#⦗✦| Can be her time from her first year to her sixth year or even her eighth year!! |✦⦘
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florenceafternoon · 21 hours ago
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━。゜✿ jily fic recommendations ✿ ゜。━
Thank you to all the authors who share their wonderful stories with us. I hope this list reminds you that I come back to these stories often and that your words are loved by many.
As always, these fics are set in the wizarding world but aren’t necessarily canon compliant.
For reference, anything in italics is taken from the summaries.
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A Hundred Visions and Revisions by @yallthemwitches
She loves him like this: sleepy, slap happy, sometimes a bit handsy but willing to meet her where she’s at in the moment. It’s the quiet moments like this that keep her going sometimes, knowing that whatever is happening out there will disappear by the end of the day when they can hold each other again.
To live for the hope of it all
Whispers in the Dark also by yallthemwitches
When Lily is awarded her prefect badge in fifth year, they warn her that James Potter has a talent for disappearing... but if that's true, why does he keep coming to her night after night, hoping to be caught?
Until the Light Takes Us also by yallthemwitches
A series of drabbles and fics following the prompt of Jilytober Fest 2024.
color theory by @clare-with-no-i
Lily Evans learns about love: its hues, its tints, its shades. Some disappoint. Some dazzle.
falling (for fools) by @jjameslily
She hated him. Hated his confidence, his messy charm, the way he managed to take up space even when he wasn’t saying a word.
Absolutely. Totally. Without question.
But, as much as she tried to focus, she couldn’t shake the nagging thought.
She’d never noticed just how distracting James Potter could be.
don’t let it make you cry also by jjameslily
Her eyes glistened, the love within her radiating from her. She let it ripple outward, weaving her spirit into the air around him, reaching beyond the veil, hoping he—Harry, their son—would feel it not as a ghost of a fleeting memory, but as a pulse. Alive. Real.
Quid Pro Quo by StarsAndDiamond (on ao3)
Lily Evans was not ready to go home for her sister's Christmas engagement, but she wasn't the only one up late at night in the common room.
Sharper Than Hope by @maraudersftw
“You’re…” A lick of lips; something sharper than hope on my tongue; another attempt. “You fancy me?”
every single time by @gigglesandfreckles-hp
Unrelated drabbles, fics, ficlets, and word dumps in response to jilytober 2024 prompts
2, 5, 10, 11, 12, 16, 19, 21, 27, 29 and 30 are my favourites
Lucky Number 7 by zipadeea (on ao3)
Lily Evans thought life at Hogwarts was busy enough for her, what with Prefect duties and N.E.W.T classes and meetings with the Slug Club. Then, Marlene convinces her to try out for the Gryffindor quidditch team.
Written because James was a Chaser, and I'm convinced Harry's athletic abilities come from both sides of the family tree.
crawl home by @annabtg
He doesn’t know if he’s alive or dead. All he knows is that he wants to go home.
Exhale by @petalsthefish
"Shhh," James leaned forward, pressing his forehead against hers. "I’m so sorry, but I have to set the bones again. It’s okay to cry, you're doing so well. So well, baby."
"Fuck," she whimpered through her tears. "I hate this."
"I know, I know," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. "I hate this too, sweetheart."
Masquerade also by petalsthefish
James was going to jinx Sarah Hitchkes.
It was Sarah Hitchkes who conceived the entire idea, driven by two main motives. First, it was a fun and creative way for everyone to showcase their Patronuses. Second, it gave her the perfect excuse to throw a massive party. Scheduled for July 31st at her sprawling estate, the event was open to all the sixth- and seventh-year students. She dubbed it the “Patronus Party,” and it was set to be the social highlight of the summer—provided you could produce a corporeal Patronus.
this trope will always be a favorite of mine
Coincidence also by petalsthefish
“You look miserable.” Mary commented, noting Lily’s bored expression.
"I need to make out with someone like I need to breathe." Lily Evans hissed as she swirled her butterbeer and peered around the bar.
"James Potter's free."
In Their Short Time by @hogwartslivy
It was one hell of a love story. One that had a most tragic, untimely ending. They could never have guessed as mere children sitting across from one another on the train, all excitement and nerves and emotions, that their stories, all hopes and fears and loves, were to be forever intertwined.
Something Old Something New by @chiechie97
Weddings are the most beautiful things in the world. Unless you accidentally end up at your ex... somethings house to play violin at a family wedding.
Lily Evans just wants to get payed and go home to her cat. Perhaps she should have asked more questinos about the location and clients of her string quartets latest gig.
It’s Always You by @joyseuphoria
5 times jily kissed before they started dating
I'll keep your brittle heart warm by Iphigenniaa (on ao3)
Lily Evans didn't have to wash the blood off her hands that night, but she did have to wash the burning odor from her clothes, which seemed to soak even her own insides.
A Life With You by @kay-elle-cee
A Jily Lives AU collection of small moments from Hogwarts onwards, using the 31 Jilytober tumblr prompts.
7, 8, 10, 11, 12, 15, 17, 18, 20, 22, 24, 29 and 30 are my favourites
don't forget me by blackcanarys (on ao3)
At the height of the First Wizarding War, Lily Evans finds herself contemplating life, death and her mortality after a routine Order mission in 1978.
It's All Politics by acciosalmon (on ao3)
The most constant emotional sentiment in Lily's Hogwarts career was her complete and utter loathing of one William Mulciber
I have yet to read this one, but it was recomended to me because it explores how jily's power dynamic is altered when James isn't potraied as white but Lily is
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todayisafridaynight · 4 months ago
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We rlly don’t need another majima game 😭 please give other characters a chance he already had the spotlight in 0😔
lord if i speak on goro majima.
#snap chats#my last nerve was seeing him front and center on that Three Legends shirt with daigo and saejima im SICK OF HIM#what do you MEAN the Sixth Chairman is backseating majima. like thats his retainer PUT DAIGO UP FRONT#it aint even bias its gen just like. why is the sixth chairman not treated the most important. thats The Chairman of the whole shit#EX chairman whatever we know what i mean#'snap its just a shirt' and these are just my balls alright its all the little things that are like Dawg Cmon#i woulda got the shirt cause it looks like somethign youd get from claires and thats hilarious However ... im annoying.#ill say this then play y0 and be like Ah..... i love you...#fr tho im sick of him GO AWAY YOU ARE NOT THAT GUY#im that meme of spiderman holding back the train and the trains saying mean things about majima#this ire is only brought by rggtwt mates insisting majima needs any more content. like at all.#they gave majima a y0 statue but as far as i can see kiryu doesnt have one like What.#ik i say id skip y0 kiryu if i could during replays and its never that serious but still .... the hell...#my brother in christ majima does not need any more why are you acting starved#i get it hes your fave but my god. goku this trains heavier than i thought i cant do it#ive had beef with rggtwt ever since they tried to say majima was more important to kiryu than haruka. like brb eating a cactus#rgg making gaiden was the worst thing they couldve done cause now everyone wont stop mentioning charas getting a gaiden game#MAJIMA OF ALL OF THEM DOES NOT NEED ONE MFER THATS WHAT Y0 WAS FOR. WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT#THEY GAVE HIM AN EXTRA STORY IN YK2 ALSO LIKE RGG IS DOING THE MOST FOR A SIDE CHARACTER#anyway this is why im happy saejima and akiyama are getting figures. ESPECIALLY AKIYAMA#I FEEL LIKE WE NEVER SEE SHIT OF THAT GUY and saejima. tbh. but still ... akiyama esp just feels left out#big hope other charas start to get more love. like my daughter haruka ok rgg plesae drop one of her idol statues thank you#on a lighter note september is almost upon us which means two things#1.) i have to move back to school at the end of the month 2.) rgg news is soon .....#SOOO curious as to what's on the horizon .. maybe ill stream it for the first time in nine thousand years#ok bye im gonna eat cereal <- diced spam and rice
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bccksmarts · 2 years ago
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❧ MISCELLANEOUS SENTENCE PROMPTS ☙ ⤷ Collection #3
➤ @antihcroes asked: i thought you knew everything. (from mal, i don't have her verse info anywhere on here but she's a slytherin & daughter of a death eater!)
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  Anger bubbled in her gut as she shot the girl a glare. Another snake to clearly undermine her intelligence, a snarky tone to accompany it. Merlin, what utter rubbish. Hermione attempted to steel her resolve, keeping her lips tightly pressed together and averting her gaze.
  ...But that didn't last long whatsoever.
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  ❝You thought wrong.❞ She finally spoke, a growl in her tone. Yes, she knew that Faery was trying to get some sort of rise out of her. A typical Slytherin method, really. Her hands on her hips now, Hermione rolled her eyes, ❝I never once claimed to know everything. I just enjoy reading and learning.❞ She sneered at the other. Who knew Hermione Granger could sneer? ❝Who told you that, hm? Malfoy? That twat can't separate thoughts between his brain and his—❞ And that was when she cut herself off. She didn't need to make that point. No, she didn't.
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unproduciblesmackdown · 2 years ago
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i went through this account’s handful of videos from this show, and i’m pretty confident that’s will roland, next to harrison chad as quince, despite the view being mostly obstructed from the angle this whole time. he’s Most Visible for a moment at the very end lol. since the costuming is just a buttonup and tie w/no especial “it’s This character, or Any character” cues, i’ll guess he’s “will roland” at this point, though that doesn’t mean he wasn’t appearing in some other capacity earlier. every pre-2018 xmas wrole cited in that tweet has been accounted for, but that doesn’t mean he hasn’t been some of those characters more than once, as is definitely true for uncle peenie appearances
#the sixth annual show....twenty thirteen....don't know of any more specific info abt this one. like ''oh xyz pic is from then''#i think the third annual show in twenty ten was Probably his first one / the year of peter the coffee kid but that's still technically#an informed guess as it were lol....and evidently he was in the next yr's show as the christmas burgler / also just [ensemble]#but atm so far as i know regarding definite Dates / the Year; there's only this b/w that & the twenty fifteen 8th annual show there#wherein he was uncle peenie / virgin mary dancer / belly button puppet show puppeteer / will roland At Least#was like hmm twenty twelve/thirteen was The Black Suits times; would he have been able to make it...#but the fact that harrison chad does appear to be there suggests it was entirely plausible for anyone else in the cast to be#what with him playing brandon....and lo & behold does seem to be william next to him there#but yeah can't even speculate ''is This the show in which he played [role listed as having been played but hasn't been seen elsewhere]??''#b/c they've all been seen elsewhere at least the once#the other videos are mostly like twenty or thirty or six second increments of mostly the mister chestnut number & like one other full song#but there was like a forty second recording of Virgin Mary Ft. Her Dancers & i was like god can you imagine. i'll lose it.#by which one means be Head In Hands like keeling over a bit. but none of them was him lmao so [oh lord. imagine] averted beyond that#joe iconis christmas extravaganza#will roland#glad there's a more visible glimpse right at the end but my watching it all prior like Okay Come On Now lmfao#i mean at least it was evident most of the way that there was even a person there to go ''oh huh that could be him'' about#just still thinking about the ''mike wazowski'd but for the viewer / listener looking / listening for him'' experience from the other day#npr affiliate station ep abt gtm:pota that at least cited every oscr cast member by name w/the sole exception of will lmao. cmon#billions wide group shot showing everyone's face except whoops winston in the corner blocked by the group of extras. pointing#but w/these glimpses it's like; hey; it's Anything which is impressive; it's identifiable Enough; also hardly guaranteed. i'll take it
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noisilyscreechingsong · 29 days ago
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Disney princess Danny
It’s known that animals can sense death. Instances where pets gravitate to someone on their death bed and dogs barking at ghosts. Danny already knew this from before he half died, so he was expecting animals to rat him out with their sixth sense or become aggressive or cower from him. Instead, they all behaved the complete opposite than he anticipated.
Stray cats come running to rub against his legs, dogs nearly pull arms out of their owners sockets to get close to him, birds bring him trinkets, raccoons lead him to trash cans full of food, and even squirrels and rats get close to just sit on his shoulders. It’s… weird, but not unwelcome. He always loved animals.
Danny had come to semi-trust the animals that come to him. They know where the good food is and drinking water, they know when to steer away from a certain area right before something happens, and they always know when a person is bad or okay. So when an animal leads him somewhere, he follows. Sometimes they need help and he’s the one they go to. He’s helped plenty of raccoons out of garbage bins and cats out of gutters to have a good relationship with the animals of the streets.
What he isn’t expecting is to be led to Robin again and again.
The first time it was a cat. A mangy old Tom cat that rubbed against his torn up jeans and looked back with - Danny swears- a raised eyebrow. Danny follows and soon enough he finds himself standing a few paces away from Robin who is kneeling down to give clean water to the momma cat and her three kittens.
Robin freezes and so does Danny. They stare at each other.
“Um, hi?”
Robin straightens immediately, leaving the water on the ground where the cats can drink. Tom cat swaggers over to guard them.
“Civilian. Is there something I can assist you with?”
The dude is probably a year or two younger than Danny himself and he has to suppress a smile at the formal tone.
“Oh, uh, no? The cat just led me here.”
He can see Robin glance at the Tom cat who was now licking himself.
“Is that so?”
“Yea. Sorry to interrupt. Animals just like me for some reason.”
The three kittens one by one all totter over to him on unsteady legs after they had their fill. The orange one starts trying to climb his pant leg with its short and sharp claws digging into the jean material.
“They really like me.”
He carefully sits down crossed legged so the others could also climb all over him. Robin watches for a moment silently and when he sees Danny react well to the little pricks from tiny claws, he seems it safe enough to return to patrol.
The second time it’s a couple of rats that lure him away to find Robin fighting off more thugs than he probably should by himself. So taking the rats’ movements as encouragement, he takes the closest thing, a piece of plywood, and hit the nearest guy over the head with it. The guy crumbles like a wet sock and Danny is moving on to the next thug.
They sweep the floor with these guys with only a few splinters and a twisted ankle.
“It was dangerous to intervene,” Robin tells him. “I had it handled.”
“Yea, I know.”
The vigilante didn’t seem to be expecting that response from his stunned silence. He straightens as much as he can with bruised ribs.
“Well, I’m glad you know your mistake. Don’t let it happen again.”
Danny neither agrees nor disagrees, just shrugs and allow the rats to climb up his leg to his shoulder. Robin looks at them curiously. Danny gives a salute before leaving. Robin gives him a nod.
The third time it happened the roles are reversed.
Some people from the local gang are bullying the lonely, homeless teen to run drugs for them. They don’t seem to understand the word ‘no’. It gets to the point where Danny finds himself with his back against the wall and all his exits blocked with a guy shoving him again and again.
“Stop it!”
“I’ll stop if you agree.”
“I’m not doing it!”
Frank the raccoon and his buddy Bobby launch themselves at the guy’s ankles. The guy shrieks and pulls a gun.
“No!”
Before Danny can dive for it, a projectile comes out of nowhere to knock it out of his hands. He can’t even process what happened before the three are running away, two raccoons chattering at their heels before coming back to crowd him in worry.
Danny looks up to see Robin with a sword out threateningly, staring at where the three fled. He sheaths the sword after a few seconds.
“Are you okay?”
Danny realizes he’s breathing a little heavy and slows down a bit as he leans over to pet the top of the two heads.
“I’m- yea, I’m okay. Thanks for the save. Those guys were jerks.”
“I’m inclined to agree.”
Robin is staring at the raccoons and it takes Danny a long moment to piece things together.
“Did- did they lead you to me?”
Robin doesn’t answer right away.
“You have loyal friends.”
Danny smiles at the weird compliment. Looking down at the two heroes of the evening Danny is also inclined to agree.
The fourth time is funny in a way Danny doesn’t know how to describe.
It was the pigeons. They were at fault of course for how Robin’s secret identity was outed. By pigeons.
The grey birds swarmed Danny and settled in a cloud of feathers. One holding something in its beak before plopping it down in his lap like a golden retriever. It flaps off as Danny picks up the obvious wallet clip holding quite a bit of cash and a student ID. The card says Damian Wayne from Gotham Academy. Just then Robin comes skidding around the corner, clearly out of breath and freezes.
Danny looks down at the clip in his hand and back up at the vigilante. He looks at the crazy amount of birds around him and again at the vigilante.
Said vigilante straightens and approaches like he called Danny there.
“If I could have that so I could return it to its proper owner.”
He holds out a hand with false arrogance, but Danny can see the nervousness in his stance. Danny looks down one last time before putting the clip in the outstretched hand without a word.
Robin nods once, pockets the ID and money, and immediately leaves.
The fifth time just cements what Danny had already figured out.
He was at the park. Not Ivy’s park of course, the one where people actually like to go. He was helping the squirrels find and hide acorns when he’s nearly knocked over by a massive black dog.
“Titus!”
The end of the Great Dane’s leash is a familiar face. Damian Wayne’s eyes widen in recognition as he finally sees who Titus was so excited to get to.
“Uh-“
Danny has to close his mouth quickly or else the massive tongue on his face would have turned into a French kiss.
“Titus! Heel!”
Danny laughs at the embarrassed blush on the other’s face, obviously not used to his companion going off the rails like this.
“It’s alright. We both know how animals like me.”
Damian narrows his eyes to analyze the teen. Danny wasn’t about to pretend and Damian looked like he was debating whether to follow his lead or not. There was literally no one within hearing distance.
“Have you told anyone?”
Danny thought about redirecting, but thought better of it. He actually liked Robin and what he did.
“Nope. I haven’t and I won’t. I swear.”
Damian tilts his head and then looks down at Titus. He seems to come to a decision before looking back at Danny.
“You’re homeless, are you not?”
Didn’t think they were being that direct but sure.
“Yea?”
“I will pay you in food and shelter to take care of my animals.”
Danny blinks. Then actually considers the offer.
“What kind of animals? How many we talking?”
Damian grins.
The family finds out pretty quickly when a teen they’ve never seen before walks into the Batcave with two pails of food for the bats, Titus at his heels and Alfred the cat perched contently on his shoulders.
Duke stares and Bruce short circuits.
“Um, who are you?”
“Hi! I’m Danny. Damian employed me to take care of the animals.”
“O…kay?”
“And where is Damian?” Bruce sounds like it physically hurts to ask and Danny does not envy Damian’s position right now.
“Upstairs. I think he said he was going to his art studio.”
Bruce marches past the boy to the stairs before stopping abruptly and turning to Danny and Duke.
“Don’t touch anything. Watch him.”
Duke and Danny blink at each other for a moment as Bruce disappears up the stairs.
“I’m Duke by the way.”
Danny grins.
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giuseppe-yuki · 2 months ago
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money, money, money
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normal!max verstappen x billionaire!reader
w.c.: 6.8k
warnings: curse words, allusions to sex, RUDE people, sprinkle of angst (?)
summary: you introduce max to the good and bad sides of having money.
a/n: roughly inspired by crazy rich asians- one of my fav movies!!!
edit: bonus birthday oneshot :)
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photo credits from pinterest :)
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it was no secret to the majority of the world that your bloodline was rich- filthy rich. with your father’s side of the family owning the equivalent of half a small country and your mother’s side of the family the owners of several major corporations, you had no lack of paper bills in your bank accounts.
along with your siblings and your cousins, you grew up pampered, only going to your country’s best schools and wearing only the latest fashion. you were picked up by a chauffeur in a personal sleek black bentley and had a team of maids at your beck and call. hell, you were even granted access to a private jet in case you wanted to fly somewhere exotic just for fun!
as a child without a sense of the value of money, you thought all children lived like this. every birthday, you expected only the very best from your parents. on your sixth birthday, your parents closed down disneyland and let the kids rampage throughout the park. for your cousin’s grade school graduation, your aunt bought an entire cruise liner (company) and held a week-long party on the water to celebrate. when your little brother passed his driver’s license, your father bought him a customized ferrari pista (that he might have crashed three days in) as his first car. when christmas came by, your grandma flew in your entire family to her private island in first class, and surprised all the kids with their very own mini play homes in the backyard that were each the size of a small apartment. 
slowly, as you matured, you realized how lucky you were. while eating the caviar and champagne at the expensive gala, the homeless were out in the cold, eating the leftover crusts in oily crumpled pizza boxes that they fished out of the trash. each dollar in your bank accounts could go to sick children whose parents couldn’t pay the hospital bills for, and instead, they were going to mega yachts that sat in the monaco bay most of the year. besides, wouldn’t your parents' money run out some time? 
it seemed that many of your cousins and siblings didn’t give a fuck. you watched them exponentially abuse their power, blowing through thousands of grands for luxury cars they drove only once and exclusive rooftop parties where they swam in pools of champagne. one by one, you saw them drop out of school and spend every day as the life of the party. once they rapidly grew out of the excuse of being “young, naive, and not knowing better” their reputation to the general public became “spoiled and out-of-touch” with society. 
you of course, weren’t totally exempt from this. you had to admit that you occasionally spent a few k on a nice little bag for yourself, or had an occasional trip to bali for some sun. however, you focused much more on your studies and helping others than partying. instead of spending your draining your mother’s company assets, wouldn’t it be better to have your own? why wield a black card embellished with your father’s name in gold when it could be your own name? with your own money, you could also donate huge amounts to people in need- all under your name.
slowly, you built up your own credible business using the knowledge you gained, and it soon skyrocketed into a world-wide profitable company. 
even with such success however, all your siblings and cousins laughed at you. running a company? they had chuckled, in their balenciaga suits and miu miu dresses. why do such tedious work when you can just marry into a rich family?
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rich family, you scoff, looking at one of your cousins at the yearly family party that your family threw. though she was dressed to the nines, hair done up and jewelry glistening on her neck, she looked absolutely miserable. her husband, that everyone knew she had just married “for the money” stood on the opposite end of the room, flirting unashamedly with a rather uncomfortable looking waiter. that was really funny, considering that your cousin had been bragging about how much her husband loved her at the last function. she had even shoved a picture of her next to a humongous flower bouquet into your face, teasingly stating how “you never had this experience before, huh?”
your brother wasn’t that much different. although he looked rather successful with a big quarter of your mother’s company stocks, you knew that he was in major debt from burning through his bank accounts gambling at casinos around the world. he paraded around the room with his wife, who hung on his arm so proudly, but only because she didn’t know a thing. if you hinted at your brother’s little “problem,” you knew that she would have the divorce papers ready by afternoon the next day. 
as the party went on and the alcohol broke down the painstakingly-built facades of your family’s relationships, you began to stop envying their so-called perfect lives. you realized that all they knew about was money. what did they know about love?
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love to you was a kind man with blue eyes that crinkled whenever he smiled at you, light brown hair that was oh-so-soft to run through with your hands, and a soothing voice with a twinge of an accent and slight lisp. love smelled like his soft cologne, and tasted like the spiced sweetbreads he would bake on the weekends. 
max was the total opposite from the cocky and money-hungry douchebags from your home country that were more attracted to your wallet and family influence, which was what you liked about him. even the way you met him was different. usually, the men would make it all about themselves, trying to impress you with their “achievements” (owning three ferraris is not a keystone achievement, david) or throwing technical jargon at you to sound smart. if you somehow invited them on a second date, they always showed up late and would tear off their clothes the second they got in the house, expecting to get to third base immediately. however, you met max through a friend of a friend at a small party in monaco. he could barely look you in the eyes and stuttered through his sentences, which you found quite refreshing compared to the arrogant guys that you usually encountered. on your first date, he got you some rather wilty looking tulips, but also brought some homemade bread that you swore was the best you ever ate. on the second date, he yapped about all the flags of all the countries he knew, but you didn’t mind because he let you ramble your own interests after. before long, you moved in with him in his apartment on the edge of monaco, and had the honor of calling him your boyfriend.
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so now, lying in his arms on his tiny bed, you felt more at home than ever. 
the sunlight streams in through the windows above his bed, casting a glow across his face and filtering through his impossibly long eyelashes. you take a minute to admire the angelic scene, before one his cats leaps off of who-knows-where and jumps on his face. 
he yelps, and unwinds his arm from around you to softly push who you assume to be sassy away from his head. 
you flash a glare at sassy for ruining such a nice moment, before picking her up and attempt to “throw” her off the bed. 
unfortunately, max yanks her out of your hands before you are able to.
“hey!” he says in a chastising tone. “be nice to sassy. i’m sure she didn’t mean to.” 
max sits up on the bed and gives sassy a few head scratches before placing a kiss on her soft head. sassy meows at you, which you swear is in a mocking tone. across the room, jimmy sprints over and takes a spot next to max, purring for head scratches too, effectively pushing you off the bed. 
you didn’t understand how your boyfriend couldn’t see that his cats were literally devils. you were basically subject to their abuse every day (i.e. random ankle attacks, knocking over all you fragile items, unplugging your devices, cat hair in your food, and the worst one, stealing max away from you). scowling, you surrender your rightful spot on the bed and pad into the kitchen in your slippers to start the coffee. 
it’s not until both the coffee and breakfast is ready when max finally enters the kitchen, now freshly dressed. the cats scamper around his feet, curling lovingly around his ankles. 
“sorry about that, baby.” he says, pulling out his chair and taking a seat in front of his plate of food. “jimmy and sassy just wanted some love.”
you roll your eyes before settling down into your own seat.
he spears a few sausage links and eggs into his mouth before glancing at the clock. eyes widening, he shoves the rest of the food into his mouth and chugs down the hot coffee.
“so sorry, i have to run!” he sputters out, “i’m going to be late to my engineering meeting!”
he dashes to the bedroom to grab his bag before running back into the kitchen to press a kiss to your cheek in goodbye. 
“have fun at work too, baby!” he yells before the front door slams closed. 
sighing, you finish your plate before washing the dishes in the sink. he was always late for his engineering job at a small office in downtown monaco. max somehow always got to his office in time though, but probably because he raced his little yellow renault clio rs on the streets like he was some type of formula one driver. meanwhile, you had your “work” at home (which typically meant one phone call to your secretary to make sure everything was running smoothly, a quick scroll through your company accounts, and then netflix on the couch).
from the time you met to the time you started dating, you never got to telling max about your family history or your job. it was actually kind of unbelievable that he didn’t notice actually, even when all your clothes were covertly designer and heels were always red bottoms, or when you seemingly traveled out of the country every other weekend for company meetings. however, he never asked, so you never told. 
well, that was until he came home that night. 
his footsteps echo on the ground as he walks out from the bathroom, but stops before he gets into the kitchen
“hey baby,” he says, tilting his head. “what’s this?”
you stop stirring the pasta sauce, looking back to see your freshly showered boyfriend questioningly glancing at your open macbook on the couch.
you must have forgotten to close out of your company bank account tab. quickly, you throw the spoon aside, slam the laptop shut, and throw it to the side. 
“that’s nothing, baby.” you say, rushing back to the kitchen and stirring the bubbling red mixture again. 
“oh-kay…” he says, walking up behind you and reaching over to help strain the pasta noodles. 
while straining the water out in the sink, he flashes you a quick glance. “was it like…” he whispers quietly. “adult material or something?? is that why you didn’t want me to see it?” 
what? 
you look back him, an unimpressed look at your face. “adult material, max???” you repeat back at him. “no. i was not watching adult material on my work laptop.”
“okay, whatever you say, baby.” max says, clearly not believing you. clearing his throat, he continues. “so, um… anyways, my coworker george was talking about how he met his boyfriend alex's parents over the weekend, and i realized that i never met your parents before. do you think we can maybe pay them a visit?"
you freeze, halfway sliding out a plate of garlic bread from the oven. 
“i- um, don’t think that’s wise, maxie.” you reply quietly.
your boyfriend wrinkles his brow. he stops the plating of the noodles and walks over to you, placing a hand on your shoulder.
“is it…is it because they are assholes?” he asks, looking at you seriously. “cause it’s okay if they are- i understand, because my dad…my dad is not very kind either.”
you can’t help to think about your family in your home country. you could never take your maxie there. they would rip him to shreds, degrading him for being rather plain and destitute compared to them. you would never want to put your boyfriend through your parents, either, who would probably criticize him for wanting to marry you just for the money, even if max didn’t know a goddamn thing about how you earned your funds. 
you rub your face. “no, it’s not that.” you sigh, “i- mean- it’s just complicated over there in my home country. i don’t want you to feel pressure or uncomfortable-”
max cuts you off with a hug, and presses a kiss to your cheek. “i really don’t mind, baby. i’d really like to meet the people who made such a kind and beautiful person like you.”
you blush a little at his words. even if you have an uneasy feeling to your stomach, you nod lightly. it can’t be that bad, right?
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if you were to take max over to your home country, there was no doubt he would be exposed to your massive fame and influence there. to slowly ease him into the more luxurious side of your life, you first introduce the luxuries of a private jet the day you take off from the airport.
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“a private JET???” your boyfriend shrieks, looking at his speciality boarding pass. 
hurriedly, you shush him to avoid the glares of other travelers within a yelling distance of you both. 
“max, please be quiet.” you hiss into his ear. “yes, it says private jet.” 
maneuvering your cart with your lv-branded luggage to the side of the terminal, along with max’s one small carry-on and two pet cages with the reincarnations of the devil inside, you pull out your phone to check the location of the driver who would take you to the separate private-jet entrance. 
like magic, he materializes behind you, tapping you on the shoulder. 
politely, he takes your horde of luggages and max’s items before politely gesturing towards a massive black lincoln that was definitely not parked there before. 
“this way miss,” he says curtly, before reaching forward to open the car door for you. 
max, snapping out of his confusion, snaps his hand out first and roughly yanks the door open, and nearly hitting both you and the driver. 
“i’ll open the door for my own girlfriend, thanks!” he retorts, glaring suspiciously at the driver, who just shrugs and starts loading the luggage into the back of the car.
when max climbs into the spacious back of the lincoln, you can’t help but giggle into your hand. 
