we can smooch in peace!” Nearby people laughed at his jokes.

“Bye, sweetie! Tell your mother I said hello!” She waved goodbye, and returned her attention to the penguins at her feet.

Y/n waved a goodbye along with Jason, yelling a ‘thank you’ as she walked away. Her brain was still trying to process what had happened when they turned the corner and walked into the new exhibit of the darker layers of the ocean. A long, winding hallway where the only light was the glow coming from the bio-luminescence animals in the water.

An influx of serotonin swimming through her veins, squeals leaving her where she noticed where they were.

“The jellyfish!” She left Jason’s side to stand in front of the large glass. An abundant amount of jellyfish bobbed up and around each other at slow, hypnotizing speeds. Glowing, long tentacles swaying in their trail; networks of veiny light streams present in each of them. The blue hue reflecting off of her skin, and onto the pane where it showed her amazed reflection.

“They’re beautiful,” she mumbled. Jason caught up, and stood besides her, his figure also appearing on the glass pane that held the jellyfish. “I could watch them all day.”

His eyes drifted from the jellyfish to her side profile, admiring how ethereal she looked in that moment. Her face was soft with curiosity and wonder. “Me too.”

“You’re not even looking at them.” She gives him a side-eye glance.

“I know.” He turned so his feet pointed to her, and combed his hair back because a few curls were tickling his forehead. “Can’t believe I’m gonna have the prettiest girl as my prom date.”

Y/n’s nostrils flared and she sucked in her lips to suppress a smile. “Stop it.”

“S’true. Everyone’s gonna be so jealous of me.” He sucked in a breath, “Gonna have to hold on to you so no one steals you from me.”

She knows he means every word that leaves his lips. And that the words are meant to tickle her heart with their honesty. While they do so, they also break it. Y/n thinks she’s living a lie. Not her relationship with him, but the way she acts and portrays herself. So much of herself, she kept hidden. It hurt knowing that he was being so genuine, and she wasn’t. It hurt more than knowing he could break up with her if he knew the truth.

So, she decided to come clean. Even though they decided on the end of the day, her conscience wasn’t letting her live.

“Jason, I have something to tell you.” She said, her throat closing up on the second syllable of his name, and crying by the end of her sentence.

The boy brings his palm to her lower back, and moves his thumb up and down comfortingly. “Deep breaths, y/n. I’m listening.”

“That boy?” She tilts her chin so she’s looking at him, and he nods when they make eye contact. “From the cafe? I knew him from a party.” Deep breath. “We were playing truth or-” a sob leaves her, shoulders sagging as her composure breaks.

Jason raises his hand from her back to her shoulder, and steps closer so she’s pressed against his chest. “It’s okay. I’m right here, baby. I’m not leaving you. Take your time.”

It would’ve been a lot more embarrassing if people were passing, but they were the only ones there. Had there been someone, they would’ve seen a terribly emotional y/n and a very concerned Jason.

A creeping feel of panic like the one from that night teased her toes, anxiety of her confession crawling up her spine. But she had to push through. She needed to get this off her chest.

“We were playing truth or dare, and… and I got dared t-to suck him off in front of everyone else,” another hiccup interrupts her words, and she had to stop to take a deep breath like Jason said, giving him an ashamed, fleeting glance. Not long enough to see that his eyes were wide with astonishment, eyebrows furrowed with bubbling rage.

“What?” He said, more on the rhetorical side to encourage her to keep talking. His mind kept jumping back to the guy at the cafe and the way he said ‘there wasn’t anything in your mouth, babe’ with a knowing look in his eyes. How he practically violated her with his eyes. Rage filled him; all he wanted to do was punch the guy in the face.

Anger made itself present in his stunned comment, and y/n took it as a disgusted comment. She jumped to explain herself, “I didn’t want to do it! I swear I didn’t put they started calling me names, a-and I didn’t want them to be upset with me so I-” another collapse of her words, chest rising and falling with desperate breaths. The panis increased, rising up to her chest and gripping like a boa.

Jason knew that she needed reassurance on that moment and said, “Sh, sh Dovie, deep breaths. It’s alright, I know you didn’t, my dove. That’s called peer pressure.”

It was clear that this was something she struggled with for a long time, and it hurt him so much inside that he had so blindly lived in the presence of her pain. Held her, touched her, and never noticed that she was so deeply in pain. The anger in him became a mix of bitter remorse at the fact that he had done nothing to push at her, or present himself in a way that showed she could trust him. He was unaware he was crying too until his own vision became blurry with moisture.

“I left right after he… after he…. Because the other boys started touching me, too. That was when you found me under that tree. Remember?” Shiny doe eyes glimmered with the light that came off the jellyfish at him. They seemed to beg him for forgiveness, for understanding that she was sorry.

“Yes, sweetheart I remember.” Soft fingers crawl up her cheek, caressing like silk at the tears that still fell. Kisses were littered in her temple with strong pressure, a display of his comfort. “Oh, I’m so sorry that you had to go through that, baby. It’s not your fault.”

“I should have said no. I should’ve l-left or something…”

“No. No, y/n this wasn’t your fault. This wasn’t on you. You were under pressure, and they were bullying you as well… Oh my god, baby, this- You don’t want to tell authorities?”

“No! No, no, Jason I can’t l-let anyone find out I did…” Her eyes shut with distaste, “That. Please, don’t tell anyone.”

“Yeah, yeah, okay.” He nods.

“Do you still want me?” Her cross, and her nails dig into her arms. Y/n bowed her head and sniffled. Jason took note of this, and pried her hands off so she wouldn’t bleed. His heart clenched at the tone of desperation in her voice. It hurt him to even think that he’d leave her so easily, and his words came out more emotionally tainted than he would’ve wanted.

“Y/n look at me.” His hand cupped her cheek, and the other held both of her wrists. She wrapped her hands around his wrists and squeezed him tightly. “I’m not leaving you. Can’t you understand that I love you, baby? I’m not leaving you, not now.”

“God, Jason. I don’t deserve you.” Y/n leans into his touch, sniffling.

“No, dovie. You’ve got that all twisted. It’s me who doesn’t deserve you. You’re so good to me, so kind, and sweet,and I’m so so sorry thing happened to you. But it’s gonna be okay, yeah? We can work through this, I’ll be there by our side. I won’t leave.” The boy followed after her eyes, wanting to maintain eye contact with her, but she was shifty with her gaze. He wanted to be able for her to see-- in his eyes-- that he meant every word.

“I love you.” Y/n jumped into his chest and wrapped her hands around his neck, happy to be free of guilt, and blissfully happy that she had Jason. That he loved her, and she was able to tell him that she loved him.

After a moment of just standing in each other’s arms, head’s buried in each other’s neck with Jason muttering into her ear just how much she meant to him, they stepped back to look at the other, and y/n laughed halfheartedly, wiping at her eyes and underneath her nose. Quiet ‘thank you’s were exchanged and they took one last good look at the jellyfish in silence. Y/n suggested they go home, and Jason said he wanted to stop by the gift shop first. Something about how how he needed a polar bear to hold onto at night.

In reality, he bought her the sea otter she wouldn’t stop petting, and a key chain with the date engraved on it. He didn’t give these to her until they were in front of her house, and he reached into the bag behind her seat.

“These are for you.” He said, placing the stuffy on her lap, and the key chain on her open palm. “A memoir. The first time we said I love you... among other things.”

His tone was serious, mouth set in a grim line, but y/n was smiling.

“I knew something was up when you told me to wait outside. Thank you.” Leaning over the console, they both met each other halfway, and kissed each other goodbye. At the first taste of her lips, he removed his hands from the steering wheel in favor of having them on her face, holding her too him a few seconds longer than she usually would have let herself stay kissing.

“You’re welcome, dovie. I love you.” He said, pecking her lips once more, and then her nose, making her laugh through her nose. “I’ll see you tomorrow, but I’ll call you tonight. Yeah?”

“Yeah. I love you, too.” She opened the door, and waved once more at her boyfriend who smiled at her from inside the car.

Y/n was slightly upset over he fact that he hadn’t gotten out to walk her up the steps, and in any other situation, he would’ve. But out of his eagerness, Jason waited until she was inside, and lifted his hips to get his phone out of his pocket, calling the one person he knew would have his back if he wanted to set things straight.

It rang three times before he picked up.

“Andrew. It’s an emergency. Come over to my house tonight. Don’t let anyone see you leave.”

#IM SUCH A SOFTIE FOR JASON IM SORRY #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fic #harry styles one shot #harry styles smut #harry styles blurbs #harry styles fluff #harry styles fluff oneshot #fratboy harry styles

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irishpotato19 · 3 years

Note

what pets do you think the team would have

Oh my gosh, this was so cute! I might die if someone doesn’t draw these. Just kidding lol. But, they have so much potential to be super cute drawings. Anyways I hope you enjoy them. :)

BF5 Headcanons: With pets

Agura Ibaden -

I could totally see her with a snake

but a little one

She would keep a tank/terrarium in her room

sometimes it would sneak along for rides or missions

likes to curl around her arm and fingers

AJ Dalton -

a golden retriever

It just totally fits his personality

Would totally be best friends with it

Lots of tummy rubs, and long walks/runs...tries to teach it to sled or snowboard

would name it something snow related or sports related

Sherman Cortez -

Originally I thought a dog, but then I thought maybe a Chinchilla

I just think it would be adorable

Lets it sit on his shoulder or run around in its ball while he works

Feeds it a LOT, and takes care of it like its his baby

Has little toys for it, and a huge cage in his room

Spinner Cortez -

a cat, maybe a tabby or calico

It likes to sit on the game console, or play with controllers

Spinner got his cat its own controller so it can play with him

Lets his cat eat leftovers, even though Sherman scolds him for it

Has little video game and pizza themed toys for it

Stanford Issac Rhodes -

a horse, maybe a brown Clydesdale or Cleveland Bay

It would obviously stay back in Britain, but he loves visiting just to see his horse

Probably names it Bodiam, Brocade, Alnwick, or Hylton...something royal sounding

Likes braiding it’s hair, or just talking to it...it always listens or whinys its approval/disapproval -at least Stanford thinks so-

Is actually a really great rider, and insists the team comes some time so he can show them

Tezz Volitov -

a black cat, and probably names it a russian or sentient themed name

It will sit on his lap, or just laze about his work area

Very tame, and relaxed...Spinner jokes and says it’s Tezz’s twin

Takes extra good care of it; food, toys, cat tree, etc.

Likes to talk and tell stories to his cat, and feels comforted around it

Vert Wheeler -

a dog, and it is super well behaved, and acts so much like Vert

It’s his best friend and he takes it everywhere when he’s not in a battle

It will bring him tools when he works on the Saber, or eat the scraps of food left over

His dog likes to sleep on his lap, and chew on his shoes

He likes to buy it little collars, and special hats to match him

Zoom Takazumi -

a dog or dwarf hamster

It would be very energetic and follow him everywhere

If it’s a dog he’d play frisbee and catch, and go on extra long walks...if its a hamster he’d let it crawl around in his hand, or let it roll around in a hamster ball

Literally has the cutest relationship with it, and likes to spoil it

I’m sure he’d name it something from back home, and talk to it about his insecurities

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cardest · 4 years

Text

Sydney playlist

And the winner is Si-da-nee! Sydney, Newcastle, Canberra, NSW...ah! The music from this part of the world is so good it is to be believed. I shared Melbourne yesterday and today (on Australia Day) I just had to go with one more. I know this Sydney playlist can reach 200 songs. It’s up to you! Let me know what bands or songs I missed. The songs branch out to Newcastle, Byron Bay, Broken Hill and down to Canberra and the Snowy Mountains.

