lustandlove-blog1

[lustandlove-blog1]

He let his head slightly fall to the back exposing his Adam’s apple. He took a deep breath, his naked chest rose and then fell. She was sitting right next to him covered by the sheets observing the one she had shared her bed with for the past few months. ‘What’s wrong?’, he asked breaking the silence that always filled the room after they’ve revealed everything that was hidden beneath their clothes. ‘Nothing.’, she quickly answered. ‘Why are you staring at me then?’ He turned around to her. 'I think,’ she paused looking him in the eyes. 'I guess’, she paused again while licking her lips, a habit she had evolved over the years. 'When you first kissed me and told me that you would like to take me home with you, I said yes because yes, I was lonely and didn’t want to be alone that night and your mouth tasted so good, your body was so inviting and I just wanted someone to wake up to.’ She lost focus with his eyes. Now looking at the wall. 'But you’re not like all the other guys I slept with. You’re so different from them. We can just lie in bed and talk or cuddle without having to be naked, without having to be out of breath. You don’t make me feel like I owe you sex. And I don’t know, it feels so different but right.' She looked around the room while searching for the right words. 'The first guy I had sex with, his name was Alex, he made feel beautiful and loved when I needed it the most. And then I slept with him and everything became different. I guess he just wanted me naked. But I tried to make myself believe that it was wonderful that sleeping with him was wonderful even though something was always missing. I loved him. But he was not in love with me, he never was. Perhaps that’s the reason why I became so promiscuous. I blindly run from one bed to another searching something in the eyes of lovers.’ she made eye contact with him again. 'If you ask for a one-night-stand, all you get is one. Sometimes in the heat of the moment, I say I love you. But it’s always just the moment taking over my body because when I look in the eyes of the ones I let between my sheets, all I can see is lust. It’s never love. It was never love.’ Tears started to form in her eyes 'They didn’t deserve my body.’ She rubbed over her face with the insides of her hands. 'Why couldn’t you be my first one?’ He reached out his hand to wipe the tears away which were falling down. 'I know that sex doesn’t equal love but I guess I’m falling for you.’ After the words had left her mouth, her eyes filled with fear and she wished she could’ve taken them back. But her words were somewhere in the air making the few seconds that passed feel like an eternity. 'I should.’ she hesitated. ’…probably go. I’m sorry.’ 'No, don’t go.’ he said catching her wrist before she could stand up. 'I’m falling for you too. I cannot be your first one anymore but your last one. Please let me be your last one. I want to be your last one.’ and then he pressed her body against his making it impossible for her to leave. 'I won’t let you leave me now.’ He said with determination in his voice.'I won’t leave,’ she said with a small voice against his chest. 'not after you said this.

J.N.  (via lustforunspokenwords)

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Dance of wrath

Through the eyes of fire,

Clouds of wrath danced in the sky,

Portrayed a mundane satire,

Chanting the tale of a noxious lie.

A twitch on the scarred face,

Raging vermilion eyes,

An ugly beauty few could embrace,

Rage took an ironically peaceful disguise.

Birds sung together, a narrative,

Of truth's murder, antithesis' victory,

A war, dark and bigotedly lucrative,

Kill the organic, manifest the mystery.

A summer breeze dried the sweat,

The sun wore a xanthous visage,

Tout bien faced neglect,

Convinced the elite with an adage.

[lustandlove-blog1]

Could you be still for one moment

Let me lay my shoulder on you

The night is young and free

With all these young folks

Walking around like plain lovers

Never had this chance with you

But again it’s my chance to say it

I long for your skin and touch

Your hair scrape my face clean

And the scent coming while it sways

You hold my hands so tight

As if you’re slipping away too soon

But I guess it’s not what it used to be

Because you’re right here beside me

The evening is cold and becomes unfamiliar

Are all these stars become our witness tonight

These dim light coming from the busy headlights

Where again a remainder that we’re holding on

Into this love who I never call my own

I just hope and wish one day you’ll be mine

The need of you and my heart slowly bleeds

My thoughts wander all alone if you leave

I want to say something about my feelings

But you don’t see me as the love you breathe

I know this chance tonight will get me nowehere

You take my body for a hug that seems forever

Your skin to my skin erupts like an acid

And it will no longer be the same as I look at you

And this love will just fade like nothing ever stays

I’m not going anywhere else but this time I’ll let you go

-Chuck Akot

[lustandlove-blog1]

usurper

‘chaos isn’t a pit, it is a ladder and the climb is all there is’ so you climb it step by step with your devious mind in this world crazy for power you dive headfirst to reach the top trampling hearts and houses and friends and families you love in the most twisted ways not caring for collateral damages you cause more chaos just to climb it because you’ve been at the bottom looking up with people always looking at you down their nose when you want to understand people you play a little game you assume the worst because that’s what you are, what you have seen in a world crazy for power you make a name for yourself from the dust you are the usurper that could never be a king even after reaching the top (via justscribbledwords)

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That is part of the beauty of all literature. You discover that your longings are universal longings, that you’re not lonely and isolated from anyone. You belong.