“max, you need to relax,” you laugh, placing a calming hand on max’s leg. “he’s my driver. it’s his job to open the door, okay?”
your boyfriend sniffs, pouting a little. 
“fine.”
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after boarding the jet and ascending safely into the air, you settle into your padded chair. meanwhile, max runs around the jet like a little kid, pointing out the “special features,” much to the amusement of the staff. 
“omg, baby, look!” he yells, pointing at a wooden-paneled door behind your chair. “the bathroom is huge!” 
you nod, and hum in agreement, sparing a quick glance at max, who was opening and closing the door as if it would change what was behind it. 
he then charges toward a cabinet near the middle of the plane, which is stuffed to the brim with your favorite snacks. “wow!” he shouts, before sprinting towards a similar cabinet further down, which you know is the alcohol storage area. 
there’s a moment of silence before max steps into view with three gin and tonics and one of your favorite drinks in hand. he carefully sets them down in front of you, batting away a disgruntled-looking bartender who held a half-open bottle of gin that you assumed he was in the middle of pouring when max snatched the bottle away. 
you apologize profusely to the bartender while max watches on, straight up chugging his drinks. 
“this is wild!!” he whispers, pointing to the cups in front of him.
no more than five minutes after sending the bartender away with a little tip, max has already finished two of his three gin and tonics and was already bounding out of his seat to explore the rest of the plane. 
once you hear his exclamations of joy from the back of the plane, you know he has discovered the master bedroom.
before you have a chance to take a sip of your own drink, max basically pounces on you and drags you towards the private bedroom. your boyfriend pushes you onto the soft bed, yells out the door. 
“give us a little bit of privacy, okay?” he shouts to no one in particular, before slamming the door shut. 
he turns back to your figure lying spread-eagle in the bed, and wiggles his eyebrows. 
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max is the first one to talk after you both lay on the bed, lips swollen and cheeks red. 
“so…?” he says, running a hand down your back. 
“so… what?” you ask, looking up at him from your position sprawled on top of him. from your point of view, you could feel the slight rise and fall of his chest, his slightly damp hair, and the way his blue, blue eyes study your face. 
“so, when were you going to tell me that you were…like…rich?” he replies.
you maneuver yourself to a sitting position on your boyfriend’s lap, looking him nervously.
“well…” you remark, twiddling your thumbs. this wasn’t the way you thought you were going to break the news to max. 
“i grew up more- comfortably in my home country, thanks to my family and their connections. i was lucky to not have to worry about money at all. when i became a little older, i separated myself from the rest of my siblings and cousins to form and take care of my own company. then, on a business trip, i met you and then.. yeah, you know what happens next.”
an awkward silence fills the room, with max digesting the information and you toying with a stray thread from the bedcovers.
your boyfriend opens his mouth slowly.
“a company?” he questions, turning to you. “what company?”
you scramble off the bed for your phone, and type something quick in the search bar. when you find what you are looking for, you rotate the phone towards your boyfriend, the glowing screen reflecting on his features. 
it only takes one or two seconds for max to scan and decipher the words on the screen.
“YOU’RE THE CEO OF REDBULL??” max shouts.
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when the wheels of your private jet hit the bumpy runway, it was midnight. your pilot’s voice crackles on the intercom, politely notifying you that you have arrived, and are free to disembark whenever you’d like. outside, you can see several workers unloading your luggage, along with jimmy and sassy in their pet carriers.
you turn to max, who was intensely staring at his screen, unmoving. you assume he was still in the middle of his fervent wikipedia dive of you and your family’s entire history that he insisted on learning, once he got over the initial shock. 
“max,” you say, nudging him slightly. 
he doesn’t budge, eyes trained like an eagle on his screen. 
you pull on sweatshirt before nudging him again, this time a little harder. “max, come on, we gotta go.”
he snaps up, and pockets his phone before mock saluting you. “yes, of course, miss ceo! whatever you say!”
you roll your eyes. max was a little extra sometimes.
he trails behind you obediently as you climb down the stairs to get off the plane, and into a sleek black limousine. 
before long, you find yourself on the familiar streets and freeways that you used to frequent when you were younger. it feels the slightest bit nostalgic, so different from the streets of monaco that you became used to thanks to max. 
you look back to find max tilting his head at you. 
“where to now, miss ceo?” he asks in a curious tone.
you smile.
”i know just the place.”
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even when it was close to three am, the downtown streets were still packed with people. vendors engulfed the street sides, selling delicious soups and snacks beckoned to people, and little shops with bright signs advertised souvenirs, clothing, stationary, and everything in between. the car inches to a stop when you come upon a familiar old building that you remember visiting often as a child. bright glittery letters on the storefront and windows exclaim, “lombardi ice cream shop.” a line of people streams out the door, an ode to the delicious creamy treats that the shop has been selling for years. god, you could basically taste the ice cream on your tongue already.
you practically leap out of the car, dragging max with you towards the front of the shop. the red bottoms of your heels click against the concrete, turning many heads in the crowd along the sidewalk. you hear gasps of shock and a few whispers of your name along the crowd. they automatically parts like moses and the red sea when you get closer. max hesitates, wide eyed, at the edge of the crowd. 
”c’mon,” you laugh, taking his hand and leading him through the people.
an old woman, back hunched with age, waddles out of the kitchen and greets you warmly when you arrive at the counter. without realizing, a warm feeling spreads across your chest. she was basically like a second mother to you, considering you spent your entire childhood frequenting this shop with your cousins and siblings. whenever you visited your home country, you would always make sure to pop by her shop (not that she needed your business- her lines always curled around the block, day and night). 
“ahh!! welcome back, honey,” she exclaims, wiping her wrinkled hands on her apron. “you’ve gotten so beautiful!” throwing a glance at a shy max hesitantly hidden behind you, she sends you an eyebrow raise. “ah, and i see you brought a boy back huh?”
you reach over to give the weathered old woman a hug, blushing. “hello, momma lella! yes, this is my boyfriend max.”
max waves a polite hello, one hand still nervously holding yours.
the elderly woman smiles kindly at max, not hiding how she looks him up and down. “well, i approve!” she states, giving you a thumbs up and a wink. “polite and handsome!” 
without another word, she grabs the largest size cup and fills it to the brim with creamy chocolate ice cream. sprinkling a good amount of sprinkles and shoving two spoons into the cup, she offers it to you. 
“on the house!”
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you and max sit on the sidewalk with the cup of ice cream, watching people walk by and cars zoom through the traffic. occasionally, max takes his spoon and shovels a large helping of chocolate ice cream into his mouth. 
“you look like you’re really enjoying the ice cream,” you state, noticing the chocolate smeared over the corners of his mouth.
max just smiles at you in the way he always does, with the dimples and the crinkle in his eyes. 
suddenly, your moment is ruined when a flash goes off in your face.
max jerks back, rubbing his eyes, not used to the invasive cameras that made up your childhood.
you whip around towards the flash, seeing a small herd of paparazzi smiling wickedly. a rare spotting of you in back in your home country for the first time in years? that was payday for them. a flash of anger shoots through you, causing you to throw your wooden spoon at their expensive cameras. unfortunately, it just bounces off of the arm of a short looking man carrying a heavy duty camera.
“what the fuck is wrong with you?” you yell, shooing them away from max. “can you just leave us alone for one second?”
bothersome paparazzi like this was common when you grew up in a family rich with drama and money. you recall them camping in front of your house, shutters clicking once they saw a sign of movement. whatever mistake you made, like tripping over a small rock or fighting with your sister over a doll, was publicized and dramatized into unrecognizable stories on gossip magazines that were popular in your home country. it was a pity that this was max’s first introduction to these pests. 
you pull max with you as you shove your way roughly through the paparazzi. they deserved it if you accidentally smashed someone’s lens. 
max stumbles behind you. 
“wha-?” he says, holding the half-empty chocolate ice cream. “where are we going?”
you huff. “away from those wannabe photographers- i hate them so much.”
you flip open your phone to call your chauffeur, but your app notifies you it would take a total of ten minutes for him to weave through traffic to get to you both. in the distance, the paparazzi raise their cameras again, shutters clicking as they photograph your pissed off expression and a dumbfounded max next to you. you can practically see the headlines tomorrow- ‘bratty billionaire back in country!!’
like a godsend, a futuristic-looking car rumbles to life next to you. that will probably get you home and away from these fuckers fast, right? hurriedly, you march over to the disgruntled middle-aged man in the passengers’ seat.
“five million for your car- right now.” you say, dead serious. 
the man’s eyes widen comically large. 
“five mi-“
you cut him off quickly, seeing the paparazzi darting closer to max, who was still holding the ice cream and eyeing the cameras wearily. 
“yes, five million. i’ll mail you the check.”
without another word, the man tosses you the keys and hefts himself out of the car. you leap into the drivers seat just as he gets out, and jam your finger on the window down button to beckon max into the car immediately. 
the moment he sits down on the expensive-looking leather seats, you rev the engine and leave the paparazzi behind in the dust. 
it’s not until you are halfway back to your penthouse when max finally speaks. 
“this is a super nice car,” he states, running his hand against the interior side panels. 
you look around, really noticing the detailings of the car. the sides look like they are made with some carbon fiber material, and it seemed like it didn’t even have a door handle- just straps you pull on the corner of the dashboard. 
”yeah, i guess so,” you admit. “i just bought this off of that dude back there in order to get away from the damn paparazzi.”
max wrinkles his brows. 
“you bought-?? what??? you know this is an aston martin valkyrie, right?”
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the next morning, when the sun shines through the skyline windows lining your penthouse, you keep your promise by instructing one of your staff to send the promised check to the random guy on the street (fernando, he said his name was). your boyfriend scrolls idly on his phone next to you, probably scrolling through your family’s lengthy wikipedia page again. his cats stamp around your white bedsheets as if they owned the place. you think about what you both could do today. perhaps visit the children’s hospital? before moving to monaco, you frequented many small hospitals, bringing gifts for the children. it always felt good seeing the sick kids light up with joy. or, you could go shopping, although you did spend a little bit much on the random car yesterday. or- 
before you can complete your thought, a familiar ringtone lights up the screen of your phone. your mother’s name lights up your phone, as if taunting you. before you second-guess yourself, you smash your finger into the green ‘answer’ button and place the phone to your ear.
your mother’s voice flows through the speakers, sending a wave of nostalgia throughout your body. 
“darling!” the voice hums, “why didn’t you tell me that you were back in your home country? i had to find out over the silly little paparazzi pictures on the newspapers!” 
damn it, you think, cursing silently in your head. it seemed that the paparazzi from yesterday night had probably sold your pictures to some trashy gossip magazine that had caught the attention of your mother. that meant that you had to face your family sooner or later. 
“hello, mother,” you reply curtly, trying to avoid the topic. “how may i help you?”
your mother tuts through the speakerphone. “oh, your own mother can’t just call to say hello?” 
you groan. “no- i mean yes-“
your mother cuts you off, laughing. “i’m kidding, darling. i just wanted to let you know that i’m hosting a party at our estate tomorrow, to celebrate your arrival! you’ve been in monaco for a god-awful long time. your cousins and siblings will be coming too- i’m sure they’ll all excited to see you after your hiatus in monaco!” 
you hesitate before responding. your first instinct was to say no, because everybody knew full well that the only reason your cousins and siblings even bothered to show up at these kind of events is to save face and show off their new ridiculously expensive clothing and cars, not to welcome you. however, this also gave you a chance for max to meet your parents, like he wanted back in monaco. it isn’t a hard choice when you agree to meet the next day.
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max revs the engine once again as he pulls the valkyrie to stop in front of the valet at the front of your family’s estate. 
through the tinted windows of the car, you see one of your snobby cousins, dressed in an jeweled gown, jump at the loud sound and clutch her husband’s arm tighter however, her husband ignores her to get a good look at your aston martin supercar, which makes you laugh. to your surprise, he is not the only one. a few other family members gather around, admiring the hypercar. 
in the passenger’s seat, max’s mischievous grin slowly turns into a frown of nervousness as he spots the crowd of people gathering around you both. you know it must look intimidating, meeting your significant other’s family, especially when they had such high expectations of you. you place a kiss on his cheek. 
“you ready, maxie?” you ask, patting his shoulder comfortingly. 
he nods, before opening the car door. 
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like the gentleman he is, max quickly hurries over to the passenger’s side of the car to help you out of the car. you gladly take his hand, and step out of the vehicle daintily. straight away, you can hear the confused mutterings and jealous glares of your family members start up, which follow the both of you into the house. 
like expected, your childhood home is decorated a little over the top. people mingle under crystal chandeliers around staircases draped with real flowers. from the second living room, music drifts out that sounds suspiciously like martin garrix. a fancy bar is set up a room that was usually the dining room, with a bottle of every single alcohol you can ever think of. the courtyard, usually empty save a few plants, was turned into outdoor buffet bar, complete with a five story cake and massive chocolate fountain. 
once inside, max attempts to introduce himself to the first friendly-looking family member that he sees, which happens to be your aunt on your mother’s side. he sticks out his hand, a smile gracing his face. 
“hi, my name is max,” he says, “i’m your niece’s boyfriend.”
your aunt nods politely, shaking his hand. 
“hello max,” she says, visibly studying him, “what are you, a ceo? businessman? sports star?”
”auntie!” you say, shocked, cutting max off from his response. that rude bitch. although she looked relatively kind from the outside, all she really cared about anyone was their power and money. which was probably why your cousin married a mega popstar that was away half the time. like the rest of your family, money trumped true love. “you can’t just start a conversation like that!”
max shakes his head, “no, no, it’s alright. i’m an engineer.”
“ah,” your aunt says, knowingly. taking a sip of her champagne, she continues, “head engineer, huh? of what company?”
thinking he might have misheard her, max corrects her, “oh- no, not head engineer, just an engineer, like in an office.”
your great-aunt’s friendly demeanor automatically drops.
“just an engineer?” she responds, coldly.
you notice how max’s face falls the slightest bit, before he plasters a fake polite smile on his face. he shuffles uncomfortably, glancing at you, as if saying, did i say something wrong?
before you can say something rather rude to your aunt, a hand clasps your shoulder. turning around, your brother beams at you. 
“sister!” he exclaims. “i haven’t seen you in a hot sec. too busy partying in monaco, huh? or doing your silly little business things for redbull?”
he then eyes max, to which he wiggles his eyebrows at you. “who’s this, huh? your boyfriend?”
”yes,” you snap, still a little pissed from your aunt’s rude reaction. 
your brother puts his hands up jokingly, in a surrender position. “damn, okay, no need to be defensive.” 
he sticks out his hand to your boyfriend, who takes it gladly. 
“what’s up, dude,” your brother says, shaking max’s hand. “i saw you pull up with my sister in that sick aston martin valkyrie! you must have some insane connections- the waitlist for that baby is like years long.”
your aunt answers before your boyfriend can. 
“there’s no way he could have bought that car- he’s just an office engineer at some company at who knows where,” she says pointedly.
hearing this, your brother’s impressed look turns into a sneer of disdain. he steps back from max in disgust, as if he had just turned into some horrible monster. he chuckles at you.
”wow, sister, you’ve outdone yourself huh? an office engineer?”
your family, slowly becoming aware of something going on, turns towards the scene. a wide-eyed martin garrix turns off the booming music in the back.
you shove your brother further away from max, causing the glass of champagne to spill onto your brother’s designer suit. 
“what’s wrong with you?” you exclaim angrily. “at least he has a job, unlike you!”
ignoring the bubbling liquid staining his suit and your enraged expression, he turns toward max, still eyeing him with disgust. “how pathetic, leeching off of my sister’s money as a ceo? ha, you probably used her card to buy that valkyrie, didn’t you?”
next to you, stunned into silence, max’s blue eyes begin to fill with tears. 
behind you, your aunt lets out a cackle of laughter, along with a few members of the crowd.
you just about launch yourself at your brother, wanting more than anything to bash his head in.
as if it couldn’t get worse, your mother pushes through the crowd gathered around you both, and grabs your arm before you can make contact with your brother. 
“hey!” she yells, yanking you back. “what is going on here?” 
your brother grins, pointing at max. “your precious daughter went and got herself a little gold digger boyfriend- and look, he’s crying!”
you glance over to max, heart sinking. like your brother said, he had a tear running down his face, and he shook a little with embarrassment. it reminded you of a story that max once told you, how his father had often upset him as a child when he was forced to do karting. an anger flared inside of you. max had only wanted to be a good boyfriend and introduce himself to your family, but was in turn ridiculed in front of a crowd by your hypocrite brother.
your mother turns to max, then turns to you. 
“is this true, darling?” she asks, tilting her head. “does he exploit you for money?”
does max exploit you for money? you can hardly even comprehend the ridiculous sentence. you roughly yank your arm out of your mother’s grasp and march over to max. you lace your fingers through his, giving his hand a squeeze. 
you turn towards your chuckling brother. he won’t be laughing soon.
“you’re really one to talk, brother! you think you’re hot shit, with a large chunk of mother’s company stocks. well, wouldn't it be a shame if everyone knew that you are in debt from your uncontrollable gambling problem, hmm? i wonder what your wife feels about that?”
you take comfort in the way the smug smile drops from your brother’s face, now replaced with a withering glare. the silent crowd gathered around the scene lets out a gasp, in light of this news. their focus now was trained on your brother instead of max. 
“and you!” you exclaim, turning to your aunt. “since you think the word gold digger is so funny, auntie, wouldn’t you like to know how your own daughter is one, huh?” 
your aunt jerks back, not used to the crowd’s attention trained on her, along with your harsh words.
”yeah,” you continue, “if you would stop judging people based on their worth in money, you might have been able to see that all she does is spend her husband‘s money on inane things in order to ignore his multiple affairs!”
from the back of the room, you hear your cousin burst into tears while her mother, your aunt, standing in front of you, turns as red as a tomato. 
gently, you lead max towards the gilded gold front door. your family gives you judgemental looks as you make your way through the crowd. turning back one last time before you step out, you address the crowd. “don’t think any of you guys are any better. all you lot do is leech off of trust fund money!”
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max stays silent all the way to your penthouse, as do you. after a hot shower, you bundle him up in your soft fluffy blankets until he looks the puft marshmallow man. you can’t help but feel terrible. he silently shuffles towards you, which you respond by pulling his head against your chest. jimmy and sassy watch wearily from a distance on the carpet.
you are the first to cut through the silence. 
“i am so sorry that my family did that to you, maxie.” 
he doesn’t answer, but the new tears that soak your expensive silk pajama set does the answering for him. 
you run your hand through his damp strands of light brown hair, and rub his back comfortingly. 
he pulls back from your embrace to wipe his eyes briefly. 
“why do you love me?” he hiccups, cheeks wet with tears. “like- i have no money, two cats that you hate, and- and- a tiny apartment-“
“max!” you say, cutting him off from his ramblings. “listen to me.” 
you look into his watery eyes, eyelashes wet with tears.
”i really don’t care if you lived in a literal dirt hole with no job, or if you were a formula one world champion. i would love you no matter what. i love your blue eyes and your pouty lips and your lisp, and your cologne, and the bread that you bake, and your little apartment and even though it may not seem like it, i love your stupid cats too.“
he chuckles wetly at the last part of your sentence.
you kiss the top of his head.
”you don’t know how much i love you, max emillian verstappen.”
a devious grin slips onto his face. he shoots you a sultry look. 
“show me.”
and you do.
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later, when max lays asleep on the bed, love bites on his neck, face slightly flushed, and back bare, you get up to fetch your phone.
the person you seek is only a few taps away. he picks up on the second ring, politely greeting you even though it was an ungodly hour. you tell him your request, but he hesitates slightly. 
”are you sure-“
you cut your financial advisor off as politely as possible. 
“yes, that’s right. i would like to buy the entirety of my mother’s companies and my father’s estates.”
the sounds of pencil scratching paper fills your ears before your financial advisor lets out a sound of approval. 
“right away, ma’am!”
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a/n: APOLOGIES for my week-long hiatus!! take this fic as an apology... your normal spinoff series! scheduling will resume shortly <3
also let me know if you have a better name for this piece- i was STRUGGLING trying to name this one ;-;
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1K notes · View notes
aperrywilliams · 24 days ago
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Tin Wedding (Spencer Reid x ExWife!Reader)
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Author Masterlist | Event Masterlist
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Pairing: Spencer Reid x ExWife!Reader.
Summary: You've become friends with Penelope Garcia over the past year, and after much insistence from her, you agreed to visit her at her office one day. What you didn't expect was to run into your ex-husband there. And surely you didn't expect that he - Spencer Reid - is Penelope's coworker.
Word Count: 7.2k (please, stop me!)
Warnings: Yes. I set this one as +16. Mention of Reader being drunk. Curses and some strong words. Mention of sex - oral (m&f). Nothing detailed. IDFK anything about the US marriage and divorce system.
A/N: 2nd Fic for the "We are not gonna make it" writing challenge I was hosting during October with my sis @babymetaldoll. I'm so sorry for the delay, but life has crushed me these past weeks.
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The ding of the elevator signals you are already on the sixth floor. The doors open, and the first thing you see are people going and coming. It's the bustling of a lively office at noon. But this is not just any office; this is the FBI headquarters in Quantico. You never thought you would be in a place like this in your life, but here you are after your friend Penelope convinced you to visit her at work after insisting for weeks.
BAU - Behavioural Analysis Unit reads the glass doors in front of you. This is the place. Looking at the scattered desks on the open floor, you look for a clue that leads you to Penelope.
People walk past you without paying much attention. Maybe you should ask for help. But before you can decide to do so, a voice behind your back breaks you out of your thoughts.
"Can I help you?"
You know that voice. You're sure of that. But wait. It can't be—not after years of not hearing it.
You slowly turn around just to confirm that your suspicions are correct. Standing in front of you is a curious Spencer Reid, who pales when he sees your face. He remembers you, too.
"Oh God, Spencer?"
A stupid question with an obvious answer, but that doesn't take away the surprise of coming face to face with someone you never thought you'd see again in your life.
"(Y/N)? Wow..."
Time has passed, you tell yourself. Spencer looks more grown up. His hair is a little shorter, and he doesn't look so skinny anymore; it even seems there's some muscle under the white shirt he sports. Some stubble adorns his face, and dark circles can be seen under his eyes. But his beautiful eyes are the same as you remember them from when you first met in Pasadena.
"What are you doing here?" You ask, still shocked. Spencer's expression seems pretty much the same as yours.
"Uh. Well, I work here," he explains after clearing his throat.
A Caltech's genius working with the FBI? You wouldn't have expected it. But then again, you didn't expect to cross paths with him after all this time. "And what are you doing here?"
Good point. Why did you come? Oh, yes. Penelope Garcia.
"I'm here to see a friend," you mumble. Spencer's confused look changes to what? Disappointment? Of course, you're not there for him. It's stupid ever to think that, considering you haven't talked since the day you said goodbye and parted ways in that tiny apartment you shared in Pasadena.
And then an awkward silence. What are the chances that after so long, you were going to meet Spencer? And if you're wondering how long, we're talking about ten years when you were both pursuing your degrees at Caltech. In your case, it was the first one because Spencer was already in his third PhD when you met.
Before you can say something else, the one and only Penelope Garcia burst into the room, looking for you.
"There you are! Why didn't you call me when you got here?"
Totally unbeknown to the tense silence, she steps in front of you and hugs you. You can feel Spencer's confused look on you. "I'm glad you made it! We have so much to talk about."
"Garcia is your friend?" Spencer asks, gaze on you, and it's when you realize how weird the situation is. Penelope turns to him, an eyebrow furrowed.
"Of course, I'm her friend. And she came to see me," Garcia scoffs until she realizes something. "Wait a minute. For what reason would you ask that?"
Spencer clears his throat. He doesn't know what your opinion is about people knowing that fact.
"We know each other," you explain to her before asking. "How do you know Spencer?"
"No way! What a coincidence!" Garcia chirps. The exclamation raises the interest of the people entering the bullpen. Some of them approach to where you all are. "Reid? We work together!"
What were the chances of something like that happening to you, you wondered, as Spencer continued to stare at you, his eyes never leaving yours.
"What's happening here, baby girl?" A toned man asks Garcia, who can't contain her excitement.
"Oh, you wouldn't believe it," she announces as two women join the conversation.
Garcia briefly explains to the audience who you are and that she just found out that you both know Spencer, too. After the first impression, she proceeds to introduce you to those there: Derek, JJ, and Emily. From the corner of your eye, you can see Spencer downcasting his look at their curious glances at him.
"So you guys know each other?" JJ asks.
You both nod at the same time as Spencer mutters, "Caltech."
"Ah, fellow grads," JJ assumes. And in part, she is right. Indeed, you met while you were starting your master's degree and subsequent doctorate in the same area as Spencer.
"Kind of," you admit, seeing Spencer's cheeks flush and feeling yours burn too. The guy who was presented as Derek Morgan has a smirk plastered on his face.
"College sweethearts?" Morgan asks in a teasing tone. And he is kind of right, too. You lock eyes with Spencer, and you can't tell if he did or wants to say to his colleagues what you really were at that time. But before you both can even think of saying anything, Garcia's eyes widen in recognition.
"No! Wait a minute! Did you go to college together? You said the other day that you-" she starts connecting information, and you start to freak out internally. Before you can stop her, Garcia blurts. "Oh! Spencer is your ex-husband? You have to be kidding me!"
Shit. How did she figure it out so quickly? Sure, it might be your fault for sharing details about your college love life with her on a night filled with alcohol, but how could you have known she was already acquainted with him? You were careful not to mention any names or specifics, yet here you are.
"Wait, what?" Morgan's smirk turns to jaw slack in astonishment. There is no difference between JJ's and Emily's reactions. Spencer's face is flushed, and so is yours.
"Someone is going to say anything?" Emily asks, bouncing her eyes between you and Spencer.
"Uh, well—" you start, giving Spencer an apologetic look, who returns you an awkward tight-lip smile.
"Yeah. We were married," he confirms.
"When we were at college," you add.
You can feel the heaviness in the air and the mid-surprised, mid-incredulous looks from the people around you. Morgan is the first to break the silence.
"Damn it, pretty boy. What a story you had hidden from us," he says, patting Spencer's shoulder. JJ - the quietest one until now - senses how uncomfortable you and Spencer are with all the attention.
"Guys, why don't we give them a minute?"
After a moment of consideration, Emily seconds the motion. "Yeah, Morgan, would you help me with something?"
"Su- sure," Morgan agrees, still confused but following Emily nonetheless.
"But—" Penelope is still trying to understand the whole situation and has many questions she wants to ask.
"Come on, Garcia. I'm sure (Y/N) will find you when she is ready," JJ encourages, looking at you. That's when you get out of your daze and nod.
"Yes. Yeah. I'll text you, Penelope."
And just like that, the same way people surrounded you just seconds ago, now it's just you, Spencer, and an awkward silence.
"I'm sorry. I didn't know you worked here. I didn't know you were Penelope's coworker, and—" you start to apologize.
"No. Don't. It's not your fault," Spencer rushes to speak.
"I shouldn't have told her about - about," you trail off.
"About you having an ex-husband?" Spencer supplies, and you shyly nod.
"Believe me, it's not a thing I tell everyone I meet, but Penelope, well, she-" you try to find the right words. Spencer nods in understanding.
"Yeah, she can be pretty convincing when she wants to know something."
Another halo of silence passes between you until it's Spencer who breaks it this time.
"So, how have you been? I mean, it's been a while." You nod, still uncomfortable with the situation but just as curious as you assume Spencer is.
"Yeah, it's been a while," you confirm. "Good, all good on my end. Working and living. What about you?"
"Me? Good. Working here at the BAU."
"Cool."
Cool? What does that mean?
A sharp 'Reid' is heard from behind you both, making you turn to the source. A well-dressed man with a serious gaze is looking at Spencer from an office threshold. "Can you come, please?" the man adds. Spencer nods quickly. "Sure. I'll be there in a second, Hotch." The answer seems to satisfy the man, so he nods and returns inside.
Spencer turns to you again. "Uh. I - uh-" he stutters, motioning where the man called Hotch was a second ago.
"Yeah. I have to go, too." You have to, actually, but you don't think you can face Penelope or anyone else right now, for that matter. "It was nice to see you." As you are about to run away subtly, Spencer calls your name. Stopping in your tracks, you turn, and your eyes make contact with his again.
"Would you - uh. Would you like to grab a coffee with me sometime?"
It catches you off guard, but you only assume he's being polite. You think you should return the gesture.
"Sure. Why not," you say, giving him a little smile. "Now I have to go. Bye, Spencer."
And with that, you resume your escape to the elevator.
----------
From the moment he saw you at the BAU, Spencer has never been the same. He never imagined he would see you again, especially under those circumstances. Spencer was so astonished he wasn't even able to start a decent conversation or even ask for your number after inviting you to a coffee.
Also distressed about the interrogation he knew his colleagues would subject to him, Spencer wanders through the BAU halls as if he were not in the present. And, in fact, he is not. After seeing you, he has only been able to think about you and the years you both spent in Pasadena.
A smile tugs the corners of his mouth every time one of those memories comes to him.
"Okay, pretty boy, spill," Derek prompts when he sees Spencer in the kitchen two days after your encounter.
"Uh? What are you talking about?" he turns, confused, to see Derek looking at him with a frown and arms over his chest.
"Come on! You know what I'm talking about. About the pretty lady, Garcia's friend, who happens to be your ex-wife?"
Spencer huffs through his nostrils.
"I already told you. We met in college, and we were together until we graduated," Spencer says nonchalantly as if it's normal. He tries, at least. Morgan scoffs at his attempt.