SYDNEY

001 Icehouse - Harbour Town 002 Hard-Ons & Henry Rollins - let there be rock 003 Paul Kelly and the Messengers - Sydney From A 727 004 Cruel Sea - 4 005 Toe To Toe - Race Against Time 006 GANGgajang - Sounds Of Then (This Is Australia) 007 Celibate Rifles - Wild Desire 008 Johnny Cash - Fast Boat to Sydney 009 The Kinks - Australia 010 Rose Tattoo - Out of This Place 011 BB and the Blips - Lucky Country 012 Cold Chisel - Painted Doll 013 Mass Appeal - Inward Span 014 Mortal Sin - Women In Leather 015 HIEROPHANTS - Nervous Tic 016 Dragon - Blacktown Boogie 017 Mental as Anything - Blacktown To Bondi 018 The Scientists - Hey Sydney 019 Pat Wilson - Bop Girl 020 The Mexican Spitfires - Sydney Town 021 Arrowhead - Coven of the Snake 022 Models - Two Cabs To The Toucan 023 Box The Jesuit - Sleazo Peepshow 024 AC/DC - Live Wire 025 Redgum - Parramatta Gaol 1843 026 Frenzal Rhomb - My City Of Sydney 027 Parramatta Hot Rod Man - The Satelite V 028 Radio Birdman - Murder City Nights 029 Bane of Isildur - Gates of Valhalla 030 Clouds - Bower Of Bliss 031 Lime Spiders - my favorite room 032 The Beasts of Bourbon - I’m So Happy I Could Cry 033 You Am I - High Chair 034 Louis Tillet - Carousel 035 Nic Dalton and his Gloomchasers - Okay Sydney You Beat me 036 The Saints - One Way Street 037 The Whitlams - You Gotta Love this City 038 The Executives - Summer Hill Road 039 Ratcat - That Ain't Bad 040 Hoodoo Gurus - Leilani 041 Straight Arrows - 21st Century 042 Falling Joys - Parachute 043 Toys Went Berserk - Wheels In Motion 044 The Hummingbirds - If A Vow 045 The Angels - Wasted Sleepless Nights Dark Room 046 Died Pretty - Stone age Cinderella 047 Sadistik Exekution - Mental Derailment 048 Newtown Jets team song 049 Do Re Mi - Man Overboard 050 INXS - The Loved One 051 John Kennedy - Ghost of Newtown 052 Nazxul - Vow of Vengeance 053 The Go-Betweens - Streets of your town 054 SPY V SPY - ONE OF A KIND 055 Tumbleweed - Gyroscope 056 Kylie Minogue - Wouldnt Change A Thing 057 Mental As Anything - Live It Up 058 Divinyls - Good Die Young 059 Grungeon - Infernal Shelter 060 Hard-Ons - School Days 061 The Radiators - No Tragedy 062 The New Christs - Born Out Of Time 063 The Sunnyboys - Alone With You 064 The Triffids - A Trick Of The Light 065 The Takeaways - Sweet & Sour 066 COG - Bondi 067 Cold Chisel - Tomorrow 068 Icehouse - Electric Blue 069 Midnight Oil - Bring On The Change 070 Celibate Rifles - Darlinghurst Confidential 071 Radio Birdman - Do The Pop 072 You Am I - Coprolalia 073 Cruciform - Sanctuary 074 Electric Pandas - Big Girls 075 The Saints - Just like fire would 076 Perry Keyes - The Day John Sattler Broke His Jaw Douly Stewart 077 The Bushwackers Band - Shores Of Botany Bay (double Douly Stewart action!!) 078 The Holy Soul - Family Magician 079 Mi Sex - Only Thinking 080 Beasts of Bourbon - Chase the dragon 081 Paul Kelly and His Messengers - Incident On South Dowling 082 Models - Out of Mind Out of Sight 083 Clouds - Alchemy’s Dead 084 The Go-Betweens - Lavender 085 Def FX - Surfers of the Mind 086 Skyhooks - Somewhere in Sydney 087 The Bamboos - Kings Cross 088 The Whitlams - Year Of The Rat 089 MINDSNARE - BURNING BLACK 090 David Bowie - Let's Dance ( Sean Steward ) 091 V Spy V Spy - Harrys Reasons 092 Hoodoo Gurus - Whats My Scene 093 Midnight Oil - Who Can Stand in the Way 094 Hard-Ons - Girl In The Sweater 095 Goanna - Solid Rock 096 THY ART IS MURDER - Human Target 097 White Dog - Sydney Limits 098 Tumbleweed - Hang Around ( Aje Morris ) 099 Mental As Anything - The Nips Are Getting Bigger 100 Icehouse - Great Southern Land 101 Divinyls - Only Lonely 102 Deborah Conway - Its Only The Beginning 103 Bastardizer - Up The Ante 104 Mi Sex - Computer Games 105 Sunnyboys - You Need A Friend 106 AC/DC - Heatseeker 107 Mortality - D. Form 108 INXS - Don’t Change 109 Naiad - Confidence 110 Crow - Railhead 111 Mass Burial - Etemmu 112 New Groove - Rockmelons 113 The Alarm - New South Wales 114 Potion - Women of the Wand 115 Backyard Mortuary - Lure of the Occult 116 Girl Overboard - The Love We Make 117 Radio Freedom - I Can Feel It 118 Tex Perkins & Don Walker - Harry Was A Bad Bugger 119 Dragon - This Time 120 Slaughter Lord - Destructor 121 Alchemist - Dancing To Life 122 Happy Hate Me Nots - Salt Sour & Brighton 123 Downtime - Downtime 124 50 lions - To the test 125 Town Pants - New South Wales 126 INSURGE - Political Prisoners 127 GANGgajang - Gimme Some Loving 128 The Maviss - Thunder 129 MAD MAX 2 SOUNDTRACK - The Montage Main Title from the Road 130 Cruel Sea - This Is Not The Way Home 131 Mortal Sin - I Am Immortal 132 Mad Max /Furry Road OST - Doof warrior 133 WHISKY SMILE - Old Mate Ernie Dingo’s Got My Baby 134 Falling Joys - Jennifer 135 Noiseworks - Burning Feeling 136 The Celibate Rifles - Tick Tock 137 Lime Spiders - scene of the crime 138 Died Pretty - out of the unknown 139 The Crystal Set - a drop in the ocean 140 Kings Of The Sun - DROP THE GUN 141 Frozen Doberman - Dying Phase 142 Laura Imbruglia - Looking For a Rabbit 143 Scarymother - Lord of the Flies 144 Captain Cleanoff - Wizards Sleeve 145 Wa Wa Nee - Stimulation 146 Gods of Eden - From the End of Heaven 147 Rabbit - Too Much Rock N Roll 148 Balescream - Amnesia 149 Aeturnus Dominion - Aeturnus Dominion 150 The Screaming Jets - October Grey 151 Bob Hudson - The Newcastle song 152 The Poor Boys - Hey Man 153 Ilium - Orbiting a Sun of Sadness 154 The Seer - The Fall 155 Arse/Piss - Churdburglar 156 Alchemist - Austral Spectrum 157 Redgum - Yarralumba Wine 158 Henrys Anger - Personality Test 159 Sidewinder - Titanic Days 160 Armoured Angel - Enigmatize 161 Midnight Oil - Kosciusko 162 The Church - reptile 163 Cog - Charades 164 Kim Salmon & the Surrealists - Lightning scary 166 Addictive - Pity of Man 167 Ilimitable Dolor - Soil She Bears 168 AC/DC - The Jack 169 The Angels - We Gotta Get Out of This Place 170 Celibate Rifles - O Salvation 171 Happy Hate Me Nots - Things wearing thin 172 Jack Forest - Every hour god sends 173 Mi Sex - But you don't care 174 Laura Imbruglia - looking for a rabbit 175 Hummingbirds - Blush 176 INXS - Kiss The Dirt (Falling Down The Mountain) 177 Yes I'm Leaving - Slow release 178 Rose Tattoo - Rock n roll outlaw 179 Asteroid B12 - True romance 180 Midnight Oil - bus to Bondi 181 Feedtime - Motorbike girl 182 The Bhagavad Guitars - I wanna know why 183 The Scientists - Blood Red River 184 The Crystal Set - cluster 185 Beasts of Bourbon - Chase the dragon 222 Deniz Tek - Run out of water 333 AC/DC - Jailbreak 666 TINA TURNER - We Don’t Need Another Hero (ThunderDome)

We are so close to 200 songs! Jump in and let’s fill the gaps together. PS: I don’t use Spotify because they don’t even half half these songs on their system.

#sydney #sydney playlist #bands from sydney #sydney songs #newcastle playlist #mortal sin #ac dc #spy vs spy #mental as anything #sadistik exekution #beasts of bourbon #sunnyboys #armoured angel

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classic80sand90smovieloves2 · 5 years

Text

Meeting and Dating Steven Meeks

(Not my gif)(requested by a few lovely asks )

(Keeping up the au where the school isn’t just boys only)

- You met Steven when you needed a tutor. Stevens used to helping people with their homework and gets pretty good grades so when his teacher asks him to help another student he isn't really surprised.

- He is surprised when he shows up and sees you at the table, he doesn’t know what he should do or how he should introduce himself. He isn't good when it comes to female interaction so expect that hes going to be a little awkward.

- You end up spotting him and hes forced to approach and introduce himself. You think its a little cute how hes so shy and the little blush on his cheeks just adds to that.

- During your tutoring session he stumbles over his words especially when you lean in close to him to see what he’s doing.There’s a lot of throat clearing and pulling at collars.

- You meet with him a couple more times where you can easily tell he thinks you’re cute and that he definitely wont act on it so you take the initiative. So you leave your phone number in his textbook after one of your tutoring sessions.

- When he gets to his dorm room and opens his book he finds the little slip of paper and cant help but smile.

- He tells the guys about you and they force him to call you. They’re definitely beside him trying to tell him what to say and listening in on your conversation.

- For your first date he takes you to a museum. It’s most likely in winter or fall so the walk there is pretty cold. He keeps trying to warm up your hands and offers to give you his coat even though you have your own; he actually apologizes to you like he has some kind of control over the weather.

- Once you’ve gotten inside the museum you guys don’t want the date to end so when you’ve circled the museum a total of three times you finally agree to walk around town. He buys the two of you some hot chocolate and roasted nuts or something similar from a street vendor and the two of you sit in a park together.

- Your first kiss is at the end of the date; he takes your hands in his and leans down to kiss you as you stand on the steps of the school.

- It’s safe to say you guys are dating after that.

- As much as the school thinks that you two are cute together and that Steven is a nice guy nobody understands why you’re dating him or how your relationship came to be because even though he’s sweet, he’s kind of a loser (and also doesn’t seem to have much charm when it comes to girls).

- He goes to Charlie for dating advice whenever he’s at a loss. He rarely needs any nor does he ever actually use Charlie’s advice since he isn’t as good with the ladies as he likes to think and because Steven really is a romantic at heart (although he would rather die then have the boys find out).

- Basically all of the society were raised to be gentleman and Steven is definitely no different.

- Manners; he is so sweet and polite. Your parents can’t help but love him and neither can you.

- Has actually carried you across a muddy street so you don’t ruin your shoes and clothes.

- Hanging out on the roof of the school. He’s most likely surprised you at some point by setting up a picnic up there.

- Winking at each other in class, you definitely wink at him more especially when you catch him staring.

- Blowing him kisses whenever you see him and his friends aren’t looking.

- Slow makeout sessions; he’s a very soft kisser. It’s partly because of his glasses.

- He loves cuddling so much. You guys cuddle facing each other with his arms wrapped around your waist and your legs tangled together.

- Library and study dates

- Sweet lazy mornings when the two of you are able to get away from school (when you’re on break or visiting home, etc)

- Stealing his sweaters and playfully taking his glasses.

- Nose kisses.

- Dancing together, especially when you’re in a secluded area and he can get his radio to work.

- He kisses your hand/knuckles a lot; it’s basically a habit of his at this point.

- Reading over his shoulder in the study room, at lunch or on one of your more relaxing dates (a picnic or trip to the park; one where the two of you are more just enjoying each other’s company rather than interacting)

- Trying to count his freckles when he’s busy doing work.

- Listening to the radio with him.

- He tries to impress you with his intelligence; he thinks it’s one of the only things he’s got going for him.

