#// i wish i knew js then i would probably spend half a year trying to make a cutscene dialogue overlay generator

[m0e-ru]

boy who is so obsessed with themself they view their neocities and click around for the past forty minutes

[chocolatemillkk]

Being Yours (JS)

Request 1: hey can i request one where it's not a happy ending like with a breakup and a sad ending and they don't get together + Joe

Request 2: Joe with the line Maybe I'm too busy being yours to fall for somebody new from do I wanna know? thank you!

It was hard for Joe to get over her. It was impossible, even. It was like telling a fish to swim out of water and expect it to survive-it just couldn't happen. Y/N and Joe had been an item for more than a couple years and none of them saw the split coming. It was just suddenly, a comment about being unhappy and the revelation that the two of them together weren't as happy as they used to be. So they'd split mutually so they could work on themselves-figure out what made them happy separately. If things were meant to be, they would find their ways back. At least that's what Joe kept telling himself.

Zoe had told him time and time again to move on: it had been a year, Y/N was trying to move on, Joe was wasting his life away waiting for a single moment from his fantasies where she would come running back saying how much she needed him. But Joe just couldn't do it. He was still hers, his heart was still hers to take.

It would have been their three year anniversary today, Joe thinks darkly. Joe had planned a picnic for their second anniversary and it had rained that day which had ruined all his plans. They ended up having a picnic on their living room floor surrounded by candles and Joe had sworn he would make their third year anniversary the best one yet. When they split, Joe thought Y/N and him would have reconciled by their anniversary-he had made a promise with Zoe that he would move on if they weren't back together by then. But he wasn't ready to move on despite his promise.

Joe's phone continues to blow up throughout the day, his friends and family checking up on him knowing how significant April 4 was for him but he leaves his phone on silent and curls up in bed with the curtains closed.

Y/N and him had met at a music festival. It was a smaller show with a lot of Youtubers present and Y/N was enthusiastically singing along to an Arctic Monkeys cover when Joe noticed her. Her hair was up in those half-bun hairstyles and each time her head bobbed, it threatened to spill over.

He had decided to be proactive and buy her a beer. Walking up to her, he prayed she didn't already have a boyfriend.

"I can't tell whether I like your performance or the actual performance on stage better," Joe had said during a break.

"Oh gosh was I that obnoxious?" She tucks her hair behind her ears. "I get a little carried away."

"Not at all," Joe had admired the way she was so open. "I actually bought you a beer to encourage you to continue."

The first time he heard that laugh of hers, Joe felt butterflies-he'd never felt butterflies for anything in his life. She graciously accepts the cup from his hand.

"You're Joe Sugg right?" She asks.

"I am," Joe was surprised she knew him. "And you're...?"

"Y/N, I'm a Youtuber too. I've seen you around at a few events in London before but I've always been too shy to approach you."

"I wish you would have," Joe tells her. "I feel like we would have gotten on if we did meet then."

"How about right now?" Y/N tilts her head, a smile playing at her lips.

"Well we're at a festival, open sky above us and music playing all around us-it's probably the perfect place to finally meet you." Joe's aware he's laying it on thick but this girl seemed to bring out the cheesy in him.

"Aw," she laughs. "I think so too."

They'd spent the rest of the day together much to the grumbling of Joe's friends. They took photos, laughed over drinks, and sang madly to the bands playing. By the end of the night, Y/N rests her sun-kissed cheeks on his shoulder while her hands loop around his arm.

"I don't think I want to stop hanging out with you," Y/N had mumbled, slightly tipsy but mostly honest.

Joe had felt the stirring again, he knew he was falling faster than gravity made it possible but there was no point in putting his hands out to catch his fall. The momentum was just too fast.

"I'd love to spend every day with you," Joe had untangled his arms and wrapped them around her waist. "What do you think?"

"Hm," she pretends to look pensive. "I can't think of anything to say." She giggles after a moment. "I think I'm all sung out and talked out. I'm having a massive brain fart trying think of something witty to say."

"Then don't say anything," Joe had said simply, before leaning down to kiss her. It was slow and sweet and lingering; even after they broke apart their eyes remained closed not wanting to forget the moment.

