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Cardiovascular

Tw: panic attack, sensory overload, medical talk, minor/unintentional self harm

Ray sits down in the woods. He comes here when he needs space, a break from David's aggressive, overbearing, suffocating feelings. His heart feels far too big in his chest, pounding against his esophagus, crushing his lungs each time both expanded. Thump. Thump. Thump.

He stares at his hands. Too smooth, but unnaturally rough. No fingerprints, but the oddest texture across the entire surface of his palms and the pads of his fingers. He takes a deep breath and feels his heartbeat pounding at his throat. Purple eyes, faintly glowing green, stare at the forest floor past his hands. He can hear the slight wind rustling the branches above him, the birds and the squirrels and the bugs all chittering, running through the forest. And of course, that horrible thump thump thump of his heart. It's all so unbearably loud. He can't think, doesn't remember what it feels like. He vaguely pinpoints the sensation as mild sensory overload, as his doctors research taught him when he was into psychology. He scratches at the texture of his palms, now detesting their inhuman nature. His ring finger's nail draws a scrape and a bead of blood, indicating his need to trim it.

Thump thump thump. His heart beats harder at that, but he supresses a whine at the crushing feeling. It's loud enough here as is, and he doesn't want to risk someone hearing and getting a counselor. Worse still, hearing and coming over, that concerned look on their face. He thinks the first real words he has since he came here. Walking on eggshells around me, as always. He lets out a breath he didn't realize he'd been holding. As always, he was the weakling, and the center of attention. Imaginary audience, his logic supplies, but having a name and cause doesn't make the feelings any more tolerable.

Thump thump thump. His heart beats faster at his anger and annoyance. He knows the causes of this psychological phenomenon. Knows how to prevent it, logically, but logic doesn't have a say in this. It's infuriating. He lifts his still bleeding palm to his lips, licking up the blood before it spills onto the ground and attracts some animal. Or worse, tips someone off to the fact that he's been here. The metallic taste doesn't help calm his overactive senses. He tries not to gag as he licks the blood from the already healed up scrape. It was just a minor abrasion, after all, he just saw it worse than it was.

He takes a mental step back, focusing on nothing in particular. His focus moves again to that horrible thudding in his chest. Thump thump thump. It's faster, more intense, more overwhelming than it had ever been at camp. Thump Thump thump. He becomes dimly aware of his breathing becoming harder to fight against the intrusive thumping, the beating against his organs so unpleasant and rough he feels he might die. Thump Thump Thump. They're both speeding up now, fighting inside him. The intrusive, altered organ pumping bleached and redyed blood through his veins. Why had he done that? Thump Thump Thump.

Sigh.

The noise comes out of him involuntarily as his focus shifts to his lungs. The perfectly normal, if struggling right now, natural grown organs. He forces his thoughts away from the still intrusive heart pounding in his chest. He swallows, realizing now that he's not moved since he got here. He stands up and walks around the clearing, wincing at the too loud rustling of his heavy boots against the leaves. He stretches, leaving his feet planted to stay as quiet as possible for his sensitive ears. He winces at each pop of his bones, and the dimming light hitting his face. He'd run here around 5, which means he's probably been here at least half an hour. He'll have to explain to David why he's been gone. The thought of that makes him want to sit down and curl up and let the thudding of his heart consume him.

He sighs again, before moving to start walking back to camp.

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tiny transparent healthpacks

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What body part are you?

Tagged by: stolen from @candyviper

Tagging: steal it

Your result: Lungs

Breathe in. The ability to breathe is almost completely reflexive, and like most things, it comes to you naturally, with little effort or meaning. Many of the diseases that affect the lungs are hereditary, is there some unknown family trauma there? Something someone wasn’t telling you? If we only inhale, we die. If we only exhale, we die. We need both. You have mastered that tactful dance, at least, until something unexpected comes knocking. Something that steals your breath away, that pries your oh so precious air from your lungs and leaves you cold, winded and alone. A collapsed lung cannot kill you, but it aches more than broken bone, it’s sticky and bloody and cloying. You can recover though. You always have. Breathe out.

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splattered red on lab coats? classy, elegant, dashing, chic. but spattered green on lab coats??? that is a whole other level of swanky that i don’t think we appreciate as much

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(source)

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I think that not giving Ray a dog was very unsexy of me so at home he has a dog. 3 of them actually, but the other two are service dogs for his dad and sister

His is named Zombie, his dad's is Nilla, and his sister's is Darling

They're a King Charles Spaniel, a Golden Retriever, and a Samoyed respectively.

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You can tell a lot about a person based on their living space

Describe your muse’s…

🏠- House ⛰- Front/backyard 🌹- Garden 🚙- Car 📺- Living room/lounge 🔪- Kitchen 🕳- Basement 🛁- Bathroom(s) 🛏- Bedroom(s) 👕- Closet 🛌- Bedding 📥- Nightstand 📦- Desk 🗑- Trashcan 🎐- items/knick knacks they collected 🎀- Jewelry or accessories they have 🐻- Toys or stuffed animals (theirs or not) 🖼- Framed photos ⚱️- Homely decorations 💆- Their hairbrush 📖- Their diary 📔- Their notes/records 🗓- Their calendar 🕰- Their clock 👝- The contents of their purse/backpack/bag 🛠- The contents of their toolbox 🕯- The contents of their emergency supply kit 🍎- The kind of food they store in the kitchen 🔨- Their garage ❓- Any secret rooms they have

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Goliath has opened Pandora's Box

And humans whisper their sorrow

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https://www.instagram.com/p/BdrKBAygzhk/

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Anonymous said to aliens-stim-too: hey! can i please have a stimboard for oliva octavius from into the spiderverse? thank you ily!

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9

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Oxidizing Mushroom

Source: 🐕

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I Never Told You What I Do For A Living - Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge //

Desert Song - Life On The Murder Scene

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@ people who know how to Tumblr how do you put a read more help I'm a mobile user