- He’s probably finished your homework for you when he’s gotten really excited over something and is too impatient to wait for you to finish.

- His cheeks turn a glorious shade of pink when you compliment him.

- He gets flustered whenever he sees you, even months after dating he sometimes gets caught off guard by your beauty.

- He watches/stares at you a lot; he can’t help it, he just thinks you’re really pretty.

- Usually when you guys are in class, you’ll look over at him and he’ll already be looking at you.

- You probably like to play with his hair, he has no problems with it when no ones around.

- He loves when you wear his beanies, he thinks they look adorable on you.

- Soft kisses on your neck.

- He gets aroused when you rant about something you’re passionate about. You can tell he’s getting hot and bothered because he licks his lips a lot.

- He really likes intelligence so whenever you show your knowledge on a subject he cant help but get turned on.

- He’s pretty adventurous; he’s willing to try anything once so you guys go to a lot of weird places and try new things.

- Abrupt kisses.

- He’ll walk you to class or to your dorm and start to walk away before he turns back and gives you a goodbye kiss.

- Tight hugs where he buries his face in your hair.

- Probably writes you secret messages in Latin or just speaks Latin to impress you. He’ll sometimes say something to you in Latin and when you ask what it meant it’ll be something like “you’re beautiful”.

- Laying your head in his lap while he plays with your hair.

- Laughing as he makes up raps or puts a beat to an old poem.

- He kind of thinks it’s a miracle that you’re dating him especially since you were the one to try to initiate the relationship.

- Always notices when you change your hair or get your nails done.

“No, no I really like it! It looks great on you!”

- He lets you paint his nails but wants to take it off before he goes to class.

- He loves playing in the leaves and walking around when it’s fall time.

- You get a lot of flowers or pretty weeds, he picks them whenever you guys walk around campus. You’ll be walking across one of the fields and all of a sudden he’s not beside you, he’s five feet away picking a nice yellow dandelion to give to you.

- You usually end up with them in your hair or in your shirt pocket.

- For your birthday or Christmas/Hanukkah he bought you a gold necklace that has your name on it and a few real diamonds. It’s really expensive and you have trouble actually taking it but he says how it’s like a promise ring and your heart actually melts a little.

- You guys have to see each other everyday; you have such a puppy love type of relationship but at the same time you’re like an old married couple.

- Becoming good friends with Pitts and Dalton, well you become good friends with nearly the entire society but especially those two.

- Going on double dates with Todd and Neil (yes I went there)

- You guys go out late at night and walk around the town going into different random stores; just enjoying the time spent alone and away from the stresses of Hellton.

- His parents really like you, they think you’re wonderful and bring out the best in him.

- He asks if you’re willing to have a long distance relationship before he applies to college as if you’d ever stop him from pursuing his dreams.

- Going off to a prestigious college with him or trying to get into a college that’s close to his.

- You guys get an apartment together and a bunch of fish. He prefers to get fish because you guys don’t have the time to take care of a cat or dog.

- You have a really bright future with him and everyone can see it.

#80s movies #80s imagine #80s movie #80s movie imagine #80s imagines #80s movie headcanon #80s movie headcanons #dead poets society x reader #dating dead poets society #dead poets society #dead poets society headcanon #dead poets society headcanons #dead poets society imagine #steven meeks #steven meeks x reader #steven meeks headcanon #steven meeks headcanons #steven meeks imagine

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katiecomma · 5 years

Text

Tag Game

I was tagged by @deltajackdalton - thank you dahling!

(Answer 20 questions then tag 20 followers)

Name: Katie

Nickname: Katie

Zodiac: Libra like my girl @lavendersblues

Languages: English - I took 9 years of French, but the teachers were all so disconnected from year to year that I didn’t retain much beyond numbers and some basic words. I also did some Duolingo for Italian for a while, but chose to focus my time on other things *ahem* writing fanfiction *ahem*

Nationality: Canadian

Favorite season: fall - though I feel this is selfish because my birthday is in the fall.

Favorite flower: I’m not a fan of flowers, so I don’t have a favourite. Maybe Orchids because biologically they are fascinating. There’s this one that tricks bees inside and then literally tags them with the pollen before they let the bee out a little trapdoor. It’s insane!

Favorite scents: wood smoke, pine trees

Favorite fictional character: Jack Dalton is at the top of this list. But also: Locke Lamora is a GREAT character, I love him to the ends of the earth... or Fermin from The Shadow of the Wind series... LOVE HIM. And despite not having watched ANY of the show really, I would die for Stiles Stilinski from Teen Wolf.

Favorite color: purple and green

Favorite animal: shire horse

Coffee, tea, or hot chocolate: tea - I drink SOOO much tea it’s inappropriate... thought I have been told by several English people that I do it wrong.

Average sleep: 6.5-7 hours

🐈 or 🐕 person: dog person - we had cats when I was younger, and they’re just not my people.

Number of blankets: one home made quilt - it was a wedding gift from my pseudo mom

Dream trip: I would rent a lodge in the Canadian Rockies and I would fly all of my writers friends to come and stay. And we would drink tea and hot chocolate and write and brainstorm and watch our favourite shows and movies together and play board games. And if we did it in the summer we would go on hikes during the day and come back for writing sessions at night... it would be the MOST AMAZING. Plus: all my best friends together in one place.

Blog established: Wow... I actually have no idea... late 2000′s I think... but I was off and on for a while until I really got back on in the summer of 2018 and started going fandom crazy.

Followers: pffff, numbers are irrelevant. it’s quality not quantity that I care about, and I’ve got that in spades.

Random fact: I have read The Silmarillion 5 times all the way through - bonus random fact: I have 3 copies of the Lord of the Rings, 2 copies of the Hobbit, and 2 copies of the Silmarillion... I may be a bit of a Tolkien nerd...

Tag 20 people?! That’s too many people to think of this late at night!!! I’ll tag a few, but I don’t think I’ll hit 20...

@orianess @rai-knightshade @thethistlegirl @panchostokes @i-deduce-skeletons @sky-larking @mac-in-cairo @frozenmemories1987 @purplecolouredglasses

Ok... I’m tapped... it’s too late for brain function... If you’re reading this consider yourself tagged!!! Also: never any pressure to do these things! Only if you want to, and only if it’s fun!

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sundrieddeadaccount · 5 years

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In Depth Bio - Cassie Dalton

Name: Cassandra Dalton

Name Meaning: N/A

Age: 22

Ethnicity: White

Species: Human

Height: 5′4″

Weight: 134lbs

Hair Color: Dark Auburn

Eye Color: Green/Hazel

Birthday: March 18th, 1876

Gender: Female

Distinguished Features: Freckled and often sunburnt face

Health

Mental Illnesses or Disorders: PTSD

Medications: N/A

Addictions: Whiskey and tobacco cigarettes

Likes: Nature, wildlife, her horses and guns

Dislikes: Saint Denis, O’Driscolls, poachers

Career: Moonshiner and collector, sometimes brings in dangerous bounties

Hobbies/Talents: Can outride anyone who calls themselves a true horseman, loves to play guitar and piano at her bar when she gets the chance

Family: Henry Dalton (deceased); Judith Dalton (deceased)

Romantic/Love Interest(s): N/A

Pets: Several horses and a dog

Favorite Food: Anything with deer meat

Favorite Color: Purple

Favorite Genre of Music: Saloon tunes

Favorite Movie Genre: N/A

Favorite Animal: Wild horses and armadillos

Degree of Education: Can read/write, basic education from childhood

What language(s) can they speak?: English and a bit of Spanish she’s picked up from members of her old gang

Can they cook?: Yes, she makes a mean deer stew

Personality

Positive Traits: Independent, caring, helpful

Negative Traits: Has a bad habit of pistol whipping people, not always open to trusting people

They way they interact with others: Cassie is very reserved but is always kind, respectful, loves to joke and laugh and is willing to help anyone

Kryptonite: Her horses

Backstory

Cassie, daughter of Henry and Judith Dalton, was born into a struggling ranching family who lived outside of Armadillo, New Austin. Cassie spent the majority of her childhood chasing after her father, helping him tend to the horses and cattle and often assisted her parents on taking what little supplies they had harvested to surrounding ranches and towns.

One evening on their way home from delivering supplies in Blackwater, Cassie and her parents were ambushed by a notorious gang. After seeing there were no supplies and growing tired of hearing their pleading voices, Henry and Judith lost their lives. The commotion caught the attention of a rival gang who came to Cassie’s rescue. With no family to live with, the gang that saved her life took her under their wing.

Throughout her teen and young adult years, Cassie was taught various “life skills” such as how to successfully pickpocket, rob a store, gather herbs, track and hunt wildlife. Cassie spent most of her time scouting on horseback with her close friend Mae, a fellow gang member, looking for new camp locations. Cassie and Mae became very close and considered one another sisters.

When Cassie was 18, she began to accompany Mae and the men of the gang in larger robberies such as bank and train jobs. On a warm, sunny summer day, the gang made their way to the Lemoyne National Bank and proceeded to rob it. After breaking the code and bagging hundreds of dollars, Cassie exited the bank only to witness Mae being brutally beaten and shot to death in the street. Barely escaping with her own life, Cassie lived in the swamps for several days before tracking down her gang. Destroyed from the grief of watching her sister die in front of her, Cassie took her share of the money, saddled up her horse Mordecai, and left a life of wrongdoing behind. She couldn’t bear to watch another friend die.

Cassie’s freedom, however, did not last long. While shopping in Rhodes, she was wrongly accused of murder. Because of her rough appearance, the police believed her accusers and she was arrested. She spent many months tethered to a ball and chain at Sisika Penitentiary before being freed by Mr. Horley and Jessica LeClerk. In exchange for being released, Cassie promised Ms. LeClerk that she would help her seek revenge not only on those who killed her husband and put her in jail, but on those who killed her parents and her sister, Mae.

Cassie not only seeks personal revenge, she does what she can to help those who are struggling or are in danger. When she’s not assisting others, Cassie spends her time hunting, fishing and picking herbs. She also helps run a Moonshine business, collects valuable items and occasionally partakes in bounty hunting. She loves to explore rugged trails with her horses, which she considers her closest friends, and does her best to avoid Saint Denis, for its brick streets bring back far too many memories.

{thank you @gangofgunslingers for the template}

#rdo #red dead online #myocs

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wa-sabi · 5 years

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Once upon a time in...Hollywood.

[SPOILERS AHEAD]

I am very happy with Once upon a time in Hollywood, a plotless movie. The absence of a specific storyline made totally sense in my opinion as this isn’t a movie about people, but rather a movie about a microcosm that is cinema, with its ascending and falling stars in a very specific time in history, 1969, which becomes the perfect laboratory to observe dynamics that are as old as Hollywood: the rise and fall of an actor’s career. I believe it’s important to stress that in the case of Rick Dalton’s, it doesn’t occur because of a specific reason. Nothing or no-one can be blamed for the descending path of his career, actually when we see him he is in the middle of his professional crisis. Yet never is implied that he lacks talent, professionalism or that someone came to replace him. His alcoholism is the consequence rather than the cause of the crisis he goes through and, again, is not a personal crisis but much wider as it involves a whole genre. I believe this is well portrayed through Rick and Cliff’s friendship and even if at first I had the impression of the latter being nothing but the mirror of Leo’s character, the ghost of his past career lingering around to give him something to hold onto when his success slowly disappears, actually he is far from being Dalton’s mere acting double. Cliff has a distinctive personality and we see the story even from his perspective. He is much diverse from Rick, remaining solid through the struggles he is evidently facing no differently than his fellow friend: indeed he is suspected of murdering his wife, his frustration is violently released against the hippies he meets at the ranch, but I believe he was given the most beautiful piece of metaphor in this movie. If Rick lives on top of Hollywood, Cliff’s house is a caravan instead, one that happens to be located behind a Drive in: just like on set we can find him behind the scenes, so his home is behind a screen.

