#[ this became so unbearably long i'm So Sorry take this as the end of my writing career ]

[elllisaaa]

no nut november - kim seungmin (7th to lose)

-> pairing : seungmin x fem!reader

-> words count : 3.2k

-> genre : smut, etablished relation

-> warnings : switch!seungmin, begging, dirty talk, praising, hair pulling, unprotected sex, blowjob, handjob, use of 'good boy' and 'slut', bondage, overstimulation + the way i'm depicting seungmin does not represent him, it's only a work of fiction

-> 18+ content bellow, minors dni

-> reblogs and feedbacks are appreciated ! sorry for any mistakes, english is not my first language.

-> masterlist | skz masterlist | no nut november

Seungmin was not someone to give up easily, and you knew that when you got together. However, it was one of the things you liked the most about him. Well, of course sometimes he was so stubborn that you wanted to rub the evidence of him being wrong in his face, but most of the time, you were happy that your boyfriend was able to do just what he said. 

But this time, Seungmin might have fucked up. Okay, he wanted to prove to the guys that he was the best. Okay, he was competitive and wanted to win. But was it really worth it when he couldn’t even touch you ? He had made it clear to you that his goal was to win the no nut november bet he made with the rest of the members. You complained a bit at first, but it was also challenging for you, so you agreed. 

You did nothing, really nothing to try and make him lose. You had been reasonable, forcing you to keep your hands for yourself even if you wanted to let them wander around his body when he was pecking your lips as he came home. But for it to be equal, you forbade him to touch you for the month too. Would be too tempting, as you said yourself. And he agreed at first. He wanted to win, and he was ready to do everything for that. 

Time went by, and if the first two weeks were pretty easy to handle, within the end of the third, Seungmin became unbearable. He even ended up sleeping on the couch to avoid waking up with a boner because you couldn’t stay still in your sleep - and because all he wanted was to fuck with you in the early hours of the morning everytime he breathed in your smell. 

It’s been almost a month, only two days left in November. However, Seungmin was on the edge of giving up. It was not even something you did, on the contrary, you have been so respectful and pliant to all of his wishes. It was just him and his corrupted mind that could only think of you, all day long. It was becoming insufferable and exhausting resisting his desire for you. 

He wanted to wait for you tonight, knowing you would come back home very late due to work. But he was so tired that he fell asleep before he even finished one episode of the series he put on the television. It’s only when he heard the door closing that he woke up slightly, lifting himself off the couch while rubbing his eyes to make the sleepiness go away. He heard you hanging in your coat and getting your shoes off before heading to the living room.

“- What are you doing awake baby ?

- Mh… Was waiting for you, wanted to sleep next to you.”

You dropped your purse on the table between the couch and the television, before reaching for your boyfriend’s cheeks, rubbing your thumbs on them as he pulled you in closer, circling your waist with his arms. He nuzzled his face against your stomach, sighing in relief when you stroked his hair gently. 

“- Rough day ? 

- Exhausting…”

You leaned forward, kissing the top of his head multiple times before you tried to escape. But Seungmin didn’t seem to want to let you go, gripping on your waist to keep you close from him and making you giggle. 

“- I’m just going to take a quick shower baby, then you’ll get all the cuddles you want.

- Can I come with you ?”

He looked up to you, his eyes now glistening with something a lot more thrilling than sleep. You knew what he was thinking about. But you were only a few days apart from winning the bet, you were almost there. 

“- I want to, but I don’t think it’s a good idea.

- Why ?

- Please Seungmin, you know really well what I’m talking about. You made me promise to keep my mind clear when you couldn’t. It’s what I’m trying to do just now.”

He pouted for some seconds, before standing up and finally wrapping you in his embrace, preventing you from running away to hide in the bathroom. 

“- But I want you. Don’t you want me too ?”

You raised your head until your eyes met, biting down on your lips as soon as you saw him licking his own. You wanted him too, but all these efforts to keep your hands to yourself for a whole month would be thrown away too easily if you let him win just like that. You smirked to yourself when you put your hands around his neck, tilting your head to the side. 

“- Hm… I don’t know, maybe you should give me something to test the water, I can’t remember what it feels like.”

Seungmin mumbled some words sounding like “gonna make you remember forever” before he leaned down and kissed you passionately. And you responded with just as much desire as him. You were actually craving this for weeks, you would have been dumb to keep your little game on. Your fingers ran through his hair, pulling on it lightly and making him grunt. You took advantage of his opened mouth to play with his tongue, moaning at the contact you had missed too much. 

“- Fuck… I missed this…”

He groaned when you talked and stopped kissing him. He missed this too. Very much. And now that he had got a taste again, he didn't let you go. So he started to push you towards the bathroom while capturing your lips again, knowing that you needed your shower after work. Seungmin lifted you to sit you up on the counter, not caring about your clothes getting wet from the water that was still on it. He let go of you only to open the water in the shower for it to warm up. 

You didn’t waste more time and started stripping off your clothes, throwing them away as Seungmin watched your skin being exposed to his lustful gaze little by little, getting out of his sweatpants and underwear as quickly as possible. He wanted to be inside you. He needed to be inside you. Your panty had hardly hit the floor when Seungmin made his way to you again, spreading your legs wide and standing between them. He could have moaned at the sight of your pussy dripping, just waiting for him to finally take what was his. 

“- Fuck ! You’re so wet love… I missed your pretty pussy so much…”

His fingers headed directly to your clit, circling it like he knew you liked it. A whine fell from your lips, having missed his touch just as much as he missed touching you. 

“- Min… Min wait !”

His eyes detached from your glistening slit, his thumb pressing lightly against your entrance and making you moan. He already seemed lost, already seemed too far to care about anything else than you. 

“- I want you so bad but the bet ? Thought you really wanted to-”

The end of your sentence was muffled by his lips crashing on yours, and another moan escaped from you as he pushed a finger past your folds. You gripped his shoulders tightly, wanting to feel his skin against yours over and over. A month was definitely too much, and you will never make this mistake again. Your reflections were cut off by Seungmin’s lips sliding from your mouth to your jaw, and then your neck. You tilted your head to the side, humming in satisfaction as he sucked on your sensitive skin. 

“- I don’t give a fuck about the bet, I just need you.”

It was rare for Seungmin to express his desire so clearly to you. Even though you’ve been together for two years, he was still a little embarrassed to let you know what was going through his mind in this kind of moment. And every time he did, you wouldn't miss the opportunity of teasing him gently, but endlessly. It was certainly your favourite thing about him. He wanted to have the upper hand all the time, but you knew how to make him surrender. You loved it when he did. 

“- I want you so bad y/n…

- Beg for it then.”

His head snapped up from your neck on which some marks had already started to appear. His big puppy eyes almost made you give up, but you liked to see him cry for you even more. 

“- Seriously ? 

- Did you think you could not touch me for a whole month because of a stupid bet, just to give up one day before the end and not get punished ? Then you don't know me so well baby."

Seungmin remained speechless as you pushed him away just enough to get off of the counter. You were still wearing your underwear, and you did nothing to try to get them off before stepping inside the shower, relaxing under the hot water. And Seungmin stayed there, only capable of admiring every curve of your body as droplets ran down your skin. 

“- You’re really going to play it like that ?

- Yes. Should’ve thought about it before making this stupid bet. Now come here.”

He huffed and tried to seem angry but his hard dick was a clear reminder that he was not immune to the affect your behavior had on him. He liked it when you listened to him straight away. But he also liked it so much when you were ordering him around as if you owned him. And in a way, you owned him. You owned his heart, and you owned his body. 

“- So ? You’re gonna stay there or come here and prove to me you deserve a reward ?”

Seungmin was fast to join you in the shower, his hands and lips all over you, tracing your skin as if you were an artwork, a goddess. He willingly waited for your permission before unclasping your bra, going right for your nipples to suck on them as if he was a man starved. You both moaned at the feeling, having missed each other so much. 

“- You’re so good for me Min… But you need to let me wash myself first. 

- You’re annoying…

- Yeah, but you love me. And you’re going to stroke your cock for me, but you can’t cum. Okay ?”

Seungmin stepped back a little, a pout on his lips. But he didn’t get to go too far before you grabbed his hair, pulling his head back as he tried to contain a moan. 

“- I didn’t hear you babe. Have you understood ? 

- Yes…”

His voice was shaky, but at this point, he didn’t even try to hide it. He just wanted to feel your touch, and he knew that the only way was to listen to you and do what you said to him. He leaned against the wall, his cock in his hand while you were washing your body and hair. You had to admit it : Seungmin was looking incredibly hot, and all you wanted to do was to get down on your knees and choke on his dick. But he needed to suffer a little more, and you needed to hear him beg you to do something. 

And you did something. You sucked his dick, dropping to your knees and taking him in your mouth as soon as you finished your shower. He was so sensitive, he almost came just seeing you sucking him, but if he did, you would have never let him touch you. And he needed it. So he let you do your thing. Let you deepthroat him, stroke him, tie him to the bed, making him moan and whine so much his throat was dry. 

“- Y/n… Stop that…. F-Fuck ! I can’t take it anymore !”

Your grin was eating your face as you didn’t listen to Seunmgin, your hand still wrapped around his cock and not letting go until he begged you. Tears were filling his now glossy eyes, his cheeks were red, sweat covering his whole body. He was asking you to stop, but he was thrusting in your hand in hope of getting more and more. And every time he did that, you would stop moving and let him whine and whimper all he wanted. 

“- I need you baby…”

It was a good start, but not enough. You needed to hear more, you needed to hear more of his moans and whines of your name. 

“- If you need me so much, you know what to say love.”

You smiled again, even if Seungmin had closed his eyes for several minutes. You stopped stroking his cock, and he didn’t even get to whine before you licked it and took him in your mouth again. With his hands tied to the headboard, he could only moan and close his eyes, gripping the handcuffs and trying not to cum as you started to bob your head on his length. 

Seungmin wanted to hold on a little longer, to push you so much that you would give up. But he was so sensitive right now, all he wanted was to be buried deep inside of you, he needed that. His breath hitched in his throat as you licked his tip once again before sucking on his cock. 

“- F-Fuck ! Please, please… Please y/n fuck me… Please ! I can’t take it anymore, I need you please…”

You smiled to yourself as you watched your boyfriend struggle to talk as he was interrupted every now and then by whimpers and whines. He was so beautiful, laying in your bed with tears streaming down his face and neverending pleas escaping his lips. 

“- That’s it baby, finally using the right words.

- Please baby… Please…”

You bite your lips as you straddle his hips, taking his face in your hands and getting him to look at you. You wiped his tears away with your thumbs, smiling at him as you lowered yourself on his cock. You were so wet that the sound of his dick stretching you out resonated in the room as loud as both your moans. 

“- Y/n… I-I’m gonna cum…

- Let go Min, fill me up.”

It only took him a couple of thrust in your cunt to shoot his load, moaning in a high pitched voice as he did, missing the way you looked at his blissful face in adoration. As Seungmin was trying to get back, he felt your fingers running through his hair, and he also felt that you started to ride him, making him shiver because he was still so sensitive. But at the same time, all he wanted was to ruin you like you had ruined him. 

“- Feeling better baby ?”

Your cocky smile was whipped off your face as soon as Seungmin thrusted his hips up, meeting yours and making you moan. 

“- Would feel better if I was free.

- You’ve been a good boy, so I guess I can untie you, hm ?”

Seungmin's eyes followed every one of your moves as you got up - holding back a sigh when he lost the feeling of your hot pussy around him - to get the keys and open the handcuffs. As soon as his wrists were free, he threw you on the mattress, making you gasp. A gasp that was quickly replaced by his name as he filled you up to the brim again.

“- That’s it pretty, scream my name again.”

You couldn’t have formed a coherent sentence even if you wanted to. Your nails were digging in the skin of his back as Seungmin was pounding into you roughly, losing himself in the feeling of your tight walls clenching around him. It was too much for his sensitive cock, but at the same time all he wanted was more. More of your moans, more of your pussy, more of your skin, more of you. 

“- Aah ! Min ! Min, I need more please !”

A low grunt escaped his mouth as he stood up on his knees, pushing your legs flush against your chest and giving him an heavenly sight of your glistening pussy, full of his cock and cum. Seungmin picked up his pace, making you grasp the sheets beside your head to try and ground yourself in reality. 

 “- You need more ? Then beg for it.

- Please, please, please Min…”

Seungmin hummed when he squeezed your thighs, guiding you to wrap them around his waist, the new position making you moan louder. He loved when you were taking control of him like you did, but the best part was when he got you begging for his cock. 

“- Come on baby, I know you can do way better than that.

- I want you to fill me up with your cum, need you to fuck me so hard I can’t walk tomorrow… Please Seungmin, please baby… I want you to make me cum on that big cock… Please…

- That’s a lot better…”

With that being said, he sped up the rhythm of his thrusts, making you see stars each time he was hitting that sensitive spot inside of you. Seungmin knew your body like the back of his hand by now, knowing exactly what he needed to do to make you feel good, what he needed to do to make you cum. But he didn’t, simply keeping his pace and fucking your roughly, and it was not enough. He knew what could bring you to the edge, he was just teasing you, making you whimper. 

“- Now what’s that baby ? Is it not enough for you ?

- Yes ! Yes, I need more please…

- So desperate for my cock, that’s cute.”

You wanted to kiss away his smirk, make him remember how he was crying under your touch just a few minutes ago, make him remember how pathetic he looked, begging for you to let him cum - oh, how the tables have turned. But soon enough, his fingers finally found your clit, circling around it and applying just the right amount of pressure to make you cry out his name. Tears spilled out of your closed eyes as your orgasm washed over you, clenching so hard on Seungmin’s dick that he couldn’t move anymore, cumming deep inside of your cunt from the lustful vision of your ruined body. Some high-pitched moans escaped his mouth as he nuzzled his face in the crook of your neck, savouring his much needed relief. 

“- I’m never doing this again.”

You chuckled lightly at his remark, trying to sit up and go wash yourself even if you were spent and just wanted to sleep at the moment. But Seunmgin didn’t move the slightest bit, on the contrary, he wrapped his arms around your waist, still buried inside of you. 

“- Can we stay like this a little longer ? I missed you y/n…”

You smiled to yourself as you let one of your hands plunge in his messy hair, the fingers of the other one tracing random patterns on his back. Seungmin rarely expressed his feelings so clearly to you, and that didn’t bother you at all - you understood very well that it was something he was not so comfortable with. But when he did share his thoughts with you, it made you melt on the spot. 

“- I missed you too Min.” 

Maybe it wasn’t the traditional way, but it was his way of saying he loved you, and you were more than happy to reciprocate his confession. 

-> i don't allow any copies, reposts or translations of my works.

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[urvape1kz]

CRAVING HIS TOUCH Gojo Satoru

Pairing Gojo Satoru x Reader!

Summary: After divorcing Gojo Satoru following years together and raising two children, you find yourself facing lonely nights. Encouraged to start dating again, you meet the seemingly perfect Kento Nanami. However, every moment with him only intensifies your longing for Satoru, who coincidentally also misses you.

Warnings: Authors first smut, MNDI, cheating, possessive behavior, toxic relationship/behaviors, vaginal fingering, vaginal sex, choking, breeding kink

Dating, a degrading practice in the shoes of an underpaid not to mention divorced mother of two. A year ago you found yourself divorcing the man of your dreams, rich play boy Satoru Gojo. Satoru knew your heart inside out as if it were a map to paradise. He showered you with gifts from Dior and dates straight out of fairy tales on the top of the eiffel tower. Leaving him wasn’t fun; let alone easy. But his family's constant backhanded and abusive comments, along with their comparisons to his ex-girlfriends, made life with him unbearable. Despite your pleas for him to cut them off, he dismissed you with a casual "you know how my parents are” and never touched the subject again. 

At some point it all just became too much and you inevitably left. Since then, your friends have been relentless, practically pleading with you to to look into dating apps or let them play matchmaker. So, after slogging through eight apps and enduring at least a million disappointing encounters, just when you were about to lose hope, you stumbled upon Kento Nanami.

He wasn't as handsome as Satoru, that was for sure, but he was no ordinary catch. Kento was a world-renowned chef with undeniable charm, easily winning you over. he other day, he asked you out to the movies, and you couldn't resist saying yes. 

You spent hours preparing for your date, every detail was meticulously planned from your dress to your makeup. Everything was going perfectly, just as you had imagined, until you felt a slight buzz from your back pocket—it was your babysitter. 

"I'm really sorry, Ms. (L/N)," came her shaky voice on the other end. "My mom had an accident, and I don't think I can sit for you tonight." She sounded on the verge of tears. 

You let out a heavy sigh, understanding that it wasn't her fault. "It's okay, kid," you reassured her gently. "Take care of your mom. I'll keep her in my prayers."

A heartfelt "thank you" echoed through the phone before she hung up. As panic started to rise, you wracked your brain for options. Then it hit you— Satoru was still available wasn’t he?

Your finger hovered over his contact, once decorated with a bunch of heart emojis. You paced back and forth in your room, questioning whether reaching out to your ex so suddenly was morally okay. 

Who calls their ex out of the blue like this? you wondered. But it's fine.. you reassured yourself. We're co-parents; this is completely normal I mean I would have done the same for him. 

No you wouldn’t.

Despite your horrible attempts to muster courage, you couldn't bring yourself to call him. So, you opted for a text instead. 

"Satoru, I know this is short notice, but could you watch the kids tonight? I have plans."

Almost instantly, he replied—unsurprisingly, for him.

Of course. You don’t even have to ask their papa’s been missing them a whole bunch anyways :)  

His words tugged at your heartstrings, reminding you of the strained relationship you caused between him and his children. Taking a deep breath you shoved those thoughts away into an abyss because tonight was about you. 

--

Going to Satoru's house felt like stepping back in time—a mix of nostalgia and trepidation. Everything looked the same as you left it; the flowers you'd planted were still there, blooming as beautifully as ever not to mention the welcome mat you purchased over four years ago when you two first moved in together. 

Before you could muster the courage to knock on his door, your four-year-old twins Kyoko and Yugo darted ahead, banging eagerly on his huge sturdy wooden door.

"Daddy, we're here! We're here!" they shouted, their voices echoing in the quiet.

Almost instantly, the door swung open, and they melted into his arms like ice cream. Standing up his gaze locked onto you with a deliberate intensity that felt almost robotic. His eyes traced over your short red dress, lingered on your bold red lipstick, and took in your meticulously styled hair. The air between you was thick with unspoken words and memories.

"You look... amazing," he finally said, his voice betraying a hint of awe that clashed with the tension in the room.

Before you could respond, your son Yugo's innocent voice broke the silence. "Mama's got a date, Papa!" he giggled, oblivious to the weight of his words.

A sudden chill swept over you, and you felt the atmosphere grow heavy as the four of you stood there, caught in an awkward tableau. Satoru's face tightened, his eyes reflecting a mix of hurt and resignation. For a moment, it felt like time stood still, the silence stretching uncomfortably between you.

The tension was finally broken by your kids' eager pleas to play video games inside. Satoru hesitated, his hand lingering on the door as if he wanted to say something—anything—but couldn't find the words. Then, with a sigh he slammed the door in front of your face, the door that you two once struggled to open entangled in passionate kisses that you could still feel on the tip of your lips.