Joe remembers that first kiss and it kills him how something so sweet could hurt so much. He tries to remember their last kiss, it must have been a quick goodbye kiss because he couldn't remember it. Sometimes he wished he could forget the first one too.

That was why Joe found himself drunk and making his way to Y/N's flat that night. He'd driven past it multiple times in the first couple months they broke up, going out of his way just in case he'd catch her just to act surprised that he's bumped into her. But that never happened and Joe had resorted to creeping her on social media instead. He could tell from her videos after the break-up that she was unhappy for a while. Now, Joe couldn't bring himself to watch them. He just opted for staring at the thumbnails until he chickened out and closed the tab. Maybe the thought of her moving on stopped him from watching her videos. Maybe he didn't want to face the facts.

Joe presses any combination of numbers, hoping to catch anybody even though it was 1 in the morning.

"What?" A man's voice snipes. "Who is this?"

"I forgot my keys I'm sorry," Joe slurs. "Please open."

"Just this once mate," the man buzzes and Joe tries the handle. After some grunting he manages to twist the door and open it, struggling to remember Y/N's floor.

Outside her door, Joe tries to collect himself. He straightens out his jacket and combs through his hair with his fingers. Clearing his throat, he knocks. Not hearing anything, he knocks again.

"Joe?" The door opens and Y/N's bare face looks tired and confused. "Joe what's happened?"

She reaches out to catch his stumbling body but as soon as he rights himself, she lets go.

"Y/N," Joe slurs. "How are you?"

"Joe...I-I'm alright. Do you want to...?" She opens the door wider and Joe notices the pair of pyjamas she wears that she got from Zoe last Christmas. She looked perfect in them.

"Sorry for coming so late," Joe tries to convince her he wasn't as drunk as he actually was but she sees past him as always.

"It's one in the morning. Sit. I'm getting you water."

She takes her time getting it, giving him a wary once-over when she hands it over.

"Joe why are you here?" She leans again the wall as he drinks.

"Don't you remember today?" Joe asks, feeling betrayed she didn't remember.

Her eyebrows furrow before shooting up. "Oh Joe," she sighs. "Please don't tell me it's because of our-"

"Anniversary," Joe tries to say but mostly spit flies out. "Anniversary." Joe tries again. "Did you forget?"

Y/N massages her temples and Joe feels like an accordian that's left unfolded and drooping as he realises Y/N wasn't feeling the same things he was feeling. Seeing her, knowing deep down she really had moved on just added to Joe's despair.

"You don't care," Joe says quietly, his voice flattened out.

"That's not really fair Joe it's been almost a year since we broke up." Y/N hugs her frame. "I care about you-of course I do and I-I hate seeing you like this...Joe what happened? We both split knowing it was for the best, so we could find our happiness. We were supposed to move on!"

"How could I move on from you? How could we move on from what we had?" Joe demands, getting up from his seat but immediately balancing himself on the tabletop.

"Joe what we had-or what we had in the end was a weak attempt at how happy we were in the beginning. It was like we were shoddy actors trying to play a part, why don't you remember that?" Y/N moves away to the living room and Joe follows.

"But I love you," Joe knew how he sounded but he didn't care. He had to try, it was his last ditch attempt at getting the girl back.

"Don't do this to me!" Y/N throws up her hands and that's when Joe sees it. A sweater on the couch, a photo near the TV...all the signs were there.

"Who is he?" Joe asks.

"Who's who?" Y/N demands. "What are you on about?"

"You moved on, who is he?" Joe repeats.

Y/N crosses her arms and she doesn't have to say a single thing because Joe could read her like a children's book. The D of her mouth and the O in her eyes and the worry lines that showed up between her eyebrows.

"Do you love him?" Joe asks quietly and Y/N's eyes begin to tear. It wasn't fair of Joe to behave like this-Y/N had every right to move on. But he'd held on to her-the hope of her-for so long that something snaps. Joe turns around and lands a painful punch against the wall. The physical release wasn't enough so he punches it again, then lands a kick, another punch, and finally rests his head against the wall.