Their roles in the industry are different and so are their reactions: Cliff doesn’t despise the idea of making spaghetti westerns in Italy to keep working, but Rick Dalton rejects the possibility of it because he is deep into the myth of his own persona. He wants to defend his status in Hollywood more than his career, it seems like he isn’t clinging onto acting itself but on the fame it brought him. Yet his character experiences an evolution, as we see him put his greatest effort in the scene he acts out with the little girl and Luke Perry. It’s where we see in him a passion for acting, the wish to prove his talent to himself and his on screen partners before exiting with dignity the scenes as he finally comes to terms with the end of his era. But even if at opposite stages of their careers, Sharon and Rick are somehow comparable. They both experience the feeling of “not being recognized”: we see Rick in the changing room, talking with Lancer’s director about his costume and he complains that with the hair and the mustache Sam Wanamaker suggested to put on him “people wouldn’t recognize his face”. On the other hand we see Sharon Tate at the cinema hall, to watch the movie she stars in The Wrecking Crew, taking a minute to have herself recognized as one of the actors. It was an interesting juxtaposition, showing how a the beginning and the end of a career collide right in the moment when not many people recognize you: not as many as before or not many yet. A further parallelism can be seen during the airport scenes (hello Jackie Brown!): Sharon is returning to LA with Polanski at the beginning of the movie; later in the movie Dalton and his Italian wife do the same, but within a much different context. Sharon is received by a crowd of photographers, Rick passes by unnoticed while Cliff is carrying his baggage, both material and emotional.

Yet if Tarantino could rewrite history, we owe it to Rick Dalton and his successful series Bounty Law: the members of the Manson cult can readjust their murderous intents and target him instead (with no success) just because they recognized him, after being redirected away from the private street where he and Tate live. So no differently from what he did with inglorious bastards, Tarantino changes the turn of events to serve his narrative intent and in this case, saving Sharon’s life was the only correct epilogue to a story meant to celebrate cinema and its ability of making everything possible. Just like Tarantino proved by changing Sharon’s fate. If the title of the movie is supposed to recall a fairytale, it’s exactly a happy ending what we get: Rick is not discarded as only a memory of the past, as both him and Cliff triumph as the heroes of the night. At the end of the movie he is invited to Tate’s house and he is reminded as a great actor, praised for his talent and received by Sharon herself, hugging him as if to welcome him on her side in the Olympus of the legends of Hollywood, where Rick earned his righteous place. He lives on in the memory of the new generation, Sharon herself remains in our and they will know no death, ever, because cinema, just like every form of art, is what made them immortal.

I have to say this movie pleasantly surprised me because the Manson cult had no space in it, if not to be ridiculed as they were by the hands of a stunt man and the bite of a dog. There was nothing intriguing in the representation they receive in this movie because they are shown for what they actually were: a bunch of toxic freaks, lobotomized by the words of a charismatic leader who isn’t shown for longer than a couple of minutes. I loved the distance it was visually created in the movie between him and Sharon on the day he walks up the hill and peeks at her who is standing by the door: she appears high and unreachable, somehow holy as the light in the scene of her dancing in her house envelops her in gold, as if she was a goddess. I believe Tarantino to be helplessly in love with her.

Lastly the theme of television and violence. It is very clearly explored in the scene where the four Manson followers are in the car, discussing on what to do after Rick scared them away from his house and one of the girls( which is supposed to be Susan Atkin, Sharon Tate’s actual murderer) comes up with the plan of killing Dalton. Indeed they recognize him as the lead of the series Bounty Law and decide to cast punishment above him: tv shows have taught them nothing but violence and killing, and so as a sort of counterbalance, they come up with the idea of killing one of their tv mentors, which is Dalton himself who made a career off the role of a bounty hunter. Now the motif they fabricate is absurd as it’s only meant to be an alibi for a wish of revenge that originates elsewhere, being it in a disturbed personality, marginalization or a profound social unrest. When Cliff visits the commune at the ranch we see Squeaky and others stuck in front of a television, but their perversions cannot be blamed on television they so avidly watch: It’s more likely that it was the isolation from society, the large use of drugs and being brainwashed by Mason’s prophecies to shape the members of that commune into murderers. But after all Tarantino’s movies aren’t meant to be a social or psychological analysis and in this movie, where he is dealing with real life people, there is no real violence. None of the real characters is hurt or is hurt for real: Sharon isn’t killed; when Cliff is fighting the cult members (which portray real people) he is tripping off a cigarette soaked in acid and Rick is hella drunk, giving us the impression of it all being an hallucination. I believe that Tarantino was very careful in dealing with the killings in this movie, making sure violence remained confined to fictional characters and fictional ways. Realistically, who would ever die by getting hit in the face with a dog food can and burnt in the pool by a famous Hollywood actor who happens to keep flame thrower in his backyard? It’s the absurdity of it all that makes it acceptable. Real life violence on the other hand is a different matter, and Tarantino doesn’t even try to approach it.

Conclusively, this movie was not the movie of my life, but it was something from a point of view I never saw and very fun to watch. It was romantic, yet realistic, and I’d love to watch it again.

FUN FACTS!

In the credit scene Rick Dalton advertises a cigarette brand, Red Apple, which Tarantino invented and we can see in both Pulp Fiction and Kill Bill (and more).

A special mention goes to Brandy, who won at this year Cannes film festival the Palm Dog award. Speaking of Tarantino’s brand, we find a new one dedicated to her: Wolf’s tooth. Good food for mean dogs!

The movie is also FILLED with references to other movies, a lot of which are actual Spaghetti Westerns from Italian directors (Sergio Corbucci is a real director) and we find a reference to Polanki’s own movie Tess which is based on the novel Tess of the D’Urbervilles: we see Sharon Tate buy a copy for her husband the bookstore before going to the movie theatre.

#once upon a time in hollywood #spoilers #spoiler #my personal thoughts.

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emachinescat · 4 years

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Murdoc + Ithika + Mac

A MacGyver Fan-Fiction

by @emachinescat

@febuwhump day 14 - “I didn’t mean it”

Summary: As an artist, Murdoc prides himself in taking his time with his work - he never loses control. Except one time, with his favorite boy genius. He always imagined that when he finally made MacGyver cry, it would be his finest moment. Now, he’s not so sure.

Characters: Murdoc, Mac, Jack

Words: 3,454

TW: torture, broken bones, Murdoc being his creepy little self

Note: Happy Valentine's Day – the store was all out of chocolate, so I got you Mac whump! ;) The allusions to Ithika are from Homer's epic by the same name, but even more so from the incredible poem by C.P. Cavafy. The muse mentioned, Melpomene, is the Muse of Tragedy.

Keep reading here, or on AO3!

If you enjoy, please consider liking, commenting, or re-blogging, and you can follow me for more content like this!

Ithika gave you the marvelous journey.

Without her you wouldn't have set out.

She has nothing left to give you now.

- From “Ithika” by C. P. Cavafy

Murdoc enjoyed taking his time.

He was an artist, after all, and artists didn’t slap together a masterpiece in an afternoon – not the ones worth anything, at least. Most spent days studying their subjects, becoming intimately familiar with every line and curve and element – the shading, the lighting, the vibrancy of the colors. The very best didn’t even consider touching brush to canvas until they had developed a personal relationship with their subject – for how can a true artist paint that which he does not know deeply? Why bother recreating that landscape or tea kettle or sad-eyed little girl or bowl of fruit if it could be any landscape, tea kettle, little girl, or bowl of fruit? Why would someone paint something that wasn’t theirs?

Murdoc knew his subject very well. He, like a true artist, had studied it in a variety of settings. He’d watched and learned, dug deep into the core of its being, drawn out every secret and motivation and loss and love. He understood what made his subject tick. He’d even done some brief sketches, practicing each brushstroke with care, waiting patiently for the day he could at last, intricately, evoke that muse sought by the Romantics, that evasive Melpomene, and breathe his masterpiece to life. Or, more accurately, to death.

And now, after years of watching, interacting, teasing, sketching, his time had finally come. Months of planning had been sunk into this particular endeavor. And now, unlike the first time he’d been introduced to his subject, he hadn’t been commissioned by anyone. This portrait was personal, deeply personal. He finally had his subject right where he wanted it. The canvas was bare and waiting for the artist’s touch. Murdoc had chosen his palette, mixed the colors – it might be cliche, but he was a sucker for red, black, and blue.

Now that his moment had finally arrived, however, it didn’t mean that he could rush through the actual creation process. The act of studying one’s subject matter was slow and deliberate. So must be the painting.

***

Murdoc studied his canvas slowly, methodically, unsurprised that it wasn’t exactly blank. MacGyver stood, hands chained above his head, attached to a grate above. His bare toes just reached the cold concrete below. His jacket and Henley had been removed – he shivered slightly from the chill of the basement. Murdoc liked to think it was from fear.

“Oooh, this one’s fun, MacGyver!” Murdoc crooned as the blonde boy wonder eyed him scornfully. It was quite entertaining how expressive his prey’s pretty blue eyes could be. Murdoc briefly brushed the tip of his little finger against the scar of a bullet wound on MacGyver’s chest. MacGyver jerked back from the touch, though his expression remained stoic.

“Jealous that you weren’t the one who did it, Murdoc?” He sounded confident enough, but Murdoc knew his subject quite well by now. MacGyver was shaken. For once, he had no control, nothing to work with, no way to escape. He was at his captor’s mercy – Murdoc could do whatever he wanted, and MacGyver knew that.

“Oh, it’s nothing compared with what I’ve got planned for you, Angus,” Murdoc simpered sweetly, circling his catch of the day, dark eyes darting across more scars and recent cuts and bruises. He pressed directly into the dark center of a boot-tip bruise on MacGyver’s side, relishing the sharp intake of breath it elicited. “Someone on your last mission in Volgograd left their mark, I see.”

He circled back around to face his victim, who did a subpar job of hiding his surprise at the observation. “That was highly classified. How did you–”

“I’ve been watching you for a very long time, MacGyver. But you had to have known I would. After all, you’re my closest friend, and I know where you live. It’s kind of silly that you never moved, but maybe you just figured I’d find you even if you did. I wonder – have you always tossed and turned in your sleep or is that a more recent development?”

True horror flashed momentarily in blue eyes, tugging Murdoc’s lips up into a satisfied smile. “Oh, yes, your nightmares are very entertaining. I do hope the majority of them are about me. Oh, oh, oh! And I especially love it when they’re so bad you have to call your watch dog to calm you down. I wonder how Dalton’s taking your disappearance, by the way? I’m sure he’s in for some nightmares of his own.”

“He’ll find me, if I don’t escape first.” MacGyver’s bravado was both highly endearing and incredibly tiresome. Same old, same old.

“Doubtful,” Murdoc purred. “I mean, I know you well enough not to make stupid mistakes, my friend.”

“I escaped from the sewers, and you’d drugged me.”

“I intended for you to escape that day. I needed to draw your friends in, to focus their attention on finding you while I attended to other business. But this time – you’re mine.” At the fervor in his words, a shudder entirely unrelated to cold clinked the chains restraining his victim. Murdoc smiled, then continued.

“But now, there is no ulterior motive. I grabbed you for no other reason than because I wanted to. You are hidden away quite well, even more securely than last time, I’m afraid. And you will not be left alone, not even for a second. There may be things in this room you could use to escape, but they’re useless to you in your position. And I am not going to take my eyes off of you. You won’t have a chance to wriggle your way out of this one, MacGyver. Ooooh, is that fear I see on your face? No? We really must change that.” He tutted. “Defiance and bravado really are your bread and butter, aren’t they, Angus? What are you, an action hero from a cheesy 1980s TV show?” Silence, though the fiery glare spoke more loudly than words.

Murdoc clapped his hands together. “Well, there’s no time like the present. What do you say, MacGyver? Let’s get started.”

***

Three hours later, Murdoc admired his work. It was a slow process. He painted with precision and care, layering the colors just so, balancing the strokes, the lights and darks and brights. His brushes were many – laid out on the table before him were knives and pliers and blow torches and hammers and whips and cattle prods and other more specialized tools that he liked to work up to. He also had an oversized meat tenderizer, made of steel. He rarely used it – too garish for his refined tastes – but it did look nice and scary looming over the other instruments.

