lets-dream-of-californication

[lets-dream-of-californication]

How to wear a knife strapped to your thigh with a garter like a fucking lady while managing not to slice yourself open because you were fool enough to carry an unsheathed weapon next to a squishy part of your body that moves when you walk.

Get a garter from somewhere; this one is a sock garter from Sock Dreams, which means it’s made to stay the fuck up there.

Get a fucking sheath for those sharp, pointy things and put them in the sheath. There’ll be a velcro loop at the top so that they won’t slide out if you hold the sheath upside down.

Put the garter through the loop at the top meant for whatever you’re using to attach it to yourself. Attach it to yourself, adjusting for ease of grabbing. You don’t want to put it on your inner thigh because that is awkward as hell to get out. The only way you’d be able to get it out in a timely manner is if you attached the sheath upside down, at which point you’d need two garters to keep the sheath from tilting inward toward your other thigh.

Oh no, now the sheath is hanging loosely and is going to make a weird pattern against your clothing. Tuck that shit into your stockings if you’re wearing them, or use another garter if you’re not.

Pull your pencil skirt back down over the knife sheath. Adjust accordingly due to tightness of skirt and shape of sheath. Make sure you can get at it as quick as you want.

People look at you really strangely if this is the knife you pull out when you want to cut your apple up.

[lets-dream-of-californication]

Whether you like a classic chignon or trendy top knot, the bun is always in style! The tutorial from The Beauty Department showing us how to make a bigger and better bun using 2 large braids is absolutely fab! This seems easy enough to achieve and looks amazing so I know that I will be trying this ASAP. 

<3 Chelsey, ModStylist

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[lets-dream-of-californication]

This heart elbow patch DIY from A Beautiful Mess is the perfect way to spice up a basic cardigan.

[lets-dream-of-californication]

DIY Ruffled Beaded Necklace from Thanks, I Made It

[lets-dream-of-californication]

[lets-dream-of-californication]

I’ve realized that you can’t really hack someone’s tumblr like you can on Facebook. On Facebook you can update a status to say, “I like dick in the eyeball,” and everyone would be freaked out. On tumblr, people would be like, “yeah man me too.” Then post a gif from supernatural.

[lets-dream-of-californication]

I would be a morning person, if morning happened around 1pm

[lets-dream-of-californication]

[lets-dream-of-californication]

im going to cry

[lets-dream-of-californication]

If you’re ever in britain, when you walk the dog it’s called “Dogging” 

So if you’re going to walk your dog be sure to ask all of your british friends if they’d like to come dogging with you!

Make sure to invite everyone out dogging when you come here!

[lets-dream-of-californication]

WHAT DO YOU AMERICANS MEAN WHEN A SHOW IS ON AT LIKE FUCKIN “8/7c” WHAT IS THAT????

[lets-dream-of-californication]

[lets-dream-of-californication]

I want someone to write a book where Mermaids are the women thrown off ships when the sailors got afraid because having a woman on the boat is bad luck. And as they sink to the bottom legs tied together they change slowly until they can breath, until they can use their tied up legs to swim. And they drown sailors in revenge, luring them in by singing in their husky voices still stinging from the salt water they breathed. 

[lets-dream-of-californication]

I hope when you die you get to see your stats like how many times you laughed or told a lie or kissed or how many people loved you and how many people hated you and what you meant to people

[lets-dream-of-californication]

"I admire anybody who has the guts to write anything at all."

E.B. White (via journaling-junkie)

[lets-dream-of-californication]

[lets-dream-of-californication]

why are boobs and butts so enticing they are literally sacks of fat