alterhumanperidot

[alterhumanperidot]

Guys I want you all to know that Till saw Luka as Ivan, not Mizi. Not once did he hallucinate her during that sequence it was Ivan until the very end until Till saw Mizi in the audience and died in her arms. He cares for both of them guys. BOTH OF THEM. What if I krilled myshelf

[alterhumanperidot]

but can i talk about these shots specifically please. its so tender and hopeless i think this single act alone made me lose my mind more than the kiss im

[alterhumanperidot]

losing my shit on how till literally never looks at ivan unless theyre actively fighting, like even in the flashback

and then during the song its the same thing

all ivan wants is for till to acknowledge him, just to look at him for even one second, give him a second thought- but he cant even do that

so then ivan does the fucking makout/choking sacrifice thing- "oh isnt he a hypocrite for getting mad at sua for doing the same thing?" no, because he was mad at sua because she knew what she would do would hurt mizi because she loved her.

ivan doesnt think sacrificing himself will hurt till, because till will never love him. HE KNOWS THIS AND YET HE STILL SACRIFICES HIMSELF FOR SOMEONE HE THINKS WILL NEVER LOVE HIM

AND EVEN NOW TILL WONT LOOK AT HIM

and then once he's certain till is safe, he gives him one last, real, selfish kiss

a last ditch admission of his love before

till finally looks at him, just too late

IM LOSING MY GODDAMN MIND GUYS ISTG

[alterhumanperidot]

A lot of people are talking about Ivan's hypocrisy with Sua and how he berates her for sacrificing herself for Mizi and becoming a source of trauma for her and then he did the same thing, but there's a heartbreaking perspective on this.

Sua and Mizi loved each other. The love was reciprocal. Sua died KNOWING Mizi loved her. Ivan's dislike of her comes from the fact that she knew damn well what her death would do to the person who loved her and she did it anyway. She KNOWINGLY hurt Mizi in the worst way possible while still claiming to love her.

Ivan? Ivan's been drilled for YEARS that Till DOESN'T love him. His love isn't returned. It's very possible that he just believes that he won't be a source of trauma for Till, because Till doesn't love him. So he can die for him all he wants. Of course, the elephant in the room is that we no longer know what Till thinks of Ivan after he kissed him and sacrificed himself for him, but that's AFTER Ivan is already dead. He had no intentions or expectations that what he did would actually hurt Till. And there is something so unbelievably sad about that.

[alterhumanperidot]

[alterhumanperidot]

being a system is so silly like here's ur severe mental illness it comes with a free puppy

[alterhumanperidot]

“Do it scared” but please realize that, if you Do It Scared too much and don’t let yourself rest + relax + have fun in between, you will fuck yourself up. If you “do it scared” all day every day, you will burn out badly and quickly. Sometimes this is temporarily necessary but please keep this in mind.

[alterhumanperidot]

utilising the gift of imagination to hallucinate moments of tenderness between fictional people

[alterhumanperidot]

I've never related to anything more than I relate to this...crazy!

Anyone else stuck in a freeze response for years and years and years and years

[alterhumanperidot]

[alterhumanperidot]

Kinito from Kinitopet

Is a caregiver!

[alterhumanperidot]

Agere Petname / Title ideas

For tinies:

baby (girl/boy), sweetheart, love, flower, petal, sunshine, moonbeam, angel, darling, prankster, princess / prince / princette, little royal, buddy, sapling, my dawn, sweet (girl/boy), padawan, sweetness, doll

For pets:

bun / bunny, kitty / kitten, pup / puppy, lamb, cub, kit, dove, baby bat, fawn, bambi, fledgling, birdie, mini moth, buggie, baby bug, hopper, little leap frog, teddy bear

Food inspired:

cupcake, berry, gumdrop, honey, cookie, sugar, sweetie pie, sushi roll tootsie, bean, sweet pea, peanut, tater tot, pumpkin

For fem carers:

mama, mami, nana, m(o/u)mmy, m(o/u)mma, ma, miss, auntie, tia, amma, granny, grammy, mimi, didi, big sis, sissy

For masc carers:

papa, dada, daddy, abba, pa, pop, sir, mister, uncle, tito, zio, grampy, big bro

For gender neutral carers:

baba, zaza, bubba, nonny, captain, care bear, bubbie / bubby, big sib

Non english

mi corazón - my heart in spanish

mio tesoro - my treasure in italian

bambino - baby in italian

mon cœur - my heart in french

fleur - flower in french

ange - angel in french

[alterhumanperidot]

tw: sad/vent post

Being touch-starved while being an age regressor without a caregiver is so hard, it feels like suffocating sometimes. I wanna be hugged and held when I cry. I wanna be pulled into someone's lap and rocked to sleep. I want someone to cup my cheek and kiss my forehead. I want someone to hold my hand as we walk and pull me a little bit closer. I want tenderness so badly it hurts ❤️‍🩹

[alterhumanperidot]

saw this on pinterest and thought it might be something traumagenic systems who struggle with thinking their trauma isn't enough need to see

[alterhumanperidot]

System culture is freaking out about something and then.. Oh wait, I was just having an episode. It's not that serious. Wait, it was that serious. Why don't I feel anything towards this specific event anymore guys. Guys. What the fuck did you do.

[alterhumanperidot]

I like letting our alters have farms on Stardew Valley. It's nice. We let the littles play life sim and farm games a lot. They absolutely adore it. :)

[alterhumanperidot]

youre not gonna be able to bully the minecraft movie directors into reanimating anything because unlike with the sonic movie clearly the people who made this movie lack any personal nostalgia for it and dont get it beyond "game my kids play" and therefore just decided to take a popular ip and throw popular actors at it and spit out a corporate slop script and designs because they dont care about the viewers beyond their ability to consume and they dont care about the consumers' time unless it gives them money. to them we are pigs and this is the scraps mixed in a pail with mud and worms for us to gobble up and keep growing their coffers. its not made because they care and its not made to be cared about and i promise in like 2 years it'll disappear off streaming services because they dont care about it enough to pay to keep it around and obviously nobody's gonna rewatch it. honestly just dont watch it. not even out of spite. there's better things out there that respect your time and your hard-earned money