"Reid. You married her. You just can't tell me you 'were together' as you're talking about any other relationship. She was important; what happened?"
Morgan remembers well a few years ago when Spencer told him about a great love he had while at Caltech and how, from time to time, those memories would come to plague his head. It wasn't hard for Morgan to connect the dots and assume you were the person Spencer was referring to.
Spencer sighs thoughtfully. "We ended it by mutual agreement. We both knew our career paths were going to be incompatible, and we both had so many dreams to fulfill. Our greatest act of love was letting each other go. At least that's how I saw it for a long time."
"But you regretted it at some point," Morgan adds, and Spencer nods. "Why didn't you try to find her then?"
"I didn't want to be selfish. What if she already had her life going perfectly, and I was just going to show like a kicked puppy? It wasn't fair for her."
"Man, I get it, but what about now? You found each other again. Can it be a kind of sign or something." Spencer glances at Derek with an incredulous look.
"Are you listening to yourself? You sound like Garcia," Spencer grumbles, making Derek laugh.
"Yeah. Definitely, it's something my baby girl would say. But, truly speaking, Reid, why not take a chance?"
Spencer huffs in frustration. "I - I don't know anything about her in these years! I didn't even ask for her number that day. I was frozen on the spot!"
"And that will stop you?"
A satisfactory smirk appears on Derek's face when Spencer stays silent, contemplating his options.
---------
Not wanting to talk about the encounter with anyone, you write to Penelope, apologizing for having to leave suddenly that day. She responds everything is fine and doesn't even ask you why, to which you are tremendously grateful.
But as the days pass by, you know you have to talk to her at some point, so you invite her to come over one afternoon.
You have been thinking a lot and rationalizing everything that happened. Of course, there was always a possibility of crossing paths with Spencer someday, but turning it into reality is different. So you conclude all your nerves were out of the shock of something unprovable happening, not because seeing Spencer after ten years made you fall off your balance.
With that in mind, you were ready to talk to Penelope.
Once she gets to your apartment, you first apologize for leaving that day and explain how you got frozen after the unexpected encounter. Garcia tells you not to worry and even says she is sorry for telling everyone about her discovery without any filter.
"It's just- I was so impressed. I couldn't help it!" she explains, and you nod in understanding.
"It's okay. I guess no one expected something like that."
"Right? But I have to ask. How did Spencer Reid become your husband? I mean, you told me about your ex-husband and all, but I'm sorry, I can't picture Spencer even talking to a girl without stuttering, less asking for marriage, and then divorcing? It's beyond me."
It catches your attention how she talks about him. Although you met Spencer when you both were very young, knowing how shy he was, over time, you managed to beat his barrier and meet a wonderful man full of charisma and not so sheepish after all. Has he never shown that side to anyone else in all these years?
"Why so much interest in my marriage? It's been a decade," you ask Penelope, and her scoff sounds a mix of obvious and disbelief.
"Honey, it's unbelievable Doctor Loving Reid has kept THAT information to himself for so long. So now that it is out, it does pick my full interest. Spill. What happened?"
You shrug your shoulder. "It's like I said the first time I told you. We were young, a whole life ahead. Neither he nor I wanted to cut each other's wings."
"But you loved each other!" Penelope complains with an adorable pout. You have known this woman for what? Less than a year? And she seems brokenhearted about something that happened to you and Spencer ten years ago. She's right, though. You and Spencer were mad in love. Unlike what people have believed for years, your marriage was not a result of a wild night of alcohol and passion in Pasadena. You were both quite sober when you went to court that day. Both even had written down the vows you professed in front of the judge- yours on a piece of paper and Spencer in his brain, of course.
"If it's any consolation, the year we were married, we were very happy," you tell her, fondly remembering that time. Garcia rolls her eyes.
"Well, exactly that's what I mean, miss. If you were so happy, why end it like that?"
The only answer you can think of is 'it's complicated,' but that will surely increase her curiosity.
"We wanted the best for each other, even if it meant being apart. As good rational beings, we weighed our options, and the sensible thing to do was to end it."
Putting it in that way, Penelope can believe it. Having known Spencer for years, she knows for a fact his big brain is capable of analyzing every probability of every possible outcome. What seems incredible to her is how feelings - how love - can be rationalized like this.
A ding from your phone pauses your talk with Penelope. You glance at the device and see a text from an unknown caller.
'Hi. I'm Spencer. I stupidly didn't ask you for your number, so after cursing myself for the past few days, I had to find it out. Don't get mad, please. I would really like to grab a coffee with you if you are up to it. If you don't want to, I understand. And if you don't want me to contact you again, just say the words, and I'll stop. But I really hope you say yes. SR.'
Okay. This is unexpected. Indeed, you remember not having exchanged numbers with Spencer, and you didn't give it much thought either, assuming his invitation had been out of pure kindness. But here you are, reading the message and feeling an emotion you can't describe. Nostalgia, maybe?
You narrow your eyes to Garcia, who immediately suspects who sent you a text.
"Before you ask, I didn't give him your number!" she defends as you breathe a deep sigh.
"He's asking me out for coffee," you tell Garcia, and she can't help but squeal.
"Will you say yes?"
"I don't know. Is it a good idea to get back in touch after all these years?" you muse more for yourself than her.
"Honey, only you know what's best for you, but if you ask me, I remember you telling me after you both split up, you were left with a lot of 'what ifs' in your head, and some of them are still floating around. Maybe this could help clear them up once and for all."
Penelope has a point. But now, you have a dilemma in the form of a coffee invitation.
---------
It's just a coffee. Don't overthink it.
You have been telling yourself that for a while as you walk to the coffee shop where you agreed to meet Spencer today.
He is just being nice.
Sure, after ten years of no contact, this sudden encounter in the FBI - with all his colleagues there - maybe pressured him to invite you to grab a coffee.
Still lost in your thoughts, you don't realize you are already there. After taking a deep breath, you step inside and look around. You spot him in a booth in the corner, back to you. A smile tugs at your lips, remembering all the coffee dates you both had back then. It was your thing. Hours and hours talking about everything and anything until the owner asked you to leave because they needed to close.
"Hey," you greet, making Spencer look up to you.
"Hi," he returns, a smile plastered on his face. "Thanks for accepting my invitation," he gestures for you to sit.
"Sure. Why I wouldn't?" After taking off your coat, you sit in front of him in the booth.
"Yeah. I mean, we haven't talked in ten years. And then we see each other at my work, and- well, it's kind of weird, I guess?"
Weird is an understatement, you think.
"You are right. Kind of it is."
You notice there are two coffee cups on the table. Spencer follows your line of sight.
"Uh- I had ordered already," he points to the coffee in front of you. "I don't know if you have changed your order, though."
"Thanks," you mumble appreciatively. "I haven't changed it, actually."
"Great!"
You try to gauge his expression. Is he nervous? Anxious? Because you are.
"Spencer, if you are uncomfortable, we can just go home. There is no—" You can't finish the sentence before Spencer cuts you off.
"No. No, I'm not. Please, don't think that."
"Okay," you concede. "I won't. But you need to be honest with me, okay?"
"Of course," Spencer agrees.
"You felt obligated to invite me here after what happened?" You bluntly ask, and Spencer's eyes widen.
"What? No, of course not," Spencer immediately denies. "I really wanted to see you. It's just that-" he hesitates. You tilt your head, waiting for him to continue. "I just didn't know if it was right, you know? I mean, we never reach out, and then it happens. We never agreed-" he trails off. And you know exactly what he's talking about.
Back then, when you decided to go separate ways, Spencer asked you what would happen if you met again in the future, and you shook your head, saying it probably wouldn't happen. So yes, you never talked about the possibility, and Spencer understood he should never contact you, and so did you.
"I know. We didn't," you recognize, regret slipping in your voice. "I guess I didn't want to think about the possibility back then."
You two know there are things you left out and left unsaid the last night you were together in Pasadena, but you don't think it's a good idea to say them now—not when this is supposed to be a friendly reunion between exes.
"So, since when have you been working in DC?" Spencer asks after you tell him about your work career on the west side.
"Almost two years," you admit.
Two years living in the same city. Spencer wonders if Garcia hadn't met you, he would have ever seen you again.
Your professional career has certainly been prolific; Spencer can tell after the stories you have been recounting. Years of experience and important jobs, just as you had dreamed when you were in college. These are the same dreams you shared with Spencer during the nights of studying and those where there was everything else but studying.
"I thought you were going to pursue academics. When did the FBI happen?" you ask after saying it's enough of talking about yourself.
"I thought that too. And I did it for a while. Then I met Gideon. He - uh, he showed me what the BAU had been doing, and I knew it was my place to be."
Spencer fondly tells you about his early years working as a profiler and how much he has learned. It seems that, like you, he has found his professional calling.
Two hours and three coffees later, you are both laughing about the weird and funny things you have seen in the past years. It feels good, and much of the initial nervousness has dissipated. But there is one topic you both have actively avoided: romantic relationships.
You are curious about it, and Spencer is, too, but neither of you wants to be the one to mention it first. Spencer is who breaks first.
"Are we going to talk about - about that? I feel we have been dancing about the topic, but I don't know if you want to."
You can't help but snort out of being caught and for the subject itself. You are sure your almost nonexistent love life is enough to make anyone cry or laugh.
"I'm still that obvious?"
"You have your tells," Spencer shrugs. You raise an eyebrow.
"I have my tells? What about you, doctor? You have been bouncing your leg the same way you did the day you defended your engineering PhD dissertation."
Spencer's eyes widen. "You still remember that?"
The insinuation of you forgetting that day makes you scoff.
"Of course I do! I tried everything to try to calm your nerves. Do you remember what I did, and actually, it worked?" Spencer's cheeks redden because he remembers.
You won't tell the details, but you recall, as clear as the day, how you helped him to 'decompress.'
"Okay, okay. Guilty as charged."
"So, what do you want to know?" You ask, still not fully ready but resigned, leaning back in your seat and crossing your arms over your chest.
"Are you with someone?" Spencer asks, and you gasp, feigning surprise.
"No beating around the bushes, uh?"
Spencer's cheeks flush, and he can't help it. "If it's out the line, you don't need to answer."
Seeing him flustered and biting his lower lip makes your heart do flip-flops. It's something you haven't felt in a long time—ten years, to be exact.
"If you had asked me a month ago, I should have said yes."
Indeed, you had a boyfriend until a month ago when his insistence on moving in with you was too much to handle, and his frustrated self decided to say a lot of awful things when you said no to him.
Some people would say you have commitment issues, and maybe you have. But in all honesty, until this day, there is no one you have felt secure enough to take that step.
It's ironic, considering you already have a marriage under your belt.
"I'm sorry," Spencer mumbles.
"No. Don't be. It wasn't meant to be."
'Like I used to think about us,' you want to add, but you refrain. Instead, you explain in not much detail every failed relationship you have had. Spencer listens intently, his heart aching to think of how a part of you might have been broken with each failed relationship. He hasn't done any better, though.
"And that's all. As you can see, there is nothing too exciting to remark," you chuckle to lighten the mood. "Tell me about you. There is a Mrs. Reid waiting at home?"
Spencer snorts, shaking his head. "No. There's no Mrs. Reid. The only one who has held the title has been you," he says with a look that makes your breath hitch in your throat. What is it? Longing?
"Wow. I feel honored," you tease, trying to hide the heat rising to your cheeks.
Spencer tells you about the few relationships he's had over the years. In his own opinion, none of them are very meaningful. When you ask him why, he doesn't hesitate to answer. "This job not only consumes my time, but also a lot of me as a person. Not everyone understands that."
He would like to say no one has ever been so important as to make him doubt continuing to work in what he does. The only person who ever made him doubt was you. But instead of saying it, he prefers to end with a "I guess that's why no one has stayed."
Listening to him talk is like listening to yourself, trying to minimize the fact that professional success is possibly one of the main reasons why other parts of your personal life have never flourished.
It was your choice. You both decided to make it that way. But sometimes you wonder if...
"Do you think we made a mistake?"
Spencer's question gets you out of your thoughts.
You look at him, baffled. "What?"
"Do you think we shouldn't have broken up? That I shouldn't have left?"
You pondered his question for a second. It has to do with how you felt at that time? Or does it have to do with how you felt after or even now?
"Honestly? I don't know, Spencer." A resigned sigh leaves your lips. "I always wanted to think it was the right thing to do."
"You never regretted it?" He asks you, and you shrug, not knowing much to say. Instead, you opt to ask him the question back.
"Did you?"
"Yeah. I did," he admits. "Sometimes I still do."
A heavy silence settles between you. The admission that you both had doubts about the drastic decision you made almost ten years ago is difficult to take. It unfurls a whole new set of questions whose answers you are not sure you are ready to hear or say. But it's only fair he knows your truth as you know his now.
"For what is worth, me too. I regret it. More often than I would like to admit."
Spencer's heart starts to beat faster; breath hitches in his throat for a second.
He tentatively reaches out to rest his hand on yours. You watch the action and think you know what it means. His eyes are hopeful. Something you'd like to mirror in your own, but the uncertainty is there, and you can't help it.
"Spencer, no. Please, don't." You try to articulate but not take your hand away from his. "I wish I could tell you I'm willing to try- to try to make up for lost time, but I can't. Even though it may not seem like it, we're strangers to each other, and I'm not in a place to even think about- you know."
Spencer gives a little squeeze to your hand, nodding.
"I know. And I'm not asking you for us to redo our story and start from where we ended. No. But I would love to get to know you again and be your friend."
"Friends?" You ask, brows furrowed. He smiles.
"Yeah. First and foremost, you were always my best friend. My person. Even if we never get back together as a couple, and we don't have to, I don't want to lose you again."
You take a moment to think about his words. What would be the harm? You're at a stage in your life where you don't want to live thinking about those things you wish you had done and didn't. The things you might have done differently. Why not put reason aside for a moment and just be?
You squeeze his hand back, a sign of yes; you're willing to get to know the Spencer in front of you.
---------
Three months have passed since your conversation with Spencer at the coffee shop. You both agreed to reconnect as friends, which has led to many coffee meetings, lunches, dinners, movie nights, and walks in the park. And to say your heart feels full and happy would be an understatement. You've realized how much of the Spencer you met in Pasadena still exists, and the connection that once brought you together has revitalized and is stronger than ever.
Neither of you has wanted to rush things, and so far, you're both happy to be able to spend time together.
Spencer has also opened the door for you to the BAU team, which has been his family for eight years now. In addition to the bond you already had with Penelope, you now regularly attend the girls' night she hosts with JJ and Emily. You've also gotten to know Derek and Hotch better and understand why Spencer considers them like his older brother and father figure, respectively. You've also become a favorite of David Rossi, who doesn't take no for an answer every time he invites you to one of his dinners.
Like tonight, where you find yourself vividly chatting with the girls in a corner of Rossi's backyard.
"No way I could have passed Dynamics and Mechanics without Spencer," you acknowledge when you're talking about the most challenging subjects you had in college.
"It seems a very interesting topic," Emily jokes, not knowing what the hell you were talking about.
You giggle at the memory, cheeks turning a shade of pink.
"I still remember those afternoons Spencer spent trying to help me memorize the Euler–Lagrange equations and the Hamilton's principle. He made it interesting, if you know what I mean," you wink at them.
"I don't think I want to know," JJ muses. Emily snorts at the suggestion.
"Oh, I definitely want to know what that means," Penelope pipes. You chuckle.
"One night, he made me recite the whole equations with his head buried between my thighs," you confess with a mischievous look.
"Oh my God!" Garcia's jaw goes slack, and Emily's eyes widen in disbelief.
"You fucking kidding me!"
"Definitely, I didn't want to know that," JJ shakes her head.
"Well, I helped him with Applied Computer Science. He had to produce a code to operate a string of relational databases while I was on my knees su-"
"Okay! I get it!" Garcia cuts you off, with her hands in the air, as Emily laughs and JJ groans.
"You asked," you shrug, a smirk on your lips.
"Okay, okay. But hear me out. Since we are talking about college time, and honestly speaking, we all have had someone in college, more or less important, with whom to study or do other things," Emily prefaces, making you giggle. "But from that, to marry, and one year later to divorce? How do you get over something so intense like that?"
You have questioned yourself the same for years.
Looking past JJ's shoulder, you see Spencer talking with Morgan, beer in hand, and you can't help but feel the smile creeping on your face when he looks back and winks at you.
If anything, the past months have made you realize what you had back then with him was unique. But what you're having now? It is as unique as before and better.
"I don't think you get over it. And it's okay; you learn to appreciate it and value the chances life gives you after."
The girls follow your line of sight and share a knowing look. When they see Spencer approaching the group, they collectively decide to go inside the house for a new drink.
"All yours," Garcia whispers to Spencer before going in a bee-line with Emily and JJ.
"What was that?" Spencer asks you with a quirked eyebrow when the girls are out of sight.
You look at him, pretending not to understand.
"I assume they wanted a refill," you say with a shrug. Spencer nods and smiles at you.
"And you don't? Do you want me to get you something?"
"No. I'm fine," you respond to his offer. "Besides, I think I've got my alcohol ration filled for the night."
"If you're done for the night, I can take you home if you want."
That's the Spencer you know, always concerned about your well-being and comfort. You shake your head.
"Not yet. Walk with me, though?" You ask, extending your hand for him to take. Without questioning reasons, Spencer nods and takes your hand. The two of you begin to walk towards the pool area, where the sound of the music coming from the house is less audible.
It's not unusual for you to hold hands now. You trust each other, and it's been an innocent way of showing affection. And while the tension of something more has been building, neither of you has wanted to take the next step yet.
When you stop in the pool deck, Spencer moves to stand in front of you, his free hand reaching to tilt your chin with his index so he can inspect your face for some kind of clue.
"Are you okay?"
You nod as your fingers, from your joined hands, absently play with his. A thorough smile tugs the corners of your mouth. Your eyes admiring Spencer's honey ones in the moonlight.
"More than okay," you admit. But Spencer knows there is more in your mind you're not saying.
"Yeah?"
"Yep." You're stretching this on purpose. A smirk plays on your face. Spencer knows what you are doing.
"Good." His voice is amused. This game was one you both used to play back then, testing each other's curiosity and seeing how long it took the other to demand an answer about what the other was thinking. Usually, you were the one who won since Spencer couldn't stand not knowing.
"Have you grown patient over the years, Dr. Reid?" You ask, entertained. Spencer's laughter fills you with a feeling you thought was dormant inside you, but he has managed to refloat.
Not wanting to prolong his torture, and because you don't have it in you to hold back any longer, you decide to speak.
"I know you remember, but can you tell me the first thing I said to you the day I met you?"
Spencer's eyes narrow in search of the moment you're referring to.
-
You were in the library, busily searching through the shelves for a book you couldn't find. Spencer could see the stress radiating off of you. After watching you for a few seconds, he decided to walk over to the shelf, and leaning down, he pulled a book from the top shelf before presenting it to you. "Maybe this is the one you're looking for?" And he was right. Your first thought was, 'How did I not see it before?' and then you realized the weirdest thing of all, 'how did he know which was the book you were looking for?' You didn't know the guy, and as far as you knew, he didn't know you either.
Seeing your confusion, he proceeded to explain. "It was an educated guess, seeing as you have Fuller's, Richmond's, and Helbert's there. I assumed you were in Thermodynamics 301 and didn't have Priest's."
-
Spencer laughs before trying to imitate your voice. "Can I buy you a coffee in appreciation and keep you in my purse for future reference?" You nod, smiling.
"Bold of me for asking that to a stranger, uh?"
"Bold of you for thinking I would ever refuse," Spencer says in a mocking tone to match your joke. You both share a fit of laughter. Once it subsides, your eyes fix on him.
"Bold of me to think I wouldn't fall in love with you after all these years." Your words hit Spencer, whose expression changes from light to serious in a second.
"What?"
"It's like they say. At some point, something has to give. And this is my moment." You pause before continuing. "I can't say I'm sure what's coming, because I'm not. I also don't know if what you've seen of me these past few months is worth enough for you to love me again. But there's one thing I do know. I love you. I loved you, I missed you, and now I've loved you again."
Spencer is speechless. His brain tries to piece together each word you say. You take both his hands in yours, and you can feel them tremble.
"If you'll have me, I want to be the one that stays," you add, hoping your words are good enough to convey your emotions.
You don't know when tears start running down your cheeks. It might be when you see Spencer's glassy eyes.
"I do love you. And I want you to be the one who stays," he rasps before releasing your hands to cup your cheeks with his own, leaning down to whisper, "Let me be the person you want to stay for."
"You already are," you whisper back before closing the distance between you, allowing your lips to meet in a tender, sweet kiss. A new promise and a new beginning for two souls that were meant to be. Thanks to fate, or maybe not. That doesn't matter anymore.
-
As you kiss, part, whisper sweet nothings to each other, and kiss again, not so far away, are two people watching the scene with satisfied looks on their faces.
"Do you see that, Hot Stuff?" Garcia asks Morgan. A smirk appears on his face.
"Yeah, mama. I see it, clear as the day."
"We did it!" Penelope cheers, whisper-yelling, making Morgan chuckle.
"I should never have doubted you, baby girl," the man says, kissing her cheek.
"Of course not. But I forgive you only because I'm so happy our plan worked wonderfully."
-----------
SIX MONTHS EARLIER
Penelope Garcia's curiosity always gets the best of her. She has gotten to know you better in the past months since the IA convention where you met. She sees you as a beautiful person and a good friend. So when you told her on a night full of alcohol about your ex-husband and how important your relationship was for you, Penelope couldn't shake the feeling of wanting to know more, so maybe she could do something to help. Do what? She didn't know, but maybe more information about it would give her an idea.
Quickly typing on her keyboard, she finds a Pasadena Marriage License with your name on it. Checking the date, Garcia notes you had married in the summer before your senior year. It was expected. You already told her that.
What was unexpected, though, was finding out who the person you had married was. Garcia had to read the name twice before realizing the huge discovery she had just made: Spencer Walter Reid.
'No way! It has to be a mistake,' she squealed, fast-reading the information on the papers. No, there wasn't any mistake. You married Spencer Reid almost ten years ago. The same Spencer Reid she has known for so long and works with her every day.
But wait. You had said, ex-husband. Where are the divorce papers?
Typing again, she finds a divorce request signed by you and Spencer a year after you married. So that is true, too.
Overwhelmed by everything she has just discovered, Garcia is about to close the web tabs with all this data when something pops up: it's a court resolution dated six months after the divorce request. The resolution reads that the request has been denied because one of the parts couldn't be notified for comparison to the Pasadena tribunal. Garcia narrows her eyes and types again, looking for an updated legal document granting the divorce request. She finds none.
'Double holy fucking shit! They are still married!'
Without knowing what to do with this new information, she starts pacing frantically in the office. Garcia knows that the information she found wasn't for her to know, but at the same time, how does it not you or Spencer know this? She can't tell you, but she should, or maybe not. Grabbing her phone, she dials the only person she knows will help her with the dilemma.
"Derek Morgan. I need your delicious ass in my office right now!"
And just like that, a plan emerged. A plan to give a little push to destiny. A little push to you and Spencer cross paths again. Maybe this time, for good.
-----------
"And when are you going to tell them about their failed divorce?" Morgan asks Garcia, who is still looking at the couple giggling and kissing.
"Oh, shush. Let them enjoy tonight. There will be time for that."
Derek Morgan shakes his head, laughing. "Okay. You're the boss, mama. You're the boss."
---------------
Spencer Reid's Taglist: @dreatine @nomajdetective @jayyeahthatsme @rosalinasam2 @averyhotchner @lovelyxtom @princessmiaelicia @pastelbabygirl19 @reidsbookclub @alexxavicry @gspenc @spencerreidisbae123 @calmspencer @pauline5525mgg @anamiad00msday @milivanili99 @laylasbunbunny @leahblackk @miaxx03 @missabsey @taintedstranger @khxna @hiireadstuff @pleasantwitchgarden @dysphoricsanity @themoonchildwhofell @silver138 @lovelybaka @shinytinywhispers
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januaryembrs · 6 months ago
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i love your sunshine!reader x specer fics so much and ngl it's one of the best spencer fics i've ever read. i was wondering how the team would react to them dating? did anyone ever suspect that there was something going on between them or were they completely clueless??
PDA | Spencer Reid x Sunshine!Reader
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description: Sunshine reader is worried about telling Unit Chief Prentiss about their budding relationship, despite Spencer telling her she's being dramatic.
length: 1.8k
warnings: fluff, TINY BIT OF HOTCHNISS BECAUSE I AM STILL MAD ABOUT THEIR SCENE AT JJ'S WEDDING I have never been blue ballsed so hard.
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“Sweetheart, I think you need to calm down,” Spencer’s voice was calm and soothing, as was his hand that skirted down her arm to take hers in his own. Her palm was warm, the tiniest bit clammy as he meshed their fingers together, and stroked over the back of her knuckles with his thumb, “It’s only Emily,” 
“I know, I know, it’s just,” She conceded, and she smushed her face into his chest as a last ditch effort to revel in his affection before they had to go back to remaining professional, the elevator quickly approaching the sixth floor, “I feel like we’re breaking the rules. Are you positive it said nothing in the papers about workplace relationships?” 
“I would stake my life on it, believe me. Me and page fifty nine, sub section five, clause three are tight as can be,” Spencer reassured, after he had spent a good seven minutes reading through their entire contract, front and back, in an attempt to make her feel better because she knew she couldn’t keep a secret if her life depended on it, even more so couldn’t keep her hands and lips off Spencer for such an extended amount of time now she’d had him.
He watched the illuminated digits flick from four to five, and he yielded his restraint just the tiniest bit, knowing they might not get a chance to love on eachother so unapologetically until the work day was over. Spencer brought his hand that wasn’t wound tightly in her own around her shoulders, squeezing her to him with a pressed kiss to her forehead, the gesture full of eight hours worth of affections. 
Five turned to six just a little too fast for his liking and he was forced to let go of her as the doors slid open, trying to ignore the saddened expression on her face as they parted, the way her lips turned into a pout like a kicked puppy. 
“Good morning, my angels!” Penelope chirped, a sweet coffee with a buttload of creamer swirling around her octopus mug as she headed for her office, walking right past the two agents who looked like they’d forgotten how to behave normally. 
“Morning, Penelope,” She sang back, smiling at the woman who hummed as she walked, a skip in her step, yet the second the tech analyst entered her lair, the younger slapped a hand on Spencer’s arm, turning to him with wide eyes, “Oh my god, she knew!” 
He chuckled, shaking his head and resting a hand on her lower back, leading her to the bullpen as she fretted, “Relax, she did not know. And even if she did, we’re not doing anything wrong,” He cooed, thankful that the floor was empty besides Emily where she poked around her office, moving some folders between her desk and cabinet, “Derek dated pretty much every woman on the second floor within the first term of me being here, Penelope dated Kevin from Internal Affairs for years,” 
“But that’s, like, between floors, between departments. There’s no way they can get distracted if there’s a whole bunch of concrete and carpet between them,” She explained, and the two of them headed for their joint desk so they could set their bags down, “When I look at you, I get side tracked thinking about your beautiful hair and your stupidly handsome face and kissing you and-” She puffed her cheeks out, flustered already. 
“That sounds really difficult for you, I don’t know how you ever get anything done.” Spencer said with an indulging smile, because his favourite thing might just be humouring her. Besides kissing her and everything that came with it ofcourse.
“It’s a struggle, I’ll tell you now,” She said, almost unaware he wasn’t being serious as she looked at him finally, the glint in his eyes he got when he was teasing her, “It is. I nearly tipped coffee over my lap yesterday because you fixed your hair, it’s infuriating.”
He smiled, fighting every urge in him that wanted to pull her back into his chest and kiss her face a dozen times, because he knew she wasn’t joking when she said she was worried about breaking the rules. He knew Emily would be fine with them dating, they’d all turned a blind eye to the clear tension and lingering glances that had gone between her and Hotch for years, but he hated seeing her so frazzled, so he complied with her strict no PDA rule. 
He would just have to give it to her twice over later, when they were alone, and the thought of it excited him already. 
“Alright, alright, let’s do this. Am I speaking or are you speaking?” She asked, rubbing her sweating hands over her legs, and he shrugged. 
“I’ll do the talking, will you just do something for me,” He said, his voice calm and collected as he took the stairs, her footsteps nervously trailing behind him. 
“Sure, anything,” She said, looking up at him with wide eyes where he stood a whole step above her. 
“Take a deep breath,” He reminded her, grinning when he heard her pause and do as he’d said, because this was just Emily. 
“I’m sorry,” She mumbled, meeting him at the top of the landing, where he waited by the office door, watching her with gentle eyes, “I just really don’t want to mess anything up, least of all with you,” 
He quickly tucked a slither of hair behind her ear in guilty pleasure, “You’re not messing anything up, I promise.” He murmured, his cadence low and calming because she already seemed worked up and they hadn’t even opened the door, “You ready?” 
She nodded after another deep breath, and he knocked on the door with those boney knuckles of his. 
Barely waiting for Emily to invite them in, he strode into the office, her trailing behind him like she was waiting for a scolding, and Spencer simply cleared his throat. 
“Everything okay?” Emily asked, her dark eyes scanning between the two of them, a look of concern flitting over her face, “Why do you guys have a weird look on your face? Did you chip Penelope’s mug again? Was it the good one? Oh man, she’ll kill you, that was her favourite-”
The rookie shook her head, and before she could breath and regulate like Spencer had been trying to tell her it happened; the word vomit she’d been shoving down for fifteen days, “We’re dating! We’re seeing each other together, I mean were seeing together, I mean wait, hang on-” 
Spencer put a hand on her shoulder to hush her, and she stopped then and there, sensing he could take over for her, because she’d quickly realised she was not one to handle pressure. 