So far, he’d only used his knives and the cattle prod. The masterpiece was starting to come together, but it was hardly complete. He prowled around his artwork. MacGyver’s trembling had increased. He gasped for breath as Murdoc appraised his work – burns and cuts, some deeper than others – made a nice foundation. The drip of blood across bare flesh outshone any Pollock painting. He’d practiced his blending techniques, jabbing the cattle prod directly into the center of the lovely bruise he’d noticed earlier. MacGyver hadn’t been able to hold in his yell of pain.

Music.

“Are you enjoying our time together?” Murdoc asked.

MacGyver uttered a creative string of curse words that made Murdoc proud. He whistled appreciatively. “Who knew the boy scout had that in him? I’m almost impressed.”

“Yeah, well,” MacGyver said, hissing as he shifted and pulled at his many wounds. “Almost is about all you’ll ever be, Murdoc.”

Murdoc had been reaching for his trusty pair of pliers (those toenails could sure use a trim!). He paused, his back partially to his captive, fingers hovering over the tool. He was used to MacGyver’s sass, but what he’d just said hit a sour note that the hit man couldn’t shake. He didn’t know if it was the tone or the words themselves. “Excuse me?” He tried to sound amused, but his voice was tight, as if it had been squeezed out of him.

A clink of the chains, a grunt of pain that didn’t lighten Murdoc’s mood as it should have. Then, MacGyver elaborated. His voice was clipped in pain, breathless, but conviction lined every syllable. “You are doomed to live a life of almost, Murdoc. Nothing is ever going to be enough for you. Why do you think you take so long to get anything done? Why do you spend so much time talking and taunting and watching and waiting?”

Murdoc didn’t move, his hand still inches away from his delicate instrument that caused pain but did no lasting damage. “I’m an artist.”

“You’re afraid.”

“I fear nothing.”

“You fear winning.”

Murdoc laughed, a forced, uncomfortable sound that he’d never heard come from his own mouth. “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard, Angus. Are you sure the pain isn’t getting to your head?”

MacGyver pressed on relentlessly. “You crave attention. You need a challenge. That’s why you picked me. And you’re afraid of what happens if you beat me. If I die, there’s always that possibility that you won’t find another playmate.”

Still, Murdoc didn’t move. His words, despite their teasing jaunt, had a forced quality to them. “Awfully full of ourselves, aren’t we, MacGyver?”

He could hear the triumphant smile in his adversary’s voice. “I’m just stating the truth, Murdoc. You might torture me, you might have your fun. But at the end of the day, you’re going to slip up somehow. It’s your way of making sure the game goes on. Without that challenge, what are you? Just an angry voice screaming at the sky, no purpose, no point. You say you’ve studied me, Murdoc. You’ve watched me and know me. Well, in doing so, you’ve shown me yourself, too. You’re not going to kill me today. You’re never going to kill me.

“I don’t know what exactly I’ve done to deserve this… honor,” he continued, placing particular derision on the last word, “but you’ve become obsessed with me, Murdoc. Believe me, I don’t like saying this any more than you like hearing it. But it’s how I know I’m going to walk away from this. If I’m gone, so is your fun.”

Murdoc prided himself on maintaining control over his emotions. An artist, though he might express the inner workings of his soul on canvas, could not let his feelings control the brush, control him. Look what had happened to Van Gogh – sure, beautiful work, but his emotions controlled him, destroyed him in the end. Murdoc didn’t make mistakes like that. He waited. He didn’t lash out in anger. It wasn’t because he wanted MacGyver to live, oh no. His fondest dream was to see the blonde boy cry, to watch him squirm and beg for mercy, and then, finally, only when he’d really begged for it, to send him to his death. MacGyver had no idea what he was talking about.

It wasn’t even MacGyver’s words, his cocky belief that he was important enough to his torturer to keep alive, that sent Murdoc over the edge. It was the tiny little voice, way back in the darkest, most depraved corner of his already dark and depraved mind, the one that spoke not in the voice of Murdoc, but one that sounded more like Dennis, the first casualty of Murdoc’s career – himself. The voice said, plainly, without emotion, You know he’s right.

And that was the catalyst for the tsunami of rage that crashed into Murdoc, pummeling his well-practiced and unshakable resolve to take his time. That was what spurred his frozen body into movement, curled his fingers around the handle of the meat tenderizer, that brash, archaic tool, rather than the pliers. That was what spit his next words out of his mouth as if they were poison, words that finally – beautifully – caused Angus MacGyver’s eyes to widen in real fear: “You are going to walk out of here?” A sadistic, mad giggle. “My dear Angus, it will be a miracle if you ever walk again.”

He hefted the heavy steel implement in his hand, pulled back, and lunged. MacGyver tried to back away, the chains around his wrists cackling and clicking against one another in his desperation. They held firm, and the meat tenderizer slammed full force into MacGyver’s left kneecap. Murdoc felt the crunch of bones. He heard the bestial howl, the scream of anguish, the body-jerking, breath stealing cry of a man in so much pain he lost himself. He watched MacGyver’s face drain of color, recognized the moment when the pain became too much, and saw the tear-streaked face go slack, the chin thud against the battered chest and stay there.

For a moment, Murdoc experienced the euphoria one could only find in hurting that special someone in such a catastrophic way. He relished in that moment the scream, the agony, the writhing and loss of control.

Then the moment ended – and far too soon.

Immediately after, the weapon dropped out of Murdoc’s limp fingers. It smashed into the floor below, with the jarring clang that only metal on concrete can produce. He looked at the limp, hanging form before him, and something twisted inside of him – a feeling he’d never known. It wasn’t guilt, nor revulsion.

It was, however, regret.

He didn’t understand it. He should be overjoyed. MacGyver was completely at his mercy. Murdoc could kill him now. Carve that bleeding heart out like a villain in a fairy tale would. But then, he realized, MacGyver would be gone. Forever. Even now, his kneecap had been crushed, shattered into tiny fragments of bone and cartilage, and unless he got treatment of the highest quality, and soon, he’d almost certainly be crippled. Even if he had extensive reconstructive surgery, his career as a Phoenix agent could still be over.

Wasn’t that what Murdoc had wanted? To end MacGyver’s pesky existence, to win at this game of cat and mouse? To create his most spectacular masterpiece with his greatest enemy? That’s what he had dreamed of for years now, what he’d studied and practiced and yearned for. And yet –

What was it that hoity toity Greek poet had written? Murdoc had read “Ithika” long ago, a random page in a poetry book of a man he’d killed. For some reason, the poem had attached itself to his mind and never let go. He could remember it even now:

Keep Ithika always in your mind. Arriving there is what you’re destined for. But don’t hurry the journey at all. Better if it lasts for years, so you’re old by the time you reach the island, wealthy with all you’ve gained on the way, not expecting Ithika to make you rich. Ithika gave you the marvelous journey. Without her you wouldn’t have set out. She has nothing to give you now.

And he understood. The poem was supposed to be inspirational, for fools so focused on their goals that they missed the journey of life along the way – a mundane, silly sentiment. But now Murdoc could see – MacGyver’s destruction was his Ithika. Perhaps Cavafy had a point – maybe he had been a bit of an artist himself. And MacGyver had been right about some things, wrong about others.

He was right in that Murdoc wasn’t ready to end the game just yet. But it wasn't fear that held him back, that urged him to take his time. It was joy. Joy of the journey. The little pleasures of life that are so often passed by in the grand scheme of things – the poet had been speaking of knowledge, of friendship, of love, of experiences. Murdoc’s little pleasures were things like fear, drawn-out suffering, playing with his food and watching it squirm. He relished that joy. He wanted more of it, and if MacGyver died, or was out of commission as a spy, that joy would diminish. Even if MacGyver lived, it wouldn’t be the same if he couldn’t fight back, couldn’t play along.

Murdoc made his decision.

He reached into his pocket, pulled out a burner phone. He dialed a number he’d memorized long ago, put the phone to his ear.

A fierce Texas twang answered before the first ring had run its course. “Murdoc, you son of a bitch–”

“Temper, Jack,” Murdoc drawled. He shivered in excitement at the mental picture of the inferno in Dalton’s eyes. “You just assumed it was me – imagine if it were your mother on the other line.”

“I can scent the devil from a mile away.” Murdoc heard muffled voices in the background, knew the call was being traced.

“Don’t waste your time running a trace, you grumpy old hound dog.” His words were light, yet he allowed the slightest hint of urgency to infect them. “I’ve had my fun for today. I’ll text you the address.” He paused. “Oh, and bring one of those fancy whirly-birds you like to use for medical emergencies. I might have been a little… over zealous this time.”

He closed his eyes, gorging on the incalculable levels of hatred in Jack Dalton’s next words. “If you hurt him–”

Appreciation turned to irritation. Murdoc rolled his coal eyes to the ceiling. “Weren’t you listening, you brute? Obviously, I hurt him. Quite a bit actually. You should have heard him scream.”

A short silence. Then – “You didn’t let me finish, you overgrown sewer rat. If you hurt him, I am going to tear you limb from limb. I don’t need any of your fancy tools.”

“Hmm, that was almost intimidating,” Murdoc teased in his most good-natured tone. “But you’ll have to find me first.” He let the words linger for just a moment, then continued: “Anyway, ta-ta for now. I’ll text you the address. I’ll be long gone by the time you get here, but feel free to bring all your little friends for a game of hide and seek. Though I have a feeling that you’re going to be more focused on sweet Angus.”

He hung up, texted the address, then turned to a feebly stirring MacGyver. Pity he was waking up right as Murdoc had to leave. Whimpers that would have torn the very soul out of Jack Dalton erupted unbidden from MacGyver’s lips. Glazed blue eyes cracked open, regarding Murdoc with a mixture of terror and acceptance. Though he had regained consciousness, MacGyver still hung limply from the chains, too weak and in pain to move.

Murdoc stepped forward, eliciting the tiniest of flinches Even that motion made MacGyver cry out. But Murdoc didn’t hurt him again. Instead, he said, “Your friends are on their way.”

MacGyver’s voice rasped in the aftermath of his screams. “You’re letting … me go… Why?”

“Got bored, I suppose.” No way was Murdoc going to let MacGyver know he’d been right, even if only a little bit.

MacGyver didn’t respond – maybe he didn’t know how to respond; more likely, he could barely form coherent thoughts, let alone words, amidst the torrent of pain.

Murdoc started to step away, then turned back, studying his latest draft of the elusive masterpiece that he would continue to dream about and that would fuel his passion and creativity for years to come. He pulled off one black glove, placed his hand on a pale, cold cheek. MacGyver jerked back feebly from the touch, grunting at the pain it produced. Slowly, Murdoc wiped one of the fresher tears away with his thumb. It might have been a power play. It might have been a show of comfort. Even the hit man didn’t know. He glanced down at the shattered knee, swollen and misshapen, a grotesque monster straining to break free from the unrelenting fabric of the khakis.

“For what it’s worth,” he said quietly, moving his gaze up from the deformed knee to lock his black eyes with fearful, anguished blue ones, “I didn’t mean it.”

He walked away, casting one final look over his shoulder before he left his art behind for the coming Phoenix agents to admire. “Until next time, MacGyver.”

And despite the extensive search conducted by Phoenix once MacGyver had been loaded onto the chopper, on his way to the best orthopaedic surgeons in the country, Murdoc had once more disappeared, like a ghost.

That night he dreamed about his Ithika, and this time, it was enough.