Gathering your strength, you made your way to your car, feeling on the brink of tears. Just when it seemed like the weight of the world might crush you, a text from Nanami lit up your phone.

"Just bought the tickets. Missing youu 💋"

Despite the stress you were feeling, a smile tugged at the corners of your mouth. You put the car in gear and headed to meet him at the movies. As you pulled up, you spotted Nanami waiting outside, a beautiful bouquet of white roses cradled in his arms. His face lit up as he saw you, almost tripping over his feet to greet you.

"You make me feel underdressed," he smiled, planting a kiss on your cheek.

"Oh, please. You do that to me every day with your fancy suits and ties," you teased back, taking his hand in yours as you walked inside.

"So, what movie did you pick? You never really told me," you asked, leaning your head on his shoulder as you walked inside.

"'Amants Interdits.' It's a French film. When I heard about it, I just knew you'd love it," he replied, excitedly swinging your hands back and forth.

While his intentions were undoubtedly good, the movie turned out to be a melodramatic mess that tugged at every lingering heartstring in your soul, reminding you uncomfortably of Satoru. As the credits rolled, you felt Nanami's hand gently cup your face, his eyes searching yours.

"Did I pick a bad movie?" he whispered, leaning in to kiss your lips softly.

"Mm... no, it was amazing," you whispered against his lips, trying to muster a smile. "Just... sad. I'm not really into dramas," you added with a forced laugh. As you leaned in to kiss him again, he pulled back slightly.

"You look beyond beautiful tonight, but there's something in your eyes... a sadness," he observed, his tone soft yet tied with concern. "You stepped out of the theater more than once, and I can't shake the feeling that it wasn't just the movie weighing on you. Why don't you head home and rest? Tomorrow's another day for us to enjoy each other's company right?” he smiled pressing his forehead against mine. 

“Nanami I don’t deserve you do I?” you muttered as the two of you walked out the theater cradled in each others arms. As he kissed you goodbye you opened your purse to find 2 hour old messages from Satoru.

Bought the kids take out hope you don’t mind

I don’t know if you want them to stay over but they’re asleep

As you drove, your mind raced with questions about how to handle picking up the kids. Should you say something? Should you ask for his help getting them to the car? No, that wouldn't be right. Lost in thought, you found yourself in front of his house sooner than expected. Taking a deep breath, you approached the front door and lightly tapped on it with your knuckles.

"Satoru, it's me," you whispered. Almost instantly, the door swung open, and your eyes met. There he stood, looking disheveled. His hair looked as if it had been untouched for days, and his eyes were reddened, as if he'd been crying for hours.

"You look la mess" you murmured, to which he scoffed, "You're one to talk," his eyes darting to the red smeared lipstick on your face. "How were your 'plans'?" he asked, his tone a mix of sarcasm and barely concealed anger. His breath carried the unmistakable scent of alcohol, worrying you with the kids in the house.

"Satoru, you've been drinking again, haven't you?" you yelled. "Where are Yugo and Kyo?" you demanded, pushing past him. 

"They're fine, (Y/N)! They're my kids! Do you really think I'd hurt them?" he shouted, his voice escalating. "You’re probably too busy to think about that when your mind is on other men though right?!" he accused, closing the distance between the two of you.

"Satoru—"  you began, but before you could finish, he had pressed your body against the wall, his hot breath mingling with that of your own.

Slithering his coarse hands between your thighs he felt the absence of your panties. 

“You never dressed like this for me, was I just not good enough for you?” He whined as his fingers found their way to your core, teasing your clit."I've already cut off everyone—my mother, my sister, everyone. I'd cut off the whole world to have you back with me," he groaned into your ear. “Satoru.. You aren’t in your right s-state of mind right now..” you muttered stumbling over your words “the kids are here..”

"The kids want us to be together, can't you see? Kyoko told me how much you miss me. She said that when you're alone in your room, you whisper my name, pleading and begging for me, are you that desperate and needy to be filled? Does he just not do it for you?” You opened your mouth but before you could answer his his fingers slammed in your pussy making your body jerk with a cry.

"(Y/N)..." he whispered, biting down on the rim of your ear. "Tell me you don't want me, and I'll leave. I'll let you go forever, just as you want me to," he growled, his lips brushing against yours.

His touch was like a key turning in a lock, unlocking a flood of memories that surged through your mind. Each sensation seemed to echo with the past—every whispered word, every shared laugh, and every tender moment you had once cherished together. The feelings you'd buried deep inside started to resurface, tugging at your heartstrings and making your pulse quicken. It was as if time had rewound, pulling you back into the whirlwind of emotions you once knew so well.

Your silence was enough of an answer for him as he kissed up your neck. Allowing you to lean back onto him with your head on his chest. Soft moans falling past your lips as you let yourself grind on his fingers. Another loud cry filling the air when he landed it hard on your ass instead.

Carrying you to his couch he plowed you on the red leather sofa the two of you bought after you gave birth you the texture brought you back so many memories but between that and satoru touching you your midn went blank 

"Look at yourself." He commanded sternly, forcing your head upward until you gazed at your reflection in the foggy window. Your eyes widening in embarrassment as you realized the state you were in. "Gonna give you another set of twins, triplets even, you want that baby?"

Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes, but you quickly nodded, desperation filling your heart. You needed him so badly; you longed for his cock to fill the emptiness inside of you. 

"Ahh, fuck." Another sharp slap echoed through the room, stinging your already tender ass. "So you do talk" He smirked, eager to hear the words he desired. "Please fuck me."

He chuckled, enjoying your pathetic submission. "You can do better than that, baby." His deep voice sent shivers down your spine. "Please. Please fuck me Toru. I've been so alone, aching for you. W-want you to fill me up." You pleaded, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks.

"That's it. That's my slutty girl." His eyes gleamed with satisfaction as he thrust into you, claiming your wet entrance with a single powerful stroke. Your knees buckled beneath you, and your back arched involuntarily as his thick cock stretched you wide. You could feel the swollen tissue near your cervix protesting against the relentless invasion.

A low growl escaped your throat as his hand wrapped around your neck, pulling you closer to him on the sofa. Your hands instinctively pressed against your back, feeling the rough fabric beneath your fingertips. Your heart pounded wildly, your body responding to his dominance.

Just as you were about to reach your climax, the room was suddenly interrupted by the shrill ringing of your phone. Satoru's eyes narrowed, his grip on your neck tightening momentarily. He snatched the device from off the floor, his gaze fixed on the glowing screen. Jealousy flared in his eyes as he recognized the caller ID: “Nanami <3”

"Toru, please, just put it away," you begged, tears starting to form. But before you could say anything more, he answered  tossing the phone on-top of you, his smile smug, as if he'd just won the lottery.

"H-hello, Nanami," you stammered, trying to catch your breath as Satoru sped up. "Sweetheart, you sound terrible. Are you sick?" he asked, sounding genuinely concerned. You felt a lump in your throat, torn between guilt and pleasure. Ripping the bandaid off you blurted out "Nanami, we can't see each other anymore!" before abruptly hanging up. 

Once again, you were caught in Satoru's snare, the familiar sting of knowing you were heading for heartbreak not enough to make you turn back. Despite the pain you knew was coming, something inside you couldn't let go, couldn't stop yourself from falling into the same old pattern, even if it meant ignoring the chance for something real with Nanami.

"Good girl..." he hummed, his voice thick with lust as he slammed into you. Each thrust sent shockwaves of pleasure and pain throughout your body, leaving you breathless and vulnerable. "You know I just want the best for you, for us, for our kids," he blurted out in the heat of the moment. His words were laced with sincerity and madness, blurring the lines between love and manipulation.

Your heart raced, unsure whether you should trust him or run as far away as possible. But the intensity of his touch, the way he claimed your body, made it hard to resist his charms. You moaned softly, your nails digging into his broad shoulders.

Good girl..." he hummed, his voice thick with lust as he slammed into you. Each thrust sent shockwaves of pleasure and pain throughout your body, leaving you breathless and vulnerable. "You know I just want the best for you, for us, for our kids," he blurted out in the heat of the moment. His words were laced with sincerity and madness, blurring the lines between love and manipulation.

Your moans filled the room, a testament to your surrender. As you both reached your climax sloppily kissed you “Get pregnant.. m’gonna have you all to myself” he blurted throughout kisses as his eyes gleamed with anticipation envisioning your soon to be large belly.

You let out a loud defeated whimper, feeling the warm residue trickle from inside of you as he pulled out. Your senses swam in a haze as your eyelids fluttered shut, and you went limp in his arms, surrendering to the overwhelming emotions and fatigue. He cradled you gently, his gaze fixed on your face as you drifted in and out of consciousness. 

---

Waking up to the familiar scent of pancakes, memories of lazy breakfasts from your honeymoon in the states flooded back. Blinking your eyes open, you tried to sit up but quickly realized something was off. The room around you wasn't yours—it was Satoru's. Confused, you scanned the space, spotting your own furniture awkwardly placed among his belongings as if he had moved all your stuff  in.

Slipping out of bed in one of Satoru's oversized shirts, the scent of freshly brewed pancakes grew stronger as you made your way downstairs. As you descended, the sounds of morning chatter became clearer. There, in the kitchen, you found Satoru at the stove, flipping pancakes, with Kyoko in a high chair, happily munching away. Yugo, spotting you, abandoned his toy cars and rushed over, wrapping his little arms around your leg.

"Mommy, mommy!" he cheered, his eyes shining with excitement. "Papa says you're staying together forever, and we're gonna have little  brothers and sisters!"

Your heart skipped a beat as you shot a pointed look at Satoru, who paused mid-flip, giving you an awkward, guilty smile. 

You truly despised him with every fiber of your being, yet there was a burning desire in you that betrayed your feelings. 

“Gojo Satoru what have you done to me..”

[lemotmo]

Unfortunately, probably so

Q. He's been on set. They're just not showing him there yet. You're out of your mind if you think he's not there.

Q. Honest thoughts: is he going to be in season 8 or no?

A. I don't believe he has been on set yet, anon. I do think he will be there but it's pretty obvious that he hasn't been there yet. Perhaps you can check the fake Twitter account for his exact whereabouts. Second anon, yes I believe he will be around for at least most of 8a. I don't think we will see that much of him but I think he'll be around. I don't trust Tim at all to not play with that dynamic a bit. He has said several times in the past that he hasn't defined Buddie yet because he likes the idea of relationship drama. If the plan is actually Buddie, I don't think he will be able to resist using Tommy to create some drama. Once he puts Buck/Eddie together that is it relationship wise, that is their endgame so drama for them, at least in the way Tim talks about things, will have to be manufactured in other ways. I love a lot of things about Tim but I don't trust him at all to not use Tommy to build up the drama pre Buddie. Especially if they did bring in Lone Star writers. They just write completely differently tone wise. I absolutely loathe the idea because it will be virtually unbearable around here throughout that entire process, and it's possible, given the behavior that Tim became aware of, that he changed direction a bit, but I still don't trust him to get there in the best way. It's just too easy of a route to take. There have been a few people who managed to figure out that the cameo videos came to a stop around the same time they started writing for the season. So along with whatever conversation took place, I'm sure Lou got his final episode count and just decided to go ahead and walk away from them. So while I think his return will still only be a handful of episodes I think it's going to be a rough handful of episodes. If I get canon Buddie out of the drama I don't care how we get there, but I know lots of people do so I want to try and prepare myself now. And once it becomes apparent that Tommy is just drama in the lead up to Buddie his people are going to become downright unbearable. I'm very excited about lots of things but I just want to get his part over with.

For the record, anon, I'm praying like crazy that I'm wrong. I want to be wrong. I want to be wrong so badly.

Thank you Nonny!

Yeah, I also expect Lou there for a few more scenes. It'll suck to find out that he's on set. Not because of him specifically, because it will give the storyline a fitting ending on screen and it might be interesting to watch it play out for Buck as a character. (Even though I agree that, if Tim really wanted to, he could make Buddie happen without the Tommy factor involved.)

But because of the reaction of a certain subset of the fandom. The loud Tommy stans will be proclaiming that Lou is there as a main now and he's going to ask Buck to marry him or something unhinged like that. And then when they realise, during season 8, that BT's relationship isn't going to last very long, they'll throw a loud tantrum like a bunch of 5 year olds who don't get a sweet before dinner.

I'm just over all of that nonsense.

What this fandom needs right now is some peace without a very loud minority trying to harsh our buzz.

Also, to be honest... I don't care how they make Buddie canon either. I've been here for 6 seasons now. I'm tired. The time is now. However they do it, I'll just be happy about it, no matter how it happens.

And finally, I'm also manifesting that Ali (and me as well) is wrong. Very very wrong indeed. Sorry my dear. :)

IMPORTANT! Please don't repost this ask and/or a link that leads straight to my Tumblr account on Twitter or any other social media. Thank you!

Heads up! For anyone who is giving me the shifty eyes for reposting Ali's updates instead of reblogging. Read this.

Remember, no hate in comments, reblogs or inboxes. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.

If you are interested in more of Ali’s posts, you can find all of her posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.

[aishangotome]

Elbert Greetia: Blind Love Ending Chapter 22

Blind Love Chapter 21

♡———♡

Elbert: Ah... I remember one more thing--

Elbert stared blankly at the owl specimen with vacant eyes.

Elbert: My father loved birds.

Kate: ...Is that why there are so many owl specimens?

Elbert: Maybe... I think I was more drawn to them than other things.

Elbert: Come to think of it, both of them loved things that fly...

Elbert's memories quietly overflowed like water gushing from a spring.

His voice, filled with nostalgia for something he could never get back, was warm and somewhat lonely, and just listening to it made my chest ache.

Elbert: And they both loved beautiful landscapes. Especially... paintings of the sea.

(Paintings of the sea...)

*Flashback*

Elbert: ...I want that.

*Flashback over*

(At that time... I thought he wanted to get the painting of the sea because everyone said it was "beautiful," but...)

(Maybe it was different...)

Butterfly specimens, bird specimens, paintings of the sea.

Maybe Elbert's own heart wanted them.

(Because they were things that the two people he "stole happiness from" loved.)

Kate: Lord Elbert... you wanted them to be happy, didn't you?

Elbert: ...It's not that pure of a feeling.

Elbert: I... I just wanted them to forgive me for being alive.

Elbert: I knew somewhere in my heart that it was meaningless... but I clung to the pain of wanting and getting things over and over again.

Elbert: My father used to say... that when I was suffering, his heart would be at peace.

(...!)

His father, who said that, must have been in unbearable pain too, but when I think of young Elbert being told such a curse, I feel anger and sadness welling up, and I hug Elbert tightly.

Elbert: ...Kate?

Kate: ...It's not meaningless.

Kate: I... I said it earlier, didn't I? Things that have feelings put into them have meaning.

Kate: Everything here...

Kate: It's filled with your feelings of wanting to make them happy, isn't it?

Even though I tried to stay calm and suppress my emotions, my voice trembled.

Elbert: ...Kate.

Kate: At first, I thought this room was a very lonely room. I thought it was cold and unfriendly.

Kate: But... now I think it's very beautiful.

Of course, not everything is beautiful in the conventional sense.

There might be things he obtained by taking innocent lives or things he took from someone else, causing them sadness.

(But... even so...)

The things collected in the room seemed to speak of Elbert's earnest feelings, so painful it was almost tangible.

---"Please smile."

Kate: ...To me, it looks like a very, very beautiful room.

Elbert: ...

Elbert: ...I think it's very messy, though.

Kate: That's not what I meant...

Elbert: ...Yeah, sorry. ...I know.

Elbert: ...Thank you.

Elbert: You said before... that even if something is ugly to 99 people, for one person,

Elbert: It might be the most beautiful thing in the world.

Elbert: ...If I could be something beautiful to you, I don't think I would care if 99 people hated me.

(Elbert...)

His voice was still hesitant, as if he was still unsure, but his words were a dazzling hope for me.

Kate: To me, you've been the most beautiful person in the world for a long time now.

Elbert: ...Thank you.

Elbert hugged me back tightly as if to confirm it, then looked back at the room and muttered.

Elbert: I've never offered anything to their graves before.

Elbert: Because the moment anything became mine... it stopped being beautiful.

Elbert: ...I felt like they wouldn't be happy with anything I got.

There was no sadness in his voice; it felt flat.

Kate: You "felt" that way, but what about... now?

Elbert: Now...

After a long silence, Elbert's lips moved.

Elbert: Now, I'm... imagining how I would feel if I offered something.

(...!)

I had a feeling that the past sins that had entangled him were gradually unraveling.

Kate: ...If you're going to offer something,

Kate: Can I go with you?

Elbert: Yes, of course.

Elbert: The graveyard is a little far from here... it will take a few days to travel.

Elbert: I can't bear to be away from you for days.

-

The crimson-dyed leaves rippled with every gust of wind.

---Elbert's parents were sleeping on this hill overlooking the sea.

Alfons: To Cecilia Greetia and Hugh Greetia.

Alfons: I've lived in the Greetia mansion for years, but this is the first time I've greeted you.

Roger: So, are we digging up this grave today?

Kate: To be precise, we're burying burial goods.

Elbert: Thanks, Al, Roger.

Elbert: Kate and I couldn't carry everything... so it's a big help.

We decided to carry some of the collection to the grave, but Roger and Alfons saw us struggling to carry them out of the room and offered to accompany us.

Kate: We really appreciate it.

Roger: Well, I'm going to get paid handsomely. Don't worry about it.

Kate: Payment... you mean money?

Roger: No. Something more interesting.

Kate: Something interesting...?

Roger grinned like a predator trapping its prey and whispered in my ear.

Roger: If El's collecting habit is rooted in the past, will the curse of "greed" fade as his burdens are lifted...?

Roger: Or will the "greed" remain the same, just with a different target...? You're curious, aren't you?

(I see... information about the "curse" is Roger's reward...)

Elbert: Roger.

Kate: Eek!?

Just as I was about to agree, I was hugged tightly from behind, and my shoulders trembled.

Elbert: ...You're too close to Kate.

Roger: My bad.

Roger laughed, holding up his hands, and winked at me.

Roger: From the looks of it, it seems like you already have the answer.

(...? What does he mean?)

Elbert: What were you talking about?

Kate: ...We were talking about how Roger is curious about how you'll change from now on.

Elbert: ...? ...??

Roger: It's exactly what it sounds like, just ignore it.

Alfons: Well, let's not stand around chatting, let's get on with digging up the grave.

Roger: "Let's," he says, as if he's not going to do it too. Here, shovel.

Alfons: Ah, too bad. I sprained my wrist yesterday and now I can't hold anything heavier than a kitten.

Elbert: Is that so...?

Alfons: So, I'll leave the manual labor to Roger and El. Here's your shovel.

Elbert: ...Alright, I understand.

(Did Alfons just hold a shovel in his hand...?)

Roger: Our greedy queen believes Al's nonsense too easily.

Kate: There was another shovel, wasn't there? I'll help too.

Elbert: ...No.

Kate: Huh...?

Elbert: I don't want your hands to get hurt... Just wait.

Kate: But...

Elbert held my hand preciously and stared at me intently, not seeming to budge an inch.

