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Yato: Look, I think it's only fair to warn you that I'm practiced in the ancient art... Yato: ...of ORIGAMI! Bishamon: Paper folding? Yato: ..Oh. Yato: I was hoping you wouldn't know what that was.
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Tango, Charlston and Contamporary. 
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Yukine bursting Yato’s bubble
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Hiyori: Why is your back all scratched up? Yato: [ flashes back to chasing a cat after Yukine told him to leave it alone ] Yato: I'm having an affair.
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Yato: I don’t get paid enough for this. Yukine: For what? Yato: [ Gestures to everything ]
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Kazuma: Is it true that Yato once spent three days in the trunk of his car, waiting to scare Hiyori?
Yukine: No.
Kofuku: It was five.
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Yato: How can I get Hiyori to ask me out?
Yukine: Well, you know how everyone always says ‘Be yourself’? Well, don’t do that.
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Yato: Just so you know, I’m only telling you this because I care deeply for you.
Yato: Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Hiyori:
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If you guys have any ideas, lemme know by just messaging me or something. My creativity is completely gone so if you have any, just send them. (ᵔᴥᵔ)
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Yato: you can never lose an argument if you say “shut up nerd” at the end
Bishamon: yes you can
Yato: shut up nerd
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Kofuku (barges into Bishamon’s room while she’s sleeping): Bisha! Yato and Hiyori are dating!
Bishamon: Good morning, Kofuku.
Kofuku: Yato! And! Hiyori! Are! Dating!
Bishamon: Yeah, they are.
Kofuku: Woohoo! (leaves)
Kazuma (pokes head out from under the covers): Do you think she knew I was here?
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I LOVE THISSS SM <3
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So I watched Noragami
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Yato: Anybody under 5'7 can't be talking about fighting someone. Like, what you gonna do? Headbutt someone in the nipples? Yukine: Say goodbye to your kneecaps, asshole.
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Hiyori: Yato, I want you.
Yato: Want me for what?
Hiyori: …
Yato: Forgot what you were going to say? Don’t worry, happens to me all the time.
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When did this happeeeeennnnnn??? Thank you guys so much for 1K! Like Jesus, why do you like this cancer of an account. 😂
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Yato: Ohh babe, you had a crush on me? That's embarrassing! Hiyori: ...we're married.
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