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grigori77 · 5 years

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2019 in Movies - My Top 30 Fave Movies (Part 2)

20. FROZEN 2 – so, another year, then, and once again Disney doesn’t QUITE manage to net the animated feature top spot on my list, but it’s not for lack of trying – this long-awaited sequel to the studio’s runaway hit musical fantasy adventure is just what we’ve come to love from the House of Mouse, but more importantly it’s a most worthy sequel, easily on a par with the much beloved origin. Not much of a surprise given the welcome return of all the key people, from directors Chris Buck and Jennifer Lee (who also once again wrote the screenplay) to composer Christophe Beck and songwriters Kristen Anderson-Lopez and Robert Lopez, as well as all the key players in the cast. It’s business as usual in the kingdom of Arendelle, where all is seemingly peaceful and tranquil, but Queen Elsa (Idina Menzel) is restless, haunted by a distant voice that only she can hear, calling to her from a mysterious past she just can’t place … and then she accidentally awakens the four elemental spirits, sending her homeland into mystical turmoil, prompting her to embark on a desperate search for answers with her sister Princess Anna (Kristen Bell), ice harvester Kristoff (Jonathan Groff), his faithful reindeer companion Sven, and, of course, living snowman Olaf (Josh Gad). Their quest leads them into the Enchanted Forest of Northuldra, a neighbouring kingdom, ruled by simple, elemental magic, that has remained cut off from Arendelle for decades, where they discover dark, hidden truths about their own family’s past and must make peace with the spirits if they’re to save their home and their people. So, typical Disney family fantasy fare, then, right? Well, Frozen 2 certainly dots all the Is and crosses all the Ts, but, like the original, this is no jaded blockbuster money spinner, packed with the same kind of resonant power, skilful inventiveness and pure, show-stopping WOW-factor as its predecessor, but more importantly this is a sequel that effectively carves out a fresh identity for itself, brilliantly taking the world and characters in interesting new directions to create something fresh, rewarding and worthwhile on its own merit. The returning cast are all as strong as ever, Menzel and Bell in particular ably powering the story, while it’s nice to see both Groff and Gad getting something new to do with their own characters too, even nabbing their own major musical numbers; there’s also a welcome slew of fresh new faces to this world, particular Sterling K. Brown (This is Us, Black Panther, The Predator) as lost Anrendelle soldier Mattias and former Brat Pack star Martha Plimpton as Yelena, leader of the lost tribe of Northuldra. Once again this is Disney escapism at its very best, a heart-warming, soul-nourishing powerhouse of winning humour, emotional power and child-like wonder, but like the first film the biggest selling point is, of course, that KILLER soundtrack, with every song here a total hit, not one dud among them, and there are even ear-worms here to put Let It Go to shame – Into the Unknown was touted as the major hit, and it is impressive, but I was particularly affected by Groff’s unashamedly full-bore rendition of Lost in the Woods, a bona fide classic rock power ballad crafted in the fashion of REO Speedwagon, while the undeniable highlight for me is the unstoppable Show Yourself, with Menzel once again proving that her incredible voice is a natural force all in itself. Altogether, then, this is an absolute feast for the eyes, the ears AND the soul, every inch the winner that its predecessor was and also EASILY one of Disney’s premier animated features for the decade. So it’s quite the runner-up, then …

19. ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD – since his explosion onto the scene twenty-seven years ago with his runaway smash debut Reservoir Dogs, Quentin Tarantino has become one of the most important filmmakers of his generation, a true master of the cinematic art form who consistently delivers moving picture masterpieces that thrill, entertain, challenge and amuse audiences worldwide … at least those who can stomach his love of unswerving violence, naughty talk and morally bankrupt antiheroes and despicably brutal villains who are often little more than a shade different from one another. Time has moved on, though, and while he’s undoubtedly been one of the biggest influences on the way cinema has changed over the past quarter century, there are times now that it’s starting to feel like the scene is moving on in favour of younger, fresher blood with their own ideas. I think Tarantino can sense this himself, because he recently made a powerful statement – after he’s made his tenth film, he plans to retire. Given that OUATIH is his NINTH film, that deadline is already looming, and we unashamed FANS of his films are understandably aghast over this turn of events. Thankfully he remains as uncompromisingly awesome a writer-director as ever, delivering another gold standard five-star flick which is also most definitely his most PERSONAL work to date, quite simply down to the fact that it’s a film ABOUT film. Sure, it has a plot (of sorts, anyway), revolving around the slow decline of the career of former TV star Rick Dalton (Leonardo Dicaprio), who languishes in increasing anonymity in Hollywood circa 1969 as his former western hero image is being slowly eroded by an increasingly hacky workload guest-starring on various syndicated shows as a succession of punching-bag heavies for the hero to wale on, while his only real friend is his one-time stunt double, Cliff Booth (Brad Pitt), a former WW2 hero with a decidedly tarnished reputation of his own; meanwhile new neighbours have moved in next door to further distract him – hot-as-shit young director Roman Polanski (Rafal Zawierucha), riding high on the success of Rosemary’s Baby, and his new wife Sharon Tate (Margot Robbie). Certainly this all drives the film, along with real-life events involving one of the darkest crimes in modern American history, but a lot of the time the plot is largely coincidental – Quentin uses it as a springboard to wax lyrical about his very favourite subject and pay loving (if sometimes irreverently satirical) tribute to the very business he’s been indulging in with such great success since 1992. Sure, it’s also about “Helter Skelter” and the long shadow cast by Charles Manson and his band of murderous misfits, but this is largely incidental, as we’re treated to long, entertaining interludes as we follow Rick on a shoot as the bad guy in the pilot for the Lancer TV series, visit the notorious Spahn Ranch with Cliff as he’s unwittingly drawn into the lion’s den of the deadly Manson Family, join Robbie’s Tate as she watches “herself” in The Wrecking Crew, and enjoy a brilliant montage in which we follow Rick’s adventures in Spaghetti westerns (and Eurospy cinema) after he’s offered a chance to change his flagging fortunes, before the film finally builds to a seemingly inevitable, fateful conclusion that Tarantino then, in sneakily OTT Inglourious Basterds style, mischievously turns on its head with a devilish game of “What If”. The results are a thoroughly engrossing and endlessly entertaining romp through the seedier side of Hollywood and a brilliant warts-and-all examination of the craft’s inner workings that, interestingly, reveals as much about the Business today as it does about how it was way back in the Golden Age the film portrays, all while delivering bucket-loads of QT’s trademark cool, swagger, idiosyncratic genius and to-die-for dialogue and character-work, and, of course, a typically exceptional all-star cast firing on all cylinders. Dicaprio and Pitt are both spectacular (Brad is endearingly taciturn, playing it wonderfully close to the vest throughout, while Leo is simply ON FIRE, delivering a mercurial performance EASILY on a par with his work on Shutter Island and The Wolf of Wall Street – could this be good enough to snag him a second Oscar?), while Robbie consistently endears us to Tate as she EFFORTLESSLY brings the fallen star back to life, and there’s an incredible string of amazing supporting turns from established talent and up-and-comers alike, from Kurt Russell, Al Pacino and a very spiky Bruce Dern to Mike Moh (in a FLAWLESS take on Bruce Lee), Margaret Qualley, Austin Butler and in particular Julia Butters as precocious child star Trudi Fraser. Packed with winning references, homages, pastiches and ingenious little in-jokes, handled with UTMOST respect for the true life subjects at all times and shot all the way through with his characteristic flair and quirky, deliciously dark sense of humour, this is cinema very much of the Old School, and EVERY INCH a Tarantino flick. With only one more film to go the implied end of his career seems much too close, but if he delivers one more like this he’ll leave behind a legacy that ANY filmmaker would be proud of.

18. CRAWL – summer 2019’s runner-up horror offering marks a rousing return to form for a genre talent who’s FINALLY delivered on the impressive promise of his early work – Alexandre Aja made a startling debut with Switchblade Romance, which led to his big break helming the cracking remake of slasher stalwart The Hills Have Eyes, but then he went SPECTACULARLY off the rails when he made the truly abysmal Piranha 3D, which I wholeheartedly regard as one of THE VERY WORST FILMS EVER MADE IN ALL OF HUMAN HISTORY. He took a big step back in the right direction with the admittedly flawed but ultimately enjoyable and evocative Horns (based on the novel by Stephen King’s son Joe Hill), but it’s with this stripped back, super-tight man-against-nature survival horror that the Aja of old has TRULY returned to us. IN SPADES. Seriously, I personally think this is his best film to date – there’s no fat on it at all, going from a simple set-up STRAIGHT into a precision-crafted exercise in sustained tension that relentlessly grips right up to the end credits. The film is largely just a two-hander – Maze Runner star Kaya Scodelario plays Haley Keller, a Florida college student and star swimmer who ventures into the heart of a Category 5 hurricane to make sure her estranged father, Dave (Saving Private Ryan’s Barry Pepper), is okay after he drops off the grid. Finding their old family home in a state of disrepair and slowly flooding, she does a last minute check of the crawl-space underneath, only to discover her father badly wounded and a couple of hungry alligators stalking the dark, cramped, claustrophobic confines. With the flood waters rising and communications cut off, Haley and Dave must use every reserve of strength, ingenuity and survival instinct to keep each other alive in the face of increasingly daunting odds … even with a premise this simple, there was plenty of potential for this to become an overblown, clunky mess in the wrong hands (a la Snakes On a Plane), so it’s a genuinely great thing that Aja really is back at the height of his powers, milking every fraught and suspenseful set-piece to its last drop of exquisite piano-wire tension and putting his actors through hell without a reprieve in sight. Thankfully it’s not JUST about scares and atmosphere – there’s a genuinely strong family drama at the heart of the story that helps us invest in these two, Scodelario delivering a phenomenally complex performance as she peels back Haley’s layers, from stubborn pedant, through vulnerable child of divorce, to ironclad born survivor, while reconnecting with her emotionally raw, repentantly open father, played with genuine naked intensity in a career best turn from Pepper. Their chemistry is INCREDIBLY strong, making every scene a joy even as it works your nerves and tugs on your heartstrings, and as a result you DESPERATELY want to see them make it out in one piece. Not that Aja makes it easy for them – the gators are an impressively palpable threat, proper scary beasties even if they are largely (admittedly impressively executed) digital effects, while the storm is almost a third character in itself, becoming as much of an elemental nemesis as its scaly co-stars. Blessedly brief (just 87 minutes!) and with every second wrung out for maximum impact, this is survival horror at its most brutally, simplistically effective, a deliciously vicious, primal chill-ride that thoroughly rewards from start to finish. Welcome back, Mr Aja. We’ve missed you.

17. SHAZAM! – there were actually THREE movies featuring Captain Marvel out in 2019, but this offering from the hit-and-miss DCEU cinematic franchise is a very different beast from his MCU-based namesake, and besides, THIS Cap long ago ditched said monicker for the far more catchy (albeit rather more oddball) title that graces Warner Bros’ last step back on the right track for their superhero Universe following the equally enjoyable Aquaman and franchise high-point Wonder Woman. Although he’s never actually referred to in the film by this name, Shazam (Chuck’s Eugene Levy) is the magically-powered alternate persona bestowed upon wayward fifteen year-old foster kid Billy Batson (Andi Mack’s Asher Angel) by an ancient wizard (Djimon Hounsou) seeking one pure soul to battle Dr. Thaddeus Sivana (Mark Strong), a morally corrupt physicist who turns into a monstrous supervillain after becoming the vessel for the spiritual essences of the Seven Deadly Sins (yup, that thoroughly batshit setup is just the tip of the iceberg of bonkersness on offer in this movie). Yes, this IS set in the DC Extended Universe, Shazam sharing his world with Superman, Batman, the Flash et al, and there are numerous references (both overt and sly) to this fact throughout (especially in the cheeky animated closing title sequence), but it’s never laboured, and the film largely exists in its own comfortably enclosed narrative bubble, allowing us to focus on Billy, his alter ego and in particular his clunky (but oh so much fun) bonding experiences with his new foster family, headed by former foster kid couple Victor and Rosa Vazquez (The Walking Dead’s Cooper Andrews and Marta Milans) – the most enjoyably portions of the film, however, are when Billy explores the mechanics and limits of his newfound superpowers with his new foster brother Freddy Freeman (It Chapter 1’s Jack Dylan Glazer), a consistently hilarious riot of bad behaviour, wanton (often accidental) destruction and perfectly-observed character development, the blissful culmination of a gleefully anarchic sense of humour that, until recently, has been rather lacking in the DCEU but which is writ large in bright, wacky primary colours right through this film. Sure, there are darker moments, particularly when Sivana sets loose his fantastic icky brood of semi-corporeal monsters, and these scenes are handled with seasoned skill by director David F. Sandberg, who cut his teeth on ingenious little horror gem Lights Out (following up with Annabelle: Creation, but we don’t have to dwell on that), but for the most part the film is played for laughs, thrills and pure, unadulterated FUN, almost never taking itself too seriously, essentially intended to do for the DCEU what Guardians of the Galaxy and Ant-Man did for the MCU, and a huge part of its resounding success must of course be attributed to the universally willing cast. Eugene Levy’s so ridiculously pumped-up he almost looks like a special effect all on his own, but he’s lost none of his razor-sharp comic ability, perfectly encapsulating a teenage boy in a grown man’s body, while his chemistry with genuine little comedic dynamo Glazer is simply exquisite, a flawless balance shared with Angel, who similarly excels at the humour but also delivers quality goods in some far more serious moments too, while the rest of Billy’s newfound family are all brilliant, particularly ridiculously adorable newcomer Faithe Herman as precocious little motor-mouth Darla; Djimon Hounsou, meanwhile, adds significant class and gravitas to what could have been a cartoonish Gandalf spoof, and Mark Strong, as usual, gives great bad guy as Sivana, providing just the right amount of malevolent swagger and self-important smirk to proceedings without ever losing sight of the deeper darkness within. All round, this is EXACTLY the kind of expertly crafted superhero package we’ve come to appreciate in the genre, another definite shot in the arm for the DCEU that holds great hope for the future of the franchise, and some of the biggest fun I had at the cinema this past year. Granted, it’s still not a patch on the MCU, but the quality gap finally seems to be closing …