Kate: Um...

(When Elbert looks at me silently like that... I can't refuse anything.)

(I can tell he's... trying his best to care for me.)

My cheeks warmed up, and I quietly lowered my head.

Kate: ...Alright.

Elbert: ...Mm.

Then, thanks to Elbert's hesitant handling of the shovel and Roger's help, two black coffins eventually emerged.

Elbert and I placed the collected items on top of them and covered them with soil once more.

Burying was easier than digging up... and the two coffins and beautiful collection items quickly disappeared from sight.

Elbert: ...

With the strong wind blowing from the sea, Elbert's golden hair fluttered as he stared at the names engraved on the tombstone.

(...Even I, who only heard about Elbert's past from others,)

(...his feelings for his parents are very... complicated.)

Emotions that I couldn't put into words were swirling in my chest.

(Elbert's heart... must be filled with even more unorganized feelings.)

Roger: It looks like we should leave him alone for a while.

Alfons: Yes. Let's go back to the carriage first and take a nap.

(As for me...)

Kate: ...Lord Elbert.

Elbert: ...Hm?

Kate: I'll wait for you... a little further away.

Elbert: ...Ah, thank you.

I watched Alfons and Roger walk back to the carriage, and waited for Elbert at the edge of the cemetery, a little way down the hill.

(How is he feeling right now...?)

(Sad? Painful? Or... a little easier to breathe?)

(No matter how he feels when he comes back... I want to be there for him.)

After a while, I heard Elbert's footsteps walking towards me.

Kate: ...Is it okay now?

Elbert: Yeah... it's okay now.

Elbert smiled and looked back at the tombstone on the hill.

Elbert: ...I thought I would want to apologize if I came here.

Elbert: But no apologies came out.

Kate: ...Can I ask what you talked about?

Elbert: ...Just..

Elbert: Just... that I wanted to live with them.

Elbert: Even if it was a relationship where we hurt each other just by being close.

Kate: ...!

For a moment, my eyes felt hot, but I held it back.

Elbert's voice didn't sound like he was lamenting the unchangeable past.

Elbert: But... it must have been too painful for them.

Elbert: I... I couldn't give up on living and being happy.

Elbert: Is this also the curse of "greed"?

Kate: If so...

Kate: If that's a curse... then I'm glad.

Kate: I'm glad you're greedy, Lord Elbert...

Elbert: ...

Kate: I truly, truly think it's a good thing...

Elbert: Kate...

My feelings overflowed, and the tears I had held back earlier threatened to spill.

Elbert gently stroked my eyes, which had not yet shed any tears.

Elbert: ...No one has ever said that to me before.

Elbert: Al always says it's a hassle.

Kate: ...Hehe... That's so like Alfons.

I was happy with Elbert's kindness in joking around, and the smile that spilled out was a little wet.

Elbert: I feel refreshed somehow.

Kate: ...Do you think you won't want to collect beautiful things anymore?

Elbert: I guess so...

Elbert: My sins... will probably never disappear...

Elbert: But I'll stop collecting things to atone for them.

Elbert: I have more important things to do now.

Kate: More important things...?

Elbert's deep sea blue eyes shot straight at me.

(...!?)

At that moment, my breath stopped.

I was so captivated by his gaze that I couldn't move.

Elbert: The most beautiful thing in the world to me--

Elbert: --To protect you.

A sticky possessiveness colored the blue of his eyes.

(If the "greed" determined by the curse doesn't change, only the target...)

(If Elbert, who desires endlessly, his next target is--)

Elbert: Shall we go then?

Elbert: If we keep Al and Roger waiting too long... they'll scold us.

Kate: Y-Yes.

I have a feeling that he, who was once fragile, is transforming into something else.

In a narrow, dark place like a coffin, he awakens from a long sleep... Will it be a butterfly that spreads its wings, or something else--?

.

.

.

.

.

Blind Love Chapter 23

If you’d like to support my translations, feel free to buy me a coffee here! :)

[weenwrites]

hello hope youre having a good day!! would you mind writing romantic scenarios for ultra magnus and bulkhead (separately) getting stuck in a storm in an area out of communication range while on recon with the reader?

Out in the Rain

Summary - Rainy days are always better spent under the cover of shade with a friend. Characters - Bulkhead Content - Fluff Category - Scenarios Trigger Warnings - None

✎ A/N: Sorry this took a long time for me to write! And since this has been sitting in my drafts for too long I've decided to just submit this with only Bulkhead.

Reconnaissance missions were almost always dull and boring. Drive around, look for any Decepticon activity, come back and report to base. Although it lasted for at least a couple hours, it felt like days whenever there wasn’t anything to report. Luckily for Bulkhead, whenever Y/N tagged along, recon missions became less drab and dull, they became more bearable with their company. And he couldn’t be any more thankful for their company on this mission in particular.

There had been nothing to report, and dark gray clouds began rolling in from above, bringing with them what looked to be heavy rainfall. Now Bulkhead did of course enjoy the great outdoors and what wonders Earth had to offer, and while Earth’s rain wasn’t anything like the acid rain on Cybertron it was still just as horrible, because huge gray clouds like those often entertained the possibility of bringing hail or lightning with them.

“The rain seems to be getting worse, Bulk.” Y/N remarks, noticing as his rear view mirrors adjust to see them in the reflection. “We might have a storm coming—”

“Whoah!” He made a sharp turn to the right, narrowly avoiding the lightning that nearly smote him. “You alright?” He queried after feeling their body slam into him.

“Yeah, don’t worry about me Bulk, we need to worry about getting back to base.”

“Right! Getting back to base, I’ll call them.” Bulkhead replied, driving on even as hail began to pelt him relentlessly. “Bulkhead to base, do you read me?”

There was no reply from the other end of the line, there would be only silence if there was no hail raining down from the skies, or the crackle and boom of lightning outside.

“Hello? Base, do you read me?” He repeated, hoping for a response. “Scrap, the clouds must be interfering with the signal…”

“Well what next, then?”

“We find some shelter until this storm passes.”

He swerved off-road, down a patchy dirt road and toward a grove of trees.

"We shouldn't stay under a tree, we could get struck." Y/N warned.

"Don't plan to." Bulkhead replies, slowly swerving along the road through the rain, "I'm just checking where this leads us."

Y/N slowly nodded, watching the greenery pass by as the two of them continued down the road. It didn't take long for them to arrive at a

"Thunderstorms on Earth are a whole lot less worse than they are on Cybertron."

"Bet they must be horrible on a planet made completely out of metal, huh?"

He chuckled, "yeah, it was pretty common to see a couple of bots get struck all at once, or even drop dead cus' of a single bolt."

"Yeesh... And the acid rain?"

"The acid rain back home could eat through metal like water eats through paper! Smaller bots couldn't even survive a day out in rain like this..."

"Man, that sounds unbearable..." They mumbled, finding it a bit baffling to imagine a planet where acid rain was lethal, "Would you say that the rain storms here aren't as bad?"

"Yeah, they're definitely way less worse..." He chuckled, "you know, the first time it rained here, the whole team freaked out. We didn't know that it rained water so we stayed under shelter until it passed. It was only when Fowler came along, that we learned that it was harmless."

"And you didn't see for yourself that the rain was completely safe given the fact that nothing was corroding during the rain?"

"Well--well, we all assumed that the native life must've adapted to be immune to the rain." He argued as they only laughed.

"Yeah, sure you did!" They smiled, "sure you just thought everyone adapted to it rather than noticing that everything was perfectly fine during and after the rainstorm."

"I wasn't the only one who thought that! You should've seen the way Bumblebee shook when he made it inside just before the rain touched him for the first time."

"Ah, really now?"

"Why are you saying it like that?"

"No reason, don't mind me," they snickered, "but do go on about Bee, tell me what happened."

"Well when it happened, it was his first official mission on Earth..."

[deeptrashwitch]

A Haunting Past (part 13)

This is the last appearence of Aly (@alypink OC) and the WTF (@islandtarochips OCs) until the end of this serie! So thank you so much for letting me include your OCs here, queridas! They were so funny to write and made the story a lot more dinamic :3 LOVE YOU!!

Also, as usual, thanks and a shout out to my bestie @islandtarochips for being my beta reader. You're marvelous 💖💖

Taglist: @alypink @stuffireadandenjoy @snootlestheangel @islandtarochips @raresvtm

@piouswolf @midnight193 @mutantthedark @justasmolbard @welldonekhushi

@tapioca-milktea1978 @imagoddamnonionmason

Tw: This part has no triggers! So it's safe to read, enjoy it ^^

Alicia was sitting behind her desk, her mind once again going through all the possibilities about Artemis' death. With a long sigh she passed a hand down her face, bouncing her leg out of pure stress. As she leaned against her chair the silence became unbearable and again her thoughts went over and over everything. Especially William's cause of death.

Haloperidol. An antipsychotic used for many illnesses, two of them are schizophrenia and panic disorder. It only made her remember the last time she spoke with William, he told her about his diagnosis of severe panic disorder and it only made her wonder one thing. Who else knew? No matter how long she thought about it, there was no way William's wife or kids did that…then who?

Soon Wraith called her back to reality. It was time for the WTF, Aly and Lily to go back to their homes. In silence Alicia nodded and went to the yard with her sunglasses covering her tired eyes. She managed to smile a bit as she shook hands with Agnes, Nigel and Aelan, noticing that her team basically monopolized them to chat for a while before they headed towards the airport. Then she looked at Aly, Lily, Kanoa and Tiala as she tried to smile more when she noticed how they were already exchanging their goodbyes.

She hugged Aly first and poked Lily's cheek. "Thanks for everything, Aly. Come back whenever you have the chance to visit. My doors are always open for you and Lily."

"Maybe when everything is done, okay?" Aly said with a soft smile. "Take care, Licia, you're doing great."

"Thank you…"

After that the Humvee that came for Aly and Lily left Black Tomb. For a second she didn't move, then she went to speak with Tiala and Kanoa. She hugged Tiala tightly as she thanked her for coming to help.

"Don't thank me, that's part of our work." She said jokingly before leaning back as she gave the Captain a small and friendly smile. "Also, what are friends for? I'm happy we could help even for just a little bit."

Alicia smiled a bit. "You helped us more than you think. WAY more."

"Good to know, Licia. By the way, are you okay? You seem tired, more than usual."

"I'll be fine," Alicia said as she looked away, "don't worry, Tia, it's just…a memory."

Tiala looked at her worried. "I see. I hope you find some rest and peace soon."

"...I hope the same. I'll keep you informed if anything happens." 

"Yeah, thanks. Take care, seriously." 

Alicia nodded and then looked at Kanoa, who simply hugged her in silence. For a minute they stayed like that and Alicia didn't say anything as a tear ran down her face.

"Please, Licia…if anything happens…you can always call me or Tia." Kanoa said softly, tightening the hug.

"I will." She promised as she closed her eyes. "I just need time to sort this out but don't worry, I don't intend to give up on anything now."

"Lelei..."

Alicia scoffed and smiled sadly. "Sorry for worrying you, Noa."

"Don't say sorry. Just get well soon."

"I will, I promise."

Then they broke the hug and Alicia stared down as the two vehicles that transported the WTF also left the base. In silence, the smile on her face disappeared and her shoulders fell with tiredness. At the same time, Wraith impulsed herself off the wall she was leaning into and walked towards the tiring Captain.

"You can't keep doing this." Dominique said with a sigh. 

"If it's for the clash of interests-"

"It's not that. I see how tired you are. Since Brazil you've been going on without rest and being stress of all of this. This isn't helping."

"So what? You'll send me to medical leave as the Marines did?" Alicia asked bitter and rudely. "Am I that discardable?"

"Alicia…"

Then she sighed and put a hand over her face. "I'm sorry, I…"

"...Take a rest, at least two or three days. Go home."

"I guess it's for the best, huh?"

"For your health."

Alicia nodded and simply looked at where her team was. "Luke, you're in charge while I'm gone."

"Alicia? Are you going somewhere?" Luke asked, surprised as he looked at his Captain.

"I'll go home for a few days. Please keep the base running, yeah?" 

"Uh, yeah, sure." 

"Thanks, boy."

And like that Alicia left Black Tomb that same night towards her parents' ranch. Once there, she put on a good face as she hugged her mom and helped her dad inside his workshop. Trying to keep up with the jokes as she was thankful that her siblings weren't there. 

And once the night arrived. She found herself inside the same room she stayed in during that year she was out. 

She left the bag over the bed and in the middle of the silence and the darkness, she sighed heavily as the thoughts started again. However, this time she wasn't wondering about anything. Now she simply started to laugh in silence as she felt her blood boil and as soon she saw the damn badge of that operation. Something snapped. A deadly anger crossed her face in a second.

With a rageful scream, she threw down everything over her desk and her breathing became shallow. In the middle of her anger, she kicked her chair and broke a leg of it before throwing the stupid badge against the wall. She calmed down after a while and she stared at the disaster inside that room, just to feel disgust.

It was like those days when she was back from Angola. It felt like she was that version of herself that she tried to hide. The remains of the Guardian she once was.

"Oh God…what am I doing?" She whispered as she let herself collapse on the floor. 

In silence she hugged her knees while the silence took over again and the mess that was around her stayed still. She denied herself to break or even to admit what she really wanted. It wasn't the time and neither a good idea for her to do.

Days passed and Alicia received some little updates from Luke about Black Tomb but nothing big. She left her phone over her desk before going outside as she sat under a tree and closed her eyes with a long sigh. For a while she stayed like that before the sound of soft crunch on the grass caught her attention and it made her open her eyes. When she straightened up a bit, her eyes widened.

"Alejo?" She asked surprised.

He smiled sadly. "Hey amor. I hope I'm not late or arriving on a bad moment?" 

"No, I…was just taking a break from work, that's all." 

"Good to know."

He sat beside her and they didn't say a word for a moment.

"I assume you have an answer, right?" Alicia asked.

"Yeah."

"Y'know, I get it. I kinda know what you're gonna say and…I can't blame you. I'd leave too." Alicia said with her voice broken and almost on the verge of tears.

"I'm not leaving."

"What?" 

"My answer is still the same as I gave you once." He said as he gave her a soft expression before cupping her face. "No matter what you did or what you have done. I'll stay."

Alicia shook her head as she closed her eyes and cried in silence. "You…you don't even know what's going on inside my head. The kind of thoughts I have."

"I will stay anyway." 

"I might lose myself in all of this."

"I won't let you."

"There might be a point when I'll become a monster, y'know?"

Alejandro cleaned her tears gently. "You aren't a monster, I don't think you'll ever be. I'm sorry I wasn't here earlier…"

Alicia started to choke on a sob before hugging Alejandro as she rested her head against his chest. She started to cry. All the stress, the pain, the sadness and the fear she felt slowly started to bubble up as she cried. Meanwhile Alejandro just held her in silence, feeling impotence as he saw all the pain his lover had endured all this time. For a while they stayed in that position until Alicia ran out of tears and just looked at Alejandro with her red puffy eyes from crying.

"I'm quite curious about something." Alejandro asked cautiously.

Alicia sighed and smiled tiredly. "Is it about Firewall?" 

"More or less, I just need to understand how you came to that point." 

"Remember when we first broke up?" 

"I do. You had an offer and I assume it was for the 267."

She nodded calmly as she stared at the landscape. "As I became a Sergeant, I was offered a place inside the 267. I was really happy about that."

"Yeah, I bet you were really excited."

"Almost as much as you when you were accepted into the Los Vaqueros too."

"True, we were both really excited. It…feels like a long time ago."

"It was a long time ago." Alicia said with a tired chuckle.

Alejandro smiled softly. "...How was the 267?" 

"They…they were amazing. We were some of the best Marines across the US. At least in the continental US." She said with a sad tone of voice. "I arrived while Artemis was Captain and Deepwater was Lieutenant, they were good leaders."

"Artemis? Deepwater?" Alejandro asked confusingly. Since he never heard of those names before.

"William was Artemis, he got the nickname because of his aim. The bastard was a grumpy asshole and he made us train until we almost collapsed. He was…the one that encouraged me to volunteer for the Lanceros course, I mean, I had the idea but he gave me the last push, y'know?"

"He sounds like a good man."

"He was. And well, Oliver is Deepwater because of his apnea record. We met inside the 267 and we became friends soon enough. He has always been mysterious and cynical too, but always had a good joke or some snarky comment to make." Alicia said with a sad smile. "When he became Captain…he became a bit colder, but other than that, he was the same."

"Was? Like, in the past?" 

Alicia sighed and closed her eyes, leaning her back against the tree. "After Operation Firewall and the case Broken Statue, he blamed me for letting my people die. And honestly? For a while I agreed, and he became colder and more resented against me by the day."

"I see."

"He still is cold because of what happened, maybe also because William died and I wasn't there to even say goodbye."

Alejandro nodded and sighed softly. "Alicia, I just want to know something more."

"Shoot."

"If you find out who betrayed you, what will you do?"

"Honestly……I have no idea." Alicia admitted with a sigh, "For so much time I thought I'd feel AFRAID of ever knowing, but…"

"But?"

"I'm ANGRY…to a point I think I might be able to kill that person if I ever learn who it was. And yet, at the same time I feel like it wouldn't be the right thing to do."

"Would you forgive them?" 

"No, I'll never. But I don't think I'll kill them myself either. I have so much to lose."

Alejandro nodded in silence and simply hugged her gently, to which she just leaned against him with a sigh. Soon Andrea, Alicia's mom, poked her head outside of the house looking for Alicia.

"Oh, sorry if I interrupted." She said with a chuckle. "But your phone's ringing, Andina, seems urgent." 

Alicia frowned slightly. "Uh, did you see if the number was private or had a name, mom?" 

"It said Deepwater, does it ring a bell?”

“Actually, it does.” Alicia murmured confused, then looked at Alejandro. “Sorry cariño, you mind if I-?”

Alejandro nodded. “No worries, go ahead.”

Alicia smiled and kissed his forehead before heading inside. Once inside the house, she took her phone and frowned slightly at the number. She was quite confused seeing that it was Oliver, from all the people, who was calling her. Despite that, she answered.

“Hello?”

“Captain Marchant.” Oliver said, a bit irritated. “I assume you’re free right now?”

“Yes, sir.” She answered a bit tensely. “I’m on a little leave right now.”

“Good, I hope you have time to spare me and speak, Captain?”

Alicia was weirded out for the sudden request. “Sir…?”

Oliver sighed and his tone changed, to one that Alicia hadn’t heard in a long time. “Please, Alicia, we really need to speak. And this is as an old friend more than as your superior.”

“I’m not anywhere near Camp Lejeune.”

“That won’t be needed, I’m in Texas, in Arlington to be specific. Can we meet and get a drink?”

Alicia doubted for a second. “How long will you stay?”

“Two days more.”

“Let’s meet tomorrow.”

“Marvelous, we have a lot to discuss together. See you soon, Alicia, looking forward to it.” Oliver said kindly before hanging up the call.

When it finished, Alicia stayed there for a second with mixed feelings. On one hand, it was weird hearing Oliver being so civil and kind to her. But on the other hand, it just reminded her of the old days, the good ones. For a second she tried to understand what he would want to speak about, but…she really had no clue. She just needs to be patient and find out tomorrow.

