#“i should prepare stuff ahead of time cause i love dwarves”

[8thparadox]

she's never letting her boys go again

for @khazadweek day 1 'family'

[dingberg]

Hey, I was wondering if the characters you make are for your own campaigns, or campaigns you play in. You inspire me to create my own unique characters and I was wondering if you had any tips on how to incorporate "complex characters" into a campaign. I feel like I'd just get on the DM's/Player's nerves...

First off, thanks for being the first person to ever send me an ask on here, lol. And you have no idea how happy I am to hear that I inspire you in any way, let alone to make your own characters and go above and beyond the call of duty with them. Apologies in advance for the massive response. I can be an extremely long-winded person when it comes to things I’m passionate about.

Anyway, all the characters I’ve made for D&D have been for player roles…never been a DM myself (but maybe some day). Unfortunately, your fears about getting on the DM’s / other player’s nerves by playing weird, complicated characters aren’t exactly unfounded. The DMs I’ve played with could talk your ear off with stories about the difficulties they’ve had dealing with my shenanigans. But despite all the trouble I cause, the DMs and players I’ve played with still really enjoy playing with me and love my characters (or at least that’s what they tell me). Here’s what I’ve learned from my experiences as far as your concerns of being able to flex your creative muscles and still get along with the other people who have to put up with you. These rules apply to any situation, but they go double for playing weird characters.

Rule #1: COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR FELLOW PLAYERS AND ESPECIALLY WITH YOUR DM.

This is probably the most important rule. It’s essential that you learn what the people you’re playing with are and are not ok with and to make sure you’re all on the same page. Because playing a nonstandard character not only puts added challenge on yourself, but on everyone else that has to play around you as well. So make sure your fellow players and especially the DM know exactly what they’re in for with your character and that they’re completely ok with it before committing to anything. And be willing to make concessions for them as well if they’re not comfortable with anything. Sometimes people will be apprehensive to go along with something they’re not used to, especially if they don’t have much reason to trust you won’t screw it up or do it for the wrong reasons. And there are things you can do to help ease those fears, but don’t push too hard, especially on your first time with a group.

The first proper campaign I was ever in, my DM wanted to limit it to only human characters for the first go around because most of us were inexperienced and he didn’t want to take any chances. But I wasn’t really too interested in the setting and felt I needed something to anchor my interest. I was really interested in homebrewing (still am) and had a slime character (Chu) who I designed for another non-D&D project but unfortunately got left on the cutting room floor, so I wanted to give her a chance to shine in this new setting. I don’t necessarily recommend anyone going this ham on their first campaign, but I’d been writing and designing characters for years before I picked up D&D, so I felt pretty confident that I could pull it off.

I knew homebrewing a completely custom race on my first campaign was definitely going to raise a lot of red flags, so I wanted to make things as easy as possible for the DM and help him feel comfortable that I knew what I was doing before asking him to trust me. I first asked what the setting was and made sure this character would actually fit naturally without compromising what the DM had already set up. Then I thoroughly studied the guidebook for the system and setting we were playing in and wrote up an entire guide going through every aspect of how this character would function both in terms of mechanics and lore (which years later turned into my Slime Guide that I’ve posted here). Then I pitched it to the DM to see if he’d even be ok with the idea, then sat down with him to go over my guidebook together and figure out what needed to be changed or rebalanced. When that was all approved, I talked to the other players and told them what I had in mind and asked if they were all cool with it, which they were. So we went ahead with it and we all had a blast with that campaign (literally…a lot of stuff blew up, my poor slime girl was traumatized).

You don’t necessarily have to go to such extreme lengths yourself, but just communicate with the others, make sure they’re ok with what you want to do before you do it, and be willing to make concessions and work with them to make sure everyone’s happy, because D&D is a collaborative effort and it’s not very fun for anyone if some people aren’t having a good time.

Rule #2: Try to put as much of the strain of dealing with your character on yourself and not on other people as possible.

Coordinate with the DM and the other players to figure out what their general plans are. Make sure you’ve got a character that will logically fit in with the party and the world they’ll be adventuring in, and will at least mostly get along with their fellow party members. Nobody wants to have to play babysitter and hold up the adventure or force their characters or world to behave in a way that’s unnatural or metagame-y to try to come up with some reason for the one character who doesn’t gel with anyone or make sense as a member of the party to not just follow the logical path and split from the party. Don’t be afraid to let your characters fight and have disagreements with other player characters here and there, but your characters should always have something that makes them fit into the party naturally and binds them with their fellow adventurers enough to overcome almost any fight or disagreement. Hell, I’ve had multiple situations where my character had a falling out with the party and almost left. But I always have at least one thread that will bring my character back on their own in case the rest of the party doesn’t naturally bring my character back themselves. Never put the onus on the DM or other players to keep your character in the party unless you’re prepared to lose that character.

Similarly, you don’t wanna play a character that’s just not going to fit in with the setting and will ruin the immersion for everyone. If you want to play a cyborg in a medieval fantasy setting, you need to have a good reason for it that everyone else is completely on board with. If your party is on a grand quest to help the local dwarf community raise money to build an orphanage, it’s probably not a good idea to play a character who despises dwarves and/or children. And if you want to play as a monster character in a setting where the average person is hostile towards monsters, your fellow players had better be playing some pretty chill dudes, and your character had better have some way to pass the time they’ll spend sitting out in the woods while the rest of the party heads into town to get supplies unless you’re real good at disguising your monstrousness or think you can outrun the crowds armed with torches and pitchforks (this actually happened to one of my characters, fun times).

Rule #3: Just follow basic etiquette and have fun.

It’s alright to make mistakes and accidentally step on someone’s toes every now and then. It happens to the best of us. Just establish at the outset that you first and foremost just want to have a good time with everyone and get along. Clearly establish your own boundaries from the start and respect other people’s. Make it clear that you’re willing to listen to complaints and concerns and work with people to resolve them before they get out of control, and absolutely make sure you behave in a way that people will be comfortable with bringing this stuff up to you and talking about it without fear of hurting your feelings or causing a negative reaction.

Basically, as long as you consider the feelings of your fellow players and DMs, do a good job of communicating, and make sure everyone is on the same page as far as boundaries and what they want out of the experience, you’re gonna be solid. Because even if you do screw something up, everyone should understand that it was just an honest mistake and know that you’ll learn from that mistake and fix it for next time.

It’s all about building trust (giving and receiving). Because people who trust that you know what you’re doing and have the best intentions in mind are gonna be a lot more willing to let you try out your crazy ideas and play along with them. I almost exclusively play weird, nonstandard characters and early on, every character I pitched was met with an exasperated “Oh my god, why do you do this to me?” from my main DM. But I consistently followed these rules, proved that I know how to make and play fun characters that have a positive impact on the campaigns they’re in, and built up that trust with my group. And now everyone has a blast playing with me and interacting with my characters. I’ve even inspired some of my friends to flex their creativity and delve into the weirder side of character creation.

Sorry again for the light novel, lol. I hope this helped you and anyone else that took the time to read all this. And I’m always open to answer questions!