“What she means to say is we’re dating, and according to page fifty nine, sub section five, clause three of our contract, workplace relations are acceptable as long as they aren’t hindrance to either the team or the work, so,” Spencer tucked his hand into his pocket, the other still gentle as it stroked her back soothingly, “Is that okay?” 
Emily shrugged, her lips twitching to hide the broad smile that begged to be released. 
“That seems reasonable to me,” She said politely, looking to where the rookie seemed to have found her words. 
“Th-that’s it, we’re not in trouble?” She asked on bated breath, her brows furrowed and confused. 
“Look, are you guys happy?” She nodded vehemently immediately, and Emily threw her hands up, “Then, there you go. As long as there’s no funny business in the office, it’s none of my concern,”
“Funny business?” She asked, and Spencer ran a hand over her braid she’d twisted into running down the back of her head, a small smile tugging at his lips, as he and Emily exchanged a look.
“No bang bang on company time,” Emily said plainly, ignoring the way the girl stiffened, her face hot and embarrassed as she shook her head. 
“Never, no, never. Never ever,” She spluttered, and Spencer took it as his signal to get her some space, “None of that ever, Emily, you don’t have to worry-”
“Who broke the rookie?” Tara asked, entering Emily’s office with a stack of folders in her arms, her eyes quickly zeroing in on the way Reid’s arm wrapped around her waist, and she turned to Emily with a knowing smirk, “You owe me ten bucks, Prentiss,” 
“Hold on, you guys bet on us?” Spencer asked, his expression dropping because he’d thought that the two of them had been subtle the past few weeks, even if his sweet girlfriend looked like she was keeping bees in her mouth every time there was a pause, like the secret had been begging to come out any second it got. 
Emily seemed guilty, though perhaps scathed would be a better term as she fished a bill out of her purse and handed it to Tara. 
“JJ owes forty, so I’m not too torn up about it,” She replied, catching JJ’s bluebell hues as she swanned past the office window, her eyes narrowing on the way the youngest agent was all but pressed into Spencer’s ribcage, the two of them looking like they wanted the ground to swallow them whole. 
Her face morphed into chagrin, “Two more weeks, and I would have been up by sixty bucks, you guys,” She bit at the happy couple, turning on her heel to where Luke was sipping coffee at his desk, clueless to the meeting they were having in Emily’s office, “Alvez, cough up. They told Emily already,” 
There was some sound of indignation from the desks below as Luke rummaged through his wallet, and Tara looked like that cat that got the cream as the wads of dollar bills made their way to her. 
“This is gross misconduct of workplace trust,” Spencer said, his lips pursed into something annoyed, and he could feel the way her face burnt with embarrassment without even having to look at her, “Alright, we are going out to get coffee, since we’re the only ones who know how to handle things like adults,” 
He led her out with a tight, protective grip, shielding her mortified expression from the rest of the office as they got back into the elevator, and he damned himself when he let her hug into his chest again, though this time it was to hide her humiliation in his shirt. 
“It’s okay, at least it’s out there now. No more secrets,” He comforted, and she nodded silently, her cheeks still on fire where the shame weaselled its way out of her face, “And, hey, it’s not like they can go on forever. They’ll have to give up some time,”
The group watched the doors close behind them, Luke immediately turning to the three women with an impish look in his eye, “Twenty says they’ll engage within a year,” Tara scoffed, waving her money in his face as Emily rooted around for more money, “You’re on, I give it eight months,”
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dreamcubed · 1 year ago
Text
i think he knows | theodore nott x reader
song; i think he knows [taylor swift] pairing; theodore nott x ravenclaw!fem!reader genre; not actually unrequited love, s2l, fluff word count; 3,1k timeline; half-blood prince warnings; swearing, theo's lack of communication summary; you had fancied the mysteriously quiet slytherin boy for as long as you could remember (since first year), and, quite frankly, your best friend was sick of you going on about it without ever making a move
masterlist
"wanna see what's under that attitude."
—————————————
Truth was, you knew you weren't special for having your attention caught by Theodore Nott. Despite his almost entirely anti-social personality and apparent grumpiness, many girls longed after him. You completely understood, of course; there was something enticing about a potentially misunderstood quiet boy, and the idea of becoming the one person they show affection to was self-indulging.
The fact of the matter, as your best friend, Cho, frequently pointed out, was that you had never even so much as spoken to him. You hoped he at least knew you existed, from the times you had been praised in class for your assignments, but you had no proof that he even recognised your face.
"Babe, it's sixth year now- that's over five years of you fancying Nott," Cho said as she caught your gaze lingering over to the Slytherin table again. It was your second day back after summer, so you had a lot of long-distance admiring to catch up on.
"Okay, so?" you replied, not even bothering to move your eyes away from the object of your desires.
"So, it's time that you do something about it," she continued, shovelling scrambled eggs on to both her plate and yours, "Do you really want to leave Hogwarts without any dating experience?"
You finally prized your eyes away from Nott, opting instead to meet your concerned best friend's gaze, "I don't think it's the sort of time to be thinking about dating."
"It's especially the time to think about it," she said, "Our lives may be shorter than we think they are - don't die with regrets."
You sighed, unable to argue.
"Plus, it really wouldn't hurt to have some positivity around here. You can feel how much heavier the air is than before."
That, you had to agree with. People were still laughing in their friend groups throughout the hall, sure, but there was a lingering sense of dread that had stuck with everyone since the Triwizard Tournament and reign of Umbridge, and it was only getting worse.
"Maybe," you finally concluded, picking up your fork to dig into your breakfast.
"You have nothing to lose," she added, "Your social circles are completely separate, and, you're pretty as fuck."
You couldn't help but smile at her compliment, "Even if that's true, I'm completely inexperienced."
"It's not that hard."
"Yeah, says the girl who had both Hogwarts champions drooling over her. No offence, babe, but you're biased."
"That could just have easily been you if you'd ever spoken to either of them."
"Whatever you say."
Cho sighed, deciding to not argue any further with you on the matter - for now.
***
It was amazing how potions went from your least favourite subject to your favourite after Slughorn took over from Snape. The lessons were no longer a fear-inducing chore, but instead a time of laughter and enjoyable learning: the way it should be.
Harry Potter especially seemed to be flourishing in the subject, much to the dismay of Hermione Granger, who usually took the spot at the top of the class. You were glad to not be a part of their constantly hectic lifestyles, although you had almost been when Cho had a thing with Harry the year prior.
Regardless, your main focus during potions was the gorgeous Slytherin boy who sat across the classroom from you - another of the best students in the class. Your seat was stationed at the perfect angle to sneak glances at him without raising too much suspicion: you definitely hadn't ensured that a few weeks ago during the first lesson or anything.
"Shit, I forgot the anjelica," you muttered to yourself, gazing at the list of ingredients in front of you as you had been wondering why your potion was a navy blue when it was meant to be a royal blue.
You left your station to head over to the ingredients cupboard, where you gazed at the arrangement before you. It was organised alphabetically, so your eyes shifted to the top left hand corner where you spotted the jar that you were after.
You stood on your tiptoes in attempt to reach it, but after failing, you huffed, going to pull out your wand instead. That was when a hard chest pressed against your back and a large pale hand grasped the very jar that you were in dire need of. You turned around quickly only to spot the guy you had fancied for an unhealthy amount of time - and his face was shockingly close to yours. His scent swarmed your nostrils, making your knees weak.
He raised an eyebrow at you.
Coming to your senses, you cleared your throat, "Uh, I need some of that anjelica- please."
His eyes shifted down to the jar in his hand as he stepped back slightly. The added distance meant that you could finally breathe.
Nott presented the jar to you, and you gratefully took it, thanking him in the process. As you went to open it and take what you needed, he left the cupboard and went back to his station, which was in view of where you were. You remained shocked for a few moments: did he not need some of the herb? His eyes locked on to yours from where he now was, making you panic and quickly depart the cupboard with the jar still in your hand.
Rowena, how did Cho expect you to ask him out when you couldn't even make eye contact with him?
***
The following morning, you were sat at breakfast with Cho and your other fellow Ravenclaws, busy discussing the latest ancient runes essay that you had to complete. Just as you began to discuss the difficulties you had with writing the conclusion, you were interrupted by the sound of owls from above. The morning post had arrived.
Typically, you didn't get anything. Maybe the occasional letter from your mother, but that was about it. So, you were mildly surprised to see an envelope drop in front of you.
It was a very small envelope: that was the most confusing part. You couldn't think as to why your mother wouldn't send a normal-sized letter, but you opened it nonetheless. Only, the contents of the envelope made your stomach drop as dread filled your bones and veins.
A tiny note was enclosed, that wasn't addressed or signed, and it simply read "I see you staring at me". Instinctively, your eyes looked up and over to the Slytherin table, where Theodore Nott sat, evidently having been watching you this entire time. His face was completely blank, until he arched an eyebrow at you - clearly a favoured expression of his - which made you begin panicking.
"Oh, fuck," you mumbled, "Fuck, fuck, fuck."
Only Cho, who was sat next to you, heard your profanities, and turned to you with confusion adorning her face. "What is it?"
You passed the note over to her, still gazing at Nott who now had the slightest of amused smirks tugging on his lips.
"Oh, fuck," Cho mimicked you, finally making you prize your eyes away from the boy, "Yeah, I see why you're panicking."
"This is going to socially ruin me," you sighed, "He'll probably tell the other Slytherins and then they'll bully me until the end of my school career."
"Okay, catastrophising much?" she said, gently slapping you, "Nott like never talks, I highly doubt he divulges his friends with personal information."
"Yeah, his personal information!" you whisper-yelled.
"I mean, maybe he likes you back."
"What?"
"He doesn't indicate at all in that note that he's mad at you for staring at him."
"Yeah, but, don't you think he'd go about it in a different way if he returned the feelings?"
Cho paused to think for a moment, "No, actually. Maybe he was pretty sure that you were staring at him, but needed to confirm it. So, he wrote that note to you, intentionally not signing it, to see if you would immediately look to him after reading it."
Your eyes widened with realisation, "Wait, are you saying I could have still saved myself, but instead instantly looked in his direction like a fucking idiot?"
"Y/N," she hit your arm, "I think this is a good thing. Try and be more optimistic."
"Easy for you to say."
***
You felt sick to your stomach as you arrived at your potions lesson that day, keeping your head down as you took your usual seat. Normally, this would be when you'd steal your first glance at Theodore Nott, but the thought of seeing his face again paralysed you with fear.
"Y/N, relax," Cho whispered to you, but her words were futile. Relaxation seemed impossible in times like this.
"Today, class, I want you to pair up with someone you don't usually work with," Professor Slughorn announced, "By that I mean, someone who isn't from your house and doesn't sit on your table."
You mumbled a curse under your breath as people began to move around, looking up to try and locate the nice Hufflepuff girl you sat next to in history of magic. Only, Cho had already disappeared to her side, and they were chatting happily with each other. Rowena, this was bad. You didn't have the biggest social circle.
"Excellent, everyone seems to be in pairs," Slughorn spoke, making you furrow your eyebrows.
Looking to your side, you were shocked to see that Nott had silently sat next you, and was gazing at you intently.
"Hi," you squeaked, flashbacks of breakfast flooding back to you.
He gave you a curt nod, and turned back to face the front.
You didn't listen to a single instruction that Slughorn gave after that, as your brain was much too pre-occupied with concepts of social suicide and humiliation. Was Nott just trying to torture you?
"L/N," a deep voice snapped you out of your thoughts. That was it. The first time you had ever heard Theodore Nott speak.
You turned to him, only to realise that everyone was standing up and getting ingredients - had you really been that spaced out?
It must have been evident in your facial expression that you had no idea what was going on, because Nott opened his potions book and pointed at the potion that you were making. You looked at the ingredient list, but you couldn't say that you were actually taking any of it in.
Clearly, Nott was aware of this fact, and let out a small sigh that made you feel exceptionally guilty. Regardless, he walked over to the ingredients cupboard himself without another word and soon returned with everything you needed. In the meantime, you had snapped out of your stupor and set up the cauldron and cutting board. You didn't want him to completely regret pairing up with you.
What potion were you even making? You finally processed the words on the page: amortentia. Your eyes widened.
This might not end well.
***
You had never thought being a remarkable potion maker - who was collaborating with a fellow remarkable potion maker - would be a bad thing. It turned out that it very much could be when the steam from your concoction wafted up your nose, overwhelming your senses with the smell of intertwined chestnut and paper money. As if the faint scent of Nott that you picked up on whenever he walked past didn't make you nervous enough, now it filled the entire room, since you certainly weren't the only capable potion makers in the class.
"Alright, class, it seems that we have all about finished," Slughorn clapped his hands together, "And, now, for my favourite part."
You had a feeling you knew what was coming.
"Miss Parkinson, what does the potion smell like to you?"
"Uh," the girl flushed a bit, her eyes flicking towards Draco Malfoy, "I don't know how to describe it - clean, expensive. Like a really fancy fragrance."
"Fascinating, most fascinating," Slughorn replied, his eyes gleaming, "Mr Nott, what about you?"
Were you already about to hear him speak for the second time? He hadn't spoke throughout the entire potion making process, which, to be honest, you were kind of glad for.
"Coconut," he said simply, "And vanilla."
Your breath hitched.
You used coconut shampoo.
Your favourite perfume was a vanilla scent.
"That is most interesting!" Slughorn grinned, "It is fascinating to hear what enraptures you all the most!"
You didn't realise that your eyes had glued on to Nott as Slughorn proceeded to ask other students what amortentia smelled of to them until the Slytherin boy turned to face you and raised a singular eyebrow.
You felt warm underneath his gaze.
He smirked.
***
You packed up at the end of the lesson, preparing to return to the Ravenclaw tower until dinner time along with Cho who was still across the room. Just as you were about to walk over to her, Nott grabbed your arm and jerked his head in the direction of the door. It was a silent invitation to walk with him somewhere, from what you could gather. You turned around to tell Cho where you were going, but she had already disappeared, much to your confusion.
The first few minutes of the walk were in silence, and the awkwardness was killing you. It was only once you had emerged from the dungeons that Nott finally said something.
"You aren't subtle."
A lightning bolt of shock and nerves shot up your spine and made you stiffen up as you walked. You managed to force out a mumble of, "I know."
He shrugged, "It's cute."
Had you heard him right? No, you couldn't have. You just weren't used to hearing his voice.
"I thought you were shy," you muttered, but he heard and chuckled a bit.
"No. Just quiet."
You clutched your books close to your chest.
"You're shy," he added.
You nodded.
He chuckled again, and silence ensued for another couple minutes.
"Hogsmeade," he said.
You hummed in surprise.
"This weekend. Me, you."
Your jaw dropped - did he mean a date? A Hogsmeade invitation had certain implications among Hogwarts students.
But he didn't clarify, not once on the way to the Ravenclaw tower.
***
"Relax, Y/N, you'll be great," Cho assured you, wrapping your scarf around your neck since the autumn breeze was nippy in Scotland.
"I don't even know if it's a date."
"Of course it's a date," she shook her head, "Everyone knows what inviting someone to Hogsmeade means."
You grimaced, "I don't know if Nott is the most up to date with social norms."
"Regardless, he's not a fucking idiot."
You gave your best friend a small smile.
"Now, he'll be waiting for you in the courtyard, so hurry!"
***
You had only ever seen Theodore Nott in casual clothing from afar before, catching a glimpse of him before he disappeared amongst the other Slytherins. But, Rowena, you had been missing out on quite an indulgent sight.
How could a man make such a simple outfit of a knitted jumper and baggy jeans look so good? You didn't understand it, unable to feel anything but self-conscious in your own ensemble.
He didn't smile at you as you approached, but instead gave you a curt nod. And, as you both began walking towards the carriage, the silence was truly beginning to suffocate you. So, you reached inside the crevices of your brain to talk about something - anything - and finally landed on informing him of every little thing that had happened to you that week. It wasn't particularly interesting, mainly because you were omitting the details about him, but it meant that the quietness was filled with your babbling.
Which was how it went the entire journey to Hogsmeade.
At first you weren't sure he was listening, but when you paused mid sentence for a moment, he raised his eyebrow at you and gestured for you to go on. So you did.
"...and honestly, I don't know why Cho thought that was a good idea," you sighed as you both stepped out of the carriage, "She nearly set her hair on fire!"
You heard a small chuckle erupt from the boy next to you, making you look over to him in surprise.
"What about you? How's your week been?" you asked cautiously, nervous to see his reaction to a question that required a wordy response.
He shrugged.
It was frustrating.
You chewed your lip for a few seconds, "Look- I get you find communication difficult. But, please, I need more to work with here."
He gave you a surprised expression, and stopped walking, making you halt too. Nott looked around pensively, completely unreadable.
"Nott?"
He looked at you and scowled, "Theo," he corrected.
"Theo- what are you doing?"
Letting out a loud exhale, he grabbed your hand and pulled you away from the main street of Hogsmeade and to a more hidden area behind some of the houses. When you turned around, you realised that he was right in front of you - to the point that you could feel the warmth of his breath on your face.
"I'm not good with words," he mumbled.
You hummed in agreement.
"I don't like talking to people," he continued, "But I want to talk to you."
Your breath hitched, "Really?"
"I'm not an idiot- I've known that you've fancied me for years."
You felt your ears heat up.
"But this year, when we started back, I-" he paused, trying to piece together the words in his mind, "I saw you, and it was different than before. I wanted your attention."
A smile crept on to your face as you gazed up at him.
"So, I know I need to work on being open - but I want to try. For you."
You don't know where the wave of confidence came from, but you found yourself pressing your lips against his and combing your fingers through his hair. He gasped at the sudden contact, but quickly reciprocated the affection until you pulled apart.
"Rowena... I always thought you knew. I can't believe I was right."
"Horrifying?"
"A little," you nodded, "But it's obviously worked out."
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masterlist
written; 03/06/2023 —> 15/08/2023 published;17/08/2023 edited; —/—/——
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woso-dreamzzz · 1 month ago
Text
Princesse's Halloween
Hardersson x Daughter!Reader
Natalia Guijarro (OC) x Hardersson!Reader
Part of The Big Adventures Universe
Summary: The sixth of my Halloween-centric fics
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"You're saying this is a family tradition?" Talia asks, one brow raised in confusion as you gather Kung up in your lap to feed him treats.
"Yes."
"And your mums did this all the time?"
"Yes," You laugh," Right up until I was born. Then they had to include me in it."
"And they just choose each other's costumes? Nothing fancy? And the other person has to wear it?"
"Yes."
Talia grins, looking you up and down and you get the funny feeling that you're missing something.
"Do you want to do?"
"I would love to do it." You girlfriend practically purrs out the words and now you definitely know you're missing something.
But Kung thumps his foot and Reina hisses on the balcony at the neighbours and Prins whines to go on his walk and you forget all about the look Talia had on her face when you told her about your family tradition.
It doesn't even come to mind again until you're welcoming your mothers in the day before Halloween.
"Oh," Talia says, throwing her bag down onto a spare chair as she comes in from her media commitments.
She's had a lot of those now that she's the Barcelona captain and you're secretly very thankful you don't have a captaincy. You don't know if you'd make a very good captain.
It's a dream, of course. Every wannabe footballer, pictures captaining their club and their country but you don't know if anyone would ever see you as a leader like that.
It's one thing to captain a youth team. It's something completely different to captain a senior team.
"I didn't realise you guys were coming today," Talia continues," I thought you were coming in a few days?"
"You'd be surprised by how many flights are packed after Halloween," Pernille throws over her shoulder, having completely taken over the stove in the short time she's been in your apartment.
Magda's over by one of the shelves, staring intently at Rocky like she's willing him to blow up with her eyes. "It's awful. There was a baby on our flight. It wouldn't stop crying. Who brings a baby into business class?"
You laugh. "You've gotten grumpy in your old age, Morsa," You say fondly.
"We didn't travel with you at all!"
"You did," You say," I used to go to camp with Momma."
Magda flicks her hand dismissively. "Yeah but you were a well behaved baby. You barely cried." She looks over at Talia, nose wrinkled. "I bet you cried a lot."
Talia grins, more of a smirk really as Reina clambers all over her. "And tantrums. They're the stuff of legend in my family. Completely blew Patri's tantrums out of the water."
"Yeah, well-"
"Must you two do this every time?" Pernille asks, plating up food and opening some drinks. "We get it. You're 'enemies'. Can we just skip this bit and get to the point where you're bonding over being remarkably similar?"
Talia and Magda exchange a look.
"You always ruin my fun," Magda complains good-naturedly, sitting down at the table," But fine. Only because I love you." She leans over to kiss Pernille square on the lips.
"Hey!" You say," If you banned PDA for us, no PDA for you! No kissing at my table!"
The meal is delicious as always.
Talia doesn't think for a moment that Magda was the better cook from your childhood no matter how many times you insist she was.
After cleaning up and a few movies, you finally remember that look a few weeks ago. The look that Talia gave you when she agreed to pick out your costume this year.
Magda and Pernille had gone first with Pernille choosing a cute tiger onesie for Magda and Magda choosing a massive, inflatable chicken costume for Pernille that nearly didn't fit through the doorway when she came in wearing it.
You'd chosen a fairly goofy looking vampire costume for your own girlfriend, complete with a set of fangs that glow in the dark.
It's only when you get changed into the costume that Talia chose for you, that you remember that god awful smirk she wore when you explained to her your family tradition.
"Er..." You look at yourself in the mirror, trying to pull down the skirt of your nurse's outfit. "Talia, are you sure this is everything? It's...Kind of short..."
You can hear Talia cough, movement outside the door and then her head is popping in.
"I...er...bought this before I found out your parents were coming. You look good though."
"So I take it this is the full costume."
"You look very good as a sexy nurse," Talia says, grinning back at you in the mirror.
You purse your lips in thought. "Yes, I do." You turn, passing her in the doorway. "I'm looking forward to hearing how you're going to explain this one to my mothers."
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a-hazbin-reader · 10 months ago
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Eeek I love your writing it makes me so 🫶🫶🫶 Can I make a request?
If you do angst to comfort, can you make reader waiting for Alastor to come back (they're married) for seven years? Reader's friends has been pushing them to have a new lover—introducing them to new demons or overlords that the reader might like, but the reader only loves one; which is Alastor. Until Vox made the news that he was back, for months, without looking for the reader. Which makes the reader think Alastor doesn't love them anymore and tries to not be in his attention whenever they meet and pretends to not know him. What will Alastor do? :3 Thank yous!!!
Oh man...that ANGST!!!
Alastor X Reader Headcanons
✅️Romantic
❌️Platonic
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TW: Reader is sad, Suggestive
Description: ☝️⬆️
When Alastor first dissappears, you assume he's just busy and will be back by the end of the day
And then you wake up alone...so maybe he'll be back tomorrow. Tomorrow turns into a week, a week turns into a month...
He's just gone, suddenly ripped away from you without warning and you didn't even get a proper goodbye
So you search for him, you ask everyone if they've seen him or heard about his whereabouts
You even ask Vox if he managed to kill your husband, knowing the TV head wouldn't be able to resist bragging about it
Instead, he looks surprised and uncomfortable with your obvious distress, muttering something about keeping an eye out for you
Rosie is worried too and offers her help but turns up nothing, she does her best to keep an eye on you
You never give up on finding him, knowing that he's alive out there
After the first three years your friends start trying to get you to move on, setting you up with available bachelors
Valentino has offered to help you get over your husband multiple times because he's just such a good guy
You don't give any of them a chance, you had already found the one man you wanted to be with for eternity and married him
He's just not here at the moment
The pain in your heart is just as strong as when you first realized Alastor was missing, crying yourself to sleep nearly every night
The only time you get to see him now is in your dreams, clutching one of his jackets with his scent still on it
You just feel so abandoned...
After the sixth year, your friends try to get you to move or throw out some of Alastor's things but you can't bring yourself to do it
He's going to come back to you, you know it, so you keep your wedding ring on and still present yourself as a married woman
Rosie makes sure you take care of yourself on the days when your sadness swallows you whole
"Wipe away those tears now, have you eaten today? No? I have just the thing for you.."
Seven years go by and nothing has changed for you
You're sad and miserable, running errands when you suddenly pass by an electronics store, seeing Vox on the TV
That's nothing new to you, you almost turn away and keep walking until you hear Vox say something about Alastor
You're suddenly frozen, listening to Vox bitch about Alastor's multiple offenses during these last few months
He's been back...for months..? And hasn't come to see his wife?
You're blinking away hot tears, the air in your lungs going sour and your stomach doing flips
Did Alastor really abandon you like that? You need to go see the one person who you know has been digging into Alastor for as long as you have
Vox literally screams like a child when you're suddenly bursting into his office and grabbing him by his suit
"How long has my FUCKING HUSBAND BEEN BACK!? And why didn't you tell me, Vox!? WHY!?"
"FUCK! Who let you in here!?"
"VOX!" You're shaking him now, making his screen glitch out
"A-at least a couple of months for sure! He's doing something with Lucifer's daughter and a hotel or some shit! I thought you would've been the first to know he was back!"
Vox is relieved when you finally let go of him, fixing his suit before suddenly giving you a cruel grin
"Wait wait wait-don't tell me-he hasn't come to see you this whole time!? You wait all these years for him and he's shacking up with Lucifer's daughter, a porn star and who knows who else!?"
He suddenly stops laughing when you slam his screen into his desk, storming out afterward so he doesn't see the angry tears in your eyes
"Don't get mad at me because he started a new life without you!"
Vox knew exactly which ugly worries to pull out of your head and you let him get to you
But you knew he was right, looking at all the evidence presented to you...it does look like Alastor is starting over
A small part of you is telling you that he's replaced you somehow but you have enough pride to doubt it
But that self pity comes back to bite you that same night, crying harder than you ever have before
By the end of the week, you've convinced yourself that he doesn't love you anymore, that he got bored of you
You still haven't taken off your wedding ring yet
Imagine your surprise when on your way home you bump into Charlie Morningstar, the princess of hell herself
She somehow managed to crash into you and knock down everything you were carrying, making you sigh and bend down to pick it up
"Oh my gosh, I'M SO SORRY!!" 🥺
You mumble something forgiving back to her, still picking up your things when you hear a familiar voice that makes your heart ache
"Charlie, my dear! What sort of mischief have you gotten int-Y/N?"
You're still as beautiful as Alastor remembers, if not even more so
You can hear the surprise in his voice, along with notes of panic and guilt
You just ignore him, gathering the rest of your things before walking in the opposite direction of them, you don't dare look at Alastor
You know you would break down if you did
He doesn't follow you, nor does he follow you the next time you run into him, or the time after that
It hurts you a little more each time, wanting to know if your husband ever loved you at this point
He doesn't know what boundaries to push with you anymore, he just misses you like crazy
Alastor knows he has to do something-
He tries cornering you the next time he sees you, standing in your way
"Y/N, please just let me explain-"
"I don't know who you're talking about, I'm not who you think I am."
He grabs your wrist, eyeing your wedding band with a frustrated expression
"You're wearing our wedding ring..."
"This is the ring my husband gave to me, and I haven't seen him in years."
You rip away your arm and walk away from him, crying to yourself over how much it hurts
You don't see how his ears lay low, and how he watches you with a regretful expression
He wishes he could just tell you everything, wants to run after you and hold you
But his deal doesn't allow it, he wanted to go straight to you when he got back-never wanted to leave you in the first place
But he was also too ashamed to face you, scared to find that you moved on or that you no longer loved him
He hates that he's hurting his wife like this and it sours his mood for weeks afterwards
Charlie and Vaggie start to understand that Alastor's sudden angry attitude always happens whenever he sees you
But they don't know who you are and they're way too afraid to ask Alastor because he's still digging his claws into everything out of anger
Niffty is actually the one who tells them that you're his wife but Husk explains to them that you're probably pissed at him for disappearing
Charlie is crying at the thought of Alastor and his wife being separated, Vaggie having to comfort her
So the two women get to work on finding you themselves, showing up on your doorstep one day and inviting you to the hotel
It takes a lot of coaxing and convincing from them to finally get you to go with them
You're a bit surprised to hear that Alastor is helping with a hotel centered around the idea of redemption
But you figure he's got some sort of angle, he always does
Alastor isn't there when you three arrive, Charlie having talked your ear off about everything Alastor has been doing to help
Which is unlike him, you're immediately suspicious
But you recognize Husk and Niffty, the little woman running to you and crawling all over you in excitement
"Y/N! Y/N! You're here! Are you gonna stay? Is your house messy? Do you have roaches for me to kill~?"
"Hey Y/N, you look like you need a drink.."
You almost start crying then and there, not having realized how much you missed them too, hugging Niffty tight as you take a seat at the bar
It almost feels like old times, the three of you talking late into the night until it's just you and Husker...
He takes a shot and seems to be preparing himself for something, uncomfortable suddenly
"Y/N...there's something I gotta tell you...about your husband..."
You're expecting to hear the worst, to hear that Alastor cheated, to hear that he's seeing someone new
But what Husk tells you is far FAR from that...you don't know whether to be thankful or horrified
Your husband's soul...owned by someone else? Just what did that man get himself into?
You don't even realize you're crying until Husk is awkwardly hugging you, patting your back gently as you cling to him
At some point, you must've fallen asleep because you wake up in an unfamiliar bed, your face buried in Alastor's neck
You almost relax and fall back asleep before your eyes suddenly pop open, jolting up and shoving him away
Even with what Husk told you, you're still mad at him, he never came back to see you
Alastor wakes up fast enough to realize he's falling off the bed, climbing back up with downward facing ears
"We need to talk, darling.."
