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there’s a post going around about mixing nyquil with 5 hour energy and I’m thinking about the time my parents were both out of town and my brother was in charge of dropping me off at school and I must’ve been 15 or 16 and I was really miserably sick so he gave me nyquil and but the time we were pulling up to the school I was crashing so his friend who was driving said ‘I have a redbull in the glove compartment” and they said “drink it and it’ll like even it out” so I did and I walked into school at 7:30 AM

and then immediately the last bell rang and school was over.

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Francisco de Zurbarán. Saint Lucy (Detail, ca. 1625-1630).

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Okay maybe mama did raise a fool

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“Clocks slay time… time is dead as long as it is being clicked off by little wheels; only when the clock stops does time come to life.”

— William Faulkner, The Sound and the Fury

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if you brought shakespeare back to life and showed him the lion king i bet he’d be like “this shit fucks why didn’t anyone tell me i could use lions” 

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okay i’ll bite. what are movies?

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if you c*nsor anything in a post you are l*gally required to put all of the omitted v*wels at the end as a footn*te

*eeoo

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How to tell who wrote the musical you’re listening to

*moody guitar riff*: Jonathan Larson

colloquial angst: Joe Iconis

the most vulgar baroque opera you’ve ever heard: William Finn

unhummable: Sondheim

hella hummable: Rodgers and Hammerstein

*soaring melody* *same soaring melody repeated 100 times but you cry anyway*: Alain Boublil and Claude-Michel Schönberg

where have I heard this before?: Andrew Lloyd Webber

everyone is singing their own thing and you can’t possibly sing along anymore: Lin-Manuel Miranda

*key change*: Pasek and Paul

what the actual fuck: Robert Lopez

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Someone actually do this please. I’m dying to see if your IB world school is anything like mine.

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i’m using Internet Explorer, i hope this posts quickly. happy new year 2011

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Like zoinks Scoob! You tampered in God’s domain!

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*from computer speakers* vsauce, *from suddenly behind you* michael here

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“you’re all posers” i say to the models. they are very good at their job

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2018 has been going on for like 20 months but october lasted like a week… what’s the deal