the videos Vash posts online are funny and friendly but also in a way very impersonal, showing nothing of his deeper thoughts. There’s a two minute video of him laying on his back in a parking lot talking about unrealistic gun techniques and handling in shows, one video about using doughnuts as targets to see if he can shoot through the center without destroying them, but he never voices opinions or broaches serious subjects. It’s all lighthearted, no shadows.
which is why the video discovered online several weeks after the July Incident is such a shocking contrast.
*There’s something wrong with the camera, the image is so distorted it might be pointed at a face or it might just be random shadows. The audio is full of static and it takes a moment for the voice to come through*
“--actually made it, I can’t believe my phone actually survived that. That’s beyond ridiculous, it’s insane.”
*there’s a sound something like laughter. It cuts off abruptly*
“. . . insane, it’s insane, it’s completely . . .”
*static for several seconds*
“I need to say something, I need to tell you . . . but they’re not--the ones I really need to tell--they aren’t--”
*there’s something wrong with the speaker’s voice but beyond the slurring of words its hard to pinpoint what exactly with all the static interfering. The patchy shadows swoop into fractured lights and colors as the camera is re-positioned*
“. . . never put dates on this videos they’re not important, They automatically go into a queue to post whenever . . . But right now, today . . .”
*a distorted face and red torso are discernible now but the image is fractured and repeated so the person doesn’t look so much human as made up of too many human parts with with bright flares of light feathering the red edges into white*
“I’m having trouble, my head won’t work right. I don’t--I do know, I know, that today the date is important, I need to remember, I can’t let myself . . . what I’ve done. It’s my fault, I did this.”
*the audio is becoming more and more distorted, the semblance of an eye surrounded by a dozen copies looks at the camera, blue and alien but clear*
“Today is July 21st.”
*the next words spoken are strained as if said through clenched teeth and so soft they are almost lost in the static*
“I have no right to say this, as if it will fix something, but I can’t not say it--”
*several seconds of static*
“. . . I’m sorry--”
*the video ends*
Though widely believed to have been posted by Vash the Stampede the video has never been concretely linked to him
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Migration Patterns snippet
“Pretty obvious,” Tim told her. “I mean. I was in the room when you set his childhood legacy on fire and he spent the entire time staring like you were something he couldn’t wait to put in his mouth.” He reached, stole the wine. Elle let it happen. “Plus,” Tim added, wiping his lips on the back of one bruised to hell wrist, after a hefty chug, “You left together. He tucked you inside his jacket.”
A laugh, nearly silent, hidden against her neck. Jason’s mouth- Jason’s teeth- entire gesture charmingly soft and still something that left Elle shivering if she thought about it hard enough. Three knives, two guns, and Elle, precious against his person.
Held.
Elle switched legs to lean on, juddering as she went, unable to stay still. “That’s just- affection.”
Wine discarded, last of his coffee tipped dramatically to catch every dreg, Tim made an absolutely scathing sound. “Jason doesn’t touch people.”
Jason, whose sheer physicality tore open every attempt to stymie the fond, hungry desires of her heart. Never more than a reach away, those first three days they’d known each other again. Smooth confidence that made her feel a little insane- care, Jason was so fucking careful it made Elle want to break things, wrapping his arm around her in rain, pulling her out of the way of fire, one broad hand between her skull and brick.
“What?”
Tim hauled himself upright by grabbing the island. “You want a latte?”
It was not, apparently, a request that required answering. Elle stared at the sea green wine bottle, and tried not to think about the incredible color of Artemis’s eyes. The way Kori had lifted Elle straight off her feet in a hug, six and a half feet of stunning curves.
Elle liked herself just fine.
She wasn’t even jealous, exactly- embarrassed, thoroughly- explosively attracted, yes- maybe they’d let her go lay on Amazonian beaches without her more gorgeous other half, and she could finally learn how to use Messalina’s sword.
New York could have her back in any need. Jason could keep Gotham. Her heart might as well also get her home.
It might even be a nice exile. Donna was cool as hell, and Elle probably had just enough Warden inherited Greek lurking in her brain that she’d be able to read the books in their famous citadel.