[corrodedseraphine]

timezone | #1 only thing that keeps us apart is a different timezone

pairing: eddie munson x fem!reader

chapter summary: Despite the love that is between you, the time has come to part ways with Eddie so that he can fully enjoy the wild chase of his dreams.

TW: smut (or an attempt to write one) but very tiny metion of it because I am not good at writing it I am sorry if it's bad

the story is also avaliable on ao3

masterlist | eddie munson masterlist | general masterlist

This chapter is a little short, but I hope it's not too bad! You can expect an explanation of the situation with Chrissy in the next chapter, I hope you don't feel discouraged by it. Moreover, I apologize for the poor attempt to write smut, writing such things is still new to me

When you woke up it was still dark. It couldn't have been earlier than 2 am. His arm hugged you around the waist and from behind you you could hear quiet snoring. Feeling like you were thirsty, you slowly released yourself from the embrace and dressed some old Eddie's T-shirt that was lying on the floor by the dresser. Somewhere in the darkness you also managed to find your panties on the floor among the rest of the clothes scattered on it. The night was pleasantly quiet and peaceful. No screams or sudden noises or crackling. Just the quiet hum of the wind. Leaving the room you went down to the kitchen and poured two glasses of water, you knew that when Eddie woke up he would whine that he was thirsty. When you returned he was lying on his back snoring even louder. You just smiled and shook your head. You remembered how at the beginning of your relationship, during your first nights together, this snoring was unbearable. You were able to wake up several times in one night and then him only to have him roll over on his side, because then at least he didn't sound like an old tractor. Who would have thought that one day you would miss it. Despite the fact that he was at your fingertips you already felt a longing that crushed your heart. The thought that this was your last night together was like a death sentence. It was the last time you could feel the warmth of his body and hear his voice directed only to you. 

When Eddie recovered fully from his experiences in the Upside Down Dr. Owens activated some of his connections and managed to get Corroded Coffin a contract with one of the music labels in New York. Without a second thought, they immediately accepted the offer. It was the fulfillment of their dreams. For you and Robin, he managed to ensure a place at the University of California, which you also agreed to, knowing that this was your only chance to escape Hawkins and if it weren't for this you probably would never have been able to afford college in your lives. Steve, to everyone's surprise, turned down the offer to go to college. Instead, with a little help from Owens, he managed to open a bar on the beach in California, which very quickly became one of the most popular. 

Thus, a new door opened before you, but it led to two opposite ends. You loved Eddie with all your heart, so no matter how much it hurt you wanted him to realize his dreams, to enjoy life as much as he could, so after many hours of conversations, you both came to the conclusion that you would take a break. You didn't want to be the reason he had to limit himself, and you also preferred to avoid situations that could get out of hand if you still stayed together and tried a long-distance relationship. You wanted him to have a full rockstar experience. Never in your life would you want to be the reason why he should regret holding back from something solely because of you. So this solution seemed to be the most reasonable for you. 

"Babe?" his sleepy voice snapped you out of your reverie. 

"I'm here, I went to get water, you want some?" you asked handing him a second glass. 

"You are wearing my old clothes." he said taking a sip.

"Do you want them back?" you asked raising an eyebrow.

"You wear them better." he replied smiling charmingly. 

"Today is a full moon, maybe that's why I can't sleep." you said looking at the open window from which you could see the moon. "The moon looks beautiful." 

"Sweetheart, every time I see your face, the moon should be jealous." 

"Charming as always." You laughed quietly and sat next to him on the bed. "I'm gonna miss you so much." you whispered while placing your hand on his cheek. "So fucking much." 

"I will miss you too." he took a deep breath, closing his eyes. "Don't forget me please."

"I will never forget you Eddie Munson. How can I forget someone I gave my heart to?"

"I love you. You and only you. Remember about it, always, no matter what happens..." he grabbed your hand and placed it on his chest. You felt a gentle, rhythmic beating under your palm. "...It beats only for you. No one else. Only for you." 

Was that possible? Despite the fact that somewhere out there in the world there were millions of beautiful fans waiting for him, ready to do a lot to be at his side, could his heart still remain yours? 

"I know what you're thinking about baby." he took your chin and directed you so that you were looking straight into his eyes. "This will only be a temporary break, we'll both get a little fun, I'm sure you'll make more than one surfer or nerd's head spin." he laughed.

"Eddie!" you playfully jabbed him in the arm.

"What? Have fun babe, because sooner or later you're going to have to break all their hearts when we find each other again, because your heart belongs to me and mine belongs to you. This is not a forever goodbye baby. Only temporary." You wanted to be as sure of all this as he was. You also struggled to hold back the urge to give up your college just to fly with him to New York, but that wasn't a good idea. Your presence in this adventure would only be a limitation. "Besides, I won't let you forget about me, I'll call you every hour just to tell you that I'm losing my mind without you." He pulled you closer by smacking you on the lips. "You are the love of my life, nothing will change that. After I finish my first tour, the first thing I'll do is buy Wayne the little house he's always dreamed of." he chuckled. "And when the second one is over, I will immediately get on a plane and fly straight to California, buy a ring with the most beautiful diamond in the world and put it on your finger, of course, if you agree." He kissed you on the forehead. His dreams were beautiful, you were glad that you were still a part of them however you couldn't stop the thought that this vision was too beautiful to be true. 

"I have something for you..." you said with difficulty holding back tears. "I wanted to give it to you tomorrow at the airport, but..." You went to the drawer from which you took out a small box. Returning to your seat you sat down opposite him and handed it to him. Inside there was a new necklace waiting for him with a guitar pick that had your initials on it, one side was his and the other was yours. 

"Baby..." he whispered, only then did you notice that tears were also gathering in his eyes. 

"Before you put on..." you took off the ring you received from your parents for your eighteenth birthday from your hand. It was one of your favorites, it looked like the usual, a simple silver circle but sentimental significance was huge. You took the chain and gently slipped the ring over it. 

"But it's your favorite, you can't-." he said still looking at the gift. 

"I want you to have it, plus you said you would give me a new one in a while, so..." you smiled slightly. 

"Does that mean you say yes?" he grinned.

"Of course I do silly. How could I not?" 

"Help me put it on." he said turning his back to you. 

"Even if the only thing that keep us apart is seven thousand miles, I want you to remember that your home is in my heart." you said looking at the necklace as he turned to face you. 

"Come here." He grabbed you by the wrist and pulled you close so that you were now sitting on top of him with your arms around his neck. "I love you. I love you to the point of madness." he said kissing you. The kiss was needy. The clothes you were wearing were on the floor again, both of you in need of intimacy. 

His hot lips placed kisses along your neck going to your breasts, his hands wandered over your body wanting to remember every little detail. 

"I love you Eddie." You moaned right in his ear. 

"And I love you. Only you. You and olny you, my sweet angel." he replied embracing you tightly around the waist and tipping you over so that you were now under him. 

"Baby, please." you said looking straight into his eyes. "I need you as close to me as possible." 

"Me too, sweet girl." He leaned in to kiss you, and after a moment he filled you with all of himself. "You are so perfect for me, mine, only mine." he said feeling you wrap your legs around him. 

"Only yours." you repeated.

That night you made love like there was no tomorrow. You couldn't count all the declarations of love that came out of your mouths. With desperation you wanted to be as close as possible to each other as if you wanted to stockpile feelings of closeness for the time of separation which was approaching mercilessly fast. Every I love you from his lips you wanted to lock in a jar and keep for all the coming nights filled with emptiness and longing. Eddie felt the same way, despite his joy and excitement that his dreams were about to come true he too couldn't hold back the tears when outside the window you witnessed the dark night slowly turning into soft shades of orange and the first rays of sunshine already greeting you over Hawkins. Holding each other in your arms, you both wanted to stop time, if only for a moment to enjoy each other even longer. Unfortunately, the world was rushing unmercifully forward without bothering about the pain in your hearts accompanying one of the most beautiful sunrises. 

The rest of the morning passed you by like a fog, you barely remembered the way to the airport, the only thing you remembered was that you both sat with Eddie in the back seats constantly clingling to each other. Also at the airport you sat on his lap cuddled up to him. You didn't care about other people's stares. Gareth, Jeff, Simon, Uncle Wayne and Robin knew what was going on and understood perfectly your need for closeness. The separation of people who had the purest kind of love for each other like the two of you made it hard for them too. They looked at you with sadness and helplessness, because they knew that nothing would be able to help. When it came time to board the plane Eddie stood still, paralyzed with fear. 

"I don't have to fly." he said, turning to face you. "I don't want to go without you." his voice was breaking. "It's too hard. Ah, fuck." He wiped his tears with his hand. 

"Baby, you have to go." with all your strength you restrained yourself from bursting out crying. You had to be strong for him. "This is your dream, you have to try." you placed your hands on his cheeks.

"But you..." his breathing became more and more uneven.

"You know where to find me. I'll be waiting, I'll be your number one fan and I'll be waiting for you, always." you forced yourself to smile. "I'm damn proud of you, Eddie." 

"I love you." he leaned his forehead against yours. 

"And I love you too." you replied, kissing the tip of his nose. "Now go, go give them hell, rockstar." Laying one last kiss on his lips, you saw Gareth pat him on the shoulder, saying they had to go to the plane now. Through a blurry vision you watched him disappear into the huge line of people, and it wasn't until you saw the plane take to the air that you let all the emotions come out of you. All the way back you were crying your eyes out, Robin and Uncle Wayne, who was driving tried to comfort you from time to time, but they knew that no words could erase the pain that was gripping you.

Eddie's life turned a hundred and eighty degrees, constant concerts, parties "sex, drugs and rock and roll" style quickly took over his life, letting himself get carried away, but he was doing it within reason, he saw with his own eyes how drugs destroyed his father's life when addiction became the most important thing in his life, so he limited himself to weed, which was enough. He would lie that he didn't like the idea of groupies who were actually begging him to do what he wanted with them. The enchantment, though, quickly passed. No matter how crazy sex he had, no matter how good the alcohol he drank and enjoyed parties with the biggest stars, he still didn't feel fully happy. That's why, no matter how tired he was after more concerts and parties, he always found time to call the other end of the country at least once a day to hear your voice. The time zone was not an obstacle, he knew that he could call in the middle of the night and you would still pick up and enjoy listening to all sorts of stories and his ramblings about all the new song ideas, assuring you, of course, that the love-themed ones were about you. He didn't tell you everything, of course; you both agreed that it would be better for him to keep his adventures with groupies to himself, and you about the guys and their tanned bodies you had to deal with in California. They didn't matter to you. You both knew that no matter how much fun you had with others your hearts were on the other side of the country which still hurt. 

You, Eddie, Robin, Steve and the kids were not the only people the government had to compensate for all the trauma. Chrissy, who almost became a victim of Vecna also got her chance in New York as a spermodel. Unfortunately, the fashion world could be cruel, and the agency that looked after her decided that the best way to promote her would be to arrange a relationship with a fifteen-year older, sleazy fashion designer. Terrified by the idea, she went to the only place where she could feel safe.  Eddie had just finished talking to you when he heard a knock on the door. He looked in surprise at the girl standing there. 

"Eddie, I need your help." She said entering the apartment with panic in her eyes. Explaining the whole situation and revealing her secrets to him, she also presented the idea she had come up with. Eddie being already a bit tired of the groupies who didn't give him a break said it would be a good idea and an excuse to reject them. 

"So when do we start?" he asked looking at Chrissy who was sitting across from him. 

"As soon as possible." she replied. 

The only thing he hadn't thought through was your reaction, because as soon as Chrissy's plan saw the daylight you stopped answering your phone calls, always answered by a deafening silence. He even started writing letters, but never got a response. He was not stupid. He knew what was going on and why you were ignoring him. With pain, he had to admit that you had the right to do so. As time passed, he began to regret everything he had agreed to, however, it was too late to give up. He also knew that if he didn't agree, Chrissy would already be stuck in a bubble of unhappiness until the very end.

taglist: @i-me-mine @phantypurple

[hecalledme-jagi]

hi! i'm so upset after picking up mystic messenger again so i wanted to ask if you could do a zen x MC hc, but they're both aware that they are in different dimensions and will never be together... but they see each other in their dreams!!

(Bruh I wrote this a yr ago and completely forgot about it. Sorry Anon ;;;)

Anon, you hurt me so T_T I love the angst, but why!? ＿|￣|○

I am a weak, weak, woman for Zen angst and now I must offer it to you and the rest of this fandom. I must break my heart for this man, AGAIN! For you, Anon, I will dive back into the depths of despair. On that note, I hope you enjoy, or feel sad(??).

Sorry for the delay, but fitting that I write Zen angst on my 6th MysMe Anniversary LOL

Zen and MC in Different Dimensions

- Zen could feel when you missed him. It’s a warm yet heartbreaking feeling that rests in his chest and stings in his eyes.

- You could feel Zen’s thoughts of you. They’re constant and lovely but left you melancholic and lonely.

- He knew when you were thinking of him or talking about him because suddenly everything appeared so much brighter.

- You knew when he longed for you because bright and unhindered smiles always seemed to paint your face.

- Sometimes he swore he could hear your voice and your beautiful laughter when he was going about his day.

- Sometimes his laughter was all you could hear and all you wanted to hear.

- Zen often wondered if you got the same feelings he did. Did your heart feel unbearably warm when he missed you? Did your world light up when he talked about you or thought of you? Did you hear his laughter and his voice throughout the day?

- The answer was yes, a thousand times over, with every ounce of love, joy, and sadness.

- And sadly, he would never know, but he knew one thing for sure, sharing dreams was something you both looked forward to.

- Knowing you could only reach each other in your dreams, made sleep the most treasured thing either of you could ask for.

- In those dreams, he could hold you and offer you the affections he couldn’t in the waking hours of the day. He’s created vast and beautiful worlds in those dreams, hoping each one would make your waking hours a little more bearable.

- He made sure that those dreams encouraged you to live in reality bc that’s where you truly belonged, but deep down he wished that sleep would never end and he could stay with you.

- On the hardest days, when his feelings of loneliness became more than he could take, when his insecurities raged and roared at him, when life got too difficult to bear; all he wanted was to sleep and be where you are.

- To feel your warmth and comfort, support and love.

- He wanted, so desperately, to bridge those distant dimensions for as long as possible, even if it became unhealthy.

- But what good would that do? He would only be dragging you down with him, and he could never do that to you.

- Furthermore, he knew, better than anyone else, that you would want him to continue living and perusing his dreams, the same way he wanted that for you.

- So, sleeping until you wake, would be enough.

- Holding you until morning came.

- Kissing you until daybreak.

- Sweet nothings until sunrise.

- Laughter until first light.

- Loving you, and you loving him, without limit or requisite.

- He would take his fill, searing ever inch of you into his memory. Filling his cup until it overflowed with you, hoping it would bleed into the day that followed. Hoping it would make up for the lack of you in his world.

- Hoping maybe one day that the yearning you shared would somehow turn the two dimensions into one, where he could finally have your scent cling to his clothes and melt into his skin. Where he could have you part of his life, morning, noon, and night. Where sleep wasn’t the only place he could find you. Where loving you beyond a screen and short lived dreams was no longer a wish, but rather something mixed with normalcy.

˚✧₊⁎𝒥𝑎𝑔𝑖𝑎⁎⁺˳✧༚

I do not own any characters, all ownership goes to Cheritz. Thanks for reading!

[soulcialdent]

Day 4: يقبرني Ya'aburnee (Arabic)

A way to declare your hope that your loved one will outlive you, as it would be unbearable to Live without them.

(Continuation from Day 1: Saudade Entry)

That night after sending the paper plane Neji dreamed about her. There was few different scenes that flashed behind his eyes but there was one he remembered vividly. Probably because it was something that really happened. 

It was the day of the infamous Konohagakure Middle School Brawl. Tenten was known around town for being a hardass. Well, not really a hard ass but she liked to fight. After being bullied for years for being an outsider. She got fed up and slapped the shit out of one of her bullies.  From about 4th grade and on, this made her target. She ended up fighting all the time.

Her parents enrolled her into martial arts classes to help mitigate some of her anger. That’s where she and Neji meet. The winter between junior and senior year of elementary school. They became fast friends eventually attending middle school together. 

Fast forward to the third year in middle school. She had calmed down a bit and it helped that Neji and Lee were there to reign her in and keep her out of trouble-most of the time. Which was a tall task because a lot of people just didn't like her. 

On this day in particular. It just so happened to be a school festival day.  It was packed and raining on and off the entire time. Neji was in the student council office retrieving some supplies.  The door bursts open. 

“Neji Ni-san, it's Tenten. Lee needs to come right now. There out back by the tennis courts “ 

Neji dropped what he was doing. He brushed passed hinata and started running down the hall to head outside as fast as his feet would carry him. When finally did make it out back. The crowd was so thick that he knew he was gonna have a hard time getting thru. But moved as swiftly as he could. 

That's when he saw them. Lee held on to both her hands trying to keep her attention. Naruto stood right next to body blocking her.  Neji ran over to them out of breath. 

“Tenten, are you okay? What's going on” he checked to see if she was injured. 

“I'm fine. I just need to go talk to someone for a second. Lee won't let me go”

Neji was confused. 

“I'm pretty sure she didn't mention it but we've been having some issues with some of Technical Middle School kids. We found them beating up and robbing some freshmen. Turned out they were low level Anbu gang members.  They’ve been taunting us all day”  said Naruto 

“Okay then, let me take you home”  she looked at Lee  “Lee, can you let Iruka Sensei know that i’m taking Tenten home. If he asks, she's not feeling well. 

“Here, take my bike. It’ll be faster” Naruto tossed, his keys into Neji. “It's blue and orange with a frog lock. “Yelled the blonde as he and Lee rushed off to go find Iruka Sensei.

“Come on Tenten” Neji grab her hand and begin pulling her through the crowd. “Were you planning on telling me any of this”

“No, I didn't want you worrying about me” 

“I'm always worry about you. Especially when I’m not around. You do reckless things” 

Tenten scuffed 

“I’m sorry to disappoint you then if that's the case. But what was I supposed to do? Let the those kids get stomped out”

She had a point

“You did the right thing. But what's been happening today?” 

“They been trying to lure me into fighting all day. I'm not sure, how many members are here. But their leader Temari is definitely here. Her second in command I think, his name is Kankuro. He rolled up on me earlier. But Lee scared him off. 

“So what’s your plan?  Did you plan to fight them all by yourself”

“Yeah, if that's how it's gotta be then that's how it's gotta be”

Neji remembers how much that reveal hurt him.

“This is a suicide mission. Are you trying to die?” 

Tenten halted, standing her ground. But I didn't answer him.  And when she didn't answer he continued.

“I don't want you to die”

Tenten flinched, and fear flashed through her eyes and Neji let go. She took a deep breath and stood really tall. 

“Of course not. I just don't want to be scared anymore” 

He hadn't expecting those words out of her mouth. Tenten always seemed so fearless. She was the swing and ask questions later type. That's why Neji had vowed to always protect her.  He really didn't know who he was without her. 

“How does putting your life in danger fix that? I am seriously trying to understand” 

She pondered his words while looking around. 

