lilwoodnymph

[lilwoodnymph]

you just gotta love him more 

than you love the thought of death,

your own to be exact.

you cant let it overshadow

darken

corrupt

the best thing to ever happen to you.

this time last year i was on so many drugs 

i couldn’t even tell you what day it was, usually.

7 months ago i was lost in the depravity of homelessness,

did heroin, did meth,

was rescued by a higher power 

i call love.

you just gotta love him more

than you love the thought of death,

your own to be exact.

[lilwoodnymph]

Bohemia bridge

I'm just a girl who writes, then and there, If you put a pen in front of her. If you pulled the plug from her, Unwind and fade away, There she goes again. Where's the new sentence? Where's the new presence? It never changes and I thought all that was constant was change. How many brain cells does it take To change your mind? Don't be scared of your fear anymore. This time embrace the fact That words can't always rhyme and We don't always have enough time. My mother was bohemian She was more than the world could handle. In 50 years it had torn her to shreds She had me to be her medium. And in this world, we all crumble, From stardust we were built and to stardust We shall return. Use your soul for purity, And let your ashes become anew.

[lilwoodnymph]

My newest poetry anthology, Childhood’s Quietus.

[lilwoodnymph]

Pulverem Reverteris

The grass looks more green After thinking about my dead brother. I miss him more than usual today.

The wind feels more serene After thinking about my dead mother. I know she's better off today.

I am a hurricane of extremes I love with all that I am capable of And fear with all I know. I trust humans with a knife to my back But death is dishonest, death is the undertow.

I rubbed my mother's ashes on my forehead Like the ashes from palm branches. "Remember that you are dust, And to dust you shall return."

[lilwoodnymph]

Zachary Sgro

Our bones crack at the same pitch,

sneezing out all the powders and dust in our nostrils

from years and years ago.

Most of the good things I know,

I learned from you.

I remember a time when we weren’t speaking

arguments and disagreements.

Then you came to me in a dream-

following awakening, you came to me in reality.

Sometimes I think we’re soul mates

but not the kind that fall in love with each other.

I think us meeting so long ago was serendipitous,

and that in this world of 7.1 billion, 

we happened to be in the same town,

don’t you think it’s strange?

I worry about you a lot.

When I don’t hear from you for days I

check the obituaries.

Not because I don’t trust you,

but because I don’t trust death.

All the knowledge you have shared,

everything you have had to give, you have shared,

I receive your graciousness 

with little to return.

But do not think for a moment I take you for granted.

There is no god,

But if there was,

it would be within you.

[lilwoodnymph]

There's this reoccurring Strange fascination among us: The realization that we are minuscule In comparison- Our problems are nothing In the grand scheme of things. I don't like this. My problems are not small, They are tsunamis in an ocean I call my life. With medicine as a flotation device, And therapy to teach me how to swim, My problems are not small. I am not small. You are not small. We each are a counterpart In a vast, expanding universe. No matter the size of the planets Or the heat of the stars There is nothing more magnificent Than all of it, together.

[lilwoodnymph]

our choices are awake

he,                                                        saved your life without fear of

breaking your heart;                             never again

in a psych ward,                                   I met the truest of people.

never stopped to think of                     loving the same,

your trauma                                          the time travel dreams,

i have never loved                                like i have loved you      

blood thicker than water                       water thicker than blood

crimson angels in the snow                  keep yourself sane.

keep me alive.                                      in your embrace

there is no fate;                                    our choices are awake.

[lilwoodnymph]

Jacob Wayne Chaires

Just in case we run out of time

An angel sent me your way

“Can you make this man your lover?”

Of course, I hesitated,

But I am so glad I chose to call you my own.

When the tides rises and the

Air grows thin

You will always be in the wings

Not waiting, but instead,

Expecting.

Can you hear my heart sing at the sight of your face?

Have you heard my brain’s thoughts

At the glimpse of the halo’s in your eyes?

