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🍐 The Cactaceae. v.1. Washington: Carnegie Institution of Washington, 1919-1923.

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🍐 The Cactaceae. v.1. Washington: Carnegie Institution of Washington, 1919-1923.

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On this day in 2020,

I wrote in my journal, about my ex. She had just come back from a solo camping trip. She lied and said she had bad service, just spent a lot of time thinking, communing with nature (or whatever). When she arrived back home, she begrudgingly gave me a sweaty hug and kiss, took a shower, and spent hours alone in her room, door closed. this is what I wrote: "Don't expect anything from her. She's doing what she wants. She wrote me that she loves me and all that, so even when she literally hasn't spoken to me in days, I just have to believe it." Later on, weeks or months later, she stated (as though we all knew it) that the camping trip was critical for her and LadyB to get together. They spend the whole time together, virtually. (Note to self - write about her odd polyam behavior)

uh...ok.

it's a shame she decided to accumulate so much deception. She and I agreed to "open and honest communication" but at some point in late 2019, she...reneged on that. I don't know what happened, and she definitely didn't tell me things had changed...It was up to me to figure it out.

Looking back, her emotional immaturity (or the ability to feel, then identify, then communicate an emotion) that was prevalent throughout our relationship was probably the death of it, too.

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Femme Fatale Guide: Top "Glow Up" Tips & Habits To Become The Best Version of Yourself

Prioritize the Holy Trinity: Nutrition, Movement, & Sleep. Following a whole-foods, plant-based diet with vegetables and/or fruit at every meal and limiting processed foods is one of the simplest ways to improve your overall health. Drink plenty of water, have any necessary supplements (like vitamin B12, vitamin D, omega 3s, etc.), and reduce your consumption of sugary, alcoholic, or caffeine-loaded beverages. Try to incorporate at least 30 minutes of walking and/or a simple 15-20 workout into your everyday routine. Make getting a full night's rest (usually 7-9 hours for most people) a non-negotiable in your life.

Practice Radical Self-Acceptance. Fully embrace your personal values. Get comfortable with your authentic desires. Define and set goals for yourself in every area of your life.

Nourish Your Body, Mind, and Spirit Consistently. Eat a healthful diet (enough food without overstuffing yourself), sleep and move enough throughout the day, and continue learning and educating yourself on current events, your industry/career field, art, culture, history, world languages, etc. Practice mindfulness and self-care activities. Honoring your sexual needs. Giving yourself at least one rest/reset day per week.

Cultivate Sustainable (and Personally-Fulfilling) Routines. Your sleep schedule, work/school schedule, workout schedule throughout the week, social and self-care time, date nights, time for your hobbies, errands, cleaning, and relaxation. Make appointments with yourself to empower you to fulfill all your daily tasks and activities to ensure you can work and play without burning yourself out in the process.

Set Boundaries. With your friends, family, work-life/professional network, romantic and sexual partners, and yourself. Understand your emotional, physical, and energetic limitations. Communicate them clearly, compassionately, and unapologetically. Cut toxic people out of your life. Avoid codependency like the plague. Nurture your healthy and supportive interdependent relationships regularly.

Learn What You Enjoy. Ensure To Incorporate These Products, Routines, and Relationships Into Your Day. It can be a piece of dark chocolate and a favorite T.V. show, a long evening phone call with a loved one, a hot bubble bath, or any other small luxury that gives you genuine pleasure and adds some necessary joy to your day.

Check In With Yourself Regularly. Pivot When Necessary. Self-improvement, goal setting, relationship building, and cultivating unshakeable self-love/life satisfaction takes time, experimentation, trial and error, and tons of self-reflection before you get it right in any area of your life. Be honest with yourself on what's work, what's not, where to remain consistent, and what areas of your life would benefit from a change.

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by Molly Buford

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where's my sapphic FWB?

There was this local, sex-positive girl...lesbian, knows I'm polyam. I flirted my DAMNEDEST and she flirted back. She was out of town and I said "text me to meet up when you get back in town" and she left me hanging. She and I would chat on the timeline but she just never got back to me. She liked my posts, and she even posted about feeling bummed that people didn't want to be friends with her. Umm... you left me on read. (To be continued)

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What we're all singing this summer

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My wish for my ex-wife

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it's kinda awesome - everyone in my constellation is a different gender.

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Keep my name out of your mouth

"You can ask my ex wife, I was doing such-and-such" blah blah blah Yes, sure they *can* ask me, but are you prepared for YOUR name to come out of my mouth? Are you prepared for what else about you might spill out? Didn't think so. Keep my name out of your mouth.

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First post - good morning.