"Love," Joe says against the wall. By now he doesn't care that he's crying or that his knuckles are bleeding. They were nothing compared to the pain he felt inside. It was like the ocean he was expected to flop back into, find another fish in, was drowing him. It was filling his lungs and making him question why he was in it in the first place.

"I'm sorry," Y/N whispers and when Joe looks at her he immediately fills with regret. Joe had never gotten violent in his life and the frightened look on Y/N's face is one he wants to erase from his memories. She clutches her arms and tears stain her cheeks.

"I'll go," Joe says, suddenly sober. What he wanted to add was that he was sorry too. He wanted to wrap her up in his arms and show it.

"H-how have you still-I don't understand why you haven't moved on Joe," Y/N's voice is laced with pity and sadness that Joe didn't need. "It's been a year."

"Maybe I was too busy being yours to fall for somebody new," Joe answers truthfully. "I don't know why I came here. I'm sorry for-for all of this."

Joe moves towards the front and Y/N doesn't follow. He takes his time reaching the door and before he leaves he glances back one last time. Y/N stands leaning against the wall, she fiddles with the necklace she always wore while she watches him go.

"Please take care of yourself," her five words carry more weight to them as she says them with a frown on her face.

"Yeah," Joe answers. "Maybe I'll see you around."

"Yeah," Y/N attempts a smile but it just looks like sadness painted into a grimace.

Joe closes the door gently behind him, like it would erase the violence of the moment before and the violence that brews in his heart. His emotions collide into each other and his legs give out by the time he walks outside. Unfazed by the stray passer-by, Joe cries into his knees as the wind nips at his exposed ears and until his chest feels as hollow as his heart. When he gets back up, his limbs cracking with stiffness, a fresh gust of wind blows past him and he stands still while breathing it in.

Seeing Y/N didn't end the way he thought but it may have given him the closure he needed. Maybe. For now, Joe couldn't quite feel his limbs neither could he really feel his emotions. For now, that's what he would work to figure out. The rest would come eventually.

[savannahjanisxo]

boy, oh boy have I neglected posting this concert experience story (3 ½ months overdue yike) for the people who probably could care less about it, but it is finally here, & it is v v v extensive as it includes basically every detail I can recall accurately.

Here ya go, curious cats:

I went to the show in Santa Ana, CA on March 5th. I got to the venue maybe 20 or 30 minutes after doors opened, so the openers were already in the middle of their set. I dragged my older guy cousin w/ me (since my sister was doing a photoshoot in San Diego that night + the next day), & during the opener’s set, he pushed me to the front of the crowd since he knew how long I had been waiting to see hippo. Then they came out & did their thing, & holy shit. Okay, it was so worth waiting almost 2 years. Their set was so fucking surreal; I may or may not have almost cried.. Also in the middle of their set, some guy pushed to the front to let Jake take a hit off a joint, & it was p iconic lol.

After the show, the crowd waited like 5-10 minutes to disperse due to the hope of a possible encore. I then got merch & waited inside the venue for maybe 15 minutes since the last time I was at the Observatory, the band I saw met fans inside the venue, but after seeing most of the fans walking outside, I followed.. Also b/c they kicked everyone out lol.

There were maybe 60-70 (possibly even more) fans outside waiting in the parking lot for the guys, but hippo had chosen to wait everyone out until there were 30 fans max which was 1 - 1 ½ hours later. During that time, I made a few new friends since my cousin decided to just wait inside of his car for me to do my thing.

(Whistler left right after the show to spend time w/ his family, sooo y'know.. I didn’t get to meet him.)

The first boy to come out was Nathan, but he stopped to smoke a cigarette w/ security lol. We were on our way to meet him half way, but we stopped when we saw he was busy (DON’T BOTHER THEM IF THEY SEEM BUSY OKAY). We then just waited for another one of them to come out or until he was finished.

Jake:

Jake came out next, so we went over to him to take pictures & whatnot. I’ve been promising him a lame dad shirt for the past two years, & I still have yet to provide. I apologized for that as we were about to take our picture, & he simply replied, “aww, next time!” whilst rubbing my arm. Not to be dramatic, but Jake is pure sunshine. I wish I had more time to chat w/ him, but so many others were trying to speak to him as well, so after the pictures, the girls & I were off to the next boy.