“I'm not sure it does. If I give them what they want. They'll go away.  I can take solace in knowing that I'm not a coward” 

Tenten was one of the bravest and kindness people he knew. She was a lot of things but a coward, never.

“I understand but I'm still taking you home. We’ll come up with a better solution. "Neji reaches out, to grab her hand again so they continue moving.

But a loud scream echoed behind them. They both swiftly turned around. Somebody had punched Naruto in the back of his head. Two other people started running at him.

Neji went to grab her but missed. Tenten ran across the school yard and kicked one of the attackers right in their back. 

Neji found himself running right behind her and grabbing the second attacker by his shirt and judo flipping him. 

Tenten helped Naruto up and a group of guys and girls with bats, chains and started running at them.  All hell broke was about the brakes loose. The rain started picking up, making visibility almost impossible. 

Neji was sure that were going to die that day.  Neji made peace with it because at the very least they were together. He wants it any other way. Through some what Neji couldn't only assume was divine intervention, they all survived. 

 Lee’s broke one of his legs. Naruto broke his hand and a few broken ribs. Tenten tore her.  A Achilles tendon and few broken ribs. Loving her had brought really hard lessons and Neji the scars to prove it.  But he wouldn't have had it any other way. 

Ya'aburnee

[zegrvshvghes]

Missing your love- AF19

God i love Adam so much, also bully me please. Tell me everything wrong with this i want feedback. I love this stupid little canadian.

check out my masterlist for more 💌

Adam fell madly in love with you. You two met when you were both in college and hit it off right away. You spent all your time together, laughing and exploring the city. Adam knew that he had found the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.

However, as time went on, things started to change. You became more focused on your career and less focused on your relationship. You would cancel plans last minute and seemed distant whenever you were together. Adam tried to talk to you about it, but you always brushed him off.

Weeks turned into months, Adam realized that he was falling out of love with you. He couldn't bear to be with someone who didn't prioritize the relationship. He felt like he was constantly making an effort while you were taking him for granted.

"I feel like we're not growing anymore. We haven't gotten any closer in the past few months, and it feels like we're just going through the motions."

You wiped your tears away and sat back on the couch. "I didn't know you felt this way," you said quietly.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to hurt you," Adam said. "I just don't think this is working anymore."

You sat there, thinking, for a long time. Finally, you looked up at Adam with a sad but determined look on your face. "I don't want to hold you back from happiness," you said. "I love you enough to let you go if that's what you need."

Adam breathed a sigh of relief. He had feared that you would be angry or defensive, but your understanding and willingness to let him go made him feel like he was making the right decision. "I love you too, I Always will," he said.

"It hurts, but I know we'll both be okay in the long run," You said, standing up from the couch. "I should go so we can both have some space to think."

Adam watched you leave, feeling guilty and sad but also a sense of freedom. He knew that he had made the right choice, even though it hurt.

It was a difficult decision, but Adam knew he had to end things with you. The thought of being with someone who he believed didn't love him back was unbearable. However, Adam knew deep down that he couldn't continue to put in all the effort without getting anything in return.

The breakup was tough on both of you, but he knew it was the right decision. He needed to find someone who would love him as much as he loved them, and who would prioritize their relationship just as much as he did.

He felt himself moving on. He started going out more, spent time on his hobbies, and even started dating a little bit. He felt like himself again, but he also knew that he would never forget you and the love you had once shared.

Weeks turned into months, and Adam eventually found someone who loved him just as fiercely as he loved them. Looking back on his relationship with you, he realized that falling out of love had been a necessary step towards finding true happiness.

He realized that he deserved someone who would love him and care for him, and he was able to find that person in the end. It just goes to show that everything happens for a reason, even when it hurts at the time.

Months later, Adam ran into you at your favourite coffee shop. You exchanged awkward hellos and caught up on how your lives had been over the time you had been apart.

"I think we needed this break," You said. "I've learned so much about myself and what I want in life."

Adam smiled at you, feeling a renewed sense of appreciation for the person you were. "Me too," he said.

You talked for a little while longer, and then it was time to say goodbye. This time, there were no tears or anger, just a sense of closure and understanding.

As Adam walked away, he felt grateful for the time he had spent with you and the lessons he had learned. Falling out of love had been hard, but it had been worth it to find himself and what he truly wanted in life.

[ravendruid]

Be In My Eyes - Chapter 22

You can read the previous chapters here or on AO3. I'm so sorry it took me over a month to update. I got extremely busy and overwhelmed in September. I'm not sure when the next chapter will be posted because I have a few projects that I'm working on at the moment. But keep an eye open for updates. Cozy up, it's loooooong. Summary: Keyleth's date with Kashaw ends abruptly when a mysterious woman calls him. Luckily for Keyleth, an unexpected savior comes to her rescue from the torrential rain.

The cold and slightly damp autumn wind blew against Keyleth’s face and slithered down the lapel of her jacket and inside her turtleneck, making her shiver. She assumed her father’s jacket was warm enough to handle Emon’s fall weather since it did wonders for her back home, but something about the crisp air of the city made her rethink her options. If this is what it felt like, only one month into fall, the months leading up to winter were about to become unbearable soon. There was something about the ocean breeze that seeped deeper into her bones than the mountain cold. Maybe it was because Zephrah was conveniently tucked between two large mountain ranges, protected from the stronger winds and chill, while Emon’s arms were wide open to receive the sea-salted air. 

Thankfully for Keyleth, the dark green awning of the coffee shop became visible just as she turned a corner. The sight of it and the promise of a warm coffee made her smile and quicken her step as she wrapped her brown jacket further around herself. This was not her usual locally owned coffee shop, the one she spent hours in, studying with Percy and the girls, but a franchise chain that Keyleth didn’t care much about. Due to Keyleth’s town being isolated, big franchises like this coffee company didn’t usually bother to open up shop. Because of that, she grew fond of locally and family-owned businesses and preferred those to the big corporations whose wages were barely enough for their employees to survive. The interior was sleek and modern, in wood and glossy black tones, with some green accents that people learned to associate with the brand. 

Keyleth cringed at the loud noise of people chatting, the machines steaming and pouring drinks, and just at the overall racket of the environment. Her stomach dipped as she looked around, seeking Kashaw among the crowd. She finally spotted him at a table not far from the large window that overlooked the main street, hunched over a paper cup of coffee and his phone. Keyleth sighed and took a tentative step toward the wooden countertop, where a female employee with shock-blue hair and the look of someone who was dead inside greeted her with a very fake smile and cheerful voice. Keyleth stumbled a little on her words, halfway looking at the immense chalk-like menu behind the counter as she perused her options. The woman at the counter stared at her, never breaking that annoying fake smile, but her nails tapped impatiently on the counter, making Keyleth’s anxiety worse. When she finally realized they didn’t have any of her favorite drinks, she merely asked for a regular latte. Keyleth didn’t have to wait long for the drink. She had barely finished paying for it when her name was called, and the same white and green paper cup as Kashaw’s was placed on the counter next to the register. She picked it up, glancing a smile at the barista who, by now, was already scrambling to prepare the next order. Keyleth shrugged and walked to the table where Kash was still buried in his phone. She cleared her throat as she got within hearing distance, and only then did the man look up to greet her.

“Hey,” Kashaw said, setting his phone down on the table and smiling at Keyleth.

“Sorry I’m late,” Keyleth wasn’t late. She had arrived five minutes before the scheduled time, but she still felt like apologizing for making him wait. 

“No worries,” Kash waved his hand. “Take a seat.”

Keyleth nodded, set her cup on the table, and peeled off her jacket, draping it over her lap as she sat on the wooden chair on the other side of Kash, who was now sipping on his coffee. From the way his head tilted back, Keyleth figured his coffee cup was practically empty. She asked if he had been waiting for long, but Kash shook his head at her. Yet she didn’t feel relieved. Keyleth finally brought the plastic lid of her cup to her lips, tasting her coffee. It was too sweet, and she quickly regretted not asking for plain black coffee. 

“Not up to your liking?” Kash chuckled. He must have seen the look of offense on her face as she set down the cup. 

“It’s fine,” She lied. Why was she lying? It’s not like Kash made the coffee himself. 

Keyleth started rotating her cup in her hands, head bowed in silence as she analyzed her nails. It had been a while since she had them done. Maybe she should treat herself to a manicure to celebrate the end of the midterms. Perhaps Vex and Pike would like to join her and make it a girls’ day thing, although she had a feeling if they extended the invitation to the boys, they wouldn’t say no—perhaps Grog would—since they all seemed to take good care about their appearance. The awkward silence that settled between Keyleth and Kash was interrupted by a low snort as Keyleth pictured Grog at a nail salon, his large frame trying to fit into the small lounge chairs as he got his feet and hands taken care of. On second thought, maybe Grog would also like the pampering. He has lived with Pike since they were children, after all. She has got to have done some makeovers on him growing up.

“What’s so funny?” Kash finally asked with a cocked smile. 

“Oh? Nothing,” Keyleth offered, sipping on her coffee. “Did you get rain on the way here?” She saw the still-damp umbrella hanging from the back of Kash’s chair. 

“Uhm? Yeah, I did,” He answered, peering over his shoulder and back at her. 

“It seems like I got lucky then. I only realized I’d forgotten my umbrella by the time I was in the elevator. Thankfully, it stopped raining when I got to the atrium, so I was able to get here without getting drenched.”

Kash hummed in response with a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. They looked at each other for a while, not knowing what to ask until Keyleth finally settled on starting with the basics.

“So, what do you do? Do you only work for Gilmore as a barman?”

“No. I’m in community college studying business management. Gilmore’s is just a part-time job to pay for tuition. I also work at a tattoo shop, but the money wasn’t enough,” Kash explained. 

Keyleth sipped her coffee again and said, “That sounds cool.”

“It’s okay. It’s whatever. It’s actually pretty boring sometimes.”

The conversation moved on from school without Kash asking Keyleth what she was studying. In fact, he didn’t ask her many questions at all. Keyleth led the conversation, asking him about what he liked to do in his free time, to which Kash told her he loved playing soccer.

“Do you play regularly?” Keyleth asked. She wasn’t really interested in sports, but she was trying to be nice, and asking Kash about what he was passionate about seemed like a nice thing to do.

“No. I wanted to try out for the college team, but their schedule conflicted with my classes and work.” He answered with a shrug. 

Keyleth nodded and took another sip of her latte, which did not get better the more she drank. She figured she could change the subject when Kash didn’t develop further, this time picking questions about his likes. Kashaw told Keyleth about being a huge music fan and how he had been playing guitar since he was younger, going as far as having a band in high school. Keyleth thought she finally found common ground with the man, deciding to ask him further questions about his musical interests and about his band, which he had no problem answering. However, much to her disappointment, Kash didn’t seem to care enough to ask her about her music interests, or even if she heard of the bands he mentioned (which she did, one of them was actually her favorite, but he wouldn’t know that because he didn’t ask and didn’t let her speak). 

The conversation flowed decently from thereon, with Kash talking the entire time. Keyleth felt her anxiety and insecurity grow with every sip of her coffee, which didn’t take long for her to finish, thanks to Kash not allowing her to say anything other than a couple of questions related to whatever he had been talking about at the moment, and not asking Keyleth any questions about herself. An hour later, when Keyleth’s eyes were glazed on the empty cup she kept rotating in her hands, Kash’s phone started vibrating on the table, interrupting his monologue about the time he and his friends decided to explore an abandoned house that other people claimed was haunted. On the screen was a picture of a woman with vibrant red and white hair and a menacing look. Keyleth didn’t have time to see the name before Kash picked up the phone and answered the call, but her curiosity had been peaked by whoever this mystery woman was who made Kash forget all manners.

“Hey Z. What’s up?” Kash answered, not paying Keyleth any mind. She squirmed on her chair and looked around. A couple was chatting and holding hands across their table not far from the window. Keyleth felt some jealousy in seeing them. One of the women was leaning with her elbow on the table, watching and hearing her partner talk with so much attention and care. It must be nice to have someone who wants to hear everything about one’s day or what they have to say. Keyleth spared a glance at Kashaw, whose phone was glued to his ear. From it, she could hear a woman’s voice, although she couldn’t discern what she was saying.

“I was just grabbing coffee. I’ll be there soon, Z,” Kash told the woman on the line. Keyleth’s stomach turned as she realized he hadn’t mentioned her or that he was on a date. Did he not consider this a date, then? Had Keyleth been putting the cart ahead of the oxen?

After another moment of silence where Keyleth focused her eyes on her hands to avoid looking at Kash, he ended the conversation with, “Okay, I’ll get you coffee. I’ll see you soon.” Keyleth finally lifted her gaze to him, offering a timid smile that Kash didn’t see because he was still staring at his phone, texting someone. After sending whatever message was more important than acknowledging Keyleth’s presence, he finally lifted his gaze with a slight look of surprise as if he had forgotten all about Keyleth.

“I’m sorry, I have to go,” He said, getting up from his chair and grabbing his umbrella. Before Keyleth could open her mouth to answer, he continued, “It was nice hanging out with you, Keyleth. Text me if you want to hang out again!” Kash didn’t wait for a reply. He strolled quickly to the counter to order a coffee before Keyleth had time to process, and by the time she finally replied, “Likewise,” Kash was already out the door.

Keyleth stared at her empty cup. The annoyance it had brought her earlier was now completely forgotten in the back of her mind. In fact, her mind felt empty, and her senses unfocused. The noise of chatter and espresso machines was suddenly gone, as were the people who occupied the tables around her. Keyleth stared at the emptiness, hands still on her lap, not thinking about anything. It was not a good silence. It was a silence she tried to escape. A silence that preceded a panic attack. Only when a clap of thunder roared outside did Keyleth realize she had been staring ahead. The cacophony of sounds rushed back so hard that she felt an overwhelming need to run away somewhere quiet and isolated. But, as Keyleth turned her head out the window, she saw the pouring rain outside and knew she was utterly screwed without an umbrella. 

“Fuck,” Keyleth swore between her teeth. She grabbed her phone, willing her hands to stop shaking, and opened the apartment’s group chat. She wrote something, then deleted it and typed again. She couldn’t find the right words. What was she supposed to say? ‘My date left me hanging in a really loud coffee shop, and I don’t have an umbrella to return home. Please, someone, come save me before I start panicking’? No. They would surely make fun of her—especially Scanlan, who had teased her endlessly the previous night at the bar once he found Kash flirting with Keyleth. She deleted what she typed and wrote instead, ‘I forgot my umbrella, and it’s raining. Can anyone bring me one? I’ll buy you a coffee”.

Keyleth barely had time to lock her phone when she received a text from Vax asking her where she was. Once she recovered from the initial shock, she texted him her location, to which Vax replied, “I’ll be there in five minutes. No coffee needed”. Keyleth’s shock still locked her on the chair as she stared at the message for longer than she intended. Although Vax had claimed he didn’t need a coffee, Keyleth paid him no mind and ordered a black coffee as payment for him and waited for Vax outside, underneath the green awning. 

Vax kept true to his word—as Keyleth knew he would—showing up five minutes after sending the text and not a minute later. Although Keyleth was expecting him, she was still taken aback by the sight of her slender friend—or roommate?—approaching her in a hurried step, with his hair up in a ponytail and wearing a very different attire than what she had seen him earlier. In fact, Keyleth was so stunned that she didn’t hear Vax say hi to her because all she could pay attention to was his lilac button-up shirt and a vibrant purple umbrella with golden dots. 

“Keyleth, hello?” Vax was still standing under the umbrella, just out of reach of the awning where she had been waiting for him. Only when Vax waved right in front of Keyleth’s eyes did she realize she hadn’t said anything. 

“I didn’t know you owned colored clothes,” She blabbered. Oh no. That’s not—I didn’t even say hi. Keyleth’s cheeks reddened once she noticed. However, from the chuckle Vax let out, he didn’t seem to mind. 

“It’s Gilmore’s. He lent it to me,” He answered. 

Oh. Gilmore’s, Keyleth thought. “Oh, that’s—okay,” She said.

“I heard you needed a way home.” Vax cocked his head in amusement.

“Yeah, I forgot my umbrella,” Keyleth replied bashfully. 

Vax’s gaze moved down from Keyleth’s face to her free hand, where she was indeed missing an umbrella. He then saw the coffee on her other hand, and the corners of his mouth curled upwards. When he returned his attention back to her face, he did so very slowly, looking at Keyleth, wrapped around the jacket that was at least one size too large on her, the soft make-up she had done, and the braid that fell past her shoulder landing with a dark red elastic above her breast pocket. Keyleth swallowed hard at his piercing gaze, feeling a familiar pull in her navel. It had been a while since Vax had looked at her—actually looked—and she realized she missed it. He never made her feel uncomfortable when he did it and never felt disrespectful towards her, unlike other men. Maybe that was why Keyleth’s cheeks grew even warmer as Vax’s lips curled up, almost in approval at what he saw. 

“I–I got you a coffee, like I promised.” Keyleth finally handed him the warm cup. Vax shook his head, saying, “I told you you didn’t have to,” but he still took it from her and sipped it carefully. 

“Sorry if it’s not that good. They—” Keyleth looked above her shoulder to the interior of the shop and then back at Vax with a grimace, “—don’t have a huge selection of coffees for such a famous franchise.”

“Yeah, I prefer the coffee shop on campus.” Keyleth nodded, agreeing with him. “Shall we, my lady?” Vax offered his arm. Keyleth took it, wrapping her arm around his, and stepped under his umbrella. He positioned it so she was fully covered, even if that meant he was slightly exposed. As they started walking home, Keyleth couldn’t help but wonder what this date would have been like if it had happened with Vax. He would have waited for her, ordered his coffee with her, and asked her so many questions about herself. Vax always took an interest in her and what she was interested in. He was always patient and showed curiosity in her opinions. And not to mention, Vax drank every word Keyleth said as if he needed it like water to survive. Vax would have probably pulled her chair or opened the door for Keyleth and wouldn’t have ever left her in the middle of the date to bring another woman coffee. No. Especially that.

Keyleth was so buried in her own thoughts she didn’t realize the awkward silence that had settled, only disturbed by the thick rain pattering on the umbrella, until Vax spoke to her in an uncertain but curious tone, “How was your date?” 

Keyleth opened her mouth to answer but realized she had never told him she was going on a date. In fact, her exact words were, ‘I’m going to meet a friend for coffee.’ So, how did he know about it? A bulb lit up in her head. Vex had told her brother, of course.

“I think it was okay,” Keyleth finally said.

“You think?” Vax looked at Keyleth over the rim of the plastic lid of his cup, confused. 

Keyleth shrugged and replied, “Yeah. I have never been on a date before. I don’t have any terms of comparison.”

“I wouldn’t either. I’ve never been on a date.”

“Are you kidding?” Keyleth asked, stopping on the sidewalk and pulling Vax’s arm with her. 

Vax shrugged and offered a sympathetic smile. “Is it that shocking?” He asked. Of course, it was. He had to know that, right? 

“A little,” Keyleth replied bashfully.

“Why?”

Keyleth blushed and looked for somewhere to hide, but they were still stopped in the middle of the sidewalk. 

