#<- very slight ig?

[lyionly]

/ I'm not afraid of forgiveness / I'll absolve you everything / I'm not afraid of lying, but I am afraid of DYING!! /

I drew @acethehorseishere 's mastermind!Ace 'cause I really enjoy the design ^^

[stardustedknuckles]

I Am Once Again Asking Why Antibiotics Make Me Feel Like Someone Who Has Never Been Disabled

[watermel0ns-dumb-cringe]

behind the scenes

[dontfindmeimscared]

5 years difference, feels like progress! :D

[tumblr stole the quality :( click to see it better]

[tyrianludaship]

Channeled the energy of being a hater to such a extent that I got psychic damage and now I have a headache fuck

[withered--s0uls]

Chat...

Cyn,,,

rambling ab how I see DAS!Cyn in the lyrics

"in the city of the dead

i lay stuck inside my bed

the house burns down around me

the language of the lost

pouring from their open mouths

nobody can hear a thing

suddenly i’m breathing in the smoke

surrounded by the bodies

as i’m tugging on my chains

i’ll be swallowed by the flames

freedom dripping from the sink"

⬆️ The Solver taking over her mind and body slowly

"i don’t need forgiveness

i just wanna talk and for you to listen

i know i’d only raise the suspicion of my cause

my burns they throb to the beat of your heart"

&

"temperament or sickness?

holler all you want, no one ever listens

if only i had raised my suspicion of the cause

would you have noticed it at all?"

⬆️ Her relationship with DAS!V, she knows V is suspicious of her as is. Cyn blames herself for what happens and doesn't think she deserves to be forgiven. She just wants V & co to understand where the line between her and the Solver falls

"am i a robot or a doll?

am i anything at all?

maybe a soul like me

doesn’t even need to know

am i big or am i small?

hunching over standing tall?

i lost my identity

oh so very long ago"

&

"as i woke up from the dream

i had lost all self esteem

the burning home had cowed me

i thought that i was safe

now i’ll never be the same

tossed aside for making a scene

do i know who i pretend to be?

of whom am i a copy?

yes it made me who i am

but i’ll never understand

why it had to happen to me"

⬆️ Cyn honestly doesn't know who she is anymore, or who she's expected to be. I wont go into her backstory pre manor too much bc ✨spoilers✨ BUT pretty much from the day she booted up people expected her to be a specific way. It didn't end well and then her second chance was ruined by the Solver, who corrupted so much of her that people see them as the same person. That whole trauma also shaped her, she's different than how she used to be.

"software update, reinstall

scary things i can’t recall

making the best of it"

&

"ones and zeros

true or false?

reset system to default

faking the rest of it, but i can’t remember why"

⬆️ PTSD flashbacks and her desperately trying to erase that part of her.

"never even knowing why

on my knees i try to crawl

fire breaking in the walls / fire charred collapsing walls

calling out for somebody

knowing i’ll get no reply"

⬆️ NOT regular DAS -- BUT Trapped/Hivemind Cyn which means also Trapped Dormancy Cyn... calling out to N in the void of her mind...

"not robot nor a doll

i’m not anything at all

i’m just and entity finding out the way to go

but these fingers and these palms, full of love despite the scars

they show indisputably

i have so much more to grow

oh, i can change i can evolve

i can get up when i fall

i’ll live contentedly

i don’t need a reason why standing tall and standing strong

i have found where I belong in the arms of somebody

there is no more need to cry"

⬆️ Healing under the care of her family :)

[desalvar]

the desalvars - reposting this one here for reference and a general overview of the weird geneaology. my favourite family full of photocopies of each other 💜💜

[girl-bateman]

Feeling a debilitating sense of dread and despair 🤨 Which probably means nothing😍👍

[maladaptivedaydreamsx]

I'm just sad we'll never get to know Rio's actual birthday, cause they always celebrate on the day Emma found him instead.

(Nothing wrong with wanting to separate from your birthday for personal reasons) but they go so far as to tease that info but not give it in one of the birthday stories, so it's been bugging me ever since they sorta put it in your face like that

[toytulini]

idk. picky eater rights. im coming to your events and turning my picky bitch nose up at your fancy ass desserts you spent a bajillion hours working over in the kitchen and asking if i can find like a basic ass brownie with no extra flairs or ingredients or steps or whatever the fuck. cry about it. stop trying to feed me

[yeahyouresocool]

it's so fun having lae'zel in my party this time around lol

[chompe-diem]

y’all at this rate i’ll be caught up to main campaign stuff by maybe mid-april??? huge

[bingobongobonko]

i broke the first rule of intrusive thoughts, being that you dont question why its happening. uuuuuuuuuuuuuugh

[waywardsalt]

beating back my own ambitions like look i have a hard enough time reigning in my own ideas dont be pulling this shit

[ne0nlightzz]

"I wanna be a dog trainer when I grow up" -Me most my childhood cuz of those dog trainer school commercials and I didn't even have a dog then.

"I wanna be a writer" "I wanna be a photographer" are more recent ones I've said. But now? Fuck I just want motivation to freakin do my school work and have the energy to do those hobbies....and dog training? Lol kid ya are delusional because this puppy we found and kept is making me want to lay in the road and actually do my school for fun instead of trying to train and raise a puppy cuz i ain't got the patiences for this little dude, my stress levels ain't been this high inna awhile...

...who the hell in my family though it'd be a good idea to keep this puppy and give me the full responsibility...I can't even take care of myself because I get burnt out from just existing and get overwhelmed by the damn sound of my ceiling fan...now i sure as hell ain't taking care of myself cuz I'm actually applying myself to this puppy ontop my usual chores and can't do school (home schooled...unschooled ifykyk.) And haven't had time to write, do any hobbies or anything or even shower haft the time...

[c1trvswurld]

my transness as someone who doesnt feel super heavy dysphoria anymore and only euphoria is so funny. bc I'm sitting down pondering if I'm trans and if I've just convinced myself to be due to societal factors around womanhood + I'm very young. But then I realized its not really normal to strictly want to perform femininity if I'm still very much seen as a trad man, its not normal to just be begrudgingly "fine" as a girl, not rlly normal to idolize men and heavy masc people for looks and voice