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so I go to animation school now

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if your dom is older you call him daddy, but what if he’s younger? what am i supposed to call a hot attractive dom who is younger than me?

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this one time I ran a red light on mistake and I didn’t notice it was red until it was too late so I just ran the light screeching like an angry pterodactyl the entire time

a cop was at the intersection so he pulled me over and when he came up to my window he was wheezing cause he was laughing so hard and he said

“ok so i know you ran a red light and that’s really bad and you should never do it again but i’m not gonna give you a ticket cause that was the funniest thing i’ve ever seen and my partner can’t get out of the car cause he’s laughing so hard he’s about to pee himself”

i forgot that i’d had my window open when i ran the red light and the cop told me that all he heard from my car was this really high-pitched “screeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEAAAHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhh”

and that’s how i got out of getting a ticket for running a red light

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i hope this baja blasts you well

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god ok a few years back i had this friend who was like. an influencer. like a legitimate instagram influencer. paid promotions from makeup companies type. and we were talking and she was like wait how many tumblr followers do you have and i was like uhhhhhh 4k and she was like ooooo you should start doing advertisements on there get yourself some money. and i just quietly sat with the realization that we were two very, very different people

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I remember back then

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WHAT DID I DO

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Source: Instagram

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as much as I hate the term “tumblr veteran,” I am one, so I made a uquiz about it. let me assign you an OTP. I’m so sorry.

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biting is a love language. no i will not elaborate.

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I’m looking for ppl to shoot, if you’re in or visiting NYC, please let me know if something can be arranged.

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can’t wait for the final boss battle of duolingo when you fight the 50 foot owl armed with nothing but your wits, a sword, and your shaky grasp of verb conjugations