“I—” She stammered. Someone walked past Vax and her, giving them an annoyed side-eye, to which Vax replied with a scowl. However, the message was clear, so he moved Keyleth to the side, under a balcony. It took Keyleth all the courage she had to say it, and when she finally spoke, she didn’t dare look at Vax, opting to stare at their shoes, “You’re good-looking. I would assume you’ve been on tons of dates.”

Vax’ildan choked, and his spine stiffened. Keyleth felt it from how his arm tensed around hers. She finally dared to peek at him and saw a timid smile on a very, very scarlet face. When his eyes found Keyleth’s, she swallowed hard. He had pushed her against the cream-colored wall of the apartment building when he had moved them and was standing close enough to where they were both fully covered by the umbrella. His coffee cup was inches from Keyleth’s hand around his arm, warming her cold fingers. She could practically hear his heart beating fast in his chest and wondered if he, too, could listen to hers.

“T–thank you, Kiki,” He said bashfully. 

Kiki. Her eyes widened at the term of affection. She hadn’t heard it in so long. Keyleth missed hearing Vax call her by the nickname. She forgot how he said it with such sweetness and love. Love. 

“So, how come you’ve never been on a date?” She found the courage inside her to take her eyes away from his just so the flame that had lit up within her would ease. 

“I’ve never been in a serious relationship before,” Vax explained. Keyleth cocked her head, daring to look at him again—a mistake. That was a mistake. She quickly averted her gaze before her legs gave out on her. “I’ve had hook-ups and one-night stands with people but never a long-lasting relationship,” Vax finished with a shrug.

“I can’t blame you. Relationships are complicated,” Keyleth mumbled, now looking at Vax’s calloused hands holding the umbrella between them. His black nail polish was flaky and lacking in a lot of places. Keyleth wondered if he did his nails and make-up or if Vex’ahlia had a hand in it. She had never seen Vax without his signature eyeliner, so seeing him without it was weird. He must have been in a rush to go get her. But he mentioned his shirt was from Gilmore, so maybe he had gone to the barman after their meeting by the elevator that morning. ‘I’ve had hook-ups and one-night stands,’ the words echoed in Keyleth’s mind. She couldn’t help but wonder if Gilmore had been one of those hook-ups or one-night stands.

“Yeah, they can be,” Vax agreed with her.

“One day you think you’ve found someone you trust, and that might be ‘the one’—” Keyleth looked up at Vax, rolling her eyes at the expression, “—but then something happens, and they are gone.”

Vax gave Keyleth an apologetic smile, lowered the hand holding his coffee to brush his fingers against hers, and said softly, “Keyleth, all relationships have highs and lows, regardless if romantic or platonic. There are moments of suffering and fighting, but if it is a strong relationship and a relationship that is meant to be, then it’ll work out.”

“Sometimes things that are out of your control happen, and you end up suffering. Like your partner dies, and you’re left with a five-year-old kid that you now have to raise on your own, not really knowing how,” Keyleth’s eyes filled with tears. She had never spoken about this feeling out loud to anyone, not even dared to dwell on it for too long. With one hand still around Vax’s arm and his fingers affectionately brushing her other hand, Keyleth allowed her tears to fall down her cheek as Vax gave her a look of recognition and compassion.

“I’m sure they loved each other very much,” Vax whispered, pulling in closer to Keyleth. He stopped brushing his fingers against her hand and shifted around to unwrap his arm from hers. Keyleth looked at him, confused for a moment, but then he wrapped both arms around her waist, pulling her closer so her head rested against his chest.

“They did, but I don’t remember it,” Keyleth’s voice was slightly muffled by Vax’s shirt. It felt warm and comfortable, and she missed being held like this—especially by him. Although his familiar scent still lingered on his hair and body, the smell of lavender and patchouli from his shirt overwhelmed her. Keyleth considered not pulling away for a moment, not while his arms surrounded her with such softness and his breath puffed against her temple. But she was starting to get a headache from the scent, so she straightened up, looking at Vax in the eyes. Even without eyeliner, they were still mesmerizing and sharp. Keyleth didn’t step away from him or remove his hands from her waist. That was his step to take since he had been the one to take the initiative to hold her. Instead, Keyleth stood there, watching him intently, and continued, “All I know are the tales my dad told me growing up. They’re not my memories, so sometimes they don’t feel real.”

“I know how you feel,” Vax let go of her but didn’t step back either. His eyes shone with fear as if he was scared he had overstepped his boundaries with Keyleth. “It was real, though. Was it not? Otherwise, you wouldn’t be here today. You wouldn’t have been born if your parents didn’t love each other.”

He was right. Keyleth knew that, but she still shrugged in silence. She looked above his shoulder, her eyes tracking the rain that fell just outside their cocoon of safety. Keyleth forgot how safe Vax made her feel. Even if they were in the middle of the street where anyone could hear their conversation, Vax made her feel like they were alone, in a bubble of silence. 

“I don’t know what a happy relationship is either. My parents never got married,”

Keyleth turned her eyes back to his and saw sadness mixed with anger. “Oh?”

“It’s a really long story,” Vax explained. Keyleth waited, but when he didn’t add on, she didn’t push any farther. She nodded and wrapped her arm with his again. 

“Let’s head back,” She whispered with a soft smile. Vax nodded and followed her. 

“Was the date that bad?” He asked a few minutes later.

Keyleth snorted and gave him a look as if to say, ‘You have no idea.’ With her attention focused on not tripping or stepping on a puddle, Keyleth finally told Vax all about the date with Kashaw: how he didn’t seem interested in her at all, how he only talked about himself, never asking questions about her. 

“He didn’t even say I looked good,” Keyleth all but groaned, moving her free hand to point at herself and gesturing it up and down her body. 

“What? That guy is an asshole,” Vax grunted. Keyleth felt anger radiate from his body.

“Yeah. He kind of is.”

“Are you going on another date with him?” Vax asked, avoiding looking at her by sipping on what was left of his coffee. Keyleth smiled at the blush on his cheeks.

“He told me to text him if I wanted to,” She narrowed her eyes in anticipation of Vax’s reaction. 

“Are you going to?” He asked, nervously biting his lower lip. Either Vax noticed she was looking at him and was ignoring her on purpose, or he was too embarrassed to acknowledge her because instead of looking at her, he threw back the rest of his drink. 

“Probably not.”

Keyleth felt it before he spoke, the slight flame of hope that lit up in him. She smiled, looking ahead at the approaching campus gates. “Do you think he will text you for another date?”

“I doubt it. It’s not like it was a romantic date or anything.”

Vax stopped in his tracks just under the metal archway that said University of Emon. Keyleth stopped and turned to him, surprised to see him smile. “It wasn’t?” He asked with a gleam in his eyes.

“Of course not, Vax. I barely know him. I just met him at the bar last night, and at first, I thought he was trying to be nice. I figured it wouldn’t hurt to know him better as a friend.”

“Oh,” Vax said before he turned back onto the paved road that led into the campus residential area. He swerved to one side of the path, dragging Keyleth with a soft yelp so he could throw away his empty cup into a trashcan. “Well, that’s—” He started but trailed off, not finishing the sentence. Keyleth chuckled and closed the distance between them, patting his hand affectionately on her arm. 

They didn’t speak for the rest of the short walk that took them to arrive at Greyskull Keep. However, just as Vax closed his umbrella and they walked through the atrium doors—welcomed by a warm wave from the central heating—he turned to Keyleth with a flirting look and said, “For what is worth it, I think you look really pretty, especially with those boots. They look amazing on you,” He winked. 

Keyleth blushed and mumbled a thank you. She wanted to bury herself in her jacket and not see his face or that darn look he was giving her. “They’re Vex’s.”

Vax cocked his head, not surprised because he probably could tell Keyleth didn’t own that kind of shoes, but in expectation of further explanation. Keyleth shrugged and said, “She told me not to wear my yellow sneakers. I don’t know what’s wrong with them.”

“There is absolutely nothing wrong with your yellow sneakers, Kiki,” Vax said, offended that his sister had expressed that to her. “I love them.”

Keyleth chuckled and bumped her shoulder against his. “Well, at least one of the twins has good taste,” She joked. Vax joined her laughter as they reached the elevators. Keyleth stopped before he did and looked at Vax, still laughing lightheartedly. It was a rare sound, without a doubt, one she had only heard enough times to count on one hand’s fingers. Because of that rarity, Keyleth absorbed every second of it, like a plant absorbs sunlight. 

“Do you want to know something funny?” Vax asked her once the elevator doors closed behind them. Keyleth nodded, leaning against a wall as Vax leaned against the opposite, their feet meeting in the middle, boot to boot. “I completely forgot I had set up with my sister to do Trinket’s monthly bath today, and you won’t believe who she asked to help her instead.”

“Who?”

Vax gave Keyleth a knowing look, wiggling his eyebrows before he spoke, “Percy.”

“No way,” She said, surprised. “He went to help Vex?” Vax nodded in response, and Keyleth snorted, “He totally has a crush on her.”

“Oh, yeah. I know that.” Vax said nonchalantly. 

“Wait, how do you know? Did he tell you?” Keyleth asked, pushing away from the wall and standing closer to Vax as the elevator approached their floor.

“Yep. Percy told me last night. We had a… heart-to-heart conversation about feelings,” Vax replied, stepping away as soon as the doors opened.

A ‘heart-to-heart conversation about feelings’? What does that even mean? Keyleth scowled at Vax’s back so intensively she forgot to exit the elevator. Thankfully for her, Vax noticed and pulled her out just before the doors closed, and she got taken to another floor.

“That motherfucker,” Keyleth cursed, taking her arm from Vax’s hand with a scowl that was not directed at him but at her other best friend. “He didn’t tell me he told you.”

Vax laughed and started heading out for their apartment door, but Keyleth grabbed his arm and dragged him onto the door that led to the stairwell. “Has he told Vex yet?” She asked him, closing the door behind her. They were so close to each other again that she could practically feel his body radiating heat.

“No, because he doesn’t think she feels the same way,” Vax lowered his head, but Keyleth couldn’t tell why.

“Vex totally has a crush on him.”

“Do you think so?” Vax looked at her, worried.

“She could have asked anyone. Why didn’t she ask Grog?” Keyleth arched an eyebrow.

“Maybe he was at the—” Vax started to say, but Keyleth interrupted him, “Please. Grog is the most logical person to help give Trinket a bath. Vex would have thought about him first if it truly was for help. Besides, Grog loves Trinket. I’m sure he would easily skip the gym to help Vex if she asked him. Have you seen how those two snuggle on the couch all the time?”

“I guess you’re right,” Vax mumbled. Keyleth noticed his cheeks were growing redder with each word that she spoke.

“She also invited Percy to study with her all the time this week. She’s totally smitten by him.” Keyleth smiled mischievously. Vax merely nodded, looking everywhere but at her. Keyleth tried to search his gaze, but he still avoided her until she asked what was wrong.

“Your hands are freezing.”

“What?” Keyleth looked down. She hadn’t noticed that she was still holding Vax’s hands from when she dragged him into the small area. Her cheeks flared up as red as his, and she took her hands away as if she had burned herself. “Shit, sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Vax whispered, looking at her from underneath his eyelashes. Keyleth gulped. “Kiki, I—”

“Thank you, Vax,” Keyleth stopped him. She had a feeling she knew what he was about to say, but she wasn’t ready to talk about it yet. “For coming to save me from the rain.”

“Of course,” Vax shook his head. “I wasn’t going to let you return home in the rain.”

Keyleth smiled and stepped away, opening the door and gesturing into the hallway. Vax nodded and followed her, making the short trek to their apartment door in silence. Only when he put the key in the lock did Keyleth speak, with a fake air of importance, “You’re my knight in shining armor, Vax’ildan.”

Vax chuckled and bowed slightly at her, waving a hand toward the dimly lit apartment, “You’re welcome Your Highness.”

Keyleth snorted and walked in, looking over her shoulder to say, “I’m not a princess.”

“Maybe not in this universe. Maybe you were one in an alternate universe,” Vax winked and closed the door behind him.

“Only if you were my personal guard. Sir Vax’ildan.” 

They both laughed as they went through the motions of getting rid of shoes, jacket, and umbrella. Keyleth held the brown coat draped over one arm, stretched the other above her head, and brought it down, only to rotate both shoulders, attempting to relieve any tension on her shoulders. 

“Where did you get that jacket?” Vax asked, nodding at it.

“I stole it from my dad.” When Vax laughed at the answer, Keyleth retorted, “What’s wrong with it? Don’t make me take back what I said earlier about at least one of the twins having good taste,” Keyleth scowled at him playfully. 

Vax raised his hands defensively, saying, “I was just thinking that maybe that’s what scared Kashaw.”

“Why? Is it that ugly?” Keyleth brought the brown jacket up to inspect it, but when she didn’t find anything unpleasant about it, she scowled at Vax again as if daring him to say so about her father’s jacket.

“No. It’s not. But it might have given off a vibe that it’s a boyfriend’s jacket. Maybe Kashaw thought you had a boyfriend.”

“He didn’t seem to care about it and didn’t ask, anyway.” Keyleth pouted. Something crossed Vax’s eyes. Something that made Keyleth take back her pout and turn her back to, walking him towards the hallway. He followed her, his piercing gaze almost digging a hole between her shoulder blades. Once they reached the door to her room, Vax leaned against its door jam and asked, “What are you going to do now?”

“Maybe stud—”

“Kiki,” He admonished her. Keyleth jumped slightly. Who would have known that the nickname he usually filled with love and care could also be firm and threatening? “We literally just finished exams. Give. Yourself. A. Break.” He punctuated each word with a step closer to her, ending up with his feet against hers and flicking Keyleth’s nose. She almost considered looking offended at him, but then she saw the glimmer and the crinkle of a smile in his eyes and lost it (and the only thing stopping her from pulling him into a kiss was her fast heartbeat and the focus she had to redirect from her brain to her legs to keep herself from falling into a mess, or maybe the fact that they weren’t at that stage...yet).

Oh. Oh, no. Keyleth realized it a minute too late. Vax was already pulling away from her and opening his bedroom door when something clicked in her mind.

“Are you okay?” Vax asked, noticing she hadn’t replied. Keyleth gulped and nodded. Her eyes were still wide in shock at her realization. She shook her head, forcing herself to file that thought away for later, and said, “Yeah. Sorry.”

“No studying?”

“No. I think I’m going to call my dad. It has been a while since we talked.”

Vax nodded, “That’s a great idea. I… I really liked talking to you today. It has been a while since we did that.” Vax admitted bashfully.

“Yeah… it has,” Keyleth looked at her hand on the doorknob. An awkward silence started to settle between the two like a snowflake about to hit the pavement, but Keyleth stopped it before it could land, “I’m gonna go call my dad now. Bye, Vax.”

“Bye,” He replied as Keyleth walked into her room.

The door closed, and Keyleth was left with the gray clouds beyond the window, casting a gloomy light in the bedroom. A tear slid down her cheek when she realized, with a broken heart, exactly how much she missed talking with Vax, how comfortable and safe she felt with him, and how easy it was to say what was on her heart to him. They still had a long path ahead, but this felt like the first stitch to mending her broken heart. A stitch of golden thread, like the lines of fate from the fairytales her mother used to read to her. Keyleth still had that nagging realization from moments ago in the back of her mind, but one step at a time. First, to repair their friendship, and then… then she could think about whatever came after.

Without further thought, Keyleth wiped her tears with the sleeve of her shirt and grabbed her phone, dialing her father’s number. The calling beep sounded three times before a click, and Korrin’s voice said, ‘Hello?’ on the other side.

Keyleth smiled warmly at her father’s voice and readied herself for what was about to come, “Hey, Dad. You won’t believe what happened today.”

[bodywyrcs]

You cannot hate yourself into becoming a better version of you❤️

I've been going back and forth with how to start this blog today, and straight to the point seems the best way.

Its a conversation that has cropped up in both my counselling and sports therapy clinics recently. I often see people who hate how they feel, how they look or simply who they are; who call themselves all the names under the sun but wouldn't think twice about using that language on their nearest and dearest; and who tear themselves apart in front of me for the shame of expecting someone else to care about them. They overflow with compassion for everyone else, but run dry when it comes to themselves.

Change seems impossible. But carrying on without change is unbearable. So what do we do?

Unfortunately, I think we've been convinced somewhere along the line that for our self-esteem to improve we need external approval. By sacrificing our own needs for those of everyone around us we might become likeable? Perhaps if we lose a shed-load of weight, run a gnarly ultra-marathon, or win a big promotion in work people might think better of us? And maybe *THEN* - once we've truly proven our worth to everyone - we might be happy! But in my eyes, that's all upside down and back to front.

You see the problem is, self-loathing is never satisfied. In my late 20s I lost a lot of weight, I got a LOT of compliments and it powered me up. But I didn't *like* myself. I was starving myself and then using exercise to make up for when I was 'bad' - to the point I used up all my iron stores and became quite unwell (and OHMYGOD I was a diet bore! Sorry friends, you were very patient!). But the nice comments kept coming, so it fed my belief that I was doing the right thing.

Of course, being fuelled by other peoples perceptions isn't sustainable, because once you've achieved one thing, what next? How will you impress everyone again and continually prove your worth? It never ends. And the need for external praise and positive judgement means when it goes in the opposite direction it feels SO MUCH WORSE. Which is exactly what happened when a relationship at the time went bad and I piled the weight back on. A new sort of punishment! And so the cycle continued!

And that's a loooong way of saying, you are not a before or after photo. You are the one and only version of you. Right now. And learning to love, or just like and simply appreciate that person is the most important thing you can spend your energy on.

Because -and this is the bit I stake my whole being on - positive and sustainable change can only come from a place of true self-care and the absolute *BELIEF* that you are worth the effort. If you go to the gym to hurt or punish yourself, how long is that going to last? How long until the motivation disappears in a puff of smoke? But if you go to the gym because you value yourself; because you want to improve your strength; because you enjoy the feeling of using your muscles and pushing yourself towards new goals...then there's your incentive, no doubt! Self-care should never minimise who you are, and the people worth keeping around will never expect you to squash yourself into a smaller box to keep them happy.

The thing is, learning to value ourselves is HARD, especially if the negative inner-voice is well practised and LOUD. But if we don't learn to value ourselves and (heaven forbid) LOVE ourselves, why would we ever invest time and energy into looking after ourselves properly? And I'm not just talking about physical health, I'm thinking about boundaries, rest, creativity, and all the fun stuff inbetween. If we don't respect and understand ourselves, how do we know what we truly *need* or what we actually *enjoy* doing in the first place?

This last month I've LOVED seeing the talk on the Paralympics and the Olympics about self-care. These highly driven, outcome-focused individuals talking openly about taking time out to improve self-esteem and understand their mental health has been AMAZING.

But you don't need to be an elite athlete to be worthy of self-care and love. You simply need to exist, as you are - and maybe do a little bit of work to challenge those negative thoughts and get to know yourself better. There is no "correct" way to do it, its all trial and error and exploring what works for you. I started (years ago) by doing a guided meditation every day off YouTube for 10 minutes to calm my head down and understand what I actually needed - there are LOADS out there and they are FREE! Writing down those negative thoughts can help to get them out of your head - then go back later and challenge each one as if you're defending your closest, oldest friend. Come up with a morning mantra and tell yourself it in the mirror everyday. Book in a regular treat to show yourself that you care. Maybe consider some counselling to get you started if you feel you need guidance. It might not be comfortable to begin with, but small, regular and achievable action is the way to go. You can change the way your brain is wired, but it takes time - and that is most definitely something worth investing in.