"What is there to talk about? You don't want a wife anymore, is that it? Is that why you never came to see me?"
He looks so guilty and upset, his smile tense as he looks away, you have to resist the urge to rub his ears
You flinch away at first when he takes your hands before reluctantly letting him hold them, missing him too much to fight it
"I was too ashamed to face you...there's so much I can't tell you and I was...scared that you would be with someone new."
"Do you have any idea how much pain I was in? Alastor, it nearly broke me.."
He has tears pricking in the corners of his eyes, looking away to try and save face as he pulls you in for a tight hug
"Just please...forgive me and let me be your husband again. I'll do everything I can to fix this..."
It doesn't make up for all the pain you felt for seven years but it's definitely a start
You've missed him too much to continue being angry with him, so you just cling to him and cry
You cry until you both fall asleep again, eventually waking up tangled in each other's arms
He's kissing all over your face, ghosting his lips over your eyes, your nose, your forehead, eventually getting to your lips
You suddenly feel so full of emotion, like you could burst with happiness at finally having Alastor again
You had nearly given up hope that you would feel him, taste his lips, or smell his raw scent ever again
You dig your nails into him when he tries to pull away, forcing him to kiss you longer as his hands bruise your hips
You both are panting by the time you pull away, bodies pressed as close as possible out of a need for contact
His voice comes out like static, leaning in for another kiss as gazes at you with loving eyes
"I have missed you...so much..."
You could cry if it weren't for the fact that you were sick of crying, instead rolling yourself on top of him and kissing along his jaw
"You better prove it to me."
His pleased growl followed by claws digging into your clothes answered you well enough
You know he still has a lot to make up for but this is a good start
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Sorry this one came out so long!! I hope you like it!!
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eddiesxangel · 11 months ago
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Could you do a smutty Eddie Munson fic where he’s your older brother’s bsf?
maybe reader has had a crush on Eddie for a while and when she finally decides to move on and date someone Eddie gets jealous?
What Eddie Doesn’t Know | Eddie x f!reader
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AN: I hope you enjoy it! Sorry it took a while to complete. Thank you for the request; I haven’t been inspired by anything non-Christmas-themed in a while. I was literally barking at the trope.
wc: 7.1k oops
Cw: f!reader, reader is 19 and in collage and Eddie is 22 and a full time mechanic, reader goes by a nickname, jealous Eddie, jealous reader, angst, cheating (on the reader but not by Eddie), smut (pet names, oral, dirty talk, p in v), the fluffy ending!
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Pathetic. That was how you felt at this moment in time. Here you were at your college homecoming party, and all you could do was be a wallflower, watching in self-pity as the love of your life. ( who doesn’t know is the love of your life) is pressed up on some girl in the back of the room.
"What are you doin' here, Tink?" you pop out of your daze to see your older brother, Adam, addressing you.
Did your parents name you Tink? No. Were you so obsessed with Peter Pan as a child you demanded to go by Tinkerbell? Yes. The nickname kinds just stuck.
"I go here?" You sass him back.
"This party is for upperclassmen only. How did you get in?" Adam was only three years older.
"Eddie's here, and he doesn't even attend school..." You gave him a pointed look.
"Yeah, cuz he is my best friend... like I said, how did you get in?"
"It's a house party, not Studio 54... I walked in."
"I'm going to kill Cory," He mumbled under his breath. Cory was supposed to be manning the door.
"Yeah, you should definitely get better security, all I had to do was let him feel up my tits, and we walked right on in..."
The Neanderthal didn't actually touch you, but the look on Adam's face when you let Adam believe he did? Priceless. You only lied so Adam would leave you alone.
What actually happened was you, Nancy, and Robin scaled the fence and got in through the back door.
"Cory!" Before you knew it, Adam was out of your hair, and you were back to being a wallflower….
"Tink there you are! You wanna continue to mope in the corner, or do you wanna get out of here?" your two best friends/roomies, Robin and her girlfriend Nancy, approach you.
"I guess let's just go." you sigh.
You can no longer bear the sight of Eddie, the boy you've been crushing on since the sixth grade, and your older brother’s best friend, leading the random girl up the stairs hand in hand.
Your stomach lurched at the thought of her hands running all over his body, how he would be on her, kissing her... inside of her. He didn't even know you were here... You should have gone up to him, maybe said hello. Perhaps he would have seen the ridiculous amount of effort you put into your ensemble just to catch his eye. But your efforts were lacking because, to him, you're always going to be Adam's annoying little sister.
You knew you had to get over this, but how could you? He has been in your life for fifteen years and always will be. Adam and Eddie have been friends for as long as you can remember. Your brother stuck by him throughout Eddie's family struggles. Your parents even took him in for a few weeks before CPS found his uncle took over full custody. He was basically your big brother, too, until your pesky teenage hormones started to kick in, and boom! You've been head over heels ever since.
''Good, let's get some greasy burgers and fries to end the night, ok?" Robin smiled.
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In the 24-hour diner on campus, you were sitting at your regular booth with the girls across from you, eating your feelings, trying not to think about what Eddie was doing with that girl.
"So that party was a bust, huh?" Nancy spoke first.
"Yeah, totally... probably because Adam's house hosted." You giggled.
"Not to mention Eddie still didn't see you -OUCH." Robin looked over at Nancy, who was giving her a look of distaste. "Sorry, I meant he is an idiot, and you need to get over him! There are plenty of eligible guys on campus who you could date!"
"Even though my girlfriend is being is harsh, she is right, Tink. It's been so long, and you'll kill yourself over this if you keep this up."
"Ugh, I know! Do you think I'm a masochist or something? I hate to break it to you, but I do not enjoy this. I hate it. I hate that he is the one I think about every day when I wake up. I hate it when I go to sleep; he is the last person on my mind. He takes over my thoughts, and I don't know how to stop it!" You shove a fry into your mouth so you can take a breather.
"What if we found you a new guy? Someone to take your mind off Eddie?" Nancy perked up at her idea.
You heard the diner doorbells chime from behind you.
"I don't know..." Putting all your time and energy into someone new seemed like a lot of emotional work you wanted to avoid going through.
"Yes! Oh my god, Tink, you have to. It's the only way you'll get over him!"
"Get over who?" The silky, sweet voice of a male came from behind you.
You and the girls froze as Eddie, your brother, and a few other guys approached the table.
"No one." You mumbled, trying to fight off the blood rushing across your chest and cheeks.
"You can tell us, Tink! Who are we fighting?" Eddie laughed.
"Tink? What kind of stupid name is that?" one of Adam's jerk friends spoke.
"Excuse me?" you turn to see the guy you've never met.
You heard Adam burst out laughing with the rest of them, but not Eddie.
"Hey man, not cool!" Eddie stood up for you.
And there went the butterflies in your stomach. Eddie was always your protector. Even as kids, when Adam picked on you, he always stood up for you. Even if you weren't around, Eddie always put Adam in his place when it came to you.
You saw, out of the corner of your eye, Eddie shifted his weight down so he could sit beside you. Then, you felt a protective arm wrap around your shoulder.
Fuck. This shit right here is why you can never get over Eddie Munson.
You dared to look up; there he was in all his glory. The way the fluorescent light from above had cast down on him made him look like an angel. He smiled at you, but not before you noticed the dishevelled sex hair he tried to fix and the small amount of pink lipstick that stained the skin on his neck that he didn't quite get off. And the smell… sickly sweet perfume that was definitely not his signature musk.
You quickly turn your head back to your plate because you think you're about to puke up everything you just ingested…
"You, if you don't leave us alone." Robin piped up. She saw the look of pure disappointment in your eyes. You didn't need Eddie to rub in the fact that he hooked up with someone, especially since now he is smelling like a cheap hooker.
Robin and Nancy thought it was incredibly rude of your brother to flaunt Eddie in front of you like this. Of course, he knew your mega super infinity crush on his best friend. Yet here he is with his drunk-ass buddies, antagonizing you about the guy you needed to get over.
"Woah, Birdie, take it easy; we are just saying hello," Adam chimed in.
“You said hello at the party. Now leave!” You gritted through your teeth.
“You were at the party?” Eddie asked. His voice hitched high. High enough, it was embarrassingly so. Thankfully, his friends were too drunk and hungry to realize. A deep blush crossed his face when he saw you noticed the tone in his voice change. You just have a slight nod and continue to play with the food on your plate.
That’s why you were so dressed up. Eddie thought you looked so pretty, too pretty to be sad about some looser in a diner at one in the morning.
"Do we have a problem here?" A voice none of you recognized came from the booth beside you.
You all look over and see a cute guy with blonde hair and blue eyes wearing your school's rugby jersey. He was so not your type, but you can still admire beauty for what it is. He was a jock; that was clear as he stood up. He was big, more significant than your brother and Eddie, that's for sure.
"Nah, man, it's cool. This is my little sister and her friends." Adam slurs. Clearly, he had more shots since he left you to find Cory.
"I don't care who you are. You're clearly bothering them."
"It's okay, they were just leaving," Nancy said confidently.
"Whatever, let's go, guys," Adam commanded the pac, but Eddie lingered. He didn't like this blondie guy. He didn't like the way he was looking at you.
"Ed, come on!'
Eddie got up and slowly made his way to his friends.
"I'm Jesse," Eddie heard the musclehead speak, and he cringed internally. Something wasn't right. The feelings of anger and protectiveness were filling his mind.
Eddie looked back again and saw you smelling at the stranger as he reached out to shake your hand before sitting beside you.
What kind of freak is alone in a diner at 1:15 am? Eddie thought.
But it didn't seem to phase you or the girls; you were all blinded by his shiny hair and pearly white smile.
Eddie walked out and felt like he wanted to punch something. He needed to get away. He needed to know what the fuck was wrong with him? Why was he feeling this way? Why were you the one causing him distress? You were just Tink? Or so Eddie thought.
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Jesse turned out to be really cool. You exchanged numbers, and he asked you to go to the movies next Friday. You hadn’t been on a date in forever; you had been so hung up on Eddie that any other guy seemed uninteresting. But this time, you were determined that Jesse would be the one to break the cycle. He was much different than you’re generally into, but you have some of the same interests, like movies and music, so you thought you’d go for it.
Jesse picked you up, bought the tickets, and insisted on buying the snacks and drinks. He held your hand and then slowly made his way to wrap his arm around your shoulder. It gave you butterflies you hadn’t felt from anyone else. Before you knew it, you willingly leaned in to make out with him in the back of the theatre.
You were so focused on Jesse that you didn’t notice Eddie was also on a date in the same theatre. But Eddie noticed you. He was seething the whole time. He didn’t pay any attention to his date or the movie. He hogged the popcorn and munched away as he watched you giggle and flirt with the blockhead jock. Eddie didn’t care that he had pissed off his date. He hardly said two words to her when they parted ways, not even offering to drive her home.
He didn’t want to go out with her but had hooked up with her at the party and felt terrible about it then. Now, he can’t even remember her name or why he went upstairs with her in the first place.
You were there, at the party, but he didn’t see you. Now he sees you everywhere, and it’s pissing him off. Why were you on his mind all of the time? For the past week, why have his dreams been consumed by you and you alone? Why did he want to hold you, be with you, talk to you, dare he say… kiss you? You were Adam’s little sister. Well, not so little anymore. You were a late bloomer, but boy, did you bloom.
Eddie hated how the blonde meathead’s hand rested too low on your back. His hands grazed your skirt a little too closely. Eddie wanted to jump the guy, but he couldn’t. He was twice his size. He would be pulverized, and that would be mortifying in front of you. You wouldn’t want him like that anyway, even if he did win in a fight over you!
What the fuck was Eddie thinking? He wasn't… that's the problem. He's now thinking about getting into a physical altercation over you. He isn't able to sleep now without thinking about you. He needed to get his head on straight and quit fucking around. He hoped that if he just focused on the cars at work, this little thing would go away on its own. Maybe he can't remember that he had slipped and hit his head? Yeah, that's it. He hit his head, and now his brain is just confused. He didn't like you like that! This will all go away by tomorrow.
Wrong.
Eddie was plagued with thoughts of you. He caught himself in numerous daydreams about you while doing mindless tuneups and tire changes at the shop. It was getting out of hand; it’s been another week, and he still can’t get you off his mind… Eddie needed to be proactive. The guys were starting to give him shit about it too. They knew he was focused on a girl. They could sense it.
There was another party tonight that Adam mentioned. He will go home and get cleaned up. Then he will go to the party, he will find a nice pretty girl who will let him bury himself inside her, to forget about his thoughts of splitting your open with his cock, and this will all be over.
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You walked into the party hand in hand with Jesse. He was starting to make waves in your life, being only two weeks, but still. He would walk you to your classes and help you study in the library. He would walk you home and kiss you goodbye like the perfect gentleman. He hadn't tried making any advances as of yet. The two of you had only made it to first base. Maybe tonight you would get lucky? You felt ready.
“You want something to drink?” Jesse guided you to the kitchen.
The house was hot and sticky; you were worried about your hair getting frizzy. You worked so hard on it to look good for Jesse. He even complimented it when he picked you up. Forever the gentleman.
“Whatever they have is good.” You smiled up at him.
As the two of you walked into the packed kitchen, you tried to squeeze your way around but got stuck in the crowd. It was much easier for Jesse to get by just with his size alone.
“Excuse me,” you repeated three times, but no one was budging.
“You should be a little bit more assertive,” the voice behind you said. It sent a shiver down your spine.
As you turned, you saw Eddie smirking down at you. He was drunk. You could see that and smell it.
“Hi, Eddie.” You smiled meekly before you felt the weight of Jesse’s arm wrap around you, passing you your drink.
“There you are,” Jesse smiled. "Who's this?"
"That's just Eddie...Eddie, Jesse. Jesse, Eddie." You introduced awkwardly.
Just Eddie. The words stung.
"How do the two of you know each other?" Jesse gestures between the two of you.
"Brothers best friend." You smile.
"That's all I am to you? You wound me, Tink."
The fuck was that supposed to mean?
"Eddie, man! I got us two hotties over by the pool. Let's go!" In comes your obnoxious brother with perfect timing, as always.
"I guess I'll see you around." Eddie sighed.
"Nice meeting you, man." Jesse stuck out his hand.
"Whatever." Eddie brushed him off and left with Adam.
"I'm sorry about him. That was very rude. I don't?- He's usually not like that?"
"It's okay; I can tell a jealous guy when I see one." Jesse shrugged.
You almost spat out your drink. "Jealous?!"
"Oh, it's clear as day, honey."
"No... there is no way. He's never and will never like me... like that." It broke your heart to say that out loud. Your chest felt so heavy as the words came out of your mouth.
As the rest of the night went on, you and Eddie tried avoiding one another like the plague. Those words about him being jealous were swimming around in your head for most of the night, and Eddie was trying to avoid his feelings by being with another girl, but not one stood out to him.
Adam tried getting lucky but struck out when Eddie refused to go with the friend.
"What the fuck is your problem, man? She was like a solid eight out of ten."
"I wasn't into it..." Eddie's eyes found you, and he couldn't break his gaze. You were curled up in the blockhead's lap, sitting by the fire pit, all cozy and giggly. What he would give to have you in his arms like that.
"Oh fuck, not you now." Adam groaned in frustration, seeing where Eddie's googly eyes were directed.
"Huh?" Eddie said absentmindedly, not really paying attention.
"You can't be serious?! That's my little sister, dude; come on!" Adam was always one for the dramatics; that's why he and Edie got on so well.
"Woah, man, I never said anything about your sister."
"Well, it sure is clear by the way you're making heart eyes at her."
"Yeah, right," Eddie scoffed.
"Trust me, dude, it's that same way she looks at you." Adman shook his head. He thought he would be clear of this. That this would never happen, and yet here it is, happening.
"Wait, what? What do you mean?-"
"She's been in love with you since she was twelve... come one like you didn't know?"
"No way, you smoked too much tonight, or something? Maybe my stuff is off?"
"She likes you, dude. Never fucking shuts up about you."
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Didn't think it was relevant... I was never going to allow her to be with you! You serious? It's Tink, she's so...ew. You're so above that."
"She's not ew," Eddie snapped. He hated how hard Adam had always been on you.
"Whatever, man, too late now. About time she has moved on."
Eddie stood up and walked out of the party without a word. He heard Adam call out, but he ignored him completely. He needed to process what Adam told him. He needed to sober up so he could think clearly. He needed to either make you his or find a way to get over you... and fast.
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That night of the party, you didn't end up getting lucky. You tried making advances, but you inevitably were shot down. He said he didn't want your first time to be when you both had been drinking and in some random bathroom. So you accepted it, even though your horny gremlin was starting to come back to life. But what did happen was he asked you to make it official with him, and you said yes!
Tonight, you had to leave the apartment for your roommate's sake. It was their anniversary, and you told them you could have the place to themselves for a romantic evening. When you told Jesse, your new boyfriend, you needed a place to crash, he offered you his bed. You would go to your classes and then return to his for your first sleeepover as a couple. You were so excited!
Jesse ended class at one in the afternoon that day, and you ended at five, so it worked out perfectly. Luckily enough for you, your professor for your last lecture was ill, so they cancelled class that day. You thought it would be fun to surprise him by showing up early.
When you got to his house, his roommate let you in and said he was in his room with his friend Connor. So when you knocked on the door and walked in a few seconds later, you did not expect to see the two men in bed, naked...
You screamed and covered your eyes, absolutely mortified that you had walked in on them. You were so unbelievably hurt that you had been deceived. Why would he ask you to be exclusive if he was sleeping around?! And on the night when you thought you would get to have sex with your new boyfriend.
You did not give Jesse any time to explain himself as he tried to get out of the tangled sheets and arms of the other man. You heard your name being called out, but you ran out of there like a bat out of hell.
Tears stung your cheeks as the cold autumn air began to settle in. The rumble of the dark clouds was also looking quite ominous.
Just your luck. Of course, you would find your boyfriend in the arms of another man, and of course, the universe would make you walk him in the rain. How poetic.
A crack of thunder rumbled in the distance, and that's when the rain came down in buckets. At least it could cover up your tears. You continued walking, but you couldn't think of a place to go? You could not ruin your roommate's night. There is no way Adam would let you stay in his frat house, not that you would want to anyway, and your friends from the class went home for the weekend. Shit... maybe you could spend the majority of the night in the diner and then just walk home really late once they were defiantly sleeping. But your clothes were soaked and---
“Tink, what’s wrong?” you were snapped out of your thoughts by none other than the man who was the cause of this whole mess.
Eddie rolled down the work van window. He was covered in motor oil and dirty from working all day. His muscles ached, and he badly needed a hot shower, but now all he could focus on was you and why you were upset.
“Leave me alone, Eddie.” He hadn’t ever heard you speak to him like this?
“Tink, come on, it’s a literal thunder storm. Let me take you home.”
“Can’t, girls are having date night… told them to have the place to themselves.” You continued to walk as the chill from the rain was beginning to seep through to your bones. Your teeth betray you as the chatter starts.
“Where were you supposed to be right now?”
“None of your business!”
“Tink, don’t make me pull over!”
“Screw you, Eddie!”
“That’s it.” Eddie parked the car and got out. “You’re coming with me.” Eddie picked you up over his shoulder, and you let out a screech.
“Eddie! Put me down, you caveman!” You screamed. If anyone saw you, it looked like you were being kidnapped and taken into a murder van.
“No, can do Tink. I’m taking you home to warm you up. Then you’re going to tell me what the fuck is going on.” He commanded. And if you weren’t so mad, you’d say you were a little turned on by his voice.
You hear the car door open before he plops you into the passenger seat.
“Get in” he points to your legs hanging out of the car.
“Make me.” you shiver.
“You’re being such a child! Let me help you.”
“Fine!” You swing your legs into the van, and Eddie slams the door closed, making you wince.
The car ride was quiet besides the radio and your chattering teeth. You tried to wrap your arms around yourself, but it was of no help. Your t-shirt and jeans clung to you like a second skin, and the car heater was only blowing cool air. You swore you thought your nipples could cut glass.
Eddie said nothing as he tugged you over on the bench seat and wrapped a warm arm around you. You broke out into another chill, but this time, you weren't sure if it was from the rain or from Eddie.
Even though Eddie was self-conscious of smelling like motor oil and body odour, he was more worried about you catching hypothermia.
Once you were inside Eddie's warm apartment, he noticed how your body was on display. You would be the clear winner if you were in a wet t-shirt contest, that's for sure. Eddi's eyes were wide with desire, but he returned to reality when you asked if you could use his shower to warm up.
Eddie nodded absentmindedly as he thought about you being naked in his shower.
"Uh, you mind if I borrow a towel and some dry clothes? I have mine, but they got soaked through my overnight bag..."
"Yeah! Uh- I mean, sure, yeah, whatever..."
You blushed slightly at Eddie, trying to play it cool. He ran to his bedroom and returned with a handful of different fabrics. You took them and then headed into the bathroom.
The hot water defrosted your bones, and when you stepped into Eddie's clothes, his sent hit you like a tidal wave. You brought the old black corroded coffin band tee that he had from high school up to your nose and inhaled deeply. You felt immediate comfort being here, with Eddie, wearing his clothes.
As you stepped out of the bathroom, hair wrapped in the towel, Eddie couldn't help but smile at the sight of you.
"Not a word," you warn.
Eddie mock zipped his lips, then gestured to the couch for you to sit beside him.
"Sorry about being a pain earlier; you caught me at a really, really bad time."
"It's okay, Tink, you're here with me now; that's all that matters." Eddie let the towel around your head fall back so he could see your natural hair. "You wanna tell me what happened? I've never seen you so upset."
"You shook your head no, "It's too embarrassing."
"Come on, it's me we are talking about here."
You paused for a deep breath and decided to just lay it all out on the table... how much worse could it get, right?
“You remember Jesse, right?” Eddie could feel his fist tightening, but he said nothing while nodding his head with a tight lip. What the fuck did he do to you? “Well, he asked me to be his girlfriends no less than a week ago, and I was supposed to spend the night at his place… but I went over early and found him in bed with… someone.” Eddie went to say something but realized you weren’t finished and let you continue.
“Pathetic, isn’t it?! I finally get a boyfriend, and the moment I want to actually sleep with someone who isn’t you, they are in the arms of someone else! Am I really that undesirable?! I was practically throwing myself at him, and it turns out he was fucking his “friend” the whole time.”
You had missed your slip-up, but Eddie hadn't. Eddie didn’t hear anything after “I want to sleep with someone who isn’t you,”
So Adam was right…
“Eddie? Eddddiiieee?” You snapped your fingers in front of his face to try and get back his attention.
Great, so now you’re undesirable AND boring.
“Sorry what?”
“Forget it… you don’t wanna hear about my pitty party. I’ll call a cab and head back to… oh shit, I can’t even go home!”
“Stay here.”
“Eddie, I couldn’t possibly-”
“Yes. Stay. Take my bed; I’ll take the couch.”
“Eddie, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Why not, Tink?” He brushed a fallen piece of hair behind your ear, and those pesky butterflies erupted within your core.
“Because…” because I’m in love with you and don’t know if I can hold back my feelings any longer.
“Exactly, you can’t come up with one. Let me take care of you.” Eddie’s voice dropped an octave.
A chill travelled down your spine. His touch is electric. Any time you’re with Eddie, your body feels like it’s been recharged.
As you gaze into Eddie’s eyes, this undeniable magnetic pull connects you. Was he leaning in? Or were you? Maybe it was the both of you? There was little to no space between you. Never in a million years did you think you would be sitting here, alone with Eddie in his apartment.
“I should get cleaned up,” Eddie whispered. He was so close you could taste the spearmint Nicorette gum he had been chewing. It took everything in his power to pull away. He wanted to kiss you so very badly, but he got a whiff of himself, and he needed to wash up. I would be unfair to you.
“Oh, okay,” you breathed in, and Eddie slid back.
“You can make yourself at home, okay? Help yourself to anything in the kitchen. I’ll be 10 minutes.”
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Eddie was freaking out in the shower, and you were freaking out in the kitchen. While Eddie scrubbed his skin so hard he thought he would scrub it off completely, you went to the fridge to find anything to help calm your nerves.
There wasn’t anything in the fridge, but the freezer, on the other hand... Bingo. You poured yourself a shot of vodka and almost threw up, but you held it together with a chaser of orange juice. You took one more for good measure and then made your way back to the couch. As you waited for your liquid courage to kick in, you flicked around on the TV but didn’t really pay much attention. Your thoughts were swimming with questions and possible scenarios that could play out this evening.
You were taken away from your inner thoughts when Eddie exited the bathroom with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist. You tried not to make it obvious, but the alcohol clouded your awareness of your face.
“Sorry, I left my clothes in the bedroom” he saw you eye fucking him and gave a little smirk.
“It’s okay. Totally okay.” you sighed.
The sight of his wet, bare torso makes your heart race, his flesh covered in goosebumps, his nipples perked, and his hair soaked yet still so sexy. Your stomach simultaneously flip-flopped. And as for your pussy… well, she got a little excited at the heavenly sight in front of you.
“Yeah,” You wanna see more, Tink? Eddie thought to himself.
“Yeah.” You sighed before he disappeared into his bedroom.
Minutes later, Eddie returned, and the two of you acted as if nothing happened. Neither of you willing to break the tension first. So you both sat silently, watching some random TV movie while you prayed to come up with something to discuss. You wanted to talk so badly with him.
“This couch is pretty lumpy; it wouldn’t be fair to make you sleep on it.” You felt terrible that he offered his bed. “I’ll take the couch.”
“Nope. No way.” Eddie shook his head.
“Eddie.” You huffed.
“Tink,” he mocked back.
“You need a good sleep! You work a strenuous job…And my back can take it.”
I bet your back could take it, Eddie thought.
“You calling me old, sweetheart?”
Sweetheart, your stomach did a flip-flop again.
“No.” You snicker at his accusation.
“I don’t think I believe you” Eddie’s tone dropped again.
“Well, I’m not letting up”
“Neither am I; you’re sleeping in my bed whether I’m on it or not.
“Oh...”
“Yeah, oh.” Eddie sat back and the both of you finished the movie in silence.
You didn’t know when you fell asleep, but Eddie shook your shoulder awake.
“Come on Tinkerbell we are going to bed.” You think you hear Eddie whisper.
Were you dreaming? Did Eddie just tell you the two of you were going to bed?
“Mmm?”
“I’m not letting you sleep on the couch, remember? Don’t think you’re getting out of this so easily.”
“Okay, Eddie, “ you agreed in your sleepy haze.
You feel his arm wrap under yours as he helps you off the couch.
“There you go.” Eddie coos as he places you down gently.
The moment your head hits the pillow, you’re suddenly wide awake. You’re in Eddie’s bed. Eddie is getting in next to you.
“Figured we would compromise.” He slid next to you but over the covers with a throw blanket.
“Thanks for letting me stay… and giving me a shoulder to cry on.” You cringed with embarrassment at the last part. “You seem to always be there for me…” you turn to your side to face Eddie.
“I’ll always be there for you, Tink, whether you like it or not…” Eddie also turns so he is facing you.
“Eddie.” Your breath hitched.
“Yes Tink.”
Fuck are you really going to spill your guts to him here and now?
“I… I wanna-need to tell you something.” You close your eyes, not daring to look at him.
“I think I might have an idea.”
“You-what?” Eyes still closed
You feel the bed shift and feel Eddie's warm breath fan your lips.
“Do you trust me?” Eddie whispered.
You aren’t brave enough to speak. So you tentatively nod your head yes.
“Do you trust me, Tink? I need you to say it.” He asked once more.
You slowly opened your eyes and bravely opened your mouth. “Yes, Ed’s, I trust you.”
A slight smile graces Eddie’s before you watch him lean in with a pucker.
Your heart skipped a beat the moment his lips touched yours.
Holy shit.
Eddie Munson was kissing you. Eddie Munson, your older brother's best friend, who you’ve been in love with for seven years, is now kissing you… in his bed… late at night… with no one else around. It was like fireworks were going off. It was everything you ever wanted and more.
It was all you had ever dreamed of, and now he was blowing your expectations out of the water. You had to have more. You needed this to last forever.
Your hands moved up to cup his face. His cheeks were rough with stubble, contrasting his soft plush lips. Eddie shifted closer to you. You could feel his body through the thick blankets that separated the two of you, but you wanted to be closer to him. You threw the blankets and all caution to the wind when you shifted to wrap your legs around him.
Eddie rolled so he was on top of you. To your surprise, you felt his firm cock pressed to your thigh, which made you moan softly.
“Fucking hell, Tink”
“Eddie, please, I need you.”
“Didn’t take you long to beg,” he chuckled darkly.
“Well, it took you long enough to see me.”
Eddie gazed into your eyes like he was looking at you for the first time. Like really seeing you. He muttered your name, your real name, for the first time, and you couldn’t fight the smile that spread across your face before you strained your neck to take his lips once more.
Eddie’s strong hands grazed your waist and settled on your hips, pinning you down to the mattress. His weight is entirely on you now. Your knees hitched up, and you opened your hips more to give him more room.
“Eddie,” you gasped into his mouth. Eddie ground his hips into yours, and you let out another soft moan.
“Tell me what you want.”
“You, it’s always been you.” You confessed.
Eddie didn’t say anything in reply but instead worked his fingers to the waistband of his sweatpants that you dawned.
“This okay?”
“Oh my god, yes,” you rushed. You’ve waited too long for this moment.
“Eager, aren’t we?”
“Don’t be mean,” You shove the pants off your ankles and go for your shirt.