F. Scott Fitzgerald (via perrfectly)

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#well

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Lure.

It was your lips, I think, That captivated me so Completely. All lush soft curves Tied with a Cupid’s bow The gods themselves Would fawn over & sigh at, My own chest aching For just one Touch. But, Those lips weren’t for me - Were never for me - You were a weapon Aimed at my soul; Merely a staged device Meant to allure My broken mind And ensnare my desperate senses Until I, the beguiler, Became the beguiled - Hopelessly entwined Within your devil’s snare In aquamarine flashes of Golden daydreams Tinged indigo with the sadness & Heartbreak Of nightmares. Those lips Spoke my name But once - And that single soft utterance Was the spell you cast To leave me bound, Ensorcelled, And alone. s. k. g.

[lustandlove-blog1]

I was doing a good job trying to get my smile again. Tried to laugh. And it was hard. But I did it. Little by little. Learning happiness again whenever seeing my friends happy and being appreciative. Dealt with things without forcing myself and without a personal cheerleader. Fought tears that tried to flow whenever things get too hard for me. Whispered comforting words like sweet lullabies to myself whenever I get tired, and even learned how to hold my breath for god-knows-how-long whenever I drown in my own thoughts. I tried getting by everyday. Looked at things where you lingered and smiled without breaking down on the inside. And happily looked at the sky again.

Until now.

Until you came back.

You came back, asking for another chance and everything I worked for the past 3 years came toppling down in an instant, like it wasn't even there.

Hah! Funny.

[lustandlove-blog1]

[lustandlove-blog1]

Come and rest your bones with me.

[lustandlove-blog1]

When you're alone do you think of me? Or am I just living in a big fantasy. Life has been a big lie, Just stop me, don't let me die. Give me a chance, let me try, Don't end up leaving me like the last piece of French fry. You said that you started believing forever after you met me, Then why does forever now seem obsolete? Let's take a walk down that beach, You're the reason I want to drink bleach. But you're also the one that stops me from doing that. Now I am sulking on the floor, drawing over the mat. So, go on honey, stop me there, Give me your I-love-you stare. And stop me from drowning in this quicksand. I am a flying airplane, be the airport where I can land.

[lustandlove-blog1]

You're my everything.

You keep me up day and night. Every second without your presence feels no less than a fight. I am the wrong that you have to right. Let's fly a blue kite. In the blue sky. I never told you a lie. You're my O2, my H20; without your presence, I might die. When you go at night, loneliness sets by. I try to be the best for you, trust me I try. But the distance makes me cry. I love you, my baby girl. With you, my world is always in a swirl.

[lustandlove-blog1]

I look towards the stars and what do I see? A sky of full of dismay that lacks humanity. I look through the jungles and what do I see? A town promoting destruction that lacks sanity. I look through their eyes and what do I see? A world full of peace that is rich in harmony.

Late night thoughts

[lustandlove-blog1]

Jazz is the music of stealth and secrecy.

[lustandlove-blog1]

You ruin your life by desensitizing yourself. We are all afraid to say too much, to feel too deeply, to let people know what they mean to us. Caring is not synonymous with crazy. Expressing to someone how special they are to you will make you vulnerable. There is no denying that. However, that is nothing to be ashamed of. There is something breathtakingly beautiful in the moments of smaller magic that occur when you strip down and are honest with those who are important to you. Let that girl know that she inspires you. Tell your mother you love her in front of your friends. Express, express, express. Open yourself up, do not harden yourself to the world, and be bold in who, and how you love. There is courage in that.

Bianca Sparacino (via perrfectly)

[lustandlove-blog1]

We’re all carrying around some shit. When you hear the things people have gone through and realize you’ve gone through the same, it provides an amazing amount of relief. It give us hope. And I think that’s what we’re supposed to get from each other. The hope that, maybe, just maybe, we’re going to be okay. Maybe.

Marc Maron, Attempting Normal  (via thatkindofwoman)

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