Four days back, I might’ve agreed. Now, not likely.
Till now, I have attended three unscheduled classes. I had to attend them because, education. My scheduled math test however, was postponed thrice since the morning. I have around 7 books on my reading list, a hell of a writer’s block, and a computer on a death bed. Yeah, it’s a decade and half old, dead pixels and all, so, RIP bitchy PC. Doesn’t even let me game, stupid PC. This is a rant about my busy day, yes. Don’t even ask me about tomorrow, oof. Quarantine time? A mess on my table and my state of peace, but yeah, fun.
Hit me up if you have a suggestion on some activity that I can do while my teacher yaps on about Physics. I need some new activities for myself.
(P.S : Yeah, this is a rant, I guess)
(P.S.P.P.S: I think that is said as ‘post script post post script’. Never mind. I repeated it being a rant twice. Cabin fever is driving me cray-cray.)
First of all, readers. I’ll thank you guys. i don’t get much attention on this blog, barely 5 and on a good day, 10 people like what I give out. And to say that my blogs do way better than my poems, that’s a different situation to think about on the whole. So, thank you, reader. The very fact that my blog is a small insignificant part of your day makes me happy. <3, ^_^. Do take a look at my poems on @osirisinavalley .
So, a void. An endless, unfathomable fall into darkness. We’ve all had this,haven’t we? Metaphorically, of course. (On a totally unrelated note, did any astronauts get trapped in a black hole?) How about when there is no one you can reach out to? Just alone, in a fall that goes on. There must be some point where we go kaboom and splotch on the ground. But if that’s not there, there’s no reaching the ground. But the anticipation of ending it stays on like a wildfire within yourself, the raw fear in letting go.
I had/have my own dark and painful days, thoughts and contemplation. I have those nights where I suffocate myself with tears and cry hours of my sleep away with agony. I don’t share this with everyone I know and I am putting this on an open forum, so I am kinda insecure about it. I don’t know where I am going with this. I didn’t plan this blog through. So, dunno. It’s kinda hard to keep someone happy while being down. Takes a lot of efforts, I know and I live for that. A smile on another face. To boil it down, you never know what’s going on in the other person’s life. Just try to keep someone happy. Someone will return the favor.
The void, well…I still don’t know the way out. I’ve written my mind on it in a poem. Probably will post it soon. Take care, people.
(P.S: I know, this blog is pretty pointless. It might be off my page in a few days. Never mind, I am having an UGH Phase alone.)
People of Tumblr, if you are reading this, I have got (read: given birth to) a wonderful and beautiful entity. Whom you ask? Let me introduce you to her. Her name is Drachma, and she is a money plant. Yes, isn’t she cute??
She is the aftermath of multiple breakdowns in the past few days. Yes, i am proud of her. But, I am a zero at parenting and plants. So, help me out here and send your suggestions on how I can help Drachma grow into a beautiful and wonderful plant. Look at her, shining and dazzling under the sunshine. Oof.
So I got tagged to write the last thing I did and am suposed to tag some one elce to do the same. I cheated and wrote the last thing I had a lot of fun with.
So, a busy schedule wasn’t enough for me to keep everything systematic and in order. My life is basically a Domino effect at the point. One teacher thinks she’ll teach for 15 more minutes, and basically I end up getting pushed down late for the next consecutive classes. I don’t know, honestly, time is no more during the quarantine. Relatable? I know. In spite of that, what did I do?
That’s right, I started to learn Japanese. Right now, having fun with the greeting phrases, teaching my mom and laughing at our pronunciation. Also, thanks to Takumi from this YT channel, great Japanese calligraphy, guys, just oof, so good! I learnt my Hiragana from him. I tried once, wrote it obnoxiously big and relatively small every other letter, contemplated my decision got some motivation, thanks to my boo, and I set off again! If there is anything I learnt from her, I would say, colours are awesome to use. Not an artistic person, people, but I TRIED MY BEST!
I don’t know about the colours but I damn sure know that they’re better written this time. I gotta remember every phonetic syllable to its letter and keep practising. English, German, Sanskrit, Hindi, (Kannada, Tamil, Malayalam)* and adding one more language as we go ahead, people!
()*- I gotta learn the writing and reading parts of these languages, but I can speak and understand!