rock-n-roll-fantasy - Tumblr blog

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Dame Maggie Smith

1934-2024

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old discworld memes

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I love rereading the watch books with my mom cos she gets SO mad at the mean descriptions of Nobby. Every Single Time. I'll be reading out a passage where he's compared to a monkey or something and she'll gasp so indignantly and at the very least comment something like "that's so cruel!". The worse the insult, the longer the speech. "Oh my god, why would he [Terry] be so mean!! Nobby doesn't deserve this. What did he ever do to him? Nobby is a PERSON there's nothing wrong with him!!" ESPECIALLY in night watch when it's about baby Nobby. She gets up in arms over baby Nobby. The moment Carcer threatened him, she (extremely gentle and nonviolent person) without hesitation decided the man was irredeemable and deserved an immediate painful death.

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The thing about Terry Pratchett is the stories are so good and the jokes are so funny and the incisive quotes are so memorable and humane that sometimes it's easy to forget that the man could just... put together a sentence like no one else.

I remember the first time I read Thud the phrase "hell went for a stroll with its sleeves rolled up" took me out at the knees. It's just... Perfect. It captures exactly what it needs to capture, conjures what it needs to conjure. Does it concisely and eloquently. It's just... Perfect.

And every time I reread it, it takes me out again.

Man, Pratchett could write.

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i don't think there's any actual good reason for a modern discworld au (a roundworld au, if you will) EXCEPT for whimsy. i say this because im thinking about a modern vetinari who's obsessed with all the latest technology driving a stupid fancy black car and constantly being like "alexa, detain that man" and playing crosswords on his cell phone. i can't imagine vimes as a modern policeman but i CAN imagine him living in sybil's crazy old mansion and going to the gas station for cigarettes and wearing the same pair of jeans for the rest of his life. what about monstrous regiment just being a group of trans teenagers experiencing the horrors of high school (jackrum is their gym teacher). brutha being a tiktok famous prophet. modern goth adora belle dearheart in platform boots. moist von lipwig playing mario kart. and also it would be really funny if vetinari was still an assassin

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getting back into the swing of it

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Every Discworld book opens with the same paragraph about how “This is the Discworld, on the shell of the star-turtle A’Tuin, swimming endlessly through space,” until The Truth when Terry threw up his hands and went “If you don’t know by this point, I can’t —ing help you” and never brought it up again

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Anyway, Terry Pratchett invented the Our Blessed Homeland / Their Barbarous Wastes meme, almost 25 years before Tom Gould got around to it

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Alex Turner of Arctic Monkeys performs on stage during the Outside Lands Music Festival 2011 on August 13, 2011 in San Francisco, California.

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vetinari’s dubious sexuality being a genuine puzzler for the citizens of his city……..the bit in unseen academicals where glenda is like “no one knows what side of the bed vetinari got up on. or even if he went to bed at all” vs. the two seconds in the truth where i was convinced that had de worde not stopped him his neighbor would’ve fully called vetinari a slur

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"This is Ankh-Morpork, you know. We've got extra pronouns here."

GNU Terry Pratchett

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Most typical fantasy dragons are huge, powerful things. Discworld is hilarious for essentially making them this but reptillian:

They also explode and die when they are upset/frightened. Which is uhhh... a lot of the time. Fucking pathetic beasts

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I'm so so enraptured with Vetinari's crossword obsession. He's so fucking weird and grumpy about it and I want to either marry him or put him under a microscope. Maybe both.

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I love reading Discworld books bc when having a philosophical/political discussion with someone, I can crack my book open and read a relevant quote from it like it's the goddamn Bible.

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Canon scene from "Going Postal"

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Dragon babysitter

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Weird fucking thought (because my college projects are killing me and I am about to lose my shit, well I am now actually hence this lmao) but I was thinking about when Feanor threatened Fingolfin with a sword and remembered that one post saying that if Feanor didn't bring a sword, Fingolfin would have thrown hands and they would brawl lmao and I was struck with a thought that since Fingolfin was praised more for his physical prowess (yummy), a single sucker punch from him would've knocked Feanor out and envisioning that made me laugh so hysterically that I am crying too hard. I know people are going to be pissed because Feanor is their blorbo dad but whatever, imagining him lying on the floor in front of many people after that one punch (not even his peacock helmet could protect him) was too much for me. Fingolfin would've gotten in trouble but like fuck it that was too funny. Anyway, Swan Boats Forever lol fuck those jewels.

ANON HELP i just imagined it. lbr if both of them were unarmed feanor would get his ass handed to him -- and as funny as that image is, what's really getting me is the thought of how he would react to it. just imagine the expression of rage and mortification and disbelief on his face, i bet that sight alone would make the ensuing several-day lecture from the valar worth it in fingolfin's books. and i mean, there's only one brother here that morgoth is canonically stated to fear and it's not feanor

and you're completely correct about the last sentence! swanships >>>>>> silmarils