Tim pushed a coffee mug into her nerveless hands. Perfect froth- little bits of culinary lavender and rose from her tea cabinet sprinkled over, clear if unneeded evidence Tim had gone exploring.
Elle took a sip. “Where’d the milk come from?”
Rather than retreat back to his hiding place, Tim lowered himself down across from her. Stared for a just a second, before his mouth twitched. “You’re freaking out.”
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I found myself having, not exactly an argument recently, but a highly opinionated conversation with someone who did not believe my assertion that once upon a time there were official Hello Kitty vibrators. With the aid of the Wayback Machine, I found this article, and thought the world at large might enjoy it too...
Here's the text of the article:
The history of the Hello Kitty vibrator
By Peter Payne
October 4, 2004
Sanrio is one of the top character licensors in the world, having more or less created the business model of doing business by creating something that doesn't really exist and licensing its use to other companies. Sanrio produces nothing -- all their characters, like the Little Twin Star, Minna no Ta-bo, Bad Batz-Maru, exist as legal entities and nothing more. Their most successful character, Hello Kitty, or Kitty-chan as she's known in Japan, is now now thirty years old.
One of the many companies that license Sanrio's characters for their products was a Japanese company called Genyo Co. Ltd. Genyo made a wide variety of products, from bento boxes to children's toys to chopsticks, many with the Hello Kitty character on them. They scored big in the late 1990's with an off-the-wall hit, a series of Hello Kitty toys which featured a different Kitty figure from each of Japan's 47 prefectures, each representing something the prefecture was famous for. (The figure from Gunma Prefecture, where we live, represented a wooden kokeshi doll.)
In 1997, Genyo designed a product that would live in infamy: the Hello Kitty vibrating shoulder massager, which really is a shoulder massager (trust us -- it says so on the package). Sanrio approved this design without batting an eye, and the product enjoyed modest sales in toy shops and in family restaurants like Denny's and Coco's. It wasn't until 1999 or so that people began to catch on to the fact that the Hello Kitty massager had other potential uses, and with amazing speed, they started popping up in adult videos in Japan. The next thing anyone knew, they had changed into a cult adult item, sold in vending machines in love hotels -- after all, what self-respecting man wouldn't buy his girl a Hello Kitty vibrator when she asked him for one?
The emergence of the Hello Kitty vibrator as a cult adult item caused friction between Sanrio and Genyo, and Sanrio ordered the company to stop making the units. Genyo refused, since it had paid a lot of money to license Kitty for their products. There seemed nothing Sanrio could do, since they had approved the item for sale (see the official Sanrio sticker on the boxes). The answer came when the Japanese tax authorities raided Genyo on suspicion of tax evasion. It seems that some creative accounting was going on between the president of the company, a Mr. Nakamura, his vice president, and the owner of the factory in China where the units were made. All three were arrested, and Sanrio had the excuse needed to yank Genyo's license. They seized the molds used to make the vibrators and destroyed them.
And so, the sad, weird chapter of the Hello Kitty vibrator is at an end. The last of the Kitty vibes are gone, so now what will the world do for wacky comic -- and sexual -- relief?
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baby : CL16 ☆
summary: y/n horner has dropped a new single. its a sexy and fun song. but y/n had broken up 4 years ago, and since then there was one superhit album with a sad and shady vibe. new year, new y/n? or new man? let's find out.
(charles leclerc × singer!reader)
trigger warnings: sexual intendos, typos (tried my best to not make any)
face claim: barbara palvin
read more under the cut!
y/nusername has posted!
hi, lovers. i know its been quite a while since you've heard from me but hey! i'm back and my single "baby" is dropping on friday, 8/12/23. stay tuned for more updates. love you all always, i thank each one of you as i wouldn't be here if it weren't for you guys 💋
liked by taylorswift, landonorris, charles_leclerc and 928,712,821 others
christianhorner proud of you, darling ❤️
- gerihalliwellhorner WE are proud of you (the spice girl inside me is squeaking)
landonorris GO BESTIE
- y/nusername ILY DUMBASS
carlossainz55 all the drivers can't wait for this! (we all are disgusted on the inside)
- y/nusername 🤭🤭
- estiebestieee GIRL WHAT DOES THAT MEAN
- y/nloverrr stop....DOES THAT MEAN THE DRIVERS HAVE HEARD THE SONG ALREADY
- pierregasly 🤐
y/nfann YOU LOOK SO PRETTY
paddockclubb y'all wondering if the drivers have heard the song when i'm out here questioning reality cos CHARLES LECLERC HAS LIKED THIS POST.
it was the end of season lunch and you were kind of nervous as you would finally be telling your parents about charles and you. your friends were thrilled but you just didn't know how your father would react.
the heavenly creatures and godly people had given you a blessing. BECAUSE NO WAY IN HELL YOUR FATHER KNEW ABOUT IT ALL ALONG?