“Wait… let me.” Eddie sat up so you could as well. His hands brushed the hem and slowly pulled the shirt he let you borrow off of you.
He took in your naked frame in front of him.
Shit, you weren’t wearing your panties this whole time? They must have been soaked as well from the rain. Eddie thought.
Eddie saw you shy away as you sat there naked in front of the boy you loved as he took you all in.
It didn’t take long before Eddie’s hands roamed your skin, finding your breasts.
“You’re so soft.” Eddie moaned into your neck as he took in the fact that you now smelled like him. He sent all over you; he was feral. He needed to claim you as his own. How could he be so blind all these years? You were perfect; you were everything he ever wanted.
“Do you like soft?”
“Very much so.”
Eddie melted into you once more as he travelled down your body, kissing and nipping at every inch. You softly moaned when he flicked your nipples with his tongue, and you really moaned when he reached your wet pussy.
How Eddie loved the noises he was pulling from you. He would do anything to make you sing for him.
“You like that baby? You want me to touch you… here?” His index finger grazed your wet slit.
“Yes” you replied quickly, a little too quickly.
“Good, I don’t know what I would have done if you said no.”
You giggled, but it was cut off by the feeling of Eddie’s fingertips grazing your clit.
You’d daydreamed countless times about how his fingers would feel while you watched him while he and your brother jammed in your garage.
He circled your clit before dipping his head down to kiss your lower lips. Reality hit you once again. Eddie was eating you out. Eddie was eating you out like a man starved, in fact. How was he so good at this? Scratch that you didn’t want to know. Your thoughts slowed down as Eddie’s thick fingers entered your wet hole.
“Eddie!” You yelled with pleasure.
“Oh yes, sweetheart, say my name.”
“Eddie, Eddie, Eddie,” you replayed like a mantra.
As his fingers grazed that spot that only you managed to find when you were alone in your bed, exploring your body. You fell apart in his hands.
“Your pussy grips me so good, god I can’t wait to fuck you.”
“Please, Eddie,” you begged in your blissed-out daze.
“Let me hear it again,” he smirked.
“I need you, please. I want your cock so badly."
“Mmmmmm, as you wish.” he pulled back so he could strip. You watched as his tight muscles flexed as he pulled off his shirt, then scrunched as he bent over to take off his bottoms.
His cock sprung out of their confines, and your breath hitched for what you thought was at least the fourth time that night.
You’ve imagined what it would look like, but none of the times ever did you imagine he was this hung. No wonder he was so confident and cocky around women. It was long, thick, and straight. No curvatures, just pure rod.
“I don’t think that’s going to fit,” you blurt out, not thinking.
“Don’t worry, Baby. It’ll fit.” he slunk back down on you, peppering your lips with more sensual kisses. His fingers travelled down to your pussy, stretching you out again, only this time, he used 3 fingers to make sure you were nice and ready.
“Please, I’m ready” You ground your pussy into Eddie’s hand.
Eddie reached over into his drawer, pulled out a condom, and slipped it over his shaft as quickly as possible. Seemed that he was just as eager as you.
Eddie kissed you hard as his cock slipped past your wet folds and inside, splitting you open. The wonderful burn of his cock burying itself inside of you. What could you say? It had been a while, and Eddie was the biggest you’ve ever had.
“Slowly,” you guided Eddie as he rocked his hips, giving you time to adjust.
“God, you’re so tight”
“Mmmphmm”
“Your noises are so pretty.” Eddie tucked a piece of fallen hair behind your ear.
Eddie took your breath away as he looked into your eyes. He was being so soft and gentle with you as if you could break.
“Eddie, please.”
“I got you, Princess”
Eddie rocked his hips with more emphasis; his body was moulding into yours. As his cock grazed your tight walls, you felt your body was brought to life.
“Oh fuck” your words slipped, not even realizing you were speaking.
“Come’on baby, let me hear you”
“You’re making me feel so good, Eddie!”
“More, tell me who you belong to.”
“ You! always been you, Eddie, please, I wanna come. Please make me cum on your cock.”
“Good girl. You’re being so good, f’me” Eddie's hips slapped into the backs of your thighs, and he plummeted into you, making you cry out in pleasure.
Eddie grabbed the backs of your knees and pushed them back to your shoulders, only making the angle more delicious as he fucked you. He watched as his cock disappeared into your wanton pussy. He watched as you clenched down on his cock, and he almost lost it as he tried not to cum right then and there.
“Fuck me, Tink! Your pussy is too good,” he gritted through his teeth, trying to keep the pace without blowing his load.
“Eddie!” Your body was on fire as his cock continuously hit your g spot. Your lower belly tingled as the feeling of your orgasm built up again.
“You close, baby?”
“Yes”
“Cum for me.”
“More, I need more.”
Eddie slipped his hand between you and gently circled your clit once again.
You moan, cockdrunk as your body begins to spasm around Eddie’s cock.
“Yes, that’s it, come on baby. Keep cuming. That’s my girl.”
Your eyes roll back into your head, and you clamp your jaw. Every muscle tightens and clenches as your second orgasm rips through you.
“Good girl. Good fuckin girl.” Eddie praises as he empties himself into the condom.
After a few moments of the two of you catching your breath and Eddie discarding the used condom, you break the silence.
“I can’t believe we just did that,” you chuckled in disbelief.
“Adam is going to kill me,” Eddie laughed.
“Good, I’ve been meaning to get him back. You roll over to snuggle in his arms.
“And to think you were supposed to be in another man’s bed tonight.” Eddie hated that idea.
“At least I ended up in the right man’s bed.”
Part 2
Tagging those who seemed interested: @lofaewrites @lavendermunson @imyourdaninow @itsfreakingbats @allthingsjoeq
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sleepiexx · 2 months ago
Note
more james x reader PLSSS so good.
maybe even james x fem Slytherin reader
<3
Concussions ‘n Confessions
James Potter x fem!Slytherin Reader
Note: no Voldemort au so you’re besties with the skittles :)
Summary: James quickly realizes his feelings for you— shortly after you’re struck directly in the head with a bludger.
Warnings: Barty beats someone up, mild swearing, corny “hurt her and you die,” line lol
Word count: 2914
Were it any other chaser from any other team, James would have been jumping for joy that a bludger he’d dodged had flew straight past him, nailing an offending chaser right in the head and leaving a rival quidditch team down one player. Hell, it was Slytherin who was down one, bloody Slytherin! But James couldn’t bring himself to be happy, not when that ‘offending chaser’ was none other than poor, sweet you.
You and James met at precisely six o’clock in the morning on the first day of your sixth year, you just tried out and made the Slytherin team after finally succumbing to years of your friends begging you to join and put your flying skills to good use. Despite your initial hesitance towards the sport, you were on the team now, and with your overachieving nature, you had no choice but to practice hard and impress at your first game.
James was on the pitch at that time because he always was. No one else came at six in the morning, so he had the entire arena to himself to practice flying and shooting the quaffle. That was, of course, until the day you came along.
He’d groaned internally when he spotted a green robe in the sky, the last thing he wanted was to have to fight with a Slytherin over the use of the quidditch pitch when all he wanted to do was practice. He mounted his broom and flew towards the figure.
“Hey!” He yelled, startling you. You turned around with a shocked face but smiled once you realized it was just another student come to practice. “How long are you planning on using the pitch?” He asked, a little off-put by the smile you still had on your face despite his red and gold garb.
“I’m planning on staying till lunch, but there’s an extra quaffle down there so we can share the pitch if you’re up for it!”
James had to physically stop his jaw from dropping. You were so nice. What about house rivalry? What happened to the sentiment that all Slytherins were evil?
Maybe you just wanted to watch him practice to steal Gryffindor strategies. Yeah, that was it. No other possible way, Slytherin found out that James Potter practices early and sent out pretty little you to gather information. They had to have known a girl with a face as sweet as yours and an attitude to match was his ultimate weakness.
Regardless, he came out here to practice. He flew down to where you had pointed, where there was, in fact, an extra quaffle. Slytherin had prepared well.
He supposed pace would need to be the main focus of his practice today, you couldn’t watch his strategies if he was moving too fast for you to see. So he whizzed around on his broomstick, shooting goal after goal, curiously looking over his shoulder every once in a while. To his surprise, your focus remained on your own goal post. He sat mesmerized, watching you rehearse.
You weren’t bad, having a talent for the sport that James could tell was natural. You were new, that was clear, not just because James hadn’t seen you on the Slytherin team before, but also because of your lack of confidence. You were hesitating, and if you could just get past that barrier, he knew you would do great.
Screw it. What’s the harm in helping your rival team? If they’re not any good then there’s no glory in beating them at all.
Before he knew it, James found himself flying towards you, stopping a short distance behind you.
“What’s your name?” He asked, half expecting you to startle, as you had before.
You turned your broom gracefully this time, “I’m y/n l/n, you?”
“James Potter. You’re new to the team?”
“You could tell?” Your shoulders sunk, a frustrated pout made its way to your lips.
James' heart dropped, he hadn’t meant to call you out, “no, no it’s not like that. It’s just, well I’m Gryffindor’s captain so I know everyone on every team and I haven’t seen you before.”
You half believed him, still feeling a little insecure but nodding regardless, “yeah, I uhm, haven’t played since I was a kid but I like flying so my friends kinda peer pressured me into joining. I’m trying really hard not to let them down.”
James scoffed, “from what I’ve seen, I doubt you could let them down. But I could give you a pointer or two if you’d like.”
“Would you?”
He nodded in response and you smiled wide.
So began James Potter’s mentorship over you. He’d helped you and even practiced alongside you most mornings. The day of your first game, James was in the stands cheering you on. He had never watched a school quidditch game from the stands, but he found himself giddy watching you absolutely destroy Ravenclaw.
For the first time in his life, he cheered for Slytherin at every game— save for his own against you. Even those, he found, were rather enjoyable because the conclusion he’d originally come to was right, having a harder opponent is much more fun. The stakes were higher and James loved a good thrill.
He loved this arrangement, and he was having so much fun playing against you. Right up until the moment he dodged that stupid bloody bludger that Avery sent hurtling towards him, the lack of interruption leaving it right in the course of your head.
The crack of the ball hitting your head followed by the thud of you falling to the ground was deafening. He sprung into action instantly, shooting towards you and assessing your injuries. You were still half conscious, blinking up at him in pain.
“James?” You asked, voice strained.
“I’m here, love, I’m here. Madam Pomfrey will be here any moment to fix you up.” He held your hand, knowing how badly your head must hurt from taking one of Avery’s notoriously hard bludgers and then free falling from high enough in the sky that muggle medicine likely couldn’t fix the damage to. The whole school was lucky they weren’t resigned to muggle medicine, for Madame Pomfrey’s skills surpassed them leaps and bounds. “Squeeze my hand.”
And you did, a weak grasp that felt so strong to you. James panicked as it loosened even more and your eyes fluttered shut. Madame Pomfrey and some other professors came around with a stretcher, taking you away and leaving James pale in the face. That was the last he had seen of you in a while.
James had tried, on numerous occasions, to visit you in the infirmary with flowers, but he soon found out that your bubbly personality had earned you many friends— many overprotective and scary friends, to specify. Each time he was met with a different one of your Slytherin friends guarding the door as though you had an army of enemies on their way to get you. More realistically, they kept the noise in the hallway down. Protecting you not from armies, but from boisterous students whose loud noise would only worsen your ongoing headaches.
Many first years found out first hand how dedicated they were to protecting the peace, being hexed green after multiple warnings to quiet down. James couldn’t blame them, of course, he would likely do the same were you his to claim, alas, he’d yet to confess his recently realized love for you.
This meant that to your friends, he was nothing more than a threat to the silence you needed. So every time he visited, he was immediately shot down and threatened until he would eventually leave.
He thought he would outsmart your friends, sneak to the infirmary well after visiting hours, hidden under his invisibility cloak. Still, your prefect friend Evan Rosier was sat up against the door, asleep but propped up in a way that anyone entering the room would have to wake him before doing so. Dejected, James turned around and marched back to his dorm room.
The next evening as Remus and Lily rested on the common room couch, quietly reading next to one another whilst Peter laid on the floor, James barged into the common room and disrupted their peace.
James’ eyes met Remus’s and he instantly set his course toward the brunette, stepping over their other friend in the process. “Where is Sirius?” He demanded.
Remus scoffed, “what, no hello? How are you?”
“Or an ‘excuse me Wormtail’?” Peter chimed in.
James shook his head, “no, there’s no time, where is Sirius?”
Remus saw no point in arguing, sighing, “I believe he’s upstairs, combing his hair 152 times on either side.”
James had darted away the moment Remus said Sirius was upstairs, missing the joke and making Remus sigh once more.
“I thought the joke was funny.” Peter comforted.
“Thanks Wormy.”
Much akin to his grand entrance in the common room, James slammed the door to their dorm open. “Padfoot!” He exclaimed.
Sirius, who was seated on the floor— in fact brushing his hair— smiled and turned to his curly headed friend, “what is it you need my dear Prongsy?”
James only met his enthusiasm with desperation. He fell to his knees and placed his palms on either of Sirius’s shoulders, “Regulus is guarding the infirmary right now, you have to convince him to let me in.”
Sirius tried to talk but James cut him off, “Please, mate, I really need to see her and this is my one chance seeing as your brother is guarding her rather than the usual blokes who don’t care at all about my rapport with y/n. We could actually convince him! And before you say no, I’m prepared to do all your charms homework for the next two weeks, just do this one thing for me please, I beg.”
Sirius cracked a grin as James shook his shoulders, “I was going to say yes from the moment you asked, but now that I know there’s charms homework involved, I’ll hold you to it.”
James matched his expression, springing to his feet, pulling Sirius with him. “Alright, I have no idea how long he’ll be the one there so we have to hurry.”
Sirius nodded and they scurried down past the common room, through the portrait hole, and down the halls towards the infirmary.
They stopped at the turn to the infirmary, peeking around the corner to scope it out. Regulus was still there, conjuring silent illusions of rabbits hopping down the hall to fight his readily apparent boredom.
Sirius turned to James, “alright, here’s what’s going to happen: I don’t know for sure if I can convince good ol’ Reggie to let you in, but I do know that I can distract him, so while I do that, you’re going to conjure up some flowers, and when the coast looks clear you are going to rush on in there and you are going to charm the socks off this girl with your devilishly good looks and amazing personality and then you will ask her to be your girlfriend like you’ve always wanted. Got that?”
James nodded solemnly, so Sirius turned and walked casually over to his little brother. The last thing James heard was a “hello sweet, sweet brother of mine” before he focused on getting himself ready.
He conjured some flowers as Sirius had suggested; daisies, he remembered to be your favorite. As the sound of Sirius and Regulus faded down the hall, James took it as his chance to make his break towards you.
Even in the dimmed infirmary, dazed and sore, in a concussed state, you still managed to make James Potter stumble. He forgot where he was and what he was doing the moment your beautiful eyes met his.
“James?” You called out, breaking the boy out of his trance.
“Oh, yes. Hi.” He smiled and waved.
You smiled back, glancing at the flowers in his hands. The action reminded him very suddenly of the task at hand. He rushed to your bedside and held them out toward you, “these are for you.”
You took them, leaning down and smelling the sweet scent. “Thank you, daisies are-”
“Your favorite,” James interjected, “I remember, I knew I couldn’t give you any less than the best since you’re in here because of me.”
You scoffed, “you didn’t put me here.”
He shook his head, “had I not dodged that bludger, you would be fine.”
“I’d say that I don’t blame you but I know you’d just think I was being nice so let me explain it like this: if anyone believed that it was your fault I got hurt, Barty would’ve beaten the shit out of you instead of Avery.”
James’ eyes widened, “that’s what happened to him? Bloody hell, I thought a stray badger had wandered into the castle and attacked him the way he looks.”
“That bad?” You asked, “I only saw Barty’s bloody knuckles from the aftermath, now I’m not so sure that was entirely his blood.”
The two of you laughed softly, smiling when you caught each other’s eyes.
“The flowers aren’t the only reason I’m in here, though.” James said, brushing some hair out of your face.
“Oh?” You prompted him to continue.
He’s clear with his words, “I’ve had this thing for you for a while now, I just haven’t known it. I suppose watching you get hurt like that made me come to that realization, and now that I know, I can’t stand the idea that you don’t know so I guess this is me confessing.”
“You’re into me?” You asked.
James nodded.
Your lips quirked up into a large grin, “holy shit, I should get hit in the head more often this is the best news,” you quietly exclaimed.
James’ expression mirrored your own, “so you feel the same?”
You nodded.
“Well, then I’d like to take you out. And to be your boyfriend, if you’d let me.”
You nodded once more, “I would.”
Everything felt right, you’d both finally aired out your feelings, and you were still all alone in the room so what else would you do but begin leaning in. Your lips nearly touched before the door to the infirmary burst open, James’ long haired friend running towards the both of you in desperation.
“Help me, you have to help me!” He called out.
You winced at the noise, turning to look at James to see if he knew what was going on, he was just as clueless. That is until one Mister Barty Crouch Junior came in, wand raised and ready for use.
“I’ll show you to distract our lookout!” He screamed, a murderous look in his eyes.
Your head throbbed.
Regulus sauntered in soon after, seemingly unbothered. You looked at him confusedly but he merely shrugged.
“Barty.” You said, trying and failing to get his attention as he continued to chase Sirius around the room, “Barty!”
He turned to you.
“Please don’t make me raise my voice again, it hurts.” You whined.
Barty’s face dropped, a guilty look overtaking him.
With that out of the way, you spoke again, “I think Sirius was just trying to help Jamie bring me some flowers.”
“Jamie?” Barty murmured, looking to Regulus to find that he was just as confused.
You wince as you hear Barty’s heavy boots stomping towards you. “Oh dear,” you mutter, “he’s, uhm-“ you try to explain, but you were cut off.
“Your boyfriend?” It’s Regulus who asks, voice impossibly quiet.
You would nod, but moving your head feels like a hazard so you psych yourself up just to say “yeah.”
Barty’s eyes burn with an anger you’ve seen before many times, of all of your overprotective friends, Barty is the worst. It couldn’t possibly help that James is a Gryffindor, not when Barty believes in house rivalry like it’s the Bible.
Barty grabs James by the collar, “I do not like this, nor do I condone it, however, y/n makes her own decisions and I cannot make them for her— regardless of whether or not they are stupid decisions. That being said, you hurt her and you will find your face in worse condition than a bloody troll, understand me?”
James nodded and Barty released his collar, straightening it up, and huffing off elsewhere, taking Regulus with him. Sirius follows suit, if only to give the two of you some much needed privacy.
“Salazar, I thought he was going to kill you,” you breathed out, finally exhaling the breath you were holding the entire time.
James chuckles, taking hold of your hand once more, “just to be clear, love, I would treat you right regardless of there being a threat in place.”
“Well that’s good to hear because you have such a handsome face, I couldn’t bear seeing it bloodied up.” You raised your hand to caress his cheek in emphasis.
An impulsive thought led you to ignore the pounding in your head that came with quick movements, taking your chance to touch your lips to his. You were glad that your friends had left, because the kiss was so nice, you didn’t want it to end. You knew their childish groans would ruin it. But with no interruption, you stayed in the moment for what felt like forever, allowing yourself to bask in the simple joy that was the captain of your rival quidditch team’s lips against your own.
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http-tokki · 6 months ago
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ᰔ pairings: dabi/touya todoroki x fem!reader ᰔ content/tags: mha spoilers, childhood pov, abusive childhoods, childhood crush, blood, allusions to self harm/suicide, explicit language, smut, kinda not really, its smutty talk, angst, allusions to s/a, power dynamics, time jump to when touya is like 26, creative liberties have been taken with the original story, set in the century 2400 ᰔ wc: 10.5k ᰔ a/n: so there is a bit of a weird timeline with this one. instead of touya dying at 13, I've made it he dies at 16 and the subsequent events are a lil delayed, in the manga he is 24 atm but here i have him as 26, please suspend your disbelief for a sec cause the amount of work ive put into this so it makes sense, i almost went crazy
March 10th 2460 Touya: aged nine You: aged eight (and three-quarters)
Breakfast is at five, lunch at twelve, and dinner at seven.
The clock hands tick over the first five graduations and onto the sixth, meaning it is six minutes past seven and dinner is late.
Lateness is not tolerated by the Todoroki clan.
No reason, whether it be big or small, would be accepted nor understood by the head of the family, and punishment for being tardy ranged from groundings to lectures and in the most severe cases, a beating. However, those parameters do not extend to said head, who you think to be more akin to that of a prison warden than a father.
You watch the housekeeper slide the last of the food onto the table and take another look at the clock.
7:08.
The table had been set, food diligently prepared and presented, plates piled high with greens and dripping meat, three different kinds of fish, an array of soups, and other liquid foods. Mrs Todoroki often had trouble eating, so instead opted for warm broths and hot teas, and they were all going cold while you waited for Mr Todoroki to come in from Touya’s nightly training. Saliva coats your tongue as you breathe in the heavenly scents wafting from the mountains of food, your stomach growling in protest at not being filled with the delicious smells.
Ten minutes pass and just before the eleventh has a chance to be observed, the sliding doors to the dining room whoosh open. With the ease and casualness of someone who is above the law of the household, Enji Todoroki strolls in followed closely behind by the eldest sibling.
Touya trails behind his father, movements sluggish and slow, his frail body slumped in exhaustion and what you would only later realise as terror. You can almost see the muck that weighs on his body, dripping off sharp bones in big flat globs of swamp green mud, seeping into the reeds of the tatami mats below. Fresh wounds litter his arms, blooms of dark red blood pock the sterile bandages that were hastily wrapped around his limbs. The stark white began at his wrists and climbed up and up his arms until they disappeared beneath the sleeve of his t-shirt. You follow Touya, eyes lingering on his wounds as he sits down opposite you.
“Fuyumi. Is he-“ Your question is hushed, spoken from the corner of your mouth to avoid raising suspicion of the subject.
“He’s okay, we don’t talk about it.” Her answer comes in a rush, eyes darting towards her father like a prey animal watching their stalker.  “Just eat.” 
Fuyumi’s mouth pulls into a frown for a quick second before her attention moves to the food before her.
You nod, attention shifting from the boy across the table to the plate that had been prepared just for you. A small helping of meat and fish paired with a big serving of rice and vegetables, the nanny even going as far as to put it into a divider plate as though you were a toddler, but you thanked her regardless, smiling up at the haggard-looking woman as she nodded politely and moved onto tending to baby Shouto. The food only holds your attention for so long before you glance back up at Touya, watching as he cuts into his steak with the precision of a man far beyond his years. Each move slow and calculated; every shift of his arms or turn of his head deliberate and purposeful, small actions to avoid raising awareness of his person. Come to think of it, all the children, save for Shouto, moved like that. As if they were in constant apologetic states just for breathing, existing, and with their father you understand why, but it doesn’t stop you from staring at the boy before you.
"Stop looking. He doesn't like it when you stare." Fuyumi whispers, smacking her knee against yours.
"But it looks like it hurts." You whisper back, unable to look away from the red splotches on the white bandages.
You want to ask if he is okay. If he needs a doctor and who did that to him? Was it a bully at school? How was the school not getting involved if he was being bullied this bad?
"Fuyumi," Touya sneers from across the table. "Tell your friend to stop staring at me."
Unabashed hatred simmers in his blue eyes as his glare falls on you. Heat rises to your cheeks, stumbling out an apology, and vowing to never look at him again.
No one had ever looked at you like that. With such hatred and malice, you didn’t even know existed.
"He plays rough, always falling over at school," Mr. Todoroki’s voice booms throughout the room, so loud and sudden it is like a thunderclap on a clear day. "You've got to be more careful, Touya. What would people think if they saw you like this!"
The lack of care for his son’s well-being gives you pause mid-bite. The vegetables fall from your fork as goosebumps skitter along your skin.
What would people think if they saw you like this?
What would they think other than he had been in an accident? Is Touya’s broken body a regular occurrence that people would be so used to seeing that it would start to raise suspicion? Had he been hurt on purpose? Why would Mr. Todoroki say that? Did Mr. Todoroki do that to Touya?
Your attention is pulled outwardly as Natsuo starts to talk about his day, telling his mom and the housekeepers all about the latest games and toys at school, the newest edition of a card game you like captivates you and your thoughts are swept away from the strange boy across from you. 
Dinner ended as it always did.
Mr. Todoroki called the housekeeper over to deal with the mess and children as he retired to his office and Mrs Todoroki took her evening walk around the grounds of the estate. You can’t stay the night despite it being a Friday, you’re never allowed to stay the night. Fuyumi had stayed at yours plenty of times, your parents never saying no to another friend but never you at hers. You thanked both her parents and waved bye to her brother before the youngest housekeeper walked you home. That’s how every Friday night ended.
That routine had become a staple in your life, going on two years, before there was a change to the way of things.
------
July 1st 2362 Touya: aged eleven You: aged ten
The shift was subtle and gradual, like the way a house is warmed by a fire on a winter’s eve. Slow and steady, seeping into all corners of the once-frozen house until all you know is warmth and you can’t remember how the cold felt. That’s how you would describe Touya’s presence in your life. From the arctic interactions each Friday night at the dinner table to someone you would call a friend.
The first thaw of the ice wall that had formed around your friend’s brother, was an accident.
Knee deep in the heat of summer, you had rushed over after summer school, swimmers in your backpack and a dream of jumping into the fresh cold heaven that was the local pool. You had come looking for Fuyumi, hell-bent on getting your poor friend out of the stuffy old house and somewhere she could have fun without the risk of her dad making her or her siblings cry.
You had come to hate Mr Todoroki.
He hadn’t done anything to you personally to deserve the contempt you held towards your friend's dad but you had heard enough from Fuyumi. She had told you all the times he made her mom cry. How there would be arguing and then the sounds of breaking plates followed by her mom’s cries. Mrs. Todoroki never said anything was wrong, never alluded to anything other than a mild argument but there had to be something more, right? Adults didn’t cry over nothing!
“ ‘Yumi, let's go to the pool!” you call down the hall. “I’ll buy ice cream this time.”
The housekeeper had let you in, instructing that your friend was in her room finishing up some school work but after you checked her room and found no sign of her, you went looking.
That is how you found Touya.
Walking into the bathroom under the assumption you would find Feyumi, you are greeted with a situation you are not old enough to understand the severity of.
Touya slouched on the bathroom floor, surrounded by bloodied towels, unspooled bandages, and uncapped ointment tubes. A piece of gauze caught between his teeth as he attempts to bandage his bleeding hand.
He shouts at you to leave, his command broken as he hiccups around the sobs falling from him. Scorched skin covering the majority of his arms, fingers red and blistering as they shake.
That image sears into your brain. Imprinting itself onto your eyelids so that each time you fall asleep, you see Touya; broken and bloody.
There isn’t much you remember from that afternoon, only flashes and stills that live in the recesses of your mind.
The feel of the cold tiles on your exposed legs as you knelt before the once terrifying older boy who had never had a single nice thing to say to you.
The smell of salt and metal of his fresh blood.
The sound of Touya’s cries as you peeled incorrectly placed bandages off raw and exposed skin.
The acidic taste of bile in the back of your throat upon first laying eyes on the scene before you.
It had been too much for little you to comprehend so you just forgot most of it. Thrown it into a locked drawer in your mind and lost the key.
That was the beginning of the thaw, a gruesome and bloody beginning to a friendship that spanned years and ended just as horribly.
------
September 23rd 2463 Touya: aged twelve You: aged eleven
“So it's this really old movie that my mum used to watch” you explain as you click on the familiar title screen. “It’s about a girl who gets transported to this weird world and she has to solve some weird riddle to get out.”
Touya looks at you like you had grown a second head but accepts your weird movie recommendation. You sit down next to him, popcorn bucket jiggling as the couch sinks under your frame.
The beginning animation of Spirited Away starts and the familiar tune wraps around you like a warm hug. This was the movie you liked to watch whenever you felt sad, and you noticed Touya was a little sadder than normal these days so you offered to have a movie night. His siblings had all said yes but upon discovering that the movie was one from decades ago, backed out. So with just the two of you left, you sit in silence and watch as the beautiful world comes to life.
It’s a nice moment between the two of you, sharing something so personal with someone you would have never considered a friend and here the two of you were, watching a movie. Like friends!
“I’m gonna call you Chihiro cause all she does is cry and that’s all you do too,” Touya announces as the credits begin to roll.
“I do not!” you retort, slapping his arm lightly. “I cry a normal amount for a girl my age!”
Touya rolls his eyes. “Whatever, Chihiro.”
------
February 14th 2464 Touya: aged thirteen You: aged twelve
Spring is only a month away yet it feels as if it were the middle of December.
The cold of winter had sunk its claws deep into the city and it seemed as if it did not have plans to let go of it anytime soon. Everyone in Tokyo bundled up against the frost that coated the wind but it wasn’t the cold that had your hands trembling as you gripped a single rose.
It was Valentine's Day and you were about to ask Touya to be yours.
The nerves that had built in your stomach had taken over your extremities. It was as if your entire body was a live wire that every so often touched an exposed pipe and jolted.
In the two years since the bathroom incident, you had grown closer to the oldest Todoroki, sparking a friendship that consisted of more than smiles and shy hellos across the dinner table. Phone calls and text messages were the daily, walking to school and home together was the new norm, all things that one would consider friendly but there was a part within your heart that was growing to like Touya a little more than a friend. You knew it was a crush, you weren’t a little kid anymore, but you also knew that he was unattainable for many reasons. One was that he was a sibling of a close friend and the other being that he was not someone who thought about life that way. There was no room for crushes in Touya’s world. There was only hero work. How to become a hero and then how to become the number one hero.