16. ALITA: BATTLE ANGEL – y’know, there was a time when James Cameron was quite a prolific director, who could be counted upon to provide THE big event pic of the blockbuster season. These days, we’re lucky to hear from him once a decade, and now we don’t even seem to be getting that – the dream project Cameron’s been trying to make since the end of the 90s, a big live action adaptation of one of my favourite mangas of all time, Gunnm (or Battle Angel Alita to use its more well-known sobriquet) by Yukito Kishiro, has FINALLY arrived, but it isn’t the big man behind the camera here since he’s still messing around with his intended FIVE MOVIE Avatar arc. That said, he made a damn good choice of proxy to bring his vision to fruition – Robert Rodriguez is, of course, a fellow master of action cinema, albeit one with a much more quirky style, and this adap is child’s play to him, the creator of the El Mariachi trilogy and co-director of Frank Miller’s Sin City effortlessly capturing the dark, edgy life-and-death danger and brutal wonder of Kishiro’s world in moving pictures. 300 years after the Earth was decimated in a massive war with URM (the United Republics of Mars) known as “the Fall”, only one bastion of civilization remains – Iron City, a sprawling, makeshift community of scavengers that lies in the shadow of the floating city of Zalem, home of Earth’s remaining aristocracy. Dr. Dyson Ido (Christoph Waltz) runs a clinic in Iron City customising and repairing the bodies of its cyborg citizens, from the mercenary “hunter killers” to the fast-living players of Motorball (a kind of supercharged mixture of Rollerball and Death Race), one day discovering the wrecked remains of a female ‘borg in the junkyard of scrap accumulated beneath Zalem. Finding her human brain is still alive, he gives her a new chassis and christens her Alita, raising her as best he can as she attempts to piece together her mysterious, missing past, only for them both to discover that the truth of her origins has the potential to tear their fragile little world apart forever. The Maze Runner trilogy’s Rosa Salazar is the heart and soul of the film as Alita (originally Gally in the comics), perfectly bringing her (literal) wide-eyed innocence and irrepressible spirit to life, as well as proving every inch the diminutive badass fans have been expecting – while her overly anime-styled look might have seemed a potentially jarring distraction in the trailers, Salazar’s mocap performance is SO strong you’ve forgotten all about it within the first five minutes, convinced she’s a real, flesh-and-metal character – and she’s well supported by an exceptional ensemble cast both new and well-established. Waltz is the most kind and sympathetic he’s been since Django Unchained, instilling Ido with a worldly warmth and gentility that makes him a perfect mentor/father-figure, while Spooksville star Keean Johnson makes a VERY impressive big screen breakthrough as Hugo, the streetwise young dreamer with a dark secret that Alita falls for in a big way, Jennifer Connelly is icily classy as Ido’s ex-wife Chiren, Mahershala Ali is enjoyably suave and mysterious as the film’s nominal villain, Vector, an influential but seriously shady local entrepreneur with a major hidden agenda, and a selection of actors shine through the CGI in various strong mocap performances, such as Deadpool’s Ed Skrein, Derek Mears, From Dusk Til Dawn’s Eiza Gonzalez and a thoroughly unrecognisable but typically awesome Jackie Earle Haley. As you’d expect from Rodriguez, the film delivers BIG TIME on the action front, unleashing a series of spectacular set-pieces that peak with Alita’s pulse-pounding Motorball debut, but there’s a pleasingly robust story under all the thrills and wow-factor, riffing on BIG THEMES and providing plenty of emotional power, especially in the heartbreaking character-driven climax – Cameron, meanwhile, has clearly maintained strict control over the project throughout, his eye and voice writ large across every scene as we’re thrust headfirst into a fully-immersive post-apocalyptic, rusty cyberpunk world as thoroughly fleshed-out as Avatar’s Pandora, but most importantly he’s still done exactly what he set out to do, paying the utmost respect to a cracking character as he brings her to vital, vivid life on the big screen. Don’t believe the detractors – this is a MAGNIFICENT piece of work that deserves all the recognition it can muster, perfectly set up for a sequel that I fear we may never get to see. Oh well, at least it’s renewed my flagging hopes for a return to Pandora …

15. AD ASTRA – last century, making a space exploration movie after 2001: A Space Odyssey was a pretty tall order. THIS century, looks like it’s trying to follow Chris Nolan’s Interstellar – love it or hate it, you can’t deny that particular epic space opera for the IMAX crowd is a REALLY tough act to follow. At first glance, then, writer-director James Gray (The Yards, We Own the Night) is an interesting choice to try, at least until you consider his last feature – he may be best known for understated, gritty little crime thrillers, but I was most impressed by 2016’s ambitious period biopic The Lost City of Z, which focused on the groundbreaking career of pioneering explorer Percy Fawcett, and couldn’t have been MORE about the indomitable spirit of discovery if it tried. His latest shares much of the same DNA, albeit presented in a VERY different package, as we’re introduced to a more expansive Solar System of the near future, in which humanity has begun to colonize our neighbouring worlds and is now pushing its reach beyond our own star’s light in order to discover what truly lies beyond the void of OUTER space. Brad Pitt stars as Major Roy McBride, a career astronaut whose whole life has been defined by growing up in the shadow of his father, H. Clifford McBride (Tommy Lee Jones), a true pioneer who led an unprecedented expedition to the orbit of our furthest neighbour, Neptune, in order to search for signs of intelligent life beyond our solar system, only for the whole mission to go quiet for the past sixteen years. Then a mysterious, interplanetary power surge throws the Earth into chaos, and Roy must travel farther than he’s ever gone before in order to discover the truth behind the source of the pulse – his father’s own ill-fated Lima Project … this is a very different beast from Interstellar, a much more introspective, stately affair, revelling in its glacial pacing and emphasis on character motivation over plot, but it’s no less impressive from a visual, visceral standpoint – Gray and cinematographer Hoyt van Hoytema (who, interestingly, ALSO shot Interstellar, along with Nolan’s Dunkirk and his upcoming feature Tenet) certainly make space look truly EPIC, crafting astonishing visuals that deserve to be seen on the big screen (or at the very least on the best quality HDTV you can find). There’s also no denying the quality of the writing, Gray weaving an intricate story that reveals far greater depth and complexity than can be seen at first glance, while Roy’s palpable “thought-process” voiceover puts us right into the head of the character as we follow him across the endless void on a fateful journey into a cosmic Heart of Darkness. There is, indeed, a strong sense of Apocalypse Now to proceedings, with the younger McBride definitely following a similar path to Martin Sheen’s ill-fated captain as he travels “up-river” to find his Colonel Kurtz-esque father, and the performances certainly match the heft of the material – there’s an impressive collection of talent on offer in a series of top-quality supporting turns, Jones being just the icing on the cake in the company of Donald Sutherland, Liv Tyler, John Ortiz and Preacher’s Ruth Negga, but the undeniable driving force of the film is Pitt, his cool, laconic control hiding uncharted depths of emotional turmoil as he’s forced to call every choice into question. It’s EASILY one of the finest performances of his career to date, just one of the MANY great selling points in a film that definitely deserves to be remembered as one of the all-time sci-fi greats of the decade. An absolute masterpiece, then, but does it stand tall in comparison to Interstellar? I should say so …

14. BRIGHTBURN – torpedoing Crawl right out of the water in the summer, this refreshing, revisionist superhero movie takes one of the most classic mythologies in the genre and turns it on its head in true horror style. The basic premise is an absolute blinder – what if, when he crashed in small-town America as a baby, Superman had turned out to be a bad seed? Unsurprising, then, that it came from James Gunn, who here produces a screenplay by his brother and cousin Brian and Mark Gunn (best known for penning the likes of Journey 2: the Mysterious Island, but nobody’s perfect) and the directorial big break of his old mate David Yarovesky (whose only previous feature is obscure sci-fi horror The Hive) – Gunn is, of course, an old pro at taking classic comic book tropes and creating something completely new with them, having previously done so with HUGE success on cult indie black comedy Super and, in particular, Marvel’s Guardians of the Galaxy movies, and his fingerprints are ALL OVER this one too. The Hunger Games’ Elizabeth Banks (who starred in Gunn’s own directorial debut Slither) and David Denman (The Office) are Tori and Kyle Breyer, a farming couple living in Brightburn, Kansas, who are trying for a baby when a mysterious pod falls from the sky onto their land, containing an infant boy. As you’d expect, they adopt him, determined to keep his origin a secret, and for the first twelve years of his life all seems perfectly fine – Brandon’s growing up into an intelligent, artistic child who loves his family. Then his powers manifest and he starts to change – not just physically (he’s impervious to harm, incredibly strong, has laser eyes and the ability to disrupt electronic devices … oh, and he can fly, too), but also in personality, as he becomes cold, distant, even cruel as he begins to demonstrate some seriously sociopathic tendencies. As his parents begin to fear what he’s becoming, things begin to spiral out of control and people start to disappear or turn up brutally murdered, and it becomes clear that Brandon might actually be something out of a nightmare … needless to say this is superhero cinema as full-on horror, Brandon’s proclivities leading to some proper nasty moments once he really starts to cut loose, and there’s no mistaking this future super for one of the good guys – he pulverises bones, shatters faces and melts skulls with nary a twitch, just the tiniest hint of a smile. It’s an astonishing performance from newcomer Jackson A. Dunn, who perfectly captures the nuanced subtleties as Brandon goes from happy child to lethal psychopath, clearly demonstrating that he’s gonna be an incredible talent in future; the two grown leads, meanwhile, are both excellent, Denman growing increasingly haunted and exasperated as he tries to prove his own son is a wrong ‘un, while Banks has rarely been better, perfectly embodying a mother desperately wanting to belief the best of her son no matter how compelling the evidence becomes, and there’s quality support from Breaking Bad’s Matt Jones and Search Party’s Meredith Hagner as Brandon’s aunt and uncle, Noah and Meredith, and Becky Wahlstrom as the mother of one of his school-friends, who seems to see him for what he really is right from the start. Dark, suspenseful and genuinely nasty, this is definitely not your typical superhero movie, often playing like Kick-Ass’ deeply twisted cousin, and there are times when it displays some of the same edgy, black-hearted sense of humour, too. In other words, it’s all very James Gunn. It’s one sweet piece of work, everyone involved showing real skill and devotion, and Yarovesky in particular proves he’ll definitely be one-to-watch in the future. There are already plans for a potential sequel, and given where this particular little superhero universe seems to be heading I think it could be something pretty special, so fair to say I can’t wait.