"you aren't letting him in on any red bull secrets now, are you?" your father questioned you. and you replied right back, with mock seriousness. "you mean have i told him how max cuddles his cats and how checo never stops talking about mexican food? yes dad i've kept that a secret." your boyfriend lets out a chuckle as you finish your sentence, squeezing your thigh below the table.
"aww maxie you're a softie at heart" lando teases him as max glares at you playfully. the brunch was a success and you just couldn't wait to get back to the hotel with charles because, oh dear lord. he looked absolutely ravishing. divine. sublime even. and he knew what was on your mind, the way his hands kept brushing yours, his soft kisses when no one was looking. you felt it all.
y/nusername has posted!
fancy hotel but this is how we showed up 🤞🏼 liked by christianhorner, charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1 and 99,827 others.
landonorris oooh who's that hot man
- y/nusername carlossainz55 come get your child
- carlossainz55 my apologies
- carlaaaando EXACTLY WHO IS THAT MAN
charles_leclerc 🌟
y/nusername has liked this comment
- f1wags WTF ARE Y'ALL SEEING THIS.
- estiebestiee if y/n and charles are a thing. I'M NOT READY FOR THIS 🖐🏼
y/nloverr OK BUT THE UPGRADE THO. from that trash guy 4 years ago to charles mfkin leclerc 🙏🏼
it was the big day. your single was about to drop today and your boyfriend was lying down on your lap, telling you how he would LOVE to tell the world that the song was about him. you agreed, it was about him. he slowly got up and wrapped his arms around your waist, letting his hands slip under your shirt.
"aren't we getting cheeky now, mr leclerc?" you teased. "oh we are just getting started, baby" he mumbles as he kisses down your neck. and just like that, he made your big day much more special by his, let's say, needy touches.
y/nusername has posted!
"baby" out now on all platforms! enjoy streaming. sending kisses 💋 liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris, lewishamilton and 288,718,123 others.
y/nfannn "baby, baby, do i taste like candy, sugarcoated he says i'm the most sweet" UM GUYS????? I'M NOT OK 🖐🏼
landonorris great song ig 🙄
- y/nusername oh cmon we all know you love it
lewishamilton great job, sis. got a sick beat 🖤
y/nusername has liked this comment
f1wags GUYS. I'M 100% SURE THAT'S CHARLES' BACK.
- carlandooo RAH STOP I'M WEAK IN MY KNEES RN
y/nloverrr "i'm a handful but, that's what hands are for. pin me to the floor, treat it like its yours" SCREAMING YELLING KICKING MY FEET IN THE AIR GN. she ate that up 🙏🏼
charles_leclerc 🤭
charles_leclerc has posted!
"baby" is ab me. y'all can cry now 🤭 liked by y/nusername, arthur_leclerc, carlossainz55 and 287,112,123 others.
y/nusername i love you, baby.
- charles_leclerc NAH. i love you more.
- y/nusername shut up, i will kill every person who says against me, i love you more.
- charles_leclerc wow look at you making me all scared AND getting me horny at the same time.
landonorris UM. I DIDN'T NEED TO KNOW THAT.
pierregasly THERE ARE KIDS ON THIS APP.
maxverstappen1 why y'all acting like we didn't know since ages. anyways. *pretends to be shook* CONGRATS GUYS!
y/nleclercfan PARENTS 🤞🏼
lechairrr y/n basically told us how good charles is in bed by her song 😭
f1wags HAH. I KNEW IT. I SAW IT COMING BUT I'M STILL SO SHOOK RN?????
scuderiaferrari red looks good on you guys ❤️
the end ♡
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