You had heard this speech a million times. His plans to surpass his father in the rank of heroes and become the ultimate symbol of peace. Heroes had no time for girlfriends, only villains.
But you had no plans of becoming a hero so there was no real reason you shouldn’t try, right? Your mom had bought you the flower this morning, picking up on the crush that you had developed on your friend and very excitedly pushed you to give Touya a gift.  
“What do I do with this?” Touya asks, confused as he takes the flower from your hands.
You had stopped halfway through the walk home and turned to your friend, eyes wide with fear, and shoved the bloom into his hands. Originally the plan was to hand it to him as you said goodbye for the afternoon but you were swiftly running out of ways to regulate your breathing to counteract the anxiety wreaking havoc in your stomach.
“It's for you” you answer, eyes trained on your shoes. 
“Me?” 
“Yes.”
“Are you asking me to be your valentine?” There is a pause. “Do you like me?”
Yes.
“No!” you lie, shouting the word even though you didn’t mean to. “I felt bad that you hadn’t gotten anything, so I got you something and there you go, it doesn’t mean I like you.”  
You hear footsteps, watching Touya’s shoes move closer to yours. “Just admit, you like me.” He teases. 
“I do not!” balling your fists, you stomp your foot. “I already told you why I got them now shut up before I take them back!” 
Another pause. 
“Thank you,” Touya says gently. “Even if it's just cause you felt bad for me” 
Spring had come early for Touya Todoroki.
------
June 28th 2466 Touya: aged fifteen You: aged fourteen
Romance had blossomed between the two of you, then wilted, then blossomed again, then wilted again.
Teenage hormones had been unleashing havoc on your friendship for the past year. One day you were fine and the next, barely speaking but it wasn’t anyone’s fault.
“You two just need some time apart and then you can talk about it, you guys will sort it out.” Your mother had cooed, stroking your hair back as you cried one afternoon after you and Touya had had a ruthless argument.
The topic of fighting was always the same. His insane need to overtake his father and prove him wrong. The need within him had turned insatiable. Morphing from a dream that would one day be achieved with dedication and hard work into something that was turning your best friend into a ravenous beast.
“You’re not listening to me. I need you to listen to me.” Touya shouts as you walk home together.
“I am. You’re just not making sense.” You roll your eyes at your friend, turning your attention away from the raving lunatic walking beside you.
“Why would your dad have it out for you? He’s your dad?”
Touya huffs and stops, hand wrapping around your wrist to pull you back.
“My dad isn’t like your dad. He doesn’t love me or any of us. He just wants us to be better than All Might.” His words are slow as if explaining something to a toddler. “He knows that I am more powerful than him and now he’s scared that I might beat him so he wants me to stop training.”
You groan out his name, annoyed at the constant conversation topic. “Your dad wants you to stop training because you keep hurting yourself. He has told you that a million times, he’s just trying to keep you safe.”
“If he wanted to keep me safe, he wouldn’t have let me train like this. This isn’t about me being safe, this is about me outranking my dad.”
“Touya-“
He continues his tirade. “Enji has realised that I am better than him and Shoto but he doesn’t want his loser son who can only use fire to become the number one hero. I don’t know why you’re on his side. Why can’t you be on my side for once?”
“I am on your side!” you shout, yanking your arm away from his grasp. “I’m always on your side, why do you always make it seem like everyone is against you!”
Touya’s mouth snaps shut at your sudden outburst.
“I can’t keep having this argument with you. I feel like you don’t even want to be my friend so you come up with this stupid stuff to push me away and if you want that, fine. Just tell me so I don’t have to listen to you anymore.” You huff and turn around, starting on your way home without your friend.
You don’t hear his footsteps follow you.
His apology comes in a text later that night.
I'm sorry, Chihiro. Can we still be friends?
------
October 19th 2466 Touya: aged fifteen You: aged fourteen “Can you promise me something?”  Touya’s words become mist in the mid-autumn night.
“Depends.”
You turn to face your friend, feeling the dew-soaked grass squish beneath your shoulders. Hidden behind the garden wall, lost within the shrubbery the two of you hid from the housekeepers who had been tasked with wrangling the children in for dinner. Touya had run first, taking off down the hall the second he heard the call of his name and you followed, unaware as to what you were running from but you followed him everywhere so why wouldn’t you now?
“Please don’t forget me.”
“Forget you?” your brows crinkle in confusion. “Why would I forget you? Are you going somewhere?”
Touya is still on his back, attention rapt on the stars twinkling above him.
“Just when we get older and go to different schools and things change, you know.” He sighs. “Just don’t forget me.”
You sit up, concern overtaking your confusion. Why was he talking about this stuff now? Your friend turns to look at you, mouth pulled down in a frown as tears line his cerulean eyes.
“I won't.” You shake your head, scooting closer across the grass and grab his cold hand, interlocking your fingers together, you squeeze and swear an oath. “I promise, I won’t ever forget you.”
November 24th 2367 Touya: aged sixteen You: aged fifteen
Nights come quicker in winter.
Which means less time spent with Touya.
But at least there is a little extra time when he walks you home on an evening.
It is a little awkward. Walking so close together but not actually touching aside from the occasional brush of fingers that sent your heart into a sprint. There is something unspoken between the two of you, something that teeters on the edge of romance but not something that you are both ready to dive into. It’s not like you are kids anymore, if you are going to date, it will be different than if you just liked each other. You will have to act like a girlfriend and not his friend and you didn’t know how to be a girlfriend. Was it any different than how you acted now? Plus, kissing and hand-holding. God, you want to kiss him.
You both stop at the gate of your house. The lights in the living room are on which means your parents are up waiting for you.
Touya drops your backpack at your feet.
There is a beat of stillness between the two of you, the tension rising with every second. You had not spoken a single word to each other the entire walk home and you don’t think you will even say goodbye. Touya offers you a tight smile and steps back, confirming your suspicions of a silent goodbye.
"Hey, I need to tell you something." You blurt out the words, not wanting him to leave just yet.
"Yeah?"
"I…umm," you stammer, slipping your hands into your jacket pockets. "I know it's your birthday in a few weeks, so I wanted to know what you want as a present."
"That's a question, Chihiro” Touya's mouth lifts at the corners. “You said you needed to tell me something."
“I got mixed up." You amend.
"You sure? There isn't anything you need to tell me?" Touya pushes, taking a step to close the gap.
"I'm sure. I just got confused" You nod, affirming your choice of words. “What do you want as a gift?”
"Hmm,” He pauses and takes a few more steps closer, lips pursed as if deep in thought. “Well, I want some of those cookies your mom makes." 
Touya stops a few feet from you, close enough for a hug but not close enough that it was weird. 
You laugh. "Really? That's it? You don't want a proper present?"
He nods. "Wrap it up, and it'll be a proper present.”
“Okay, cookies it is” You mirror his nod and smile. Your palms start to sweat, cheeks and ears begin to burn as you look up at your best friend.
“Any more questions?” 
You shake your head. “Nope, that’s all.” 
“Okay, well I’m gonna go 'cause I should have been home ten minutes ago but you are such a slow walker” he teases, bouncing up on his toes. 
“I-Um,” you stutter, unable to come up with a snappy comeback due to his proximity. “Go home before you get into trouble.” 
“I’m gonna.”
He makes no move to go.
Silence fills the gap.
“Ahh, well I’m going to go since-“
You’re interrupted by a soft kiss against your cheek. 
You still, unable to move at the realisation that Touya had just kissed you. 
“Okay, I’m going.” He announces and takes a step back. “I’ll see you on Monday?” 
You nod, raising a hand in goodbye as he starts back down the street.
“I hope you like me too, 'cause that kiss made me late and my dad’s gonna kill me!” he shouts back, already halfway down the street. 
“I do…like you…back” you shout awkwardly, feeling every inch of blood your body had flood into your cheeks. “Good luck. Hope your dad doesn't kill you!” 
------
November 30th 2467 Touya: aged sixteen You: aged fifteen
You speak at Touya’s funeral. 
The third speaker of the ceremony, having been urged on by Fuyumi and Natsuo despite your protests, and the one to close off the day before his ashes were taken home. You tried not to cry, bottom lip wobbling all day and you would have made it had you not been shoved on stage, microphone held to your face as you unfolded the crumpled sheet you had stuffed into the pocket of your coat.
The rest of the day was a blur as was the week,  then the month and only after six full months of grieving daily, crying god only knows how much, did you finally start to see the light at the top of the hole you had buried yourself in but unlike the times you and Touya would play together, his warm hand wasn’t there to help you back up.
------
January 4th 2477 Touya: aged sixteen You: aged twenty-five
You think about Touya Todoroki often.
How your best friend had been killed in some freak accident. How despite his father rushing into the flames to save his son, had come out unscathed yet all that was found was Touya’s jaw bone. It didn’t make sense and you had driven yourself crazy with theories surrounding his death. It was an accident, they had all said. Even if it was an accident, Enji Todoroki was not innocent.
You think about the kind of man Touya could have been if he had lived, what kind of hero he would have become. How he would save the day then turn and smile at his adoring fans, blue eyes blazing bright with pride. You often think about his eyes, remembering how they softened whenever he would smile at you, brighten as you offered half of whatever snack bar you had that day. You think about him enough that you think you’re going crazy when you look up into the eyes of a stranger and see Touya staring back at you.
"Touya?" you whisper as you stare at the strange man.
You had walked headfirst into their chest while crossing the dark street, ducking under awnings to avoid the winter rain. Hoping to cut ten minutes from your usual walk home, desperate to beat your roommate home and into the warm embrace of your apartment’s limited hot water, you took the risk of walking down the alley; what you weren’t hoping for was to bump into your best friend’s dead brother. There was no way it was him, maybe he was a distant Todoroki. Enji did seem like the type to spread it around so maybe a few illegitimate children were running around with the eyes of Endeavour.
His hand reaches out to grab your arm, nails digging into your exposed flesh. You want to wince, to cringe away from him but something within you is telling you to hold your ground. The stranger pulls you closer, all false bravado leaving you as you realise what’s about to happen. Your body tenses, hands uselessly curling into fists at your side.
"Who the fuck are you?" a harsh whisper cuts through the quiet patter of rain.
The hand your arm tightens when you take too long to respond. 
“I’m sorry, I thought you were someone else.” Your answer whooshes from you, all air leaving your body in a single sentence.
The stranger ducks his head to get closer to yours and you turn your face away, afraid to look into the face of the man who had the eyes of a long-lost love. This had to be some sort of joke, right? You were not about to be assaulted by a guy who had Touya’s eyes, there was no way the universe was that cruel.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to I’m sorry, please.” Hot tears roll over your cheeks, your bottom lip quivering as you fight the frown wanting to form. You were not above begging despite knowing it wouldn’t do any good, if there was some way to get out of this situation alive and unscathed, you were going to try it. 
“Hey,” the stranger calls to you, shaking you gently. “Hey, I’m not gonna hurt you.” 
Great, he’s playing mind games now. You’ve seen enough true crime to know that there are no good people left in the world, especially the ones who lurk in alleyways.
A cold hand reaches out and grips your chin, lifting your face to his. The gesture is intimate, gentle and familiar.
“I’m sorry, I really didn’t mean anything by it. I'm sorry, I-“You’re sobbing now. 
“Look at me” he interrupts, fingers tightening on your cheeks.
He repeats his order when your gaze doesn’t move.
You sniffle, blink back tears that refuse to stop coming, and focus your attention on the man before you.
“I’m not going to hurt you so stop crying,” his voice is soft.
The hand that was on your arm now cups your cheek, thumb brushing away the tears that coat your cheeks. His skin is rough and warm, but there is a bite of something cold on his palm. He holds you with such tenderness you feel a tug at your heart not for any feelings towards the stranger but because you had never been held like this before. That a complete stranger who was probably a crazy psycho villain was holding you with the care you hold a baby animal with.
“I need you to stop crying and answer me, can you do that?” he asks, nodding as his thumb continues to brush over your cheek. 
You nod, taking in a shaky breath. 
“Good girl.” Heat floods your cheeks. “Now, why is a pretty girl like you walking alone at night?” he asks softly.
You blink up at him, surprised at the switch in demeanour. 
“I just finished work and this is shortcut.” you don’t have time to come up with an elaborate lie. “I’m really sorry about the whole name thing, you just look like a friend who died and I thought that maybe he wasn’t actually- I’m sorry” You feel the tears welling up again. 
“Well, he’s not me.” He sighs, removing his hands from your face. You kind of miss the warmth they had. “I’m sorry you lost someone, but I don’t think accusing strangers of being dead people is a good idea.”
You nod wordlessly, too stunned at his shift in tone to formulate a response. The man reaches up for the hood of your raincoat, pulling it over your head tight to shield you from the rain. 
“I need one more thing from you okay?” he asks, ducking his head to look into your eyes. “You gonna listen to me again?” 
“Okay.” Your voice shakes. 
“Don’t mention that name to anyone else, alright?” 
He waits for your nod and then releases your hood. “You’re such a good listener” The fact he is praising you has your heart spinning. Wasn’t he ready to attack you a few minutes ago?
“Now go home” he nods his head to the exit of the alleyway. You follow his nod and look back at the light-filled street. “And don’t walk down backstreets anymore, you could get hurt.” 
By the time you turn back to face him, he is already halfway down the alleyway arms raised in a farewell. You watch as he turns the corner and only when he is gone do you let yourself breathe. ------
March 6th 2477 Touya: aged sixteen You: aged twenty-five
"Let it go, dude," Natsuo sighs for the umpteenth time as he packs his books away. "You're lucky you didn't get hurt. He could have been a complete psycho."
Your friend is right and has been every other time you have brought up the strange man from the alley and you can tell by the way he shoves the textbooks into his backpack that his patience is running thin. Over the years, you had grown closer to Natsuo, looking at him like a little brother who you could force to hang out with and do things Fuyumi didn't want to. Unfortunately for him, he was the first person you called upon meeting the stranger (Knowing Fuyumi would have had a heart attack upon hearing about your encounter). Initially, Natsuo was concerned, terrified for your physical and mental wellbeing even going so far as to suggest letting his father know about the incident to launch a formal investigation but you were quick to shut that down. You hadn’t been hurt and the man didn’t seem to be skulking in alleyways to assault anyone so there is no reason you should get heroes involved.
"Dude, he looked so familiar! I know him," you press on, hands splayed on the library table as you lean in as if you were about to reveal a secret. "I think he was a childhood friend."
You had purposefully omitted the fact the stranger bore a striking resemblance to his dead brother or how his entire aura radiated familiarity and warmth something you only really felt from said brother.
Natsuo laughs and zips his bag closed. " 'Yumi was your only childhood friend."
"Fine, a neighbour, maybe I don't know, but I know him."
"Should I schedule you with my family psych, or will this fade by next month?" You frown at Natsu, sigh, and then give in to his pronounced lack of interest.
"I don't need to see anyone because I know I'm right," you start to pack up your things. "But, just for you, I won't mention it again."
------
May 17th 2477 Touya: aged sixteen You: aged twenty-five
You feel stupid.
Really fucking stupid.
So monumentally stupid with every single decision that has led you to this moment. Led you to stand before a thick metal door, the sliding peephole pulled back to allow the man guarding the entry a view as to who knocked like some girl scout. The box of cookies in your hands does nothing to evade that image.
“I have a meeting with…Dabi?” you look down at your phone, squinting at the blurry name on your screen then back to the man guarding whatever was in that building. “I think.”
You have no idea if you’re being set up. If the person you had been corresponding with was the infamous villain or just some poser but what you have deduced from your months long investigation is that you had in fact met Dabi in that alleyway so whether it was him or not you were about to meet, he is your only lead into finally figuring out what exactly happened to Touya
“You think?” You hear the smirk in his voice at the uncertainty in yours. “I think you might have the wrong door, sweetheart.”
It is the right door. The creepy encrypted message you received gave you this very location with the exact time to arrive. This was a giant risk on your behalf. Trusting strangers on the internet to give you accurate information as opposed to being lured into a trap for human trafficking but the need to know more about the mysterious man you had met weeks ago was gnawing at your insides so much that you were more need than person. The hunt had begun with a very broad search into Touya’s death and the records surrounding the tragedy before very quickly veering into villain records and archives. There was a small lead with a hospital admittance for an unidentified burn victim in a hospital a prefecture over from Tokyo but that went cold when the body of the patient was identified two weeks post mortem through dental records. You had all but given up when a weird email in your spam box caught your eye. It was from an unknown sender, hence the immediate spam allocation, and had nothing but a link to a chat site. There is no amount in the universe to quantify the stupidity in your subsequent actions from clicking the link to chatting with the stranger on the other side of the screen but they had the information you wanted and so you followed their instructions to a bookstore, then a bar and then finally an internet café where you logged into the already open discord chat that had the location of the final meeting point. You quickly snapped a picture of the chat before it disappeared and three days later, here you stand in a deserted alleyway surrounded by boarded-up doors and graffitied walls.
“This is the address I was given.” You explain, holding up the phone so the guy can get a look at the message. “I promise I'm not with the police or anything, I just have some questions for Dabi and I know that makes me sound like I’m a police officer but I’m not and I’ve been looking for him for weeks so please, let me in.”
Your mouth sets in a frown and despite wanting to look intimidating and rough, you know you look like a child pouting in an attempt to get more cake. “Please, I’ll give you some cookies if you want.” A shitty bribe but a bribe nonetheless.
The man snorts. “You really have cookies in that box?”
“Yes. Fresh and homemade made and some of them can be yours if you let me in” You wiggle the box.
There is a beat of silence then the sliding peephole slams shut.
Fuck.
You close your eyes, disappointed in the fact you had come so far only to be shut down by some guy behind a door. Maybe this was the universe stepping in and preventing you from getting killed or trafficked. Maybe you should let this whole thing go.
Just as the last of your hope leaves you, you hear the click of a lock and then the door is sliding open. The man who you had been speaking to not ten seconds ago stands before you, muscular tattooed arms crossed over his equally muscular chest.
“Choc chip?” he asks, eyes trained on the box in your hand.
You nod.
“Fine, come in” The man tilts his head in a gesture to welcome you in. “Leave some on the counter.”  
You nod again, your pace quick as you enter the building beyond the door.
The hallway is dim and damp, filled with cardboard and wooden crates stacked along the walls. The ceilings are high with exposed piping and hanging fluorescent bars that would have once lit up the entire walkway. Light bleeds beneath the many doors that line the hall, muted sounds following the flashes of colour that leak from the closed-off rooms. The smell is unpleasant, with mildew and mould growing along every available surface but what did you expect a dirty unoccupied building to smell like?
“Where’s the?” you turn to ask about the counter, but the man has disappeared. The door slides shut caging you in from the outside world, from an escape if need be. “Hello?” you call out and take a step back, dried leaves crunching beneath your feet.
Fuck. Fuck.
You turn on your heels, heading for the door you had stepped through a few seconds ago but are stopped by a familiar voice.
“Did you really bring me cookies?”
You whirl, fingers tightening on the box between them. “Yes, but if you don’t want them, it’s okay. I just thought that I might-“
You watch as the man you had met weeks before steps into the dim light. Breath catches in your throat as you are met with the face of the villain that has filled your screen for weeks now.
Dabi.
He is taller than you remember. Towering a full foot over you, his intimidating figure looms in the dim light. Your eyes follow the line of his scarred skin over his cheeks, down his neck, over exposed collarbones before disappearing beneath the neck of his shirt. Heat fills your face at your wandering gaze and you’re thankful for the lack of lighting.
“Who says I don’t want cookies?” Dabi smirks, taking a step out of the shadows.
“No one.” your answer is a broken stammer, earning a bemused snicker from your companion.
You take in a breath and square your shoulders. “I just don’t want to accuse you of anything.” A better delivery.
The villain hums and takes another step closer. “So, it is you then.”
Another foot closer, and when you don’t back away, one more. His steps are careful; small and reserved as if trying not to frighten you anymore than you already are. The routine is repeated, a hesitant dance of pushing proximity limits until he is less than a foot away. Blue eyes narrowed on you, brows furrowed in intrigue. Same blue as before. Same blue eyes as Touya.
His apprehension and fascination leave as quickly as it came, and you're left staring at a man who looks as if he wants nothing more to do with you.
“So, pretty girl, what can I do for you?” tone casual, pet name rolling off his tongue effortlessly. “You’ve gone through all this trouble to what?”
The thought of lying did cross your mind on your way over but you had already jumped through enough loops to get this meeting, you aren’t in the mood to play games and risk his irritation.
“I wanted to talk to you about something.”
Dabi tilts his head to the side the way an animal does to hear better. There is something so unsettling about the he moves, something not entirely human.
“Talk about what, angel?” his eyes blaze blue as he notices the twitch in your lips at the byname. “About the league? About you? Me?”
“About you.”
Heat pools in your stomach at his affectionate pet name, embarrassment following suit. You should not be letting him get to you the way he is, but it could also be a good bargaining chip. If you couldn’t afford his services monetarily, physical payment would not be entirely painful.
“We can talk about me but first, I want to ask you something.”
“Sure.” The false confidence you had summoned before has not left you yet.
The insincerity of your act is palpable, but Dabi lets you go, lets you take this small win.
“How long did it take you to find me?” his question is genuine, interested in just how exclusive access to him is.
An exhausted sigh leaves your body at the mention of the time that you had put into locating him and his lips quirk at the gesture.
“Four months and 2 weeks, I think.”
An irrationally long time but there are questions that demanding answers.
“So, you’ve spent almost five months thinking about me?” he taunts.
Me. The emphasis on the pronoun doesn’t evade you but you don’t have time to dwell on his excitement.
“Yes. And now I’ve answered two of your questions, can I ask one?”
Dabi shrugs and reaches for the box in your hands. Rough fingers brush against the back of your hands, goosebumps skittering over your skin at the contact. He takes his time opening the small white box, bottom lip pulled between his teeth in contemplation at the contents before him and after a full minute of silent deliberation, does he pick one. Slender unscarred fingers dig into the box, fishing out the biggest and most chocolate filled treat.
“Did you make these?” Dabi holds up the choc chip cookie, inspecting the biscuit in the low light.
“That’s three questions now.” you announce as the unofficial score keeper. “and yes, I made them this morning.”
The making of the desserts had been a coping mechanism on your part. Too nervous to sit still but not so overstimulated you were willing to exercise to shake off the extra energy, you turned to an activity you hadn’t touched since university. The recipe was one you know by heart, having it gifted to you by your mother on your eighteenth birthday, you were free to think as your body worked through the motions. However, the purpose behind you baking said sweets was not entirely self-soothing.
Dabi nods and bites into the biscuit.
“I know you already said you don’t know the guy I mentioned when I first met you and I haven’t mentioned him to anyone again just like you asked me, and I figured with you being a villain, you might have connections that I don’t have and you can access more information as to what happened to him and I promise that I can pay. I’ll pay whatever you want but I don’t really have that much but I’ll pay in food, and that’s kinda why I brought some cookies to show that I can bake but that will only be a small amount because I’m good for a couple thousand-“ you reach into your back pocket to fish out your wallet. “I promise, I won't ever mention this to anyone, but I just really need your help, Dabi.” The juxtaposition of your pastel purple Kuromi wallet holding thousands of dollars as payment for a villain’s services almost makes you chuckle but the lack of recognition from your companion causes you to pocket the purse.
Dabi’s stare is unamused as he chews.
“Why is this guy so important to you?” he asks around a mouthful of chocolate. “You’re willing to blow thousands on some dead guy, not to mention you’ve risked your life coming here, so why is he so special?”
Your fingers curl into a fist, nails digging into your palm before you relax and answer.
“Because he died in a really weird way, and I need to know if there was anything I could have done to prevent it.”
“That’s a stupid reason.” Dabi spits out.
A frown tugs at your mouth.
“He’s dead. Who cares how he died and whether you could stop it or not.” He continues, rolling his eyes as your pout forms. “What’s the real reason you’re looking for answers? There’s something else.”
“It’s stupid.” You mutter, suddenly embarrassed at the reasoning for your investigation.
“Ohh, it can’t be that stupid if you’ve put all this effort in.” Dabi croons. “Come on, angel. You’ve gotta tell me why if I’m gonna do all this work looking for him.”
You take in a deep breath in hopes of smothering the tears that are threatening to spill but the lump sticking in your throat has other plans.
“Because he was my best friend and I loved him and I never got to say goodbye.” You sniff, nose starting to run as the tears build. “Please.”
Dabi stares at you.
“You made these?” the question comes out of left field.
You blink at the villain, unaware as to where he is taking the conversation but answer him nonetheless.
“Yes, I did. It’s stupid I know, bringing cookies as a bargaining chip but I-“
“Your mom’s cookies are better.”  Dabi interrupts.
My what? My mom?
“What?”
He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. “I’m sorry but her cookies will always be the best.”
Your jaw slackens as you stare at the man before you.
“My mother?”
“Yes. Your mom made better cookies, and it’s not for lack of trying. Yours are really good, but they’ll never beat your mom's.”
Is he fucking with you? Is this some elaborate psychological warfare that he enacted on all his victims? Are you about to die? How does he know about your mother’s cookies?
“Aww, don’t get upset Chihiro. I'm just being honest.”
The nickname rattles your soul.
Touya.
Before you can even register that you are moving, you have crossed the space between your bodies and swung at the villain.
Your clenched fist collides with his jaw, surprising him out of his teasing. Arms wrap around your waist as you collapse against the villain. Your knees break the fall, bones scream out in pain as they slam into the concrete, and you brace for further impact but it never comes. There is a moment when you truly believe you are going to be killed, incinerated into nothing but ash for your assault but nothing happens and so you are left with no other choice but to get answers from the man under you. There is no clear choice as to why you chose violence, some primal part within you acting out of instinct. There isn’t enough time for you brain to catch up or even process that information that had been thrown at you. . In most high-pressure situations, you would retreat inwards and carefully unpack each and every detail of the occurrence like you were a kid under a Christmas tree; not a package left untouched, but you don’t have that luxury in the current moment.
Hot fat tears stream down your face as you grip Dabi’s cheeks in your hand, his skin rough beneath your fingers.
“You’ve been alive this whole time?” you cry, fingers digging into the gaunt flesh and when no answer comes you ask again, the palm of your hand connecting with his cheek in a sharp slap. “You left me to think you were dead, but you’ve been alive?”
Below you, the villain stares up in disbelief. Eyes wide at the mad woman above him, screeching like a banshee let loose. His thin shirt is scrunched tightly between your fingers, pulling the material taunt against his body. You have no control over your actions, feral and bowing to your emotions. You watch as your hand slips to his neck, pushing at the base of his throat.
Finger wraps around your wrist, pulling your weight off his windpipe and then the world shifts.
You are flipped over as easily as a leaf in the wind. Now on your back, the dust that had been kicked up from the floor sticks in your lungs and you cough as you cry.
Dabi hovers above you. Legs on either side of your hips, hands pinning yours above your head preventing you from causing any more harm to him. You try to kick, to wrench your hands from his grasp, throw him off you with your hips but nothing. You fight back against your opponent, teeth gnashing as you desperately try to find purchase on skin but he has done this too many times before to leave anything to chance. All points of access to an injury on his behalf are sealed up, held high above you and there is nothing you can do to reach.
Your cries are loud and deep and aching. Air leaves you with each heaving sob and you fear you may never breathe again. Spit and tears mix in a hot mess across your cheeks and you would wipe away the mess if not for your hands held above.
“I hate you so much.” You seethe, teeth clenched as you breathe in. “I fucking hate you.”
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” You hear Dabi apologising over and over again.
A hand brushes over your forehead, then your cheeks, then your jaw.
“You left me.” You wail. “You left me there, all alone.”
Your chest heaves, air being gulped down as if you had been held underwater to the point of drowning and it felt like you had been. You had been held under for so many years and now you were getting a moment of air, and your brain could not process it. 
You take a few more breaths, calming the blood roaring in your ears and pounding heart and finally when your breathing returns to a semi-acceptable rhythm, do you finally acknowledge the man above you.
Dabi glides his palm along your jaw, thumb brushing over your cheekbone before resting his fingers along the side of your neck.
“I’m so sorry.”
A frown pulls at the corners of his mouth.
There is no longer a villain before you. Dabi does not exist. The boy above you is Touya. Your Touya.
You knew it. You knew it was him all along.
“Is it really you?” your voice is hoarse from crying.
“If I answer, you need to promise to keep it a secret,” he whispers, free hand curling in the ends of your hair that lay splayed out beneath you.
“Promise.” You nod and hold out your pinkie the way you did so many times as children.
Touya interlocks his pinkie with yours.
Fresh tears prick at your eyes.
“Hi, Touya,” you whisper.
“Hi.” He whispers back, hand pulling away from yours to glide over your jaw and slot into the hair at the nape of your neck. “I missed you.”
You wrap your arms around his waist and pull his body against yours in a bone-crushing hug. A laugh leaves your friend as he loops his arm around the back of your neck, holding you close. You pull back, face now centimetres from him and wait for him to make the next move. Your body follows his breaths, following his lead just the way you would follow him all those years ago. A lump forms in your throat and you know you look insane; hair mused, cheeks flushed and soaked in tears, eyes still red and crying.
Touya closes the distance, mouth hovering above yours and you think he is going to kiss you but nothing comes.
“Did you really love me?”
A sob leaves you involuntarily.
“I loved you so much, you have no idea.” The truth spills from you. “I love you so much.”
At the confession, Touya kisses you.