Nathan:

We went to Zach since Nathan was still smoking, but everything w/ Zach will be addressed last since that was most of it.. SO after seeing Zach the first time around in the night, we went to Nathan, & my conversation w/ him is kind of a blur, but basically the gist & a few specifics: he called himself a whore (I briefly explain here for those wanting further explanation), he told me to get out of California, & I called him a hippie which he asked me to explain myself, but he was literally rolling a joint as he was giving his “stop being on your phones, go outside, & interact w/ your friends” spiel. (One of the girls took a snap video of him, & in it he says “like at the same I want the ability to be able to be here now, so.. that’s what cigarettes are all about.” C’mon hippie sticker boy, admit it.) I also brought up his twitter & how this one time late at night, & he was the only one of the boys awake, so he was bored & asked to be sent poetry. I sent a realist suggestive poem about me “doing homework when it should be you” (my recent works are definitely more tasteful & not that trashy.. but sticker boy told me the other night (in direct reference to my previous statement) that “trash is & will always be better than we think.” sooo maybe he enjoyed it? I don’t know about that cryptic boy), & he told me he didn’t remember. Then he asked me what year this happened, & I told him it happened in 2015 to which he said, “I was a different man then” lol okay, child. Little something about sticker: he comes off as a very serious person when you speak to him, but he isn’t at all. Although, he is very formal. When I first went up to him, he went in for a handshake, but I had been waiting too long for this to be a handshake; I needed it to be a hug. We then introduced ourselves.. Ooooh. I also talked to Nathan about his sister, Madeline, b/c she’s been following me on Instagram for a couple years (I didn’t even follow her first lol), & oml the look on his face when I told him that. He rolled his eyes & said, “ohhh, Madeline.” It was hilarious (love you, Maddie). Overall, we just had a 5-10(??) minute conversation about life (in the midst of the conversation, someone was pulling out of the parking lot blasting one of their songs (can’t remember which one.. violet maybe?), & Nathan yelled, “turn that shit off.” It was iconic).. Then I went back over to Zach.

Zach:

Background info:

About a week before the show, I was tweeting this boy so much? Within a week probably 30 of my tweets were liked by him; it was so excessive, & soz to anyone who was following me during that time b/c yikes. Anyway, basically the main part of it was that we were finally going to fight, & the whole Zach only liking tweets & fighting has been a running joke since 2015 okay, so this isn’t new. He also agreed to “match” outfits w/ me, hence the denim shirt over his sweatshirt.

(You can peep the embarrassing twitter thread here. Some tweets contain their own threads too js lol.)

At the actual show:

When Z finally came out, the girls I was w/ & I booked it over there, & he was chatting w/ some people, & he talks for a long time which is really nice, but also time consuming y’know. (Also oml okay as we were waiting for them to finish their conversation, this bih smiled, & I kid you not, my weak ass squealed a bit. Like those dimples? Are you fucking kidding me?) Anyway, when our turn finally came to, I went first since we had a whole plan going. It was a thing where I was going to greet him by saying something vaguely rude, so he’d be aware of the whole fighting thing b/c if I greeted him like I actually would have w/ the whole “hey, how are you,” bringing up the fight would’ve been a tad awkward, thus “Zach, you ass” was born.

(You can watch that on my twitter here. It’s also part of the thread, but eh y’know.)