I have never known equality in such a thing called love

Request my soul,

Even though there is not much left of it, my

Soul is yours to keep.

[lilwoodnymph]

Amphetamines

Amidst the ravines of neurosis, Many lie victim to a sorrow- Places we call agony. Here lies hope in the sun. Extremes are abundant- The black and white thinking has me Aroused, surrounded by noise Mirages in daylight and Intravenous solutions. Next thing you know, Everything you once were Succumbs to the light.

[lilwoodnymph]

Museum of Enigma

"You look so much like your mom!" "You look so much like grandpa!" I look like my mother's agony- He looks like a man who gave his life for me. My lover looks like my favorite actor Sometimes, in the lighting of my room. It's interesting how the colors Reflect into his Halo'd eyes- I presume He is an angel straight from the gods. Onto another story of a time I breathed in too much carbon dioxide- And in that moment I met my life drive. Come visit me in the ravines of neurosis; Don't see why, But I lost my mother to cirrhosis. There's no doubt in my mind There will come a time Where things align. Serendipity at its finest, And dreams as they reoccur. Welcome to the museum of enigma That is my life.

[lilwoodnymph]

Are You Out of Your Mind?

here i am

half way out of my mind

inhaling bitterant and liquid nitrogen

in my dedicated lovers bed 

and i

hate this mind

because it was it that got me here in the first place

so i’ll inhale the day away to escape it

half way no more,

but wholly, instead,

totally out of my mind

[lilwoodnymph]

GOD

i found god in the universe

through the stars and the void

in which they reside

i found god in a man

who loves me enough

for the both of us

i found god in myself 

a dimension in which perspective

can never stay the same

[lilwoodnymph]

love 

like just words away from

a time where

we know each others eyes the way 

lost hearts know our minds.

skin left little to say

untitled stanzas want the day 

life made night.

you’ve got to feel the fall

fingers hope you’re inside.

gone ahead

need blood 

sun soul

tell the hold

the world is old

apart from

mothers homes,

hands dream

live, look, 

remember broken far bones.

trees stay alive longer

forget the dead bed,

man is cold,

really cold.

dreams go, lust came

lose death,

the past is open.

hard miss

sure is free

sound wont think tears okay.

[lilwoodnymph]

Sometimes I wonder If bullets taste as bitter As this sadness does

[lilwoodnymph]

swirling thoughts, i am wearing my scars as trophies. i must be crazy, but this is what happened. moonlight like an open wound, i can’t follow you around anymore (not like this) we’re fading into broken nights; delicately. stars that will grow in the dust and here i am waiting for you. not gentle enough for a storm, but rough enough for a disaster. why is it harder to love you like secret when you can’t even keep your mouth shut? when i can’t even keep it silent. it is swirling madness. i am swirling madness. can you run in the hurricane with feet unafraid of the cold? (maybe not like this) thoughts like tornado after tornado sweeping me off the ground, i stand here with million trophies, loud and proud. i keep planting sweet wind-seeds as i wait for you but i am not swirling enough for your taste.

tina jaxén // my madness wasn’t mad enough for you (via tinaspoetry)

[lilwoodnymph]

you think you know

[lilwoodnymph]

Mind the step

Even after everything I still forget drugs can speak Instead of you And a friendship can likely be More prominent than maternity Instincts- mind the step

Sometimes I think I was shaped By words alone And my psychiatrist said to feel the thoughts And let them go They say it in therapy, too Little worksheets teaching you to smile When you don’t want to

I can’t hear her voice when she said it But I remember crystal clear The words of my epitaph “Ungrateful cunt of a daughter I should’ve listened to your father When he said to abort you.” It plays again- mind the step

My identity is an ever-changing Stream of consciousness Adaptable I may seem Rigid as I may be I am nothing But I am a work in progress

I still wish I could let her meet him And hear her opinions But I am glad I do not have to hear her Wet-brained and talking with Lucifer But she can still hear me now And the wind grows wild With her laughter- mind the step