His mouth is soft on yours in the gentlest of kisses, almost as if he was afraid that you would fall apart if he pushed any harder. You part your lips to test the waters and when Touya follows your lead opening his mouth against yours, you grip onto the shirt bunched up around his waist. He lets you lead, lets you take control and set the pace for the first few minutes. Following your moves and pressure against your body to not push you any more than you already had been but as you whimper beneath him, his demeanour shifts.
Fingers tighten in your hair and the hand that had been holding himself up comes to rest on your waist, slipping beneath your body to pull you closer to him. Your mouth opens wider beneath his and you feel his tongue trace your bottom lip before flicking into your mouth. Menthol and chocolate fill your senses and you scramble for more, hands gripping his face as you desperately try to get your fill of him; of Touya. The steel of the staples bites into your palm but you don’t care, don’t care what form you have him in, you have your Touya back.
You’re being lifted off the floor, hoisted to sit on his lap, feeling the entirety of his body against yours.
You pull away to stare at him, not believing this is happening and that at any moment you are going to wake up or snap out of your delusion.
“Are you okay? Did I hurt you?” Touya asks, eyes frantically searching for the reason you aren’t kissing him anymore.
Your chest constricts at his concern. The same sweet and caring boy you fell in love with all those years ago.
“I’m okay, I just-“You stroke his cheeks and he leans into your touch, inhaling a shaky breath. “I missed you so much. There was so much we didn’t get to do.”
He frowns and nuzzles further into your palm. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. I don’t want you to apologise, I just want..” You can’t form the words. Can’t articulate the need within you for him. All these years you’ve held a torch for your deceased best friend. All these years you could have had him with you and now that you do, you aren’t letting go. “I just want you.”
Touya’s frown deepens. “Even now?”  His thumbs stroke circles along your clothed skin.
You know he is referring to his crimes. All the bad he has done and probably will do. You do not care. You had long ago abandoned your hope in the heroes of society, having been granted a look into the past of the now top hero. There is nothing for you in that world, nothing on offer that could sway your feelings for the man below you.
“Even now, and tomorrow and the day after that and yesterday and the day before and the month before that” You smile, knowing you weren’t making sense but none of this made sense. “I never forgot about you.”
Touya’s eyebrows knit together in an expression you don’t know and for a moment you panic; worried you had crossed a line that you didn’t know existed. You want to apologise, take back the words that had so carelessly tumbled out but his grip on your body stops you.
“I never stopped thinking about you,” he sighs, hands sliding up to press into the small of your back.
“Really?” you beam, unable to stifle the excitement that grows in you at his confession.
You are no longer an adult woman sitting in a dirty and dusty warehouse; you are fifteen and hearing your crush confess words you had been so desperately wishing to be spoken.
Your best friend’s fingers trailing over your spine pull you back to the present.
“Never for a single second,” he tests the waters and slips one hand under the hem of your shirt. “I never wanted to forget you.”
When no protest on your behalf comes, Touya slips his other hand beneath the material and begins to trace shapes into your skin.
“What did you think about?” your question is breathless, head beginning to swim as you feel heat bloom in your stomach.
Touya hums in thought, fingers beginning to climb your ribs. “Good things. Great things actually.” hands splay over the band of your bra. “some bad things but that isn’t important.”
Your thighs slip further apart at the implication; weight now fully resting atop his hips. There is no doubt that he can feel the heat from between your legs, the warmth that had begun to pool in the seam of your panties.
“Bad things?” you ask the question without knowing what kind of answer you would get. “I was nothing but nice to you, what bad things could you be thinking of?”
You feel his cock twitch at your innocence. Perfect.
Your answer comes in the form of an action. Touya leans forward and captures your mouth in a searing kiss. All teeth and tongue as his fingers pressed hard into your spine, holding you against his body as if you are a buoy and he is lost at sea. Your own hands begin to wander, sliding from where they came to rest on his neck, into the hair at the nape of his neck and as he digs his teeth into your bottom, you pull at the strands between your digits.
Touya pulls away, breathless.
“I always kept an eye on you, you know.” he pants, pushing your body away only enough to ogle you freely. “And I’ve gotta say you grew up so well.”
There are two thoughts that cross your mind in that spilt second. One: to bring up the fact he has kept you within his sighs for years, has been in the shadows of you life and how there is a part of you, not that big but enough to plant a seed of betrayal, that you can’t forgive him for that. Two: to throw caution to the wind and give into the part of you that aches for him.
The latter wins out.
“I did always think that Dabi was really handsome” you admit, an air of nonchalance in your words.
“Oh yeah? Even with all the new mods?”
“New mods?” you laugh. “Why do you make it sound like you’ve upgraded a game or something?”
Touya laughs with you.
“I’m serious,” vulnerability swims in his eyes as he looks up at you waiting for praise. “Do you really think that I’m still handsome?”
You nod and duck your head closer to his. “I still think you’re so handsome and you will always be handsome, which is really unfair.”
His lips are pressed against yours in a soft kiss. It's gentle and sweet, with no hint of the darkness lurking just below.
“Even after all these years how do you manage to make me so weak?” Touya pulls away to admire you.”You, my pretty girl, are my weakness.”
He tucks your hair behind your ears, holding your cheeks in his cupped hands and pulls you back in for a kiss and you melt into his touch at the possessive compliment.
“All these years, I never thought I’d get to talk to you again let alone touch you.” His mouth moves to your neck, pressing sloppy open-mouthed kisses against your skin. “but, fuck, have I thought about it.”
Your skin flushes at his confession.
His teeth sink into your neck, hard enough to leave a mark but not enough to break the skin.
“Thought about kissing you like this” his words are slurred.
Slick begins to pool in your panties, the seam of your jeans dampening.
“Thought about having you in my lap, just the way you are and how good you’d feel on my cock.”
Your head swims at his words.
“When I saw you again for the first time a few years ago, it took everything in me to not walk up to you and kiss you right there and then.” He bites lower, nipping at your collarbone.
Rough hands make their way under your shirt, exploring the expanse of your back.
“Thought about holding you and kissing you and taking you home.” he bites again. “God, the amount of time I’ve spent imagining you under me or spread out just for me.” Breathing becomes hard. “All for me, just for me.” He chants your name as if it were a prayer.
You grind your hips over his, feeling his cock hard and aching beneath you. Touya groans against your throat, fingers digging into your skin. Hands begin to wander downwards until they find purchase on the buttons of his pants, stopping at the metal for approval from the man beneath you and when it comes in a rushed yes, please you flick open the clasp. Your movements are awkward and nervous, having never thought this would happen and you can tell Touya is just as jittery. His fingers dip under the waistband of your pants, toying with the soft elastic of the band. Your hands follow his and pull at the material, trying to pull it down but stop at the realisation there is no way you could do this and still look seductive.
“I’m trying really hard to make this hot, but I don’t think it’s gonna work.” You admit, giggling at the absurdity.
Touya shakes his head, removing his hands from your hips to hold your face again. “I don’t want to fuck you here.” He presses a kiss to your nose.
Before you can ask, he is answering.
“I’m not gonna have the first time I fuck you be on a dirty floor in a random building.” A kiss on your right cheek.
“But what if I want that?” you retort, hand reaching down between the two of you.
His breath catches as your fingers brush against his clothed cock.
“I know you want that,” he pulls your hand away and entwines your fingers. “and you know I do too,” A kiss to your left cheek. “But I had a plan back when we were younger,” he brings your hand to his lips. “and I’ve already had so much taken from us that I’m not letting our first time be taken too.”
Your heart squeezes. He really is the same boy you fell in love with.
“So as much as we both want it, please let me do this, okay?”
You pout, a habit you had formed long ago that usually got you what you wanted from him.
“Please, baby.” The pet name is a gut punch.
 You nod and hold up your pinkie.
“You promise?”
Touya grins wider than you had ever seen and entwines his finger with yours.
“I promise.”
May 17th 2477 Touya: aged twenty-six You: aged twenty-five
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ᰔ a/n: NOT PROOFREAD! ohmygosh, this was a long haul. I wrote it and then rewrote it and then rewrote it and so on and so forth till I got here. tiny TINY smut cause i didn’t wanna write a whole ass thing so I might do a one shot of it later. this exhausted me holy- also shout out to billie eilish lmao her entire new album helped me write this mainly chihiro, the greatest and blue but also harry styles' as it was and madds buckley's brother
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silencesscreams · 1 year ago
Note
"is there any chance i can fix this?" where james and reader are best friends since birth but he begins to pull away and spend less time with her in favor of the boys, so she just cuts him out of her life and after a while he doesn't know how to deal with it anymore. hiiiii
sad beautiful tragic
james potter x fem reader (angst)
a/n: sorry about any grammar mistakes, english isn’t my first language (also i’m pretty bad at writing angst but i tried my best) also immediately thought of the title because of the taylor swift song, so hope you don’t mind the association. also the first kiss part came to my mind because of a tiktok i saw a few weeks ago but i don’t really remember who’s it was to credit them
warnings: friendship distancing, kissing, fighting, cursing, a bit short (sorry), happy ending
“i’m sorry, okay? i’m so sorry, honey, please. is there any chance i can fix this? just tell me, please”
you knew james potter and he knew you. knowing meaning comprehending each other, meaning that you stood by each others side for as long as you can remember.
he was your first friend. he was your neighbor and you both grew up together, it was expected that you both would know each other better than anyone.
sure, it felt different when you both started hogwarts and suddenly he had new friends, but so did you. you spent the time you could together, always saving a bit of your days for each other.
during the sixth to seventh year summer vacation, he had spent the whole summer with you, you both would hang out all the time.
until he kissed you.
it was the last day of summer and you both had spent the evening in his room. you were talking about a book you had been reading recently and he listened quietly, like it was the most interesting thing he had ever heard of. until you paused for a brief moment and he moved closer to you. you were sat on the floor with him, the carpet tickling your legs as you played with the fluffy yarn under you.
“honey” he said, you looked at him, doe eyed waiting for him to continue. “a phrase. two words, six letters, two vowels. guess.” he said lowly whilst looking at your lips. your mind went blank.
one vowel for each word. you still didn’t get it.
“what are the vowels?” you whisper back, he smiles.
“i and e” he answers, not taking his eyes from off of you for a second. you knew.
“kiss me?” and so he did. his lips met yours abruptly, his hands grabbed your hips and yours went straight to the back of his neck. it completely changed the way you ever saw him, hell, it completely changed your expectations to a kiss. it was better than anything you’d ever experienced and you loved it.
when you got back to school, it seemed like he didn’t do that, actually, it seemed like he didn’t even talk to you the whole summer.
sure, he did casually say hello in the halls and you might’ve shared one or two conversations, but what the hell? he kisses you like that and expects you to just forget about it? that was the most fucked up thing anyone could’ve done. as the semester went on, your mind was absolutely torturing you over that kiss.
it made you overthink every single thing you ever did around him. but maybe he didn't have time, maybe he was really busy with his studies and quidditch, right? that was probably it.
he saw you every once in a while, said an awkward hi or whatever that thing signaling head thing he did was.
the crush you had developed for him didn’t help at all. it made you crave his presence in your life, even now that you hated him more than you ever thought you possibly could. you missed his pet names for you, ‘honey’ and ‘sweetheart’ sounded so amazing coming out of his mouth.
but from the moment he started to ignore you, you decided he was absolutely done. he was never going to see a smile coming from you ever again, he was never going to get another hello, nothing. james potter didn’t deserve a single thing from you.
your friends agreed. they thought he was a piece of shit and said you should’ve cut him off a long time before.
life went on without him, you barely thought about him. your studies were going well, everything was great.
christmas break came up and when you saw james at the train station, you were pissed. you knew he was going to be there for christmas dinner, he was always invited alongside with his family. you didn’t know how he was going to act then, was he going to pretend it never happened?
when you got home, your mother instantly started asking you what you wanted for dinner and you were glad to be home, you just hated that he was in the house next to yours.
a few nights after you both got home, you were invited for a date by steven, who worked at a bookstore near the city park. you said yes, he took you to see a shitty movie and tried to kiss you after dropping you off at your front porch. you dodged it and gave him a good night kiss on the cheek. james saw it all.
once the date left, you heard him yelling from his porch:
“who’s that?” you ignored him and went inside, sure, you weren’t going to see steven again but james didn’t deserve to know that.
on christmas day you went to the potter’s for dinner, your parents insisted for you to go, even though you tried to fake being sick. sirius was there too, you politely greeted all of them and didn’t bother to answer james’ “hey”.
when you sat at the side of the living room table james sat next to you, even though that wasn’t his usual seat. you played with your dress awkwardly and ate less, being there was making you so irritated you lost your appetite.
after taking a bite from your dessert, you thanked euphemia for the food and told your parents you were feeling a bit sick and that you were heading home, telling them to enjoy the rest of their night.
as you were opening the door to head out, you heard footsteps behind you. you knew james was there and you had no interest to talk with him.
“don’t” you simply stated, stepping out and shutting the door lightly on him, he followed you during the small walk between both your houses.
“hey!” he shouted, trying to get your attention. you were about to shut the door to your house on his face, but he held it with his foot, going into your house.
he pulled you by your wrist but you tugged it away from him.
“don’t touch me!” you shouted at him, staring into his eyes for the first time that night.
“now you can talk to me, huh? ‘the fucks up with you?!” he shouts back, brows furrowed. you couldn’t believe him, what a fucking nerve he had.
“whats up with YOU?!” you step closer to him, throwing your keys on the coffee table in the middle of the living room. “you’ve ignored me for the whole semester and now you wanna talk?” he had never seen you like this. you had never been this angry at anyone or anything around him.
“i’m sorry?” he had no reaction, he knew he was wrong, he just couldn’t deal with it. with anything. he didn’t know what to do after he kissed you, he couldn’t handle any of it. he knew that if he spent more time around you he would fall harder, he couldn’t risk it.
“i’m sorry! now that you don’t have anyone else near for you to talk to, i’m worthy of your attention? i’m so lucky, right?!” your eyes started to tear up, but you held it in, he was not getting to see you cry.
“honey, i’m sorry i didn’t talk much with you these past few months, but i tried to speak with you tonight and you didn’t even bother to answer me!” he ran his hand through his hair, looking at you as you sat down on the couch, staring at your hands.
“you didnt even look at me. the entire fucking night. one lousy ‘hey’ is not trying to do anything” he handed you a piece of paper, it was crumpled up in his jeans’ pocket. you knew he was bad with words, but the paper was written front and back. what was he even trying to do? did he think a letter was enough to fix the damage he had done?
“really? you’re a little too late for this, don’t you think?” you said, looking at him angrily.
“fine, don’t read it then. just keep it, okay?” he knew you were about to cry. it was the worst feeling he had ever felt.
“you don’t get to do this to me, james” you hold back tears once you say it.
“i know, honey, i know” he tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, cupping your face as you try to not melt because of his touch. he kisses you, but this time you pull away.
“no. don’t do this to me” you say, a single tear streaming down your face, he wipes it off but more tears just keep coming
“im sorry, im so sorry for everything i did and-“ you interrupt him.
“could you just try to listen?!” you shout, pulling away from his touch again. “what makes you think that i want this? after all you did, better, all that you didn’t do?! you kiss me and expect me to forget about it? expect me to be okay with you ignoring me all the time just because you kissed me again? i can’t be okay with any of this unless you actually explain to me what happened. i really try to understand you, but all of this doesn’t help!”
“i love you” he says “i have loved you all my life and i didn’t know, after i kissed you it all hit me and i couldn’t trust myself around you anymore, i didn’t want to hurt you so i pulled away, i just didn’t know it would hurt you more like that. i’m sorry, but im here now and i want to show you how much I do love you” he pauses and sits next to you on the couch.
“i’m sorry, okay? i’m so sorry, honey, please. is there any chance i can fix this? just tell me, please” he wipes the tears from off your face again. you knew he meant it, you just didn’t know how to trust him again.
“i don’t know” you whisper, looking into his eyes, you had never seen him look this sad. you wanted to trust him, you really did, but how could you? how could you know he wasn’t going to pull something like that again?
you couldn’t be sure of anything, you could only hope for the best and be careful. so you gave it a shot.
“come here” you say lowly, pulling him in for a hug. he buried his face in the crook of your neck and gave you small kisses.
“i’m so sorry, baby” he whispered.
“i know” you whisper back, he looks at you and gives you quick kisses all over your face. you can’t help but smile.
it was going to take a while for you to trust him again, but you knew you could.
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certaimromance · 4 months ago
Text
𝜗𝜚 You Says.
Post prison Reid x Reporter!reader
Read part one here!
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Summary: After a rough night and some misunderstandings, Spencer needs to do everything he can to make things right with you and get his relationship back on track. The problem is, things aren't so easy for you, and he's willing to do anything you ask, even take care of you when no one else will.
Words: 3,1k.
TW: mentions of crime and trauma. angst+comfort. the reader gets sick (nothing serious, just a normal cold). english isn't my first language (sorry for my mistakes, be kind please).
Note: Ok, I didn't think of doing a second part before, but reading my own work made me so sad😭 the cat deserves happy parents (we are the cat) but I warn you that I do not believe in magic apologies.
As an interesting side note, both parts of this story are named after children's games. In this case, it's for "Simon Says," which I thought was pretty cool because in this part, Spencer literally does whatever the reader wants.
I also want to thank you for the support you gave to the first part and for the 300 followers💝 I could not say it before but it makes me very happy.
♡ Enjoy! ♡
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I. I Love You, I’m Sorry.
Spencer had been losing his mind since the last time he saw you in person, and it was all his fault. From the moment the door to his apartment closed behind you and the oven beeped, he began to feel the broken pieces of his heart that you had once held together unravel and shatter even more. He hated himself for letting his insecurities get in the way of the one good thing he had managed to have over the past few years, and for pushing you away when you didn't want to. You had been his exception among all the bad things that had happened in his life for as long as he could remember, the only one that didn't seem to want to be temporary and left him when he least expected it. And he himself had forced you out of his life, even when you didn't want to, begging him with tear-filled eyes for a little remorse that he didn't give you.
Just a few hours after the incident, he tried to go to work as if nothing had happened to clean up the mess the leak had made and put the killer in jail. He brought Penelope the promised cookies and your computer for her to examine because it felt right at the time. Part of him needed her to find real proof of your betrayal so he could stop feeling bad about making you cry and saying such ugly things to you.
Then he found out that you were telling the truth and that your computer contained nothing but photos of the two of you, all the articles he had ever written or been mentioned in your searches, and a few writings in which you poured out all your love for him in the cheesiest and most poetic way possible. You loved him, you really did, and there was no evidence to the contrary, because even Garcia could later assure him that the information had come anonymously and had been bought for five hundred dollars. But it was too late, because he had given you a conviction without even knowing it.
That's when he started to fixate on making amends for what he'd done. Every time you left work, bouquets of your favorite flowers with notes asking for forgiveness and wishing you a good night began to appear in your car. He also made a point of stopping by to talk to you and repeat how sorry he was. You knew this would happen when he realized his mistake. You had told him before you left, and that's why you refused to see him. It was good that the security guards at your workplace didn't let him in, even with his FBI credentials. The tricky part was your building because the doorman already knew him and let him in normally thanks to the excuses Spencer made up, even though you said a thousand times that he shouldn't have.
And that was happening again, for the fifth or sixth time in the last few days.
“Please, just let me talk to you and tell you how sorry I am. Listen to me for a moment.” You could hear Reid's voice from the other side of the door.
You didn't say anything. You just sat with your back against the door and one hand on your heart, as if you were trying to hold it. It didn't even cross your mind that he was in the same situation.
“Just a few minutes, please."
Once more, you remained silent.
Silence was the worst answer someone could give. You knew it, and it hurt to have to do it with him. But you had no choice because you knew that by looking into his eyes for just a few seconds, all the bad things would dissipate and maybe you would even forgive him without thinking just because of the love you had for him. You didn't like being this vulnerable and having so many feelings for someone who didn't trust you.
Lately, you've been spending every waking moment wondering what you could have done to make him believe that you were really capable of betraying him in such a cruel and selfish way. You were the one who woke up in the middle of the night to try to comfort him every time he had a nightmare or couldn't sleep. You drove to his apartment no matter what time it was to make sure he was okay. You lost your breath repeating that he was safe with you. You drank many cups of coffee the next day so you wouldn't fall asleep on the job every time the situation repeated itself. That's why you started sleeping in his apartment, wrapped in his arms because he said it made him happy to wake up and see you. And even with all that, Spencer was able to believe that you didn't love him.
You were running your hands through your hair and sighing, trying to block out all the thoughts running through your head, when you heard his phone ring. You could tell it was important by the way he spoke and changed his tone of voice, so you got up from the floor at the same time he did to put your ear to the door.
“I really have to go now, but could you open up a little bit so I can take a quick look at you?” He asked in a pleading tone after hanging up the call. “Please, I know you can hear me. I can see the shadow of your feet under the door.”
You really thought he didn't know you were there, feeling like a fool for listening to every word he said.
“If you want to see me, turn on the TV.” Your voice finally reached Spencer, and it gave him a glimmer of hope. It was the first time you had spoken to him since that night, and even though there was a door between the two of you, you were talking to him.
“It's not enough.”
“And it's not my problem.”
That was more hurtful than your silence.
“I know, it's mine.” He replied after a couple of seconds, trying to process everything. “And I will do everything I can to fix it...I have to go now, but take care of yourself. The nights have been getting colder lately, so wrap up warm.”
You knew it was a bit silly to think of that now, but his attention to detail was impressive. Since you did the evening news, you used to get off work very late, and the change from air conditioning to the city cold was quite a lot. Spencer had cited scientific studies to you many times to make you aware and know what kind of clothing materials to use to avoid a cold. You missed that a lot.
If he had the same attitude as the night of the conflict, it would be easier. You could hate him and stop loving him so strongly.
“I love you, William misses you and so do I.”
You frowned because you didn't know anyone by that name.
“William?”
“Our cat.” He answered simply. “When we talked about how we would name him, you said that a lot of people name their pets after their favorite characters. You love the movie ‘Notting Hill’ and whenever we watch it, you always say you like Hugh Grant's character named William. It also means strong-willed warrior. I just thought you would like it.”
You didn't say anything at the time because you had to cover your hand with your mouth to keep from doing so, but you liked it and you liked it too much. Once again, he focused on the details.
“You can change it if you want because I don't know if he likes it, but what I do know is that he misses you. He lies on your blanket and starts meowing, and he also looks at the door. I certainly think that every time I come home he expects it to be you.” He kept talking as he received no response from you. “It sounds like I'm talking about myself. And it's true because it happens to me the same way.”
When he paused, a tear escaped and fell down your cheek. It wasn't fair for him to say those things now.
“If you want to see him and me not being there, you can send me a message...but I'd really like to be.” He paused again, as if searching for the perfect words.
What did it cost him to have searched for the perfect words the night he distrusted you?
“I must go, I love you.”
The last thing you heard before he left was Spencer's footsteps heading towards the elevator.
II. I Miss You, I’m Sorry.
Just two weeks later, you realized that maybe you should have listened to Spencer when he said the nights were getting too cold. If you had, now you probably wouldn't be lying on your bed with an unbearable flu and no one there to bring you soup or a cold washcloth for your forehead because your mother was taking too long to get to city.
When you were younger, you thought it was a great idea to get as far away from your hometown as possible. Now, however, you realize that you need a familiar face to take care of you because you can't do it alone all the time.
You felt a sense of relief when you heard the door to your apartment open.
“Mom? I'm really hungry and the soup is all gone.” You spoke in a tired tone as you heard footsteps approaching. But at that moment, you watched as the cat you shared with Reid jumped onto the bed and started purring at you.
You thought you were hallucinating from the fever until you saw Spencer walking into your room with a couple of bags.
“I know you were expecting your mother, but we brought you soup and medicine.” He said, sitting up in bed to look closely at you and put a hand on your forehead. “You're burning up.”
“What are you doing here?” You asked, trying to pull away from his touch.
“Your mother called me because she couldn't find a flight today and was very worried. She asked me to take care of you.”
Of course she did, because she adored him and didn't know that things were bad between you two.
“I don't need you to take care of me.” You barely settled into bed and petted the cat. “Go to work, make sure no one leaks information.”
Oh, that was a low blow for him.
“I asked for a few days off because you have a high fever and someone needs to take care of you.”
“You don't have to...”
“I want to.” He said, interrupting you and putting a cold cloth on your forehead.
“Just because you're looking out for me doesn't mean I'm going to forget everything and forgive you.” You clarified right away, trying not to lose focus because of the relief you felt thanks to the cold compress.
“I know, and I don't expect you to. Just let me take care of you now, forget you hate me until you get better. I won't take advantage of this, I swear.” He looked at you with a serious gaze, as if he were swearing an oath. “Please.”
God, not puppy dog eyes now.
You used to love it when he looked at you with those sparkling eyes. Now, though, you felt manipulated by it.
“Fine, give me the soup.” You finally agreed, knowing you didn't have much of a choice. “Just a warning, please don't answer any calls near me. I can listen in and use the information to hire a nurse.”
He ignored the comment and didn't bring it up to make you uncomfortable. He sat on the edge of the bed, brushing a strand of hair away from your face. His touch was light, and his eyes searched yours as he spoke.
“Is there anything else besides soup I can bring you? More tissues, or maybe some medicine?” He asked in a soft, soothing voice.
You shook your head, still a bit dazed by the situation and your stomach rumbling. You watched as Spencer disappeared into the kitchen, and you could hear his footsteps echoing throughout the house, followed by the clatter of pots and pans and the sound of the stove being turned on. You could only lie back on your bed, feeling a wave of tiredness wash over you.
A few minutes later, he came back with a bowl of chicken noodle soup and sat down next to you on the bed, being careful not to spill anything.
“Are you planning to feed me soup?” You asked, with a hint of irony in your voice, as you watched me hold the spoon and watch you.
“If you wish, I'll be happy to.” He replied simply and brought the spoon gently to your mouth.
“I'm not a baby.”
Especially not his baby.
“You hate me, I know. But I really want to take care of you, and I won't leave until at least your mother arrives.” He paused for a second, as if to catch his breath. “If you don't want me around, that's okay, I'll just sit in the corner of the room or in the living room in silence. It hurts, but I'll take whatever you want.”
You remained silent for several seconds, dedicating yourself to stroking the cat to avoid Spencer's gaze.
“I don't hate you.” Was the only thing you could say at the time.
Something inside you was expecting a more exaggerated reaction for letting your guard down a bit, or maybe you were just too feverish. The thing was, he had only given you a small, almost non-existent smile.
“I know.” He finally spoke and gently adjusted the cold compress on your forehead. “And that's why I hate myself.”
At that moment, while you were trying to make sense of how things had changed so much in just a week, he was watching you.
Spencer was waiting for you to explode, to tell him how sorry you were for getting involved with him and his complicated world, that it was all one big mistake that you would regret forever. He was expecting disaster, pain, tears, and a lot of chaos.
But you didn't give him any of that.
Just a sweet nothing.
He could tell at that moment that even though you were in a feverish state and had many reasons to be cruel, you would not be. He realized that you would never yell at him or do anything to hurt him, that the most painful thing you could give him was your silence. And it was then that he confirmed that you loved him the way he thought he did not deserve to be loved: honestly and genuinely.
“Why?” You whispered after a few minutes of silence. “Why are you with me if you don't trust me?”
“I trust you.” He looked you straight in the eye as he spoke, trying to show that he was being completely sincere. “I just don't trust myself.”
You frowned and let out a groan from the discomfort in your forehead. You weren't sure if you were hallucinating because of the cold or if Spencer was really shivering.
“I don't think I'm good enough for you, or deserve you, or that you love me because you want to.” He finally admitted, his voice slightly shaky. He seemed to be in a worse state than you. “It's silly because you've never given me a reason to distrust you.”
“I know you thought I was going to leave. But I didn't want to leave until you asked me to.” You were close to crying, so you pretended to sneeze to hide your watery eyes. You didn't want to show how vulnerable you were. “It was easier to distrust me and blame me like I was just another bad person you catch.”
“Yes, but...” He replied, trying to answer your question.
“Don't talk. It's my turn.”
He nodded after a few seconds, watching you with concern. “Just be careful, you're still sick.”
You already knew how sick you were and how deplorable you probably looked, but you wanted to say it all and stop feeling a lump in your throat.
“You say you trust me, but you really don't, and I've been trying to understand you for almost a year, Spencer. It's been eleven months of trying not to invade your space, avoiding topics that make you tense or your eyes glaze over.” You had to stop to catch your breath and drink some water with his help. “And you think I don't understand you or really know you, but I do. I know how all your dishes are arranged, I know how you like to fold clothes and eat toast, I know that chess reminds you of someone because your eyes get watery every time we see a board, I know about the book signed by Maeve that you hide in your closet and about which you tense up every time I'm near, I know about your nightmares about prison that you don't like to talk about, and about your mother's favorite colors that change every day. I know so much about you, and yet you think I know nothing.”
Once more, there was a long, quiet pause.
“I'm so sorry.” He held your hands as he repeated the same thing, this time with a truly sincere tone. The whole room was still tense as his knees touched the floor, and the apology he gave you seemed like a plea. “I'm really sorry. I know you don't want apologies, you want trust, and I'm going to show you that.”
You didn't say anything as he sat down next to you on the bed.
“I trust you, that's why I always tell you about my cases. And I will tell you about all my past, if you want, because for me you are my present and my future...of course, only if you still want to.”
The eyes of both of you were fixed on the cat you shared, who was purring and lying very comfortably in the middle of the bed. It was nice to know that at least one of the three of you was happy.
“Tell me.”
And just as you asked, he told you everything because he wanted to show you that he trusted you.
This time he really trusted.
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