[bacotri]

There We Are

The school is empty this time of the year. Except for the infirmary. Everyone's gone home for the summer, the heat was unbearable. Out of the entire school only the music room and the infirmary is allowed to open their air conditioner 24/7, naturally the choir club almost barricaded the music room for themselves.

That leaves only the infirmary, right? You would bet some sports club or health club would take the room, yeah? Sadly the room is open only to Ms. Dawn. Her and me.

I can't go back home. My parents live far from here, in some fishing village. I also can't stay at my apartment because we don't have any air conditioning. The city's been in lockdown since I don't know when. Because of the heat.

So one day, naturally, I got a heat stroke. Right after PE. Ms. Dawn forced this story out of me, and now I'm staying here.

"They just announced that we're obligated to work from home, except for essential workers," Ms. Dawn said as I laze around the infirmary bed.

"I can't go anywhere else then," I said, calculating my next move. I probably could squeeze a trip back to my fishing village. Slim chance, but I know some people who could help.

"Don't worry, I mean..." Ms. Dawn has a strange expression. "By some technicality this infirmary is a health facility, and health workers are considered essential."

"It's very flimsy Ms., besides I've hassled you long enough," I said.

"If anything we both are hassling the school for their AC." Ms. Dawn looked at the pile of clothes she brought. "I've already decided to stay here for a while as well, if you're okay with me."

I know what this sounds like. A young nurse and a growing high-schooler in the infirmary together while the city is going on lockdown. But rest assured that both Ms. Dawn and I see this as an inconvenience.

She told me, practically begged me, to stay here until the heat went down. I can't do anything since I am susceptible to the temperature it seems. Her sense of being a nurse and my weakness made us unable to do anything.

A week passed after I got that initial heatstroke, the heat kept swelling up. My apartment became an oven overnight, and so here we are.

The principal at first objected to me dragging my essential items to school. But he softened after Ms. Dawn explained the situation. Principal's a rich man, he already planned to ditch the country for a while hearing about the lockdown. This is a form of sympathy to him.

"I want you to be mindful of privacy though," Ms. Dawn said to me after a while. "As I am."

"Don't worry Ms., your side is yours, my side is mine," I reassured her.

The nights were silent. It feels wrong to spend the night at school, even more so with Ms. Dawn. We both climbed to the rooftop, like scripted, and with the night sky the heat was at least bearable.

"It's like a never ending summer, even though it's September," I said.

"Summers have festivals, fireworks, and a jolly mood," Ms. Dawn replied. "This... I don't know what this is, but it has none of that."

"We didn't get any snow this year, maybe because of the heat."

"Another reason to hate it then."

"Do you hate the heat, Ms. Dawn?"

"I can't go back home to my family, so do you, what else is there to feel but hatred."

"I don't know, even though the circumstances are like this, I find this heat a little calming. Don't you?"

We sat in silence. Watching the sky, the field, everything. Usually this time of night there'd still be activities, people running around home late, students hanging out in convenience stores.

"I used to go up rooftops with my ex," Ms. Dawn said suddenly. She took off her hair ornament to let her hair loose. "Sorry if I'm dumping on you, are you okay with listening to me?"

"Sure Ms., go ahead," I said, curious as to what her story is.

The field below starts to form shadows. They do that, nowadays. Shadows like my friends from school, teachers and staffs. Sometimes their figure is noticeable, like Wayne the buff guy from class D or Marin the tall model from class B.

"On hot days like this, our apartment has a rooftop large enough to put lawn chairs at. So we would go up there, strip down to our undies and just lie together, talking about nothing at all," Ms. Dawn continued.

"What happened?" I asked.

"It was five years ago, he and I just drifted apart."

"A fight?"

"No, it's not a firework or an explosion. Our love has always been a fire, slowly burning and slowly dissipates as well. Maybe the tinder has gone out, the wood's done, end of the line."

"I see."

Back to silence. Metaphors, like Milan Kundera said, are dangerous. Metaphors births love, from metaphors we connect dots easier and read people like poems or stories.

Her likening the love she experienced to a flame means there's shadow being imprinted on the walls, if there's any. Right now, between me and her, there's a sturdy wall of student-teacher relationships. But to her, a shadow is dancing to the tune of old flames.

That's maybe why she insisted on us going to the rooftop. To her, this is symbolic, something she grasped dearly out of her wreckage. To me, this is just two very lonely people watching the sky.

"Do you see them too?" She perked up suddenly. "Down there on the school track field."

"A bunch of shadows? Seems like they're preparing to do a race," I said.

"I've been working here for a while, there are stories about the track field. Some years past, this school has a promising standing on the local relay and 100m race scene. It's said that this school goes as far being scouted by the national team." She rambles.

We watched the shadows run. Ethereal, like smokes. That was a history, long ago, when the town was small and there's less competition.

"A few years before I got in, the previous school nurse told me, one of the racers passed away due to exhaustion. Right there on the tracks." Ms. Dawn idly plays with her blouse's buttons. "I wonder if they're replaying that scene."

"Whenever the time comes, Ms. Dawn, do you think..." I scooted closer to her, she didn't object. "That they would replay our little chat too?"

"Are we that significant?"

"What makes something significant, you think?"

"Well, it has to be more than the usual, right? Like the racers, or the exhaustion, both are significant."

"But I see a shadow kicking the school gate vending machine, that's not significant."

"Maybe it is to the machine."

We laughed a soft laugh, one taken by people worrying that their neighbors might hear. Ms. Dawn told me that the night's starting to drag, and it'd be better for us to spend it downstairs in the infirmary.

Nights became a blur after that. We watched the TV in the lounge, no sign of the government lifting that quarantine yet. Ms. Dawn said that her family evacuated because living so close near the ocean is becoming more and more dangerous.

Hostile winds, they call it. Winds carried by the heat of the ocean. They do nothing but rampage what little houses small villages has.

My parents also messaged me the other day urging me to read or watch the news. Keep them informed if there's any pattern to these winds. But I know that they're doing fine, since there's no way a generational line of seafarers would succumb to mere wind. They'd know what to do.

The town we're at is far from any large bodies of water. Only a small river trickles down to a lake, theorized to be made by a prehistoric meteor. Because our land is flat, and there's no indentation on the ground.

Point is, we're far from being victims to these winds.

One night, Ms. Dawn asked me to accompany her to the convenience store nearby the school. Usually this place is crowded by students, especially at night. Now only one or two is hanging around, trying their best to appear and act the usual.

We bought canned food, ready-to-eat meals, and generally miserable looking supplies. The store is slowly depleted of normal food. Vegetables can't stand the heat as much as we humans can, so does meaty products.

The school is no longer a sacred day-only place for me. The night halls and classes have been perverted by the two of us. The choir club left a long time ago, there's only so much they can do to hold on to this school. We got by because of technicality.

"I've been mulling over the shadows and what they're doing, Ms.," I said nonchalantly. We were preparing that night's meal.

"About the significance thing?" She asked. "Why mull over that? It's just a passing comment, not an actual theory."

"There's nothing else to think about, no classes, homework, anything that made this building a school."

A shadow run past by, seems like it's holding a bunch of books. It then nudges another shadow which caused the figure to drop what its carrying.

"I guess yeah, schools are made so that you guys think, that's the gist of it anyway." Ms. Dawn cracked open a beer.

"Some shadows act like regular high schoolers, going to class, raising their hands, going to the bathrooms together. Some act like delinquents, athletes, science nerds. If you're correct, these might be the most significant points of their life," I explained while serving her portion.

"Depressing to think about how many of it is here, not in some higher education or a workplace." She sipped on the can.

"How so?"

"High school isn't supposed to be the grand finale of your life, the 'most significant' moment. It's just a school phase. After that, now those are real life..." Ms. Dawn paused, observing me, sighed, then continued. "Shit. Real life moments which would be fair to call significant."

"You seem to think low of the high school experience."

"I don't, but there's so much more out there."

I noticed her hands are trembling as we continue to eat. Her tonal change, her expression. This isn't hatred, this is longing.

We agreed to do a shift on dishwashing. Today was her shift, but I snatched her plates and carried it to the sink. She protested, but I quickly shot her down.

"My treat," I said. "But I want something in return."

"What could a high schooler possibly want something out of me?" She said, clearly affected by the booze she's been gulping down. "You like me, don't you? Ogling my body every time we're together, you don't think I noticed? You want to have your way with me right?"

"I want none of that, Ms. Dawn, but it is something similar to that," I said, paying no mind to the awful connotation she just spat out.

A soft grunt that could be translated to "I'm listening" was heard. Alcohol is such a gateway to vulnerability. Maybe, besides the warming effect, that is why people socially drink. Because in one way it masks the need for actual trade-off of having your self esteem in line with being vulnerable. Replacing one mask of social norms with another of drunkenness.

"Please tell me why you hate me," I asked, sitting down next to her.

"You noticed." She smiled an awful smile. Is it defeat? It's definitely not shame, though. Like this is something that's supposed to be out there.

I don't think it's the alcohol. But it helped unveiling that hatred she tried so hard to hide. More than enough for me.

That's it with alcohol, though. The effect is so different person to person. I saw it with my own eyes, my uncle and my dad both drink a lot. Only one of them, my uncle namely, got in trouble. He became an angry abusive drunk. My dad instead latches on to my mom like she'd die tomorrow, refusing to let go.

I remember whenever I took a leave in junior high, my dad would ask my mom to open "that cabinet". In my mind, I'm giving them a space to enjoy whatever it is they're having. Alcohol is an archaeologist with a shovel, and it's trying to dig our truest selves.

"He was so good at wooing me, a true wordsmith, way beyond his years. He even left that mark on me, listen to how I talk, you hear it too right?" She said, clutching her blouse buttons. "I don't know how I talked before I met him, before he said all those things."

"I honestly don't hear it," I said.

"That's because..." she stopped before holding my hand again. "Don't hate me back for this, but that's because you're like him."

"How so?"

"One of my friend said it's flowery language. Only some people can speak like that, and you're one of them."

"I don't mind being described as flowery."

She inches closer to me. Her hands still clutching mine.

"I want us to lie closer, if it's okay, let me... let me hold you."

"Sure, Ms. Dawn."

"Call me Dawn, please, drop the Ms."

I didn't respond, I just hugged her. Nobody else but me, and maybe the ex, knows how her voice is when she's drowning her own tears. How she would involuntarily kiss my forehead and how rhythmic her sobs are.

Am I guilty when I'm doing this? Is it guilt or pity? This feeling is something so foreign to me.

There's a constant hum that permeates the air nowadays. I don't know when it starts. But the droning sound complements Ms. Dawn's heartbeat.

"He wasn't the best guy around, wasn't the prettiest, he's mediocre if looked from the outside. But when you hear him speak, it's like..." Seems like Ms. Dawn is searching for a metaphor. "I don't know, enchanting."

I kept my silence, letting her continue.

"But that's all he has. Words, promises, excuses. I can't be with someone whose vocabulary only consists of those. He tried to be better, but it never came to be."

"That's not hate, that's just disappointment," I mumbled.

"It's both. One is brought by the other." She started stroking my hair. "And I don't hate him for leaving, or for promises he wouldn't keep. Those are natural to him, like breathing."

"You hated yourself," I said.

"For accepting him, for all those years wasted on him. Now I see him in you, and I still..." She's practically pulling my hair now. "I still want this. I want you. What am I? It's been years but I still hear his voice every time you speak."

"But I'm not him, Dawn."

"Stop. Don't... don't say my name, I can't help myself if you do that."

"The way I say your name is different, Dawn, I'm not him."

I couldn't remember exactly what happened afterwards. All I know is the shadows around the school started floating around us. They seep from cracks on the windows, beneath doors and air vents.

I could recall how nice Ms. Dawn smells at that moment, her perfume. Something to latch on to. The most potent tool in the humans' body pertaining to memories are the olfactory system. That way, I could make Ms. Dawn an anchor.

The room spins, I can see her smile. She pulls me deeper into her embrace. The part of me that is me, and the part of her that is her, the walls we built around each other melted. Into nothing, a single grain of malt, a pathetic atom ready to be set aside.

She seems so far away, even though her corporeal body is right there. I tried my best to call out to her, but every shout is another tears falling onto her cheeks.

Mornings never seem so beautiful to me.

[riestr]

❝ You're up late. Come to bed already. See? You've got me fussing over you now. ❞ Arms loosely wrapped around Claude from behind, chin settling atop his head as he studied whatever Claude was writing below. Schemes, no doubt. Yet the hour was late, and the bed cold without Claude. ❝ You can afford to take a break. ❞ Sylvain could not help but yawn, ❝ C'mon, darling, it's dark out now, and I wanna go to bed, but I also want you there. ❞

              burdens of a leader mandate absolute focus on the war effort,     conjuring strategy upon strategy,     a scheme for each strategy,     a scheme for each strategy,     another strategy atop a strategy,     A SCHEME FOR A SCHEME   !!     complex web of a leader intermingled with responsibilities of a tactician much too frequently for his liking    ;    though that veritable truth shall never deter him from the path to his dreams     /     somehow,     each step forward lulled him to believing that long road will soon have its distance cut short,     short ’till that once elusive paradise of serenity was within arm’s grasp     ——     but alas,     reality masked each step closer,     forging a faux reality in which endless cycle prevails,     akin to those paintings that present an infinitely looping world.     never ending,     a perpetual struggle,     that is what he must accept.     /     no,     no,     THIS STRATEGY’S ALL WRONG   !

              with each passing thought,     previous fallacies     //     once obscured by darkness    &    bog of mind     //     are illuminated with each subsequent plan.     each calculations’ error becomes apparent,     very foundation of his plan falls     (   risks far higher than he’s willing to attempt,     allies’ precious lives still human,     nary tools of war to carve dream’s form.     what is his dream if not to share with the people,     who strive to aid him in this perilous journey   ?   ).      it frustrates him.     ire itself snakes lithe digits underneath the edges of impervious mask,     its gentle force enough to paint canvas of his face with itself     —     pair of furrowed brows,     accompanied by grit teeth,     CREASED FOREHEAD,     an impassioned conflagration that sparked in those verdant orbs that once held nature’s divine peace.     it is the guilty catalyst that urges mind to remain ignorant of time,     as if each passing minute did not further invoke cruel deity     (   speak its name    :    time.   )     that muses of a dreadful future should his plan prove lackluster.     it’s frustrating,     it’s frustrating,     IT’S FRU     —————     huh   ?

              evoked is a gasp from his lips,     jolting slightly in his seat as gems of his eyes dart quickly to identify pair of strong limbs around him.     perhaps being too lost in his work is something that may now guilt him a smidge,     realization dawning that these arms belong to his beloved,     albeit simply viewing them shouldn’t have been what evinced that    ;    no,     mere way they wrapped around him should serve as sufficient indicator   !     their touch is indelible,     warmth they offered unique    &    a treasure that many dreamed of     (   oh,     how fantastical were his hugs   ),     proven reality by subsequent quietude that quelled earlier vexations,     dying ember that allows for relaxed grin to curve corners of his lips,     curvature remaining as such in his arms.

              sylvain was the only one he could recall,     in all his years of living,     to make him feel this sense of security.     their love was a meticulously crafted puzzle that could not be solved by only one pair of hands,     but necessitate the use of two pairs,     a divine love forged by none other than they.     it was devotion.     it was trust.     it was communication.     it was love at every angle,     it was sweet as it was painful,     it was theirs    &    theirs alone to share with each other.     claude wouldn’t have it any other way,    &    he finds solace in that.

              ❛     oh,     sorry.     ❜     comes gentle but firm voice,     brushing against the lowest tonality as lids shut to bask in rarity of this moment.     sylvain’s delicate acts of affection come in abundance,     time’s eyes may attest to that,     though any memory of being asked to retire to bed eludes him.     particularly from sylvain    ;    could this be the first of many occurrences   ?     even he doesn’t know.     dwelling on such a topic is something he’d rather not do at current,     for his thoughts couldn’t stop returning to sylvain.     he was the sun that shone brilliantly in the woeful skies of his heart when seed of doubt,     rooted so deeply at the base of his person,     began its conquest of land.     even when his sun would hide    &    beyond the horizon,     he never truly stopped shining    ;    the world continued moving ‘round    &    ‘round,     a silent promise of his renewal.     even when he is not at his side,     he knows their love to be genuine,     sincere,     tantalizing.     ❛     guess i just lost track of time     …     ❜     even now,     as he speaks of time so frivolously,     he recalls the past.     those earlier days of past that paved way to beauteous future of their present.

              at friend’s return from year long     (   really five   )     slumber,     small influx of those legendary allies begun making their appearance,     one by one,     to dispose of barbarous thieves,     would dare rob the poor of their possessions,     notwithstanding innocents wanted naught more than peace during war time.     claude’s presence had been initially graved with only the original class of the golden deer     (   in some sense,     a reunion of leicester alliance folks   ),     an anticipated event that had been preceded by their promise from five years ago to meet at certain area    ;    spot where millennium festival was to be held,     monastery that once housed them as determined students,     flowers of the future,     prepared to face against the many challenges life had to offer in pursuit of their dreams.     t’was all innocuous,     a reunion that rekindled forged bonds that allow not for barriers to hinder any progress     ———     platonic,     camaraderie,     until conflicting feelings arose at the sight of him.     the man who’s become his light.

              orange locks were undeniably his,     distinct hairstyle that forsake once bedhead - like look,     opting for more refined appearance     —     curvature of face slightly different with growth,     a kiss from maturity that granted him to bloom,     compounded with charming smile that struck envy into nature’s gifts     (   for even they could never replicate the jubilation or desire that sparked within claude   ),     yet what stood the test of time are those caramel hues,     subdued    &    withholding greatest mystery that every part of him burned to solve.     though he restrained himself.     he must.     love is an incurable disease that can initiate the downfall of one,     it has the potential to be blessing or curse,     it can be an intoxicating reality that could stray one from designated path towards the future.     no matter how many smiles they may grace one another with    ;    how many drinks shared accompanied by laughs    &    extensive conversations that moon,     stars,    &    sun witnessed at their ignorance of time’s march    ;    how many battles fought at each other’s side,     back - to - back,     resolute hearts connecting to escape impending peril,     love would never plant its kiss of death on him   !

              &    yet he is the fool who erroneously thought so.     but what is man but a pawn on a mission to listen to knowledge’s teachings    &    rectify those mistaken beliefs whilst conjuring divergent ideals that may fix the status quo   ?     claude is only man,    &    he does not resign himself to love   ;    rather,     love’s embrace has sparked a newfound joy in him that is naught but an electrical fire that has created a new song,     a song of unity,     a song that unites knight    &    leader     ———     he loves it.     he loves sylvain.     were anyone to assert that loving him is a poison he must immediately renounce,     then damned be temptation,     for his lips would not resist    &    drink from the poison that has given life    &    dreams newer meaning to take on.     he hopes for those hands that aided him in solving love’s puzzle shall,     likewise,     aid him in solving the greater puzzle that will light the road to the paradise of his dreams.     a world with a new dawn.     a world where peace resonate in the hearts of all.     A WORLD WITHOUT BARRIERS.     this is the future he envisions    ;    at his side,     sylvain     ——     his beloved that his heart beats for.     love is a virtue,     as much as it is a puzzle.     he is thankful to have found it.