13. STAR WARS EPISODE IX: THE RISE OF SKYWALKER – wow, this one’s proven particularly divisive, hasn’t it? And I thought The Last Jedi caused a stir … say what you will about Rian Johnson’s previous entry in the juggernaut science fiction saga, while it certainly riled up the hardcore fanbase it was at least well-received by the critics, not to mention myself, who found it refreshing and absolutely ingenious after the crowd-pleasing simplicity of JJ Abrams’ admittedly still thoroughly brilliant The Force Awakens. After such radical experimentation, Abrams’ return to the director’s chair can’t help feeling a bit like desperate backpedalling in order to sooth a whole lot of seriously ruffled feathers, and I’ll admit that, on initial viewing, I couldn’t help feeling just a touch cheated given what might have been if similarly offbeat, experimentally-minded filmmaker Colin Trevorrow (Safety Not Guaranteed, Jurassic World) had stayed on board to helm the picture. Then I got home, thought about it for a bit and it started to grow on me, before a second viewing helped me to reconcile all everything that bugged me first time around, seemingly the same things that have, perversely, ruffled so many more feathers THIS TIME. This doesn’t feel like a retcon job, no matter what some might think – new developments in the story that might feel like whitewash actually do make sense once you think about them, and the major twists actually work when viewed within the larger, overarching storyline. Not that I’m willing to go into any kind of detail here, mind you – this is a spoiler-free zone, thank you very much. Suffice to say, the honour of the saga has in no way been besmirched by Abrams and his co-writer Chris Terrio (sure, he worked on Batman V Superman and Justice League, but he also wrote Argo), the final film ultimately standing up very well indeed alongside its trilogy contemporaries, and still MILES ABOVE anything we got in George Lucas’ decidedly second-rate prequels. The dangling plot strands from The Last Jedi certainly get tied up with great satisfaction, particularly the decidedly loaded drama of new Jedi Rey (Daisy Ridley) and troubled First Order Supreme Leader Kylo Ren/Ben Solo (Adam Driver), while the seemingly controversial choice of reintroducing Ian McDiarmid’s fantastically monstrous Emperor Palpatine as the ultimate big bad ultimately works out spectacularly well, a far cry from any perceived botched fan-service. Everyone involved was clearly working at the height of their powers – Ridley and Driver are EXCEPTIONAL, both up-and-coming young leads truly growing into the their roles, while co-stars John Boyega and Oscar Isaac land a pleasingly meaty chunk of the story to finally get to really explore that fantastic chemistry they teased on The Last Jedi, and Carrie Fisher gets a truly MAGNIFICENT send off in the role that defined her as the incomparable General Leia Organa (one which it’s still heartbreaking she never quite got to complete); other old faces, meanwhile, return in fun ways, from Anthony Daniels’ C-3PO FINALLY getting to play a PROPER role in the action again to a brilliant supporting flourish from the mighty Billy Dee Williams as the Galaxy-Far-Far-Away’s own King of Cool, Lando Calrissian, while there’s a wealth of strong new faces here too, such as Lady Macbeth’s Naomie Ackie as rookie rebel Jannah, Richard E. Grant as suitably slimy former-Imperial First Order bigshot Allegiant General Pryde, The Americans’ Keri Russell as tough smuggler Zorii Bliss and Lord of the Rings star Dominic Monaghan as Resistance tech Beaumont Kin. As fans have come to expect, Abrams certainly doesn’t skim on the spectacle, delivering bombastic thrill-ride set-pieces that yet again set the benchmark for the year’s action stakes (particularly in the blistering mid-picture showdown between Rey and Kylo among the wave-lashed remains of Return of the Jedi’s blasted Death Star) and awe-inspiring visuals that truly boggle the mind with their sheer beauty and complexity, but he also injects plenty of the raw emotion, inspired character work, knowing humour and pure, unadulterated geeky FUN he’s so well known for. In conclusion, then, this is MILES AWAY from the clunky, compromised mess it’s been labelled as in some quarters, ultimately still very much in keeping with the high standards set by its trilogy predecessors and EVERY INCH a proper, full-blooded Star Wars movie. Ultimately, Rogue One remains THE BEST of the big screen run since Lucas’ Original Trilogy, but this one still emerges as a Force to be reckoned with …

12. JOKER – no-one was more wary than me when it was first announced that DC and Warner Bros. were going to make a standalone, live-action movie centred entirely around Batman’s ultimate nemesis, the Joker, especially with it coming hot on the heels of Jared Leto’s thoroughly polarizing portrayal in Suicide Squad. More so once it was made clear that this WOULD NOT be part of the studio’s overarching DC Extended Universe cinematic franchise, which was FINALLY starting to find its feet – then what’s the point? I found myself asking. I should have just sat back and gone with it, especially since the finished product would have made me eat a big slice of humble pie had I not already been won over once the trailers started making the rounds. This is something new, different and completely original in the DC cinematic pantheon, even if it does draw major inspiration from Alan Moore’s game-changing DC comics mini-series The Killing Joke – a complete standalone origin story for one of our most enduring villains, re-imagined as a blistering, bruising psychological thriller examining what can happen to a man when he’s pushed far beyond the brink by terrible circumstance, societal neglect and crippling mental illness. Joaquin Phoenix delivers the performance of his career as Arthur Fleck, a down-at-heel clown-for-hire struggling to launch a career as a stand-up-comic (badly hampered by the fact that he’s just not funny) while suffering from an acute dissociative condition and terrible attacks of pathological laughter at moments of heightened stress – the actor lost 52 pounds of weight to become a horrifically emaciated scarecrow painfully reminiscent of Christian Bale’s similar preparation for his acclaimed turn in The Machinist, and frequently contorts himself into seemingly impossible positions that prominently accentuate the fact. Fleck is a truly pathetic creature, thoroughly put-upon by a pitiless society that couldn’t care less about him, driven by inner demons and increasingly compelling dark thoughts to act out in increasingly desperate, destructive ways that ultimately lead him to cross lines he just can’t come back from, and Phoenix gives his all in every scene, utterly mesmerising even when his character commits some truly heinous acts. Certainly he dominates the film, but then there are plenty of winning supporting turns from a universally excellent cast to bolster him along, from Zazie Beetz as an impoverished young mother Arthur bonds with and Frances Conroy (Six Feet Under, American Horror Story) as Arthur’s decidedly fragile mother Penny to Brett Cullen (The Thorn Birds, Lost) as a surprisingly unsympathetic Thomas Wayne (the philanthropic father of future Batman Bruce Wayne), while Robert De Niro himself casts a very long shadow indeed as Murray Franklin, a successful comedian and talk show host that Arthur idolizes, a character intentionally referential to his role in The King of Comedy. Indeed, Martin Scorsese’s influence is writ large throughout the entire film, reinforced by the choice to set the film in a 1981-set Gotham City which feels very much like the crumbling New York of Mean Streets or Taxi Driver. This is a dark, edgy, grim and unflinchingly BRUTAL film, frequently difficult to watch as Arthur is driven further into a blazing psychological hell by his increasingly stricken life, but addictively, devastatingly compelling all the same, impossible to turn away from even in the truly DEVASTATING final act. Initially director Todd Phillips seemed like a decidedly odd choice for the project, hailing as he does from a predominantly comedy-based filmmaking background (most notably Due Date and The Hangover trilogy), but he’s actually a perfect fit here, finding a strangely twisted beauty in many of his compositions and a kind of almost uplifting transcendence in his subject’s darkest moments, while his screenwriting collaboration with Scott Silver (8 Mile, The Fighter) means that the script is as rich as it can be, almost overflowing with brilliant ideas and rife with biting social commentary which is even more relevant today than in the period in which it’s set. Intense, gripping, powerful and utterly devastating, this truly is one of the best films of 2019. If this was a purely critical Top 30 this would have placed in the Top 5, guaranteed …

11. FAST & FURIOUS PRESENTS HOBBS & SHAW – summer 2019’s most OTT movie was some of THE MOST FUN I had at the cinema all year, a genuinely batshit crazy, pure bonkers rollercoaster ride of a film I just couldn’t get enough of, the perfect sum of all its baffling parts. The Fast & Furious franchise has always revelled in its extremes, subtle as a brick and very much playing to the blockbuster, popcorn movie crowd right from the start, but it wasn’t until Fate of the Furious (yup, the ridiculous title says it all) that it really started to play to the inherent ridiculousness of its overall setup, paving the way for this first crack at a new spin-off series sans-Vin Diesel. Needless to say this one fully embraces the ludicrousness, with director David Leitch the perfect choice to shepherd it into the future, having previously mastered OTT action through John Wick and Atomic Blonde before helming manic screwball comedy Deadpool 2, which certainly is the strongest comparison point here – Hobbs & Shaw is every bit as loud, violent, chaotic and thoroughly irreverent, definitely playing up the inherent comic potential at the core of the material as he cranks up the humour. Dwayne Johnson and Jason Statham take centre stage as, respectively, DSS agent Luke Hobbs and former SAS black operative Deckard Shaw, the ultimate action movie odd couple once again forced to work together to foil the bad guy and save the world from a potentially cataclysmic disaster. Specifically Brixton Lore (Idris Elba), a self-proclaimed “black superman” enhanced with cybernetic implants and genetic manipulation to turn him into the ultimate warrior, who plans to use a lethal designer supervirus to eradicate half of humanity (as supervillains tend to do), but there’s one small flaw in his plan – the virus has been stolen by Hattie Shaw (Mission: Impossible – Fallout’s Vanessa Kirby), a rogue MI6 agent who also happens to be Deckard’s sister. Got all that? Yup, the movie really is as mad as it sounds, but that’s part of the charm – there’s an enormous amount of fun to be had in just giving in and going along with the madness as Hobbs and the two Shaws bounce from one overblown, ludicrously destructive set-piece to the next, kicking plenty of arse along the way when they’re not jumping out of tall buildings or driving fast cars at ludicrous speeds in heavy traffic, and when they’re not doing that they’re bickering with enthusiasm, each exchange crackling with exquisite hate-hate chemistry and liberally laced with hilarious dialogue delivered with gleeful, fervent venom (turns out there’s few things so enjoyable as watching Johnson and Statham verbally rip each other a new one), and the two action cinema heavyweights have never been better than they are here, each bringing the very best performances of their respective careers out of each other as they vacillate, while Kirby holds her own with consummate skill that goes to show she’s got a bright future of her own. As for Idris Elba, the one-time potential future Bond deserves to be remembered as one of the all-time great screen villains ever, investing Brixton with the perfect combination of arrogant swagger and lethal menace to steal every scene he’s in while simultaneously proving he can be just as big a badass in the action stakes; Leitch also scatters a selection of familiar faces from his previous movies throughout a solid supporting cast which also includes the likes of Fear the Walking Dead’s Cliff Curtis, From Dusk Till Dawn’s Eiza Gonzalez and Helen Mirren (who returns as Deckard and Hattie’s mum Queenie Shaw), while there’s more than one genuinely brilliant surprise cameo to enjoy. As we’ve come to expect, the action sequences are MASSIVE, powered by nitrous oxide and high octane as property is demolished and vehicles are driven with reckless abandon when our protagonists aren’t engaged in bruising, bone-crunching fights choreographed with all the flawless skill you’d expect from a director who used to be a professional stuntman, but this time round the biggest fun comes from the downtime, as the aforementioned banter becomes king. It’s an interesting makeover for the franchise, going from heavyweight action stalwart to comedy gold, and it’s a direction I hope they’ll maintain for the inevitable follow-up – barring Fast Five, this is THE BEST Fast & Furious to date, and a strong indicator of how it should go to keep conquering multiplexes in future. Sign me up for more, please.

#frozen 2 #Once Upon A Time In Hollywood #crawl #crawl movie #Shazam!#Alita Battle Angel #ad astra #Brightburn #star wars the rise of skywalker #joker #joker movie #hobbs and shaw #2019 in movies

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