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hype

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mood. 

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overthinking thoughts before i pass out. 

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i feel so sluggish and semi sick. coughing like a coal miner and wanting to be at home. but i have to be a grown up and do work shit like going to a meeting and attempt to do errands. will even do errands? probably not, but hey, at least i thought about it. (but i know that doesn’t count but it makes me feel better about my life choices regarless) 

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Just because you took longer than others doesn’t mean you failed. Remember that.

Unknown (via onlinecounsellingcollege)

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i need to be my person in my bed, like, all the time. smell their face and tell  me tomorrow will be better

my thoughts, oct. 19 2019. 12:12am 

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hahaha. too relatable 

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https://iglovequotes.net/

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Practical Tips for Coping with Anxiety

According to Dr T.A. Richards, we can stop thoughts that lead to anxiety by consciously replacing them by more rational thoughts like the following:

When anxiety is near:

1. I’m going to be all right. My feelings are not always rational. I’m just going to relax, calm down, and everything will be all right.

2. Anxiety is not dangerous — it’s just uncomfortable. I am fine; I’ll just continue with what I’m doing or find something more active to do.

3. Right now I have some feelings I don’t like. They are really just phantoms, however, because they are disappearing. I will be fine.

4. Right now I have feelings I don’t like. They will be over with soon and I’ll be fine. For now, I am going to focus on doing something else around me.

5. That picture (image) in my head is not a healthy or rational picture. Instead, I’m going to focus on something healthy like _________________________.

6. I’ve stopped my negative thoughts before and I’m going to do it again now. I am becoming better and better at deflecting these automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) and that makes me happy.

7. So I feel a little anxiety now, SO WHAT? It’s not like it’s the first time. I am going to take some nice deep breaths and keep on going. This will help me continue to get better.”

When preparing for a stressful situation

1. I’ve done this before so I know I can do it again.

2. When this is over, I’ll be glad that I did it.

3. The feeling I have about this trip doesn’t make much sense. This anxiety is like a mirage in the desert. I’ll just continue to walk forward until I pass right through it.

4. This may seem hard now, but it will become easier and easier over time.

5. I think I have more control over these thoughts and feelings than I once imagined. I am very gently going to turn away from my old feelings and move in a new, betterdirection.

When feeling overwhelmed

1. I can be anxious and still focus on the task at hand. As I focus on the task, my anxiety will go down.

2. Anxiety is a old habit pattern that my body responds to. I am going to calmly and nicely change this old habit. I feel a little bit of peace, despite my anxiety, and this peace is going to grow and grow. As my peace and security grow, then anxiety and panic will have to shrink.

3. At first, my anxiety was powerful and scary, but as time goes by it doesn’t have the hold on me that I once thought it had. I am moving forward gently and nicely all the time.

4. I don’t need to fight my feelings. I realize that these feelings won’t be allowed to stay around very much longer. I just accept my new feelings of peace, contentment, security, and confidence.

5. All these things that are happening to me seem overwhelming. But I’ve caught myself this time and I refuse to focus on these things. Instead, I’m going to talk slowly to myself, focus away from my problem, and continue with what I have to do. In this way, my anxiety will have to shrink away and disappear.

Source: http://www.anxietynetwork.com/helpcope.html

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truth. 

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i need this...

7 things to remind yourself of every day …

1. I am unique

2. I am worthwhile

3. I am worthy

4. I can change

5. I can make it

6. I can succeed

7. I can be happy and have a great life.

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i just wanted to be loved. and to be loved back.

I know I have abandon this page. Checking in every few years you would with a distant relative. Embarrassingly enough - a lot of the post were about the rise and fall of my relationship with my former partner, Charles. Saying that relationship was a big mistake was an understatement. But him leaving me was the gateway drug of me not giving a fuck about anybody. Or anything. 

I dated a lot of different people. I figured out what to get a guys attention and developed thick ass skin to deal with rejection and ghosting. Accepting that I am disposable. And how guys can just be disposable to me as well. Trying not to close, but getting sucked in. Giving myself away so freely and ending up empty handed. Left alone to pick up the pieces. 

Then I had to learn how to stop the cycle. Looking inside myself - what was I missing? What did I need to work on? Things I didn’t know about myself and wish I knew sooner. I felt misunderstood. Alone. Nobody had the time to sit my ass down and help me out. But who cares, at the end of the day - you die alone. You have to be responsible for yourself. Without that, you have nothing. I had to learn that the hard way - but at least better knowing this now at 28 than 65. 

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same

Our Amy 🌸

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via weheartit

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so i’ve been going back and forth

things have changed. my thoughts changed. i just need some stability. fuck, in two years i’m 30. 

but people say 30 is the new 20s. my hormone would disagree on that....