              ❛     sorry,     mi amor.     i didn’t mean to make you worry too much,     no más estaba ocupado.     ❜     melodious tone is deeply entangled with his voice    &    for a moment,     he thinks it’s his soul way of doing away with previous ire    &    facilitating the light - hearted moments that never failed to make claude crave more,     more.     head tilts back,     deep breath taken,     before lungs pushes a quivering breath past his lips    &    against sylvain’s chin.     lids rise to see him,    &    was all it took.     voice,     touch,     care.     ❛     c’mon,     you got my mind off of this.     maybe that’s a good thing   !     right now,     ❜     he stands upright from his seat,     turns to tilt head up    &    marvel at those chocolate hues that captivate him     /     the stars may shine brightly above us,     my love,     but none will ever shine brighter than my love for you.     /     takes step forward    &    leans in,     pressing brief kiss against his lips.     fleeting,     but similar to the last ones    &    future kisses to come    :    full of love.     ❛     i’ve only got you on my mind now.     so let’s go rest,     yeah   ?     i think my next strategy is finding the quickest way into your arms.     ❜

              as he moved onward,     he knows he’s never alone.     as long as he’s by his side,     he knows that darkness will never triumph over the light of their love.       /       @amournful

[lowkeyerror]

Her First & Her Future

Maddy Perez x Reader

Word Count: 2.7k

Warnings: Angst, slight substance abuse (weed), Nate Jacobs, physical assault

Summary: Y/n Jacobs and Maddy Perez had something special. It wasn't long before Nate noticed and decided he wanted what Y/n had. Though Maddy ends up with Nate it seems like she can't get Y/n off her mind.

An: Someone said a Maddy series and I am a lady of the people so buckle up. I will say I intentionally changed some of the timeline of the series to fit better, hope yall still enjoy it.

Pt. 2 Pt.3 Pt.4

Masterlist

Y/n knew Maddy more than she was supposed to. They had been friends before Maddy started dating her brother. The beginning of her relationship with Nate was the end of the friendship between the two.

It wasn't the obvious betrayal it seemed to be. There was probably something in the code of friendship about dating each other's siblings. However this was deeper.

Y/n had held Maddy through cold nights. She had consoled her whenever she was going through it with her parents. Y/n loved Maddy.

Maddy loved Y/n too. She would make sure the girl ate because she always forgot. She made Y/n smile through the tears Nate had caused her. Maddy even held Y/n through the hot summer days.

They were young lovers. They had been each other's first. Y/n was familiar with every inch of Maddy's body. She knew things about it that even the other girl didn't. Y/n knew how to get Maddy's body to sing three part harmonies with a single touch.

Nate couldn't do that, Y/n was certain. There were only two things Nate had that Y/n didn't; a penis and an ego.

His ego wasn't even real. It came from a place of insecurity. Yet he was the one that Maddy had chosen to be with. He was the one holding her now. He got to be her future whereas Y/n was stuck being her first.

It wasn't fair. Nate already had everything. He was the favorite child, the popular boy, the star quarterback. He could've had any girl, but he chose the one he'd known would hurt Y/n.

Maddy never told Y/n that she and Nate were dating. The girl found out with every other person at the school. As soon as she saw the pair walking down the hallway, she left the premises. She skipped the rest of that school day.

She began to softly spiral. Y/n didn't like hard drugs. She didn't like pills or coke or anything too dangerous. The girl did like to get high on occasion.

Seeing Nate with Maddy was unbearable unless Y/n was high. She became a regular pothead. She smoked every day, working overtime to make sure the smell didn't stick around her too much.

Her friends began taking notice. They were worried for the girl. The only one who knew about why the girl had suddenly become so dependent on cannabis was Lexi.

" Have you guys seen Y/n?"

" Not since earlier when we were all together, why?"

Lexi shook her head and continued searching for her friend. She ended up accidentally bumping into Nate on her way outside.

" Have you seen your sister?"

He shook his head," She's been ditching a lot lately. No idea where."

" Since when does Y/n ditch?" Maddy asked from beside her boyfriend.

Lexi rolled her eyes," I think you can piece it together."

She continued walking past the couple. Maddy's posture dropped for a second before Nate squeezed her hand. She held her head high and continued walking the halls.

Lexi found Y/n under the bleachers by the football field. The girl was laying flat on her back with her arms and legs stretched out.

" Jesus Christ, Y/n."

Slowly the girl's head turned to Lexi, her eyes an unnatural hue of red. " I think my heart is going to explode."

" You're missing class again."

" Who cares?"

Lexi sat on the grass next to Y/n. " I care because now I'm missing class too."

" I'm sorry." Y/n did her best to sit up, her breathing was extremely shallow.

" I hate seeing you like this." She places her hand on top of Y/n's.

Y/n looks straight ahead," I just don't want to feel anything anymore."

" Don't say that," Lexi squeezes Y/n's hand.

Y/n head hangs," It's the truth. Nothing feels good, Lexi. I'm not safe at school, I'm not safe at home, she's going to be there, with him, wherever I go."

Lexi looks at her friend, thinking of her next move very carefully. The hand that rests on Y/n's moves. It trails up the girl's arm to her face, lightly cupping her cheek.

This catches Y/n's attention. She leans into Lexi's touch, her intoxication leading her.

" You don't need her to feel good," Lexi pauses, her thumbs swiping over Y/n's bottom lip," Anyone can make you feel good."

" Lexi-"

The brunette kisses Y/n. Her lips move experimentally against her friend's. The young Howard straddles Y/n as they continue to kiss.

It's easy for Y/n to get caught up in her high state. The sensation of Lexi's warm lips on hers enough to silence the alarms going off in the back of her mind. It's not until Lexi's hips roll on Y/n, that the alarms start ringing loudly.

Y/n pulls back," What're we doing?"

Lexi's face is flushed, her chest heaves up and down," I don't know."

Her thumbs swipes at Y/n's lip again, trying to remove the trace of lipstick that she left there.

" So this is why you were looking for her."

Lexi tries to remove herself from Y/n, but the pothead locks her arms around Lexi's waist. In this state she could care less about her brother and Maddy's reaction.

" It's not really any of your business is it?" Y/n responds to the girl.

Maddy looks furious while Nate seems indifferent. The look the Latina has on her face is enough to scare Lexi, but Y/n stays unphased.

Y/n unhooks her arms from around Lexi, to get to her feet. Her vision is a little blurry and her footing isn't the best, but all that matters to her is that she is standing.

" You can barely stand," Nate points out.

" I'm fine," Y/n shoots back at him.

Nate glances at Lexi and then back at Y/n," It's fine that you're spaced out, but she's not."

Y/n scoffed," Lexi isn't like that. She wouldn't take advantage of me just because I'm not sober."

Before anyone could say anything else, Y/n is walking away from the bleachers." Let's go, Lex."

Lexi doesn't look at the couple, instead follows after Y/n.

" I'm going to take you home, there's no way you can go to class like this." Lexi takes Y/n's hand and drags her to the parking lot.

She struggles, but eventually gets Y/n into the car. The drive to Y/n's is quick and quiet. Lexi went to get out of the car but Y/n grabbed her wrist.

" Why'd you kiss me?"

" Because," she let out a sigh, " words are never enough for you."

Y/n nodded, she slowly leaned over to the driver's side of the car," It felt pretty good Lex."

Lexi took that as her sign to hop out of the car. Y/n's passenger door opened soon after. The Jacobs girl walked around the car to meet Lexi face to face.

" Y/n, you're my best friend and I love you, but I can't."

Y/n brought her chin down to rest on Lexi's shoulder," I'm sorry, I'm all fucked up."

Lexi wraps her arms around the girl," It's ok, let's just get you inside."

Lexi helped Y/n get inside and took her to her room. Y/n face planted on the bed, her body still tingling from the weed.

" You can go back to school, Lex. I'll be fine," she mumbled against her bedsheets.

" Are you sure?"

" Ya I'll be fine."

Lex looked at her friend, face down on the bed. She was hesitant to leave her in this state. This reminded her of her other friend. For a moment she was scared of addiction taking over another person she cared about.

" Y/n, be careful ok?"

The girl on the bed nodded. She felt herself drifting into a deep sleep.

Lexi looked at her one more time, before returning to school.

It had only been an hour since Lexi left when Y/n awoke to a pounding on her front door. The doorbell was ringing obsessively to accompany the banging. She was still groggy from her nap as she went to get the door.

When she opened it, she found Maddy standing on her porch.

" Nate is at school, " she tried to shut the door in Maddy's face, but the Latina wasn't having it. She pushed past Y/n and made her way into the house.

" What, trying to kick me out because your bitch is here?"

" What are you talking about? "

Maddy glares at the girl, " Lexi. Lexi Howard, my best friend's sister. You think you're funny, don't you?"

Y/n's mind begins to clear, " There's nothing going on between me and Lexi."

Maddy's hand lays on her hip," Oh really? Then what was that under the bleachers"

Y/n glared back at the girl, " Are you really doing this right now? Maddy it's none of your business. You're my brother's girlfriend. That's it. I don't care if you saw me fucking her in my room, it doesn't have shit to do with you."

" You know that's a fucking lie. I'm more than just your brother's girlfriend."

" No, you're not. You made your choice Maddy, and it wasn't me, " Y/n told her making her way back to her room.

Maddy was hot on her trail." Y/n, you know I care about you."

Y/n began to laugh," Yes, of course because everyone who cares about me fucks my brother behind my back. "

" It wasn't like that. "

" Then what was it like Madeleine," she cringed when Y/n used her full name," All I know is that we had something. Then all of a sudden we didn't because you wanted Nate."

" Y/n-"

Y/n chuckled as she sat on her bed, " I loved you. So much and... my fucking brother. Out of all the people."

Maddy doesn't know how to respond. There's nothing really she can say to fix this. " It just happened Y/n, please. I would never hurt you like this. You know me."

" I thought I did, but I was wrong. You don't get how fucked up this is Maddy. After you're done fucking my brother, you call me. You blow up my phone because you feel guilty. You want me to sit here and take all of this disrespect, but I just can't."

Maddy has tears pricking at her eyes, but Y/n won't look at her.

" Y/n, I love you."

Y/n shut her eyes tight. " You can't possibly love me. Not after all you put me through, Maddy."

Maddy makes her way over to Y/n. She gently cups the other girl's face. Y/n keeps her eyes closed.

" Baby, please."

Y/n began to shake her head," I just can't Maddy."

Y/n placed her hand over Maddy's and removed it from her face.

It was over then. Maddy walked out of the room. Y/n's back hit the mattress and tears slid down her face.

Months pass and Y/n has a front row seat to just how toxic Nate and Maddy are for each other. Most of the time she's too high to see all of the details.

What she does notice is the obnoxious gifts that Nate is always buying for Maddy. The way the girl always wears his gifts out to school the next day. Y/n thinks of her as his barbie doll in that sense. He gets to dress her up like he wants and she gets a new wardrobe.

She keeps her distance from them, as much as she can. However, they live in a small town and she can't avoid them forever.

" No weed tonight, you promised," Lexi is quick to rip the joint out of Y/n's hand.

Y/n didn't fret, just sighed as they walked through the carnival.

" Fine, but you owe me the time of my life tonight ."

Lexi nudges Y/n's shoulder, "When have I ever let you down?"

Y/n smiles at the brunette, "Never, you're a ride or die."

The night is fun for the most part, but it takes a turn when Y/n and Lexi meet up with Cassie and the other's. The weird energy had made Y/n want to take a smoke break.

Lexi might've taken a joint, but Y/n had more than one on her. With the excuse of a bathroom break, she breaks away from the strange group.

She looks for a secluded place to smoke. That's when she sees them. Nate stalks towards Maddy, who was cowering in fear. It wasn't her business, but when Nate's hands wrapped around Maddy's throat it became her business.

With adrenaline running through her veins Y/n quickly approached the pair. Her hands quickly closed around Nate's waist and she threw the boy to the ground. He was quickly on his feet.

" What the fuck is wrong with you, Nathaniel?"

Y/n saw her brother's fists clenching by his sides. His eyes shifted over to Maddy's as he expected her to defend him.

" I don't care what she says, I know what I saw. I know the type of person you are. So go cool off Nate," Y/n's eyes never left his as she spoke.

He took one more glance at Maddy, but then stalked off. As soon as he was out of sight Y/n was quick to turn her attention to Maddy.

Y/n's eyes shot straight for the bruises forming around Maddy's neck. She wanted to be in disbelief, but she knew her brother. He'd always been violent.

" He'll keep hurting you if you let him," it was a whisper.

" I know," she says back softly.

Y/n offers her hand," Let me take you home."

Maddy shakes her head," I'm good."

Y/n takes Maddy's hand in her's, " Maddy, you're not good."

At those words, Maddy collapses in the other girl's arms. Her body shakes with sobs. Y/n holds her tightly, only now fully grasping what happened.

She keeps Maddy's hand in hers and guides her out of the secluded area. Against Maddy's previous wishes, Y/n ends up taking her home.

Maddy's house is empty when they arrive. They went straight up to her room. Maddy tries to pull herself together, wiping the tears from her eyes. Y/n fidgets as she waits for the girl to say something. The need to smoke quickly returned to her system.

" You're scratching like an addict," Maddy breaks the silence.

" I'm nervous."

" And you want to smoke."

Y/n meets the girl's eyes," Maddy is now really the time? He choked you, what would have happened if I wasn't there?"

" It doesn't matter, I'm fine."

Y/n raised her voice," That's bullshit! He put his hands on you, Maddy. That's something he could go to jail for. It's assault."

" I'm not pressing charges."

Y/n's mouth drops open," I don't know how to help you. I just don't understand what you see in him. He's just toxic."

" And you aren't? "

Y/n voice dangerously falters," What did you just say to me?"

" There's that famous Jacob's temper, I know so well."

Y/n blinks at the girl a few times. " Nate is my brother by blood, not by choice. Maybe we're more similar than I'd like to admit, but I'd never put my hands on you. I'd never gaslight you into thinking you owe me something after buying you luxury coats. I would never break your heart like he has."

" He loves me."

Y/n snorts after Maddy says that. " No, he loves having control over you. He loves that you are his possession."

" That's not true."

" I know him better than you do. It's funny I actually know both of you better than you know each other. When he breaks your heart for the last time, I want an apology."

Y/n exits with those being her last words to Maddy. What happened between Maddy and Nate was no longer her business. She tried to get through to the girl, but it was no use.

Nate had her under his spell and there was nothing Y/n could do about it. 

[sassyabbs]

Smut headcanons: George Weasley.

[Notes: Well, a little love to my man, bless his hands.

Also, I'm sorry if there's any mistakes, english isn't my first language. And I'm sorry for taking so long]

WARNINGS: NSFW! CONTENT, thigh riding, slightly Dom/sub, hand kink (?), sexual innuendo in public (but not so clear), a little vainilla.

Honestly, having sex for George Weasley had never been a priority.

Sure he enjoyed it, but he never found it to be something to get addicted to.

He remembered fifth year, how his friend Lee would throw his head back talking about the wonderful blow job that a girl had given him. It was never like that for him.

Sure he had his tastes and Lee his, but even when he was pulling a girl's hair in sixth year, something he had been dreaming about a few months ago, it didn't feel so great. It was weird, he even thought his friends were pretending how much they liked sex.

But he also knew that he had never loved any girl he had sex with.

So when Fred and George hired you to serve customers in their store, he hung around you for about a year, unable to touch you.

It was unbearable, you stayed away because you didn't want to get involved with someone from work and less a boss as direct as George.

But not being able to touch you drove him crazy. He had to watch you flit all over the place every day, unable to do anything, just look at you and have little talks.

It was no surprise that after a few more in-depth talks in the backstore, you finally said yes to a date and it ended up with the two of you in bed.

That time it was definitely something, the two of them came fast and hard, looking into each other's eyes and forgetting about everything.

It was devastating for George, who soon dragged you into his arms and fell asleep in your bed.

You both didn't get their hands off each other in the morning either, not at breakfast either, and at the end you had a quickie before George rushed to lunch at The Burrow.

Of course when he showed up to his parents' house in yesterday's clothes, wet hair and sparkling eyes Fred couldn't help but laugh out loud and annoy him for the rest of the afternoon.

But he didn't care, he was so caught up in that feeling that there wasn't anything but your walls enveloping him that he hardly noticed.

Almost without hesitation, after lunch and spending a few hours in the company of his family, he returned home and took his time with you.

Well you took your time with him, you rode him looking into his eyes, his hands clenching your thighs and your fingers digging into his hair and pulling every time it was too much.

George wouldn't believe there was a whole world outside of the bed he shared with you.

You looked like the owner of the world while you rode it, with your skin shining and your breast bouncing.

He became a little addicted the first months.

So of course you two had a lot of quickies.

And with that he became a little too touchy.

Kissing your neck and lips while he's passing next to you at work.

Grabbing your hips from behind when you couldn't reach the cabinets to help you get something.

Gently pull the strands of your hair when they tease each other.

Rubbing his crotch with your butt when he had to pass and the hallway was small for both of us (this happened more times than expected).

And holding your hand all the time, if there wasn't a good reason to let you hand go, he wouldn't release your fingers.

The bad and good thing we're that all of this things were things that he did during sex. So you would be at least a little turned on after these.

He also loves teasing you about how wet you are after that.

"How is it that my baby is wet after a little neck kiss? You must be thinking about me all the time."

You would act as if you were really mad, but you would let him drag you into a closet and fingering you to a wonderful release.

You would also love give him a hand job, it just felt the right way with him in your hand, going up and down as you pleased.

Everytime that you would give him a hand job, his own hands wouldn't be still.

He will let his hands grab your hips, then when you got him all nervous, his hands would go up and grab your tits.

He probably needed the support anyway, you loved to mess with him.

And then your wrist, his bin hand around your wrist to stop you when it would be too much.

"That's it, make me cum now or I won't let it feel nice for you."

He never fullfil that warning, he loved too much seeing you orgasm that the opportunity wouldn't be lost, even if you are the one who receives the pleasure.

You two tried a lot of things in bed, not all of them went good, but nothing felt glorious in a way that you couldn't live without it.

One of the things that went good was thigh riding, from both of you.

He loved seeing you riding him, it didn't matter that it wasn't his dick, he loved you riding him in anyway.

And when he was riding your thigh it would be a great view.

He would have to adjust to your position, sometimes crouching down and other times almost standing on his tiptoes.

And the he would be moving his hips, rubbing with his pants still on, on your leg. Sometimes you would unzip them and give him a manual job, other times you would make him cum on his pants.

He was definitely a switch, for the little dom/sub that you both tried.

It was good, but mostly of the time you two wouldn't want to think about an scene, you guys would just want to fuck while getting lost on eachother's eyes.

It was healing for you two having that kind of connection during sex.

You both love it.