Subsequently after the denim shirt talk (the video cuts right before this, but he actually apologized for not bringing his other denim shirt, & I told him that I was just happy he even brought/wore one b/c I asked, & he said, “yeah, well thanks.” what an awkward angel), I called him out about some twitter things such as why he doesn’t reply, & he said, “I just like b/c it’s like a binary sort of thing.” Then I told him that I actually would have brought him candy in which this bitch smugly replied, “maybe I don’t like candy.” Uhm this boy liked the tweet, & if it is actually a binary thing, he is indicating that he does like candy smh. Anyway, I asked, “what about donuts or something?” This bih then decided to sass me aGAIN by saying, “Whistler likes donuts,” & I was so done. BOY, NO SHIT. EVERYONE & THEIR MOTHER KNOWS WHISTLER LOVES DONUTS HOLY FUCK. I WAS USING THAT AS AN EXAMPLE FOR A SUGGESTION. Ugh then he said that I should bring him fruit, so I asked which is his favorite, & I thought to myself, “he better not say mango,” & HE DID. I was disgusted, everyone else was disgusted b/c of my reaction, & it was a mess. Then we continued to talk about fruit for a few more minutes (it was a long fruit convo) such as the correct way to eat grapefruit (peel the skin & put sugar on it), pomegranate being bomb, & yet another opposing opinion which was on putting tajín on fruit (Z hasn’t had it, so he believes that “salty things don’t belong on fruit.. that’s for pretzels” ..tajín is chili powder that tastes like candy, & it is amazing, especially on watermelon). Then I said bye to him after we took our pictures, helped the girls I was w/ take their pictures, & we went over to Nathan (which I already went over).

Second time around talking to my mango bitch: So after talking to Nathan, I went back over to Zach alone since the girls I was w/ decided to leave (it was maybe 12:15 AM at this point, & it was Sunday night, soooo y’know). My phone had also died when I was waiting to talk to Zach the first time, but then it came back on by itself when I was waiting to talk to him the second time. It was living on the edge, so I ran back to my cousin’s car to get my portable charger (we had parked right by the bus in the very front of the venue, so it was very convenient), but tHAT WAS ALSO ON THE EDGE. I went back in line, & I was the last person to talk to Zach, so it was a long time spent. We said hi again, & we took so. many. pictures. These were all snap filter ones, & we did that for a few minutes. Okay, so my bitch ass oml I made him retake a few, & at one point, I actually said, “ew, I don’t like this; we have to retake it,” & hE LAUGHED AT ME, & THEN HE MIMICKED ME. I can’t believe. Ugh okay, but a part of this was that we were going to do the infamous face swap filter, but it was unavailable, & we realized it was on the picture face swap instead right as it was finishing loading, & we both said, “wait, this is the picture one” & almost switched w/ the picture I had just taken w/ Jake. Then I asked him how tall he was, & he said, “I don’t know, 6′1?” I told him that I think he’s def 6′2. I also asked him if he was sick since I noticed he had been coughing a bit throughout the night, & he said he was, & I just kNEW he would probably get me sick too, & wow what a surprise, he did. Afterwards, I had him record a video for my best friend who couldn’t come (she started liking hippo when I did, but she is not as present in the “fandom” anymore), & I asked him if I should use the flash or not b/c I did not want to blind him w/o warning, he said whatever I want is fine, so I chose to do it w/o the flash, but ahh okay, I kept having to wave him around to try to be in better lighting, & I felt so bad. Then finally we said our goodbyes after he noticed that I was actually shivering, & he said, “well, it’s cold. I gotta go get warm; you gotta go get warm. It was so nice to see you,” & we hugged, but then we ended up walking in the same direction. As we finally broke away & I was almost to the car, he calls over & says, “I’m still only going to like your tweets,” & I deadass call back over & say, “you are annoying as fuck.” 

Post related events:

So when I got home from the show, I took to twitter to express my love & annoyance for such mango boy to acknowledge which included me tweeting him less than an hour after I left saying that he’s cute, & t’was a good fight. Also the next day (the day they had their second Conan performance), I tagged him in the comments of the first post I made of one of our pictures calling him out for not liking it & that we actually have to fight again if he doesn’t like it, & this child decided to like my cOMMENT INSTEAD. Then I commented again explaining that I was meaning the picture & not the comment, & he liked that one too. About a week later, I had told my mom & her boyfriend about the whole Zach thing, & I tweeted something my mom’s boyfriend said about me fucking up by not kissing Z (which would’ve been highly inappropriate wtf why would I??), & he liked that tweet too lmao. I was mortified. He’s liked some more stuff within that same period to now, but I cannot recall if they’d actually add anything to this?

Okay also disclaimer: I do not hate Zach, & he know this. It’s just how we are (which are two v extra people).. but he is def the bitch in our relationship thanks.